Latest / The D.L. Hughley Show / DLHS Hour 2 | Parental Alienation Debate

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DLHS Hour 2 | Parental Alienation Debate · The D.L. Hughley Show

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  Speaker 1: It is the D.L. Hughley Show, your 2026 edition. Take
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  Speaker 1: a listen to this audio.
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  Speaker 2: My parents were married, and then they had me. I
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  Speaker 2: guess their marriage was difficult, so they later got divorced.
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  Speaker 2: I don't know why. I don't know the details. All
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  Speaker 2: I know is that they separated, so I used to
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  Speaker 2: be with my mother one week, and then I'll go
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  Speaker 2: be with my father the next week, okay?
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  Speaker 1: So back and forth.
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  Speaker 2: One week, my dad never showed up to come and
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  Speaker 2: pick me up. I sat by the door, literally waiting
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  Speaker 2: and waiting. He never showed up. The following week, I
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  Speaker 2: did the same thing. I did this for months, okay?
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  Speaker 2: He never came.
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  Speaker 1: So I felt so rejected, okay?
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  Speaker 3: I still quite literally turn into that little girl when
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  Speaker 3: I talk about it.
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  Speaker 2: It has.
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  Speaker 3: Changed the trajectory of my life, okay? So I didn't
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  Speaker 3: find out until literally recently as an adult that my
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  Speaker 3: father did not abandon me. My mother cut him off
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  Speaker 3: because she was afraid that he was going to take
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  Speaker 3: me from her.
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  Speaker 1: Now, we have discussions like this all the time, Sanders, obviously.
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  Speaker 1: We come at this from two different perspectives, but based
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  Speaker 1: on our own individual experiences. So you think what about this?
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  Speaker 5: Like I said, I know from a legal perspective, there's
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  Speaker 5: really not a lot that can be done unless it's
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  Speaker 5: a court ordered situation. If it's court ordered custody or
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  Speaker 5: a visitation plan is in place and you violate that,
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  Speaker 5: there are consequences. Outside of that, legally, nothing you can do.
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  Speaker 5: I do think it's unfortunate because I know for sure
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  Speaker 5: there are cases where you're upset Or the father is
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  Speaker 5: upset and you use the child as a pawn. I
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  Speaker 5: don't know what you could do to deter that. I mean,
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  Speaker 5: mature relationships. I mean, I have no idea. But again,
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  Speaker 5: I do think when the child gets older and they
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  Speaker 5: realize that you have lied to them, I think there
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  Speaker 5: will be a lot of damage done to that relationship.
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  Speaker 5: And I think that that might end up being, you know,
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  Speaker 5: punishment enough. I just I don't know. It's a difficult thing.
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  Speaker 1: You know, I have a very, I don't see, I
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  Speaker 1: can call it nuance and you guys might think it's simplistic,
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  Speaker 1: but I don't, I think laws exist because people saw
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  Speaker 1: there was a need for something to change in a dynamic, right?
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  Speaker 2: Right.
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  Speaker 1: That's why laws exist. It wasn't always against the law
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  Speaker 1: not to pay child support. It wasn't always against the law.
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  Speaker 1: Some of the laws we have in place, all of
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  Speaker 1: them came as a remedy, right?
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  Speaker 6: Correct.
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  Speaker 2: Right.
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  Speaker 1: And I think that there is an inherent way that
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  Speaker 1: society looks at somebody who's not financially responsible for a child.
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  Speaker 1: There's an inherent way they look at that. And what
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  Speaker 1: they did was they had a legal remedy for that, right?
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  Speaker 1: I don't think that there's a requisite view of that
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  Speaker 1: in terms of the emotional damage that parents do to children.
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  Speaker 1: We have laws against abuse. So I think that because
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  Speaker 1: We know that things like this happen. We write laws
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  Speaker 1: to remedy societal ills to some degree.
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  Speaker 2: Right.
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  Speaker 7: And so.
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  Speaker 5: But I think I think on the back end of that.
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  Speaker 5: Carry on, Professor X.
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  Speaker 1: Carry on. What do you think the remedy for that
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  Speaker 1: should be, Junice? What do you think it should be?
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  Speaker 8: Well, these are always touchy subjects. I mean, because there
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  Speaker 8: are variables involved that, you know, we're not exactly sure of,
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  Speaker 8: you know, because depending on how the severity of the
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  Speaker 8: breakup was or the trauma involved, you know, like, say,
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  Speaker 8: for instance, if it was a rape or something, you know,
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  Speaker 8: you just don't know. You would not share that with
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  Speaker 8: a child or make up an inappropriate story. But if
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  Speaker 8: it's just pure malice, then there should be some kind of.
