Latest / After Maghrib 🌙 / Shia-Sunni Relationship Disaster

Transcript

Shia-Sunni Relationship Disaster · After Maghrib 🌙

• 0:00
  Do you know, I've seen like, loads of podcasts do dilemmas.
• 0:03
  Yeah, I've seen like, like podcasts talk about dilemmas,
• 0:07
  issues and that kind of thing. And I've realized, like, we see
• 0:10
  so many of these. Do you know I mean on Twitter?
• 0:13
  Although, you know, I love dilemmas.
• 0:14
  You know why? Because I feel like the proper
• 0:16
  real life where because it's all online.
• 0:19
  So like someone goes on Reddit or something, they post what
• 0:22
  they're struggling with, knowing that either firstly, they're
• 0:25
  anonymous and they can actually be comfortable themselves that
• 0:30
  they can't go to, you know, talk to their family member, for
• 0:32
  example, what's a scholar or not?
• 0:34
  They put it online and they see what the community says.
• 0:37
  Slick, let's. Do it today, Let's do it today.
• 0:40
  It's crazy. There's a whole shit, I read it
• 0:42
  that I've been going through. Shit, I read it, Yeah.
• 0:47
  Is it like a Shia page? This is reddit.com/shia Reddit
• 0:52
  dot. Com forward slash Shia.
• 0:55
  I think we need to start. These are aftermath of Reddit
• 0:58
  page. Yeah.
• 0:59
  Does that work? You can you can make your own.
• 1:01
  Page. I'll be sick.
• 1:02
  Imagine taking the conversation online.
• 1:05
  Sick late night buzz. Anyway, guys, some alaikum.
• 1:09
  Welcome back to the After Market podcast.
• 1:11
  Today we want to talk about dilemmas, which I'm sure you've
• 1:14
  probably gathered by now. So it's not close up on you, by
• 1:17
  the way, it's a wide shot. Minor bro.
• 1:19
  You sure? Why?
• 1:20
  What's the bro? What's the big deal?
• 1:22
  I like the fact that you're here.
• 1:37
  How's it going? How are you?
• 1:45
  Yeah, man's chilling. I think before we get into the
• 1:53
  poll, obviously just following on from last week for those who
• 1:55
  haven't listened, obviously we are continuing to talk about the
• 1:57
  escalation of the situation in Lebanon and Gaza specifically,
• 2:01
  of course, as well. And I think we are nearly at the
• 2:04
  end of Jummah Knights as well. And the last five episodes of
• 2:08
  Jummah Knights are conversations with scholars on and not just
• 2:11
  scholars, but people who are experts in their field, in the
• 2:14
  community. So check out Jummah Knights as
• 2:16
  well before Muhammad Ali calls it a day, but he's going to be
• 2:20
  back. So he's not going anywhere, but
• 2:22
  we're going to kind of take a pause, but I'll leave that to
• 2:25
  him to explain. Fair.
• 2:27
  Enough. That's the dilemma I'm facing.
• 2:30
  What's going to happen to Muhammad Ali?
• 2:32
  You know what I mean? We're getting too used to him.
• 2:34
  We're getting to use them a lot. That's going to happen to
• 2:37
  Muhammad. Ali is on Shah Allah.
• 2:39
  He will have the opportunity to meet Amir Almoud.
• 2:42
  I knew you were going to say that.
• 2:43
  I thought we were going to say drink from the pool of culture.
• 2:46
  I was disappointed. I was coming to that.
• 2:49
  My Allah, bless him and protect him.
• 2:52
  You know, he's actually so good at what he does.
• 2:55
  I'm leaving. I'm not even joking that there's
• 2:57
  certain topics. I'm not bothered to listen to
• 2:59
  Ahmed, but if it's being discussed on Jummah nights, I
• 3:03
  put it on on the way to work or after work on the commute back
• 3:05
  home and I've learned something new.
• 3:08
  It's amazing. It's amazing.
• 3:09
  I've told him because obviously we like cherry picked him when
• 3:13
  Jummah nights started and I told him I said I've my interest in
• 3:17
  Quran and Hadith has exponentially risen thanks to
• 3:21
  you in many ways and thanks to thanks to you and him.
• 3:25
  Of course, since Jeremiah Knights as well, he's gone into
• 3:27
  so much depth on a lot of our foundational ID kind of stuff,
• 3:31
  which has been amazing. So check out guys, make sure you
• 3:33
  don't miss out most of our somebody.
• 3:36
  Oh, go on, do. You have a microphone.
• 3:37
  Today, yeah, it's plugged in. So hit us bro, let's go through
• 3:42
  I'm. Just trying to see what to start
• 3:44
  with because some of them are a bit deep.
• 3:46
  OK, so I wanted to start with something lighthearted but I
• 3:51
  can't find anything something. So tell me, tell.
• 3:53
  Me pick one randomly. I've got I know you said the
• 3:58
  other day that your daughter, if you don't mind me saying, came
• 4:02
  home from school and said that Jesus Christ is the Son of God.
• 4:08
  Do you remember you told me that?
• 4:10
  How did you deal with that? How did how did you as a father
• 4:14
  deal with? That, and not only that, she's
• 4:16
  tried to fight him about it. Genuinely.
• 4:20
  Yeah. So this was, well, two weeks
• 4:24
  ago, picked her up from school and on the way home in the car,
• 4:30
  she was like, you know, Father, Jesus is the son of God.
• 4:36
  How we have Prophet Muhammad, the messenger of God.
• 4:40
  Jesus is the son of God. So this was something they were
• 4:44
  teaching her at school. It's not something I'm against.
• 4:48
  Religion. So you believe Jesus Christ?
• 4:50
  As no, no, as in religious education at school, because I
• 4:53
  think it opens you up to other beliefs.
• 4:55
  And I think it's very important living here in the West, that we
• 4:58
  are aware of our neighbours, aware of our colleagues, their
• 5:00
  beliefs, their opinions, right? Though we don't agree with 99%
• 5:06
  of them. We have our own Hamdullah, our
• 5:07
  own Torhade, our own, our faith and all that.
• 5:10
  But it's important to understand what others believe in, in terms
• 5:14
  of their faith. And I told her very simply, I
• 5:17
  was like, Jesus for us is Isaiah Salaam.
• 5:23
  They think he's the son of God, whereas Islam is the true
• 5:28
  religion. And the truth is he's the
• 5:31
  messenger of God. He's the prophet of Allah,
• 5:33
  right? And it was only on that level
• 5:36
  and she understood does. It frighten you.
• 5:40
  It doesn't frighten me because Insha'allah, I believe that I
• 5:44
  can hopefully give them the right upbringing in terms of
• 5:51
  belief and things. So I'll handle I I am I worried?
• 5:54
  No, I'm not worried. I'm more worried.
• 5:56
  I'm more worried about the rainbow Mafia.
• 5:58
  Yeah, Yeah, than other religions.
• 6:00
  So it's because obviously it's part of a bigger conversation on
• 6:03
  like the hedgerow that a lot of people are doing to the Middle
• 6:06
  East now. Like bro, I've in the last two
• 6:09
  months and in the next two months.
• 6:11
  I've by the way, every time someone says hijra I keep
• 6:13
  thinking of Rasul Allah. Like the whole migration, The
• 6:20
  migration, No, but of course people are leaving and going.
• 6:23
  Like I was saying, I've got so many friends.
• 6:25
  Like not just friends. Really.
• 6:26
  Really. Yeah, really good friends who
• 6:28
  have come and gone. Not come, but gone.
• 6:31
  And we obviously saw a brother like a few weeks ago, came here.
• 6:34
  He was the first in the recent years or one of the 1st in
• 6:37
  recent years to move to Oman. And a lot of people are going.
• 6:40
  But I think a big part, I spoke to a friend today on the phone
• 6:42
  who I found out is moving and he's moving in, in the next week
• 6:45
  or so. And he told me that I want to, I
• 6:49
  want to go and just make sure my kids are good, like our
• 6:53
  responsibility. And I think part of the reason
• 6:55
  is these conversations. I don't think religious
• 6:57
  education is a threat. I, I agree with you.
• 6:59
  I went to a very Christian School, a really cute Christian
• 7:03
  School. We sung hymns in class.
• 7:08
  Do you know what I mean? Like very, very, very Christian
• 7:11
  as it gets. But I think I kind of felt proud
• 7:15
  being the only Muslim in my class at that time because.
• 7:19
  I was only a Muslim. Yeah, yeah, there was times when
• 7:21
  I was the only Muslim. Class was a Muslim.
• 7:23
  Really. Yeah, yeah, I went to like a
• 7:25
  predominantly white Christian School, like for a period where
• 7:29
  the religious education was strong and at times I'd have one
• 7:32
  or two other Muslims, but majority our class are like 25.
• 7:36
  It was like 18 Christians, 5 Jews, 5 Hindus, one or two
• 7:39
  Muslims. You know, what's interesting by,
• 7:42
  by, by, Sorry to interject, Ahmed, but what's interesting
• 7:45
  about religious education, if I go back to my primary school
• 7:48
  years, was that I was never taught that there is no God.
• 7:52
  I was never taught that. I don't remember everyone
• 7:54
  telling me that the atheists exist.
• 7:56
  So I knew everyone believed in a creator.
• 7:58
  Everyone believed in a divine source of power or something.
• 8:02
  But we didn't have this fear of, you know.
• 8:04
  What we was there to teach, I, I don't want to say like that, but
• 8:07
  like I remember learning about Sikhism, Judaism.
• 8:10
  Yeah, Jainism. Hinduism, all, all of it.
• 8:13
  And then denominations, Protestants, Catholics, you
• 8:16
  know. You know what?
• 8:18
  You know I was. I don't.
• 8:19
  How old would I be in primary school?
• 8:21
  I think. Up to 11.
• 8:23
  Probably, I think, yeah, three and four, although with year six
• 8:26
  that we had religious education right during that time when they
• 8:30
  used to mention like for example, the the pillars of
• 8:32
  Islam, the five pillars of what makes you Muslim at that age, I
• 8:36
  knew this is incorrect. Yeah, I mean because they would
• 8:39
  have followed the Sunni. Yes, yes.
• 8:41
  But things are changing now, you know that.
• 8:43
  You know why? The curriculum, we're going to
• 8:46
  mention it. Not by name, but I knew there
• 8:48
  was a. Project brother Zamir has
• 8:49
  made-up him Zamir Hussain he's been like a key, key, key figure
• 8:53
  in advancing and progressing the curriculum in the UK when it
• 8:57
  comes to Shia education and and the representation of Shia a
• 9:01
  guide in schools that's taught. So previously it would have been
• 9:07
  Islam is and then the five Asuna Deen of Asuna Wajahara and then
• 9:11
  there would be a paragraph on the Shia and be like, yeah,
• 9:13
  these guys, they mourn for Karbala and this and that.
• 9:16
  Yes, that's it. Where in reality the of course.
• 9:22
  Reality. We are Islam, but yeah.
• 9:24
  Like there's so many similarities, of course, when it
• 9:27
  comes to the wide Jibat and so on and so forth.
• 9:30
  But beyond that, you know, you know, like the understanding of
• 9:35
  Dorid is different. Mahad Kayama is different.
• 9:38
  What happens after death of Raja Imama?
• 9:42
  You know, even in terms of muster habba to what what's how
• 9:46
  you do your akam and your filk. You know how a proper cliche?
