Latest / Scotty and Abby UNFILTERED / Did Abby get "Irish Goodbye'd" by this man on Hinge?!?!
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Goodby's best music.
- 0:02Speaker 2: Is Jadge and welcome to another episode of Scotty Abbey Unfiltered.
- 0:07Speaker 2: This is the first time in a long time we
- 0:09Speaker 2: haven't had a guest in the studio with us, right.
- 0:10Speaker 1: I know, we've had so many friends in recently.
- 0:12Speaker 3: So what has been going on with you, Abby? What's
- 0:14Speaker 3: happening in your life?
- 0:15Speaker 2: Oh?
- 0:15Speaker 1: Just everything, so much.
- 0:18Speaker 4: I had an insane experience this weekend that made me
- 0:21Speaker 4: realize that men in Tampa Bay are actually evil.
- 0:23Speaker 3: Oh God, do you want to talk? Yeah, I'll tell
- 0:27Speaker 3: you what happened.
- 0:28Speaker 4: So I decided to go visit my friend in Nashville
- 0:32Speaker 4: this weekend. My therapist is like, you've got to get
- 0:34Speaker 4: out of Tampa.
- 0:34Speaker 1: You've got to like go.
- 0:36Speaker 4: Visit friends, You've got to reconnect with nature, go touch grass.
- 0:38Speaker 1: And so naturally I went to Broadway and on Friday,
- 0:42Speaker 1: I did like an early.
- 0:43Speaker 4: Bedtime because you know, I'd be like, wake up, get
- 0:45Speaker 4: ready to go, fly out to Nashville. And I ended
- 0:49Speaker 4: up matching with this guy on Saturday morning that I
- 0:53Speaker 4: had seen a couple of times on the app before,
- 0:55Speaker 4: Like I had seen him once or twice and he
- 0:57Speaker 4: had never liked me. And I try not to like
- 0:59Speaker 4: like a bunch of guys, especially if I've seen them
- 1:02Speaker 4: were I'm just like, okay, you're obviously seeing my profile,
- 1:04Speaker 4: and so if you're not liking me, I'm just kind
- 1:06Speaker 4: of not interested.
- 1:06Speaker 3: Correct, So he likes me.
- 1:08Speaker 4: We ended up having this very casual conversation that honestly
- 1:12Speaker 4: was just keeping me company while I was flying to Nashville,
- 1:16Speaker 4: and a lot of the stuff that he said was
- 1:18Speaker 4: just like really nice, very normal.
- 1:20Speaker 1: He's cute.
- 1:21Speaker 4: So I'm like, okay, this guy just seems like a normal,
- 1:22Speaker 4: good dude. I'll read some of the messages.
- 1:24Speaker 2: I already hate this. I don't know if anybody else like.
- 1:26Speaker 2: I just got chills because I'm like, yeah, ah, here
- 1:29Speaker 2: we go, Like all right, go ahead.
- 1:30Speaker 1: So Saturday, two fifteen pm we match. He says, that
- 1:34Speaker 1: was the longest wait.
- 1:34Speaker 4: Of my life, Abby, And I said, and yet you
- 1:36Speaker 4: survived and he said just about. He said, how's the
- 1:39Speaker 4: Tampa Hinge experience going, which is going to foreshadow the
- 1:42Speaker 4: ending of the story. I said, mmmm, it's like three stars.
- 1:45Speaker 4: It could be better. I said, are you here to
- 1:47Speaker 4: improve the experience? And he said, tell me the horror stories?
- 1:51Speaker 4: Oh okay, I can definitely improve the experience, and I said,
- 1:54Speaker 4: they're definitely more entertaining a person, that's for sure.
- 1:56Speaker 1: So I said that I'm on the plane.
- 1:58Speaker 4: I'm like in the uber to my friend's house, Like
- 2:01Speaker 4: this is just kind of us going back.
- 2:02Speaker 2: And forth as it's flirty so far, like, I'm actually
- 2:05Speaker 2: very impressed with y'all flirting game.
- 2:06Speaker 1: Yeah, very normal, very flirty.
- 2:08Speaker 4: And so then right as I'm going out to happy
- 2:10Speaker 4: hour with my friends, he sends me a voice memo,
- 2:12Speaker 4: which I kind of rolled my eyes at because this
- 2:14Speaker 4: guy's Irish. So I'm like, oh my god, he probably
- 2:16Speaker 4: doesn't all the girls because they know girls love an
- 2:18Speaker 4: accent or whatever. And so I'm out and about with
- 2:22Speaker 4: my friends and so I'm like, I can't just like
- 2:23Speaker 4: listen to this voice memo. It's like loud out, Like
- 2:25Speaker 4: I'd love to listen to it, but like the music
- 2:27Speaker 4: is blasting. We're in the middle of some other side conversation.
- 2:31Speaker 1: So we go out.
- 2:33Speaker 4: We have a great time on Broadway. My friend Taylor
- 2:35Speaker 4: and I go back to her apartment. It's like three am.
- 2:37Speaker 4: We're eating pizza, we're hammered, and I go, oh my god,
- 2:39Speaker 4: I forgot I got this voice memo from this guy
- 2:41Speaker 4: I've been talking to. He's like this cute irishman, Like,
- 2:43Speaker 4: let's see.
- 2:44Speaker 3: What he said.
- 2:45Speaker 1: So I listen to the voice memo and we're both
- 2:48Speaker 1: just like giddy.
- 2:49Speaker 4: He has a great voice. The accent is just the
- 2:51Speaker 4: right amount of Irish. It's not like it's not giving Leprechaun.
- 2:54Speaker 3: It's it's giving.
- 2:57Speaker 1: It's it's just giving, like cute Irish.
- 3:00Speaker 3: Yes.
- 3:01Speaker 4: And what's crazy is he said, Hey, Abby, so good
- 3:04Speaker 4: to connect with you, big voice memo guy, I'd love
- 3:07Speaker 4: to take you out sometime this week.
- 3:09Speaker 1: I'm actually really busy this weekend. I'm actually in Nashville.
- 3:12Speaker 4: And I go, that's kind of crazy because I hadn't
- 3:17Speaker 4: been public about me being in Nashville. So I'm like,
- 3:21Speaker 4: this guy's obviously in Nashville because I didn't really post anything.
