Latest / The Ben Maller Show / Hour 3 - Still Open?

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Hour 3 - Still Open? · The Ben Maller Show

0:00
Speaker 1: It's a thriller by god Zella. Unless it's not.
0:03
Speaker 2: It's our numb ber three hour three and how New
0:08
Speaker 2: You Do?
0:09
Speaker 3: And here an hour number three of the Ben Malor Show.
0:12
Speaker 3: Reminder the fifth hour podcast.
0:14
Speaker 1: We'll be coming up. Want you to listen to that,
0:15
Speaker 1: be part of the show. And we have Malard Palooza
0:18
Speaker 1: next week.
0:18
Speaker 3: So if you have not, Andrew, We've got a lot
0:20
Speaker 3: of people who want to be part of this. If
0:22
Speaker 3: you haven't done it yet, time is running out. Make
0:25
Speaker 3: sure to send me a message saying, hey, I'm in Maller,
0:27
Speaker 3: I got an act we just heard from. Can't close
0:29
Speaker 3: the deal, Neil, He's in. That's exciting, that's a big deal.
0:34
Speaker 3: So we'd love to have you be part of it.
0:35
Speaker 3: Blair and Maine says he's going to do it. You'll
0:37
Speaker 3: hear that in fact this hour. Also here in hour
0:40
Speaker 3: number three, Vikings coach Kevin O'Connell continues to sell an
0:46
Speaker 3: open competition between Kyler Murray Alligator Arms Murray and JJ McCarthy,
0:51
Speaker 3: the Michigan Man. So what's your take on what's going
0:55
Speaker 3: on here? We'll talk about that. Also, is there anything
0:57
Speaker 3: to this rumor that should ure Sanders is closing the
1:02
Speaker 3: gap on the Cowboys starting quarterback job.
1:05
Speaker 1: We'll go there.
1:06
Speaker 3: Also, US soccer headliner Christian Polisic is getting unfairly criticized
1:13
Speaker 3: for what happened in the World Cup, the flopparou According
1:16
Speaker 3: to a soccer pundit, thumb's down or thumbs up on
1:21
Speaker 3: Christian Polisic getting unfair criticism for US soccer's embarrassing end
1:27
Speaker 3: at the World Cup. We'll talk about all that and
1:28
Speaker 3: more right now. Settle in. It is the hour three
1:32
Speaker 3: edition on this Friday, So you're saying.
1:40
Speaker 1: It's open.
1:41
Speaker 3: What welcome In the beginning of another hour of the
1:47
Speaker 3: Ben Malor Show.
1:49
Speaker 1: We are in the air.
1:52
Speaker 2: Ev way literally way out into the wild blue yonder
2:00
Speaker 2: I mean, I mean came to see that far and
2:03
Speaker 2: we sculpt our takes.
2:05
Speaker 3: We have a food fight every night coast to coast,
2:08
Speaker 3: border to border and beyond. On the mast and elegantly
2:14
Speaker 3: powerful microphones of fs are amminating live do it live
2:20
Speaker 3: from a telegraph as we telegraph. Our punch is ganteed
2:25
Speaker 3: human bobbing and weaving around the radio dial from the
2:30
Speaker 3: world famous Fox Sports Radio studios, where none other than
2:35
Speaker 3: the Man the Myth, the legend Lenny.
2:39
Speaker 1: From Fort Lauderdale. Haven't heard from Lenny in a while.
2:42
Speaker 1: I hope he's all right.
2:43
Speaker 3: Lenny reminds us this hour made possible in part by
2:47
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3:33
Speaker 3: He did reach out and say, Ben, people love home depot.
3:36
Speaker 3: I said, you don't have to send that in. I
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Speaker 3: know the black irishman there in omahas happy about that
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Speaker 1: Though.
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3:59
Speaker 1: Now.
4:00
Speaker 3: Thank the Insomniac, who briefly was a celebrity caller on
4:03
Speaker 3: the show. He's at Tampa, Mikey the Insomniac, and we
4:07
Speaker 3: really liked his stick, and then something happened with his
4:11
Speaker 3: phone and we're not sure what happened with this.
4:13
Speaker 1: One, but he stopped calling the show as a celebrity.
4:16
Speaker 3: Caller and he's lost his status as a celebrity caller.
4:20
Speaker 3: I might have gone to the day shift there. I'm
4:21
Speaker 3: not sure if to check with Mike and Tucson and
4:24
Speaker 3: find out. But he said, hey Ben, what about Fox one?
4:27
Speaker 1: That's right. The excitement of the FIFA World Cup is now.
4:29
Speaker 3: Streaming live on Fox one, the official English streaming platform,
4:35
Speaker 3: to catch every unforgettable moment. The game's continued later today
4:38
Speaker 3: in LA, but it's on Fox one this afternoon, so
4:41
Speaker 3: it depends on what time zone you're in. But Fox
4:43
Speaker 3: one brings the action straight to your screen, so you
4:46
Speaker 3: never miss a goal. Download Fox one and experience the
4:50
Speaker 3: FIFA World Cup all right, and.
4:54
Speaker 1: I mentioned France. We mentioned this.
4:57
Speaker 3: They went two to nothing over Morocco, so that that
5:01
Speaker 3: is done and they will face either Spain or Belgium
5:06
Speaker 3: in the semi finals. That'll be in Dallas on Tuesday.
5:11
Speaker 3: So mark that down, all right, You got that jotted
5:14
Speaker 3: down there. Yeah, France. They had a twenty one to
5:17
Speaker 3: four advantage in shots on goal, which I'm told is
5:19
Speaker 3: pretty good. I'm told that's pretty good, and an eight
5:23
Speaker 3: to one edge in shots on target for the game.
5:26
Speaker 3: So not a lot of scoring opportunities for Morocco. And
5:31
Speaker 3: they go down, down, down, down, down, down, down down down. Now, Rob,
5:36
Speaker 3: the ambassador of Bakersfield, says, been stop it. He said, Ben,
5:40
Speaker 3: tell me about Express. I said, okay, because you're the legend.
5:43
Speaker 3: We had a great Mallard meet and greet in Bakersfield.
5:45
Speaker 3: We closed down a baseball team that had been in
5:47
Speaker 3: that town for one hundred years. All it needed was
5:48
Speaker 3: a Mallard meet and greet. They went belly up, they
5:51
Speaker 3: went away. It also might have been the fact that
5:54
Speaker 3: they had down the left field line.