• 9:50
  Ah bro. You'll get a proper cliche of
• 9:51
  your discussion. Should we jump in?
• 9:53
  Yeah, let's jump in. Let's jump in.
• 9:54
  I was enjoying this question. I'll be very well.
• 9:56
  Let's go, let's go. Because I was even going to
• 9:58
  discuss they at my age, they discussed like, us going to
• 10:03
  pilgrimage to Hajj. Yeah, I used to think, you know,
• 10:06
  it's not just that, like, that's Karbala, you know?
• 10:10
  But anyway, yeah, back to you. The first one I'm going to, it's
• 10:17
  a bit deep to be honest, but we'll see what you guys think it
• 10:20
  goes. I'm in love with a Sunni girl so
• 10:23
  I don't think I've ever been depressed in my life as I
• 10:25
  currently AM. I'm currently engaged and to be
• 10:28
  married to a Shia woman but I'm in love with a Sunni woman.
• 10:32
  I know this looks like a high school crushed type situation
• 10:34
  but no dude this is killing me. I don't know what to do since I
• 10:38
  want to marry both of them. What?
• 10:40
  I hate myself but I cannot change this.
• 10:42
  I need help. I'm going to talk to my aunt who
• 10:44
  is very close who's very close with me and see what she says
• 10:48
  about the situation. I think the right thing to do is
• 10:51
  to marry a Shia woman and forget about the other one, but this
• 10:54
  ain't easy. I literally dream about her.
• 10:57
  The worst part is that lately I've been neglecting my
• 10:59
  religion, barely praying and not doing much for the sake of
• 11:01
  Allah. What advice can you give me?
• 11:05
  Where to begin? When mentioning him has no end.
• 11:11
  What? What?
• 11:12
  What do you think the right decision to make is?
• 11:14
  I don't think it's as black, as white as that.
• 11:17
  I think there's like layers to it, yeah.
• 11:20
  Wait, I I just want to break it down just so that the main core
• 11:23
  points I've understood. OK, He's a Shiite brother.
• 11:26
  Yeah. He's in love with the Sunni
• 11:28
  girl. He's engaged to a Shiite woman.
• 11:32
  So. So.
• 11:32
  He's engaged, but he's he doesn't want to take that step
• 11:35
  because he knows he's in love with a sunny woman, right?
• 11:38
  OK, OK, fine. And he's he's lacking in his
• 11:40
  spirituality and he wants to talk to his family member,
• 11:43
  right? He's and he acknowledges the
• 11:45
  fact that he thinks the right thing to do is to manage.
• 11:47
  OK, cool. So like the ladies to this are
• 11:49
  firstly, in my opinion, like the lack of spirituality is core to
• 11:54
  all of it. Of course, to all of it.
• 11:56
  You know he's saying he's not praying said what's what's your
• 11:59
  favorite verse about the Salah in the Holy Quran, Fahashi Well
• 12:04
  Munkar, that Salah is I said like Salah will keep away the.
• 12:12
  The bad, even and ugly. I said yeah, and your desires,
• 12:15
  your illegitimate desires. So if you're if you're not
• 12:18
  praying, you're susceptible to these sorts of temptations.
• 12:21
  And that's like a core thing. So these will all alleviate and
• 12:24
  get easier with your connection to our last panel to other.
• 12:27
  And we always say, we've said it before the podcast, marriage is
• 12:30
  a triangle and a last panel to others at the top.
• 12:32
  So as long as you've focus your your relationship with Allah,
• 12:35
  your marriage will get easier. So trust in God, have Tawakkol,
• 12:39
  in my opinion, marry the Shia sister, as long as that she's,
• 12:41
  you know, herself as righteous and she's.
• 12:45
  Can I can I tell you what the top comment is on this?
• 12:47
  Go on bro. Go on.
• 12:48
  Because I advise you to not marry the Shia woman if you do
• 12:51
  not truly love her. That would just be unjust
• 12:53
  towards her. Which is fair.
• 12:55
  I can. I don't disagree I.
• 12:56
  Can understand it. We don't have context though, so
• 12:58
  we don't know how it feels like it may have been arranged or it
• 13:01
  may not have been. Yeah, but say he say he loves
• 13:03
  the Shia woman but he still has feelings bro, if he.
• 13:05
  Doesn't marry, he's susceptible to do Haram with assistant.
• 13:09
  Yeah, he's not married to. Yeah, but is it, is it then fair
• 13:11
  to the Shia wife 100% that he's not going to care about her at
• 13:15
  all? 100% I think he has to be honest
• 13:18
  with himself and needs to figure out his future.
• 13:21
  If he says I'm in love lovers, they say what love is blind
• 13:25
  right? So you you don't see the day
• 13:29
  after tomorrow, let alone 10 years down the line, right?
• 13:32
  So I think you have to put emotion aside and use the
• 13:35
  intellect a lost panel what I like gave you and make that
• 13:38
  right decision. And if you ask me, if you're
• 13:41
  Shia only makes sense to marry within your own true.
• 13:46
  OK, the true belief, I mean, because when I say you think
• 13:49
  long term, you have to think what happens down the line when
• 13:51
  you have children. Yeah.
• 13:53
  And that's something very important, very critical.
• 13:55
  And, you know, we see, I'm not saying Sunni marriages or Shia
• 13:58
  marriages don't work. Are they preferable?
• 14:01
  A. Circumstance.
• 14:02
  Go speak to inshallah your learner, you know more learners
• 14:06
  in your community, they can give you the better advice than I
• 14:08
  can. But why I would say genuinely is
• 14:11
  that from stories I've seen, stories I've heard, even some
• 14:16
  people coming out later on down the line saying I've made the
• 14:20
  the biggest decision in my life without any considering the long
• 14:24
  term impact it has on the family relationship, right?
• 14:27
  Bear in mind you're going to have to raise so many kids
• 14:29
  possibly. I sent so then what happens
• 14:32
  then? Bro that's let me just tell you.
• 14:34
  What discussing dilemmas that is a huge dilemma do.
• 14:37
  You know, let me let me tell you, I had AI had one of my boys
• 14:41
  maybe like 5 or 6 years ago tell me he was in the same situation.
• 14:44
  Well, not the same. He wasn't engaged to a shit I
• 14:46
  go, but he was like I'm in love with a Sony sister.
• 14:49
  I want to marry her. He goes.
• 14:51
  I don't think it's the right thing, but I really want to and
• 14:54
  I want to ask you what you think all I said to him, I said, bro,
• 14:57
  you're a cordial, which means what that like five generations
• 15:02
  up. Listen to this bro.
• 15:04
  We are from a community whose lineage well, Mushrakim.
• 15:09
  Yeah. We embraced Allah.
• 15:11
  I'm. Serious.
• 15:14
  Bro why jeopardize that man like we've been given a gift as in
• 15:20
  terms of my own little tribe 300,000 all around the world.
• 15:23
  OK, biggest name on earth bro. A couple 100 years ago, our
• 15:28
  community were were Hindus. We are now.
• 15:31
  Muslim. Not even Muslims, we are Shia.
• 15:34
  Why jeopardize that? And then on your payama 5
• 15:37
  generations down, you might have a Salafi great grandchild or
• 15:40
  something Allah says to you like look what you threw away man.
• 15:43
  And I'm not saying like you said disclaimer.
• 15:46
  That's not, I'm not saying that's a guaranteed or even a
• 15:49
  likelihood, but. She might become Shia, you don't
• 15:52
  know, right? And even then, like you can
• 15:54
  marry any Shia sister and a Shia sister can marry any Shia
• 15:57
  brother and this thing's out of our control.
• 15:59
  But my point being is that when you enter marriage, things
• 16:02
  become very serious. You want to minimise the the
• 16:05
  risk and minimise the chance of jeopardising your marriage and
• 16:10
  your future and your lineage. So and, and we see people within
• 16:14
  our community who are from different cultures, different
• 16:16
  countries, follow different Monaja and struggle sometimes.
• 16:19
  And I'm not saying that's right or like wrong, but what I am
• 16:24
  saying is that the more variables you have, the more
• 16:27
  difficult becomes, specifically when it comes to things like
• 16:30
  core belief. Because at 25202530 years old,
• 16:34
  you may be really infatuated and lustful about someone.
• 16:38
  Like you said, love is blind. But when you're 45 and 65 and
• 16:42
  you know, you're getting old and you want to give back to the
• 16:44
  community and you're talking about doing a will and you have
• 16:46
  a different common wills and you want to talk about naming your
• 16:49
  kids and one wants to call it one name and one was to call it
• 16:53
  something else. You know, you've got two
• 16:55
  different opinions. These are things which are are
• 16:57
  going to happen. Do you know what I mean?
• 16:58
  You can't just ignore the realities.
• 17:01
  So the one who said don't marry the Shia, I think that's not a a
• 17:05
  bad thing to say as in the top comment, because it's it's also
• 17:08
  about not doing an injustice. But look, if if anyone says
• 17:11
  marry the one you love, I disagree with that personally.
• 17:14
  Awesome, awesome. Should move on.
• 17:16
  We're going to be done. The the next one is actually
• 17:19
  targeting, said Ali. Me.
• 17:21
  Oof. Yeah, but I'm not going to read
• 17:23
  that. I'm going to save it after this.
• 17:25
  I'm going to save it for after. After what targeted me?
• 17:28
  It's literally about you. What?
• 17:29
  The hell. OK, no way.
• 17:31
  I serious. Let's do it.
• 17:33
  Let's do it. Let's do it.
• 17:34
  Do. You want to go ahead.
• 17:35
  No, the one after do the one after.
• 17:37
  We'll save it. That's suspense.
• 17:39
  That's scary. What the hell?
• 17:41
  So this one says no, not this one.
• 17:45
  My sister has gone astray. Salaam Alaikum, my 18 year old
• 17:48
  sister has gone astray. I have caught her talking to a
• 17:51
  boy inappropriate late at night on her phone.
• 17:54
  This is the second time I'm not sure what to do.
• 17:57
  She has bad friends and influencers who influence her in
• 17:59
  a bad way and uses apps such as TikTok and Instagram.
• 18:03
  I've logged into these tons of times and she has saved videos
• 18:05
  that talk about relationship and boys.
• 18:08
  She's starting university in two weeks and I'm worried she will
• 18:11
  meet up with these boys. She keeps to herself to the
• 18:14
  point where she always sits alone at home without parents.
• 18:20
  She lacks respect for older siblings.
• 18:22
  Her knowledge of Islam is very weak.
• 18:23
  What can I do to help her? Are there any things I should?
• 18:26
  Feel bad? Well, tell her to watch.
• 18:28
  We've had a similar dilemma to this in the past.
• 18:30
  Do you remember about a sister who went away, ran away?
• 18:33
  Do you remember? You have us.
• 18:36
  Who Who ran away? We had a dilemma like this,
• 18:38
  right? Similar dilemma.
• 18:39
  Yeah. Wishawa, did you say that her
• 18:43
  brother said that she doesn't have parents?
• 18:45
  No, no, the sentence doesn't really make sense.
• 18:47
  It says she always sits alone, even at home with our parents.
• 18:51
  OK. Basically, when the parents are
• 18:54
  there, she doesn't sit with them.
• 18:55
  Yeah, for someone who has, you know, us guys, we have this
• 19:05
  God-given Lira, right? And God help you firstly to know
• 19:12
  my sister's gone through this and you want a good outcome for
• 19:16
  her, right? I just, I generally don't know
• 19:19
  where to begin because I don't know if you should be the one
• 19:25
  responsible because it really matters like this.
