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What Happens When You Work For a Narcissist? · The Mental Healness Podcast

• 0:00
  Narcissistic bosses. That's what we're talking about
• 0:03
  today, y'all? I've been watching the Titan X
• 0:08
  submersible thing on Netflix, and that boss Stockton Rush was
• 0:13
  the epitome, the epitome of a narcissistic person.
• 0:18
  Yeah, I'm just look, I'm just keeping it hot and ready.
• 0:21
  I look, look, look. I don't even look.
• 0:23
  I saw that right there. I was like, I got to do a video
• 0:26
  about narcissistic bosses. If you're new here, my name is
• 0:28
  Lee Hammock. I'm a diagnosed narcissist
• 0:30
  myself and I'll give you an inside look at the mind of a
• 0:32
  narcissist and that documentary right there, it's called Titan,
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  the ocean gate submersible disaster on Netflix.
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  Go watch it. And a lot of y'all have been
• 0:42
  asking me to do longer, more in depth videos about narcissistic
• 0:45
  bosses and that right there. If you want to see how what it's
• 0:47
  like to work for a toxic, manipulative, psychopathic boss,
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  go watch that video right there. I'm just telling you because if
• 0:55
  you have one in your life, if you've worked for one or you
• 0:58
  could work for one in the future, that type of stuff can
• 1:00
  prepare you for that. Because when you work for a boss
• 1:04
  like that, I'm not going to say narcissistic boss, y'all, that's
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  too many syllables. Narcissistic boss, that's five
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  syllables every time I have to say that.
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  So I'm going to say NB, OK, from this point for I'm going to say
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  NB. So when you work for an NB, it's
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  going to be very difficult for you to reach your full
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  potential. I'm just, look, I'm just keeping
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  it high. If you have an NB, they will
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  absolutely want to take credit for all the good things that you
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  produce, all the good things that come from you, that that
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  come from your mind. They're going to try and take
• 1:38
  credit for them because this is how the mind of a narcissistic
• 1:41
  person works. An NB they feel like they want
• 1:44
  all the credit, but none, NONE of the blame.
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  I know, I know that probably resonated with a lot of y'all
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  right there when I said that because they will take credit
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  for every single good thing that comes from the company, you know
• 2:02
  as as some of them should, right?
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  They hired you, they put you in a position, right?
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  They believed in you to get you the job, blah, blah, blah,
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  right? Some of them should, but some of
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  them don't hire you. They have no in they have no
• 2:14
  nothing to do with how you got there in the 1st place.
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  But as soon as you do something good, they take credit for it,
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  right? They don't want your name on
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  anything. The look, it's like they want an
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  A they they get an A on a project and they didn't have
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  work on it. It's very difficult to work
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  under these circumstances because an NB like Stockton Rush
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  will ruin they like it's hard to work for somebody like that
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  because they all it's got like they always got their thumb on
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  you. They micro and macromanaged
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  people, right? Some of them do, some of them do
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  one or the other, but a lot of NBS will both micro and micro
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  and macro manager. They're in every aspect of your
• 2:56
  life, every aspect of it. Like Willie, how the hell do we
• 3:00
  know the job is going to have a narcissistic boss or
• 3:04
  narcissistic culture just overall?
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  Like how, how do we even know that?
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  Like listen for these, some of these companies, right?
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  They say they they their workplace is like a family lady.
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  I was just feel like that right there is a red flag that you
• 3:19
  could be walking into a situation with an NB or just a
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  narcissistic culture, right? Because when they say this is
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  this workplace is like a family, they mean you're going to spend
• 3:30
  most of your time here and you're going to treat this like
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  you're going to put this above your real family.
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  I know they say like a family, but they mean like your family,
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  your only family, your main family.
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  So if you see somebody talking about the this a family culture,
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  we family, family, family, family, family, blamly, blamly,
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  blamly, blamly blamly. They try to sell you on that
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  point right there. Ask yourself why there's such a
• 3:51
  like the turnover rate is so high and whatnot, right?
• 3:54
  Why the job open in the 1st place?
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  Be like, I feel like you have to ask these type of questions
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  because if you don't, you're going to be in for a rude
• 4:01
  awakening when you find out why later on.
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  Of course, a lot of these narcissistic bosses, these NBS
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  could be deceptive at 1st and lie to you about why the job
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  opening is there or lie to you about the culture.
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  Lie to you about what to expect just to get you to accept the
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  job because you might come from a, you know, a highly accredited
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  university or something like that.