5:57
Speaker 1: It was the Yeah, I think it would know it
5:59
Speaker 1: was the right field line. Was it the right field line?
6:01
Speaker 1: I think it was rightfield.
6:02
Speaker 3: Had they had picnic benches one of the lines, Oh no,
6:05
Speaker 3: it was he was a third baseline. They had picnic
6:07
Speaker 3: benches down the line instead of seats. That might have
6:11
Speaker 3: been why they went out of business as well. I'm
6:13
Speaker 3: just saying, now.
6:14
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Speaker 3: slash disclosures. All right, we'll pause and coming up next
6:43
Speaker 3: more commercials.
6:43
Speaker 1: But in the meantime we have.
6:45
Speaker 3: A live Malar monologue, unbelievable monologue to interrupt these commercials
6:51
Speaker 3: are leave this hour from Minnesota, the Twin Cities, the
6:55
Speaker 3: home of the Juicy Lucy and some great fans of
6:58
Speaker 3: the Ben Malers. Show what a rollicking great time we
7:00
Speaker 3: had in the Twin Cities back in the day. So
7:02
Speaker 3: the Vikings quarterback competition between JJ McCarthy and.
7:10
Speaker 1: Kyler Murray.
7:11
Speaker 3: Alligator arms Murray is unresolved. Now, how would it be resolved.
7:15
Speaker 3: They haven't started training camp, so there's no reason for
7:17
Speaker 3: it to be resolved. They're heading into training camp, all
7:20
Speaker 3: the nice people, all the celebrities, they're golfing in northern California. Well,
7:27
Speaker 3: it's now taking a curious turn on if you saw
7:29
Speaker 3: this or heard about this.
7:30
Speaker 1: Maybe you did, maybe he didn't. I don't know. We'll
7:33
Speaker 1: fill them the gap on that.
7:34
Speaker 3: So coach Kevin O'Connell, who is the head coach of
7:38
Speaker 3: the Minnesota football.
7:39
Speaker 1: Team, continues to refuse to name a starter.
7:43
Speaker 3: He popped up recently on the airwaves of Fox Sports Radio, So,
7:46
Speaker 3: how many shows are at this golf tournament? Is it
7:49
Speaker 3: Stegatts out there? And Dan Patrick? I guess the company's
7:53
Speaker 3: got some money to send these guys out there.
7:54
Speaker 1: Good for them.
7:55
Speaker 3: And on the Dan Patrick show, O'Connell Kevin O'Connell again
8:01
Speaker 3: asked about this. He talked about open competition. He said, quote,
8:04
Speaker 3: I'm not really familiar with a close competition. We want
8:08
Speaker 3: the guys to push to find exactly what they can
8:13
Speaker 3: become as players. O'Connell said, and it's okay to be
8:16
Speaker 3: uncomfortable doing that sometimes.
8:18
Speaker 1: Close quote.
8:19
Speaker 3: Now, JJ McCarthy famously had had a hissy fit over
8:24
Speaker 3: Kyler Murray. Murray just gave some cliches. And there's also
8:28
Speaker 3: Carson Wentz. And so those are the quarterbacks in Minnesota.
8:32
Speaker 3: That is a good jumping off point. Let us discuss
8:35
Speaker 3: the question. Vikings coach Kevin O'Connell continues continues to sell
8:43
Speaker 3: an open competition between Kyler Murray and JJ McCarthy. What's
8:47
Speaker 3: your take on what's going on here in the Twin Cities.
8:50
Speaker 3: So I've got NASA, seagulls and earthworm and we will combine.
8:57
Speaker 1: All of these things together.
8:59
Speaker 3: We're gonna have some French onion soup. It's gotta be
9:03
Speaker 3: on your big board. Yeah, I'm not a huge soup guy.
9:06
Speaker 3: Like the nice Matzi ball soup, A chicken soup, a
9:10
Speaker 3: French onion right there. There's not many other soups. There's
9:15
Speaker 3: not many other soups that would go for not many
9:18
Speaker 3: of the soups that I would go for it. Now,
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Speaker 3: my first thought on this, Kevin O'Connell keeps calling it
9:22
Speaker 3: in quote open competition because saying Kyler Murray's the starter
9:27
Speaker 3: by default because JJ McCarthy melted down like a cheap
9:31
Speaker 3: candle in asana doesn't play well with the bass. You
9:34
Speaker 3: gotta take care of the base. The Viky's quarterback situation
9:37
Speaker 3: is so bleak?
9:38
Speaker 1: How bleak is it?
9:39
Speaker 3: It is so bleak that NASA called and they want
9:43
Speaker 3: to study the quarterback situation in Minnesota as a new
9:49
Speaker 3: form of dark matter. They think they've discovered a new
9:52
Speaker 3: form of dark matter. There, it's in the quarterback room.
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Speaker 3: O'Connell is not to me. He's not selling competition. He's
10:00
Speaker 3: running a clearance shop. It's like one of those Amazon
10:03
Speaker 3: return pop up shops, and he's selling hope. He's selling hope.
10:07
Speaker 3: It's been opened, it's reboxed at whatever. He looks down
10:11
Speaker 3: the depth chart and sees nothing but warning labels and
10:15
Speaker 3: recall notices and do not operate heavy machinery stickers and
10:21
Speaker 3: all that. Kyler Alligator arms Murray in the pole position, allegedly,
10:28
Speaker 3: not because he earned it, however, because he won the
10:31
Speaker 3: least bad quarterback contest. Congratulations, all right, way to go.
10:35
Speaker 3: The NFL's equivalent of being the tallest garden.
10:38
Speaker 1: Gnome, if you know what I mean.
10:40
Speaker 3: So Minnesota they had a and Kevin o'connahatt a front
10:43
Speaker 3: row seat to the Hindenburg. That was JJ McCarthy's season
10:48
Speaker 3: a year ago. That was not football. That was cover
10:54
Speaker 3: your eyes bad. It was performance art about human suffer.
11:00
Speaker 1: What it was.
11:01
Speaker 3: He was so staggered and bedraggled that the Vikings went
11:06
Speaker 3: out and added a gamer, a guy that doesn't even
11:10
Speaker 3: like football, A guy that had it in his contract
11:14
Speaker 3: that he had to watch tape and then bitched about
11:16
Speaker 3: it and they took.
