Latest / Mic Drop Comedy / NYC_s Joyous Knicks Victory Celebration vs. Trump_s Joyless White House UFC Fight _ The Daily Show

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NYC_s Joyous Knicks Victory Celebration vs. Trump_s Joyless White House UFC Fight _ The Daily Show · Mic Drop Comedy

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Go, New York, go, New York, go. Go, New York, go,
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: New York, go. Hey, everybody. Welcome to The Daily Show.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: My name is John Stewart. We've got a great show
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: for you tonight.
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: Later on, we're going to be joined by Senator Reverend Dr.
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: Raphael Warnock of the great state of Georgia. He's going
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: to be coming.
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: Out.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: But first things first, how was your weekend?
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: Did you do like I did and have an Iran
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: negotiations watch party?
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: Fire. Right?
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: You know, for a while, it felt like the Iran
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: war was slipping away from us. Just felt like every negotiation,
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: we just had too big a petroleum deficit to overcome.
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: But for those of us who believed, Enough to stick
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: it out. Saturday night, out of nowhere, was the moment we've.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: Been waiting for. President Trump says the U.S.
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: And Iran have reached an agreement to negotiate an end
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: to the war. Man! I cannot believe how invested our
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: country is in freeing maritime shipping lanes.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: Give Donald Trump credit. He inherited a mess. President Obama
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: made a deal, the Iran nuclear deal, which was a
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: terrible deal. That horrible, stupid deal where President Obama paid
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: $ 150 billion for nothing. So they tried to bribe them
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: to make a deal. That didn't work. It never works. Unbelievable, exactly.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: Thank you, sir. What kind of idiot.
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: Would try and dangle billions of dollars in exchange for
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: a deal with Iran?
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: We're learning more details right now about the agreement to
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: end the war with Iran.
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: US officials did mention that in addition to sanctions relief
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: and the unfreezing of Iranian funds, there could be something
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: like a $ 300 billion fund to help rebuild Iran.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: I guess it's that kind.
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: Of f * * * ing idiot.
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: There you have it, folks. Done.
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: Only the great Donald Trump could fight a costly war
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: to get the United States to remove the sanctions put
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: on Iran by Donald Trump. In the words of the
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: great Winston Churchill, you played yourself. But the important thing
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: is we're going to focus the entirety of the show
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: today on the complexity of what a new nuclear enrichment
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: inspection regime will look like for the hardliners that are
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: now in Kentucky.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: I'm just with you the whole time. This whole show,
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: I've just been with you. You know what we're going
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: to talk about? On Saturday night, this free throw from
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: OG Ananobi. Ice, a 94-90 victory by New York Knickerbockers, ending.
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: 53 years of basketball futility. And the people responded with
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: the appropriate level of chill. Let's go, Nick! Let's go, Nick!
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: Let's go, Nick! Let's go, Nick! By the way, you
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: ever be sitting at home and you're watching this kind
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: of footage and you wonder to yourself.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: Who the f * * * are these people? Out
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: in the streets of New York losing their minds. Well,
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: funny story.
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: The little guy on top of that other guy's shoulders,
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: he works here.
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: That's one of our.
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: That came across our feet, and we're like, what the
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: f * * *? That's one of our writers, Mr.
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: Scott Herkman. Scott!
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: Hey, boss. Hey, just out of curiosity, was that you
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: in that video? No. Scott? Yeah. Just a random question.
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: Why are you still on the shoulders?
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: I'm very superstitious, so I'm up here until next year's finals.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: Let's go! All right, get out of here. Scott and Guy,
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: Scott sits on now. Get out of here. Give me
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: that jersey and get out of here. All right, get
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: out of here.
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: That was my favorite part. It was an incredible night.
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: All across the city, everyone was out celebrating. They were
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: in the streets. They were in the subways. We had
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: drum lines. We had bagpipes. We had fireworks.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: Bagpipes.
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: And we had an MTA bus driver breaking it down.
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: MTA? More like MT Slay.
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: By the way, I love how the bus driver gave
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: back the liquor bottle they handed him. Like, no, seriously,
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: I do have to drive. I am, in fact, a
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: professional bus driver who works. It was such a special night.
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: The Knicks victory brought out appearances by the entire NYCU.
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: There was Spider-Man. And there was also Spider-Man. And then
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: there was, of course, Spider-Man.
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: And, oh, no, Spider-Man. And then there was Batman. And,
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: of course, back to Spider-Man. Amazing. We champs. Finally. It's
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: been forever. Who gave Spider-Man the microphone?
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: By the way, I wonder if when those Spider-Men saw
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: each other, if there was any confusion about which one was.
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: I wonder if they were.
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: All right. I'm acting out there.
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: All right.
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: And then just when you thought it was over, NYCU
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: brought out a post-credit cut scene of the Hulk.
