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Should Couples Combine Finances? What Are the Pros, Cons, and Biblical View? · Becoming Financially Confident

• 0:37
  One
• 0:38
  account
• 0:38
  or
• 0:38
  two?
• 0:39
  Now,
• 0:39
  that
• 0:39
  question
• 0:40
  sounds
• 0:40
  simple,
• 0:41
  but
• 0:41
  for
• 0:41
  a
• 0:42
  lot
• 0:42
  of
• 0:42
  couples,
• 0:43
  it's
• 0:43
  not
• 0:43
  so
• 0:44
  simple.
• 0:45
  Because
• 0:45
  money
• 0:45
  isn't
• 0:46
  just
• 0:46
  a
• 0:46
  math
• 0:47
  equation.
• 0:47
  It's
• 0:48
  about
• 0:48
  trust.
• 0:49
  It's
• 0:49
  about
• 0:49
  control.
• 0:50
  It's
• 0:51
  about
• 0:51
  history.
• 0:52
  And
• 0:52
  hey,
• 0:52
  for
• 0:52
  a
• 0:52
  lot
• 0:53
  of
• 0:53
  couples,
• 0:53
  it's
• 0:54
  about
• 0:54
  fear.
• 0:55
  And
• 0:56
  before
• 0:56
  you
• 0:56
  even
• 0:56
  realize
• 0:57
  it,
• 0:57
  a
• 0:58
  question
• 0:58
  about
• 0:58
  bank
• 0:59
  accounts
• 0:59
  turns
• 1:00
  into
• 1:00
  distance.
• 1:01
  Friend,
• 1:02
  if
• 1:02
  this
• 1:02
  topic
• 1:02
  feels
• 1:03
  loaded
• 1:03
  in
• 1:03
  your
• 1:04
  relationship,
• 1:04
  well,
• 1:05
  let
• 1:05
  me
• 1:05
  tell
• 1:05
  you
• 1:05
  right
• 1:05
  now,
• 1:05
  this
• 1:06
  episode
• 1:06
  is
• 1:06
  for
• 1:06
  you.
• 1:07
  You're
• 1:07
  not
• 1:08
  wrong
• 1:08
  in
• 1:08
  feeling
• 1:08
  cautious,
• 1:09
  and
• 1:10
  you're
• 1:10
  not
• 1:10
  failing.
• 1:11
  You're
• 1:11
  trying
• 1:11
  to
• 1:11
  protect
• 1:12
  something
• 1:12
  that
• 1:12
  matters.
• 1:14
  So
• 1:14
  let's
• 1:14
  talk
• 1:14
  about
• 1:14
  what
• 1:15
  really
• 1:15
  matters
• 1:16
  first,
• 1:17
  here's
• 1:17
  the
• 1:17
  question
• 1:18
  we're
• 1:18
  answering
• 1:18
  today.
• 1:19
  Should
• 1:19
  couples
• 1:20
  combine
• 1:20
  finances?
• 1:21
  And
• 1:21
  here's
• 1:21
  my
• 1:22
  promise
• 1:22
  for
• 1:22
  you.
• 1:22
  By
• 1:22
  the
• 1:22
  end
• 1:23
  of
• 1:23
  the
• 1:23
  episode,
• 1:23
  you're
• 1:24
  going
• 1:24
  to
• 1:24
  know
• 1:24
  what
• 1:24
  matters
• 1:25
  more
• 1:25
  than
• 1:25
  one
• 1:26
  or
• 1:26
  two
• 1:26
  accounts.
• 1:27
  I'm
• 1:27
  going
• 1:27
  to
• 1:27
  tell
• 1:27
  you
• 1:27
  about
• 1:27
  the
• 1:28
  real
• 1:28
  pros
• 1:28
  and
• 1:28
  cons.
• 1:29
  And
• 1:30
  basically,
• 1:30
  bigger
• 1:30
  than
• 1:31
  all
• 1:31
  those
• 1:31
  things,
• 1:31
  I'm
• 1:32
  going
• 1:32
  to
• 1:32
  tell
• 1:32
  you
• 1:32
  how
• 1:32
  to
• 1:32
  move
• 1:33
  forward
• 1:33
  with
• 1:33
  unity
• 1:34
  instead
• 1:34
  of
• 1:35
  pressure.
• 1:35
  Today's
• 1:36
  not
• 1:36
  about
• 1:36
  rules.
• 1:37
  It's
• 1:37
  not
• 1:38
  about
• 1:38
  guilt.
• 1:38
  It's
• 1:39
  just
• 1:39
  about
• 1:39
  wisdom
• 1:40
  and
• 1:40
  peace.
• 2:03
  Hey,
• 2:03
  friend.
• 2:04
  Ralph
• 2:04
  Estep
• 2:04
  Jr.
• 2:05
  Here.
• 2:05
  Welcome
• 2:06
  to
• 2:06
  Financially
• 2:06
  Confident
• 2:07
  Christian,
• 2:07
  where
• 2:08
  we're
• 2:08
  learning
• 2:08
  how
• 2:08
  to
• 2:08
  walk
• 2:08
  through
• 2:09
  life
• 2:09
  and
• 2:09
  money
• 2:10
  with
• 2:10
  wisdom,
• 2:11
  with
• 2:11
  peace,
• 2:12
  and
• 2:12
  with
• 2:12
  a
• 2:12
  heart
• 2:13
  anchored
• 2:13
  in
• 2:13
  God's
• 2:13
  truth.