11:17
Speaker 1: It out of the contract.
11:18
Speaker 3: That's the guy they brought in who's got noted attitude
11:22
Speaker 3: issues and needs a high chair when he eats with
11:25
Speaker 3: his teammates in the cafeteria. That's the guy. That's how
11:29
Speaker 3: bad JJ McCarthy is. It's not a quarterback room, it's
11:34
Speaker 3: a quarterback escape room. And Kevin O'Connell's still looking for
11:37
Speaker 3: the first clue. He's trying to find the first flue.
11:40
Speaker 4: Now.
11:41
Speaker 3: Secondly to Cleveland, we go now early in the offseason.
11:46
Speaker 3: We talked about this a little while ago, but there's
11:48
Speaker 3: new people listening all the time. So it looked like
11:50
Speaker 3: the Browns were more than comfortable rolling, rolling and rolling
11:54
Speaker 3: with Deshaun Watson as their QB number one to begin
12:00
Speaker 3: the season, so they know that. They then what happened
12:05
Speaker 3: is they they made the mistake, and it's it's really unfortunate.
12:10
Speaker 3: The Browns decided to actually watch Deshaun Watson practice.
12:16
Speaker 1: Uh, that did not go well.
12:18
Speaker 3: We are told that did not go well and he
12:20
Speaker 3: did not handle that the way he handles massages. So
12:23
Speaker 3: reports from OTA's and Mini Camp were we're not glowing.
12:28
Speaker 3: We're not glowing about Watson. Of course should Sanders did
12:32
Speaker 3: not earn great reviews either, and so now we are
12:35
Speaker 3: at a fork in the road.
12:37
Speaker 1: We're now hearing I love these reports.
12:39
Speaker 3: The latest reporting is that the Browns sophomore quarterback mister
12:44
Speaker 3: Sanders has quote closed the gap close quote on Deshaun Watson. Question,
12:52
Speaker 3: is there anything to the rumor that Shoulder Sanders is
12:56
Speaker 3: quote closing the gap on the Browns starting quarterback job
13:00
Speaker 3: in the year twenty twenty six.
13:02
Speaker 1: So this is and we be very clear here, I'm
13:05
Speaker 1: me be level headed.
13:06
Speaker 3: This is a completely manufactured storyline. How the hell with
13:13
Speaker 3: Sardur Sanders leap frog over to Shaun Watson when the
13:16
Speaker 3: Browns having practice in a while, right, go down to
13:19
Speaker 3: McDonald's in Cleveland, and don't get the big mac, don't
13:23
Speaker 3: get the quarter.
13:23
Speaker 1: Powder with cheese. No, no, no no.
13:26
Speaker 3: There's a special item they have only in Cleveland. It's
13:28
Speaker 3: called the nothing Burger and it's perfect with the factory
13:31
Speaker 3: of sadness. And you also get a side of hot air.
13:34
Speaker 3: You get a little basket of hot air to go with.
13:36
Speaker 1: That nothing burger. Really good, really really good.
13:39
Speaker 3: So the reality is the Browns quarterback competition is sponsored
13:43
Speaker 3: by Ambient Congratulations. One series of Brown's quarterback play and
13:48
Speaker 3: here's what it sounds like.
13:52
Speaker 1: Yeah, new head coach Todd Munken, the monk Man.
13:56
Speaker 3: Famously missed the team photo because he was getting a
13:58
Speaker 3: haircut or the coach's photo with the meetings league meetings.
14:01
Speaker 3: So Todd Munkin has not named a starter, and I'll
14:04
Speaker 3: tell you why because legally he cannot declare none of
14:07
Speaker 3: the above. The NFL has said, you cannot have the
14:11
Speaker 3: headless horsemen. You gotta have a quarterback. So the old
14:15
Speaker 3: line they say, if you have two quarterbacks, you don't
14:17
Speaker 3: really have one. And it's kind of like trying to
14:20
Speaker 3: drive a car with two steering wheels, very difficult to do.
14:22
Speaker 1: That the whole battle. You know what this is like.
14:26
Speaker 3: It's like if you're at the beach this summer and
14:28
Speaker 3: you watch two seagulls fighting over a stale French fly, Well,
14:32
Speaker 3: what are you doing? It's a stale front. It doesn't matter.
14:35
Speaker 3: The birds want it, the bird brains wanted. The seagulls
14:37
Speaker 3: are fighting over it. Bad job by you. Now at
14:39
Speaker 3: this point, the most accurate passer the Cleveland guys have
14:45
Speaker 3: is the person that runs out at halftime and throws
14:48
Speaker 3: the T shirts into the crowd. They don't have cheerleaders
14:51
Speaker 3: in Cleveland. There's people that run out and throw T shirts.
14:54
Speaker 3: That's the person that has the most accuracy in the
14:56
Speaker 3: quarterback room in Cleveland. All right, final thought to the
15:00
Speaker 3: World Cup. Are we gonna do a malamnologue about France advancing?
15:03
Speaker 3: Hell no, But there's more of an autopsy on the Red, White,
15:07
Speaker 3: and Blue going belly up in the biggest game of
15:11
Speaker 3: the World Cup, a round of sixteen. So the fallout
15:15
Speaker 3: from this as we continue through the autopsy, Christian Polisic,
15:20
Speaker 3: the captain of Team USA, the star player. A lot
15:24
Speaker 3: of hype about this guy and he has been getting
15:28
Speaker 3: absolutely destroyed.
15:31
Speaker 1: And just getting attacked all over.
15:33
Speaker 3: The criticism is in the air everywhere for Christian Polisic,
15:37
Speaker 3: the escapegoating online for to be kind a lackluster performance. Now,
15:42
Speaker 3: he started okay, had an assist in the opener against Paraguay,
15:47
Speaker 3: and then vanished. He spent more time in the injury
15:49
Speaker 3: tenth than he did running on the pitch. That led
15:52
Speaker 3: to a soccer pundit named Craig Burley, I have no
15:57
Speaker 3: idea who this is. Apparently he played in the World Cup,
15:59
Speaker 3: not for America. He's on TV now and he pushed
16:02
Speaker 3: back strongly, calling on the dog pile and it has
16:06
Speaker 3: been a dog pile against Polisic. He said, it's embarrassing
16:11
Speaker 3: and way over the top. He argued it's unfair to
16:15
Speaker 3: treat Polisic as the sole reason for failure when the
16:20
Speaker 3: entire USA squad underperformed at the World Cup, and that
16:24
Speaker 3: much of the talk, he claimed, felt like a personal
16:26
Speaker 3: attack rather than quote fair football analysis. Burley noted that
16:33
Speaker 3: Polisic is a apparently big.