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: Hulk smash! Hulk angry! Hulk bet spurs in six!
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: That tube was just whaling on anybody.
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: But you know what's crazy?
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: If that guy throwing them haymakers had been Wemby, the refs.
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: Wouldn't have called it a foul. They would not. They
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: would have let it go. He could have been throwing those.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: How can you expect him to control his movements? His
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: arms are so long. How can you not trip people?
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: He's 112 feet tall. Would you call a foul on
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: the Empire State Building? No, you wouldn't.
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: And by the way, New York is so awesome that
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: even the people here that aren't superheroes were suddenly superheroes.
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: It's like the whole city had been bitten by a
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: radioactive spider.
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: My favorite, though, was.
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: This guy casually parkouring across a light fixture to go
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: from one end of the bus to the other.
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: That's badass, because I don't know if you know this
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: on those buses, perfectly passable aisle. You could have just
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: walked down the aisle.
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: And ladies and gentlemen, while I am not technically in
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: light post scaling shape, I did attend the festivities.
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: My friend, Mr.
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: Robert Smigel, one of his sons, my son, my wife,
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: down in the village, outdoor watch party, pretty cool, and
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: I handled it. I was pretty, pretty cool. To be
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: fair to me, I thought I was filming the game
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: and I just don't know how.
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: To work my phone. Oh, my God! Does it really sound.
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: Like I just got a perfect colonoscopy report?
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God! Not a polyp in sight!
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: There was truly no place I would have rather been
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: than right on the streets of New York. And shout
• 10:11
  Speaker 2: out to the unsung MVPs of the night, the people
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: who had the genius idea to go out on their
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: fire escapes and project the game onto the sides of buildings.
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: No matter where you were, the game was on, from
• 10:22
  Speaker 2: Central Park to those phone-charging kiosks.
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: To atop the head of this one kindly gentleman. It
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: was amazing. Four hours.
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: No one had the heart to tell him, you have
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: to plug it in. And of course, our always MVPs
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: who keep this city safe and clean for the rest
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: of us to enjoy. New York's finest, New York's bravest,
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: and New York's definitely strongest, the sanitation department. And also,
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: these two guys who clearly thought, this is our chance
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: to do our part and help out the city. and
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: get rid of a body. T-shirt bros aren't out on
• 11:18
  Speaker 2: the city at 5 AM throwing garbage bags into a
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: truck unless they really need to get rid of shit.
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: I left the city at 3 a.m. It was a
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: bit of a mess.
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: By 8 a.m., it's like the night never happened because
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: they had to get ready for the Puerto Rican Day Parade,
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: the World Cup, and Pride.
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: Shit cray here. And they did it unbelievably well and beautifully.
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: The point is, this whole moment really showed the joy
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: and beauty of life in this big city. I have
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: to tell you, I was so proud.
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: So happy.
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: Truly, I'll be honest, I don't think there's anyone out
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: there who could look at those celebrations and see anything
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: other than America at its best. Celebrations turning into full-blown chaos.
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: Mayhem in Manhattan. Unruly troublemakers.
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: One person was shot, four injured in slashings or stabbings,
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: and five police cars were badly damaged.
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: Um, on a Saturday night? I think that might be
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: a record low.
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: But I get what they're trying to do. I get
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: what they're trying to do. They're focusing on the bad stuff.
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: To portray that the prevailing emotion and behavior in New
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: York City on that Saturday night was one of chaos
• 12:44
  Speaker 2: and barbarity. But I was there.
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: You're lying.
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: It wasn't. It was an overwhelming sense of joy and
• 12:52
  Speaker 2: solidarity and diversity and community and a good amount of
• 12:57
  Speaker 2: crying and a lot of contact high.
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: And we are just... So sorry.
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: Right-wing media, that we in New York City couldn't live
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: up to your definition of a peaceful gathering.
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: Now, that's how you behave in public. Although, to be
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: fair to that mob, you know, they lost. So... Anger justifiable.
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: But I guess it's all about what side of the
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: aisle you sit on. Where you see a mob destroying
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: a school bus, I see people of all faiths and
• 13:49
  Speaker 2: creeds and colors and sexualities coming together to destroy a
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: school bus. It ain't a melting pot until you light
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: that bitch on fire. So, right-wing media, you cannot tear
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: us apart. Our mayor is Muslim. Our bagels are Jewish.
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: Our Timothée' s Chalamet. Nixon 5.
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: But, you know, honestly, look, man, some shit happened that
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: wasn't great. The night was marred by some violence. I mean,
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: what would you guys on the right rather be watching?
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: The White House is getting ready to rumble with UFC.
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: Very excited to see this. Epic, epic day. Hey, isn't
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: that awesome? Fight night.
• 14:51
  Speaker 2: I'm actually personally looking forward to it very, very much.
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: I have a ticket. Plus one. My brother. Gotta tell you,
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: I'm pumped.
