Latest / Family Tree Food Stories / Why We Put Candles on a Birthday Cake? The Weird True History Behind Your Cake and Song

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Why We Put Candles on a Birthday Cake? The Weird True History Behind Your Cake and Song · Family Tree Food Stories

0:05
Nancy May: Hey everybody, I'm Nancy May and this is Family Food Stories
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where every dish has a little bit of history and every kitchen, yes, has a
0:12
secret, and we know you've got one too
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Sylvia France: Oh, it's probably in the back of the refrigerator somewhere.
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Nancy May: Molding.
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Sylvia France: No, no, no, no, no.
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it's fermenting.
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It doesn't mold I'm Sylvia Franz, and this is episode 100
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Nancy May: 100.
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Can you believe it?
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But before we start, our 100th episode ask, would you go to
0:35
Podcast.FamilyTreeFoodStories and share this episode with
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somebody that you care about?
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Because it can be your gift to them, and it's our gift from us to you, too.
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I wanna open this show with a question that I've never even
0:49
thought about before, Sylvia
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Sylvia France: Oh, please ask it
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Nancy May: Why do we set kids' birthday desserts on fire?
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Sylvia France: Oh, when you put it that way, I can see
1:00
toddlers hovering over a flame
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Nancy May: Yeah, not good.
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I'm serious.
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We actually set a dessert on fire and then put a kid in front of it who's
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four years old with a birthday hat, sing Happy Birthday, help them blow out
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the candles, and hopefully you haven't had too many glasses of wine yourself
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Sylvia France: Oh, that's only when they're one or two.
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By four you c- you have to kind of like sober it up a bit but here's what got me.
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Not everybody does this.
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Whole world doesn't do cake at all
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Nancy May: Well, that doesn't sound like a birthday to me, but no cake?
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Sylvia France: Oh, just wait for it
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Nancy May: So I'm gonna guess it is Greek because everything we've ever said before
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somehow happened to start with the Greeks
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Sylvia France: It isn't Greek and it has nothing to do with the moon, but
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we do have a few Greek stories here
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Nancy May: then what is it?
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Sylvia France: It was actually a security system and that's
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all I'm telling right now
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Nancy May: A security system.
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I'm calling ADT just in case,
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Sylvia France: Well, ask me again a little later and I might tell you
1:59
Nancy May: Okay.
2:00
then take this one instead: There's only two birthday parties in the entire Bible.
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Did you know that?
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Sylvia France: Only two?
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Nancy May: Yep, only two It was Pharaoh's and Herod's, and one of them,
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the royal baker, is executed and the other, well, that's John the Baptist,
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and we know what happened there.
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Off with his head.
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Yuck
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Sylvia France: So both of the birthday parties in the Bible end in death.
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that explains a great deal about the next 1,500 years
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Nancy May: We know, pretty gruesome.
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But on that note, because we do have a tradition to uphold,
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glasses up to 100 episodes
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Sylvia France: we Are drinking Shirley Temples I understand
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Nancy May: Well, it's 10 in the morning, but I might look for
2:45
something a little extra later on.
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but there's a reason that we have Shirley Temples, and
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we'll get to that later, too.
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But here's to 100 episodes.
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Ching ching
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Sylvia France: So thank you for being here, and I'm so
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glad you're listening today
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Nancy May: And here's something you can use before we go anywhere else.
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At the next birthday party you go to, light one extra candle, one
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for each year, plus just one more
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and Stay with us and find out why it was once against the law to
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also sing Happy Birthday in a movie
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Sylvia France: Plus the one thing to say to somebody who hands you a cake
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that fell apart that's at the very end, and that's why we love this episode
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Nancy May: But let's start with your mom, because she baked you exactly
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one birthday cake her entire life
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Sylvia France: Thank goodness.
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Exactly one, and it was a total catastrophe.
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. The entire cake held up by a whole box of toothpicks stuck straight in
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Nancy May: Oh, I've seen those cakes before.
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Sylvia France: Oh, she told everyone how she stayed up all night on it
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and it was the first cake she ever made me, and thankfully the last
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Nancy May: So what happened every birthday thereafter?
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Sylvia France: Oh, she ordered from the Carvel ice cream parlor.
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It was a tradition, an ice cream cake every single year except that one
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Nancy May: Wow.
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I love Carvel ice cream cakes, but you were okay with that one?
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Sylvia France: Oh, of course.
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My birthday is the best day of the year except for Christmas and no added drama
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Nancy May: So here's what I wanna know though.
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Where did the carousel that you told me about come from on your cake?
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Sylvia France: It came off the Carvel cake from the year before.
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She saved it, and when she made The Disaster, she set
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that carousel right on top
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Nancy May: Year after year as a store topper
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Sylvia France: Yep, Because to her, the carousel was what made it a birthday,
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and of course she thought it was beautiful
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Nancy May: I'm sure it was.