• 2:14
  My
• 2:15
  mission
• 2:15
  every
• 2:15
  day
• 2:16
  is
• 2:16
  to
• 2:16
  help
• 2:16
  you
• 2:16
  break
• 2:17
  the
• 2:17
  cycle
• 2:17
  of
• 2:17
  financial
• 2:18
  shame
• 2:18
  and
• 2:18
  build
• 2:19
  those
• 2:19
  steady
• 2:19
  habits
• 2:20
  deeply
• 2:20
  rooted
• 2:21
  in
• 2:21
  faith,
• 2:22
  and
• 2:22
  really
• 2:22
  become
• 2:23
  a
• 2:23
  financially
• 2:24
  confident
• 2:24
  Christian.
• 2:25
  And
• 2:25
  I'm
• 2:25
  so
• 2:26
  glad
• 2:26
  you're
• 2:26
  here
• 2:26
  today.
• 2:27
  Now,
• 2:27
  yesterday
• 2:28
  we
• 2:28
  talked
• 2:28
  about
• 2:29
  the
• 2:29
  connection
• 2:30
  between
• 2:30
  teamwork
• 2:31
  and
• 2:31
  debt.
• 2:32
  We
• 2:32
  didn't
• 2:32
  talk
• 2:32
  about
• 2:32
  blame.
• 2:33
  And
• 2:33
  we
• 2:33
  talked
• 2:34
  about
• 2:34
  how
• 2:34
  once
• 2:34
  couples
• 2:35
  start
• 2:35
  working
• 2:35
  as
• 2:36
  a
• 2:36
  team,
• 2:36
  this
• 2:37
  question
• 2:37
  comes
• 2:37
  next.
• 2:38
  And
• 2:38
  that's
• 2:38
  what
• 2:38
  we're
• 2:38
  going
• 2:38
  to
• 2:38
  talk
• 2:38
  about
• 2:39
  today.
• 2:39
  Because
• 2:40
  this
• 2:40
  feels
• 2:41
  more
• 2:41
  emotional
• 2:42
  than
• 2:42
  debt
• 2:42
  for
• 2:43
  some
• 2:43
  couples.
• 2:43
  And
• 2:43
  that
• 2:43
  says,
• 2:44
  what
• 2:44
  do
• 2:44
  we
• 2:44
  do
• 2:45
  about
• 2:45
  sharing
• 2:45
  our
• 2:45
  information?
• 2:47
  Because
• 2:47
  today
• 2:47
  isn't
• 2:47
  about
• 2:48
  pressure.
• 2:48
  It's
• 2:49
  just
• 2:49
  gentleness.
• 2:50
  And
• 2:50
  listen,
• 2:50
  before
• 2:50
  I
• 2:50
  get
• 2:51
  too
• 2:51
  deep,
• 2:51
  there's
• 2:52
  no
• 2:52
  one
• 2:52
  size
• 2:52
  fits
• 2:53
  all
• 2:53
  approach
• 2:53
  to
• 2:54
  this.
• 2:54
  So
• 2:55
  let's
• 2:55
  approach
• 2:55
  it
• 2:55
  gently.
• 2:56
  And
• 2:56
  here's
• 2:57
  a
• 2:57
  question
• 2:57
  that
• 2:57
  I
• 2:57
  hear
• 2:58
  all
• 2:58
  the
• 2:58
  time,
• 2:59
  Ralph,
• 2:59
  should
• 3:00
  we
• 3:00
  combine
• 3:00
  our
• 3:00
  finances
• 3:01
  or
• 3:01
  is
• 3:02
  it
• 3:02
  okay
• 3:02
  that
• 3:02
  we
• 3:03
  haven't?
• 3:04
  Let
• 3:04
  me
• 3:04
  tell
• 3:04
  you
• 3:04
  right
• 3:04
  now,
• 3:05
  I
• 3:05
  hear
• 3:05
  that
• 3:05
  question
• 3:05
  probably
• 3:06
  ten
• 3:06
  times
• 3:06
  a
• 3:07
  week.
• 3:07
  And
• 3:08
  that
• 3:08
  question
• 3:08
  matters,
• 3:09
  doesn't
• 3:09
  it?
• 3:10
  Because
• 3:10
  the
• 3:10
  money
• 3:11
  structure
• 3:11
  can
• 3:11
  either
• 3:11
  strengthen
• 3:12
  your
• 3:12
  unity
• 3:13
  or
• 3:13
  it
• 3:13
  can
• 3:13
  really
• 3:14
  strain
• 3:14
  it
• 3:14
  quickly.
• 3:15
  And
• 3:15
  if
• 3:16
  the
• 3:16
  idea
• 3:16
  of
• 3:16
  combining
• 3:17
  finances
• 3:17
  makes
• 3:17
  you
• 3:18
  anxious,
• 3:19
  you're
• 3:19
  not
• 3:19
  selfish.
• 3:20
  You're
• 3:21
  just
• 3:21
  being
• 3:21
  human.
• 3:22
  Because
• 3:22
  in
• 3:22
  a
• 3:22
  lot
• 3:23
  of
• 3:23
  ways,
• 3:23
  independence
• 3:24
  can
• 3:24
  feel
• 3:24
  like
• 3:24
  safety.
• 3:25
  Like,
• 3:25
  if
• 3:25
  I
• 3:25
  have
• 3:25
  my
• 3:25
  own
• 3:26
  independence,
• 3:26
  Ralph,
• 3:26
  I
• 3:27
  don't
• 3:27
  have
• 3:27
  to
• 3:27
  be
• 3:27
  dependent
• 3:28
  on
• 3:28
  somebody.
• 3:29
  And
• 3:29
  maybe
• 3:29
  you've
• 3:29
  had
• 3:30
  those
• 3:30
  past
• 3:30
  relationship
• 3:31
  where
• 3:32
  you
• 3:32
  had
• 3:32
  those
• 3:32
  hurt
• 3:32
  situations.