16:36
Speaker 1: Time annoyed by what has been going on here.
16:39
Speaker 3: Okay, well, his feelings hurt, so the question this United
16:43
Speaker 3: States soccer headliner Christian Polisic is getting unfairly criticized by
16:49
Speaker 3: the World.
16:50
Speaker 1: Cup flop that happened.
16:53
Speaker 3: That's according to this soccer commentator thumbs up or thumbs down,
16:57
Speaker 3: thumbs up or thumbs down to this, So we are
17:00
Speaker 3: going thumbs up on this one. The criticism of Christian
17:04
Speaker 3: Polistic is absolutely fair game.
17:07
Speaker 1: And every man, woman and child knows that.
17:09
Speaker 3: Now.
17:09
Speaker 1: I don't know this Boza.
17:10
Speaker 3: I'd never heard this guy, Craig Burley or whatever his
17:13
Speaker 3: name is, Big Soccer in America. We're gonna call it
17:17
Speaker 3: that Big Soccer to America handed this guy Polisic the
17:21
Speaker 3: keys to the US soccer kingdom, and he took those
17:24
Speaker 3: keys and he parked the bus in dead neutral is
17:30
Speaker 3: what happened. Right, to borrow a line from the iconic
17:34
Speaker 3: Spider Man, with great power comes great responsibility.
17:38
Speaker 1: Polistic faced Team.
17:40
Speaker 3: USA as he when it is, as the face of
17:44
Speaker 3: two USA. He faced the world representing the red, white
17:48
Speaker 3: and blue.
17:49
Speaker 1: But you know what that means.
17:51
Speaker 3: But when he looked in the mirror, the man in
17:53
Speaker 3: the mirror must have said, try again later, bro, Try
17:56
Speaker 3: again later.
17:56
Speaker 1: Bro.
17:57
Speaker 3: And our soccer hardos are soccer hardos built this guy
18:01
Speaker 3: up as a mythical savior for American soccer and instead
18:06
Speaker 3: of providing a miracle, we got an emoji.
18:09
Speaker 1: It was the shoulder shrug emoji. That's what we got,
18:12
Speaker 1: was a shrug emoji.
18:13
Speaker 3: And dubbed and I remember they did a clip during
18:16
Speaker 3: the World Cup. I don't remember the guys that sappy
18:18
Speaker 3: reporter on Fox, the guy that does all that, he
18:20
Speaker 3: used to be at ESPN. He's like a sappy guy,
18:22
Speaker 3: does these really heartstrings emotional bull crap stories. So this
18:27
Speaker 3: guy did this whole thing about this kid who was
18:29
Speaker 3: from Pennsylvania's family moved to Europe and he became the
18:31
Speaker 3: soccer player and he whole and they played a clip
18:34
Speaker 3: where he was dubbed Captain America, America, America, Captain America. Right,
18:42
Speaker 3: he played in this World Cup more like earthworm gym
18:46
Speaker 3: with not one, not two, not three, but four red
18:49
Speaker 3: bulls and hadn't slept in about seven seventy two hours,
18:53
Speaker 3: like Jed who fled going on a on a bender
18:56
Speaker 3: and then not sleeping and all that stuff. You only
18:59
Speaker 3: get I heard this years ago. You only get one
19:01
Speaker 3: shot on the world stage. Now, Polisic's older, he's been
19:05
Speaker 3: in these big games in the past.
19:07
Speaker 1: But I'm talking about the World Cup in America.
19:11
Speaker 3: I don't know that we'll all be alive the next
19:13
Speaker 3: time the World Cup comes to America.
19:14
Speaker 1: Who knows. Maybe we will, maybe we won't.
19:17
Speaker 3: It's gonna be a while they move this thing around.
19:19
Speaker 3: It only plays every four years, so it's gonna be
19:21
Speaker 3: a long time. And it would have been amazing, right
19:25
Speaker 3: if this had happened here in America, of the USA
19:27
Speaker 3: had gotten to the final game of the World Cup,
19:29
Speaker 3: oh my god, it would have been huge.
19:30
Speaker 1: And that would have been a.
19:31
Speaker 3: Big And so he's on the big stage in America, Polisic, and.
19:35
Speaker 1: He used this stage to launch a souvenir foam finger
19:40
Speaker 1: into the stands, is what he did. And it was
19:42
Speaker 1: the middle finger.
19:44
Speaker 3: Turned pressure, a lot of pressure on Christian Polisic, and
19:48
Speaker 3: he turned into dust, not diamonds, not diamonds, dust, shrinking
19:55
Speaker 3: under that spotlight and sucking at a time you cannot suck.
19:59
Speaker 3: And so Polistic he didn't just miss the mark. He
20:01
Speaker 3: completely evaporated. And unlike this TV pundin it says it's
20:05
Speaker 3: unfair and it's not right. It's not football commentary. Yes,
20:09
Speaker 3: there are other players that fed up. The goaltender for
20:11
Speaker 3: Team USA was an embarrassment that famous defensive blunder as well. However,
20:18
Speaker 3: again go back to my Man, Spider Man and stan Lee.
20:21
Speaker 3: With great power comes great responsibility. They hyped you up
20:24
Speaker 3: and you didn't.
20:25
Speaker 1: Do what you were supposed to do.
20:26
Speaker 3: You were supposed to hypnotize the non soccer fans. Instead
20:31
Speaker 3: you gave them evidence as to why they should not
20:34
Speaker 3: watch soccer other than the World Cup. You laid it
20:37
Speaker 3: all out for them, is what you did. It is
20:39
Speaker 3: the Ben Mallor Show. If you'd like to be part
20:42
Speaker 3: eight seven seven ninety nine on Fox. That's eight seven
20:46
Speaker 3: seven ninety nine on Fox.
20:49
Speaker 1: If you want to be part of the live show,
20:51
Speaker 1: you can miss.
20:51
Speaker 3: Up on X at Ben Mahlor. That's at Ben Mahler.