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Sylvia France: Yes, and I never questioned it until this week
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Nancy May: Then you need to know where the carrot cake actually came from.
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Because like your mom's cake, it was kind of an accident
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Sylvia France: Oh, how?
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Nancy May: Well, if you're from the Northeast, you know the old
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commercials from Tom Carvel, and that's kind of what he sounded like.
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In 1934 Tom Carvel is driving an ice cream truck of frozen custard around
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Hartsdale, New York, and he gets a flat tire over a hot Memorial Day weekend
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Sylvia France: So let me guess.
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The custard is melting, so he pulls over and sells it soft right there to whoever
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walks past so he doesn't lose his profits
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Nancy May: Well, you know, you gotta love an entrepreneur, and
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that's pretty much what happens.
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So that is how the beginning of soft serve started.
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The whole category comes from a guy who couldn't fix a flat tire
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fast enough to get back on the road
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Sylvia France: So it makes sense that my childhood exists because
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of a roadside damage control
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Nancy May: I know, right?
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Sylvia France: But here's the part I keep coming back to.
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You said ice cream parlor?
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Was that a real place?
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Nancy May: It actually was.
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It was kind of a storefront, not really a parlor, but you walked in
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and somebody would write your name on a cake right in front of you
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Sylvia France: And now I notice what happened to my family.
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My mother probably drove to the parlor.
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I admit Years later, I drove to Dairy Queen
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Nancy May: So the errand survived in your house and well, I guess so did the cake
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Sylvia France: Yes, and The parlor is the part that mostly went away
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And here's what gets me is that I can make really great cakes.
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I've made them since I was 11 years old from scratch, but of course my
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kids like the ice cream cake better
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Nancy May: Dairy Queen year after year and you bought them deliberately
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just because they wanted them.
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I think that's pretty sweet
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Sylvia France: Well, we bought the biggest cake that we could buy
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Nancy May: The
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biggest?
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Sylvia France: the biggest on purpose
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Nancy May: So why was it so large,
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Sylvia France: Well, because we didn't want a birthday to last just one day.
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There was cake on Tuesday, there was cake on Thursday, the birthday that
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just keeps going on in the freezer.
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So what was really cool is my oldest, his birthday was in June, so we would
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buy a big one that would last till the - end of July, to my middle child,
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was born in September, and then we would have it until almost October 1st.
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So the whole entire summer and even including the dog days of
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summer, we had ice cream cake
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Nancy May: Well, I think that's pretty cool actually.
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It's called conservation
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Sylvia France: they wanted those ice cream cakes because
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they knew it would last longer
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Nancy May: So your mother bought it because she couldn't bake and?
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. Sylvia France: And I bought it even though I know I could.
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Two completely different reasons for the same ice cream cake
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Nancy May: And so
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? Sylvia France: Everybody says that the homemade one is the one that counts.
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So was my mother taking a shortcut or was she doing better than just trying?
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Nancy May: Well, let's hold that because I'm not sure you're
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gonna like the answer to that one
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Sylvia France: I've got a whole episode to sit here and worry about it
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Nancy May: Yes, you do.
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But because most of history, nobody was doing any of this before
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Sylvia France: So For most of human history, nobody
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even knew when they were born
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Nancy May: Yeah, nobody?
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That seems kinda weird
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Sylvia France: Well, it was actually just ordinary people.
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there was no system for writing it down unless you were royal or rich.
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The date just wasn't recorded anywhere
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Nancy May: So birthday was kind of a paperwork invention, I
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guess, like a birth certificate
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Sylvia France: Oh, genealogists love that, so we're glad we have birth
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certificates yes, it needed paperwork to exist, and the earliest celebration
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anybody points to isn't even a birth date
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Nancy May: So that seems kind of even more bizarre.
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So what is it?
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Sylvia France: Egypt, around 300 BC, a pharaoh gets crowned and
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and he's considered a reborn god.
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That's the anniversary that got written down
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Nancy May: Of course, the first birthday party was a promotion for a god or a guy.
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Sylvia France: um, always for a promotion, which I, you know, there's nothing
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wrong with that and hold that loosely.
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It's a popular history m- more than a really hard record
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Nancy May: So what's next?
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Sylvia France: Of course, the Romans.
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They actually throw the first party of an ordinary living person a
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sweet cake of flour, olive oil, and honey but again, for the men only.
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Dear
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Nancy May: Where's Abigail
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Sylvia France: I know we miss her.
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I know
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Nancy May: Here's the part that I didn't expect, though.
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The early Christian church banned birthdays just totally and outright
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. They were pagan, astrology, protective spirits, all of it
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Sylvia France: That's one reason.
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What's the other?
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Nancy May: Well,
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origin, a theologian or teacher way back when argued that you were actually born
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into sin so the day you were born is a day you really should mourn, not celebrate
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Sylvia France: That is so stark, even for the third century
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Nancy May: I know, right?