• 3:34
  Maybe
• 3:34
  you
• 3:34
  were
• 3:34
  with
• 3:34
  somebody
• 3:35
  that
• 3:35
  didn't
• 3:35
  take
• 3:35
  care
• 3:36
  of
• 3:36
  their
• 3:36
  finances
• 3:36
  in
• 3:37
  bad
• 3:37
  money
• 3:37
  seasons,
• 3:38
  or
• 3:38
  you
• 3:39
  found
• 3:39
  out
• 3:39
  they
• 3:39
  had
• 3:39
  a
• 3:39
  debt
• 3:40
  you
• 3:40
  weren't
• 3:40
  aware
• 3:40
  of.
• 3:41
  And
• 3:41
  for
• 3:42
  so
• 3:42
  many
• 3:42
  people
• 3:42
  in
• 3:42
  a
• 3:43
  relationship,
• 3:43
  it
• 3:44
  really
• 3:44
  comes
• 3:44
  down
• 3:44
  to
• 3:45
  control
• 3:45
  issues.
• 3:46
  So
• 3:46
  today
• 3:47
  isn't
• 3:47
  a
• 3:47
  character
• 3:48
  problem
• 3:48
  today.
• 3:48
  It's
• 3:49
  really
• 3:49
  a
• 3:49
  signal
• 3:49
  of
• 3:50
  trust
• 3:50
  in
• 3:50
  the
• 3:50
  relationship.
• 3:51
  And
• 3:52
  trust
• 3:52
  deserves
• 3:53
  care.
• 3:54
  And
• 3:54
  your
• 3:54
  hesitation
• 3:55
  isn't
• 3:55
  a
• 3:55
  character
• 3:56
  flaw.
• 3:56
  It's
• 3:57
  a
• 3:57
  signal
• 3:57
  that
• 3:58
  trust
• 3:58
  deserves
• 3:58
  that
• 3:59
  care.
• 4:00
  Let
• 4:00
  me
• 4:00
  start
• 4:00
  by
• 4:00
  saying
• 4:01
  this.
• 4:01
  There
• 4:01
  is
• 4:01
  no
• 4:02
  biblical
• 4:02
  command
• 4:03
  that
• 4:03
  says
• 4:03
  couples
• 4:03
  must
• 4:04
  share
• 4:04
  one
• 4:04
  bank
• 4:04
  account.
• 4:05
  There
• 4:05
  just
• 4:05
  isn't.
• 4:06
  But
• 4:06
  what
• 4:06
  there
• 4:06
  is
• 4:07
  is
• 4:07
  a
• 4:07
  biblical
• 4:08
  call
• 4:08
  to
• 4:08
  unity.
• 4:08
  And
• 4:09
  that's
• 4:09
  what
• 4:09
  I'm
• 4:09
  really
• 4:09
  going
• 4:09
  to
• 4:09
  lean
• 4:09
  into
• 4:10
  today.
• 4:10
  The
• 4:11
  danger
• 4:11
  isn't
• 4:12
  separate
• 4:12
  accounts.
• 4:13
  The
• 4:13
  danger,
• 4:14
  in
• 4:14
  my
• 4:14
  view,
• 4:14
  is
• 4:15
  separate
• 4:15
  visions.
• 4:17
  And
• 4:17
  that's
• 4:17
  where
• 4:17
  couples
• 4:17
  get
• 4:18
  stuck
• 4:18
  all
• 4:18
  the
• 4:18
  time.
• 4:19
  And
• 4:19
  I've
• 4:20
  walked
• 4:20
  with
• 4:20
  many
• 4:20
  couples
• 4:21
  through
• 4:21
  this
• 4:21
  exact
• 4:22
  process.
• 4:22
  I'll
• 4:22
  never
• 4:23
  forget.
• 4:23
  I
• 4:23
  work
• 4:23
  with
• 4:23
  a
• 4:24
  newly
• 4:24
  married
• 4:24
  couple.
• 4:25
  I've
• 4:25
  worked
• 4:25
  with
• 4:26
  longtime
• 4:26
  spouses.
• 4:27
  I've
• 4:27
  looked
• 4:27
  with
• 4:27
  second
• 4:28
  marriages,
• 4:29
  and
• 4:29
  I've
• 4:29
  seen
• 4:30
  completely
• 4:30
  different
• 4:31
  situations.
• 4:31
  Some
• 4:32
  combine
• 4:32
  everything.
• 4:33
  Some
• 4:33
  do
• 4:33
  a
• 4:34
  hybrid,
• 4:34
  and
• 4:35
  some.
• 4:35
  Listen,
• 4:35
  let
• 4:35
  me
• 4:35
  tell
• 4:35
  you
• 4:35
  right
• 4:36
  now,
• 4:36
  some
• 4:36
  separate
• 4:36
  marriages,
• 4:37
  man,
• 4:37
  they
• 4:37
  keep
• 4:37
  everything
• 4:38
  separate.
• 4:39
  But
• 4:39
  here's
• 4:39
  the
• 4:40
  thing
• 4:40
  I'm
• 4:40
  going
• 4:40
  to
• 4:40
  tell
• 4:40
  you.
• 4:40
  The
• 4:41
  healthiest
• 4:41
  couples
• 4:42
  share
• 4:42
  two
• 4:42
  things,
• 4:43
  and
• 4:43
  these
• 4:43
  are
• 4:43
  the
• 4:44
  things
• 4:44
  that
• 4:44
  are
• 4:44
  critical.
• 4:45
  They
• 4:45
  share
• 4:45
  communication
• 4:46
  and
• 4:47
  they
• 4:47
  share
• 4:47
  a
• 4:48
  shared
• 4:48
  direction.
