Latest / High n' Dry Podcast / Episode 14. The Purge & Sherlock Holmes vs. Bigfoot (Feat. Luke Theede)

Transcript

Episode 14. The Purge & Sherlock Holmes vs. Bigfoot (Feat. Luke Theede) · High n' Dry Podcast

• 0:20
  SPEAKER_02: Beautiful.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_01: Alright, welcome to High and Dry.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_01: I'm Ryan Barron North, Resident Drunken Philosopher.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_01: With me as always, James Crosslin, Resident High Philosopher.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_01: How you doing, James?
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_03: I'm doing great.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_03: This is a great day to smoke weed and talk about some bullshit with my friends.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_01: No, I'm excited for it too.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_01: I'm excited for it too.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_01: Today, joining us as Guest High Philosopher.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_01: Uh we have a brand new guest, really excited here.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_01: We have Facebook streamer and hippie, Luke Thede.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_01: How you doing, Luke?
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_01: Good, good.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_01: How are you guys doing?
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_01: Good, good.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_01: We're excited today.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_01: It's great to have you on the show.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I'm excited.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_03: I'm excited for the topics that we're speaking about.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_03: I think it's gonna be a good time.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_03: This is gonna be good.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_03: We have a good one today for sure.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, this is gonna be good.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_01: This is gonna be good.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_01: I'm even excited about the first part.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_01: So uh for our new guest and for those of you just joining us over here on High and Dry, um, our show starts with a moral quandary, a little philosophical question, and then we move into a fist fight as these things often shake out.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_01: Before we do that on High and Dry, what sets us apart from the Oprah Winfrey show is we get drunk and high.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_01: So to get this started, James, what are you smoking?
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_03: I am smoking uh a wonderful strain called Viper City.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_03: And uh honestly, with our new guest, I if if Viper City existed in any place, it would be Florida.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_03: 100% Viper City.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_03: That sounds like a Florida strain.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_03: Sounds like in the woods.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_03: Viper City, Florida.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_03: You go there to get the best weed and also bitten by snakes.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_03: And uh so Luke, what are you smoking?
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_03: I'm actually smoking a strain called grape soda, and uh it's been very nice, very nice.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_03: Very it's a sativa, so it's been uh it's just been a nice, nice, productive high.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, good.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_03: Finally, we'll have someone productive on this podcast to get some work done.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_01: And uh me, I'm gonna still be working on this bottle of primrose gin.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_01: Uh primrose, it's a favorite from the past couple episodes, leads to some of the most ridiculous conversations.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_01: So here we go.
• 2:33
  SPEAKER_01: So this first one to uh Carl Urban and to our new guest, Luke.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_03: Next time we'll get it with the guest first, but also Carl Urban's fantastic.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_03: Carl Urban, um, Luke second.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, got it.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_01: Just so you know where you stand.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_03: Cheers, boys.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_03: Cheers.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_03: Cheers.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, yeah, that's nice.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it gets easier every time.
• 3:00
  SPEAKER_03: Nice and smooth.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_03: So uh so Luke, why don't you tell some of our uh some of our listeners what what kinds of stuff you stream on Facebook?
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_03: Um, so I'm actually like uh it's it's a new stream that I'm recently starting.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_03: So um basically what it is is it's uh a live stream, but it's gonna be kind of an interview style.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_03: So um we'll have three interviews every stream, hour-long interviews, and it'll be on different topics, like anything, you know, um, like for example, traveling to physical therapy to things like that.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_03: But then we're also gonna be playing any video game that the um guests might want to play.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_03: So Fall Guys, uh Rocket League, things like that.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_03: So that sounds awesome, man.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I think I think it'll be I think it'll be a lot of fun, and I think it'll be like kind of cool information to learn at the end of the day.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_03: So um definitely it'll be I think it'll be a very interesting thing.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_03: So I think 2021, we're really starting to kick it off this month.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_03: So we we're hoping to go live, you know, by January 21st.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_03: So definitely um check us out, it'll be awesome.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, keep an eye out, listeners, for sure.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you definitely got a you got a follower with High and Dry.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and James and myself.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_01: We're actually uh big on the Rocket League, and like everything we do, we do it drunk and high.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_03: Well, at some point we're gonna have to have uh you guys on, and that'll that'll be a good one.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_03: We'll pull we'll do Rocket League and have a good stream.
• 4:24
  SPEAKER_03: I think that'll be a fun time.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_03: Definitely, that'll be awesome.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_03: So the second shot goes to cross promotion.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_01: Here's the cross promotion, everybody.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_01: I appreciate it, guys.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_01: I appreciate it.
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_03: We appreciate it.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_03: This podcast would not be the same without guests.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_03: We tried it for a while and it was it was fun, but guests, guests really make it.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_03: Definitely.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_03: It's that it's that it's that third dynamic that you know you can play off of, which is always which is always nice.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_03: A wild card.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, we get a wild card.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_01: What is he gonna say today?
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_01: I know what James is gonna say.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_01: James knows what I'm gonna say.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_00: Woo!
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_01: And that's how it works out.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_01: Alright, so round three.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_01: Guest, you got anything you'd like to to propose a toast to?
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_03: I'd like to propose a toast to a new year and the opportunity to start anew, if you would like, and just to grasp it by the balls and take this year for what it is, and uh what it is is a new opportunity to have a good year.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_01: Let's do it.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_01: That's good.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_01: Here's to that.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_03: That was a that was a small one for me.
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna take a little extra.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, who who can only do three dabs?
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_03: They're like Pringles, you just can't stop dabbing.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_03: And then before you know it, you fall asleep.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_03: You're floating.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_01: I just realized there's no chaser at my desk.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_01: There's no nothing here to deal with.
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_03: You sit there and deal with it, yeah.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_01: But I'm just like, I wasn't even looking for one.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_01: It was just all right, time to do my draft.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, enjoy the burn.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, just let it go down.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_01: No, we've been we've been documenting on this podcast my slow evolution into a hard-boiled noir detective.
• 6:22
  unknown: We're getting there.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_01: You know, where I just no issues take down alcohol and lament the loss of a loved one.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, people are just gonna look at you and just be like with awe, just like, oh my god.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_01: That guy's got some demons.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_01: Not just podcasts.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_01: So now that we got the fun stuff out of the way, let's get into more fun stuff.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_01: Let's all get to press for the first time.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_01: So, in in honor of the moving on to something new, leaving the old world behind, um, on today's episode, the high and dry crew is gonna be doing some purging.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_01: So, for the question that I am posing to you guys today, um 2020 was so terrible, and it had nothing to do with totally predictable series of events that you know are completely unrelated to a year.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_01: But uh 2020's over, it was terrible.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_01: The powers that be have decided that the people need one night to do whatever the hell they want, with the exception of Top of the Government, because that's just not what the podcast is going into.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_02: Well, there goes my answer.
• 7:37
  SPEAKER_01: My question to you guys is on Purge Night, what do you do?
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_01: Starting guests first, Luke, what do you do?
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_03: I have to say, I'd have to take the opportunity to become financially free.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_03: So I would rob a bank, I would do something crazy to an uh a large corporation to get a lot of money to uh smaller people or and and myself.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_01: So you get a Robin Hood thing going on?
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, for sure.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_03: Pretty cool.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_03: And I have a bow, so I I mean I'm more thinking I I could do like a green arrow type of deal.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_03: Like I think I can I could rock it.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_01: No, I like no, and if you just get like some pointed shoes, some pointed leather shoes, you'll be good to go.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_01: I like it, I like it.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_03: James, what do you what do you about you?
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_03: This is a tough question.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_03: So I think I would uh I think I would I would hope that I'd do something similar to a Robin Hood type deal.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_03: The financial freedom sounds real nice, but there's also a bunch of people out there who are going to be like they're going to be really violent and they're going to have all these like horrible prejudices in the way they approach this night.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_01: Are are you suggesting that you'll be some sort of street defender?
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_03: I am su no, actually, I wasn't even thinking like a street defender.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_03: I was thinking of like a uh almost a terminator of other purgers.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_03: That's what I would want to do.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_03: Is like I would specifically go after purgers.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_01: So see that, and that's I I wish there was more of that in the movies at least.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_01: Well, there are some things with the movies that I don't like think would be there's like the writers of the purge are under the con they under the idea that as soon as we can, we're just gonna start killing each other.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_01: And and there's no there's no there's no sex crimes.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_01: There's no nucle nuclear uh stealing nuclear bombs.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I want to see Purge 8 or whatever it is, where the dude just takes the opportunity to get his deck done without a permit.