• 19:31
  It should be the welly, which is how welly, which is her father
• 19:34
  if he's still alive. So, but I don't know why the
• 19:37
  parents don't know about this. I'm not going to go say go tell
• 19:40
  the parents, but I think somehow her father needs to get involved
• 19:44
  in having a serious conversation, perhaps with his
• 19:48
  knowledge and your your father advises you what to tell her,
• 19:51
  you know, so build that trust relationship with the girl to
• 19:55
  guide her to that path. Otherwise, I genuinely don't
• 19:57
  know what to say because if the parents find out, they can even
• 20:01
  make or break that family relationship and mar of the fact
• 20:06
  that the fact that you know, I'm not sure if he said.
• 20:10
  With her permission, but from my understood he's spying on her
• 20:12
  phone, right? Or.
• 20:15
  Yeah, yeah. Yeah, which is the stuff like
• 20:17
  she's reposting on TikTok or? Maybe, maybe I mean it was
• 20:21
  public knowledge, the. Point being is he's he's found
• 20:24
  out his sister or she's found out her sister is doing this
• 20:28
  stuff, Yeah. I think talk to her, talk to
• 20:31
  her, but don't I? I wouldn't say give her any
• 20:34
  advice. I think you have to leave that
• 20:35
  too, your father. So the you talk to her in terms
• 20:39
  of open up, opening up a conversation and say what you're
• 20:43
  doing is wrong. Let's let's work on this right?
• 20:46
  Not telling her off. This is the problem.
• 20:47
  I think a lot of times we shut down our our teenage youth, our,
• 20:53
  you know, youngsters growing up becoming adults in the 21st
• 20:56
  century here in the modern world, especially living in the
• 20:58
  West, is that all we want to do is tell them off for what
• 21:00
  they're doing is wrong when they're surrounded by everyone
• 21:02
  telling them this is the path to take or this is what is the
• 21:05
  relationship or this is what is normal in any society, right.
• 21:09
  So I think don't be angry first, don't have a vision of your
• 21:17
  sister as someone who's negative.
• 21:19
  That's incorrect. What she's doing is Haram,
• 21:21
  definitely, but let's make that Haram to something halal.
• 21:25
  And there was a very similar dilemma that was bought up on
• 21:32
  the pulpit by a very big speaker in Iraq where he was like, look,
• 21:37
  and the the issue was, wasn't her brother.
• 21:39
  The issue was the father. He was, he was like, I found out
• 21:42
  my daughter speaks to this guy and she's been speaking to him
• 21:48
  for months. And I know they are in love.
• 21:52
  I don't like the guy. So the say goes, I I told the
• 21:56
  guy you know what they're doing is Haram.
• 21:59
  Well, as her father, you have to make it right if if they want to
• 22:02
  marry each other. The reason why she hasn't told
• 22:05
  you is maybe you have said you either have to marry your cousin
• 22:09
  or either I'm going to choose for you and that's why she
• 22:11
  hasn't told you. And the fact that she's in the
• 22:13
  Haram conversation is only via socials is perhaps you've put
• 22:19
  pressure on her that you can't come and tell me there's this
• 22:22
  guy that I want and he goes, look, if there is something
• 22:24
  that's happening that's wrong, there's no Haram in making
• 22:27
  halal, right? You all get at that.
• 22:29
  Point I remember in college, there was this guy that out of
• 22:32
  nowhere, one day, the next day he had a wedding.
• 22:36
  Yeah. So what what had happened is he
• 22:38
  was speaking to a girl, and the girl's dad must have found out
• 22:41
  these two are speaking. So the father must have forced
• 22:44
  them to get married the next day.
• 22:46
  Otherwise, these two are never going to see each other again.
• 22:48
  Do you know? If they're so married.
• 22:50
  I have no. Idea this was like, that's
• 22:52
  amazing. Because I was thinking when I
• 22:53
  had this that marriage is 1 angle, but I don't want people
• 22:57
  at home to think. Like, no, obviously.
• 22:59
  So the the top comment here is saying there's nothing you can
• 23:02
  do immediately to fix this. Yeah, I'll paraphrase because
• 23:06
  it's a bit long, but he he's saying like you should build a
• 23:08
  relationship with this person over a long term and and try to
• 23:13
  like influence them to do the better the right things.
• 23:15
  This is exactly what my my first initial thought was.
• 23:19
  Firstly, that there's like a few bullet points in my mind First
• 23:22
  is that like it's not a unique situation.
• 23:25
  It happens a lot. I think I was I was, if I'm
• 23:27
  going to be really honest, I was like that that kid.
• 23:31
  Do you know what I mean? Where I was talking to to girls
• 23:34
  and I was had said there like having bad friends and in bad
• 23:38
  communities and about to go off into university.
• 23:41
  And I think I was like that. If I'm going to be really real
• 23:44
  with you, probably at a younger age than 18, but for me, biggest
• 23:50
  change or the biggest turning point was my circle, my friend's
• 23:53
  circle. And I have to give credit to AB
• 23:57
  Sox for me because I feel like the AB Sox for me pulled me back
• 24:01
  into reality and into faith. Shouts out the AB Sox.
• 24:04
  We shout. AB Sox, we love them, but like
• 24:08
  on a level like I feel like that really helped me.
• 24:10
  And obviously I wasn't perfect and so I'm not, but that helps.
• 24:12
  That's like the first thing. It happens to a lot of us.
• 24:15
  It happens to a lot of youth. Second thing is the parents,
• 24:18
  like you mentioned the welly as the father, but obviously
• 24:21
  there's, there's a nature and a nurture angle to this.
• 24:24
  So the way you've raised your children plays a massive,
• 24:27
  massive role. And I mean that.
• 24:30
  And now I'm seeing that as a father of young children.
• 24:33
  And I, I noticed when I say a word or the way I say a word, I
• 24:38
  will be imitated by my son. So this is picked up on by kids
• 24:43
  from a young age to 18, and at that age of 18 you want
• 24:46
  validation, you want independence, you want
• 24:48
  liberation. So you will search for it
• 24:50
  however you can get. A nail on the head.
• 24:52
  Yeah, sorry about that. Yeah.
• 24:53
  Like, do you hit you? You search for that validation
• 24:56
  and then you turn to social media.
• 24:57
  Social media is an outlet where you're allowed to express your
• 25:00
  feelings. You can repost.
• 25:01
  And the repost button is more than just clicking a button for
• 25:03
  an 18 year old. The repost button is, is saying
• 25:06
  I endorse and I, I feel empowered by this message, so I
• 25:09
  will share it to my community. And that's the first time in a
• 25:12
  child's life that they have the ability to do that.
• 25:16
  So although they're 18 and they may be an adult Islamically and
• 25:20
  even in a Western sense, but in a grand scheme of things, when
• 25:23
  it comes to the real world, they're inexperienced and
• 25:26
  they're still children. They still live with their
• 25:28
  parents. They're uneducated from like a,
• 25:30
  you know, perspective of Western academics.
• 25:32
  And they're also not independent, so they are looking
• 25:36
  for independence. So yes, there's a hormonal,
• 25:38
  there's a biological element to it.
• 25:40
  There's a there's a need for a search, a yearning for finding
• 25:43
  oneself and a self identification process that you
• 25:46
  go through when you speak to the opposite gender.
• 25:49
  But a big part of it is needing to feel recognized and
• 25:53
  independent. You can still do that when you
• 25:56
  leave your home. You need a good circle of
• 25:58
  friends. You need a good community.
• 26:00
  Unfortunately for the sibling, the oldest sibling, like the
• 26:03
  comments said, there's nothing you can do right now.
• 26:04
  Your sister or your brother. Your sister's going away in two
• 26:07
  weeks time to university. All you can do is be the best
• 26:10
  sibling. You can the best.
• 26:12
  Be in touch with them constantly, but don't put them
• 26:15
  off. But they love you.
• 26:16
  So you can be in touch with them.
• 26:18
  No matter who they are, how they change, as long as you're not
• 26:20
  like difficult with them, they're still going to love you.
• 26:24
  Be there, be present, include them, make them inclusive in the
• 26:27
  family, you know, do things as families activities, take them
• 26:31
  to events, introduce them to people.
• 26:33
  As they become 20212325 years old, they mature and their
• 26:38
  interests will change. Their interest in boys will
• 26:41
  change their interest in, you know, the need.
• 26:44
  The search for popularity will will mature.
• 26:46
  Do you see what I mean? I know I'm giving like a long
• 26:48
  winded perspective, but I really I.
• 26:50
  No, I think you had to because you, you've, you've made, you've
• 26:54
  actually made me remember something very important as
• 26:58
  fathers, right? And part of the dilemma is that
• 27:03
  she's sitting in the same room as the parents, but she's
• 27:06
  sitting alone, right? And I and I and I think as
• 27:09
  parents and to all the parents out there, you have to have a
• 27:13
  unique bond with your children and as fathers, especially with
• 27:16
  your daughters, because there are fathers who don't care about
• 27:21
  their daughters growing up. They'll care later.
• 27:24
  The day she goes on to get married, I'll find you the man,
• 27:27
  right? But where were you when they
• 27:28
  were growing up? And the point I'm trying to make
• 27:30
  is that when she's a teenager, when she turns, I don't know,
• 27:34
  13141516, she may fall in love. And people search for love,
• 27:42
  right? And I think as fathers, if you
• 27:44
  don't give enough love to your daughters, they might fall in
• 27:49
  love with someone else. You know how many people say
• 27:51
  that they were in love in their teenage years and then when they
• 27:53
  grow up, they're like, that's not tough, bro.
• 27:55
  That's infatuation. Yeah, that's that's, that's
• 27:58
  being recognized. Because if a father doesn't tell
• 28:00
  his daughter I love you. Maybe not every day, but you
• 28:04
  know the most basic words. I love you.
• 28:06
  You know I love my daughter. I love you so I don't know what
• 28:09
  your daughters name is. Just tell her I love you
• 28:11
  because. You're right.
• 28:12
  If she's never heard a man from her family tell her I love you
• 28:16
  when she was 131415 someone going to you know what I love
• 28:19
  you, she's gonna fall in love. And why?
• 28:20
  Because she is feeling like I am the most important person.
• 28:25
  In someone. 'S life.
• 28:26
  And I need a man to tell me that like, they're going to look for
• 28:29
  that male love elsewhere. You know how I realized that?
• 28:32
  Like my daughter, I love her to biz.
• 28:34
  She's one year old. She's like, literally, she's a
• 28:37
  year old. OK, bro.
• 28:39
  My daughter, she like, she can spend all day surrounded by
• 28:44
  ladies, yeah, getting love and hugs and kisses.
• 28:47
  But when she sees me, it's different.
• 28:49
  You're different because obviously you've got 2 girls.
• 28:51
  You'll know that feeling, right? So like there's something like
• 28:54
  very unique with a father daughter love.
• 28:57
  And the way women see men as they grow up is heavily
• 29:02
  conditioned by the relationship they have with their father.
• 29:05
  You know, the, the, the level of, of caregiving they have with
• 29:07
  their father, the level of reciprocal love they get from
• 29:11
  their father. And I think a father's
• 29:13
  responsibility is to teach a woman, teach a daughter how a
• 29:16
  man should be. You teach your daughter about
• 29:19
  masculinity. That's a dad's role.