20:56
Speaker 3: If you'd like to be part of the program, you
20:59
Speaker 3: can miss up that way as well. Time now for
21:01
Speaker 3: the Mallor Riddle of the day. And here's the Mallard
21:05
Speaker 3: Riddle of the day. Norwegian soccer star erlung Holland.
21:10
Speaker 1: I believe his name.
21:11
Speaker 3: I butchered his name last night, but I believe it's
21:12
Speaker 3: Erland or erlong Holland. He follows a very bizarre diet.
21:20
Speaker 3: He consumes approximately six thousand calories each day, and he
21:24
Speaker 3: recently said that blank is his magic potion.
21:29
Speaker 1: Again.
21:30
Speaker 3: The Norwegian soccer star Erlong Holland follows a very bizarre
21:36
Speaker 3: eating a planet diet, consuming approximately six thousand calories each day.
21:40
Speaker 3: He said recently that blank, though, is his magic potion.
21:44
Speaker 1: That is the mallor riddle of the day. The answer,
21:48
Speaker 1: We'll get to it and we will.
21:49
Speaker 4: Do it.
21:52
Speaker 5: Next. Be sure to catch live editions of The Ben
21:54
Speaker 5: Maller Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific
21:58
Speaker 5: on Fox Sports Radio and the iHeartRadio app.
22:02
Speaker 6: Hey, this is Jason McIntyre. Join me every weekday morning
22:06
Speaker 6: on my podcast, Straight Fire with Jason McIntyre. This isn't
22:10
Speaker 6: your typical sports pod pushing the same tired narratives down your.
22:13
Speaker 1: Throat every day.
22:14
Speaker 6: Straight Fire gives you honest opinions on all the biggest
22:18
Speaker 6: sports headlines, accurate stats to help you win big at
22:21
Speaker 6: the sportsbook, and all the best guests. Do yourself a
22:23
Speaker 6: favor and listen to Straight Fire with Jason McIntyre on
22:27
Speaker 6: the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.
22:34
Speaker 3: It is the Ben Mahlor Show. We are less than
22:37
Speaker 3: a week away from the Malor Palooza. I just checked
22:42
Speaker 3: the email and man, couple of these acts.
22:48
Speaker 1: Wow, legends. Legends have ended.
22:51
Speaker 3: Now there's always room for newbies and we'd love nubies
22:54
Speaker 3: to be part of the Mallet Palooza. It is coming
22:56
Speaker 3: up next week, that is Wednesday into Thursday. The Malard
23:01
Speaker 3: Palooza will be on the radio a special night, a
23:07
Speaker 3: magical night, So we hope that you will participate.
23:10
Speaker 1: In that and just listen it.
23:11
Speaker 3: So we have the most downloads all summer that night,
23:14
Speaker 3: so a lot of people's gonna are gonna hear live
23:17
Speaker 3: and on demand the podcast The Mallard Palosa.
23:21
Speaker 1: So it's gonna be a lot of fun.
23:22
Speaker 3: That'll be coming up this Wednesday into Thursday, so mostly Thursday,
23:27
Speaker 3: mostly Thursday, but a little little on the West Coast
23:29
Speaker 3: a little bit on Wednesday, so check that out. Meantime,
23:32
Speaker 3: on this show, you can answer bits like the Malar
23:34
Speaker 3: Riddle of the Day and other features at Ben Mahler
23:37
Speaker 3: on x you can call in at eight seven seven
23:40
Speaker 3: ninety nine on Fox. We've got Lame Jokes of the
23:42
Speaker 3: Week coming up later this hour. We'll pay off the
23:45
Speaker 3: Riddle of the Day in a moment. Lorena is here
23:49
Speaker 3: fsr tech queen done there she is, and right over
23:54
Speaker 3: there Cooper Loop a Bronco fan. That's a Bronco fan.
24:00
Speaker 3: Her comments can and we'll be used against you in
24:03
Speaker 3: the kangaroo court of the Mallard militia. So please, I
24:08
Speaker 3: beg of you to act appropriately, all right. Meanwhile, time
24:13
Speaker 3: out of payoff the Mallar Riddle of the day, and
24:17
Speaker 3: we've gone deep.
24:18
Speaker 1: Into the bag. On the malar riddle of the day.
24:21
Speaker 3: A Norwegian soccer star named erlong Holland follows a bizarre
24:27
Speaker 3: eating plant consumers approximately six thousand calories of food each day.
24:34
Speaker 1: Now.
24:34
Speaker 3: He said recently that blank is his magic potion.
24:39
Speaker 1: That's what he said.
24:40
Speaker 3: Alf the alien opine are going with De's nuts as
24:49
Speaker 3: Stevie Meatbauls says seven to ten thousand pelvic thrusts per day.
24:55
Speaker 1: A six dollars burger which is.
24:57
Speaker 3: Now, by the way, twenty dollars from for dog at
25:00
Speaker 3: Carl's Junior. I remember that six dollars burger which was
25:04
Speaker 3: like four bucks or something like.
25:05
Speaker 1: That back back in the day. What else do we have? Yeah,
25:09
Speaker 1: everything's expensive, Craig, how about five guys? That's really man?
25:13
Speaker 3: Oh my lord god, I you feel like you should
25:16
Speaker 3: be eating somewhere to Beverly Hills or something like that.
25:20
Speaker 1: I know, right. Craig is going with spinach is his answer.
25:25
Speaker 1: What do we have? A late night drug?
25:27
Speaker 3: Tester says magic potion is from the jugs truckers leave
25:32
Speaker 3: in the side of the road. Okay, a dozen deep
25:35
Speaker 3: fried oysters from Eloy from Compton. Donkey Sausage is going
25:40
Speaker 3: with wieners his answer, the Costco dog. The Costco dog
25:47
Speaker 3: that's from not a burner. There you go, how about that?
25:51
Speaker 3: What else do we have here?
25:52
Speaker 1: Wow?
25:53
Speaker 3: That is quite the story. Not real, but quite the story.
25:56
Speaker 3: Delicious corn beef from Eke in Roseville, Minnesota.
26:00
Speaker 1: More postroma guy, more pastrama guy.
26:03
Speaker 4: Uh.
26:03
Speaker 3: Kathy in Madison just re sent out a YouTube video
26:07
Speaker 3: that we're in Mallard Chicken fingers from random Ryan in Carolina,
26:11
Speaker 3: who for some reason didn't.
26:12
Speaker 1: Say look at it, making it mook it. Culver's cheese
26:16
Speaker 1: kurds from JT of the Wingman.