- 3:23Speaker 4: I posted something later that night, but he had sent
- 3:25Speaker 4: this voice memo before yes, And so I'm like, that's
- 3:28Speaker 4: so crazy. Like we're both in Nashville and me and
- 3:30Speaker 4: my friend are both sitting here like so freaking giddy.
- 3:33Speaker 1: We're like, this is fay. This is the cutest thing.
- 3:36Speaker 1: I wish I had listened to it earlier.
- 3:38Speaker 4: We totally could have met this guy out and so
- 3:42Speaker 4: me and I message him back and I say, that's
- 3:44Speaker 4: so crazy.
- 3:45Speaker 1: I'm actually in Nashville.
- 3:46Speaker 3: Lol.
- 3:46Speaker 1: I said, I fly out of BNA tomorrow to Tampa.
- 3:49Speaker 4: And he goes, haha, no way, what flight. Not sure,
- 3:52Speaker 4: I'm in a good state to see you on a plane.
- 3:53Speaker 4: And I said same. Lol.
- 3:55Speaker 1: This is the next day.
- 3:56Speaker 4: I said, I'm barely holding it together at brunch right now,
- 3:58Speaker 4: which kind of a lie. Look, I was totally I said,
- 4:00Speaker 4: I'm on the American Airlines two pm flight, and he goes,
- 4:03Speaker 4: for fuck's sake, we can have our first date on.
- 4:05Speaker 1: The plane, And I said, you're kidding.
- 4:07Speaker 3: Lol.
- 4:08Speaker 4: So then he sends another voice memo and he just
- 4:10Speaker 4: sounds like just so normal. He's like, this is so crazy,
- 4:14Speaker 4: Like I how cool would it be if we could
- 4:16Speaker 4: like have our first date on the plane.
- 4:17Speaker 1: We can like sit with each other. But if not,
- 4:19Speaker 1: like I'm going to send you some snacks or whatever.
- 4:21Speaker 4: And me and Me and Taylor are literally sitting in
- 4:23Speaker 4: twelve South Nashville. We had just gone to La La Land,
- 4:26Speaker 4: this cool coffee shop. We had some banana cloud lattes
- 4:29Speaker 4: and we're just having like the best day.
- 4:31Speaker 1: I was like Taylor, life is worth living.
- 4:33Speaker 4: Because one of the reasons that I'm in Nashville is
- 4:37Speaker 4: because my therapist had given me this advice that she's like,
- 4:39Speaker 4: you just need to go hang out with your friends
- 4:42Speaker 4: that know and love you, Like you just need to
- 4:44Speaker 4: go see your friends, go to your favorite places.
- 4:46Speaker 1: You love your best friend Virginia.
- 4:48Speaker 4: So we went to go to five Sauce this week
- 4:49Speaker 4: to go see a big concert that I love, and
- 4:51Speaker 4: then I made plans to see Taylor in Nashville. Nasville's
- 4:54Speaker 4: one of my favorite places. And I said, you know what,
- 4:56Speaker 4: like Veronica was right, like I just needed to like
- 4:59Speaker 4: reconnect with nature. Don't kill yourself. You don't need lexapro.
- 5:02Speaker 4: You just need an irishman to tell you that he
- 5:04Speaker 4: wants to hang out with you. Yes, so fix he
- 5:08Speaker 4: says all these things, and I said, that's so wild.
- 5:10Speaker 4: I'm in fourteen f I'm a big window seat gal.
- 5:13Speaker 4: And he says, I love an aisle seat. I think
- 5:15Speaker 4: I'm in row twenty two And I said, oh my god,
- 5:17Speaker 4: it's a long distance relationship. And he said, I'll send
- 5:19Speaker 4: ask them to send you some snacks. What flight did
- 5:21Speaker 4: you get over, I said, Wall Chivalry's not dead. I
- 5:23Speaker 4: actually flew up yesterday, just a quick jaunt on Southwest,
- 5:26Speaker 4: and then he just quickly jumped over and said, where
- 5:29Speaker 4: do you live in Tampa? Which I thought was a
- 5:30Speaker 4: little weird because I'm like, you can see it in
- 5:32Speaker 4: my profile that I live on blah blah blah blah blah,
- 5:34Speaker 4: and he goes, I would die for a coffee at
- 5:37Speaker 4: the coffee shop there right now. And I had waited
- 5:39Speaker 4: a couple hours after this, because Taylor was like, you
- 5:42Speaker 4: gotta gotta chill out for a second, like, give some space,
- 5:45Speaker 4: let me yearn a little bit, and so about. He
- 5:48Speaker 4: sent that at eleven fifty one, and then at one fifteen,
- 5:52Speaker 4: I'm like, all on the way to the airport, I say, haha, yeah,
- 5:56Speaker 4: it always hits after a rowdy weekend. And then I
- 6:00Speaker 4: it's the airport and he hasn't texted me, and I'm like, well,
- 6:02Speaker 4: maybe I'll see him at the gate, Like maybe I'll
- 6:04Speaker 4: I'll see him and he'll be like hey, or maybe
- 6:05Speaker 4: he'll text me when he gets the gate. So I'm
- 6:07Speaker 4: at the gate, I'm charging my phone. I'm waiting for
- 6:09Speaker 4: him to text me, and in the back of my mind,
- 6:11Speaker 4: I go, you know, I kind of knew he was
- 6:14Speaker 4: probably lying about this, but it would just be so
- 6:17Speaker 4: crazy if he did. And so I'm sitting at the
- 6:20Speaker 4: airport gate and then I get I don't see him
- 6:23Speaker 4: at the airport gate. I get on the plane. I
- 6:25Speaker 4: don't really see him on the plane. Granted he's ten
- 6:27Speaker 4: rows back, so maybe I just don't see him. And
- 6:29Speaker 4: I'm sitting in my row and I decide to text
- 6:33Speaker 4: him and I just said, fourteen f is seriously lacking
- 6:37Speaker 4: snacks for real, And he immediately responded, like, I send
- 6:40Speaker 4: that at like three forty five.
- 6:41Speaker 1: He sends it.
- 6:42Speaker 4: Two minutes later. He goes, and I hate, this is
- 6:44Speaker 4: so dumb, but he goes, you are the snack abby.