• 4:49
  See,
• 4:49
  the
• 4:49
  healthiest
• 4:50
  couples
• 4:50
  aren't
• 4:50
  defined
• 4:51
  by
• 4:51
  structure.
• 4:52
  They're
• 4:52
  defined
• 4:53
  by
• 4:53
  communication
• 4:54
  and
• 4:54
  that
• 4:55
  shared
• 4:55
  direction.
• 4:56
  So
• 4:56
  let
• 4:56
  me
• 4:56
  give
• 4:57
  you
• 4:57
  two
• 4:57
  quick
• 4:57
  examples.
• 4:58
  Here's
• 4:58
  example
• 4:59
  one.
• 4:59
  There's
• 5:00
  some
• 5:00
  times
• 5:00
  where
• 5:00
  you
• 5:00
  have
• 5:01
  one
• 5:01
  account
• 5:01
  and
• 5:02
  no
• 5:02
  conversations.
• 5:03
  If
• 5:04
  you're
• 5:04
  in
• 5:04
  that
• 5:04
  kind
• 5:04
  of
• 5:04
  relationship,
• 5:05
  it's
• 5:06
  leading
• 5:06
  to
• 5:06
  suspicion.
• 5:07
  And
• 5:07
  purchases
• 5:08
  feel
• 5:08
  personal
• 5:08
  because
• 5:09
  you're
• 5:09
  not
• 5:09
  talking
• 5:09
  about.
• 5:09
  There's
• 5:10
  no
• 5:10
  conversation
• 5:11
  going
• 5:11
  on.
• 5:12
  Now,
• 5:12
  sometimes
• 5:13
  you
• 5:13
  can
• 5:13
  have
• 5:13
  separate
• 5:14
  accounts,
• 5:14
  but
• 5:15
  you
• 5:15
  plan
• 5:15
  that
• 5:15
  together,
• 5:16
  and
• 5:16
  it
• 5:17
  leads
• 5:17
  to
• 5:17
  peace,
• 5:17
  it
• 5:18
  leads
• 5:18
  to
• 5:18
  unity.
• 5:19
  And
• 5:20
  in
• 5:20
  the
• 5:20
  end,
• 5:20
  it
• 5:20
  wasn't
• 5:21
  the
• 5:21
  system,
• 5:22
  it
• 5:22
  was
• 5:23
  unity.
• 5:24
  So
• 5:24
  here's
• 5:24
  today's
• 5:25
  central
• 5:25
  question,
• 5:26
  and
• 5:26
  this
• 5:26
  is
• 5:26
  one
• 5:26
  we're
• 5:27
  really
• 5:27
  going
• 5:27
  to
• 5:27
  lean
• 5:27
  into.
• 5:28
  Do
• 5:28
  your
• 5:29
  finances
• 5:29
  reflect
• 5:30
  one
• 5:30
  team
• 5:30
  or
• 5:31
  just
• 5:31
  two
• 5:31
  individuals
• 5:32
  sharing
• 5:32
  expenses?
• 5:33
  Kind
• 5:33
  of
• 5:33
  like
• 5:33
  roommates,
• 5:34
  right?
• 5:35
  Because
• 5:35
  money
• 5:35
  doesn't
• 5:36
  just
• 5:36
  fund
• 5:36
  life,
• 5:37
  it
• 5:38
  reveals
• 5:38
  your
• 5:38
  alignment.
• 5:39
  So
• 5:40
  today
• 5:40
  I
• 5:40
  want
• 5:40
  to
• 5:40
  give
• 5:40
  you
• 5:40
  an
• 5:41
  alignment,
• 5:41
  a
• 5:41
  clear
• 5:42
  framework
• 5:42
  to
• 5:42
  really
• 5:43
  help
• 5:43
  you.
• 5:43
  I'm
• 5:43
  going
• 5:43
  to
• 5:43
  talk
• 5:44
  about
• 5:44
  unity.
• 5:44
  I'm
• 5:45
  going
• 5:45
  to
• 5:45
  talk
• 5:45
  about
• 5:45
  transparency.
• 5:46
  I'm
• 5:46
  going
• 5:47
  to
• 5:47
  talk
• 5:47
  about
• 5:47
  agreement.
• 5:48
  And
• 5:48
  finally,
• 5:49
  peace.
• 5:49
  And
• 5:50
  this
• 5:50
  isn't
• 5:50
  about
• 5:50
  picking
• 5:50
  the
• 5:51
  right
• 5:51
  system.
• 5:52
  It's
• 5:52
  about
• 5:52
  building
• 5:53
  the
• 5:53
  right
• 5:53
  foundation
• 5:54
  from
• 5:54
  the
• 5:54
  start.
• 5:55
  Because
• 5:55
  Unity
• 5:56
  comes
• 5:56
  first.
• 5:57
  Before
• 5:57
  you
• 5:57
  have
• 5:58
  separate
• 5:58
  accounts
• 5:58
  and
• 5:59
  spreadsheets
• 5:59
  and
• 5:59
  make
• 6:00
  rules
• 6:00
  for
• 6:00
  each
• 6:00
  other,
• 6:01
  you
• 6:01
  got
• 6:01
  to
• 6:02
  be
• 6:02
  on
• 6:02
  the
• 6:02
  same
• 6:02
  team.
• 6:03
  If
• 6:04
  you're
• 6:04
  still
• 6:04
  in
• 6:04
  that
• 6:05
  mindset
• 6:05
  of
• 6:05
  mine
• 6:06
  versus
• 6:06
  yours,
• 6:07
  it's
• 6:08
  never
• 6:08
  going
• 6:08
  to
• 6:08
  work
• 6:08
  out.