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And they mark the day a saint died instead.
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but the real birthday is the one that you were born into heaven
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Sylvia France: So your death day was considered your birthday?
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That's kinda weird
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Nancy May: not.
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I don't wanna start there.
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But that's our two parties from the top of the show, Pharaoh's
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baker and yes, John the Baptist
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Sylvia France: And Ending in execution, if those are your only examples on
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record, you're not throwing one either
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Nancy May: No, I'm not.
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so let's talk about when it all turns around
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Sylvia France: It's Christmas, more or less.
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You know, the most wonderful time of the year.
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Once the church puts a birth on the calendar for Jesus,
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birthdays stop looking suspicious
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Nancy May: So hold on just a second because there's a version that you
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definitely heard and it's not true
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Sylvia France: Oh, please do tell.
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Which one?
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Nancy May: Well, the not true one is, of course, with the ancient Greeks.
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And the Greeks made a round cake for Artemis, the goddess of the moon, and
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put candles on the cake so the round cake would glow like the moon, and the
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smoke from the candles would carry your prayers up to heaven or to the gods
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Sylvia France: Well, I read this in about nine bazillion places.
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You know, I kind of like it since I am a moon child because I am Cancer
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Nancy May: Now, that's pretty sweet, but not so sweet for now.
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And so what's wrong with this?
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Sylvia France: And how is it wrong?
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Nancy May: Well, there's no documented link between the
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two cakes and our birthdays.
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One historian's flat-out assessment is that the Greek and the Roman
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origin has no support in the record.
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It is pure folklore
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Sylvia France: Not even in National Geographic?
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Nancy May: Nope.
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Their own piece admits that there is no direct record of candles
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being put on cakes for the gods
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Sylvia France: So where does this come from?
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Nancy May: Well, hold tight because fire was sacred in a lot of ancient places.
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That part is real.
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Everybody connected the dot that's plausible, and nobody ever could prove it
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Sylvia France: And it's enough story that it just kept traveling.
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If it's told 1,000 times, it
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becomes a
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Nancy May: A thousand… What they say, a lie told a thousand times
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become a truth for about a century now
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Sylvia France: So I have the answer.
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. 300 years ago, and demons
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Nancy May: Ooh, that sounds even more fun.
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Sylvia France: 18th century Germany, there's a children's
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celebration called Kinderfest or translated into Children's Festival
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Nancy May: And that's the one with the cake and the candles?
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Sylvia France: Cake, candles, music, games.
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One candle for each year, plus an extra one in the middle
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Nancy May: So what's that extra one for?
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Sylvia France: It's called Lebenslicht, the light of life
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Nancy May: Ooh, I like that one.
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That's such a lovely name, at least for a candle
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Sylvia France: It is until you hear why it's burning.
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you know that German studies professor at USF, Margit grieb ? She
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gets exactly quoted for this
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Nancy May: Ooh, so USF in Tampa?
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Sylvia France: Yes, it's 20 minutes from my kitchen and I know you are
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on the board of economics at USF.
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Nancy May: I am
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Sylvia France: She explains that people believe children were especially
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vulnerable on their birthday.
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That was the day evil spirits could reach them
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Nancy May: Ooh, that sounds like such a good story.
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So I guess the candles were kind of a protection
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Sylvia France: That's the read, but she's careful about it though.
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She calls the links to what we do now indirect, kind of
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a curvy, not a straight line
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Nancy May: Well since we're drinking Shirley Temples, unless they're spiked,
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we should be walking a straight line.
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So why don't you take me on that path?
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Sylvia France: So you light the bedtime and keep them burning all day.
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If one goes out, you replace it right then instantly
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Nancy May: So these candles are burning all day.
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That kind of sounds like pyrotechnics to me
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Sylvia France: All day .. and the smoke was the channel, .. A steady stream going
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up meant heaven had its eye on your child
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Nancy May: Ooh, and the cake is just sitting there?
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Sylvia France: The cake is just sitting there and nobody touches it.
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Even my brother would not take a bite, not until the sun
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goes down and danger's passed
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Nancy May: So a child gets to sit there, stare at a cake, and drool,
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the whole thing burning for 12 hours.
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Sounds like torture to me
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Sylvia France: Yes, they stare at a cake dripping with wax the entire day, but
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we know the story that my brother took a bite out of my pink birthday cake.
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Nancy May: No.
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Sylvia France: only one my mom, my only, the only one my mom
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made, he took a dab out of it
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Nancy May: Well, all right, I hope he got the toothpick out first,
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but the other one is a vigil
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Sylvia France: That's what it is.
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And then at sunset, the child makes a wish, blows them out,
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and finally gets a slice of cake
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Nancy May: Which is probably loaded with that wax and which is the only
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part that we actually kept today
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Sylvia France: We kept the last 30 seconds of it and threw the rest away.