• 29:21
  You know what I mean? I love that.
• 29:22
  I love it's. True, bro.
• 29:23
  Like as a father, you're meant to teach your your daughter what
• 29:25
  a man is. You're meant to teach them what
• 29:28
  a good male role model is. A caretaker is.
• 29:32
  Yella, let's move on. Yella.
• 29:35
  What should we go? Tonight, Coffee.
• 29:36
  Coffee. Teenage drama.
• 29:37
  Any any. No more teenage drama please.
• 29:39
  No more Romeo and Juliet. Yeah, yeah, coffee.
• 29:41
  I've had enough. OK, so.
• 29:43
  This one was posted today, which is why I think it's posted
• 29:46
  outside Ali because it's about something he's been posting
• 29:48
  about. OK, what?
• 29:49
  Salaam Alaik One of the most annoying things I see on social
• 29:53
  media are people stating that the prophet was illiterate.
• 29:58
  Being follows of the debate, we know these are lies and
• 30:00
  fabricated for the many reasons we have discussed in other
• 30:03
  threads. What do you guys think?
• 30:07
  I think he should listen to episode.
• 30:10
  Ali's very passionate about this episode, I.
• 30:11
  Think we all are? What episode now Muhammad just
• 30:13
  pull? Out just say yeah like whoever.
• 30:16
  It was like two or three episodes of.
• 30:17
  We actually I think dedicated 10 minutes on this point on that
• 30:22
  episode where we spoke about Osulallah, Muhammad, Sallallahu,
• 30:25
  Ali, Hawaii, Wasallam not being so.
• 30:27
  So this whoever posted this must have watched the episode and
• 30:29
  then come to post this here. Maybe you'll see the real.
• 30:33
  So basically people, this guy's annoyed that people say the Holy
• 30:36
  Prophet was illiterate. All right, just first thing to
• 30:39
  clarify, because I know we meant we made a real on this.
• 30:42
  First thing to clarify is it's a common belief, OK?
• 30:46
  Not saying right or wrong. It's a very common belief.
• 30:49
  All other schools of thought say that the Holy Prophet Muhammad
• 30:52
  Sallallahu Alaihi was on me in the sense that he was
• 30:55
  illiterate, OK? This other thing is within,
• 30:59
  within the Shia school of thought.
• 31:01
  Rather. Let me just finish, please,
• 31:03
  please. We're talking factually, yeah.
• 31:04
  Within the Shia school of thought.
• 31:06
  It's a very popular opinion, OK? A lot of Allama have said it, a
• 31:11
  lot of Maraja have said it, a lot of historians have said it,
• 31:14
  and therefore, excuse me. And therefore a lot of the
• 31:17
  community says that like it's a very split opinion.
• 31:20
  OK, now tell me what your opinion is like now, now that
• 31:24
  we've kind of. My opinion?
• 31:26
  Yeah, tell not opinion. What What?
• 31:27
  What you believe is fact because I aligned with you on this.
• 31:30
  You know when his hands are behind the the the chair he's
• 31:33
  about. Trading myself he's.
• 31:35
  About to smoke someone? No, no, I think it's not even,
• 31:38
  it's not even about smoking someone like it's, it's I think
• 31:41
  said Ali. And I believe that we believe
• 31:44
  the Holy Prophet Muhammad was not illiterate.
• 31:47
  We believe that the Holy Prophet Muhammad would be able to beat
• 31:53
  Usain Bolt on 100 meters. Yeah, we believe the Holy
• 31:57
  Prophet would be able to go Gordon Ramsay's chef show and
• 32:00
  beat everyone. And I'm not trying to be
• 32:01
  facetious. This is with the will of Allah,
• 32:03
  and He is not. Sad this is bit of an Allah
• 32:06
  subhanahu Allah like that the Holy Prophet can do anything
• 32:09
  with the permission of Allah. We see in the Holy Quran I think
• 32:13
  Muhammad Abbas Panji mentioned it that the Quran references in
• 32:18
  battle when Allah gives strength to 20 Mahmudian pious people to
• 32:22
  defeat 200 enemies of Allah. These are pious, ordinary people
• 32:27
  which talk about amid Amatmani lifting the gate of Khyber, but
• 32:31
  then later in the day going home and he can't snap bread on his
• 32:34
  on his leg. So we're talking about with the
• 32:37
  will of Allah. We believe the Holy Prophet
• 32:40
  gained that literacy, that knowledge.
• 32:42
  Oh, I think the confusion that many faces that they, that I
• 32:47
  think there's a lot of interpretations to the word umm
• 32:49
  me, yeah, umm, me. One of them, umm me can mean
• 32:53
  illiterate. Then I think literally people
• 32:55
  have taken that as being the definition of the best of
• 32:59
  creation, which I disagree with because we know as he's the
• 33:04
  greatest creation of Allah, Allah.
• 33:07
  And that's just me and I'm talking from here and there.
• 33:09
  But if we go back to the hadith of their debate, Alima Abdullah
• 33:13
  salati waisqa Salaam, we have, I think I referenced this as well
• 33:18
  on the episode where I said Imam and Jawad Ali Salaam, Imal Baker
• 33:23
  Ali Salaam, that's two of your imams brother.
• 33:26
  They're telling you anyone, anyone who says that Allah,
• 33:30
  Salallahu Alaihi wasallam was illiterate is a liar and is
• 33:37
  cursed. He's what say with me?
• 33:40
  I must say, say, say, say anyone who says the Prophet is
• 33:42
  illiterate. I'm just got on the I've got the
• 33:44
  hadith is a liar Anil Akhbar by Sheikh Sadouq and Ilal Bashar to
• 33:49
  two books of Sheikh Sadouq where a man came to this hadith
• 33:53
  specifically talking about Imam Jawad Ali Salam where it says O
• 33:57
  son of the messenger of Allah. Why was the prophet named a
• 33:59
  little me and Mama Jawad said why do the people he said they
• 34:03
  claim he was named a little me because he was not able to write
• 34:07
  so they mum said they have lied upon them is the curse of Allah.
• 34:09
  How can that be when Allah has said that clearly in his book he
• 34:13
  is the one who has sent him sent among the Makin people a
• 34:17
  messenger from amongst them to recite his verses and to purify
• 34:20
  them and to teach them the book of wisdom.
• 34:23
  But on 62 verse #3. So how was he able to teach the
• 34:27
  people that which he did not know by Allah?
• 34:29
  Indeed, the message of Allah used to read and write in 72 or
• 34:34
  perhaps 73 languages. He was only called a little me
• 34:37
  because he was from the people of Mecca.
• 34:39
  And the people of Makkah is known as the mothers of all
• 34:41
  lands of Malkona. And that is the book, that is
• 34:46
  the saying of the last Pantala in his holy book so that you may
• 34:49
  warn Umm al Qura, IE Makkah and those around it.
• 34:52
  That is the hadith from Imam, Jawad and Islam as referenced in
• 34:55
  the time of Shelter to do, who's our most senior classical
• 34:58
  scholar in our Matthab. Thank you for finding that
• 35:00
  reference, by the way. That's why, bro.
• 35:04
  But there you have it, right. But I I think also just to come
• 35:08
  back on the interpretation of that word on me.
• 35:10
  Look, if we want to take it literally and say he didn't know
• 35:13
  how to read and write, no problem.
• 35:15
  Yeah, no problem. It just means he wasn't taught
• 35:19
  by a human how to read and write.
• 35:21
  It was God-given. That's a miracle.
• 35:22
  And and that's believable, Yeah. If I'm going to be real with
• 35:25
  you, it's believable that the Holy Prophet wasn't taught by a
• 35:28
  human to read or write. But that must be where it stems
• 35:30
  from, because. Yeah, of course.
• 35:32
  Most people won't be able to fathom.
• 35:33
  That no, because people actually, of course.
• 35:36
  Logically speaking, he was born as an orphan in the desert,
• 35:39
  raised by a wetness, and his mother died when he was a kid,
• 35:41
  and his grandfather died when he was a kid.
• 35:43
  And his father died before he was born.
• 35:44
  And he was from a family which didn't have the means and a
• 35:48
  society which didn't teach literacy to everyone.
• 35:50
  Of course it's understandable that he couldn't read and write
• 35:53
  or wasn't taught by a person. We're talking about him being
• 35:55
  able to learn knowledge from Alas panel to Allah bro, come on
• 36:00
  man. And we're talking, they're
• 36:01
  saying yeah, but it doesn't. You know he's muscle.
• 36:04
  No, it doesn't mean that. He there's no there's no proof
• 36:07
  he can read and write, although there's no evidence he was
• 36:09
  taught I I defeats the whole thing of being the best creation
• 36:12
  of Allah in in a way right anyhow.
• 36:17
  Yeah, yeah. Let's move on.
• 36:17
  The last. Can I ask for dilemma, man?
• 36:19
  Can I add one last thing to this?
• 36:21
  Gone. Yeah.
• 36:22
  Max, for me, yeah, OK is beyond sinlessness.
• 36:27
  Right, it's greater than that. So it extends also to flaws,
• 36:31
  right? And which is outside of the
• 36:33
  realms and irrelevant to calm halal and Haram.
• 36:36
  So we believe that the the Mahsom Prophet, peace be upon
• 36:43
  him, his family was not flawed. It's very important.
• 36:47
  I'm not saying that he was. He could shape shift, for
• 36:49
  example, like someone might say, oh, if you're 510, you're flawed
• 36:53
  because you're not 6 foot. Nah, bro, I'm talking about he
• 36:55
  was not flawed when it comes to teaching the knowledge of the
• 36:58
  book. Do you get what I'm saying?
• 36:59
  So Allah gave him that will and that scene in our hadith.
• 37:03
  Flawless. Yeah, yeah.
• 37:05
  So it's different. FLAW.
• 37:08
  OK, Shalaw E. The blessing shalaw cannot speak
• 37:11
  Quranic like say Ali sick God. OK next one let's go.
• 37:17
  I recently got Hedaya from Allah who opened my heart to the love
• 37:20
  of El Beit. About who My parents and family
• 37:23
  we rarely speak. I come from a very not very
• 37:26
  religious Sunni background and both both sides of my family
• 37:29
  don't even know anything other than the five pillars of Islam.
• 37:35
  After that everything they rely on is molanas and scholars so on
• 37:38
  so on so on. Since last year I started
• 37:40
  reading hadith from Sahih, Muslim and Bukhari and I got
• 37:44
  shocked to see that the claims that Shias make about us are
• 37:48
  there in Sunni books. So I started digging and asking
• 37:51
  scholars and they told me to stay away from this don't listen
• 37:55
  to Shias scholars. So I started my and I started my
• 37:59
  journey a couple of days before Muharram and this whole Muharram
• 38:04
  and Hamdullah with some connections and and friends
• 38:06
  regularly visited Husseinias learning about Karbala and
• 38:12
  reality La La La La la. Where are we here Now My
• 38:16
  question is that since Muharram every time I see anything
• 38:19
  related to Karbala I start crying.
• 38:21
  I can't help it. Even at work when I watch a
• 38:23
  video I start crying. So is this normal and how do I
• 38:27
  overcome this well? This is hub.
• 38:30
  This requires a Salah. What?
• 38:34
  This is very similar to remember Abdullah Tarek we had on the
• 38:37
  podcast a few years ago. So he was suddenly and he used
• 38:41
  to join discussions online and they made him cry.