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  Speaker 1: It can't just be nothing.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: I think that if it were... Whenever something like this
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  Speaker 1: is perpetrated, and this is regardless of what we do,
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  Speaker 1: if it's a man perpetrating a thing, society tends to
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  Speaker 1: think that that needs a legal remedy.
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  Speaker 6: Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: When if a woman is primarily perpetrating a thing, it
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  Speaker 1: has a different nuanced view. The law feels like, well,
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  Speaker 1: that's just something that I have to accept. But I
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  Speaker 1: know for me, for years and years and years, my
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  Speaker 1: mother told me what a horrible man my father was.
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  Speaker 1: And when I met him, I had only her version
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  Speaker 1: of it. And when he died, when my mother called me,
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  Speaker 1: and you remember this, Sanders, like boohooing. And when she,
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  Speaker 1: I was in New York. I'll never forget. She's like,
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  Speaker 1: your father died. And I was like, oh, I was crying.
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  Speaker 1: I mean, she was beside herself. And I was like,
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  Speaker 1: my daddy? And she said, I got to get home.
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  Speaker 1: She's like, oh, no, no, your biological father.
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  Speaker 7: And I'm like, what?
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  Speaker 1: Why are you crying for him? You call me with
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  Speaker 1: this crime for this? Yeah. And then she told me
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  Speaker 1: she had always had a relationship with him and he
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  Speaker 1: wasn't as bad as she thought she'd put on.
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  Speaker 9: Wow.
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  Speaker 1: Now that to me, I'm angry with her now because
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  Speaker 1: not only she treated my father crazy, the one who
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  Speaker 1: raised me, but she denied me an opportunity to know
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  Speaker 1: that man who had been looking for me.
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  Speaker 7: The whole time.
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  Speaker 8: And shaped your opinion of him.
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  Speaker 1: And shaped my opinion of the world.
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  Speaker 9: Yeah. Oh, man.
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  Speaker 1: Like, I always wanted to be a Hugo. I never
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  Speaker 1: was a Hugo. I found out that the name I had,
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  Speaker 1: the people that I come from, literally only area I
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  Speaker 1: live in now, they came from the South. They built,
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  Speaker 1: there's a place in LA called Ballard Mountain. They called
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  Speaker 1: it North Head Mountain. They changed it to Ballard Mountain.
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  Speaker 1: Those were my forefathers. That is five minutes from where
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  Speaker 1: I live. So you took my birthright away from me.
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  Speaker 1: That's not to me.
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  Speaker 5: This is the unfortunate part. It's hurtful.
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  Speaker 1: It's horrible.
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  Speaker 5: It's a horrible thing to do, not only to a child,
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  Speaker 5: but to a young man and certainly an older man, period,
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  Speaker 5: whenever you find out the lie. Unfortunately, lying is not
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  Speaker 5: a crime. We know that just by the world that
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  Speaker 5: we live in.
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  Speaker 1: No, it's not.
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  Speaker 5: Inherently, it is not a crime. The only way it
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  Speaker 5: is a crime is that if you commit perjury, if
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  Speaker 5: you lie to federal officials, if you file a false
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  Speaker 5: police report or fraud to obtain money, property benefits or
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  Speaker 5: anything like that, or any kind of ID lying. But
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  Speaker 5: in terms of lying about whether or not This person
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  Speaker 5: is this or that in terms of their character. That
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  Speaker 5: is not a lie. It's a horrible thing.
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  Speaker 1: Now, it should be. And a lot of things weren't
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  Speaker 1: laws until somebody made them that way. The laws like
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  Speaker 1: that have champions.
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  Speaker 2: Right.
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  Speaker 1: There are people who champion a law that they go
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  Speaker 1: for Congress. They tell stories. They right. They supplicate billmakers.
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  Speaker 1: So just because it isn't a law doesn't mean it
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  Speaker 1: shouldn't be.
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  Speaker 10: Yeah.
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  Speaker 5: Oh, absolutely. But I think you hit the nail on
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  Speaker 5: the head. And that is, someone has to lobby for that, right?
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  Speaker 5: No one has done it. Because there's no extensive studies
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  Speaker 5: that have been done to show that it's proofing.
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  Speaker 1: I'm not going to be the one to start it off.
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  Speaker 9: Oh, see.
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  Speaker 1: Oh, okay, okay, okay.
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  Speaker 5: You want somebody else to do the heavy lifting.
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  Speaker 1: No, no, I'm just saying. I'm just saying. I think
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  Speaker 1: that it is unreasonable to say that this doesn't have
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  Speaker 1: something that I think there should be a legal remedy for.
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  Speaker 6: For sure.
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  Speaker 1: There could be a civil situation, but you can't.
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  Speaker 5: No, I totally agree with you.
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  Speaker 1: You can be wrecking people's lives and there's no recompense.
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  Speaker 1: I think that that's untenable. What do you think the
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  Speaker 1: remedy for that should be? We're going right to the phones.