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: I feel like my life is gonna change this weekend.
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: Is that guy trying to his brother? What? I don't
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: know what's going on here.
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: I'm going to take my brown neck. They're probably going
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: to be holding on, which I.
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: Don't know what's going on.
• 15:26
  Speaker 2: You didn't care for New York's joyful night marred by
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: a small amount of violence because it wasn't focused enough
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: on the violence part? Yes, Sunday night gave the president
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: and his acolytes an opportunity to rebut the joyous communion
• 15:44
  Speaker 2: of teamwork that embodied the New York Knickerbockers for a
• 15:47
  Speaker 2: joyless Vegas-style trudge through the people's house now transformed into
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: a gold-plated pummeling center where the gladiator's god was praised
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: for his forbearance and, of course, nutsack.
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: Shout out to Trump for having the balls to put
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: some shit like this on.
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: And if you were at home watching this thinking to yourself,
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: is this a parody?
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: Are they filming idiocracy?
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: Next thing you know, they will be branding the cutaways
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: to our country's commander-in-chief.
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: I gotta thank President Trump for making this happen. This
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: is unbelievable.
• 16:25
  Speaker 2: It takes such a special person to be able to
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: have the balls to do something like this, and I
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: have so much respect for him. Monster energy drink?
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: Is that really cool? Are we now just taunting the
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: old man? Pretty late night, Mr. President. Getting sleepy. Got
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: an early negotiation in the morning.
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: I bet you're not man enough to throw down a red, white,
• 16:56
  Speaker 2: and blue raspberry snazzler.
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: Come on, bitch. Snazzle your taint off.
• 17:10
  Speaker 2: What a god-awful mockery of an event that somehow managed
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: to find a way to devalue both combat sports and
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: our national dignity. Who even aired this embarrassing shit? The
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: event aired on Paramount +. And what a fine event
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: it was. Once again, the leaders of Paramount Plus providing
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: us all with incredible content at reasonable prices. I am
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: proud to stand. with the Paramount family and whatever shows
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: they decide to either cancel or put on.
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: And lastly, Michelle Obama is a man. Am I right, America?
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: My God, what a asshole. You know what?
• 18:43
  Speaker 2: I look forward to his performance on next week's Comics Unleashed.
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: I'll let myself out.
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: And by the way, if you thought this entire spectacle
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: was inappropriate for something that takes place in the peripheral
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: vision of Lincoln, well, that's a you problem. Something that
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: middle America, the average American, could connect with. It's coming
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: back to a sense of, like, we don't need the
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: snobby elites anymore pretending they're too good for us. Yeah,
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: you know, the average American, they don't want their White
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: House to stand for certain morals and values. The regular
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: people in this country want their president to live in
• 19:28
  Speaker 2: a slightly more violent Hooters. Or a slightly less violent
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: Waffle House. But somehow, those of us who live in
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: the shithole parts of the country are the ones looking
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: down on you?
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: They'll probably be having like a pride show or something
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: for 200 years. with, you know, half-naked men. Did you
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: even watch? Did you even watch? Did you watch? God,
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: I'm so tired of this.
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: You guys always trying to draw a distinction between the
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: real America of the heartland.
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: And the elites in the big city, but it's never
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: been true.
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: If being a real American means sacrificing and working your
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: ass off to try and achieve the dream of a
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: better life for your children, no Americans are more real
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: than New Yorkers.
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: None of them.
• 20:31
  Speaker 2: We have eight and a half million people here. There
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: are probably more hardworking American value individuals in the liberal
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: hellhole of New York City than exist in the entire
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: states of Wyoming, Idaho, and Mississippi combined. And yes, maybe
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: 2% to 3% of those people are Spider-Men, but still.
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: Most New Yorkers don't go to the Met Gala. And
• 21:07
  Speaker 2: trust me, there are elites in the heartland, too. I
• 21:11
  Speaker 2: know for a fact Tulsa is ruled by kings. New
• 21:19
  Speaker 2: York's a hard place to live, man. It's a hard
• 21:23
  Speaker 2: city to live in. There's 100 different nationalities in a
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: two-block radius. 10 pounds of people in a five-pound bag.
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: And it's one of those bags that people should really
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: use to clean up after their dogs, but they don't.
• 21:34
  Speaker 1: They sometimes don't.
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: But that's why weekends like the one we just had
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: are all the more magical, where you feel the joy
• 21:45
  Speaker 2: and striving and hope and, let's face it, aroma of
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: the people that you live really too close to. The
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: real division in America isn't between cities and rural areas
• 21:58
  Speaker 2: or suburbs or heartland values and coastal elites or liberals
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: and conservatives. It's between people anywhere who find joy in
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: community versus those who seem to only find it in fealty.
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: And I know which America I want to occasionally step
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: in dog shit in.