Latest / Hoppe Radio (Hoppe Hour) With Ryan Hoppe / The Hammerin Hank Show With Henry Ochs & Ryan Hoppe: Episode 64

Transcript

The Hammerin Hank Show With Henry Ochs & Ryan Hoppe: Episode 64 · Hoppe Radio (Hoppe Hour) With Ryan Hoppe

• 0:00
  What up, Hank? If I hit the button. How the fuck
• 0:02
  are you doing, buddy? I'm doing pretty fucking
• 0:05
  good. If I hit the button and the music, which
• 0:08
  you can't hear, but you'll hear afterwards, would
• 0:11
  you be ready to start the show? Yeah. All right.
• 0:15
  I love your energy. All right. One second. You're
• 0:17
  listening to The Hammer and Hank Show with Henry
• 0:20
  Oaks and Ryan Hoppy. Legend on the air, waist
• 0:36
  free. Autistic ping -pang, Cali's hard OG. Wild
• 0:39
  949, he the voice they need. Doghouse days, laying
• 0:43
  down the cream. Too legit to quit, Hammond and
• 0:45
  Hank on fire. Mike in hand, lifeline and wire.
• 0:49
  Radio beast ain't showing no tire. Underdog champion,
• 0:53
  always going higher. What up, Hank? How you doing,
• 0:57
  buddy? Doing good, how are you? Extremely good.
• 1:03
  How you been? I just had a Diet Coke. Oh, yeah.
• 1:06
  I'm pretty hyper, too. So, do you have your Diet
• 1:11
  Coke next to you? No. Well, I got my Celsius
• 1:15
  here. Let me stand up and grab it. Let me drink
• 1:19
  a little bit of it. For people that want to see
• 1:22
  what I look like, on my Instagram, I'm going
• 1:24
  to post a picture after the show's done, which
• 1:25
  it'll already be done by the time this is up,
• 1:27
  of me and my cat and Hank. Boy, does she not
• 1:30
  like pictures. I swear that cat likes me, but
• 1:32
  Jesus Christ, Hank. She doesn't know how to pose.
• 1:38
  Anyway, let me take a sip of this Celsius, even
• 1:39
  though I don't need any more. How's your week
• 1:44
  been? What you been up to? What's been happening?
• 1:46
  Pretty good. What you been doing? I thought about
• 1:51
  going to the Giants game, but I decided not to.
• 1:54
  Yeah, let's talk about this. I found this fascinating.
• 1:58
  So you, we're going to go, because we're going
• 2:01
  to start from the beginning, which is always
• 2:03
  the best way to begin. So you were going to go
• 2:06
  to the San Francisco Giants game. Yep. And it
• 2:11
  was Saturday at 1 o 'clock, and you said, What
• 2:18
  time on Saturday did you decide, you didn't want
• 2:21
  to go? About 7 o 'clock. In the morning? Yes.
• 2:27
  What was your decision? Because people behind
• 2:32
  me were talking too much. Yeah, when you talked
• 2:35
  to me, people were bothering me. I thought you
• 2:37
  meant people were beating you up. I was like,
• 2:39
  if some are not beating you up, make some making
• 2:40
  fun of you. I was about to say, if somebody is
• 2:43
  out there fucking with Hank, I'll beat your ass.
• 2:46
  Not really. I'll bring my back, but I'll try.
• 2:48
  Hank, I think maybe I have an idea for you next
• 2:52
  time. What's the radio station? Is it KNBR that
• 2:57
  airs the Jets? Yes. Why don't you listen to the
• 3:01
  KNBR stream? Because. Do you have a great papa?
• 3:14
  He's actually rather listening to music anytime
• 3:16
  now. We just got a message from our manager.