- 6:46Speaker 4: I'm like, shut up, literally, like where are you? And
- 6:48Speaker 4: he said, I paid for them to give you some
- 6:49Speaker 4: pretzels and a drink. Don't say I don't look after you,
- 6:51Speaker 4: and I said, damn. Getting wined and dined already, just
- 6:55Speaker 4: kind of trying to open up the conversation, like, hey,
- 6:57Speaker 4: we're both on this plane allegedly, like allegedly we're both
- 7:01Speaker 4: on this plane. And the plane lands, I look back
- 7:05Speaker 4: and I'm trying to like just sort of casually see
- 7:08Speaker 4: I'm just sort of like just trying to like look
- 7:10Speaker 4: back to see if he's back there. I don't see anything.
- 7:12Speaker 4: Granted again, there's a lot of people on this flight.
- 7:14Speaker 4: I get off the plane, and I'm like, surely if
- 7:17Speaker 4: he was on this flight, he would say something to me.
- 7:19Speaker 4: I'm gonna bump into him on the train because you
- 7:22Speaker 4: have to take a shuttle from the airport terminal to
- 7:25Speaker 4: baggage claim or whatever at TPA.
- 7:26Speaker 1: I'm like, surely I'm gonna see him on the shuttle.
- 7:28Speaker 1: He's gonna see me.
- 7:30Speaker 4: I have not heard from this man since the flight,
- 7:33Speaker 4: and which for me is confirmation that he was not
- 7:35Speaker 4: on the plane.
- 7:36Speaker 1: And I'm just like, what was the reason, Like, really,
- 7:40Speaker 1: what was the point?
- 7:41Speaker 4: You didn't I already told you I was gonna go
- 7:43Speaker 4: out with you. You didn't have to lie that you
- 7:45Speaker 4: were on this plane. You knew I was gonna be
- 7:48Speaker 4: on the plane, So why would you lie knowing you
- 7:52Speaker 4: were gonna get caught? Now you just look like a
- 7:54Speaker 4: shady motherfucker. Yeah, it's just to make like did you
- 7:57Speaker 4: just want me to feel stupid? Did you want me
- 7:59Speaker 4: to feel And then I was like, did he know
- 8:02Speaker 4: I was in Nashville somehow, like I hadn't posted about it,
- 8:05Speaker 4: but like, I don't know, maybe he's a Magic ninety
- 8:07Speaker 4: four to nine listener. I went to go see if
- 8:09Speaker 4: we had any mutuals. We have like one mutual. I'm like,
- 8:11Speaker 4: maybe he knows that girl and she said something. It
- 8:14Speaker 4: was just the most bizarre experience, and I'm just me
- 8:16Speaker 4: and Taylor are literally texting back and forth.
- 8:18Speaker 1: We're like, he did all of that for what?
- 8:21Speaker 3: Like, what's what's the get out of all that thing?
- 8:24Speaker 3: That's what I don't get.
- 8:25Speaker 1: What is the get? I don't get what the get is.
- 8:28Speaker 3: The only way I could look at it is well,
- 8:30Speaker 3: and this is not the only way. This is a
- 8:31Speaker 3: couple of ways. But the first one is if he
- 8:34Speaker 3: was trying to.
- 8:35Speaker 2: Be slowly I don't know, like really stupidly flirty, yeah,
- 8:38Speaker 2: thinking that you knew obviously that he wasn't on the plane.
- 8:41Speaker 2: And I was like, oh, we're just playing along this game.
- 8:43Speaker 2: But I think what a lot of guys forget is
- 8:45Speaker 2: the other side is so human, Like your response to
- 8:48Speaker 2: that is so human.
- 8:49Speaker 3: You get excited.
- 8:49Speaker 2: You're like, Okay, I wonder if I'm gonna see this person.
- 8:51Speaker 2: You kind of look down, You're like, well, I don't know.
- 8:53Speaker 2: Maybe I could see him on the terminal, mayor I
- 8:55Speaker 2: could see him on the plane. And to put somebody
- 8:57Speaker 2: through those games, m hmm is quite honestly, and just
- 9:01Speaker 2: explicits are in the podcast, So I will go ahead.
- 9:04Speaker 3: It's fucked up.
- 9:05Speaker 2: It's so messed up because that messes with somebody's psyche
- 9:08Speaker 2: like you may and again, nobody else knows, but in
- 9:11Speaker 2: your head you feel like I'm the biggest fool. Yeah,
- 9:14Speaker 2: I feel like an idiot for even getting excited or
- 9:16Speaker 2: getting my hopes up. And it's like what I hate
- 9:18Speaker 2: about that is and it's You're not alone in this feeling,
- 9:21Speaker 2: but like a lot of us get you get your
- 9:23Speaker 2: hopes up so many times and eventually like, well fuck it,
- 9:25Speaker 2: I'm not gonna get my hopes up anymore because every
- 9:27Speaker 2: time I do, I always have this feeling of I
- 9:29Speaker 2: feel like shit, Like you've made me feel like shit?
- 9:32Speaker 2: So why am I even gonna go ahead and entertain
- 9:34Speaker 2: somebody that might be the right one?
- 9:35Speaker 3: Yeah? And then after that you haven't heard anything like
- 9:38Speaker 3: literally as we're in it.
- 9:39Speaker 4: The next day, Yeah, it's eight thirty four, and I thought, okay,
- 9:42Speaker 4: maybe he'll text me and be like, oh, I finally
- 9:44Speaker 4: got home.
- 9:45Speaker 1: Maybe he was on a different flight. I don't know.
- 9:47Speaker 1: It's just bizarre, Like it's actually just weirdo behavior.
- 9:50Speaker 3: Correct.
- 9:51Speaker 4: And I think what you said is so spot on
- 9:54Speaker 4: in the sense that it's like it's so hard and
- 9:58Speaker 4: it's so annoying to constantly like put yourself out there
- 10:01Speaker 4: and get excited about things for people just to to
- 10:04Speaker 4: almost go out of their way to let you down,
- 10:07Speaker 4: you know what I mean. It's not like I was
- 10:09Speaker 4: clinging and like I really like this guy and I
- 10:12Speaker 4: really wanted to work out and it didn't. It's like
- 10:14Speaker 4: you literally just lied to me over hinge for hours
- 10:18Speaker 4: for no reason.
- 10:20Speaker 1: And I'm like, are you entertained by this? Do you
- 10:23Speaker 1: think this is funny? Like did you think this was
- 10:26Speaker 1: being flirty?