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  Like they might lie to you, but when you get there, I'm just
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  telling you when you are dealing with somebody like this, when
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  you get there and you try to like that's not even necessarily
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  hold them accountable when you try to point out a flaw in the
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  company or something that can make the company better or the
• 4:41
  situation better. And NB takes that as a personal
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  attack. Just like, just like in the the
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  Ocean Gate documentary, Stockton Rush, every time somebody took,
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  every time somebody spoke about the company, he took it as a
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  personal attack. Everybody, every time somebody
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  said, hey, this thing that the the submersible has cracks in
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  it. He made it sound like you
• 5:03
  talking about his Mama, right? He made it feel like you were
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  talking about his Mama. He would find a way to ostracize
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  you, to excommunicate you from emails to subtly get the board
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  to vote you out and get you fired and whatnot.
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  He was absolutely a menace. He absolutely is a menace.
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  He really, really is. And like I said, narcissistic
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  bosses and envy will take any type of constructive criticism
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  as a personal criticism. They think that because you were
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  doing, because things are going this way, because things that
• 5:40
  went this way, that whatever is going on is your fault, right?
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  They will put it on to you. They were just like, well,
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  everything was fine till you started working here.
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  Everything was going, everything was flowing smoothly until you
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  came into the picture. They will put it on you.
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  So you have to be prepared for that type of stuff to happen.
• 5:59
  If you work for somebody like this, if you've been working for
• 6:01
  somebody like this, you kind of have to stay out of the way,
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  right? You want to stay in there.
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  Like if you have an NB, you want to stay in their line of sight,
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  but you don't want to be in the in the space right there.
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  You want to stay in their line of sight, but you want to be in
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  their peripherals. You don't want their focus to be
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  completely on you. You want to be right here.
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  You see, right here is my my screen right here.
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  I have like the the little viewfinder so I can see make
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  sure I'm in the screen. I'm looking at the viewfinder
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  right now. I'm looking at you.
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  You want to be the viewfinder, right?
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  I know it's there. I see it's there.
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  It's how I know how much, how much long I need to record the
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  video for, right? And so how much like I know it's
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  there, I'm looking directly at the camera right here.
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  You see, you want to be in the peripherals, you want to be in
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  their sight line because that's how you get promoted.
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  That's how you get, you know, that's how you get promotions.
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  That's how you get, you know, recognitions and awards and
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  things like that. But you don't want their focus
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  to be on you because if their focus is on you, it typically
• 7:00
  isn't a good thing. If their focus is completely on
• 7:03
  you, if they go from like this to like this, that means that
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  you're in their line of sight, which means, well, typically
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  means there's something going on there, right?
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  It typically means that there's something going on in this space
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  right here. There's something going on with
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  how this situation has been read.
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  Like they're going to blame you for something or they look at
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  you as competition. They look at you and like they
• 7:26
  thank you trying to replace them.
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  And that very rarely, if ever works out for anybody in this
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  scenario, right? Very rarely if ever works out
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  for anyone in this situation. So if you're dealing with a
• 7:39
  narcissistic person that that is your boss, you might like I
• 7:43
  said, stay to the side. You always have to log out.
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  And this is I think y'all can get the point.
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  I don't even feel comfortable saying this sometimes right?
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  Because why should we have to appease people like this?
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  They think like this, they act like this, they behave like
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  this. Why should we have to do that,
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  right? Why should you have to do that
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  to just survive at a job? Why the hell do you have?
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  Why is it necessary for you even even have to think this way,
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  right? Why is that a necessity?
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  So with that being said, it kind of flows like this.
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  Think of the narcissistic person, right?
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  You want to, you have to appease their ego.
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  If you get in their way, they're going to try to Swatch you,
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  right? They're going to try to attack
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  you. If you don't, if you're not
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  appeasing their ego, if you're not praising them, they think
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  you're trying to attack them, right?
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  If you're not praising me, you're attacking me.
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  And if you're attacking me, you need to go.
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  If you're attacking me, I might not fire you outright because
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  sometimes you can, You can bring a lawsuit against them, right?
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  So you have an NB that wants to get rid of you, but that doesn't
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  want you to fight or doesn't want to fight you all right out,
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  doesn't want to fire you outright.
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  They can do to reverse this card.
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  Just like in a relationship, they will start making their
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  work environment so bad, so toxic that you want to quit.
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  This is what Stockton Rush did a lot of times.
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  He made people quit. There was just like he, he made
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  the work environment so bad, so hectic, so toxic that people had
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  to quit as opposed to getting fired, as opposed to him firing
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  him, right? So many people quit as well.
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  They stepped away because they knew that they, they wouldn't
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  make a difference in whatever they said or whatever they did.