• 6:09
  Even
• 6:09
  if
• 6:09
  you
• 6:09
  have
• 6:10
  separate
• 6:10
  accounts,
• 6:10
  you've
• 6:11
  got
• 6:11
  to
• 6:11
  start
• 6:11
  thinking
• 6:12
  in
• 6:12
  terms
• 6:12
  of
• 6:12
  hours.
• 6:13
  Now,
• 6:14
  Unity
• 6:14
  doesn't
• 6:14
  mean
• 6:15
  you
• 6:15
  think
• 6:15
  the
• 6:15
  same.
• 6:15
  You
• 6:15
  don't
• 6:16
  have
• 6:16
  to
• 6:16
  be
• 6:16
  robots,
• 6:17
  you
• 6:17
  don't
• 6:17
  have
• 6:17
  to
• 6:17
  be
• 6:17
  cut
• 6:18
  from
• 6:18
  the
• 6:18
  same
• 6:18
  cloth.
• 6:19
  But
• 6:19
  it
• 6:19
  does
• 6:20
  mean
• 6:20
  you're
• 6:20
  moving
• 6:21
  in
• 6:21
  the
• 6:21
  same
• 6:21
  direction.
• 6:22
  See,
• 6:23
  Unity
• 6:23
  says
• 6:24
  we're
• 6:24
  on
• 6:24
  the
• 6:24
  same
• 6:25
  side.
• 6:26
  Let's
• 6:26
  move
• 6:26
  to
• 6:26
  transparency,
• 6:27
  because
• 6:27
  transparency
• 6:28
  is
• 6:28
  important
• 6:28
  as
• 6:28
  well.
• 6:29
  If
• 6:29
  you
• 6:29
  live
• 6:30
  in
• 6:30
  a
• 6:30
  relationship
• 6:31
  where
• 6:31
  there's
• 6:31
  secrets,
• 6:32
  that
• 6:32
  just
• 6:33
  leads
• 6:33
  to
• 6:33
  suspicion
• 6:34
  and
• 6:34
  you're
• 6:34
  wondering,
• 6:35
  what's
• 6:35
  this
• 6:35
  person
• 6:35
  doing?
• 6:35
  And
• 6:36
  maybe
• 6:36
  you've
• 6:36
  been
• 6:36
  hurt
• 6:36
  before
• 6:37
  you
• 6:37
  were
• 6:37
  in
• 6:37
  a
• 6:38
  relationship
• 6:38
  or
• 6:38
  those
• 6:39
  secrets,
• 6:39
  it
• 6:40
  led
• 6:40
  to
• 6:40
  something
• 6:40
  else.
• 6:41
  But
• 6:41
  when
• 6:41
  you
• 6:42
  have
• 6:42
  clarity,
• 6:43
  a
• 6:43
  lot
• 6:43
  of
• 6:43
  times
• 6:44
  it
• 6:44
  leads
• 6:44
  to
• 6:44
  safety.
• 6:45
  And
• 6:45
  they
• 6:45
  see.
• 6:46
  Now
• 6:46
  a
• 6:46
  lot
• 6:46
  of
• 6:46
  people
• 6:46
  say,
• 6:47
  well,
• 6:47
  Ralph,
• 6:47
  this
• 6:47
  is
• 6:47
  about,
• 6:48
  I
• 6:48
  don't
• 6:48
  want
• 6:48
  to
• 6:48
  have
• 6:48
  to
• 6:48
  give
• 6:48
  permission
• 6:49
  to
• 6:49
  my
• 6:49
  spouse.
• 6:50
  That's
• 6:50
  not
• 6:50
  what
• 6:50
  I'm
• 6:50
  saying
• 6:51
  here.
• 6:51
  This
• 6:51
  is
• 6:52
  about
• 6:52
  awareness.
• 6:54
  Awareness
• 6:54
  can
• 6:54
  be
• 6:55
  simply
• 6:55
  something
• 6:55
  that
• 6:56
  you
• 6:56
  know
• 6:56
  what's
• 6:56
  coming
• 6:56
  in,
• 6:57
  you
• 6:57
  know
• 6:57
  what's
• 6:57
  going
• 6:58
  out,
• 6:58
  and
• 6:58
  you
• 6:58
  know
• 6:59
  what
• 6:59
  you're
• 6:59
  building
• 6:59
  towards.
• 7:00
  You
• 7:00
  don't
• 7:00
  have
• 7:00
  to
• 7:00
  have
• 7:00
  completely
• 7:01
  combined
• 7:02
  finances
• 7:02
  to
• 7:03
  do
• 7:03
  that.
• 7:03
  But
• 7:04
  shared
• 7:04
  awareness
• 7:05
  matters
• 7:05
  more
• 7:06
  than
• 7:06
  shared
• 7:06
  accounts.
• 7:07
  In
• 7:07
  the
• 7:07
  end,
• 7:08
  it's
• 7:08
  what's
• 7:09
  really
• 7:09
  going
• 7:09
  to
• 7:09
  make
• 7:09
  it
• 7:09
  work.
• 7:09
  Let's
• 7:10
  move
• 7:10
  to
• 7:10
  agreement,
• 7:10
  because
• 7:11
  we've
• 7:11
  got
• 7:11
  to
• 7:11
  have
• 7:11
  agreement
• 7:12
  here.
• 7:12
  Agreement
• 7:13
  matters
• 7:13
  more
• 7:13
  than
• 7:13
  the
• 7:14
  method.