- 10:27Speaker 4: It just makes no sense to me to the point
- 10:29Speaker 4: where I'm like, you know what, Like it's not even
- 10:31Speaker 4: so much that like dating is hard, it's just like
- 10:33Speaker 4: the men are actually evil.
- 10:34Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 10:34Speaker 2: I like as when you first said that in the beginning,
- 10:36Speaker 2: I was like, oh God, I don't know what that
- 10:38Speaker 2: actually is evil, Like if your intentions and I'd be
- 10:40Speaker 2: so curious and never will happen. But to hear that
- 10:42Speaker 2: perspective of like you're just playing a game.
- 10:45Speaker 1: You did all this for what?
- 10:46Speaker 4: And I was so mad because I had like no
- 10:47Speaker 4: airport outfits. So we were in twelve South and Taylor
- 10:51Speaker 4: and I were like, this is so fun, Like you're
- 10:52Speaker 4: gonna go on a day later, like you gotta figure
- 10:54Speaker 4: out what you're gonna wear. Oh, we had to like
- 10:56Speaker 4: find so I was like, I need like a T
- 10:58Speaker 4: shirt or a sweatshirt or somebody to wear for my leggings,
- 11:00Speaker 4: because literally I was ready to go on this plane
- 11:02Speaker 4: like full gremlin mode, like hungover, like just ready to
- 11:05Speaker 4: like sleep on the plane and call it a day.
- 11:07Speaker 1: And so now I'm like in.
- 11:08Speaker 4: These thrift stores trying to be like I just need
- 11:10Speaker 4: like a jacket to put on over this, spend money
- 11:12Speaker 4: on a jacket, show up like I wouldn't put on
- 11:14Speaker 4: makeup if I.
- 11:15Speaker 1: Didn't think I was meeting somebody there, correct, And.
- 11:17Speaker 4: Now I'm sitting there feeling like a fool in the
- 11:20Speaker 4: head dress, being like what the hell is going on?
- 11:22Speaker 2: Yeah? And I think it's like you know you've seen
- 11:24Speaker 2: in movies all the time. It's like you get already, yeah,
- 11:26Speaker 2: you have the.
- 11:26Speaker 3: Music going, you have that feeling, you're excited, and then
- 11:29Speaker 3: like literally never get the goal. You never get the text.
- 11:31Speaker 3: Nobody comes up to the door and knocks.
- 11:32Speaker 2: And I think when you see somebody go through that,
- 11:34Speaker 2: or you go through that yourself, h huh, you never
- 11:36Speaker 2: want that feeling to be on somebody else. Yeah, And
- 11:38Speaker 2: I think that's just I don't know who this dude
- 11:41Speaker 2: is and who he thinks he is to be able
- 11:42Speaker 2: to do that to somebody.
- 11:43Speaker 3: But that's the part that's so messed up.
- 11:44Speaker 2: Like at the end of the day, if you're there
- 11:46Speaker 2: for games like you were effing up other people' psyche,
- 11:49Speaker 2: like you're providing trauma and that and itself is emil.
- 11:53Speaker 4: I gotta traumatize them back. I'm like, I gotta put
- 11:54Speaker 4: this man on blasts on Instagram or something.
- 11:57Speaker 2: I mean, look, as I'm not against the idea because
- 12:01Speaker 2: at a certain point you have to face the music,
- 12:04Speaker 2: you have to face the consequence.
- 12:06Speaker 3: Yeah, because how many other people are you gonna do
- 12:08Speaker 3: that too?
- 12:08Speaker 1: Because it's just malicious at this point, and that's weird.
- 12:10Speaker 4: I think as I had seen him on Hinge before,
- 12:12Speaker 4: I wondered, I was like, Okay, this guy's got to
- 12:14Speaker 4: be a little weird if he's still on the apps
- 12:16Speaker 4: after all this time, because if you're like a normal,
- 12:18Speaker 4: well adjusted dude, you'll probably find some girl to date
- 12:20Speaker 4: you for two or three months.
- 12:22Speaker 1: So when I see guys consistently on the.
- 12:24Speaker 4: Apps, I'm like, Okay, I got to check the Facebook pages.
- 12:26Speaker 4: I got to see if somebody said something about him.
- 12:27Speaker 4: Yet he's not on on any of the Facebook pages.
- 12:30Speaker 4: So I'm like, I want to post and be like,
- 12:32Speaker 4: what other teas on this guy? Like I matched this guy.
- 12:35Speaker 4: I just had the most bizarre experience. Am I alone here?
- 12:39Speaker 4: Like this is this guy like purposely just trying to
- 12:42Speaker 4: piss me off? Or has he been a menace to
- 12:44Speaker 4: other girls in Tampa?
- 12:45Speaker 2: Yeah, because you're honestly looking out for them at the
- 12:47Speaker 2: end of the day, Like I'm protecting you from just
- 12:48Speaker 2: going through what like the I just I don't know,
- 12:51Speaker 2: like my heart that does actually make my heart hurt. Yeah,
- 12:53Speaker 2: Like the think of the excitement that's built, the conversations
- 12:55Speaker 2: that are have and then you're just like on the
- 12:56Speaker 2: other end of it, like hah, I'm just growing around
- 13:00Speaker 2: under a couple of messages like dude, grow up at
- 13:02Speaker 2: a certain point, how old is he?
- 13:03Speaker 4: Can?
- 13:03Speaker 3: I ask, Oh, let's see.
- 13:04Speaker 4: I think he's my age, Like, I don't remember there
- 13:06Speaker 4: being like a weird age gap. Okay, he's twenty nine,
- 13:10Speaker 4: grow up, normal looking dude. The voice notes were very
- 13:13Speaker 4: normal sounding, and I was like, oh, it's like a
- 13:15Speaker 4: normal human.
- 13:15Speaker 1: He sounds very like well adjusted, normal jobs.
- 13:20Speaker 2: It's weird that he like again, like, I guess that's
- 13:23Speaker 2: the evil part too, Like it would be flirty if
- 13:25Speaker 2: it was like, yeah, no way.
- 13:26Speaker 3: I'm on sea twenty two. Nah, that'd be crazy, just joking.
- 13:30Speaker 2: But like I acknowledge the joke if it's a joke,
- 13:33Speaker 2: acknowledge that you're flirting, if it's flirting, but literally, don't
- 13:36Speaker 2: he like never mentioned any of it.