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  So he made the environment so bad sometimes, like your
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  narcissistic boss could like make the environment so bad, so
• 9:28
  toxic that you just want to walk away, that you just want to take
• 9:31
  your pride. And just like, I'm gone, put my
• 9:34
  two weeks notice. I'm hey, I'm putting my two
• 9:35
  weeks notice in and they fire you the next day, right?
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  They're ready for you to go. That's how, that's how sometimes
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  you know, they're ready for you to go.
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  You put your two weeks notice in and you get fired the same day
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  or the next day. Like, well, you, we'll accept
• 9:48
  your resignation for today. It's good.
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  It's good for the it's good for today.
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  You ain't got to wait two weeks. Bye.
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  You see, that happens. But I always, I always tell
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  people you, if you have an NB, make sure you look up all work
• 10:01
  related laws in your state or you have a, you, if you can
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  afford one, get an attorney and talk to them about, talk to them
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  about the toxic work environment to see if you have a case or
• 10:09
  anything like that, or to see how to navigate leaving the
• 10:12
  company in the easiest, most efficient way possible.
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  Because think about this. If this company is your first
• 10:18
  job or your main job that you've had for years and then you have
• 10:21
  a narcissistic boss, you try to get another job later on,
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  they're going to make it difficult because they're are,
• 10:26
  are they, are they going to be willing to give you a reference?
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  You see what I'm saying? Are they going to be willing to
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  give you a reference for your next employer based on what's
• 10:34
  happened here? Think about it like that.
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  Think about how that goes right there.
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  Like this person has like has your future in their hands too.
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  So you can't, you don't want to cuss them out and leave on bad
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  terms because now the references are not going to be referencing,
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  right? Your references will not be
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  referencing, referencing, referencing, referencing.
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  Yeah, there you go. I confuse myself trying to be
• 10:55
  funny. I can't do that like that.
• 10:57
  But NBS make your life harder. You have to stay out of that
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  way. I'm just telling you.
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  And NBS typically surround themselves with yes men and
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  sometimes the yes men or the yes women.
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  The yes people are also narcissistic themselves.
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  So sometimes you get an NB who's a higher up, who's the CEO, the
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  owner of the company that has some people around them or right
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  beneath them on a hierarchy that are also narcissistic
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  themselves. So they, they carry out the
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  bidding of the narcissist of the NB, right?
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  The the narcissistic CEO has a narcissistic manager underneath
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  them that is one of their biggest supporters or their fly
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  monkeys. And they do the bidding of the
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  narcissist, they do the bidding of the NB.
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  So it's not just one sometimes you have to worry about, it's
• 11:43
  the whole company, it's the culture.
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  It's like I said, sometimes they surround themselves with them.
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  So it can be very difficult to navigate that and find your way
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  out of it. So having an envy is a very
• 11:54
  tough situation. If you want to go deep into
• 11:55
  detail. I'm just going to watch that
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  ocean gate submersiful disaster because Stockton rush like
• 12:01
  nobody could tell him what to do.
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  He was never wrong. Even though even when he was,
• 12:05
  even if he was completely wrong and if things were literally
• 12:08
  blowing up in his face and cracking in his face, he would
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  still find some way to blame somebody else.
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  Like he said we should have found like he fired one guy
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  because he said they said we should have found a crack.
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  They you you should have found this crack.
• 12:21
  I told you about the crack. I put the crack in the report.
• 12:24
  Well I didn't see it by what? Literally it's crazy.
• 12:29
  Go watch that documentary because like it's hard working
• 12:31
  for a psychopathic boss and people were afraid to say
• 12:34
  something until they made sure that he was UN alive until he
• 12:36
  passed away. That implosion.
• 12:38
  People were afraid to come out and talk about it because he
• 12:40
  said he wouldn't mind spending $50,000 to ruin somebody's life.
• 12:44
  He's like, well, I wouldn't say $50,000 is nothing to ruin your
• 12:46
  life. Just so you know, for you say
• 12:48
  anything for you go popping off outside here, running your pipe,
• 12:51
  running your peephole. Make sure make sure that you
• 12:56
  know, I got I got 50K on your head on your on your employment
• 13:00
  history or not your employment future.
• 13:03
  So anyway, I think I'm tuning in.
• 13:05
  Click one of these on the screen to watch another video on my
• 13:08
  channel. Hit that subscribe button and
• 13:09
  also check out Mental illness.net for my coaching, my
• 13:12
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• 13:14
  If you're my podcast, hit that subscribe button too.
• 13:16
  I'm out. Peace.