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_03: Like a super nice deck pool, like it just absolutely and the government can't say anything.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I don't have to put shit in my window.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I I just I think that that is too overlooked.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_01: Like there's just this concept that, and honestly, I think it's classist that as soon as we have a chance, we just start slaughtering each other.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_03: That's only the rich would do that.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_03: Only they're only the people who already had entitlement who hate that other people encroached on that entitlement instead of having to have needed to rely on their fellow person for their lives.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_03: Like, those are the people who start killing, and I'd be out there, I'd be like, oh, someone start fucking trying to kill someone.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_03: I dare you! I fucking dare you.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I like I still want to see that guy who's like, you know what?
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_01: I've been working on this koozie that I'm gonna put into my porch, and uh the permits are just killing me.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_03: Um so you know, I'm gonna and and and until someone until someone violent uh started going out there, I would feed the homeless because that shit's illegal.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_03: And if I get to break any laws, I'm gonna go out there, I'm gonna feed, I'm gonna feed some hungry people without getting arrested.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, just all the dumb little laws that you like normally can't do, just like just jaywalking across the streets.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna skateboard through the mall.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_03: What are you gonna do about it?
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_01: What do you gonna do?
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_01: What are you gonna do?
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I'd be willing to bet there would be so much more um indecent exposure than shown in the purge films.
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_01: Like, hey, you family chilling at the restaurant, check the helicopter.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_03: Oh like yeah, I I don't think it's it's all a grand scheme.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_03: Like, like it doesn't like that's how the purge portrays it, and obviously that's stating, but like it could be simple things like me just going golfing, like without paying.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, no, how about you fuck yourself?
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, go fuck yourself.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_03: I'm golfing.
• 11:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, oh yeah, no, like you know what?
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna actually dine at this red lobster for free.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, no, I see a lot of good people getting fucked, but at the same time, like so you know, like Christmas comes around and the holidays, and you still got dudes having to roll into Best Buy.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_01: Do you think you still have to work on Purge Night?
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_01: I don't think they could make you work on Purge Knight.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, they can't make you.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, like Yeah, they can't make you.
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I mean, yo, if you don't work on Purge Night, we'll fire you on not purge night.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_03: Well, they could fire you on purge night, too.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_03: They could do anything.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_03: I guess that's the yeah, like work or we'll fire you on purge night.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_03: We don't care.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_03: Nothing's yeah, we can do whatever we want.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_03: We'll fire you on purge night.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_03: Jesus Christ.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_01: There's there's a lot of shit that the purge night.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_03: This world sounds terrible.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_03: This really does.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_03: This purge the purge is not a good thing.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_03: It goes way deeper.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it goes so much deeper.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_03: Nobody want the purge, please.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_01: Now now can I so then the other question is can I charge someone for like I can't charge someone for something they did on purge, but like if someone steals my car the day the next day, can I call to get my car back?
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_03: I feel like no, I assume I assume they're I assume they're in possession.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_03: I assume insurance companies start putting it in their freaking you know, terms and conditions like purge night does not include in your insurance policy.
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my god.
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, see, purge is quickly turning into a terrible idea.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_03: It's because of I don't know, has money ever made something terrible before?
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_03: I can't remember.
• 13:14
  SPEAKER_03: I can't think of a single time historically.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_03: Um money or too much power has ever corrupted anything.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, no, it's only led to good things, only good things all the time.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_01: Um, but uh Ben just bringing it back, uh for my purge evening, I don't have this overwhelming urge to kill anybody.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_01: That's good.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_01: I I don't have a need to expose myself to a family at a restaurant.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_01: Um see that's number two on my list for sure.
• 13:48
  SPEAKER_01: For sure.
• 13:49
  SPEAKER_03: Just to see the look of horror as this child's innocence is robbed.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_03: Hey, you didn't you didn't say a family with a child, it could be it could be an elderly family.
• 13:59
  SPEAKER_03: First thing was Robin Hood to the poor.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm still going to bring it back that I want to be Robin Hood, sans Robin Hood, I'm exposing myself to a family of death.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_03: I may do some questionable things.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_01: Um no, but um, so I it's come up a few times um about my desire for a cult of blade-wielding assassins.
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_01: Um, but I I fear that that goes into the political spectrum and uh no longer works in the realm of the world.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_03: Like the League of League of Shadows.
• 14:41
  SPEAKER_03: Listen, we're gonna get we're gonna get banned.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_02: The people are getting kind of serious about political assassinations.
• 14:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, no, well, I was more thinking of Assassin's Creed from Ubisoft, where on Purge Night I go to war with the Knights Templar, who are trying to install order while I'm trying to maintain you know personal freedom.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_01: Um so on Purge Night, while you're exposing yourself at a Denny's, I'm gonna wage holy war against the Knights Templar.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_00: Perfect.
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_01: It takes all sorts to make the world.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_01: It's a heads and tails type of thing.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_01: It's two sides of a coin.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_01: We're the same sides of the coin.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_01: Exposing yourself into Denny's, fighting the next temples.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_01: Basically the same thing.
• 15:30
  SPEAKER_01: And that's you know, that's really what the crusades were all about, really.
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I think they were looking at the city.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_01: The white Englishman's right to show his dick at a Denny's.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_01: Um, so uh before we wrap it up, I'm gonna bring it back to our guest.
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_01: Uh Luke, final thoughts on the topic.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_01: Your purge night.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_01: What are your final thoughts?
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_01: How did it go?
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, it went killer.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_03: I was able to get millions, it was incredible.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_03: And I donated 50% to different organizations to help um orphanages and things like that, so that way there's less homeless on the streets and also less kids that don't have families.
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_03: And I would say it was a successful purge night.
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_01: Solid.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_01: It's fantastic.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_01: I I would just like to make a note that so when when these things come up and you have a person with that good heart where they want to become financially on their own, it's sad that we live in a situation where you gotta do any of that while simultaneously looking out for yourself.
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_01: You know, it's just we're we're put into this really rough situation um where on purge night we're forced to decide between our own comfort and feeding those hungry, wide-eyed orphans.
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you know, what's stopping them from robbing a bank?
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, no, you no, that's what I would do.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, so I take back get band together with the orphans.
• 17:02
  SPEAKER_03: There we go.
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_03: And teach teach them to be pickpockets like Victorian London.
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_03: Basically, I'm just gonna become a gypsy and like uh like a yeah, basically like a bandit with a bunch of orphans.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_03: I don't think that's necessarily the Robin Hood way.
• 17:18
  SPEAKER_03: I think I'm really strangling.
• 17:20
  SPEAKER_01: All right, kids.
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm gonna teach you something real right now.
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_01: Whatever your little arms can carry is yours.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_01: Go, go, go.
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_01: Perfect.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_01: Purge helps those who help themselves.
• 17:31
  SPEAKER_01: Go.
• 17:34
  SPEAKER_03: Uh James, final thoughts how did Purge Night go?
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_03: Uh I'm using my purge night abilities to steal Luke's idea.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm gonna do exactly what he's doing because that sounds awesome.
• 17:46
  SPEAKER_01: All right, cool.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_01: Well then I'll say uh on my side, uh the three of us band together for purge night.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_04: We get a group of orphans, we teach them all the pickpocket, the rich.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_03: We just make millions.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_01: So it turns into um like you know how Halloween you go to the rich neighborhoods to get full bars.
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, we go to the rich neighborhoods to get full bank accounts.
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_03: There's these children just like, I need help, and then they clean them out.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that is bringing it all back, really.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_03: It will get them just very organized, they'll just be very organized orphans, and uh it'll work, I know.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_01: We're gonna be just we drive, they take on all the risk.
• 18:27
  SPEAKER_03: There's these are friendships that'll last for life.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_01: All right, so with that being said, it's time to move on to our second part of the podcast in which two mythical creatures or characters or sponsored I uh people will fight each other to death.
• 18:46
  SPEAKER_01: But before we do that, it's time for our fourth hit, and it's time for our fourth shot.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_01: Guys, what's this one too?
• 18:53
  SPEAKER_03: This one is to I I think I have one.
• 18:55
  SPEAKER_03: This one is to all those little orphans out there that could use a new skill, and and we can teach them.
• 19:04
  SPEAKER_03: www.we teachorch orphanspitpocket.com get on the headmaster's computer.
• 19:15
  SPEAKER_01: Uh cheers, guys.
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_04: Cheers.