26:19
Speaker 3: Solid Solid Timmy from Busco Indiana said breast milk is
26:25
Speaker 3: the answer.
26:25
Speaker 1: Wow. Okay?
26:26
Speaker 3: Uh, rock Rocky Mountain oyster from Doug in South Korea.
26:31
Speaker 3: Our buddy Natron from Stockton who we've seen at the
26:34
Speaker 3: Mallard meet and greet multiple times.
26:36
Speaker 1: He drags his lady friend there. Garlic and ranch dip
26:41
Speaker 1: is the answer. What do we have here? Page down?
26:45
Speaker 3: Uh?
26:45
Speaker 1: He said.
26:46
Speaker 3: Mike the Leperkun said seafood, especially oysters, is the answer.
26:51
Speaker 3: Salad with ranch dressing from Philler Up Phil. Eileen in
26:54
Speaker 3: San Francisco went with honey as her answer. All right,
26:59
Speaker 3: do you have an answer again? This Norwegian soccer star
27:03
Speaker 3: Erlung Holland follows a very bizarre diet. He consumes approximately
27:07
Speaker 3: eight thousand or six thousand calories a day. He said
27:10
Speaker 3: recently that blank, though, is his magic potion?
27:13
Speaker 1: Rainwater? Rain water? All right?
27:16
Speaker 3: Is that correct? Survey says no, unfortunately not. Holland said
27:22
Speaker 3: his magic potion is raw milk, raw milk. Although he
27:25
Speaker 3: also eats organ meat, he loves eating liver and heart.
27:31
Speaker 3: You're eating heart, eating heart, that's right, because you're a heartbreaker.
27:35
Speaker 1: That's why you eat it. That's how you do it.
27:37
Speaker 1: But you know, like when you cook a turkey on Thanksgiving,
27:39
Speaker 1: you take all the innerds out. Yeah yeah, my friend
27:43
Speaker 1: likes to put them with salt and hot sauce.
27:45
Speaker 3: Wow, that's like Roberto who used to work on the show.
27:48
Speaker 3: He retired for the luxury career of being a bus driver.
27:50
Speaker 3: But Roberto talked about Manudo. You know what Manudo they
27:54
Speaker 3: put like diet I. I like the band back in
27:58
Speaker 3: the day, But the Manudo they put the like all
28:00
Speaker 3: the bad parts of the cow. They just throw it
28:02
Speaker 3: in there and they season it and then it's supposedly
28:06
Speaker 3: somewhat edible. Come down, Calm down, Roberto, what's wrong with you?
28:13
Speaker 1: Shame on you? All right?
28:15
Speaker 3: What's text and calls? It is a call in show.
28:17
Speaker 3: We do have coming up later this hour for your
28:19
Speaker 3: dancing and dining pleasure. We will have big bands, lame
28:23
Speaker 3: jokes all the week.
28:26
Speaker 1: He lame jokes a week. Let's go to the phones though.
28:27
Speaker 1: Right now, let's say hello to James.
28:30
Speaker 3: Not hollering James though, James in Tacoma, Hello, James, Welcome.
28:36
Speaker 1: James.
28:36
Speaker 4: So, Lorraine staer Keith clean next week? Well I got
28:40
Speaker 4: for breaking news in thirty minutes, I'm gonna clean my
28:45
Speaker 4: dentures all right about?
28:48
Speaker 1: Yeah, all right, my dad on dentures.
28:52
Speaker 5: Do you have one of those fancy pods or are
28:55
Speaker 5: you just gonna drop like one of those tablets in water.
29:00
Speaker 4: Tablet for about usually take about seven or eight hours
29:04
Speaker 4: a polodics either one.
29:06
Speaker 5: Okay, yeah, I was on a city bus.
29:11
Speaker 4: The other day where the driver found a pair of
29:14
Speaker 4: dentists to somebody left on the bus.
29:17
Speaker 1: Is that right?
29:17
Speaker 3: Those might be weed man's They might be weed man's teeth,
29:20
Speaker 3: you know.
29:21
Speaker 7: Yeah.
29:21
Speaker 1: Yeah.
29:22
Speaker 4: But the but the reason I called man is that
29:25
Speaker 4: you're doing a monologue yesterday about baseball managers who polar
29:31
Speaker 4: starters who have no hitter going.
29:34
Speaker 1: Yes.
29:34
Speaker 3: Yes, this happened twice in the last twice in the
29:36
Speaker 3: last week. The Marlins and then the Pittsburgh Pirates did
29:40
Speaker 3: it too.
29:40
Speaker 4: Yes, Well, how do you feel about managers who don't
29:44
Speaker 4: want their best hitters doing the home run derb because
29:46
Speaker 4: they're worried that the Derbyshire runners runs swing for the
29:51
Speaker 4: rest of the year.
29:53
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's it's stupid. It's dumb.
29:54
Speaker 3: It shows you that these people aren't that smart, and
29:57
Speaker 3: that's just unfortunate. I mean, it's it's it's really wild
30:00
Speaker 3: because these are supposed to be the smartest people these
30:02
Speaker 3: teams are hiring, and they're graduating from Ivy League schools.
30:06
Speaker 3: It's flawed logic. As I talked about here, James. Baseball
30:10
Speaker 3: has done research that has proven the whole pitch count
30:15
Speaker 3: limiting things on how many people. There's no correlation causation
30:20
Speaker 3: that you're gonna have more injuries. It's just humans think
30:23
Speaker 3: that is the case. It is not the case. The
30:25
Speaker 3: same thing with the home Run Derby, Like there were
30:27
Speaker 3: a few guys that didn't play well after the All
30:30
Speaker 3: Star Break who were playing well, but normally there's a
30:33
Speaker 3: regression to the mean. That's what happens. Extreme outcomes are
30:37
Speaker 3: followed by more moderate ones. So like this year, you
30:40
Speaker 3: look at the you know, the home runs, Kyle Swarber
30:43
Speaker 3: s hit a bunch of home runs with the Phillies,
30:45
Speaker 3: and I guess he's gonna be in the Home Run Derby.
30:46
Speaker 3: He's likely not going to play as well down the
30:48
Speaker 3: stretch because that's just how it works, James.
30:51
Speaker 4: It's same with bright Hander, bright Happer. They bumfer so
30:55
Speaker 4: supposed to do Derby. But John Manley's like, hope, don't
30:59
Speaker 4: get hurt.