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No more demons
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Nancy May: Yeah.
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Good.
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I like that part.
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Sylvia France: Birthday candles come from 18th century Germany where parents
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lit one candle for each of the child's life plus an extra one to grow on and
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kept them burning all day to protect the child from harm and evil spirits
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Nancy May: Well, that actually sounds sweet from a parent's perspective and
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it's a lot to hand a five-year-old
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Sylvia France: and that isn't even the earliest record of it
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Nancy May: so the earliest written record isn't a child's at all
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Sylvia France: Really?
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I was waiting for that.
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I knew , you had, had done some research
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Nancy May: I certainly did.
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Because back in May of 1746, no, I wasn't there , a guest named Andrew Frey
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writes up a birthday festival in Germany for Count Nicholas Ludwig von Zinzendorf
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Sylvia France: Say that three times.
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I'm so glad
15:43
Nancy May: Zinzendorf.
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I'm trying to get my German accent going here.
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Sylvia France: So what did Ray actually say?
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Nancy May: Well, a cake as big as any oven could bake it.
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It should have holes in according to the number of years of the person's age,
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and there had to be a candle in every hole, and especially one in the middle
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Sylvia France: That's our cake in 1746
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Nancy May: Correct.
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And some sources say that it was really 1747, so we'll just
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call it mid-'40s to stay honest.
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Because we are.
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Sylvia France: And here's what got me.
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Zinzendorf was actually a Moravian bishop
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Nancy May: So what does that have to do with it?
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Sylvia France: the Moravians came first, Pennsylvania then Old Salem in
16:26
North Carolina, which is my family's part of the world in both states
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Nancy May: So the first candles on record belonged to a church that
16:35
ended up in your backyard again.
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Sylvia France: Well, when your family gets here in the 1600s, what can I say?
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Somebody was carrying that across the ocean while my
16:45
people were already down there.
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And there's one more piece of this ritual with a story you won't believe, the song
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Nancy May: So what about the song?
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I'm presuming Happy Birthday?
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Sylvia France: Exactly.
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For most of your life, it was against the law to sing Happy Birthday
17:02
in a movie without paying for it
17:04
Nancy May: Ooh, some greedy SOB.
17:06
A actual law against singing Happy Birthday
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Sylvia France: Yes.
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… Can you believe it?
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The most sung song on the planet, and one company was pulling about $2
17:17
million a year off of royalties from it
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Nancy May: Whoa.
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Well, I just sang happy birthday to my dear friend Diane on the phone today.
17:26
I'm gonna check my wallet, but I don't even know how that's possible
17:30
'cause I don't have that money in it.
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Sylvia France: Well, back in a minute and we can figure out
17:34
why it's not in your wallet
17:36
Nancy May: So stay tuned.
17:37
We'll be right back
17:51
And we're back.
17:52
. And I was about to try and pull $2 million out of my, well, wallet.
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Sylvia France: It must be a big wallet
17:59
Nancy May: No.
18:00
Sylvia France: But in 1893, two sisters in Louisville, Kentucky Patty and Mildred
18:05
Hill were actually kindergarten teachers
18:07
Nancy May: Teachers
18:08
Sylvia France: Yeah, they wrote this little greeting song for their classroom.
18:12
It was not a birthday song at all.
18:13
It was a good morning song
18:15
Nancy May: So the birthday song was actually a song to say hello?
18:19
Sylvia France: Yeah, the tune is hello.
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. Somewhere in there, people swapped out the words, and by the 1930s, the birthday
18:25
version had taken over completely
18:28
Nancy May: So, and then somebody claims it, I'm gonna guess
18:32
Sylvia France: Absolutely.
18:34
A publisher called Sumi registers a copyright in 1935 that eventually
18:39
lands with Warner Chappell
18:42
Nancy May: Who actually starts charging for it?
18:44
And I'm gonna guess that teachers don't get a dime or an apple.
18:49
Sylvia France: no, they did not.
18:51
So they had , roughly 2 million a year earned in licensing.
18:54
Not when you sing it at your kitchen table.
18:56
It was film, television, and anything commercial
19:00
Nancy May: So that's actually why every chain restaurant has its own birthday
19:04
clapping song, and they don't sing the plain old Happy Birthday to You song
19:10
Sylvia France: No, but I do like the sombreros, which I did in-
19:13
make my ch- children endure.
19:15
Those places weren't being creative.
19:17
They were dodging an invoice
19:19
Nancy May: Oh, well, that's pretty sharp too.
19:22
I always assumed that that was a branding decision and not
19:25
a licensing decision, though
19:27
- Sylvia France: Everybody does.