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_04: Cheers.
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_03: Did you know?
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_03: We I don't think we've mentioned the matchup this whole time.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_03: I don't think we mentioned it earlier, which is which is crazy for us that we held on to it this long.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_01: We've changed a little bit.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_01: We've we've changed.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and I think we need to take a hard look at ourselves and our values here.
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_04: You you you've just become more patient.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, we're teaching patience.
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_01: So on this week, gotta be patient to pickpocket.
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_01: We have a fight between a Victorian mythological creature and Sherlock Holmes.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_03: And Bigfoot.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_01: So this week on High and Dry, bringing it to you like only we can, we have Sherlock Holmes going up against Bigfoot.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_01: The legendary wood ape sass.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_03: In Florida, he's known as the as the skunk ape.
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_03: So skunk ape, very interesting.
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_03: That's like his nickname over here.
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_03: Skunk ape, really.
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_03: It's because he's always got the best weed.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_03: And he he brings it around.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_03: It's that it's that viper.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_03: It's the viper stuff.
• 20:33
  SPEAKER_03: He's the one feeling it.
• 20:35
  SPEAKER_03: It's the skunk ape.
• 20:37
  SPEAKER_03: Skunky weed.
• 20:37
  SPEAKER_03: It's got a bad smell, but oh man, it gets you ripped.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_01: No, like in Florida, if you leave your shoes out a week before Christmas, Skunk Ape will leave something really dank in your shoes.
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_04: It's the skunk ape miracle.
• 20:53
  SPEAKER_04: Did you leave your cookies out?
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_01: There's just one bite out of them, and you see Bigfoot prints in the snow.
• 21:02
  SPEAKER_03: That's where the Bigfoot uh footprints come from.
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_03: The molds.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_03: You got all these parents out there making Bigfoot footprints to make their kids think that Sasquatch came by to drop weed in their shoes.
• 21:15
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, that's the world I want to live in.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, you see the Bigfoot tracks and like dad's all covered with mud hiding the big big footprints.
• 21:24
  SPEAKER_01: As the youngest one who hasn't learned manners yet is already lighting up a pipe.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_00: Oh shit.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_01: So what were we talking about?
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_01: Oh yeah.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_01: Sherlock Holmes versus Bigfoot.
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_01: So in high and dry, we have a patented method to determine which of these characters is going to come out on top.
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_01: We do this in three rounds.
• 21:44
  SPEAKER_01: The first round is these characters jump into a ring while Tyler Durden looks on.
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_01: Of course, um fucking Carl Urban is in the box and he's watching from beyond because he always has that spot in high and dry.
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we're in the banker's box with him.
• 21:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_01: Us and Carl Urban partying and watching Bigfoot and Sherlock Holmes fight.
• 22:03
  SPEAKER_01: Um that's good.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_01: That's just a good fight to watch.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's just a solid fight.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_03: Back in the 80s, it was cocaine parties, but it's generally the same, same idea.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_03: It's the same captain.
• 22:13
  SPEAKER_01: Um in second round, these characters.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_01: Characters receive a manila envelope tossed into their homes, um, in which they now understand that they are being contracted to kill the other one.
• 22:23
  SPEAKER_01: At that point, they have access to all their items and their stratagems, and they're gonna figure out how to kill this guy.
• 22:30
  SPEAKER_01: And then in round three is the same concept, except this time they get to bring a partner.
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_01: And that one I'm particularly excited for.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_01: Me too, of course.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_01: So let's get started.
• 22:41
  SPEAKER_01: Round one, ding ding.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_01: These two characters have just stepped into a ring, they're surrounded by a bunch of shirtless dudes who've, you know, according to Fight Club, have had it with their own patriarchy, and they're punching each other to death.
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_01: Guests first, who would win?
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_01: Bigfoot or Sherlock Holmes.
• 23:00
  SPEAKER_03: So don't get me wrong.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_03: I've thought about that.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_03: Sherlock Holmes is gonna put up somewhat of a fight.
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_03: He's small, but he is, he is smart.
• 23:11
  SPEAKER_03: But with that being said, Bigfoot at some point is gonna get a hold of him and rip him in half.
• 23:19
  SPEAKER_03: That's what'll happen.
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_03: No way he comes out on top at the end of his fight.
• 23:25
  SPEAKER_01: Well, that that that brings me to uh so in in the Robert Downey Jr.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_01: Sherlock, where all the for the first time ever, the character is this master martial artist because he's yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_03: Like he can fight, fight, yeah.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_01: Which is weird, and you like he sits there and he thinks out the fight seconds before it happens.
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_01: I what I envision happening is you so you so time slows down, and Robert Downey Jr.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_01: is like, I come in in the under left side, I hit him in the right, I do blah blah blah, and then it fast forwards, and this ape grabs him and rips him in half.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_04: That's basically kind of what I picture, I suppose.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_04: That is that's the vision.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_01: Or you have um Benedict Cumberboched or Cumberbun um just gets ripped in half.
• 24:10
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I mean, like, let's be honest, like it's gonna be like you're just he's gonna try to hit him hard, hard as shit, and then he's just gonna get ripped in half.
• 24:18
  SPEAKER_03: That's that's he's gonna hit he's gonna hit this thing like it was a person, but it's not a person, it's an ape, it's a giant ape.
• 24:27
  SPEAKER_01: So you have the Robert Downey Jr.
• 24:29
  SPEAKER_01: voice.
• 24:29
  SPEAKER_01: I strike him to the left temple and realize it's an ape.
• 24:32
  SPEAKER_04: And then I die.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_04: Maybe if I beg it for mercy.
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_01: So time slows.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_01: I get down onto my left knee and then my right, and then I clasp my hands together and pray to God.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_01: Um, so I think I'm ready to take round one to a vote.
• 24:50
  SPEAKER_04: I didn't even get to say anything.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_04: I mean, I mean, all right, so James, thoughts?
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_04: I think a wood ape is going to murder Sherlock Holmes incredibly quickly.
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_04: Well, now I think I'm ready to take this to a vote.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_03: Guess this first.
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_03: Um, where are you voting?
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_03: It was close for me, but uh, I'm going with it.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_03: James, where are you voting for?
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_03: I think because uh because Sasquatch is a gentle creature, I think that Sherlock's plea for humanity, like for for mercy, will touch Sasquatch, and then Robert Downey Jr.'s Sherlock Holmes, who's a real piece of shit, will then choke out Sasquatch from behind after he thinks they've made friends because Sasquatch is naive.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_01: He hides too much.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_01: So now so we have to keep in mind that as we go into this, all things are canon.
• 25:47
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and which which reminds me of a movie that none of our viewers have seen.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_01: So um, everything's canon.
• 25:54
  SPEAKER_01: So Strange Wilderness, you know, Sasquatch was kind of this, you know, creature.
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_01: He stumbles out of his cave and he goes, huh?
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_01: As a bunch of people are, you know, coming in on his cave.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_01: So that might work, but so my vote now um still goes to the wood ape.
• 26:13
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's fair.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_03: I wanted a dissenting opinion, is that Sherlock is a real conniving piece of shit, and that might work for him in this situation.
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_01: And and that is without question, yeah.
• 26:26
  SPEAKER_01: But if you throw a conniving piece of shit into a cage with a fucking hereto undiscovered ape.
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_03: Like, let's be honest, if like a gorilla could is like just 10 times stronger than a man, uh Sasquatch just has to be astronomically stronger than a man.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_03: It's just like it's like not even a question.
• 26:48
  SPEAKER_03: Well, well, I think you're at the mercy of the ape, and then if you manage to get an upper hand on the ape, congratulations, but you're at the mercy of the ape.
• 26:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, well, I think the only way to really figure this out, you know, empirically, is to take Robert Downey Jr.
• 27:02
  SPEAKER_01: and throw him in a cage with a silver bag, and then we'll and then we'll get an approximation.
• 27:07
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_01: So like, hey man, this is for science, all right?
• 27:11
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I'm on gin and these guys have been smoking fucking viper pitch.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_03: This is the best, this is the best possible outcome, I think.
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I think this is fine.
• 27:21
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I mean, like, look, man, what were you gonna do after Iron Man?
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_01: All right, fight A's.
• 27:25
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, fight it.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_01: Well, they do have the new Sherlock coming out.
• 27:28
  SPEAKER_01: Um, Sherlock, send us Primrose Gin.
• 27:31
  SPEAKER_01: Um round two.