• 7:14
  Listen,
• 7:14
  you
• 7:15
  can
• 7:15
  have
• 7:15
  five
• 7:15
  different
• 7:16
  accounts,
• 7:16
  but
• 7:17
  if
• 7:17
  you're
• 7:17
  on
• 7:17
  the
• 7:17
  same
• 7:18
  page,
• 7:19
  you
• 7:20
  can
• 7:20
  do
• 7:20
  that.
• 7:20
  If
• 7:20
  you
• 7:21
  have
• 7:21
  agreement.
• 7:21
  There's
• 7:22
  no
• 7:22
  holy
• 7:22
  setup
• 7:23
  here.
• 7:23
  I
• 7:23
  start
• 7:23
  off
• 7:23
  by
• 7:23
  talking
• 7:24
  about
• 7:24
  what
• 7:24
  does
• 7:24
  the
• 7:24
  Bible
• 7:25
  say
• 7:25
  about
• 7:25
  it?
• 7:25
  The
• 7:25
  Bible's
• 7:26
  kind
• 7:26
  of
• 7:26
  silent
• 7:26
  about
• 7:27
  this.
• 7:27
  But
• 7:28
  if
• 7:28
  you
• 7:28
  have
• 7:28
  an
• 7:28
  agreement,
• 7:29
  it
• 7:29
  builds
• 7:29
  that
• 7:30
  buy
• 7:30
  in
• 7:30
  and
• 7:31
  that
• 7:31
  builds
• 7:31
  in
• 7:32
  consistency.
• 7:33
  And
• 7:33
  here's
• 7:34
  the
• 7:34
  problem.
• 7:34
  If
• 7:34
  you've
• 7:34
  got
• 7:34
  one
• 7:35
  person
• 7:35
  that
• 7:35
  caves
• 7:35
  under
• 7:36
  pressure,
• 7:36
  the
• 7:37
  tension
• 7:37
  shows
• 7:37
  up.
• 7:38
  And
• 7:39
  that's
• 7:39
  what
• 7:39
  I'm
• 7:39
  saying.
• 7:39
  If
• 7:39
  there's
• 7:39
  no
• 7:39
  agreement,
• 7:40
  it's
• 7:41
  going
• 7:41
  to
• 7:41
  be
• 7:41
  a
• 7:41
  problem,
• 7:42
  it's
• 7:42
  going
• 7:42
  to
• 7:42
  be
• 7:42
  strained.
• 7:43
  But
• 7:44
  agreement
• 7:44
  should
• 7:44
  be
• 7:44
  mutual
• 7:45
  and
• 7:46
  never
• 7:46
  forced.
• 7:47
  And
• 7:48
  finally,
• 7:48
  anchor,
• 7:49
  because
• 7:49
  peace
• 7:50
  is
• 7:50
  the
• 7:50
  goal.
• 7:50
  That's
• 7:50
  what
• 7:50
  we
• 7:50
  got
• 7:50
  to
• 7:51
  get
• 7:51
  to,
• 7:51
  peace.
• 7:52
  Your
• 7:52
  money
• 7:52
  structure
• 7:53
  should
• 7:53
  reduce
• 7:54
  tension.
• 7:54
  If
• 7:54
  you're
• 7:54
  doing
• 7:54
  this
• 7:55
  right,
• 7:55
  you're
• 7:56
  not
• 7:56
  answering
• 7:56
  the
• 7:56
  question
• 7:57
  about,
• 7:57
  do
• 7:57
  we
• 7:57
  have
• 7:57
  separate
• 7:58
  accounts
• 7:58
  or
• 7:58
  not.
• 7:59
  It's
• 7:59
  are
• 7:59
  you
• 7:59
  living
• 7:59
  in
• 8:00
  peace?
• 8:01
  Think
• 8:01
  about
• 8:01
  these
• 8:01
  red
• 8:01
  flags.
• 8:02
  If
• 8:02
  you're
• 8:02
  in
• 8:02
  a
• 8:03
  relationship
• 8:03
  right
• 8:03
  now
• 8:04
  and
• 8:04
  when
• 8:04
  it
• 8:04
  comes
• 8:04
  to
• 8:04
  money,
• 8:04
  you
• 8:05
  have
• 8:05
  fear,
• 8:05
  or
• 8:06
  if
• 8:06
  you're
• 8:06
  constantly
• 8:06
  checking
• 8:07
  somebody
• 8:07
  or
• 8:08
  if
• 8:08
  there's
• 8:08
  resentment,
• 8:09
  there's
• 8:10
  a
• 8:10
  problem
• 8:10
  with
• 8:10
  peace.
• 8:11
  You
• 8:11
  got
• 8:11
  to
• 8:12
  adjust
• 8:12
  the
• 8:12
  system
• 8:13
  if
• 8:13
  it
• 8:13
  increases
• 8:14
  that
• 8:14
  strain,
• 8:15
  because
• 8:15
  money
• 8:16
  should
• 8:16
  support
• 8:16
  your
• 8:16
  life,
• 8:17
  not
• 8:17
  strain
• 8:17
  the
• 8:18
  relationship.
• 8:19
  We
• 8:19
  got
• 8:19
  to
• 8:19
  make
• 8:20
  a
• 8:20
  change
• 8:20
  here,
• 8:21
  which
• 8:21
  leads
• 8:21
  us
• 8:21
  to
• 8:21
  our
• 8:22
  Bible
• 8:22
  verse
• 8:22
  for
• 8:23
  today.
• 8:23
  Genesis,
• 8:24
  chapter
• 8:24
  2,
• 8:24
  verse
• 8:25
  24.