19:28
It was a legal decision wearing a branding costume, and it
19:31
ran that way for many decades
19:34
Nancy May: So I'm presuming that it has ended
19:37
? Sylvia France: A documentary filmmaker sues them in 2013
19:42
Nancy May: And in 2000, and in 2015, a federal judge rules that the 1935
19:46
copyright only covered the actual piano arrangement, not the words
19:52
Sylvia France: so they made $2 million a year and they
19:54
never owned the lyrics at all
19:56
Nancy May: Yeah, I call that highway robbery, That's correct.
20:00
Warner/Chappell settled the next year for $14 million, , and the
20:04
song went into the public domain
20:06
Sylvia France: I could only guess how much they had collected by then
20:09
Nancy May: Well, I guess I can close my wallet now, . but it was apparently
20:13
$50 million by most estimates
20:16
Sylvia France: And it was all based on two school teachers who wrote
20:19
a hello song for five-year-olds
20:21
Nancy May: I know.
20:22
The most valuable four bars in music until a judge unwound the whole thing
20:27
Sylvia France: I do brand work for a living, and that one still gets
20:30
me, and I'm sure it does you too
20:32
Nancy May: Absolutely
20:33
. Sylvia France: Now the part that changed how I think about the whole day, because
20:36
we're not only the people doing this
20:39
Nancy May: No, we're not.
20:40
let's start with the one you keep bringing up
20:43
Sylvia France: Oh, it's Korea.
20:44
On birthday you eat miyeok-guk, seaweed soup.
20:47
I think it's kind of like miso soup
20:49
Nancy May: Yeah, but still, for breakfast?
20:51
I'll take pancakes instead, thank you
20:54
Sylvia France: Well, in Vietnam they have pho for breakfast,
20:56
so I guess it's an Asian thing.
20:58
Nancy May: I'm glad I'm in Florida.
21:01
, Sylvia France: here's why.
21:02
So on the day you were born, you ate what she ate.
21:05
The day points back to her as it should
21:08
Nancy May: So that reorders the entire birthday celebration
21:12
Sylvia France: It does.
21:13
We spend our birthday being celebrated, and they spend it remembering who
21:17
did the work and gave birth to them
21:19
Nancy May: So there's a question for your own mom, dear listener.
21:23
What did she eat the week that you were born, or the day you were born?
21:27
Sylvia France: Nobody ever asked that.
21:29
So ask it and write it down somewhere that isn't on your phone.
21:33
Okay, I admit I had a pastrami sandwich from an amazing deli
21:38
the week my oldest was born
21:40
Nancy May: Well, i'm gonna guess my mom was eating a snow cone
21:43
because I was born in a blizzard
21:44
I'm gonna be thinking about that for quite some time.
21:48
Sylvia France: Me too and guess what?
21:49
, China has two of these
21:51
Nancy May: So the first one is longevity noodles.
21:54
One single long noodle and you're not supposed to bite through it
21:58
Sylvia France: So what happens if you bite it?
22:00
Nancy May: Well, yeah.
22:01
Here's the deal.
22:02
.. Superstition says you're cutting your own life short if you
22:06
chop it or bite it in half.
22:07
So people actually carefully slurp, ah, very carefully to make sure that
22:16
their life doesn't get cut short
22:18
Sylvia France: And the second one is the one I love.
22:20
. Steam buns shaped and blushed to look like peaches for their elders
22:25
Nancy May: Well, we did a whole segment on peaches, didn't we?
22:28
Sylvia France: Oh yes, Father's Day, the fruit of immortality, , and here it is
22:32
again on grandmother's birthday table
22:35
Nancy May: Mine, mine is actually a lot less deep because we're
22:38
heading on over to Germany
22:39
Sylvia France: Again,
22:40
Nancy May: again
22:41
Sylvia France: where the rules I understand go backwards from ours
22:45
Nancy May: Well, you gotta tell me about backwards
22:48
Sylvia France: So you throw your own party.
22:50
You buy the drinks, and in a lot of places you bake your own cake and
22:54
carry it to work and the party itself
22:56
Nancy May: I might need the royalties from Happy Birthday for this one.
22:59
So we wouldn't survive that one.
23:03
and do not wish anybody a happy birthday early in Germany either, . because
23:07
in Greece and in Germany, wishing an early happy birthday is bad luck
23:12
Sylvia France: And I have absolutely done that, so apologies
23:15
to Matthew who lived in Athens
23:18
Nancy May: Well, you better stop it now.
23:20
But before we leave our world tour, you owe me the reason for the Shirley Temple
23:25
Sylvia France: I do, and it started somewhere strange.
23:28
There's no traditional birthday drink anywhere.
23:31
Nancy May: Okay, but , for 400 years of cake lore and folklore, a glass or a
23:36
drink has nothing to do with a birthday?
23:38
Sylvia France: Every list I found is just generic party booze or champagne
23:43
except one, the Shirley Temple
23:46
Nancy May: So, um, tell me more about that
23:49
Sylvia France: It was 1930s Hollywood.