• 27:33
  SPEAKER_01: Moving into round two, we now have these two creatures have received a manila envelope.
• 27:39
  SPEAKER_03: The Sasquatch gets it under his male rock.
• 27:46
  SPEAKER_01: Kill the mailman.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_01: Well, he just sees the picture of Robert Downey Jr.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_01: and he's like, I must kill.
• 27:55
  SPEAKER_03: Must kill.
• 27:56
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we're gonna assume Sasquatch at least has instinctual hatred for um Robert Downey Jr.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_03: is Sherlock Holmes.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, yes, we've instilled that within him using Primrose Gin.
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_03: Listen, no one's ever found me, but it's not like I don't have internet and watch all the movies downloaded from Pirate Bay.
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_01: I am so pissed about Sherlock 2.
• 28:18
  unknown: All right.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_01: Round two, these characters now have access to their repertoire.
• 28:24
  SPEAKER_01: So Sherlock in his flat um is now aware that the equivalent of a forest silverback ape is beelining towards his flat to kill him.
• 28:37
  SPEAKER_03: So so I actually I don't think that's the ground that this would take place on.
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_03: I think it would take place and because Sasquatch is a North American animal, it would take place in North America.
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_03: But Sherlock Holmes has also traveled to do his his detective work.
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_03: So I think he would end up traveling to a small town in North America, and it would be somewhere between a British village and a a forested area.
• 29:00
  SPEAKER_01: Well, we're so in that case, we're looking at a Sasquatch circa because well, so Sherlock has gone against the Ripper, so you're looking at circa 1888, um, some North American village, so it's you know that 19th century Americana town.
• 29:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 29:17
  SPEAKER_01: You know, so Tom Hu and Tom and Hook are fucking painting a fence.
• 29:21
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, somewhere.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_01: And a wood ape ripped them in half.
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_03: And Sherlock has kind of like centered centered them down to this town.
• 29:28
  SPEAKER_03: He's like, okay, center around this town.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_03: I I like to think of this like like I like to think Sherlock Holmes would approach this like Hound of the Baskervilles, where he had to go out to that small town and he had to then go look in the moors and figure this out.
• 29:42
  SPEAKER_03: It's like he's dr he's going into nature, and and it's something he was very uncomfortable with.
• 29:48
  SPEAKER_01: So Disney, because now you own 20th Century Fox and Warner Brothers and all that.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_01: If you start getting any funny ideas about this fucking podcast, um you know, Sherlock versus Bigfoot, um, Austin Powers versus Pennywise the clown.
• 30:03
  SPEAKER_01: Um, we want in on that action.
• 30:06
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
• 30:06
  SPEAKER_02: Don't steal our ideas.
• 30:08
  SPEAKER_02: We have proof.
• 30:09
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, we got proof.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_01: It's recorded.
• 30:11
  SPEAKER_01: So, guests first, round two.
• 30:15
  SPEAKER_01: Um, Luke, who do you think is gonna take this one?
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_03: The way that it's gonna play out is so Sherlock centralized him.
• 30:23
  SPEAKER_03: He's they're like, okay, he's in this town.
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_03: I don't think Bigfoot can hunt Sherlock Holmes down.
• 30:30
  SPEAKER_03: He doesn't have the the intelligence for it.
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_03: So I think Bigfoot gets the picture, he knows he wants to kill him, he he's just walking around aimlessly trying to kill him.
• 30:39
  SPEAKER_03: So, but Sherlock is hunting him down.
• 30:42
  SPEAKER_03: So then what it comes down to is can Sherlock create a a trap elaborate enough, I think, to kill Bigfoot, basically.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_03: I think that's the only the only outcome where Sherlock wins.
• 30:56
  SPEAKER_03: Because if as soon as Bigfoot sees Sherlock Holmes, I think that's when Sherlock Holmes dies, because he'll just be like you said, beeline towards him, and now it's now it's now it's ape versus Sherlock Holmes again.
• 31:08
  SPEAKER_01: Well, if you don't mind, I'd like to offer a dissenting point.
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_01: Um so we're talking about a wood ape here who has managed to elude the Discovery Channel, TLC, um, you know, fucking the history channel.
• 31:26
  SPEAKER_01: Hide and seek world champion.
• 31:27
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, without a doubt.
• 31:28
  SPEAKER_01: Um so we're we're talking about an ape here who I well he could at least outthink the people that the Discovery Channel pays to find him.
• 31:38
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, people that get paid millions of dollars in Italy's budget to hunt him down.
• 31:44
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and so I'm not saying that he has like an invisibility cloak.
• 31:49
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just saying what we have here is an ape who can recognize paid people coming in on his territory, and he's like, I don't need to be on TV right now.
• 32:00
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just not ready.
• 32:02
  SPEAKER_03: You know, that could be all instinctual.
• 32:05
  SPEAKER_03: So that could just be like, I cannot be seen.
• 32:07
  SPEAKER_03: That's like the that this is the way.
• 32:10
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, you know, it could be instinctual.
• 32:13
  SPEAKER_03: That's true.
• 32:13
  SPEAKER_03: Do we think the wood ape has some sort of camouflage ability?
• 32:16
  SPEAKER_03: I think I think the wood ape has some either some sort of camouflage ability or he is super intelligent.
• 32:23
  SPEAKER_03: It's either one of those two things.
• 32:25
  SPEAKER_03: If we give him the super intelligent, it's gotta be one or the other, I suppose.
• 32:29
  SPEAKER_01: Well, if the history channel is to be believed, he may have some sort of Harry Potter cloak, which allows him to banish.
• 32:38
  SPEAKER_04: The history channel, the place for facts.
• 32:42
  SPEAKER_03: Um, in all honesty, I trust the history channel with my life.
• 32:46
  SPEAKER_03: So uh we're gonna I'm still waiting for the history channel to get banned from Twitter.
• 32:51
  SPEAKER_01: Um well uh James, thoughts?
• 32:56
  SPEAKER_03: Uh my thoughts are that Bigfoot, because he is hide-and-seek world champion, I think that he could even evade Sherlock Holmes up to a point.
• 33:07
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I think that that's Bigfoot's first goal is evasion.
• 33:12
  SPEAKER_03: It's not to go at him directly, it's that, you know, he people have tried to find Bigfoot a million times.
• 33:17
  SPEAKER_03: He's like he's kind of like the Trojans in the Trojan War, like, my walls will stand forever.
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_03: No one has ever breached our walls.
• 33:24
  SPEAKER_03: And that's kind of how he's gonna act with his camouflage.
• 33:27
  SPEAKER_03: And uh there may be an argument there that Sherlock Holmes breaks that for the first time, but uh, I think as Sherlock Holmes just figures out how Bigfoot camouflages himself, then Bigfoot fucking rips into pieces just like in round one.
• 33:43
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_01: Well that's well, I mean, if anyone could.
• 33:47
  SPEAKER_01: I I think that's the I mean because oftentimes we deal with the theme of a character, you know, John McClane, all of Harry Potter won just because he's supposed to.
• 33:57
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, because he's Harry Potter, yeah.
• 33:59
  SPEAKER_01: So that brings in Sherlock Holmes.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_01: Sherlock Holmes is supposed to find him.
• 34:04
  SPEAKER_03: He is supposed to find him.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_03: Um damn, you're right.
• 34:08
  SPEAKER_03: He also has guns.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_03: He also he also knows.
• 34:11
  SPEAKER_03: That's a huge thing.
• 34:12
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's a weapon.
• 34:14
  SPEAKER_01: He can shoot a gun.
• 34:15
  SPEAKER_01: No, so what what so for my my thoughts on it, what I envisioning happening is uh Sherlock using his you know deduction and elementary and what have you.
• 34:30
  SPEAKER_01: Um he finds Bigfoot and Bigfoot goes, huh?
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_01: And then Sherlock unloads.
• 34:40
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, so this is 1888.
• 34:42
  SPEAKER_01: So I mean, he unloads with automatic weaponry and um just sends this wood ape straight to hell.
• 34:49
  unknown: Yeah.
• 34:51
  unknown: Yeah.
• 34:52
  SPEAKER_03: You take 20 bullets, I don't care if you're a wood ape or not, you're going to hell.
• 34:57
  SPEAKER_01: That's it.
• 34:58
  SPEAKER_01: That's it.
• 34:58
  SPEAKER_01: Um, so I uh um I mean if he was a skunk ape, he'd be high on meth.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_01: And uh, you know, he'd have a few seconds to get close to him.
• 35:06
  SPEAKER_03: But uh both are going down, I feel like.