• 3:24
  So when are you guys going to do a video and
• 3:26
  not just audio? Hank, if you don't want to be
• 3:29
  on camera, that's fine. Do you want to be on
• 3:31
  camera? Yes. I don't want to be on camera, so
• 3:35
  we'll figure out some situation where you're
• 3:39
  on camera and I'm not, okay? Okay. I don't understand
• 3:43
  video. I'm an old school guy, dude. We came,
• 3:49
  my voice is cracked, but we're from kind of the
• 3:52
  same area. Only I'm a little bit younger, but
• 3:53
  like 25 years. But Hank, like, do you like video?
• 3:57
  Do you just want to do audio if you had a choice?
• 4:01
  I just do audio. Me too. I do podcasting. Speaking
• 4:05
  of audio. Ah, Hank. What is your radio memory
• 4:10
  of the day? When I visited Old School 1079 in
• 4:15
  Great Bank, Kansas to record my first ever on
• 4:19
  -system awareness PSA. Mm -hmm. What year was
• 4:24
  that? It was in 2016. Mm -hmm. How long did it
• 4:32
  take you? 10 minutes And we have it right here
• 4:39
  People of autism are often treated like they
• 4:42
  are different. Believe me, we are. Hi, this is
• 4:46
  Henry Oaks, but my buddies may have known me
• 4:48
  as Hammer and Hank. I was labeled as slow when
• 4:51
  I started school. Come to find out at the age
• 4:54
  of 12, the doctors decided I was autistic. Now
• 4:57
  at the age of 48, I have completed an associate
• 4:59
  degree in radio broadcasting and worked in the
• 5:02
  San Francisco Bay Area as an on -air personality.
• 5:05
  So yes, I am different. People of autism have
• 5:08
  no needs. No different than you. Laugh, laugh,
• 5:12
  love, and learn to gain education and join the
• 5:15
  workforce. I did it, and so can anyone else of
• 5:19
  autism. You're listening to The Hammer and Hank
• 5:22
  Show with Henry Oaks and Ryan Hopp. Oh, yeah,
• 5:29
  Hank does a good job. Thank you, buddy. by the
• 5:36
  Kansas Association of Broadcasters that year,
• 5:39
  but it didn't win the prize. But I'm happy just
• 5:42
  with the nomination. That's good. That's a good
• 5:45
  way to look at it. Ah, Hanky. What is your Woody
• 5:51
  Show update? I'm supposed to record a bit for
• 5:56
  the Woody Show hopefully tomorrow. That's the
• 5:59
  update. Yep. Tell Jeff Fyfe and Jason McMurray
• 6:04
  I said hi. That's Madison Woody's name. Anyway.
• 6:11
  Hammer and Hank, what is your update on dating
• 6:13
  him? Talk to my sister about it, but she'll probably
• 6:19
  say no. No! Did you talk to Smurfette yet? No,
• 6:26
  not yet. Why do you have to tell her you're a
• 6:28
  50 -whatever -year -old man? Yep. Just say you're
• 6:34
  going to record an autism PSA, bring a condom,
• 6:37
  and bang your girl out. Okay. No, but seriously,
• 6:42
  dude. I think you deserve love. You know, you're
• 6:46
  like so high -functioning autistic, I forget
• 6:49
  you're autistic. You know what I mean? Dude,
• 6:51
  you're fine. You're fine. I think you need love.
• 6:56
  Can you tell I got laid the last three days?
• 6:58
  I got that little pep in my step. What? Never
• 7:03
  mind. I haven't... You jerked off to a freestyle
• 7:07
  artist in the 1980s. So you jerked off, you masturbated,
• 7:12
  you choked a chicken to freestyle music from
• 7:14
  the 80s? Yeah, Lisa Lisa. Oh, yeah! That's what
• 7:19
  you were saying when you reached the top of the
• 7:21
  mountain. That's the most hammering Hank thing
• 7:23
  I've ever heard. Because I wish I could see her
• 7:28
  in concert. Yeah. You would have to go to the
• 7:32
  bathroom multiple times to jerk off because you
• 7:35
  can't do it in public. Right. Hank, what are
• 7:41
  some sporting events that should be played on
• 7:43
  major holidays? Christmas. They should play the
• 7:49
  NBA and NFL on Christmas. Don't they? They already
• 7:55
  do, but... My team isn't playing this year. But
• 8:01
  that still means they're playing. It's just not
• 8:03
  your team. Your teams are Chiefs, right? Yep.