23:51
The story goes she was out at dinner while the adults had cocktails
23:55
and she had nothing fun to sip
23:57
Nancy May: Of course she was Shirley Temple.
23:59
She was adorable.
24:00
She was always fun, so somebody had to make her something that she could enjoy
24:04
Sylvia France: Yes.
24:05
Ginger ale, grenadine, and a cherry.
24:07
And I do admit I've had them a couple times when my
24:10
grandfather took me out to dinner
24:12
Nancy May: And my folks used to always get one for my sister
24:14
and myself when we were out too.
24:16
And the three restaurants that claim it are Chasen's, the Brown Derby, and
24:21
the Royal Hawaiian, and nobody has ever actually settled who made it first
24:26
Sylvia France: And she loved it, presumably
24:29
Nancy May: No, she hated it.
24:31
She told NPR in 1986 that they were too sweet and she called
24:35
them in typical Shirley Temple style, "Ew, that's icky." She had
24:41
nothing to do with even inventing it
24:43
Sylvia France: So she spent her whole life being handed a drink she couldn't stand?
24:48
Nancy May: Well, she was polite about it at least every single time
24:52
Sylvia France: But look at what it actually is, the only drink
24:55
ever invented so a child could feel included at a grownup's table
24:59
Nancy May: Which is the same instinct as, the cake
25:02
Sylvia France: Same instinct as the whole day
25:04
. And the cake, when does a regular family actually get one?
25:08
Nancy May: This is the part I like because it's kind of economics.
25:11
Sugar and white flour were originally luxury goods.
25:14
A frosted cake was a rich person's object.
25:17
Sylvia France: Let me guess, until factories
25:20
Nancy May: Of course, it's always something like that.
25:23
Mass production drops the price of sugar, flour, and yes, baking powder,
25:27
and suddenly a middle class family can do what only the wealthy people did
25:32
Sylvia France: So the modern-day American birthday cake isn't ancient.
25:36
It's actually industrial
25:38
Nancy May: Yep, the cake is industrial, which is where
25:40
it gets a little complicated
25:43
Sylvia France: Oh, complicated how?
25:45
- Nancy May: Well, in 1950s, General Mills puts out a Betty Crocker mix or a
25:49
cake mix with an egg already in it, you know, the powdered kind, and all you
25:54
had to do was add water, mix, and bake.
25:56
That was the whole job
25:58
Sylvia France: It sounds like a runway hit to me
26:00
Nancy May: Well, you think you would've had one, but it kinda stalled,
26:03
so they bring in a psychologist named Ernst Dichter to find out why
26:08
Sylvia France: So what did he find?
26:10
Nancy May: Well, they should have called in the women first but he
26:13
found that women actually felt guilty.
26:15
It was too easy.
26:17
It didn't even feel like they were making anything or doing
26:19
anything special for their family
26:22
Sylvia France: So he takes it out because of psychology, not to save money
26:26
Nancy May: Correct.
26:27
He takes out the powdered egg and you have to crack a fresh one and add that egg,
26:31
and sales actually took off from there
26:34
Sylvia France: I have told that story in many pitch meetings
26:37
Nancy May: And but here's the bend then.
26:39
Because food historian Laura Shapiro looked at it and pointed
26:43
out what everybody leaves out
26:45
Sylvia France: Which is?
26:46
Nancy May: Well, fresh eggs just made the cakes taste better.
26:49
the complete mix, , the original one from the Betty Crocker stuck
26:52
to the pan and had kind of a poor texture and tasted too eggy, believe
26:57
it or not, with the powdered egg
26:59
Sylvia France: So it sounds like it was more of a chemistry
27:01
issue and not a psychology issue
27:03
Nancy May: Well, I think it might've been a little bit of both.
27:05
Because not General Mills, but now Pillsbury kept on doing the same
27:10
thing and sold the complete mix with no problem and did just fine
27:15
Sylvia France: That's really annoying, but I do believe it
27:19
Nancy May: I know it is annoying, But the tidy version is just a little too tidy
27:23
Sylvia France: But I'd argue it stuck around for 70 years because
27:26
it's pointing at something real
27:28
Nancy May: Which is what?
27:30
Sylvia France: That the egg was never the person eating the cake.
27:33
The egg is for the baker.
27:34
It's proof to yourself that you actually did something
27:38
Nancy May: Which is the answer to your question from minute four in the show.
27:42
You're not going to love it though.
27:44
Sylvia France: Uh-oh.
27:45
Say it though
27:47
Nancy May: Your mother skipped the part that was about her.
27:49
She went straight to the part that was really about you,
27:52
kind of like adding the egg
27:54
Sylvia France: Aw, that sounds so sweet.
27:57
And she can tell everybody how wonderful she was.
28:00
Nancy May: it's a mom thing.