31:02
Speaker 3: You can get hurt. You're sleeping, you can hurt yourself.
31:05
Speaker 3: It who cares? All right, good luck when you're dentist, James,
31:08
Speaker 3: good luck, all right, we're pulling for you, James, whoopee
31:13
Speaker 3: pie Blair is in the Great State of Maine. He's
31:17
Speaker 3: a TikTok star and he's in the air everywhere.
31:19
Speaker 1: Hello, whoopye pie Blair.
31:21
Speaker 7: That's why I only, I mean, I get a lot
31:24
Speaker 7: of sleep. Now, that's why I don't make it on
31:26
Speaker 7: here that much. I'm barely on kickcock now, I'm there barely.
31:31
Speaker 1: Are you growing up?
31:31
Speaker 4: Blair?
31:32
Speaker 1: Are you now? Are you working? Are you? Do you
31:34
Speaker 1: have a job? Lair? You're not with us and I don't.
31:37
Speaker 7: They're working on getting me an electric bike?
31:39
Speaker 1: Then no, really, that's great.
31:43
Speaker 3: So that means now the next time, as you know,
31:46
Speaker 3: when I go to the Northeast and I love Boston
31:48
Speaker 3: in that area, and when the next time I go
31:49
Speaker 3: to like Maine and I only go to Portland, you
31:52
Speaker 3: can take your electric bike down to Portland.
31:54
Speaker 1: How about that?
31:56
Speaker 7: Uh No, that's not for that. They're trying to make
31:59
Speaker 7: it seem like it's can be for work only. Oh,
32:02
Speaker 7: come on, I don't know that either. I'm not with
32:07
Speaker 7: that for either. But that would that would run out
32:10
Speaker 7: of juice anyways, wouldn't make it that far.
32:13
Speaker 1: Yeah, what kind of job are you going to get?
32:15
Speaker 7: Uh? I don't know. I gotta go get some applications
32:19
Speaker 7: and fill them out with Volke Rehab. You know they do.
32:23
Speaker 7: They they're the ones that fill out job application.
32:28
Speaker 1: You got a girlfriend. What's going on?
32:31
Speaker 7: I have concerts to go to you tonight?
32:34
Speaker 4: Oh?
32:34
Speaker 5: Yeah?
32:34
Speaker 1: Who's who's performing?
32:37
Speaker 7: Ones called Adam Babcock is starting off for the Schizzle,
32:42
Speaker 7: My Nozzle, my Misle, my dig Wow, yeah called it's
32:49
Speaker 7: called They're called the Paul, They're called the Diggle or whatever.
32:55
Speaker 7: I don't know, I've heard of them. They're like a
32:57
Speaker 7: rap kind.
32:58
Speaker 1: Of banda you think kind of.
33:03
Speaker 7: They're gonna play out doors at seven pm. They're supposed
33:06
Speaker 7: to start like eight thirty because the one that's coming
33:10
Speaker 7: on board at seven, which is Adam Babcock really good.
33:14
Speaker 4: Really good, really good.
33:15
Speaker 1: Big.
33:16
Speaker 7: You're doing some uh some videoing of the tonight's gigs,
33:22
Speaker 7: So okay.
33:24
Speaker 3: We'd like to announce that's big, big news, big news
33:28
Speaker 3: we will have.
33:28
Speaker 1: This is very exciting.
33:30
Speaker 3: Blair will be videoing from a concert of rappers in Maine,
33:34
Speaker 3: in central Maine. And will you be participating Blair in
33:37
Speaker 3: the Mallard Palooza? Are you going to enter the big
33:40
Speaker 3: show that we're having next week Wednesday?
33:44
Speaker 1: Into Thursday.
33:44
Speaker 3: So a week from now we're gonna have this. Uh
33:47
Speaker 3: I guess, I guess less than a week now, six
33:49
Speaker 3: days from now?
33:50
Speaker 1: Are you going to enter?
33:52
Speaker 4: Hell?
33:52
Speaker 7: Yeah, Ben, I will do that. Do I need to eat?
33:56
Speaker 1: Yeah? Email me Ben Maler Shows. Email. What are you
33:58
Speaker 1: gonna do?
33:59
Speaker 3: Are you gonna do a comedy? Are you gonna do
34:01
Speaker 3: a song? What are you gonna do?
34:03
Speaker 7: I'll come up with something.
34:05
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, listen, you know what you're you're such
34:08
Speaker 1: a big name. Let me tell you something. You're an entertainer.
34:11
Speaker 1: You are an entertainer, and.
34:12
Speaker 3: So I am going to allow you to come up
34:14
Speaker 3: with whatever you want, whatever you want to do, and
34:18
Speaker 3: I will leave a slot.
34:18
Speaker 1: Now, what hour do you want to be on the
34:20
Speaker 1: Mallard Palooz.
34:24
Speaker 7: I'll work on it whenever. I mean you are, just.
34:27
Speaker 3: Email me, Email me at time, Blair and we're doing
34:31
Speaker 3: this live on the air now, okay, yes, on the
34:34
Speaker 3: website Ben Maler Show at gmail dot com. Just the
34:37
Speaker 3: name of the show at gmail dot com. At gmail dot.
34:40
Speaker 7: Email me and I'll get up hit up with what's
34:45
Speaker 7: his name?
34:46
Speaker 1: Okay? All right, all right, very good, send it out.
34:50
Speaker 3: I understand, okay, all right, buddy, Well, thank you, Blair,
34:55
Speaker 3: all right, go away. Uh, there he goes our friend Blair.
34:59
Speaker 3: H chances that Blair actually remembers to enter the Mallard
35:02
Speaker 3: Palooza less uh scale of one to ten minus nine hundred.
35:08
Speaker 1: There is no chance he will be part of that.
35:10
Speaker 3: He's already in fact, I would say, Coop forgotten that
35:13
Speaker 3: he just agreed to be part of it.
35:14
Speaker 1: Yes, I think so, probably all right, Yeah, I'd love
35:22
Speaker 1: for him to be part of it. Never mind he
35:23
Speaker 1: hung up. Of course, he already hung up.
35:26
Speaker 3: Yeah, he has no chance that he's going to be
35:28
Speaker 3: part of this Mallard Paluza. Is the Ben Maller Show.