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  Speaker 10: The consequences to somebody demonstrating that type of behavior of
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  Speaker 10: denying a child a healthy life experience with their own
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  Speaker 10: parents particularly a black girl with their father, should be severe. However,
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  Speaker 10: no matter what the punishment is, there's not going to
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  Speaker 10: be a replacement for those opportunity and time, pictures, videos, conversations, cards,
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  Speaker 10: and other life experiences connected to the healthy development of
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  Speaker 10: that child with their parent, particularly a father. Those aren't
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  Speaker 10: going to be replaced. So no matter what the consequences are,
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  Speaker 10: opportunity and time, is gone, and it's your fault if
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  Speaker 10: you were the one involved with helping to contribute to
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  Speaker 10: that type of behavior, whether you be just a parent
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  Speaker 10: or a parent's henchman, you know?
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  Speaker 11: I feel very sad for the young lady that this
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  Speaker 11: happened to. I can't imagine not knowing my father. I
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  Speaker 11: couldn't imagine it. I knew both of my parents. They
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  Speaker 11: raised me and all my siblings, and I just couldn't
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  Speaker 11: imagine being in that situation, but I do have one.
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  Speaker 11: I did want to say that I learned a very
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  Speaker 11: long time ago not to get involved in that revenge
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  Speaker 11: game because I feel like that's what happened with her parents.
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  Speaker 11: They are playing some kind of revenge game or, you know,
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  Speaker 11: or whether they meant to do it or not, it
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  Speaker 11: affected her in a very negative way. And I feel
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  Speaker 11: like what should happen is what is already happening. which
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  Speaker 11: is that now the other living parent is going to
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  Speaker 11: have to deal with how this child feels about what
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  Speaker 11: they did, about what both of them did. Now both
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  Speaker 11: of them can't confront it. Now it's just one parent
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  Speaker 11: that has to confront what has happened. I hope that
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  Speaker 11: this young lady does confront the other parent. I hope
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  Speaker 11: that she finds, you know, peace.
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  Speaker 6: And all that.
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  Speaker 11: But I learned a long time ago, you don't play
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  Speaker 11: this revenge game. I'm a Christian, so I believe vengeance
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  Speaker 11: is the Lord's.
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  Speaker 6: So I just got in my car and I heard
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  Speaker 6: the conversation. And I can resonate with that because I
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  Speaker 6: have two daughters who are, one is in her latter
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  Speaker 6: 30s and the other one is in her younger 30s.
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  Speaker 6: And both of their mothers withheld them from me for decades.
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  Speaker 6: 30 plus years. And we both came to me. One
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  Speaker 6: came to me about five years ago and said, my
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  Speaker 6: mom finally admitted that she lied about you and she
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  Speaker 6: kept me away from you. And the other one did
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  Speaker 6: the same thing, said, my mom admitted that she lied
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  Speaker 6: about you and kept me away from you. So I'm
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  Speaker 6: going through the same thing that, you know, most men
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  Speaker 6: are going through in in that situation and i understand
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  Speaker 6: i heard the girls uh the young lady's pain who
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  Speaker 6: was speaking out on it so i understand and uh
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  Speaker 6: yeah so it's wrong and right now i'm trying to
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  Speaker 6: bridge the gap with my daughters and develop a relationship
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  Speaker 6: after 30 years.
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  Speaker 9: My husband is actually going through something similar to that.
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  Speaker 9: When we got together, he explained everything to me and
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  Speaker 9: how his child's mother has him on child support and
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  Speaker 9: how the arrears and everything and how he was in
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  Speaker 9: his child's life for the first little bit of her life.
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  Speaker 9: And then the mother just up and left and pretty
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  Speaker 9: much told the courts that she was scared for her life.
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  Speaker 9: and made everything private. And he didn't know he was
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  Speaker 9: right up until, I mean, honestly, when we got together.
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  Speaker 9: And we started doing research, and we found out what,
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  Speaker 9: you know.
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  Speaker 4: What he actually and his rights were.
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  Speaker 9: And, you know, they've got him on false allegations. He's
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  Speaker 9: going to take her to court for false allegations, for
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  Speaker 9: child alienation. His child is 16 years old, and he
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  Speaker 9: hasn't got to see her since she was 5. We
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  Speaker 9: did our research, and we found out what we can
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  Speaker 9: do and what we can't do. Court, and it's just
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  Speaker 9: a whole lot of mess that's going on. When y'all
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  Speaker 9: were talking about it on the ready, I was like, dang, like,
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  Speaker 9: that's exactly what my husband's going through right now.
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  Speaker 1: So here is the scenario.
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  Speaker 2: My parents were married, and then they had me. I
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  Speaker 2: guess their marriage was difficult, so they later got divorced.
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  Speaker 2: I don't know why.
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  Speaker 1: I don't know the details.