28:02
She knew she wasn't a baker, so she knew exactly what her child or her daughter
28:06
wanted, and that wasn't a shortcut.
28:09
She was paying attention to you whether you knew it or not
28:12
Sylvia France: And I did it with a kitchen full of flour.
28:15
I could have made the boys anything, but I bought the one they
28:18
actually wanted, the ice cream cake
28:21
Nancy May: Correct.
28:21
So the gift was never the effort.
28:23
It was knowing who you were actually feeding and why
28:26
Sylvia France: that reframed the entire thing I believed walking in here
28:30
Nancy May: And it's why I wanna tell you about my dad, because this
28:34
is kind of like the same story, but from a different side of life.
28:38
It starts with his 98th birthday
28:41
Sylvia France: Your dad, you've told the stories, and you love him so much
28:45
Nancy May: I do, and I'm gonna tell it to everybody here.
28:47
Because my dad, well, we did the whole thing.
28:51
Everybody was there.
28:52
98th birthday, although he thought it was 99.
28:56
There was champagne, and we had a house full of people
28:59
Sylvia France: So I only can guess how much champagne there was
29:03
Nancy May: Well, it was gonna be a big hoopla, and it was.
29:07
So I was in charge of the glasses, and I kept everybody's full.
29:11
Sylvia France: Nancy
29:12
Nancy May: Yes, including Dad's.
29:14
He was, after all, 98, and at the end of the night, he leans over to Millie,
29:19
our lead aide, and says very quietly, "I think I'm just a little drunk."
29:28
Sylvia France: I love it.
29:29
He turned himself in
29:31
Nancy May: Well, kind of.
29:32
He did turn himself in and she got him to bed safely, 'cause he did ask for help.
29:37
And then the girls and I kept going after everybody else was asleep and
29:41
had gone, still toasting him and my mom
29:44
Sylvia France: It sounds like the good kind of a long night and a long day
29:48
Nancy May: Oh, it was.
29:50
We've got other stories from that night too.
29:52
But there was also birthday 99
29:56
Sylvia France: Oh, how could it be better than 98?
29:58
Nancy May: Well, first of all, he had a 99th birthday.
30:01
That was a good one.
30:02
But he was in the hospital that morning that he turned 99, in cardiac
30:07
care, and that was the last time he was ever there in the hospital.
30:12
Kind of thank goodness and not so.
30:14
Sylvia France: Oh, Nancy
30:15
Nancy May: I know, but the nurses on that unit were just incredibly
30:20
special, and nobody asked them.
30:23
They went out on their own and they bought him a birthday cake, a card which they
30:27
all signed, and a big bouquet of balloons
30:31
Sylvia France: How amazing it was on their own
30:34
Nancy May: They did.
30:34
And they found out somewhere, somehow, that chocolate was my
30:38
dad's favorite, so they went out and they got him a chocolate cake, the
30:42
most delicious chocolate cake ever.
30:45
And they all came into the room and sang him a big happy birthday
30:50
Sylvia France: Those nurses were amazing that they did that
30:52
Nancy May: They were.
30:53
They did that, and I'm telling you, that was the best chocolate
30:56
cake and probably one of the best birthday memories I've ever had
31:00
Sylvia France: I don't think it had really anything to do with the chocolate cake
31:04
Nancy May: No, it wasn't about the cake.
31:06
for sure
31:07
Sylvia France: They found out that chocolate was his favorite.
31:09
That's the whole thing right here.
31:10
They cared about your dad before they even bought the cake
31:14
Nancy May: Yes.
31:15
And that's the part, like I said, I'll always remember and the look
31:19
on his face, as tired as he was
31:21
Sylvia France: which brings us back around because this is our 100th episode
31:27
Nancy May: And it turns out 100 is a real milestone and real rituals attached.
31:33
You know, Dad said he wanted to get to 120.
31:36
I think we've got a few more in our shows, don't you, Sylvia?
31:40
Sylvia France: I think we're gonna make it to 220, to be honest
31:44
Nancy May: and more.
31:44
So what happens next?
31:47
Sylvia France: So can you tell me a little bit about what happens when
31:51
somebody actually does turn 100?
31:53
Nancy May: Well, in the UK you get a letter from the monarch.
31:56
Well, in this case, it's now King Charles, and you have to apply.
32:00
It's not automatic
32:02
Sylvia France: Here in the States, you can request a greeting card signed by
32:05
the president, but Ireland is the one I love because you get paid to be 100
32:10
Nancy May: Ooh, I think we need to sign up for that one.
32:14
But who pays you?
32:16
Sylvia France: It's called The Centurion Bounty: A Letter From
32:18
the President and 2,540 Euro
32:22
Nancy May: Ooh, for being alive?
32:24
or maybe having 100 podcasts.
32:27
And every year thereafter, , they send you a commemorative
32:29
coin, a new design each year
32:32
Sylvia France: And there's a practical problem at that age
32:35
Nancy May: You can't put 100 candles lit on a cake.