- 13:38Speaker 4: No, it sounded so real, like literally, I'm reading the
- 13:41Speaker 4: conversation verbati. That's crazy, Because I said, that's crazy. I'm
- 13:45Speaker 4: also in Nashville, so I'm like, I checked the time stamps.
- 13:48Speaker 4: He sent me the voice memo at five to twenty.
- 13:50Speaker 4: I didn't post that I was in Nashville until six thirty,
- 13:52Speaker 4: so I'm like, I don't think there's any way he
- 13:55Speaker 4: could have known I was in Nashville to like make
- 13:57Speaker 4: up a lie yeah.
- 13:58Speaker 2: I mean, it's like, because you said he said he
- 14:02Speaker 2: was in Nashville first, before you said yeah, he sent
- 14:04Speaker 2: me a voice memo, it would make it even worse
- 14:06Speaker 2: if if he knew, If he did know, I don't know,
- 14:07Speaker 2: And maybe he is a big.
- 14:08Speaker 4: Listener, that's what that's when I'm wondering him, like was
- 14:11Speaker 4: this some big like there's no way that it wasn't
- 14:13Speaker 4: some big like scheme.
- 14:15Speaker 1: Now that I think about it, Oh God.
- 14:18Speaker 3: That is so gross.
- 14:19Speaker 4: I know. But I also wasn't on the apps until Friday,
- 14:21Speaker 4: so I'm like, it's not like this was some kind
- 14:23Speaker 4: of premeditated thing. He could have just sent me a
- 14:25Speaker 4: DM on Instagram and be like, hey, fool you when
- 14:27Speaker 4: I saw you were in Nashville or whatever.
- 14:29Speaker 2: I wish there's answers like I really wish, because those
- 14:31Speaker 2: are those moments where you're like, what is your get?
- 14:33Speaker 3: What is your game here?
- 14:34Speaker 4: And I didn't play that much into it. He said
- 14:37Speaker 4: when he said what what flight are you want? I'm
- 14:39Speaker 4: not sure I'm in a good state to see you
- 14:40Speaker 4: on the plane. I said, I'm on the American Airlines
- 14:42Speaker 4: flight two PM.
- 14:42Speaker 1: And he said, for.
- 14:43Speaker 4: Fuck's sake, we got to have the first date on
- 14:45Speaker 4: the plane, I said, you're kidding, lol, just kind of
- 14:47Speaker 4: being like you're kidding, right, like hah, like this is funny.
- 14:50Speaker 4: And then he sent me a voice memo being like no,
- 14:51Speaker 4: I'm literally on that flight, like wouldn't that be funny
- 14:53Speaker 4: if we sat.
- 14:54Speaker 1: Next to each other? And I'm like, yeah, yeah, it
- 14:57Speaker 1: would be. It would be. It's actually the most magical
- 14:59Speaker 1: thing I've ever been apart.
- 15:00Speaker 3: Like why are you continuing to go down this role? Yeah?
- 15:02Speaker 1: I hate men from the UK. They're just constantly traumatizing me.
- 15:05Speaker 3: Honestly.
- 15:05Speaker 2: What's so crazy is like we've had multiple stories on
- 15:08Speaker 2: here about that, and I know you have more before
- 15:09Speaker 2: even this.
- 15:10Speaker 4: I don't I don't understand what the UK has against me,
- 15:12Speaker 4: Like this is the UK's plot trying to get back
- 15:14Speaker 4: at American women. They're like, you poured tea and our harbor,
- 15:17Speaker 4: and now we have to make sure that women experience
- 15:20Speaker 4: this humiliation ritual of constantly just I'm just looking for
- 15:25Speaker 4: someone to be nice to me, and like, just be
- 15:28Speaker 4: nice to me. I mean, obviously you want more than that,
- 15:30Speaker 4: but like it's so hard to just not be a dick.
- 15:33Speaker 4: It's one thing if you don't like me, you're not
- 15:34Speaker 4: attracting me, fine, but leave me alone.
- 15:36Speaker 1: Otherwise, correct, leave me alone. It is not that hard.
- 15:38Speaker 3: Don't be out of your way to be a dick,
- 15:40Speaker 3: Like that was out of your way to be a dick. Yeah.
- 15:42Speaker 4: So anyway, I don't know what the end game is.
- 15:44Speaker 4: I don't know if I'm going to say something to him.
- 15:46Speaker 4: I kind of want to post something online just being like,
- 15:48Speaker 4: what the fuck is wrong with this guy. I'm not
- 15:50Speaker 4: gonna put him on blast. I might post him in
- 15:52Speaker 4: one of those are we dating the same guy things?
- 15:55Speaker 2: I think you should, just because like at the end
- 15:57Speaker 2: of the day, like, sure, you need to have some accountability.
- 15:59Speaker 3: Yeah, this is ridiculous.
- 16:00Speaker 1: I'm just wondering if he's done this to other women.
- 16:03Speaker 3: Probably I can't imagine that you would be the first.
- 16:06Speaker 2: Yeah, and what I think I mean, to be honest,
- 16:08Speaker 2: my thought goes, I'm like, I feel so bad for
- 16:11Speaker 2: the person that he ends up being in a relationship with,
- 16:13Speaker 2: because if those are the head games that he's playing
- 16:14Speaker 2: with people just online, what are the head games that
- 16:16Speaker 2: he plays with somebody that he actually quote unquote.
- 16:20Speaker 3: Falls for that's beyond psychological.
- 16:23Speaker 4: Maybe that's what happens is like they're just dicks to
- 16:25Speaker 4: all the women they don't care about, and then when
- 16:26Speaker 4: they find someone they fall in love with, they're like, oh,
- 16:28Speaker 4: it'll be nice now.
- 16:29Speaker 2: I don't know because at a certain point, like I
- 16:31Speaker 2: can understand and very loosely understand, Like you if you're
- 16:34Speaker 2: twenty two or twenty one, you're in college and you're like,
- 16:37Speaker 2: you just haven't figured out that, you know, that's asshole behavior.
- 16:41Speaker 2: You're twenty nine, Like you should probably be well adjusted
- 16:43Speaker 2: into a job. You probably have women in your life
- 16:45Speaker 2: that are friends. You definitely have, you know, a family
- 16:47Speaker 2: member that's a woman. Yeah, why would you put somebody
- 16:50Speaker 2: through that?