• 35:10
  SPEAKER_03: We're both going down.
• 35:12
  SPEAKER_03: We got a wood ape on bass sauce.
• 35:15
  SPEAKER_03: Uh yeah, Sherlock killed it, but he killed Sherlock at the same time.
• 35:19
  SPEAKER_03: It's not a good time.
• 35:20
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I'm ready to bring this to a vote.
• 35:22
  SPEAKER_03: Guests first.
• 35:23
  SPEAKER_03: Um, Luke, what do you think?
• 35:25
  SPEAKER_03: I think Sherlock has a gun on him and he he's gonna win this fight.
• 35:28
  SPEAKER_03: I think he just saws him down.
• 35:30
  SPEAKER_01: There's one for Sherlock.
• 35:31
  SPEAKER_01: Uh James, what do you think?
• 35:37
  SPEAKER_03: I think that uh I think that Sherlock is supposed to be is supposed to find him, but also Sherlock is he is at times meant to be relatable.
• 35:47
  SPEAKER_03: He is like confounded by things.
• 35:49
  SPEAKER_03: I wonder how long Bigfoot could confound him.
• 35:52
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, I kind of wonder if Bigfoot isn't meant to be found also in canon.
• 35:57
  SPEAKER_03: I wonder if he's also not meant to be found.
• 35:59
  SPEAKER_03: Well, but he does get found frequently in canon.
• 36:02
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, in canon he gets found all the fucking time.
• 36:05
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, never mind.
• 36:06
  SPEAKER_01: Sherlock.
• 36:08
  SPEAKER_01: You convinced me.
• 36:09
  SPEAKER_01: All right, there you go.
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_01: Cool.
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 36:11
  SPEAKER_01: My opinion is unshakeable.
• 36:16
  SPEAKER_03: And it's sad.
• 36:17
  SPEAKER_03: I have I have a love for love for Bigfoot.
• 36:20
  SPEAKER_03: I grew up watching shows, shows about Bigfoot with my dad.
• 36:23
  SPEAKER_03: So like I don't I want him to win, but I think he's just not smart enough to handle it.
• 36:28
  SPEAKER_01: We encounter that so much.
• 36:31
  SPEAKER_01: In in a previous episode, Austin Powers was kicked to death by Jared from Subway.
• 36:38
  SPEAKER_01: Um it broke my heart.
• 36:44
  SPEAKER_04: But but let's not let's not let's not talk too much about our previous episodes.
• 36:48
  SPEAKER_02: Let's focus on this one.
• 36:50
  SPEAKER_01: So um I it well, irrelevant um because so for our guests and for those of our first-time listeners, at any point where two of the high and dry crew decide that it's going one way, the third person's opinion magically changes, as it will be for all of you on Facebook and YouTube and Instagram.
• 37:10
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, if you if you had disagreed at some point, you do not anymore.
• 37:14
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so I don't want to hear it.
• 37:15
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah, I'm gonna say Bigfoot.
• 37:17
  SPEAKER_01: Wait, what?
• 37:18
  SPEAKER_01: No, Sherlock.
• 37:19
  SPEAKER_01: That's right, you're damn right in Sherlock.
• 37:21
  SPEAKER_01: What happened?
• 37:22
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my god.
• 37:24
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna say Sherlock without a doubt.
• 37:28
  SPEAKER_01: Hands down.
• 37:29
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and it it's going that way again, where it's like somebody takes the first round, somebody takes the second round.
• 37:35
  SPEAKER_03: It it happens, it just happens sometimes.
• 37:37
  SPEAKER_03: We've had blowouts, but this one is not a blowout.
• 37:40
  SPEAKER_01: No, no.
• 37:41
  SPEAKER_01: Um, Sherlock's gonna take it.
• 37:43
  SPEAKER_01: He pays Bigfoot back for getting fucking ripped apart in round one, which brings us to round three.
• 37:51
  SPEAKER_01: And before we get into round three, Luke, I just want to say it's great getting to talk with you again.
• 37:58
  SPEAKER_01: Um, for our listeners here, Luke and myself, we went to Air Force Basic training together.
• 38:04
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and I've missed you to death, man.
• 38:06
  SPEAKER_01: It's good getting to talk with you a little bit about something.
• 38:10
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, getting to just bullshit and laugh and just like we somehow found time to do at you know three in the morning while we were on EC duty.
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but so me and Luke, we at one point we had fake training weapons in our hands and we're guarding a door, and uh we found a way to have the greatest time on fucking earth.
• 38:36
  SPEAKER_03: Oh I mean, I honestly say that's one of the hardest times I've laughed ever.
• 38:42
  SPEAKER_01: Without a doubt, as 29 other basic training recruits are snoring and farting, me and this asshole at three in the morning, keeping it real.
• 38:52
  SPEAKER_03: That is that is the feeling that this show tries to emulate, and I'm glad you were able to recapture it.
• 38:57
  SPEAKER_01: I really am cheers, cheers, cheers to the good times, to the good times and never letting them go.
• 39:05
  unknown: Woo!
• 39:09
  SPEAKER_01: Ah, and to being able to take down your fourth shot of Primrose Gin without ever having a chaser.
• 39:15
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, fifth, fifth.
• 39:17
  SPEAKER_01: My partner is reminding me.
• 39:20
  SPEAKER_03: Your partner's like, what are you talking about?
• 39:22
  SPEAKER_03: That's there's a lot of that.
• 39:25
  SPEAKER_03: You've only taken four, you need to catch up.
• 39:27
  SPEAKER_01: Primrose gin.
• 39:28
  SPEAKER_01: Forget what shot you're on.
• 39:33
  SPEAKER_01: But anyway, Luke, it's great to talk to you again.
• 39:36
  SPEAKER_01: Round three.
• 39:37
  SPEAKER_01: This is the big one and the one I'm most excited for, where shit's gonna even itself out again.
• 39:43
  SPEAKER_01: Now, so in round three of high and dry fights, our characters get to bring a friend.
• 39:48
  SPEAKER_01: Because, you know, what's life without friendship?
• 39:51
  SPEAKER_01: So Bigfoot's gonna come up with a friend, and I'm excited for that one.
• 39:54
  SPEAKER_01: And Sherlock's gonna come going to come up with a friend.
• 39:57
  SPEAKER_01: I'm excited for that one.
• 39:59
  SPEAKER_01: Let's talk business.
• 40:01
  SPEAKER_01: Before we um get to our first thoughts on the matter, guys, who do we think Sherlock is gonna bring to the table?
• 40:09
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, there's obviously the obvious answer.
• 40:12
  SPEAKER_03: Who we got our partner and crying Watson.
• 40:15
  SPEAKER_03: You know, that's kind of do you have any unique offerings or would you defer to Watson?
• 40:23
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, no, no, no.
• 40:24
  SPEAKER_03: I think I think I think Sherlock needs uh a better partner than that.
• 40:29
  SPEAKER_03: I think he needs some brute force um going on on his side.
• 40:32
  SPEAKER_03: So I think he's gonna recruit Dwayne the Rock Johnson um to the fight to be able to um actor?
• 40:42
  SPEAKER_03: No, the wrestler.
• 40:43
  SPEAKER_03: It's this is wrestler Dwayne the Rock Johnson.
• 40:45
  SPEAKER_03: Can you smell what the rock is cooking?
• 40:48
  SPEAKER_03: Fucking everything.
• 40:49
  SPEAKER_03: How do they exist in the same world?
• 40:51
  SPEAKER_03: Well, look, look, look, you're talking about yeah, I think so.
• 40:53
  SPEAKER_01: You're talking about a wrestler who's taking off Shawn Michaels, Mankind.
• 40:57
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know if a wood ape could stand up to that.
• 41:00
  SPEAKER_01: Triple A.
• 41:02
  SPEAKER_03: But the thing is, is right now Sherlock just has such a disadvantage with brute force.
• 41:06
  SPEAKER_03: So I think that that's what he needs.
• 41:08
  SPEAKER_03: He needs someone who's there for him to be like, you know, Bigfoot's gonna be like, what's up?
• 41:14
  SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna just beat both y'all, and then freaking it's the rock pops out, Bigfoot starts trembling.
• 41:22
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, can't Bigfoot smell what The Rock is cooking?
• 41:25
  SPEAKER_03: And uh so aside from that being a hilarious combination, I uh I don't know how Sherlock would recruit The Rock in 1888.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_01: Well, but don't you know that Dwayne is obviously an immortal.