35:32
Speaker 3: We got Big Ben's lame jokes all the week for
35:34
Speaker 3: the rest of the hour, and settle in. Get your
35:39
Speaker 3: funny bone, find your funny bone. Big Ben's lame jokes.
35:42
Speaker 1: Of the week. We'll get to that, and we will
35:45
Speaker 1: do it next.
35:48
Speaker 5: Be sure to catch live editions of The Ben Maller
35:50
Speaker 5: Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific.
35:53
Speaker 3: It is the Ben Mallard Show, The Ben Mahler Show. I,
35:58
Speaker 3: of course Bill Miller reminding you that you are never
36:02
Speaker 3: far away from the Ben Mauser. Some of you idiots
36:04
Speaker 3: don't listen. The other night we were covered up by
36:06
Speaker 3: some soccer game on one of the big homes of
36:09
Speaker 3: this show, and a number of you said.
36:12
Speaker 1: I can't find your show.
36:12
Speaker 3: Oh my god, you panicked, your big dummy. Listen the
36:17
Speaker 3: iHeartRadio app. You can hear the show on the Fox
36:21
Speaker 3: Sports Radio channel at all times.
36:23
Speaker 1: Never ever covered up on the iHeartRadio app, So make
36:26
Speaker 1: sure to have that at least as a backup. I
36:28
Speaker 1: know you like what you listen to. I get it.
36:30
Speaker 3: Do you have the iHeart Radio app, Fox Sports Radio
36:32
Speaker 3: Channel live and local in your ear drums all night?
36:35
Speaker 3: You also hear the Ben Malor Show podcast and the
36:37
Speaker 3: Fifth Hour podcast. Yeah, a new episode will drop later today.
36:42
Speaker 3: Very exciting.
36:43
Speaker 1: I think. Well, I think I'm gonna do a Mallard
36:46
Speaker 1: travel type log thing. We haven't done one of those
36:48
Speaker 1: in a while, so I have that for you coming
36:49
Speaker 1: up later today. Check it out.
36:50
Speaker 3: Ben Malor Show podcast, iHeartRadio app listen live on.
36:53
Speaker 1: The Fox Sports Radio channel. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.
36:55
Speaker 5: That game Knock Knock, Who's there? Blame we blame we too.
37:02
Speaker 1: It's Big Man's lame joke of the week.
37:05
Speaker 3: That is, these are actual jokes sending by actual human beings,
37:09
Speaker 3: guaranteed human guaranteed him.
37:12
Speaker 1: But do we have weed Man's weed Man there? Yes?
37:15
Speaker 1: All right, it's very exciting here, weed Man Hippie.
37:20
Speaker 7: Thank you?
37:20
Speaker 4: All right? All right?
37:24
Speaker 1: Why were you late? Weed Man? What happened? I'm here,
37:29
Speaker 1: I know, but you were a little late, you know,
37:31
Speaker 1: a little.
37:32
Speaker 4: I'm here, so I'm raised jokes.
37:35
Speaker 1: I feel I feel like you're not into it. I
37:37
Speaker 1: feel like you're distracted. I feel like you're annoyed. All right?
37:44
Speaker 3: Why does weed Man actual jokes by actual listeners? Why
37:46
Speaker 3: does weed Man hate gardeners? Why they take away all
37:50
Speaker 3: the weeds? That's Mike Michael Africa. Well did you hear
37:56
Speaker 3: that weed Man Hippie was named the new CEO of
37:58
Speaker 3: Toys r US except you want to rename it.
38:03
Speaker 1: Can you believe that you're gonna rename Toys r US?
38:06
Speaker 6: What?
38:06
Speaker 3: Yeah, the new name is gonna be Bums r US.
38:09
Speaker 3: That's John in Youngstown, Ohio. Why did Weedman Hippie almost drown?
38:16
Speaker 3: Why because he was too far out?
38:19
Speaker 4: Man?
38:20
Speaker 1: That's Darryl in the Ozarks. Have you ever been to
38:24
Speaker 1: the Ozarks? You ever been there?
38:26
Speaker 4: No?
38:27
Speaker 1: No, I'm not either it looks beautiful. I've never been.
38:29
Speaker 3: Why Why was weed Man upset when America started recycling
38:34
Speaker 3: cardboard boxes?
38:35
Speaker 7: Why?
38:37
Speaker 3: Two words housing shortage. That's Brendan from Boston. What is
38:45
Speaker 3: the only school weed Man Hippie ever attended?
38:49
Speaker 1: What high school?
38:51
Speaker 3: You love the highsnown unknown caller sent that one in.
38:56
Speaker 3: If you want to send jokes in Ben Maler Show
38:58
Speaker 3: at gmail dot com, put jokes in the lines short
39:00
Speaker 3: gmail dot com.
39:02
Speaker 1: How many shots of tequila can weed Man do?
39:05
Speaker 7: How many?
39:06
Speaker 1: One shot? Two shot? Three shots?
39:08
Speaker 4: Floor?
39:12
Speaker 3: I hope Todd's going to be in the mallet palooza.
39:15
Speaker 3: I don't know if he is or not, but that's
39:16
Speaker 3: coming up, Todd. I've not got an email from you
39:18
Speaker 3: saying you want to be part of it. Why did
39:20
Speaker 3: weed Man decide to become a car salesman?
39:23
Speaker 7: Why?
39:24
Speaker 1: Well, he's a fan of high pressure sales. She loves it. Well,
39:31
Speaker 1: interesting story here.
39:33
Speaker 3: Did you hear that weed Man and Mike the Leprechaun
39:35
Speaker 3: are creating a new cereal?
39:38
Speaker 4: Wow?
39:38
Speaker 5: Cool?
39:39
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's called Unlucky Charms is what it's called? Relations
39:45
Speaker 3: on that they're very excited. Uh, what do you feed
39:48
Speaker 3: the mouse that has weed Man's teeth. What government cheese baby?
39:59
Speaker 5: Why?
40:00
Speaker 3: What did weed Man Hippie do after telling terrible jokes
40:03
Speaker 3: about candy?
40:04
Speaker 1: What he snickered? All right?
40:07
Speaker 3: What is the what's the what's what's the difference between
40:12
Speaker 3: weed man socks and a camera and his camera? What
40:16
Speaker 3: his socks take five toes and his camera only takes photoes.
40:20
Speaker 1: That's nine oh four ray weed Man. That rugby bys
40:25
Speaker 1: beg God, weed Man hippy