• 8:06
  The Chiefs aren't playing just to stay this year.
• 8:08
  You're not a fan of the 41ers. I'm not a fan
• 8:13
  of the 41ers at all. I love when you say 41ers.
• 8:17
  It's adorable. It's adorable. Hammer and Hank,
• 8:20
  I want to ask you. If you were to get a high...
• 8:25
  What ass Latina girlfriend to sit on your lap?
• 8:30
  How long would you last? Freestyle explosion
• 8:33
  concert. Yeah, you know, you got a girl over
• 8:35
  here at Barbie and you're playing some of the
• 8:37
  freestyle music? Yeah. Would you turn on Super
• 8:42
  Kitties? Maybe. Yeah. That's what a girl wants
• 8:48
  to watch, Super Kitties. Have you ever had a
• 8:51
  girl hit on you? Yes. Oh, yeah. I got my fucking
• 8:58
  dick sucked at the sound factory way back in
• 9:01
  1998. You're the best. My buddy Jose hooked it
• 9:06
  up. Oh, yeah. Jose went down on you? I'm kidding.
• 9:10
  I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Oh, the 90s in San
• 9:15
  Francisco was wild. I tell you. You know what
• 9:19
  else is wild? Everyone. on the show. We like
• 9:22
  to make people laugh. I like to think that our
• 9:25
  off -the -cuff style is pretty funny. But the
• 9:27
  thing is, we also have the jokes. If I hit the
• 9:31
  music, Hank, would you be ready for the jokes?
• 9:35
  Yeah. Why did I bring a ladder to work? Why did
• 10:05
  you bring a ladder to work? Because I heard the
• 10:08
  pay was going up. Not in real. Why did I put
• 10:13
  my money in the freezer? Why? Because I was a
• 10:18
  cold hard cash. Why did I bring a spoon to the
• 10:24
  computer? Why? Because I heard it had cookies.
• 10:31
  Mm -hmm. Why don't I trust the stairs? Why? Because
• 10:36
  they're always up to something. Mm -hmm. Why
• 10:40
  did I take a nap at the bank? Why? Because I
• 10:44
  need to check my balance. Why did I bring a flashlight
• 10:50
  to the restaurant? Why? Because I wanted the
• 10:53
  light meal. Why? My phone in an airplane mode.
• 11:00
  Why? Because they wanted to take me on vacation.
• 11:07
  Hey, we've been recording for 11 minutes and
• 11:09
  11 seconds. Make a wish. Whoa. All right, that
• 11:14
  was not a wish. Next. Why did I bring calendar
• 11:18
  to dinner? Why? Because I wanted a date. Why
• 11:25
  did I get fired from the O2 factory? Layoffs.
• 11:29
  Because I couldn't concentrate. Why did I bring
• 11:34
  it back to the grocery store? Why? Because the
• 11:37
  prices were way too high. That's the joke for
• 11:41
  this week. Hank, let me hit the music for trivia,
• 11:45
  okay? Okay. Okay. Turn on the show with him.
• 12:00
  My mind's sharp like a blade that's flying. They
• 12:02
  asking those questions, got my brain frying.
• 12:04
  Hammer and Hanks got the mic up high. Pop hits
• 12:07
  playing to the end of the sky. Gotta keep it
• 12:10
  real, can't let it slide. Answers in my head,
• 12:13
  can't let them hide. Pop trivia. All right, what
• 12:16
  do you got? What a big freestyle record. I'm
• 12:21
  worried if I could take you home. Back in the
• 12:25
  late 80s. I don't know, Madonna. No, Lisa Lisa.