• 8:26
  This
• 8:26
  is
• 8:26
  why
• 8:26
  a
• 8:26
  man
• 8:26
  leaves
• 8:27
  his
• 8:27
  father
• 8:27
  and
• 8:27
  mother
• 8:28
  and
• 8:28
  is
• 8:28
  united
• 8:29
  to
• 8:29
  his
• 8:29
  wife
• 8:30
  and
• 8:30
  they
• 8:30
  become
• 8:31
  one
• 8:31
  flesh.
• 8:32
  And
• 8:32
  I
• 8:32
  love
• 8:33
  this
• 8:33
  verse
• 8:34
  because
• 8:34
  Scripture
• 8:35
  emphasizes
• 8:36
  exactly
• 8:36
  what
• 8:36
  I'm
• 8:36
  talking
• 8:37
  about
• 8:37
  here.
• 8:37
  That
• 8:37
  oneness,
• 8:38
  that
• 8:39
  shared
• 8:39
  life,
• 8:39
  that
• 8:40
  shared
• 8:40
  direction.
• 8:41
  Because
• 8:42
  God
• 8:42
  gives
• 8:42
  us
• 8:43
  just
• 8:43
  one
• 8:43
  principle
• 8:44
  here.
• 8:44
  Oneness.
• 8:44
  He
• 8:45
  doesn't
• 8:45
  say
• 8:45
  have
• 8:45
  separate
• 8:46
  accounts,
• 8:46
  have
• 8:47
  joined
• 8:47
  accounts.
• 8:47
  He
• 8:48
  just
• 8:48
  says
• 8:48
  oneness.
• 8:49
  And
• 8:50
  that
• 8:50
  wisdom
• 8:50
  applies
• 8:51
  it
• 8:51
  to
• 8:51
  the
• 8:51
  structure.
• 8:52
  Your
• 8:52
  structure
• 8:53
  should
• 8:53
  serve
• 8:53
  unity,
• 8:54
  not
• 8:54
  replace
• 8:55
  it.
• 8:56
  God
• 8:56
  gives
• 8:56
  us
• 8:56
  the
• 8:57
  principle
• 8:57
  and
• 8:58
  wisdom
• 8:58
  applies
• 8:59
  it.
• 8:59
  So
• 9:00
  here's
• 9:00
  your
• 9:00
  simple
• 9:00
  step
• 9:00
  for
• 9:01
  today.
• 9:01
  I
• 9:01
  want
• 9:01
  you
• 9:01
  to
• 9:02
  sit
• 9:02
  down
• 9:02
  together
• 9:02
  and
• 9:03
  ask
• 9:03
  this
• 9:04
  question.
• 9:04
  And
• 9:04
  listen.
• 9:05
  Be
• 9:05
  prepared
• 9:05
  for
• 9:06
  the
• 9:06
  answer.
• 9:06
  Do
• 9:07
  our
• 9:07
  finances
• 9:08
  reflect
• 9:08
  unity
• 9:08
  or
• 9:09
  avoidance?
• 9:10
  It's
• 9:10
  really
• 9:10
  that
• 9:10
  simple.
• 9:11
  Do
• 9:11
  our
• 9:11
  finances
• 9:11
  reflect
• 9:12
  unity
• 9:12
  or
• 9:13
  avoidance?
• 9:13
  There's
• 9:13
  no
• 9:14
  defending,
• 9:14
  no
• 9:15
  fixing.
• 9:15
  This
• 9:15
  is
• 9:16
  just
• 9:16
  a
• 9:16
  time
• 9:16
  to
• 9:17
  listen.
• 9:17
  That
• 9:18
  conversation
• 9:18
  for
• 9:19
  so
• 9:19
  many
• 9:20
  alone,
• 9:20
  just
• 9:20
  that
• 9:21
  conversation
• 9:21
  alone
• 9:21
  will
• 9:22
  be
• 9:22
  progress.
• 9:23
  How
• 9:23
  about
• 9:23
  we
• 9:24
  pray
• 9:24
  together?
• 9:24
  Lord,
• 9:25
  thank
• 9:25
  you
• 9:25
  for
• 9:25
  caring
• 9:26
  about
• 9:26
  both
• 9:26
  our
• 9:27
  finances
• 9:27
  and
• 9:27
  our
• 9:28
  hearts.
• 9:28
  Help
• 9:29
  couples
• 9:29
  walk
• 9:29
  in
• 9:30
  trust
• 9:30
  and
• 9:30
  replace
• 9:30
  fear
• 9:31
  with
• 9:31
  wisdom
• 9:32
  and
• 9:32
  replace
• 9:32
  tension
• 9:33
  with
• 9:33
  unity.
• 9:34
  Guide
• 9:34
  them
• 9:34
  as
• 9:35
  they
• 9:35
  structure
• 9:35
  their
• 9:35
  money
• 9:36
  in
• 9:36
  ways
• 9:36
  that
• 9:36
  honor
• 9:37
  you
• 9:37
  and
• 9:37
  truly
• 9:38
  protect
• 9:38
  their
• 9:38
  relationship.
• 9:39
  And
• 9:39
  we
• 9:39
  ask
• 9:40
  this
• 9:40
  in
• 9:40
  Jesus
• 9:41
  name.
• 9:42
  Amen,
• 9:43
  friend.
• 9:43
  If
• 9:43
  money
• 9:44
  has
• 9:44
  been
• 9:44
  a
• 9:44
  source
• 9:45
  of
• 9:45
  guilt
• 9:45
  or
• 9:45
  pressure
• 9:46
  for
• 9:46
  you,
• 9:46
  pause
• 9:47
  here
• 9:47
  for
• 9:47
  a
• 9:47
  moment.
• 9:48
  There
• 9:48
  is
• 9:48
  a
• 9:49
  better
• 9:49
  way
• 9:49
  to
• 9:49
  move
• 9:50
  forward.