- 16:50Speaker 4: Wouldn't you rather go on a date with, like a
- 16:52Speaker 4: normal girl that's also into you? Like, why do you
- 16:55Speaker 4: want to what do you want to kamikaze bomb yourself
- 16:59Speaker 4: in the middle a bingj I was like into you,
- 17:01Speaker 4: we were chatting, I was gonna go out with you,
- 17:05Speaker 4: We're having a great time, and then you just decided
- 17:07Speaker 4: to completely blow this shit up over like a random
- 17:09Speaker 4: lie that wasn't even fun. I mean it was fun
- 17:12Speaker 4: when it was real, but it's not that fun of
- 17:14Speaker 4: a lie.
- 17:14Speaker 2: Yeah, it's not something that you could come back on
- 17:16Speaker 2: and be like, aha, got it. Yeah, so it's not
- 17:18Speaker 2: funny at.
- 17:19Speaker 1: All anyway, now that the horse has been beat seven
- 17:21Speaker 1: several times over.
- 17:23Speaker 3: Well, beside that on the trip, does like okay? Because
- 17:26Speaker 3: I really do like I like.
- 17:27Speaker 2: The part that you said, you know, with your therapists
- 17:29Speaker 2: sending you on these trips because you did go to
- 17:30Speaker 2: five Sauce, that's cool down in Miami.
- 17:33Speaker 3: You did go to Nashville.
- 17:35Speaker 2: I do understand obviously, Like I was thinking about this,
- 17:38Speaker 2: that's been It's been a lot of moves for you
- 17:40Speaker 2: over the past eight months. Have you felt like these
- 17:43Speaker 2: trips have like helped, Like, is it like all right,
- 17:46Speaker 2: you got something to look forward to, changing things up,
- 17:49Speaker 2: re sparking with friends, like coming back to it when
- 17:51Speaker 2: you sit down with your therapist.
- 17:52Speaker 3: Is it like that actually helps?
- 17:55Speaker 4: Well, I mean, I just like seeing my friend. I
- 17:56Speaker 4: always feel like travel can be very healing. That's why
- 17:59Speaker 4: I put together my trips. I have the Tampa Bay
- 18:01Speaker 4: getaway coming up this weekend. So I'm always a proponent
- 18:04Speaker 4: of like putting yourself out there, making new friends, giving
- 18:07Speaker 4: yourself new experiences, like you never know what's on the
- 18:10Speaker 4: other side of saying yes, which is exactly how I
- 18:12Speaker 4: felt when I was in Nashville. I was like, oh
- 18:14Speaker 4: my god, Like I wasn't even going to come here
- 18:15Speaker 4: this weekend, and here I am on the same plane
- 18:17Speaker 4: as some dude of matched with unhinge. Granted it was
- 18:20Speaker 4: a lie, but you never know what kind of adventures
- 18:22Speaker 4: you're going to stumble into when you put yourself in
- 18:25Speaker 4: a new environment.
- 18:26Speaker 1: So I'm excited for the Tampa Bay.
- 18:28Speaker 4: Getaway this weekend, and then in a couple of weeks
- 18:30Speaker 4: I'm going to Italy, and then the weekend after that
- 18:32Speaker 4: and going to Austin. Like it.
- 18:34Speaker 3: I mean, it's a lot of to look forward to.
- 18:35Speaker 2: That's a lot of cool things going on your radar,
- 18:38Speaker 2: And I think for you, know, the part of it
- 18:40Speaker 2: that's I could kind of relate to as having uncomfortable
- 18:42Speaker 2: conversations with people or at least just getting your honest
- 18:45Speaker 2: truth out there, Like for you going on these trips
- 18:48Speaker 2: and acknowledging Okay, I need this, I'm going to give
- 18:50Speaker 2: it to me. There's things that I've and we talked
- 18:51Speaker 2: about this on the podcast weeks ago, of like I've
- 18:54Speaker 2: had these crazy dreams that have dealt with conflict and
- 18:57Speaker 2: people intruding my house and being flooded by water and
- 19:00Speaker 2: being killed, and I've had to connect it of like
- 19:02Speaker 2: it's also acknowledging a big part of that piece, like
- 19:04Speaker 2: protecting your piece, is having the conversations that you.
- 19:06Speaker 3: Know you need to have with friends.
- 19:08Speaker 2: And I casually mentioned it on the show today but
- 19:10Speaker 2: kind of jokingly, but like having a friend's wedding come
- 19:12Speaker 2: up in a couple months and then I have another
- 19:15Speaker 2: friend's wedding in January, and both of those friends, I'm
- 19:20Speaker 2: like facing the music right now that I don't think
- 19:23Speaker 2: I'm actually invited to those weddings. Oh no, because I
- 19:26Speaker 2: have the date at least. I literally have a saved
- 19:29Speaker 2: the date for one in November, and I saw it
- 19:31Speaker 2: and I was like, wait a second, that's kind of interesting.
- 19:33Speaker 2: I haven't talked to this friend in a long time.
- 19:35Speaker 2: I grew up with them, like we were super close.
- 19:37Speaker 2: So then obviously I moved and distance happens. They have
- 19:40Speaker 2: a family, they have other things in their life. So
- 19:42Speaker 2: I do have those friends where you like you talk
- 19:44Speaker 2: to once a year or once every couple of years.
- 19:47Speaker 2: But as I'm looking at it, I'm like, I feel uncomfortable,
- 19:49Speaker 2: but I need to make the call probably soon to
- 19:52Speaker 2: see if I'm actually invited or if the wedding's still long?
- 19:54Speaker 1: Do you have to travel for these weddings back.
- 19:56Speaker 2: Home back to bureau, So it's at least a day
- 19:59Speaker 2: that I'll be away from here. But as I'm looking
- 20:01Speaker 2: at the months coming up ahead, those are considerations of.
- 20:04Speaker 3: Like is that an open weekend? I feel like it
- 20:07Speaker 3: would be on the person. And this is where it
- 20:09Speaker 3: gets uncomfortable.
- 20:10Speaker 2: I feel like it would be on the person who's
- 20:11Speaker 2: actually hosting the event to let me know that I'm
- 20:14Speaker 2: not invited.
- 20:14Speaker 4: Well, I don't think they're gonna text you and be like, hey,
- 20:17Speaker 4: by the way, you're not coming to the wedding.