• 12:30
  I should have guessed it. Next. The Top Ten Hate
• 12:37
  Records. I think we're alone now. Back in 1988.
• 12:42
  No, no. Let me guess. Cher. No, Tiffany. I don't
• 12:51
  know my freestyle artist. Next. That's it for
• 12:55
  the... Trivia for this week. All right. Listener
• 12:59
  comment here. Hank, I've been listening to you
• 13:01
  for 30 years, and I'm proud of you. Keep off
• 13:04
  the good work. There you go. Hey, buddy. That
• 13:08
  was from Lisa Lisa. No, it was from someone in
• 13:11
  San Francisco that commented on our page. All
• 13:13
  right, Hank. One second. Hey, people can leave
• 13:15
  us a voicemail at 856 -49 -HOPPY. That's 856
• 13:18
  -494 -6773. All right, Hank. You can follow us
• 13:22
  on Instagram at DJHammerHank. What music do you
• 13:28
  think I have? Church music. Hell yeah! Tell us
• 13:32
  about church. I didn't go this past Sunday because
• 13:38
  of the outdoor service. You didn't want to be
• 13:41
  outside? Nope. Too hot? Nope, because we didn't
• 13:48
  have lawn chairs. What? Okay. What did you do
• 13:52
  instead? We went to the Normans in Castro Valley.
• 13:57
  You got lunch, right? Breakfast? I had breakfast.
• 14:01
  Did you pray before the meal? No, we don't. My
• 14:06
  aunt did that at Texas Roadhouse. It was adorable.
• 14:09
  Because I had omelet and toast off the senior
• 14:14
  menu. Was it good? Very good, buddy. All right,
• 14:19
  let's keep the positive vibes going. If I hit
• 14:22
  the music, you ready for Buddy of the Week? Yes.
• 14:28
  Oh, Chase. Yo. Tune in to the show. It's Hammer
• 14:34
  and Hank. Autistic genius always keeping it dang.
• 14:37
  Henry Oaks on the mic. I got it. Riding shotgun.
• 14:40
  Roll call. Buddy of the Week. Get the crown.
• 14:45
  Hank brings fouls. Shut the haters down. On the
• 14:49
  airwaves. Hey, good year. How excited are you?
• 15:12
  I said, how excited are you? Extremely excited,
• 15:16
  buddy. On a scale of one to ten. Eleven. Yeah!
• 15:23
  Any other buddies? Not this week. You got a prick?
• 15:30
  If I had a prick in the news, you got a prick?
• 15:33
  I have a prick this week. Oh, you had a prick
• 15:35
  in the news as the prep. My prick in the news.
• 15:40
  I'm going to do it. My prick in the news is any
• 15:45
  radio CEO. Now, if you're going to lay people
• 15:49
  off and fire people and format change and blah,
• 15:52
  blah, blah, that's fine. But then if you complain
• 15:55
  about why radio's dying, I don't want to hear
• 15:58
  you say jack shit. Okay? Any comment to that,
• 16:03
  Hank? Well, there was a person on the website
• 16:08
  Radio Discussions who had the screen name Diane
• 16:12
  Medium. Was that you? Nope. That's a very interesting
• 16:18
  contribution. I never know you. Hank, you got
• 16:21
  anything else? What? That's it. That's it for
• 16:29
  this week. Let's get it started. Let's get it
• 16:36
  started. Actually, it'd be, let's get it over
• 16:39
  with. All right, Hank. Let's figure this out
• 16:44
  here. Let's record Friday. This has been episode
• 16:55
  64. This show is older than you now. you so much,
• 17:06
  and I'll hope to see you again this Friday. Peace
• 17:09
  in your hood. Love you, Hank. Love you. Peace
• 17:13
  in your hood. Bye, buddy. And there he goes on
• 17:17
  Zoom. Ha. Yeah. Yo. Yo. Yo. Yo. Mike Crackle.