• 9:50
  And
• 9:51
  I've
• 9:51
  got
• 9:51
  a
• 9:51
  book
• 9:51
  I
• 9:51
  just
• 9:51
  wrote
• 9:52
  about
• 9:52
  this.
• 9:52
  It's
• 9:52
  called
• 9:52
  how
• 9:52
  to
• 9:53
  Become
• 9:53
  a
• 9:53
  Financially
• 9:53
  Confident
• 9:54
  Christian.
• 9:54
  And
• 9:55
  it's
• 9:55
  all
• 9:55
  about
• 9:55
  finding
• 9:56
  peace
• 9:56
  and
• 9:56
  clarity
• 9:57
  and
• 9:58
  confidence
• 9:58
  with
• 9:58
  money
• 9:58
  while
• 9:59
  learning
• 9:59
  to
• 9:59
  trust
• 9:59
  God
• 10:00
  again.
• 10:00
  It's
• 10:01
  not
• 10:01
  about
• 10:01
  lectures.
• 10:01
  It's
• 10:02
  not
• 10:02
  about
• 10:02
  shame.
• 10:02
  Just
• 10:03
  a
• 10:03
  simple,
• 10:03
  faithful
• 10:04
  next
• 10:04
  step.
• 10:04
  And
• 10:05
  you
• 10:05
  can
• 10:05
  grab
• 10:05
  your
• 10:05
  own
• 10:05
  copy
• 10:07
  at
• 10:08
  financiallyconfidentchristian.com.com/becoming
• 10:10
  that's
• 10:10
  financiallyconfidentchristian.com/becoming
• 10:14
  friend.
• 10:14
  Unity
• 10:15
  is
• 10:15
  built
• 10:15
  one
• 10:16
  conversation
• 10:16
  at
• 10:17
  a
• 10:17
  time.
• 10:17
  So
• 10:17
  have
• 10:17
  that
• 10:17
  conversation
• 10:18
  today.
• 10:19
  You
• 10:19
  don't
• 10:19
  need
• 10:20
  a
• 10:20
  perfect
• 10:20
  system.
• 10:21
  You
• 10:21
  just
• 10:21
  need
• 10:22
  open
• 10:22
  and
• 10:22
  honest
• 10:23
  communication.
• 10:24
  And
• 10:25
  this
• 10:25
  topic
• 10:25
  has
• 10:25
  been
• 10:26
  hard
• 10:26
  before.
• 10:27
  You
• 10:27
  can
• 10:27
  start
• 10:27
  again
• 10:28
  today.
• 10:28
  Just
• 10:29
  one
• 10:29
  conversation,
• 10:30
  one
• 10:30
  agreement,
• 10:31
  one
• 10:31
  step
• 10:32
  forward.
• 10:32
  And
• 10:33
  let
• 10:33
  me
• 10:33
  tell
• 10:33
  you
• 10:33
  right
• 10:33
  now,
• 10:33
  you're
• 10:34
  going
• 10:34
  to
• 10:34
  be
• 10:34
  okay.
• 10:35
  Now,
• 10:35
  tomorrow
• 10:35
  we're
• 10:36
  going
• 10:36
  to
• 10:36
  talk
• 10:36
  about
• 10:36
  another
• 10:36
  big
• 10:37
  question,
• 10:37
  and
• 10:37
  that's
• 10:38
  money
• 10:38
  boundaries
• 10:38
  with
• 10:39
  family.
• 10:39
  Let
• 10:39
  me
• 10:39
  tell
• 10:40
  you
• 10:40
  right
• 10:40
  now,
• 10:40
  be
• 10:40
  prepared.
• 10:41
  We're
• 10:41
  going
• 10:42
  about
• 10:42
  protecting
• 10:42
  your
• 10:43
  wallet
• 10:43
  and
• 10:44
  protecting
• 10:44
  the
• 10:44
  love
• 10:44
  for
• 10:45
  your
• 10:45
  family.
• 10:46
  And
• 10:46
  if
• 10:46
  this
• 10:46
  episode
• 10:46
  helped
• 10:47
  you,
• 10:47
  I'm
• 10:47
  going
• 10:47
  to
• 10:47
  encourage
• 10:47
  you
• 10:47
  to
• 10:47
  share
• 10:48
  with
• 10:48
  somebody
• 10:48
  else
• 10:48
  that's
• 10:48
  navigating
• 10:49
  this
• 10:49
  same
• 10:49
  question.
• 10:50
  Maybe,
• 10:50
  you
• 10:50
  know,
• 10:50
  another
• 10:51
  couple
• 10:51
  that's
• 10:51
  thinking
• 10:51
  about
• 10:52
  this
• 10:52
  right
• 10:52
  now,
• 10:53
  share
• 10:53
  this
• 10:53
  show
• 10:53
  with
• 10:54
  them.
• 10:54
  Because
• 10:54
  this
• 10:54
  show
• 10:55
  is
• 10:55
  not
• 10:55
  about
• 10:55
  financial
• 10:56
  shame.
• 10:57
  It's
• 10:57
  about
• 10:57
  walking
• 10:57
  in
• 10:58
  wisdom,
• 10:58
  staying
• 10:59
  steady,
• 10:59
  and
• 11:00
  truly
• 11:00
  becoming
• 11:01
  a
• 11:01
  financially
• 11:02
  confident
• 11:02
  Christian.
• 11:03
  God
• 11:03
  bless
• 11:03
  you,
• 11:03
  friend.
• 11:04
  And
• 11:04
  I'll
• 11:04
  see
• 11:04
  you
• 11:04
  again
• 11:04
  on
• 11:05
  tomorrow's
• 11:05
  show.