- 20:19Speaker 2: But even if I have a safe like, that's where
- 20:20Speaker 2: it gets weird because you're told to save the date.
- 20:22Speaker 3: I saved the date. Now what am I doing with
- 20:25Speaker 3: that date?
- 20:25Speaker 1: Yea, yeah, I don't know the date has been saved confirmed.
- 20:27Speaker 3: Yeah, Like I'm good.
- 20:28Speaker 2: Well am I just gonna wait up till the week
- 20:29Speaker 2: and just never get an invitation? And I also have
- 20:32Speaker 2: literally the same situation with another friend in January, where
- 20:34Speaker 2: it's we were told verbally that we would be invited,
- 20:41Speaker 2: never got to save the date.
- 20:43Speaker 3: We're now four months away from it.
- 20:44Speaker 2: Okay, having gotten an invitation, I don't think it's happening.
- 20:49Speaker 4: I'm trying to think of when my brother and his
- 20:51Speaker 4: fiance gave me the actual wedding invitations, and I it
- 20:55Speaker 4: was definitely when I lived in Tampa, so it would
- 20:57Speaker 4: have been somewhat close to the wedding, like it would have.
- 20:59Speaker 1: Been less than six months out, like maybe April. Yeah,
- 21:04Speaker 1: I would say April, So that was like what one
- 21:07Speaker 1: to three months.
- 21:08Speaker 4: Before the wedding was the actual invitation, the actual invitation,
- 21:12Speaker 4: So I got that in April, let's say, ninety days
- 21:14Speaker 4: before the wedding. So the November one is the only
- 21:16Speaker 4: one I'd be like concerned concerned about. But in January,
- 21:20Speaker 4: I would say, give it a little bit more time,
- 21:22Speaker 4: given until maybe October before you're kind of like, I'm
- 21:25Speaker 4: not sure if I'm going to this wedding. But yeah,
- 21:27Speaker 4: I wouldn't freak out right now, but it's definitely coming
- 21:31Speaker 4: down to the wire.
- 21:31Speaker 2: Yeah, because November looks like the one that I'm like,
- 21:33Speaker 2: all right, I'm gonna send a text this week. I'm
- 21:35Speaker 2: just going to shoot a text and just see where
- 21:36Speaker 2: we're at with it. Yeah, and just open the conversation
- 21:39Speaker 2: because I'm cool of being told like, hey, you know what,
- 21:41Speaker 2: we had to cut numbers down.
- 21:42Speaker 3: That's fine, and that's for.
- 21:43Speaker 1: Sure what they're going to tell you. They're gonna say, oh,
- 21:45Speaker 1: budgets blah blah blah blah blah.
- 21:46Speaker 2: Yeah, that makes sense. The January one, I'm like, I
- 21:49Speaker 2: haven't even gotten to save the date. I just have
- 21:51Speaker 2: verbal confirmation in my head of what date Tuesday.
- 21:53Speaker 1: When did they give you the verbal confirmation?
- 21:55Speaker 2: This was back in gosh, probably April? Oh no, no,
- 22:00Speaker 2: this was back in verbal confirmation was back in like January.
- 22:05Speaker 2: And then another conversation happened over the summer, probably in June,
- 22:10Speaker 2: and Jay, so.
- 22:11Speaker 4: I feel like maybe, especially if that person hasn't sent
- 22:13Speaker 4: you an actual save of the day and getting the
- 22:15Speaker 4: vibe they're not very organized, and so maybe it's one
- 22:18Speaker 4: of those things where, like two months before the wedding,
- 22:20Speaker 4: you're going to get the invitation, they'll be like, come if.
- 22:22Speaker 2: You can gosh yeah, And I think that might be
- 22:24Speaker 2: it because as we were like talking, they were mentioning
- 22:26Speaker 2: all the things that they're like realizing they have to do,
- 22:29Speaker 2: and so I felt like, oh wow, I didn't realize
- 22:31Speaker 2: all this went into a wedding, whereas you know, some
- 22:33Speaker 2: of us have gone to a couple and it's like, well, yeah,
- 22:36Speaker 2: we kind of got to know when it is, where
- 22:38Speaker 2: it's happening, and if we're actually invited, because there's a
- 22:41Speaker 2: lot that goes into it.
- 22:42Speaker 3: Yeah, I've got a couple.
- 22:42Speaker 2: Uncomfortable Texas in this week. But I like facing the conflict.
- 22:45Speaker 2: I guess, do you No, I'm very averse to conflict.
- 22:50Speaker 1: But well, on the bright side, you won't have to
- 22:52Speaker 1: go to weddings you don't want to go to.
- 22:53Speaker 2: I mean I want to go. I like celebrating them.
- 22:56Speaker 2: I just I would rather know if I'm invited or not.
- 22:58Speaker 2: That's kind of it.
- 22:59Speaker 4: Do you feel like something happen in your relationships to
- 23:01Speaker 4: where you wouldn't be invited, Like is there something lingering
- 23:05Speaker 4: where it's like, oh that happened, or like we've kind
- 23:07Speaker 4: of grown apart.
- 23:08Speaker 3: I think that's the girl apart part.
- 23:09Speaker 2: Like I think when I could look at friendships, I'm like, Okay,
- 23:12Speaker 2: I got to understand if we haven't talked in years
- 23:14Speaker 2: and we've just been broughten together over just a couple reunions,
- 23:18Speaker 2: understandable I don't need to be invited. But we were
- 23:22Speaker 2: also given purple kind of cues that we were invited,
- 23:25Speaker 2: So I'm like, huh, well are we?
- 23:27Speaker 4: Are we not?
- 23:27Speaker 2: Because either way, I would understand. I would love to
- 23:30Speaker 2: be there to support you, still love you as a person,
- 23:32Speaker 2: still love you as a friend. But I also understand
- 23:34Speaker 2: that this is a weird part of life, where like
- 23:36Speaker 2: just friendships literally close their chapter naturally, and when you
- 23:40Speaker 2: see each other there's no ill feelings toward each other.
- 23:43Speaker 2: You just don't hang around the same friend groups anymore.
- 23:45Speaker 2: You have outgrown each other or that part of that life.