32:38
At least it's a hard one.
32:40
The frosting melts into kind of.
32:42
A fire hazard
32:43
Sylvia France: So what do people do?
32:45
Can they buy something on Amazon?
32:47
Nancy May: Well, pretty close.
32:48
There's actually a product for it.
32:49
It's a tiered stand that goes around the cake, and yes, it
32:53
actually holds 100 candles safely.
32:56
We're gonna have to find that and do one ourselves.
32:58
… Sylvia France: So , it sounds like someone built a scaffolding for candles
33:02
. Nancy May: Yes, scaffolding … Because we're not giving up on fire for sure
33:07
Sylvia France: So five things to take with you, and we're trading them here
33:11
Nancy May: One, light the extra candle, one per year plus one for the year ahead
33:15
Sylvia France: That's called Lebenslicht, the light of life.
33:18
10 seconds to explain it to a kid, and they'll remember it,
33:21
Nancy May: Two, if anybody tells you your birthday candles came from
33:25
the ancient Greeks they are wrong
33:28
Sylvia France: Nope, it's 18th century Germany, and it's worth remembering how
33:32
far a good story travels with nothing under it, good folklore or bended spoon
33:38
Nancy May: Three, ask your mother what she ate the week you were born
33:41
Sylvia France: That's the Korean idea.
33:43
The day points back at her.
33:44
Ask it.
33:45
Write the answer down somewhere permanent.
33:47
You know, paper and ink
33:49
Nancy May: Mm, or our book.
33:50
and four, don't wish anybody happy birthday early.
33:53
In Germany and Greece, both count as really bad luck
33:57
Sylvia France: And if you're the birthday person over there, you're hosting.
34:00
You buy the drinks and you bring the cake
34:02
Nancy May: You might need those royalties.
34:05
Five, stop asking whether you made it or anybody else made it.
34:09
Ask who it was for
34:10
Sylvia France: My mother couldn't bake, so she bought the cake.
34:13
I can bake, and I still bought an ice cream cake
34:16
Nancy May: And the nurses bought the chocolate cake because
34:19
they found out what he loved
34:20
Sylvia France: The gift was never the effort.
34:22
- People get what they actually want, and when somebody does it for you, say thank
34:27
you first, even if it's falling apart
34:29
Nancy May: For sure.
34:30
So the next time anybody asks you why we put candles on a cake
34:34
Sylvia France: It isn't Greek and it isn't about the moon.
34:37
It's 300 years old, it's German, and it started out with a shield from the demons
34:44
Nancy May: We should probably do this for an October show instead.
34:47
But here's our 100th episode ask of you.
34:50
Tell us about your cake and your birthday stories
34:53
.. Sylvia France: Tell us about the one that fell apart, the one that somebody stayed
34:57
all night to make, the one you still make, and the one that someone truly appreciated
35:02
Nancy May: And send it to us on our show page at podcast@familytreefoodstories,
35:07
or post it in our Facebook group also, Family Tree Food Stories.
35:10
we read every one.
35:12
We'd love to put your story on the next show
35:15
… Sylvia France: You wanted to write it down somewhere first, possibly in our
35:18
book, Family Tree Food and Stories, but it's important that it's somewhere
35:22
permanent for when you're done talking
35:25
Nancy May: And if this show has been in your kitchen, which we hope, or in your
35:28
ears in your car while you're driving, any part of these 100 episodes, send it
35:33
to somebody else that you know likes a good story and, yes, something delicious.
35:38
It can be your gift to them because it's our gift to you
35:41
Sylvia France: That's the present.
35:43
Glasses up
35:44
Nancy May: Glasses up to 100 episodes,
35:46
Or to anyone who poured an extra glass of champagne for their dad.
35:51
And to the ones who told them that they love them and that they're beautiful.
35:55
And next week we're talking about, yes, Peter Pepped up Pickled Peppers.
36:00
Say that three times fast.
36:02
Sylvia France: That really sounds like maybe a stinky
36:04
but a harmless episode to me
36:07
Nancy May: Well, here's the problem.
36:08
A lot of what you will read about, where pickles comes from was written by a
36:13
trade association, and there's a lot more
36:16
Sylvia France: Written by the industry.
36:18
That's not the first story I've heard about that
36:20
Nancy May: No, no, no.
36:22
and then reprinted as history by outlets you don't trust.
36:26
Stay tuned because we found the marketing copy that traces back on this one.
36:32
So, as we always like to say, every meal has a story, and every story's a feast
36:38
Sylvia France: And a few secrets along the way.
36:40
So bye everyone.
36:42
Thank you so much for listening to our 100th episode.
36:45
Happy cooking and happy experimenting
36:48
Nancy May: Bye-bye.
36:50
Till next time.
36:51
Cheers.