• 38:43
  Well. I don't know what the dilemma
• 38:47
  is. Mangoes.
• 38:47
  Is it is it normal? Yeah, bro, It's it's a blessing.
• 38:50
  In fact, this is true love because you found it, you're not
• 38:53
  being born into it. And the only other thing I'll
• 38:56
  add is like. I think if anything, us being
• 38:58
  born into it, sometimes we we find.
• 39:00
  We take it for granted so. We we take it for granted and we
• 39:03
  find it difficult sometimes to like have a connection when we
• 39:06
  really want. To no, I think he, he mentioned
• 39:11
  the point where he said actually I think 2 important points.
• 39:14
  First one being we started reading into his own books,
• 39:19
  which was the the books of what's called Sahih Muslim and
• 39:23
  Bukhari and as well as that exposing certain things.
• 39:32
  And then the other part was him, whenever he has the Muslib of
• 39:36
  moment for saying you can't help but cry.
• 39:38
  I think we'll start with that one first, a moment.
• 39:40
  That's fine. I think anyone who can shed
• 39:43
  their tear for about Abdullah Al Hussein is blessed, right?
• 39:49
  Because the tears are greater than just emotion.
• 39:52
  Like we have Hamdullah Yoshiyano.
• 39:54
  So Hamdullah, we have full belief and we can back this up
• 39:59
  that crying for about Abdullah Al Hussein.
• 40:01
  It's something that extinguishes your sins, right?
• 40:05
  So that's on one level. The the the other one is when
• 40:08
  you cry, if you can cry by the mention of hossein, know that
• 40:11
  Allah loves you bro Haba Lam and Haba Hossein and know that you
• 40:15
  make Rasul Allah proud, Hossein and minni when I'm in hossein.
• 40:18
  So that relationship we have with ABBA Abdullah on one level
• 40:22
  is solid that you can't go wrong.
• 40:23
  And once you have the love of Hossein I, I wouldn't say that's
• 40:27
  the only thing you require in terms of connection, innovation,
• 40:30
  bro, but I sense. So you're good like you've your
• 40:33
  foundation is good You're you're chilling like you've got that
• 40:36
  and you know that you can't you can't lose and and leave
• 40:38
  religion. I I believe Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 40:40
  Like I, I found that whenever I'm spiritually low love of
• 40:44
  Obama, Hussein pulls me back in and then it spreads.
• 40:47
  It spreads to every area of my life in connection with my my
• 40:50
  Lord and and they're focusing my Salah and do you get me the, the
• 40:54
  everything the soul I do must have had.
• 40:56
  But I do like these kind of things.
• 40:58
  I do. I'm not saying the root of it
• 41:01
  is, is Karbala, but I'm saying that the love I have for Karbala
• 41:05
  is infested inside. Like you get what I'm saying?
• 41:07
  Like it's taking over me. You get what I'm saying.
• 41:10
  So like when you get that? What sprinkles in you?
• 41:13
  Overflows in me, but I'm saying like, bro, that love that love
• 41:17
  it when it takes over you. It's a blessing.
• 41:20
  One life's a blessing and and and hold on to that precious
• 41:24
  love that you have inside you and treasure it.
• 41:26
  Cherish. It you get me?
• 41:27
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. The second thing about the
• 41:30
  hadith. All right, okay, cool.
• 41:31
  First things first, the books of a hadith for Asuna Jamar.
• 41:36
  Of course I say hey to them. It's ironic because there's a
• 41:40
  lot of our hadith which the ulama will say, actually, wait,
• 41:43
  this one's not Sahi. No, this one is weak.
• 41:45
  No, no, actually this one is a, is a.
• 41:47
  You know what? The Senate is bad.
• 41:50
  You know how much this confuses me is when they'll so the local
• 41:54
  Bukhari, it's called Sahih Bukhari, and they'll say this
• 41:57
  one's life. Yeah, exactly.
• 41:59
  If it's. All sahih.
• 42:01
  It's I won't bother about life. All, all the, all the
• 42:03
  questionable ones are life. Do you get me?
• 42:06
  It's like not, not like any of the nice ones.
• 42:09
  But the question was, that's number one.
• 42:10
  The second thing is the Hadith of the Shia, which we've
• 42:13
  mentioned recently, I think it was in last week's pod or the
• 42:16
  week before. The, the, the, the hadith, the
• 42:19
  vast majority of the hadith in our books are fact checked.
• 42:23
  You know, we hear, we hear incidents in our books where
• 42:28
  like a companion would sit, Abu Barseer would sit with the 6th
• 42:32
  in month. Jose, MO would sit with the
• 42:33
  first in month. Like different, different, what
• 42:37
  you call it would sit with the Imams, companions would sit the
• 42:40
  Imams and UNICEF and Abdul Rahman would sit with the Imam
• 42:45
  and like that they would show their works to the Imams, their
• 42:49
  hadith books and the Imams would go through them.
• 42:51
  UNICEF Abdul Rahman we mentioned two weeks ago showed his book to
• 42:54
  the Imam and the Imam says from cover to cover, may Allah bless
• 42:57
  you and your family. Like everything here is legit.
• 42:59
  So we believe that the vast majority of our hadith are fact
• 43:03
  checked by the sons of Rasulullah.
• 43:05
  Do you know what I mean? So there's there's little to no
• 43:10
  margin for error. Not just that, they never
• 43:12
  contradict. Come on.
• 43:13
  There's. All the sons of Rasulullah, they
• 43:15
  go hand in hand and they're lines.
• 43:17
  Bro, it's it's like a, a Sheikh Armani mentioned it really well
• 43:20
  on the Gemani's podcast. He's like, it's like a puzzle
• 43:23
  and they it's different pieces and nothing is out of place.
• 43:26
  So you might find a piece of the puzzle here and a piece of the
• 43:28
  puzzle there, but they fit because there's unity in that
• 43:32
  hadith. The messaging is clear.
• 43:33
  It's core. Don't eat like, you know,
• 43:36
  there's the, the messaging is there from the first Imam to the
• 43:39
  12th Imam and, and, and, and all of course, come from Salah.
• 43:43
  It's all there. It's clear.
• 43:44
  That's the majority. Obviously there are hadith which
• 43:46
  are questionable and which we reject, but that's a minority
• 43:50
  bro. Do you know when Wishtable was
• 43:52
  reading this dilemma? Yeah, I was remembering that
• 43:55
  viral clip by Dottie, the Street Sheikh.
• 43:57
  The more Muslim I read, the more I think that was good, because I
• 44:03
  think that raised the awareness of the reality of what.
• 44:06
  You know what camera looks like your eyes has disappeared
• 44:09
  Camera. Looks like, oh, my days, yeah.
• 44:18
  But you know, it makes you think.
• 44:20
  And one like it gave me a this is a true, a true, a true story.
• 44:25
  Yeah. I used to work somewhere and
• 44:28
  right beside me there was another person, different person
• 44:31
  working basically as in the premises next door, not in the
• 44:35
  same workplace. I'd go there, say hi, Saddam.
• 44:42
  Brother was a Muslim from Algeria.
• 44:45
  I think when I say brother, I knew at the time I was, I think
• 44:50
  2627. And this brother was, like, in
• 44:52
  his 40s, OK. From Algeria.
• 44:55
  Every Friday. Yeah.
• 44:57
  Every Friday, he'll disappear for Jamaa prayers.
• 45:00
  Yeah. And he'll always tell me, come,
• 45:04
  come, come, come, come. First, I couldn't go, right.
• 45:09
  Secondly, I was like, brother, were you praying?
• 45:15
  What's the imam? What's the imam of the Jamaa
• 45:18
  saying? Like what does he say?
• 45:20
  You know you're Shia. Yeah, he knows I'm Shia.
• 45:22
  OK, so you know, I go, he goes, no, come, come, come.
• 45:27
  I'm like, OK, I can only come as long as the Imam of that mosque
• 45:30
  that Masjid is will tell me the truth, will tell you the truth
• 45:34
  and doesn't lie to your to the congregation, right.
• 45:37
  So he's like, what do you want me to tell him?
• 45:40
  So I was like, I want you to go tell him, you know, when he
• 45:42
  starts his hot war, Anita Rakvikum, you know, the the
• 45:47
  prophet left behind the Quran and the Sunnah.
• 45:49
  I want you to tell him to show you where that is because last I
• 45:53
  read, the last I checked and fact checked in your books, the
• 45:57
  Prophet clearly mentioned it was the Quran in that debate.
• 46:00
  So if he does study his Quran in that debate.
• 46:02
  And why have you been lying to me for the last 17 years you've
• 46:04
  been here in the UK that you've been called every Friday, right?
• 46:07
  I swear by God. After that day, he disappeared.
• 46:10
  He left his work, never saw me again, No.
• 46:13
  Way. Yeah, it is him.
• 46:14
  Yeah, no, no, I said we said bye and that's it.
• 46:16
  And he didn't when I told him. Bro, did you speak to your mom?
• 46:20
  He didn't even answer me which I knew.
• 46:22
  The answer is that Hafia, this guy has been so lied to in the
• 46:25
  last 17 years of him being in the UK where he's believed that
• 46:30
  the Rasul Allah said I leave behind the Quran and the Sunnah,
• 46:33
  whereas Rasul Allah has told you I leave behind the Quran and my
• 46:36
  little bit. That's mad.
• 46:39
  That's what I'm telling you. If you read, going back to the
• 46:42
  dilemma, if you open up Sahih Bukhari or Sahihi Muslim, I
• 46:49
  think there's enough truth, there is enough reality.
• 46:54
  To guide you to. There is enough.
• 46:55
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. To reflect 1 because you can
• 46:58
  also come across other things like certain man's dying, angry
• 47:02
  with. But there's also beauty there.
• 47:05
  There is, there will be elements because look, there is
• 47:08
  commonality, there is overlap. Of course, you know, we're
• 47:11
  talking about hundreds of thousands of hadith.
• 47:13
  You know, there's hadith which talks about the beautiful akhlaq
• 47:16
  of Salah, of the righteous companions of Allah, the
• 47:20
  righteous wives of the Prophet. You know, these are very
• 47:22
  important hadith. And there are some hadith which
• 47:24
  are of course questionable and there are some hadith which are
• 47:27
  accepted by all of ahed. So like you said, you can find
• 47:32
  Haq from anywhere. And even for us, we're on that
• 47:37
  journey. Our knowledge of hadith is
• 47:40
  nowhere near where it needs to be.
• 47:42
  Nowhere near. And I don't just mean myself as
• 47:45
  an individual, but also our community, because a lot of our
• 47:48
  youth can't name two books of hadith.
• 47:51
  I'm serious bro. I'll start telling you.
• 47:54
  Save such idea. See what I mean?
• 47:57
  It's not even hadith, but I'm saying like that the knowledge
• 48:00
  of literature is very weak. So yeah, I agree Much should
• 48:05
  move on. We'll do one more, two more.
• 48:08
  How long we do this? One's a bit long, so.
• 48:11
  Last one last. One last let's do this and.
• 48:13
  See how we go. I'm 18 and.
• 48:16
  I still haven't worn a hijab. My two older sisters are both
• 48:19
  hijabis and they understand why I haven't worn it yet because
• 48:23
  they know they don't understand. No, they understand because they
• 48:27
  know why why I don't feel ready. I know at the age of 9 I should
• 48:31
  have worn the hijab but I was never ready for it.