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  Speaker 2: All I know is that they separated. So I used
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  Speaker 2: to be with my mother one week and then I'll
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  Speaker 2: go be with my father the next week. OK, so
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  Speaker 2: back and forth. One week, my dad never showed up
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  Speaker 2: to come and pick me up. I sat by the door,
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  Speaker 2: literally waiting and waiting. He never showed up. The following week,
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  Speaker 2: I did the same thing. I did this for months. OK,
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  Speaker 2: he never came back. So I felt so rejected, okay?
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  Speaker 2: I still quite.
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  Speaker 3: Literally turn into that little girl when I talk about it.
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  Speaker 2: It has changed the trajectory of my life, okay?
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  Speaker 1: So I didn't find out.
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  Speaker 3: Until literally recently as an adult that my father did
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  Speaker 3: not abandon me. My mother cut him off because she
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  Speaker 3: was afraid that he was going to take me from her, okay?
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  Speaker 3: So I literally had to grow up without a father
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  Speaker 3: thinking that my father didn't love me. So I would
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  Speaker 3: go on dating these men who were amazing to me.
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  Speaker 3: I've had wonderful relationships and I would literally feel like
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  Speaker 3: the love was never enough because my father didn't love me.
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  Speaker 3: How could another man love me?
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  Speaker 1: What do you think the remedy for that should be?
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  Speaker 1: We're going right to the phones.
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  Speaker 7: My son is going through the same situation. He pays
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  Speaker 7: child support every week. He's caught up on his rears,
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  Speaker 7: but he can't seem to talk to the kids. And
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  Speaker 7: it's been some months now. I think the last time
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  Speaker 7: the kids been over to my house, their nana, was
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  Speaker 7: last year in the summertime. And that was the last
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  Speaker 7: time we saw them. And the mom, she has this,
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  Speaker 7: I don't know, some sort of vendetta, all because she
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  Speaker 7: wants my son to be with her and the kids.
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  Speaker 7: But I have a funny feeling that she's feeding the
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  Speaker 7: kids a lot of negativity about their dad. And the
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  Speaker 7: only thing my son, he won't reach out or anything.
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  Speaker 7: I mean, he has been reaching out. But it's like, well,
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  Speaker 7: I guess I have to wait until the kids get
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  Speaker 7: older in order for them to accept me. I said,
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  Speaker 7: but what if they don't accept you because of what
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  Speaker 7: she's feeding them?
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  Speaker 12: Well, basically, I'm one who's going through it myself, dealing
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  Speaker 12: with a woman that is, you know, basically keeping me
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  Speaker 12: from my child. I've been going through this for about
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  Speaker 12: three years, four years now, and still there's no consequence
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  Speaker 12: in the courtroom.
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  Speaker 2: At all.
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  Speaker 12: He's violated plenty of times and I've never gotten any
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  Speaker 12: remedy over it. And I tell her all the time
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  Speaker 12: that you're going to make his child resent you when
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  Speaker 12: he gets older because he's going to find out that
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  Speaker 12: I've never abandoned him.
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  Speaker 4: I stay fighting.
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  Speaker 12: I stay fighting all the time and I'm not going
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  Speaker 12: to stop, but there needs to be some kind of
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  Speaker 12: consequence to this.
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  Speaker 4: I think the child should be able to see their parents. Yeah,
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  Speaker 4: even if the man is a deadbeat man, a deadbeat father,
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  Speaker 4: it should be up to the child to still see
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  Speaker 4: their parent and let them figure out what they want
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  Speaker 4: to do with that parent. I even let my child
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  Speaker 4: make the choice when they were younger.
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  Speaker 1: I said, you know what?
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  Speaker 4: He's going to find out. I'm not going to tell
• 14:51
  Speaker 4: him anything. I'll take care of him. And he sees
• 14:55
  Speaker 4: who takes care of him.
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: Now it's time for our feature. Welcome to the stage
• 14:59
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  Speaker 1: wait a minute, wait a minute.
• 15:03
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• 15:06
  Speaker 8: make you feel some type of way.
• 15:08
  Speaker 5: Welcome to the stage, Trey Tutson.
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: I found out that I don't like tall people. That's
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: just what it is. I see you, my man. Everything,
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: I hope none of your dreams come true.
• 15:17
  Speaker 2: You know what I mean?
• 15:18
  Speaker 10: I really do.
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: How tall are you, big dog?
• 15:21
  Speaker 9: Six, eight?
• 15:21
  Speaker 10: F * * * you, fam.
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: What the hell?
• 15:23
  Speaker 10: What the hell?
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: This is my problem with you, 6'8. You don't empathize
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: with short people paying. 6'8, you don't know what it's
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: like to have to put your car in park to
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: put a gate code in. You have no idea what
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: that's like, 6'8. That is a funny dude right there.