- 23:48Speaker 2: I think that's both of these friendships. I think they're
- 23:50Speaker 2: going to always be a part of my life in
- 23:51Speaker 2: some capacity. But I just don't think if I were them,
- 23:56Speaker 2: I would understand we haven't talked in years, So why
- 23:58Speaker 2: am I inviting you to my wedding?
- 24:00Speaker 3: Understandable, That's a good point.
- 24:01Speaker 4: So I think maybe just send the text to the
- 24:03Speaker 4: person who's getting married in November, double check with them.
- 24:06Speaker 4: But I wouldn't freak out about the January one.
- 24:08Speaker 2: Just shit, okay, January, I hold off. I'm gonna hold
- 24:10Speaker 2: off till you said, like three months before, so I.
- 24:12Speaker 4: Would say maybe like late September, early October, just being like, hey,
- 24:15Speaker 4: is your wedding happening?
- 24:16Speaker 3: Yeah, like is this the date?
- 24:18Speaker 2: And that's why it's like I want to open up
- 24:19Speaker 2: the conversation so they don't feel awkward of like no worries.
- 24:22Speaker 3: But should I save the date? Yeah? Because if so,
- 24:24Speaker 3: then I got to tell work.
- 24:26Speaker 1: I got to give the heads up that, oh it's
- 24:27Speaker 1: like a Friday wedding.
- 24:29Speaker 3: I don't know. I think it's like I don't know,
- 24:32Speaker 3: I have no idea. So you didn't save the date.
- 24:35Speaker 1: It was not saved.
- 24:37Speaker 2: I was told the weekend, so I think it's a
- 24:39Speaker 2: Saturday wedding okay, but I think I would have to
- 24:41Speaker 2: travel for it. So it's one of those of like
- 24:43Speaker 2: come in when you can. But I would like to
- 24:45Speaker 2: just know instead of being the awkward one out. That's like,
- 24:48Speaker 2: fully get that. That's all I got. I just have
- 24:50Speaker 2: awkward friendships going on right now.
- 24:52Speaker 1: Oh I'm sorry, I'm I hope they resolved themselves.
- 24:55Speaker 3: I hope so too. I hope that so hinge is
- 24:58Speaker 3: no longer a thing on your phone.
- 24:59Speaker 1: Hinge.
- 25:00Speaker 4: Well, I'm keeping it on my phone because I do
- 25:02Speaker 4: want to see if he's going to say something.
- 25:04Speaker 3: I don't think he is.
- 25:05Speaker 4: But I'm going back and forth between whether or not
- 25:08Speaker 4: I want to either not confront him because I think
- 25:12Speaker 4: he's just gonna feed me a bunch of eyes, Like
- 25:14Speaker 4: what do I want from him at this point? Because
- 25:16Speaker 4: I don't want to date somebody who's like an actual
- 25:18Speaker 4: psychopath and like messes with women. Nope, because it's like
- 25:21Speaker 4: that's just like psycho behavior, yes actually is yes, actually
- 25:25Speaker 4: weird behavior. And then I also kind of want to
- 25:27Speaker 4: post on one of those Facebook pages and just be like,
- 25:30Speaker 4: has anybody else experienced like that?
- 25:31Speaker 1: That's just like a weird.
- 25:34Speaker 4: It's so far beyond weird, because now I feel like,
- 25:38Speaker 4: did he know I was in Nashville?
- 25:40Speaker 1: Is that why he said it? Because he kind of
- 25:41Speaker 1: like went out of his way to like say it
- 25:44Speaker 1: on hinge.
- 25:46Speaker 4: So I just don't It's just a very weird, weird
- 25:50Speaker 4: experience to me, and I would love to know what's
- 25:51Speaker 4: going on on.
- 25:52Speaker 1: The other side.
- 25:52Speaker 3: I honestly feel like and I don't.
- 25:54Speaker 2: Yeah, like you said, I don't think you're gonna get
- 25:55Speaker 2: any answers, but I would be very curious on if
- 25:59Speaker 2: you just kind of let off a little bit like
- 26:01Speaker 2: you just popped off, just like.
- 26:03Speaker 3: Like what, what was your game here?
- 26:04Speaker 4: No, because I think that's what I think they get
- 26:06Speaker 4: off on that, Like I think they love knowing they've
- 26:07Speaker 4: affected you. And I'm not even that bothered by it's
- 26:11Speaker 4: just more of like the principle. I'm really bothered by
- 26:14Speaker 4: the fact that, like somebody just decided to just like
- 26:16Speaker 4: fuck with me. I'm like, that's so random, Like.
- 26:19Speaker 1: It's just weird.
- 26:20Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't like it. I mean, it's just it's
- 26:23Speaker 3: so gross behavior.
- 26:24Speaker 2: And what's I think more upsetting is that it's like
- 26:26Speaker 2: happening so much like it was a joke of like
- 26:29Speaker 2: Tampa dating is so bad, but damn yeah, it's everywhere.
- 26:33Speaker 4: Dating's not bad. I think the men are just awful.
- 26:35Speaker 4: They're just bad people. You could just date with me, well,
- 26:38Speaker 4: good luck.
- 26:39Speaker 2: If you do get any answers, or if you do
- 26:40Speaker 2: put it let us know, thank you, Thank you very
- 26:42Speaker 2: curious on that. If you do ever listen to the
- 26:44Speaker 2: podcast and you're like, wait a second, I want to
- 26:45Speaker 2: jump into this conversation. Hop in the comments you could
- 26:47Speaker 2: comment on I know Spotify has the comments that way
- 26:50Speaker 2: every now and then we read also leaving the ratings
- 26:52Speaker 2: goes a long way, so you can continue to bring
- 26:54Speaker 2: you more And if this is your first time listening
- 26:56Speaker 2: in a while, catch up on the previous answers.
- 26:58Speaker 3: Because speaking of dating, if you.
- 27:00Speaker 2: Have not yet listened to the episode with Jake and
- 27:03Speaker 2: Jake came into Florida, it's almost just as bad. Poor
- 27:06Speaker 2: Jake flew into Tampa was expecting to meet somebody that's.
- 27:09Speaker 1: Also evil behavior. So it's not even just the men.
- 27:11Speaker 1: The women here are able to do.
- 27:13Speaker 2: People just want to be single for life of have
- 27:14Speaker 2: really sinister energy happening. Some episodes to catch up on there,
- 27:18Speaker 2: we'll be back tomorrow