• 48:34
  My parents would always bring it up and I was getting fed up by
• 48:37
  it. Every time I think about wearing
• 48:39
  a hijab it's never because I want to do it just for my
• 48:42
  parents to stop nagging. But I know if I wore the hijab
• 48:44
  tomorrow, I will take off the next day.
• 48:48
  I want to. Do it?
• 48:48
  I want to wear it. To actually wear it and not
• 48:51
  loosely wear it. I don't want to wear it just to
• 48:53
  fill an obligation. I feel like my parents don't
• 48:58
  want to. Acknowledge that I'd like to
• 49:00
  believe I'm a good Muslim, but my parents keep making me feel
• 49:02
  like I'm not because I'm not wearing the hijab.
• 49:08
  She goes on to say that. Her clothing is all right and
• 49:11
  everything she does is OK, she's a good Muslim, but it's just the
• 49:15
  hijab. This is making me distant from
• 49:18
  my distance myself from them because every time I am near
• 49:21
  them they talk about the hijab over and over again.
• 49:25
  I would. Go and do.
• 49:26
  I'm feeling so awful right now and I'm so far away from my
• 49:29
  parents and honestly I feel like I would wear it if I was free of
• 49:34
  them. My parents have always been
• 49:35
  understanding about everything and they respect my boundaries
• 49:39
  and privacy and trust me and I know why they're telling me to
• 49:43
  wear it but their insistence just pushing me further and
• 49:47
  further away. How can I find?
• 49:49
  Myself to wear the hijab. This should be more.
• 49:56
  Sister, to be honest, yeah, this is one person, but just.
• 49:59
  Islamically like what? Do you think rather than advice
• 50:03
  well, the longer that hijab? Is off the less likely I think
• 50:08
  one will decide to eventually put on.
• 50:13
  How old was she 18? She's 1818.
• 50:17
  Well. Some will say nine years too
• 50:20
  late, right? Well, I don't know where to
• 50:22
  begin, especially with, you know, this.
• 50:24
  I'm not even going to tell you it's a sensitive topic because
• 50:26
  they should never be sensitive. Anything that's mandatory in
• 50:28
  Islam should be. We should be comfortable to
• 50:30
  discuss, right? That's a very, very.
• 50:32
  Damn, good point. But what I would say Jesus
• 50:34
  Christ. What, what what I would.
• 50:36
  Say is that I've. I have a sense of feeling that
• 50:39
  there is some form of rebellion happening where you are saying I
• 50:45
  don't want to wear the hijab because your parents are telling
• 50:48
  you to wear the hijab. At the end of the day, it's just
• 50:50
  that that can always that can also be just an.
• 50:52
  Excuse that, You keep telling yourself, Yeah, yeah.
• 50:54
  So there's like, you know, teenagers and.
• 50:56
  Things that like to be rebellious right?
• 50:58
  Yeah. But you you're if.
• 51:00
  You're telling yourself that you're being being rebellious
• 51:02
  because your parents are saying this, when in fact it's just
• 51:05
  you're giving yourself a reason to not wear the hijab.
• 51:07
  Oh well, you come up with many actually.
• 51:08
  You don't want to. Wear it.
• 51:09
  You'll come up with many excuses and this is not you.
• 51:12
  This is the swast of Shaitaan. And Shaitaan is very good that
• 51:15
  way he does right? And you know, it's the problem
• 51:19
  is I think we want Islam to be how we want to see ourselves,
• 51:27
  but that's not the reality. I mean, when someone I don't use
• 51:34
  this term, right, we've always heard the term of only God can
• 51:36
  judge me. I'm a good person, right?
• 51:38
  The problem is when we use that phrase, we forget that Allah is
• 51:40
  going to judge us. That's the whole point here on
• 51:43
  this earth, number one. But at the same time, I think
• 51:47
  one has to consider that if because I don't think she's
• 51:51
  alone in this where they say, oh, my dad or my mum, they're
• 51:55
  telling me to put on the hijab. They say that because they want
• 51:58
  the best for you. Trust me, they do.
• 52:00
  And it's not had there not been the command of Allah, they will
• 52:03
  not tell you to wear it right? So.
• 52:08
  There is one comment said where it's saying that you're lucky
• 52:12
  that your parents are even reminding you because if you're
• 52:14
  having thoughts like that, then you wouldn't even had the
• 52:16
  thought to wear the hijab and the you know, there are sisters
• 52:18
  out there, Ahmed and. Mushtabah that fathers are
• 52:21
  telling their daughters to take off the hijab.
• 52:24
  So first you should be grateful that you have parents who look
• 52:27
  out for you and want the best for you.
• 52:29
  And you should see hijab as a form of a jewel.
• 52:34
  It's not. It's not something that the
• 52:37
  problem is. I'm going to say I don't want to
• 52:38
  mention your friends. I don't know.
• 52:40
  You haven't spoken about your friends circle.
• 52:42
  Do they wear hijab? Because I've seen this trend
• 52:44
  where if a circle of friends doesn't wear hijab, yeah, it's a
• 52:47
  bad impression they won't wear hijab.
• 52:49
  If a circle of. Friends wear lose hijab, they'll
• 52:52
  all wear lose hijab If a circle of friends wear TikTok hijab,
• 52:55
  they'll all wear TikTok hijab if a certain friend was hijab.
• 52:58
  So I'm not going to tell you what's the best hijab, but they
• 53:00
  were what's acceptable within Islamic law.
• 53:04
  You are the average of the five people you surround yourself
• 53:06
  with, right? So maybe you're just not with
• 53:09
  the right people. I mean, your family are there,
• 53:11
  your sister's Marshall our and the hijab, your mother and your
• 53:13
  father advising you to wear the hijab.
• 53:15
  It's just maybe you are lost in between what your family want
• 53:19
  for you and a loss of Hanoi Wata Ala and your friends.
• 53:22
  So maybe that's the problem, right?
• 53:25
  See your friends circle, see how the hijab is, what their opinion
• 53:28
  on hijab is. And maybe your friends are not
• 53:30
  even Muslim and there's a nice follow up to it where someone
• 53:33
  goes. Hi, I wore the hijab when I was
• 53:35
  22. I always said to myself that I
• 53:37
  wasn't ready when people asked me.
• 53:40
  I I. Was surrounded by.
• 53:41
  People who wore it but my mother didn't wear it.
• 53:45
  My parents always told me the hijab is my journey and I think
• 53:47
  I didn't wear it because my I didn't see my mom wearing it.
• 53:50
  I wish they told me to wear it when I was younger around 17 or
• 53:54
  18. I was thinking about wearing it
• 53:56
  every single day but I was scared and didn't know how I
• 53:58
  would go from not wearing a hijab to becoming a hijabi
• 54:01
  overnight. I talked to my sister.
• 54:04
  And she said, Oh my. God I've been thinking about
• 54:06
  wearing it too and Al Hamdallah we both wore it within weeks of
• 54:09
  each other. We have been wearing it ever
• 54:11
  since and now after 20 years of my mum not wearing it, she has
• 54:15
  started wearing the hijab as well.
• 54:17
  Wearing the hijab was. Truly a turning point in.
• 54:19
  My region because because because for the 1st.
• 54:22
  Time I felt like a. Representative of Islam
• 54:24
  outwardly. So there's a couple.
• 54:29
  Points I I have in mind. The first point is.
• 54:35
  Again. Another very common issue,
• 54:38
  without shadow of a doubt, rampant in the Western world,
• 54:41
  rampant maybe even in the Eastern world before we know,
• 54:44
  but rampant in today's day and age.
• 54:48
  Defiance is like a core part of it.
• 54:52
  And her defiance to wearing hijab comes from, again, like we
• 54:55
  said earlier, the the desire for liberation and independent
• 54:58
  decision making. She wants to feel like I'm
• 55:00
  making the decision when I want to make it.
• 55:02
  I am on my own journey, which is a phrase we hear a lot.
• 55:06
  Everyone's on their own journey, do you know?
• 55:10
  What I mean and? It's true.
• 55:12
  Like people are on their own journey, but don't use that as
• 55:15
  like a what's the valid excuse? Yeah.
• 55:19
  And like you're. Scapegoating.
• 55:21
  That phrase and using it as like a human shield.
• 55:24
  Do you know what I'm saying? Like every time someone comes at
• 55:26
  you, you're going to be like, yeah, yeah, I'm on my own
• 55:28
  journey, leave me alone. So that's the first thing, yeah,
• 55:33
  be real with yourself. Like if you, if you don't want
• 55:36
  to wear it yet, that's OK, But be real.
• 55:38
  Don't be like, yeah, I want to wear it, but I want to wear it
• 55:41
  when. Like if you do want to wear it
• 55:43
  when the time's right, when you say it's OK, you mean the
• 55:44
  struggle is? OK.
• 55:45
  To feel that struggle, the struggle is OK.
• 55:47
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think like you're on your
• 55:49
  journey to learn more about HR but if you're stagnant on that,
• 55:52
  like you're not actively making an effort, then don't say it
• 55:55
  because I don't think that's that's real.
• 55:57
  In my opinion. My mind's are harsh.
• 55:59
  Secondly, do we know what hijab is?
• 56:03
  Because if we don't know what hijab is, we won't we won't
• 56:06
  engage in it the same way. It's tahfar.
• 56:09
  It's tahfar. It's tahfar.
• 56:11
  We hear all the time. Just tahfar.
• 56:12
  You want baraka, do is tahfar. You want risk do is tahfar?
• 56:16
  We hear about it. Do we know what is tahfar is?
• 56:19
  No. If we truly knew about is
• 56:21
  tahfar, we'd be doing it every day.
• 56:23
  So now what? You know, I had something the
• 56:25
  other day Allah told one of his students, say 3000 times a day,
• 56:31
  la ilaha. Why?
• 56:35
  Because that manifestation of those thoughts will eventually
• 56:39
  become a dominant thought process for you.
• 56:43
  And that if you spend your time doing 3000 a day and you're
• 56:47
  focusing let's say on 10% of those 3000, eventually it will
• 56:51
  dominate your thought process. So in the same way, the yearning
• 56:54
  for knowledge and the research you do about hijab or Salah or
• 56:59
  estafar or zakat or anything like that will then manifest in
• 57:04
  you. She get what I'm saying?
• 57:05
  Yeah. The last thing I'll say is that
• 57:09
  very similar to what the sister who commented after, which was
• 57:12
  beautiful about her, how she started at 22 and she wishes
• 57:16
  started earlier, you never know. Like if you try it one.
• 57:21
  Day and you put aside like like that sister said something
• 57:24
  really interesting in in the main post.
• 57:26
  She goes, I know if I put it on today, I'll take it off
• 57:29
  tomorrow. Don't say that man.
• 57:31
  Like don't put that on yourself. Don't don't put that negative
• 57:34
  energy on yourself. It's like me saying yeah, bro, I
• 57:37
  know if I wake up for fujo tomorrow, I'm definitely not
• 57:39
  going to wake up the next day. Why, bro, just like just focus
• 57:44
  on day one after day one, focus on day 2.
• 57:47
  Why are you logging your life out?
• 57:49
  Do you know what I'm saying? Like it just, you know, like
• 57:51
  before the move on stating that initiative that first.
• 57:53
  Before the move on, do you remember when?
• 57:55
  I remember when I was like 1314, yeah.
• 57:57
  I'll be real. How the heck am I going to do 30
• 58:00
  days? Sometimes I even feel like that
• 58:02
  now. I'll be real.