• 17:29
  Hammering Hank on the tackle. Autistic mind sharper
• 17:32
  than a bone -chilling shackle. Henry... with
• 17:34
  the hops Ryan hop in the spot radio waves hitting
• 17:37
  hard like a chef with the pot farewell hammering
• 17:40
  Hank gotta close up the show legend in the booth
• 17:42
  where the vibes used to flow autism warrior always
• 17:45
  running the glow but all good things gotta let
• 17:48
  the curtain go slow on the dial spitting truth
• 17:50
  with his unique grind thoughts intertwined like
• 17:53
  graffiti on the line Ryan on the mic Henry's
• 17:56
  rhythm divine they the blueprint every beat they
• 17:59
  design static in the speakers where the laughter
• 18:01
  used to ride Hank led the show with that beautiful
• 18:04
  pride. Autism didn't stop him, not amplified.
• 18:07
  Hammer and Hank, forever immortalized. Farewell,
• 18:10
  Hammer and Hank, gotta close up the show. Legend
• 18:13
  in the booth where the vibes used to flow. Autism
• 18:16
  warrior, always running the glow. But all good
• 18:18
  things gotta let the curtain go slow. Radio go,
• 18:21
  never ghost. He a host with the sauce. Henry
• 18:23
  Oaks and Reinhardt, lightning never lost. Puzzle
• 18:26
  piece crown, man, this dude was the boss. City
• 18:28
  missed the voice, that's the ultimate cause.
• 19:01
  Farewell Hammer and Hank Gotta close up the show
• 19:04
  Legend in the booth Where the vibes used to flow
• 19:06
  Autism warrior Always running the glow But all
• 19:09
  good things Gotta let the curtain go slow Radio
• 19:22
  Gate never ghost He a host with the sauce Henry
• 19:25
  Oaks and Ryan Harp Lightning never lost Puzzle
• 19:27
  piece crown Man this dude was the boss The ultimate
• 19:31
  cost. Ryan Hoppe here, and I want to tell you
• 19:53
  about the Ride the Wave Media Podcast Network.
• 19:57
  They got such great shows. It's Practically Magic,
• 20:00
  Those Guys, Blaine's World, and even my show,
• 20:03
  Hoppe Hour with Ryan Hoppe, which can be heard
• 20:06
  by searching Hoppe Radio. This podcast network
• 20:09
  is going to take over the world. It is everything
• 20:13
  that radio is missing. Now, you're hearing my
• 20:15
  voice, and you go, how can I find it? RideTheWave
• 20:19
  .media is the website name. And there has all
• 20:22
  the great podcasts. And once again, this is Ryan
• 20:25
  Hoppe from the Ride the Wave Media Podcast. Hey,
• 20:31
  what's up, guys? It's Ryan Hoppe here. I host
• 20:33
  the award -winning and nationally syndicated
• 20:36
  Hoppe Hour podcast, but I'm not bragging. It's
• 20:40
  a mix of a 2000s, 1990s morning show in a podcast
• 20:43
  format. You never know what I might talk about.
• 20:46
  One minute I could be talking about the latest
• 20:49
  with the NFL side chicks, and the very next second
• 20:52
  I could be playing an unknown song from the 2000s.
• 20:56
  My show is an in -studio circus. for the age
• 21:00
  group of 18 to 34, even though we have 70 -year
• 21:03
  -olds that listen. For more info, if you want
• 21:06
  to be a sponsor, a friend, and no, not a drinking
• 21:09
  sponsor, a sponsor of the show of Hoppy Hour,
• 21:12
  go to ridethewave .media is the website, and
• 21:17
  ryanhoppyradio at gmail .com. Once again, this
• 21:21
  is Ryan Hoppy of the Hoppy Hour podcast, and
• 21:25
  let's do some business. I don't know.