• 41:39
  SPEAKER_04: I don't I don't think I don't think that he would have access to he's been wrestling since before the before America.
• 41:48
  SPEAKER_01: When Dwayne signed on with the WWF, well the WF at that point, um, he had a portrait that aged for him.
• 41:57
  SPEAKER_01: And so Dorian Dwayne.
• 42:01
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, he's easy as Dorian Gray.
• 42:04
  SPEAKER_01: The rock, they're always gray.
• 42:06
  SPEAKER_01: Rocks are they're not always gray, but they are typically gray.
• 42:10
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and well, he wasn't thinking like that, all right?
• 42:13
  SPEAKER_01: Dorian Gray is laying pipe, all right?
• 42:15
  SPEAKER_01: He doesn't have time to think about your semantics.
• 42:17
  SPEAKER_01: So are we actually going to allow assuming that Dwayne is Dorian Gray?
• 42:23
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, but what did you have in mind?
• 42:25
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we we need some more offerings on the table.
• 42:27
  SPEAKER_03: So Dorian Gray's on the table.
• 42:31
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my god.
• 42:33
  SPEAKER_03: So uh I was thinking Irene Adler, who is Sherlock Holmes' love interest and one of the only people to ever outsmart him.
• 42:43
  SPEAKER_03: And also an sometimes ally, who we who we can we we've said in other episodes that you can bring sometimes allies in.
• 42:52
  SPEAKER_03: And that's who Irene Adler is.
• 42:55
  SPEAKER_03: She's outsmarted him, she's provided a different way of thinking that he hadn't had hadn't thought of.
• 43:00
  SPEAKER_03: Um, she sometimes thinks circles around him, and she's deadly.
• 43:05
  SPEAKER_01: And she's played by uh Rachel McAdams.
• 43:08
  SPEAKER_03: She is played by Rachel Rachel McAdams in the in the Robert Downey Jr Jr.
• 43:13
  SPEAKER_03: ones.
• 43:13
  SPEAKER_03: God, I'm so fucking high.
• 43:15
  SPEAKER_03: I know.
• 43:15
  SPEAKER_03: So then in that.
• 43:18
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I mean, no, that that's that's a solid option.
• 43:21
  SPEAKER_03: And honestly, with the with the the second kind of line of thought, it gives a whole new dynamic to their like, you know, their plan at that point.
• 43:29
  SPEAKER_03: It could be it could be uh so elaborate that no matter who who Bigfoot brings, they can't won't be able to keep up.
• 43:37
  SPEAKER_01: They are both geniuses.
• 43:39
  SPEAKER_01: Well then then I would like to offer one more option between Dwayne the Rock Johnson, Johnson, slash Dorian Gray.
• 43:49
  SPEAKER_01: Um which does say a lot about Dwayne.
• 43:53
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, if you read Oscar Wilde, the next person I would like to propose to the gentleman of this fight is Professor James Moriarty.
• 44:04
  SPEAKER_01: Was he ever sometimes ally?
• 44:06
  SPEAKER_01: In the Benedict Cumberbacht version, it's his brother.
• 44:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, but that's not Moriarty.
• 44:13
  SPEAKER_03: Wait, no, no, no, Moriarty's not his brother.
• 44:15
  SPEAKER_03: Brother.
• 44:15
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 44:15
  SPEAKER_03: No.
• 44:16
  SPEAKER_03: And he's only looking out for him.
• 44:18
  SPEAKER_03: No.
• 44:19
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 44:20
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
• 44:20
  SPEAKER_03: I don't think so.
• 44:21
  SPEAKER_03: His brother's Mycroft.
• 44:23
  SPEAKER_03: I don't think, I don't think Moriarty is his brother.
• 44:26
  SPEAKER_03: Oh fuck.
• 44:27
  SPEAKER_01: Am I just too drunk?
• 44:28
  SPEAKER_01: I think you might be too drunk.
• 44:29
  SPEAKER_01: Alright, well then I'm saying Dorian Gray.
• 44:31
  unknown: Damn it.
• 44:33
  SPEAKER_03: Dorian Gray shall fight this fight today.
• 44:37
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I like it.
• 44:37
  SPEAKER_01: I like it.
• 44:38
  SPEAKER_01: It's a Sherlock Holmes.
• 44:39
  SPEAKER_01: They do not exist in the same universe.
• 44:42
  SPEAKER_01: Well, according to every fucking Penny Dreadful ever, they do.
• 44:46
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 44:48
  SPEAKER_01: So according to fucking um what what the hell is the writer of Dorian Gray?
• 44:54
  SPEAKER_01: I just said it.
• 44:55
  SPEAKER_01: Oscar Wilde.
• 44:56
  SPEAKER_01: God damn.
• 44:57
  SPEAKER_01: According to Oscar Wilde, anything is possible.
• 45:00
  SPEAKER_01: Sure.
• 45:02
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know if he said that or if that was like Chuck E.
• 45:04
  SPEAKER_01: Cheese or some shit.
• 45:05
  SPEAKER_01: It fits.
• 45:07
  SPEAKER_01: I'm willing to do it just because I think Bigfoot is going to bring in the Jersey Devil.
• 45:13
  SPEAKER_01: Interesting.
• 45:14
  SPEAKER_01: Jersey Devil.
• 45:15
  SPEAKER_01: Who's Breg?
• 45:17
  SPEAKER_01: Who is Bigfoot going to bring in?
• 45:19
  SPEAKER_01: Guests first.
• 45:21
  SPEAKER_01: Guests?
• 45:21
  SPEAKER_01: Who do you think Bigfoot is going to bring?
• 45:23
  SPEAKER_03: I would think the Wendigo would be a solid option to fight alongside.
• 45:28
  SPEAKER_03: So it's a wit mythical creature.
• 45:30
  SPEAKER_03: It's kind of like deer antlers, kind of like almost like a deer monster with long arms stands on its hind legs, though.
• 45:39
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I I would honestly would go right away with you on Wendigo.
• 45:44
  SPEAKER_01: So the brother of Sasquatch is Yeti in that frozen tundra.
• 45:50
  SPEAKER_01: And so what a Wendigo is, is the creature.
• 45:54
  SPEAKER_01: So Wendigos are created when people who are estranged from society, whether they're exploring or what have you, are forced into cannibalism.
• 46:04
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 46:04
  SPEAKER_01: In those tundras.
• 46:06
  SPEAKER_01: And so I I think it would be totally possible that our fucking Sasquatched Yeti ass motherfucker is like, hey, I'm fighting fighting Dwayne the Rock Johnson here.
• 46:21
  SPEAKER_01: I need your cannibal ass to help me.
• 46:25
  SPEAKER_03: And then the Wendigo would totally go for it because it eats people to steal their power.
• 46:30
  SPEAKER_03: And he would want to steal Dwayne the Rock Johnson's power.
• 46:33
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 46:34
  SPEAKER_03: He would be like, Did you say Dwayne the Rock Johnson?
• 46:38
  SPEAKER_03: I've been searching for power for centuries.
• 46:43
  SPEAKER_01: So the Wendigo's like, fuck yeah, bro.
• 46:47
  SPEAKER_01: I'm in.
• 46:47
  SPEAKER_03: I was honestly, I was gonna say Mothman, but I think that I think that I like Wendigo better.
• 46:54
  SPEAKER_03: And you know, I was also thinking Loch Ness Monster, but that was like you'd have to get him near water.
• 46:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 46:59
  SPEAKER_01: So at that point it'd be it'd be on the Yeti's turf to get Sherlock to the water.
• 47:03
  SPEAKER_01: And Sherlock's like, I estimate that he's bringing me to the water to fight the Loch Ness Monster.
• 47:11
  SPEAKER_03: I shall not get it, yeah.
• 47:12
  SPEAKER_03: And then it'll just avoid the water, let's be honest.
• 47:15
  SPEAKER_03: I will avoid the water.
• 47:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, Mothman would be a good aerial force, but I think the Wendigo, because it is like unkillable, like Well, the the the only reason why I would say the Wendigo.
• 47:28
  SPEAKER_01: So so if you if your side has an air force and the other side doesn't, historically, that means you win.
• 47:34
  SPEAKER_01: So I I feel that the Yeti would seek out Mothman, but Mothman is closer to the night, he's 1960s, Point Pleasant, West Virginia.
• 47:45
  SPEAKER_01: He's not accessible.
• 47:47
  SPEAKER_01: What is accessible as far as like the terror, the the HMS terror is concerned?