• 58:03
  But I remember thinking, how am I going to do a whole month?
• 58:07
  You know, my, my dad told me. I think, I think it was my dad,
• 58:11
  he said. Don't think about it, just take
• 58:13
  it day by day. It will get easier.
• 58:15
  You'll get into momentum a lot. Makes it easy for you Well and I
• 58:18
  think the best thing one can do. Is like you said just to add and
• 58:22
  sorry I know I just stopped my conversation.
• 58:25
  Just I was going to say bro. Just just put it on, try it.
• 58:28
  The fact you're saying I know I'm going to take it off
• 58:30
  tomorrow, but you don't know that you don't know that you
• 58:33
  haven't put it on yet. A lot make it easy for you and
• 58:35
  Charlotte and to make. It easy, ask the last.
• 58:37
  Panel to make it easy backing you.
• 58:39
  You have us backing you. If that means anything.
• 58:41
  Of course we will love. We will love your actions and as
• 58:44
  a result we will support you and not just us.
• 58:47
  Bro I'm like we're irrelevant. We don't.
• 58:48
  Imagine we logged back in to the Reddit.
• 58:50
  Post like in two months time and she she's she said after your
• 58:53
  words, I decided to put on that's amazing.
• 58:56
  Listen to the. Podcast we did it with sisters.
• 58:58
  I was well, I just take, I took out.
• 59:00
  The episode number, episode number 85, where we had a
• 59:03
  phenomenal educational beneficial discussion on the
• 59:06
  struggles of hijab. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 59:08
  And I as a man, I sort of understood company of the
• 59:11
  struggles some of the sisters go through, right?
• 59:12
  Yeah, it's very difficult. We just think about.
• 59:14
  As God come. On but society is really
• 59:17
  challenging we as men, ultimately.
• 59:20
  Like, we can't comment on their struggle, but what we can
• 59:23
  comment on is our, like you said, our leader.
• 59:25
  Yeah, we just want to protect our women.
• 59:28
  That's one of our core innate male duties and desires, the
• 59:33
  protect, protection of our women.
• 59:35
  And if someone turns around and says, how does that protect
• 59:37
  women? You guys are like this and that,
• 59:40
  then unfortunately, you've not understood the hijab.
• 59:43
  It's just as simple as that. You know, I once said something
• 59:46
  and. Some people I don't think have
• 59:48
  understood it. I think I said it was in that
• 59:50
  episode. I think maybe I should clarify.
• 59:52
  And now I was, like I said, the point of if someone.
• 59:57
  Hasn't understood. Hijab they haven't understood
• 1:00:00
  Allah span of Attallah because I don't mean they don't know who
• 1:00:03
  God is shallow. We all know who our creator, our
• 1:00:07
  master and who we are servants and slaves to.
• 1:00:09
  And there's Allah Azza wajal span of Attallah, but they
• 1:00:12
  haven't understood why he commands it from you.
• 1:00:15
  They haven't understood why he wants that off you right?
• 1:00:18
  Just like very simply, it's like someone telling you, you know,
• 1:00:21
  why? Why do we pray?
• 1:00:23
  Like why does God need us to pray, right?
• 1:00:25
  But you haven't understood why you do masala.
• 1:00:27
  You know, why does God want us to not eat and not drink for 30
• 1:00:32
  days Ramadan, right? Why we why is he making us
• 1:00:35
  suffer these long summer hours and whatnot?
• 1:00:37
  But you don't know the benefits behind them, right?
• 1:00:39
  So if we sort of try to understand why God wants this
• 1:00:45
  from us, we have to start with our Soledin.
• 1:00:47
  Once you're Soledin are in Czech, I say it.
• 1:00:49
  Everything else falls in. Place.
• 1:00:51
  Say it, say it, say it. Let's do a role play.
• 1:00:56
  Sounds sounds scary. Awful last.
• 1:00:59
  Time last time we just went awful last.
• 1:01:00
  Time we took me to a cafe. I'm going to come to you.
• 1:01:03
  That's what you're my you're. My.
• 1:01:05
  What'd you say? Gone.
• 1:01:08
  Gone. OK.
• 1:01:10
  All right, so. Imagine you're my my older
• 1:01:12
  brother. OK.
• 1:01:14
  All right. I'm going to come to you, and
• 1:01:16
  I'm going to say that I'm struggling.
• 1:01:19
  OK. All right.
• 1:01:21
  You ready? Yeah.
• 1:01:26
  Ali. I want to ask you something.
• 1:01:30
  Mum and dad. Keep telling me to wear hijab.
• 1:01:32
  I really don't want to. I want to, but I'm not ready
• 1:01:36
  yet. I know if I put it on today,
• 1:01:39
  I'll probably take it off tomorrow.
• 1:01:41
  Help me. I can't imagine you in hijab
• 1:01:45
  Mohammed. Someone someone in the comments
• 1:01:53
  please. Help this brother out, tell him
• 1:01:55
  how to play the game. Pray for me please.
• 1:01:59
  What I genuinely so the role players.
• 1:02:04
  Well, the problem is both. Forget it now I think.
• 1:02:06
  Jump in. You're going to look back at it,
• 1:02:08
  I think this is. Craig, he killed the vibe bro.
• 1:02:11
  He killed the vibe. I'm getting hungry, Ella.
• 1:02:14
  OK. Let me role play, let me roll,
• 1:02:16
  OK? You be your sister, OK?
• 1:02:18
  You be the sister. Oh, does.
• 1:02:19
  It have to be by hijab not do anything.
• 1:02:22
  The last one because I was going to do.
• 1:02:25
  Music. No, no, no music.
• 1:02:27
  Probably just put just do something I.
• 1:02:29
  I think this is like a gentleman.
• 1:02:30
  Role play, Yeah, Ahmed comes to you one day.
• 1:02:33
  And he goes, bro, Tupac just released a new album.
• 1:02:36
  You should listen to it, Tupac. Yeah, 1994 was that.
• 1:02:42
  I've got a serious one, Yeah. So it's a dilemma.
• 1:02:45
  Many Muslim families go through this.
• 1:02:47
  All right. You've come into.
• 1:02:51
  No, no, just do it. Just act it out.
• 1:02:54
  Act it out. Yeah, bro, OK.
• 1:02:57
  How much should we go eat? The food's ready on the table.
• 1:03:02
  Let's. Yeah.
• 1:03:05
  Let's go. What's?
• 1:03:07
  Food. Whose voice is that?
• 1:03:11
  Oh, Dad, the same. Let's go.
• 1:03:12
  Pray in it is there done on LBTV so So what Ali?
• 1:03:18
  Do you want to eat? But that's what's going on.
• 1:03:21
  I don't know. It's tricky, right?
• 1:03:23
  I'm hungry or eat with Malawi A. Law.
• 1:03:26
  No so but. They're all play ended now.
• 1:03:28
  Yeah. But in reality, that wasn't
• 1:03:30
  really a real play. No, the dilemma.
• 1:03:31
  Is, yeah. OK, it's food time.
• 1:03:34
  Let's say food is ready. Your family are insisting on you
• 1:03:38
  to come eat. You had that done in the
• 1:03:39
  background. What do you do?
• 1:03:40
  You go pray, Call us. What do you do?
• 1:03:42
  That's the answer. You go pray so you don't tell
• 1:03:45
  your. Family, no, but when you're when
• 1:03:47
  you're praying you're. Focused on me, on the food, like
• 1:03:49
  that's only if you eat with Mahalia I get.
• 1:03:51
  That I do get. That I No, no, he's right.
• 1:03:54
  He's right. That's the point I'm trying to
• 1:03:55
  make. He's right.
• 1:03:55
  You're going to think. Not just on the food.
• 1:03:57
  You're not thinking about rushing?
• 1:03:58
  No, because there's like they're waiting for.
• 1:04:00
  Me this that there's. A.
• 1:04:01
  There's a a moral. To this dilemma, if you've got
• 1:04:04
  if you've got good parents. And inshallah we we all got
• 1:04:07
  parents who are like that. There's a moral to this.
• 1:04:09
  Dilemma. Go on.
• 1:04:10
  There's that when you put yourself in those situations,
• 1:04:13
  you'll never ever going to be be able to understand who our last
• 1:04:16
  final taala is. That connection and that bond
• 1:04:18
  that you have with your Creator. It's not going to be
• 1:04:20
  understandable because when, when you when, OK, let me put it
• 1:04:23
  to you this way, right? When we go to Salah, when we
• 1:04:26
  stand on the Preyema, when we say that could be Allah, Allah
• 1:04:30
  Akbar, what's the first thing? That comes to our.
• 1:04:33
  Head as we recite, sort of hand. Everything is my invoice.
• 1:04:38
  Being paid. Right.
• 1:04:41
  Did my. Friends like my.
• 1:04:42
  Instagram post What am I going to have for breakfast tomorrow?
• 1:04:45
  What did my colleagues say? All of this while we're praying
• 1:04:48
  to God. And then we finished, and we ask
• 1:04:50
  God for everything. So what's for mud?
• 1:04:54
  Whatever. Ahmed is in the past 12.
• 1:04:57
  And we'll eat in shallow, whatever the wife.
• 1:05:00
  Has made for us whatever the whatever the.
• 1:05:04
  Wife has made Do you cook whatever?
• 1:05:05
  Cook. Yeah, that's a big question.
• 1:05:09
  What kind of cooking? Like preparing cereal, fruits,
• 1:05:14
  frying an egg. What's the?
• 1:05:16
  What's the? Best meal?
• 1:05:18
  You know how to make omelette say 1?
• 1:05:21
  Honestly. You can't cook anything.
• 1:05:23
  No, bro handler bro. You've been my 10 years handler.
• 1:05:27
  Burgers on the grill. You don't know how.
• 1:05:29
  To make like BBQ. You can't do BBQ.
• 1:05:31
  I can grill, but I can't. Prepare, marinade, all of that.
• 1:05:35
  No, I don't know. OK.
• 1:05:36
  We'll do it together in Shala Shala.
• 1:05:38
  What about steaks? Can you steaks?
• 1:05:40
  I can. Grill steaks.
• 1:05:41
  Yeah, everyone. I think steaks is.
• 1:05:44
  In terms of. The best tasting thing I can
• 1:05:46
  make is steaks. Straightforward.
• 1:05:49
  No. In terms of the marinade, put
• 1:05:50
  some. Black pepper and you're done.
• 1:05:52
  Yeah, but I'm talking about like mixing.
• 1:05:53
  It up. I like doing different types of
• 1:05:55
  marinade. I can put the kebab on the sea
• 1:05:57
  and things. If that's what that's not
• 1:05:58
  cooking bro, that's. Hand eye coordination, you know
• 1:06:01
  what I'm saying? It's not.
• 1:06:02
  That's what I'm saying. Can you make?
• 1:06:06
  A cup. Can you make Chai?
• 1:06:07
  Go to Chai like. No, you mean but like the
• 1:06:12
  nothing? Not loose tea.
• 1:06:13
  I don't know. You make Chai like.
• 1:06:14
  If you're if. You're if you've got your.
• 1:06:16
  Family and stuff over this let's have Chai.
• 1:06:20
  The The thing is I've I've never had.
• 1:06:22
  The opportunity to make it, I've been blessed.