• 47:52
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, um, you know, Dan Simmons novel, um, you'll definitely he'll be able to reach a wendigo.
• 47:57
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm definitely saying the when to go.
• 47:59
  SPEAKER_01: I'm down for it.
• 48:00
  SPEAKER_01: Alright, cool.
• 48:01
  SPEAKER_01: That's all I needed to hear.
• 48:02
  SPEAKER_01: Uh uh, Luke, you could you down for it?
• 48:04
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, wendigo's for sure, for sure the option for me.
• 48:07
  SPEAKER_01: Bigfoot and the wendigo going up against Sherlock Holmes and Dwayne the Rock Johnson.
• 48:16
  SPEAKER_01: Dorian Gray.
• 48:17
  SPEAKER_01: Who's gonna take it?
• 48:18
  SPEAKER_01: Guest first thoughts.
• 48:20
  SPEAKER_03: I have to say, you know, I think with the Wendigo on his side, being and like and like James said, he's like kind of like just a mortal, it's gonna be pretty difficult for um Dwayne the Rock Johnson to stand up.
• 48:34
  SPEAKER_03: It brute strength aside, I I don't know if he'll he'll be able to match up to it.
• 48:39
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and with that being said, we already we already know a Sasquatch for Sherlock fight.
• 48:45
  SPEAKER_03: So, I mean, unless Sherlock and Dwayne come up with an elaborate scheme to be able to to kind of trap these two mythical beasts, I think it it's gonna be a s an absolute slaughter, Wendigo and Bigfoot winning.
• 49:01
  SPEAKER_03: I you know, and and I I think that unkillable about the Wendigo is is a is a really good point.
• 49:07
  SPEAKER_03: But in League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, uh Dorian Gray was unkillable.
• 49:13
  SPEAKER_03: All the damage he took, if he got stabbed or shot or whatever, it happened to the painting instead of him.
• 49:19
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 49:19
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I'm I'm willing to side with that.
• 49:22
  SPEAKER_01: Where I would defer.
• 49:25
  SPEAKER_01: Um, so we know that as these these characters meet in open combat, you know, in this North American 19th century town, um, is Bigfoot will rip Sherlock apart.
• 49:40
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 49:41
  SPEAKER_01: Um so then it comes down to Dorian Gray and the Wendigo.
• 49:45
  SPEAKER_03: Well, well, Sherlock gets to use his intelligence along with Dorian.
• 49:50
  SPEAKER_01: He can use Dorian Gray as a well, well, so as far as Darren Dorian Gray is concerned.
• 49:56
  SPEAKER_01: So first, Dorian Gray, anything that the Wendigo manages to do to him.
• 50:02
  SPEAKER_01: Now, granted, Oscar Wilde did not anticipate a mythical cannibal monster and a wood ape ripping him apart.
• 50:11
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know if that would show in the painting.
• 50:14
  SPEAKER_01: Um canon.
• 50:16
  SPEAKER_01: But so as far as League of Australian Gentlemen, yes.
• 50:19
  SPEAKER_01: The thing I would then state that might work against Dorian Gray, his entire theme, which is very important when it comes to John McClain, Austin Powers, everything is Dorian Gray's theme is guilt and resentment.
• 50:35
  SPEAKER_01: Um Dorian Gray eventually stabs his own painting to end his guilt.
• 50:41
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 50:41
  SPEAKER_01: Um, which Dwayne The Rock Johnson, waiting on you, buddy.
• 50:45
  SPEAKER_01: Meanwhile, the Wendigo has no guilt.
• 50:50
  SPEAKER_01: He's like, I ate people and now I eat people.
• 50:53
  SPEAKER_01: And Dorian Gray looks like people.
• 50:56
  SPEAKER_03: Well, this might just be another thing for Dorian Gray to be regretful about later.
• 51:00
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
• 51:01
  SPEAKER_03: Which he destroys it.
• 51:03
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, I have to say, I mean, if if any listeners haven't haven't seen what um the Wendigo looks like, look it up.
• 51:10
  SPEAKER_03: I'm pretty sure the Dwayne the Rockman, Dorian Gray, is gonna just tremble in fear when he sees this thing.
• 51:18
  SPEAKER_03: Like he's gonna be like, Can you smell rock?
• 51:23
  SPEAKER_01: See, so so here's the one thing I have against that is that the Wendigo, he's eaten people, he's survived harsh experiences, but he has has he survived an experience as harsh as the people's elbow?
• 51:38
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 51:41
  SPEAKER_03: Wendigos are also famously very good hiders.
• 51:45
  SPEAKER_01: But but if Dwayne Johnson manages to get the Wendigo down about middle of the ring and he can pull off the people's elbow, I think it's over.
• 51:54
  SPEAKER_01: It's yeah, that's that's a word.
• 51:57
  SPEAKER_03: But don't forget, this is we're just worried about the wendigo.
• 52:01
  SPEAKER_03: Like, what if what if Bigfoot manages to kill Sherlock and joins in on the fight?
• 52:06
  SPEAKER_03: A 2v1 Wendigo Bigfoot versus the Rock.
• 52:09
  SPEAKER_03: That's just uh that's also a that's a L.
• 52:12
  SPEAKER_03: And if Sherlock is being smart, he's sending uh he's sending Dorian Gray out there, you know, to deal with the scary shit.
• 52:20
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and that probably leaves uh Dorian Gray susceptible for a two-on-one.
• 52:25
  SPEAKER_03: But with that being said, Sherlock, I would assume brings the gun, like we stated in.
• 52:31
  SPEAKER_01: As far as canon goes, I'm gonna stop you both.
• 52:34
  SPEAKER_01: You're both wrong, all right?
• 52:35
  SPEAKER_01: Because the rock has defeated John Cena, he who cannot be seen.
• 52:41
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, that is very true.
• 52:44
  SPEAKER_03: So that does that defeat both of ours.
• 52:48
  SPEAKER_03: Our arguments.
• 52:49
  SPEAKER_03: Somehow, Sherlock transported the World Wrestling Federation back in time to 1888, and I guess that there's literally no way to defeat him.
• 53:03
  SPEAKER_01: Well, well, then see, in my opinion, this is why The Rock was able to defeat John Cena, was because he's like, wait a minute.
• 53:10
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, training against the Windigo.
• 53:12
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, back in 18, back in the 19th century, I didn't wake up.
• 53:17
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, back when I still went by Dorian, right?
• 53:20
  SPEAKER_03: Like we stated, the rock's been around for centuries.
• 53:23
  SPEAKER_03: So this is you know, he's he's a well these were the these were the proving grounds.
• 53:30
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 53:31
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I mean it depends on how much tilapia he's eating at the time.
• 53:36
  SPEAKER_02: All right, let's take a vote.
• 53:38
  SPEAKER_01: All right, it's time to bring it to a vote.
• 53:41
  SPEAKER_01: We have fucking how did this happen?
• 53:43
  SPEAKER_01: Sherlock Holmes and I I wasn't being stringent enough with you.
• 53:48
  SPEAKER_01: We have Sherlock Holmes and Dorian Gray, who's actually Dwayne the Rock Johnson, versus fucking Bigfoot and the Wendigo.
• 53:58
  SPEAKER_01: Who's gonna take it?
• 53:59
  SPEAKER_01: Guests first, what's your vote?
• 54:03
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 54:04
  SPEAKER_03: All all things aside, you know, Dorian Gray, as great as he is Dwayne The Rock Johnson, as great as he is, um, I have to say the Wendigo and Bigfoot are just gonna overpower them.
• 54:17
  SPEAKER_03: I don't think Sherlock will be enough of a help with his smarts unless he saws down um Bigfoot, which I think the Wendigo with his immortalness is just gonna take those bullets on.
• 54:28
  SPEAKER_03: They're gonna rip them apart, and it's a it's an L for Sherlock and Dwayne The Rock Johnson, sadly.
• 54:33
  SPEAKER_01: Well, interesting side.
• 54:34
  SPEAKER_01: James, James, what's your vote?
• 54:36
  SPEAKER_03: I think uh I think Sherlock Holmes is based a lot on improvisation, uh, and he's really good at improvisation.
• 54:43
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, but I don't know how he would improvise in the forest environment against an immortal cannibal deer monster and a camouflaging ape man, uh, even with uh someone as stellar cosmically powerful as Dwayne the Rock Johnson.
• 55:04
  SPEAKER_03: Uh I uh my purple Zelbow! I I think that they'd get out, he he'd send Dorian Gray out into the woods, Dorian Gray would never come back, and then Sherlock would go out of the woods, and Sherlock would never come back.
• 55:20
  SPEAKER_03: What about you?
• 55:21
  SPEAKER_03: What about you, Ryan?
• 55:23
  SPEAKER_01: Well, so I would say for the the so that that's two for Bigfoot.
• 55:27
  SPEAKER_01: Before my opinion changes, let me state my opinion.
• 55:32
  SPEAKER_01: So what I see happening, Sherlock will be so mesmerized by the people's elbow.
• 55:38
  SPEAKER_02: As that'll explode.
• 55:40
  SPEAKER_01: As he's taking as Dwayne the Rock Johnson is defeating the Wendigo.
• 55:47
  SPEAKER_01: He'll so he'll be like, holy shit, that's the people's elbow.
• 55:51
  SPEAKER_01: I I I this hasn't even been a thing yet, but I can smell what the rock is cooking.
• 55:56
  SPEAKER_01: And he'll be so distracted that he'll turn around at that point in like whatever you know tavern he's looking out into the streets at, and he'll see Bigfoot coming at him, and it'll be that slow down Robert Downey Jr.
• 56:12
  SPEAKER_01: time moment where he's like, I see Bigfoot breaking my legs, and then I see Bigfoot snapping my neck.
• 56:20
  SPEAKER_01: And we see that in slow motion, and then we see it play out super fast, and uh all of a sudden Dwayne the Rock Johnson takes a chair to the back.
• 56:32
  SPEAKER_01: His weakness is chairs, his weakness is chairs and Bigfoot is superds.
• 56:38
  SPEAKER_03: And ladders.
• 56:39
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, yeah, and without a doubt.
• 56:44
  SPEAKER_03: I I think it would be so it would be so funny just like seeing like a scene of Bigfoot running right at Robert Downey Jr.
• 56:51
  SPEAKER_03: Sherlock O'Shea.
• 56:53
  SPEAKER_03: Oh god, what is about that this is about to happen?
• 56:56
  SPEAKER_03: My legs will be broken in a matter of seconds.
• 56:58
  SPEAKER_03: Like just oh my god, oh my god, I'm seeing it.
• 57:01
  SPEAKER_01: It's pretty clear where this is headed right now.
• 57:04
  SPEAKER_01: So in slow motion, we witness dw no, first we witness fucking Robert Downey Jr., Iron Man getting ripped to death by Skunk Ape.
• 57:15
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 57:16
  SPEAKER_01: And then Dwayne the Rock Johnson, aka Dorian Gray getting hit with a chair or a ladder with a chair or a ladder, or some kind of foreign object.
• 57:26
  SPEAKER_03: Foreign objects!
• 57:30
  SPEAKER_01: And he goes down, and there's nothing that Rampage or whatever other crazy movies he's been in can do to save him.
• 57:39
  SPEAKER_01: Nope.
• 57:41
  SPEAKER_01: Is now like going turnbuckle to turnbuckle, you know, cheering on his own victory.
• 57:47
  SPEAKER_01: And there you have it.
• 57:48
  SPEAKER_01: Three for three.
• 57:49
  SPEAKER_01: Round three goes to Bigfoot and his partner, the Wendigo, and they take it.
• 57:57
  SPEAKER_01: And they take it.
• 57:58
  SPEAKER_03: What a victory it was, let's be honest.
• 58:01
  SPEAKER_03: It was it was quite a victory.
• 58:03
  SPEAKER_03: Sherlock Holmes put up a good fight.
• 58:05
  SPEAKER_03: Way to go, Sherlock.
• 58:06
  SPEAKER_03: But sadly, uh you're in the Wendigo and Bigfoot's territory at this point.
• 58:12
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 58:19
  SPEAKER_03: You are but a man.
• 58:21
  SPEAKER_03: Intelligence, you can be as smart as you want, but uh it's Bigfoot and a Windigo.
• 58:28
  SPEAKER_03: It doesn't matter.
• 58:31
  SPEAKER_03: If Sherlock didn't have any like personality faults or like some fail, he he ends up failing along the way.
• 58:37
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, but Bigfoot it's just Bigfoot.
• 58:39
  SPEAKER_03: Bigfoot's just Bigfoot, and Windigos just are just fucking killing machines.
• 58:42
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, no, and I think it's just a great point that being human is a weakness on this show.
• 58:49
  SPEAKER_02: It sure is.
• 58:50
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and the meanwhile, Bigfoot's just like, I'm gonna rip your legs off.
• 58:55
  SPEAKER_01: I hope you understand.
• 58:58
  SPEAKER_03: Oh I love that.
• 59:01
  SPEAKER_03: That that's my favorite thought of it.
• 59:02
  SPEAKER_03: It's like and then just rip and like, oh, it's and that's so that concludes it.
• 59:10
  SPEAKER_01: Everybody, there's high and dry.
• 59:12
  SPEAKER_01: Bigfoot beats Sherlock Holmes two to one, two to one, and for that, I would like to say Luke, thank you for joining us, James.
• 59:22
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you as always.
• 59:23
  SPEAKER_01: And thank you.
• 59:24
  SPEAKER_01: And Luke, just because I haven't seen you, because I haven't seen you in so long, I miss you to death.
• 59:29
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna finish off, finally, put to death this bottle of primrose that is haunted high and dry for three episodes.
• 59:37
  SPEAKER_01: So cheers.
• 59:38
  SPEAKER_01: Cheers.
• 59:39
  SPEAKER_03: Six shot, maybe one shot too far.
• 59:41
  SPEAKER_03: But wait I've had fun being on the show, guys.
• 59:43
  SPEAKER_03: I I appreciate you guys inviting me on.
• 59:46
  SPEAKER_03: Um anytime you guys want me to come on and talk, talk, talk some shit.
• 59:51
  SPEAKER_03: I'm down.
• 59:52
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 59:53
  SPEAKER_01: That sounds good.
• 59:53
  SPEAKER_01: We can't wait to be on your show.
• 59:55
  SPEAKER_01: So cheers.
• 59:56
  SPEAKER_01: Here's to Luke, here's to Bigfoot, here's to Dorian Gray, aka Dwayne The Rock Johnson.
• 1:00:02
  SPEAKER_01: Cheers.
• 1:00:02
  SPEAKER_03: Cheers.
• 1:00:03
  SPEAKER_03: Cheers to those in that insane killing machine, Sherlock Holmes.
• 1:00:07
  SPEAKER_01: No, I mean the windigo.
• 1:00:09
  SPEAKER_01: I mean the windigo.
• 1:00:11
  SPEAKER_03: All right, so there you go, everybody.
• 1:00:13
  SPEAKER_03: Luke, where can we find you?
• 1:00:15
  SPEAKER_03: You guys can find me at talk far gaming on Facebook.
• 1:00:19
  SPEAKER_03: Um, we also have an Instagram.
• 1:00:20
  SPEAKER_03: It's same thing at talkfar gaming.
• 1:00:23
  SPEAKER_03: Um, check us out.
• 1:00:24
  SPEAKER_03: You know, we we'd love for you guys to stop by and see the page.
• 1:00:28
  SPEAKER_01: Definitely.
• 1:00:29
  SPEAKER_01: Check him out, people.
• 1:00:30
  SPEAKER_01: He's got good content.
• 1:00:32
  SPEAKER_01: James, I'm half a bottle of primrose in.
• 1:00:34
  SPEAKER_01: Where can you find us?
• 1:00:35
  SPEAKER_03: You can find us at high and dry pod on Twitter.
• 1:00:39
  SPEAKER_03: You can catch us at high and dry podcast on Instagram.
• 1:00:43
  SPEAKER_03: I'm at the Diabolical on Twitter.
• 1:00:45
  SPEAKER_03: Ryan's at Barron North.
• 1:00:47
  SPEAKER_03: You can find us if you go to the High and Dry page.
• 1:00:49
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, anything else, Ryan?
• 1:00:51
  SPEAKER_01: Well, you could also just find me at RyanBarronNorth.com.
• 1:00:54
  SPEAKER_01: Luke, thanks for being on.
• 1:00:55
  SPEAKER_01: We love having you on.
• 1:00:56
  SPEAKER_01: You were a great guest.
• 1:00:57
  SPEAKER_01: James, thanks as always.
• 1:00:59
  SPEAKER_01: This has been High and Dry Podcast.
• 1:01:01
  SPEAKER_01: Catch you guys later.