• 1:06:25
  I think. Chava in a positive way, but you
• 1:06:28
  need to learn. Because you know, as in I know
• 1:06:31
  the basics. Yeah, like if you tell me to
• 1:06:33
  make, well, like an omelette. I know, I know.
• 1:06:39
  How to make rice? OK, I know how.
• 1:06:42
  Yeah. Just rice.
• 1:06:42
  That's good. I don't.
• 1:06:43
  Have to make marga though. For example if you could make a
• 1:06:46
  Curry or marga. What?
• 1:06:47
  Would be the first one you you would learn I think.
• 1:06:52
  Why? Chicken's a shell.
• 1:06:56
  Shall I tell you the truth? I don't.
• 1:06:57
  Even know how to make I should know this, right?
• 1:07:01
  It's like a rock. It's just like grinded.
• 1:07:04
  Meat. No, no, that's the nature if you
• 1:07:05
  fight but your wife is. Putting you to work, you know
• 1:07:07
  that. Bro I swear to God with Allah.
• 1:07:10
  Rule you guys. Neither of you have lived out
• 1:07:11
  for university. Makes sense.
• 1:07:14
  I can. Make pot noodles.
• 1:07:15
  That's what you're talking about, But what did you?
• 1:07:18
  Think I was making. Hold of me sabzi in university.
• 1:07:21
  I don't know how to make sabzi. I can make rice.
• 1:07:23
  Yeah, I can make pasta, steak. I've made curries before.
• 1:07:27
  I've made biryanis before, although I don't put them in
• 1:07:29
  time. Please, let's go home.
• 1:07:31
  Coffee. I.
• 1:07:32
  May have never cooked OK. Maybe I have my memories.
• 1:07:35
  It's not working right now. OK, To the best of my knowledge,
• 1:07:39
  I have never cooked a meal. Oh, stir fry, anyway.
• 1:07:42
  Yeah. So my Mehdi comes.
• 1:07:43
  You're going to make an omelette.
• 1:07:44
  And and and cornflakes his. His wish is my command.
• 1:07:48
  For. Whatever he wants to show, I
• 1:07:49
  just like so Mum, mum and Mehdi. Comes to you, says saying, Ali,
• 1:07:53
  I want you to make me bagueto de.
• 1:07:56
  I'll ask for help. I'll ask the wife.
• 1:07:58
  Or, you know, like, that's the closest thing to an omelette.
• 1:08:02
  Yeah, but no the. The point I'm trying to make
• 1:08:04
  here is I, I jointly don't know the last time I've cooked.
• 1:08:08
  But if you can ask me for example, you know, do you ask
• 1:08:13
  for what food do you want till till today, Tandel, I've been
• 1:08:16
  married just on the 10 years till today I've never asked for
• 1:08:19
  a single meal. No way.
• 1:08:23
  So do you ever say whale craving?
• 1:08:24
  No, because sometimes. Because she can spend an.
• 1:08:27
  Hour telling me should. Treat what do you want?
• 1:08:29
  What should I make right? But sometimes I'll be remorse
• 1:08:32
  as. Whatever you make, I eat.
• 1:08:34
  Yeah, I'm the same but. Sometimes.
• 1:08:36
  No, I never say. Sometimes I may be.
• 1:08:38
  Craving something Ahmed, but I will never say Yeah, I know, but
• 1:08:41
  sometimes it's like for. Example whoever's making the.
• 1:08:44
  Meal your mom. Your wife, whoever, yeah, they
• 1:08:47
  give you options. I'll I'll give you options.
• 1:08:49
  As well. Second, it's like they they.
• 1:08:52
  Have run out of ideas or they just want you to be decisive.
• 1:08:56
  Bro just told me don't log my life out.
• 1:08:58
  Do you know what I mean? Like do you want tea or coffee
• 1:09:01
  or whatever you're feeling? No, just tell me, do you know
• 1:09:04
  what I mean? Like I'm just saying, yeah, I
• 1:09:08
  think it's nice sometimes to also have decisiveness.
• 1:09:12
  No, there's a hadith. No, but I think in a.
• 1:09:16
  In a different like point of view, your wife should sometime
• 1:09:21
  will probably feel proud that she's done something that you
• 1:09:24
  are craving. Yeah, so she'll give me options.
• 1:09:26
  Right, like no, but if if you've come home.
• 1:09:29
  And you've said I feel like Dalma tomorrow, OK.
• 1:09:32
  And then tomorrow she. She's going to make Dalma.
• 1:09:34
  She's going to be proud that she made Dalma because you were
• 1:09:36
  feeling. So let's say let's say it's
• 1:09:38
  like. 8:00 AM in the morning. Yeah, I'm hungry.
• 1:09:42
  I can say I really feel like DOMA right now.
• 1:09:45
  Not that happens at 8:00 AM in the morning.
• 1:09:46
  Yeah, obviously. But then randomly on Saturday
• 1:09:48
  night or Saturday evening, I see the DOMA being prepared, right.
• 1:09:53
  I think indirectly I saw all the white one, but yeah, yeah, yeah,
• 1:09:56
  yeah. I've never asked.
• 1:09:57
  For it and there is a. Hadith, by the way, that a man,
• 1:10:01
  a true man. It's not what family provides.
• 1:10:04
  Of course, of course, like there's.
• 1:10:06
  There's a difference between being I've seen those men are
• 1:10:08
  salty. And they throw the food.
• 1:10:11
  These guys are not men. But there's a difference between
• 1:10:13
  being demanding and being appreciative.
• 1:10:15
  Like for example, if you tell, if you tell your wife I love
• 1:10:19
  when you make this or I love how that tastes or do you know what
• 1:10:23
  I mean? Or for those people who live at
• 1:10:25
  home, they tell their mum or their grandmother or whatever.
• 1:10:27
  Like it's a love language. It's a love.
• 1:10:29
  Language. Yeah, it's.
• 1:10:30
  A it's a hymn that they do out of love for us.
• 1:10:33
  And you know, sometimes the fathers will do it if the wife's
• 1:10:36
  not around, mother's not around, Whoever's basically doing that
• 1:10:39
  service providing it's a hymn that you know what I mean?
• 1:10:42
  So sometimes for them, it's like they, if they want to like let's
• 1:10:45
  say your birthday, yeah, they want to make you a special meal.
• 1:10:48
  They say what do you want? Like if it was me and my I got
• 1:10:51
  asked a week before. You have a week to decide.
• 1:10:55
  Tell me what do you want bro, I'm telling you, I'm taking that
• 1:10:57
  decision really seriously and I will use that card.
• 1:11:01
  It's like the final meal, the final.
• 1:11:03
  Meal before the execution the US presence right What would your
• 1:11:06
  last that's a good. Question, last question and we
• 1:11:07
  close. What would be your last meal?
• 1:11:11
  Probably. Hard bread.
• 1:11:18
  I thought I'm messing with you. I'm.
• 1:11:23
  Messing with you. You know what?
• 1:11:28
  I. I genuinely don't know what my
• 1:11:31
  last meal would be, but I think it's definitely one that I.
• 1:11:37
  Shouldn't you thought you were going to say it?
• 1:11:38
  Like just. Bread.
• 1:11:40
  I thought you were going to say bread.
• 1:11:42
  I swear I died because I was, like you said, hard bread.
• 1:11:46
  Not even bread. Try, well, highly trying bread.
• 1:11:49
  Well, Ali in it. Even the mom, Ali, would have
• 1:11:53
  said dates. Say Ali, Oh my God, no, they.
• 1:11:59
  Say a good. I'm surprised you didn't say.
• 1:12:00
  Salt like just. Salt.
• 1:12:02
  Salt. Yeah, just salt.
• 1:12:03
  Do you know actually there is a mustard?
• 1:12:05
  Right. Yeah, I know, I know.
• 1:12:06
  I think it's not enough, I'm not mistaken, to have a pinch of
• 1:12:09
  salt before you eat. Before you eat?
• 1:12:10
  Yeah, salt. Alright boys.
• 1:12:12
  We'll leave it there. It's getting late.
• 1:12:16
  Yeah. I hope you've enjoyed this one.
• 1:12:18
  Say what your meal would be soft bread?
• 1:12:22
  No I'm joking, it's just annoying your bro.
• 1:12:26
  Look what I say, you make yours hummus.
• 1:12:29
  So. Ali has some bread to swap.
• 1:12:32
  Halfway God. Nice bro.
• 1:12:37
  Probably like what would be a final.
• 1:12:40
  Question from me that's relating to your last.
• 1:12:44
  Your last. Well, not your last meal, but
• 1:12:46
  your last phone call. God forbid.
• 1:12:49
  Yeah, I ain't going to go there. May Allah give you a long life,
• 1:12:53
  my brother. Who would be your last?
• 1:12:58
  Would it be your? Son, may Allah protect him, your
• 1:13:01
  daughter may Allah, it's probably be you.
• 1:13:03
  Yeah. OK, I'm saying that to to.
• 1:13:06
  End the conversation. So.
• 1:13:08
  Then I don't have to because I know if I say yeah, I'd call my
• 1:13:11
  flipping like cousin or something, like why?
• 1:13:14
  All right, guys, inshallah. We'll see you next week.
• 1:13:16
  It's been a very constructive conversation today.
• 1:13:19
  Oh, yeah. Inshallah.
• 1:13:20
  We're hoping to do an event. This is big news.
• 1:13:23
  This is a really. Important announcement.
• 1:13:25
  Well, big important announcement.
• 1:13:26
  We are hoping inshallah things go to plan and Allah makes it
• 1:13:30
  work to do an event around the time of the 13th of Rajib, the
• 1:13:33
  first ever after market event. So we've done live events like
• 1:13:38
  live podcasts, which have been hosted by amazing organizations
• 1:13:41
  around the world, but this is the first time which we want to
• 1:13:44
  host an event on our own and we want, we're hopefully in
• 1:13:50
  Charlotte going to have an incredible guest list of
• 1:13:52
  speakers who we've already been speaking to a really nice venue,
• 1:13:57
  really cool stuff, engaging stuff and unlike anything the
• 1:14:01
  share community seen in the UK before.
• 1:14:04
  So if you're not in the UK, start thinking about your
• 1:14:06
  tickets. If you are in the UK, start
• 1:14:09
  thinking about. We're looking at the.
• 1:14:11
  Weekend of 10th of July, January.
• 1:14:13
  Sorry, anyone want to free up our time?
• 1:14:16
  Hopefully by the time this. Thing.
• 1:14:18
  Comes out this podcast and it's to be the same.
• 1:14:20
  But yeah, that's if you keep yourself free for that.
• 1:14:23
  Weekend to attend the event, then do so guys just to
• 1:14:27
  reiterate. It will be ticketed, but A, it
• 1:14:31
  will be worth it, so make sure you come and B, anything that
• 1:14:34
  you are able to so that as many tickets as you can buy.
• 1:14:37
  We'll just go back towards the podcast.
• 1:14:39
  As we've said before, we don't take any cuts from it, so it
• 1:14:42
  just covers our cost. It covers the venue, it covers
• 1:14:44
  the production we do the work we do.
• 1:14:46
  Why are you doing that, Facebook?
• 1:14:49
  He's still thinking about the dry bread.
• 1:14:51
  Sorry, sorry. So yeah.
• 1:14:54
  Anyway, so yeah. Keep yourselves free guys, it
• 1:14:56
  will be a really amazing and exciting conference.
• 1:15:00
  Bro what's going on with spider man?
• 1:15:02
  Subscribe. And on that note.