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On The Love Boat with Below Deck Med Star Captain Sandy and Her Wife Leah · Pursuit of Sassiness

• 0:15
  Speaker 1: Hey there, folks, say, welcome to I Do Part two
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: and if you got love right the first time around,
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: this show ain't for you. Welcome. I'm TJ. Holmes alongside
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: my dear lovely, my fiance and my co host on
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: this show. It's Amy Roboch and we are we are
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: losing it a little bit on this one because we
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: have a couple of guests since Studio one we are
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: very familiar with one we just met now the one
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: we're very familiar with, Robes is that this goes beyond
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: just being a fan of the show.
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: Oh Captain Sandy and below Deck got us through some
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: of the darkest times of our lives. That's when we
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: were hiding out from the world literally and had nowhere
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: to go. You know where we turned to super honest,
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: I am telling you. We go back and we think
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: of the show, and we think of the episodes, and
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: as we watch new ones, we remember how much your
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: show literally helped us escape our own tumult and for
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: that we are grateful.
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: Thank you. It's a great show, right, It's amazing show.
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: Yes, all the places you can be, but all the
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: drama that ensues, but all the fun that's had in
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: the process.
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: But we are joining. This is I Do Part two. Now,
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: this is just regular Amy and TJ podcast. We would
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: just be talking to Captain Sandy. No, no, no, no, we're talking
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: relationships here on I Do Part two and you are
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: sitting here. We are all sitting in studio together. You
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: here with your wife of two years. Now. Yeah, Leah,
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: it is so good to meet you.
• 1:48
  Speaker 4: Thank you.
• 1:48
  Speaker 5: Nice to be here two years.
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: When was the anniversary?
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: Now?
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: I want to get it right. Just had it right,
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: do you know?
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: Yeah? I love it.
• 1:53
  Speaker 5: Good job.
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, wait a minute, that that didn't come from nowhere.
• 2:00
  Speaker 5: But we've been together seven years?
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: Okay? Is she not good with dates? Usually?
• 2:04
  Speaker 5: Amazing?
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: Okay, I mean she's a captain. I would think numbers
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: like precision are kind of really important with the jobs directions.
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: I know where we park her car.
• 2:14
  Speaker 5: I did do the wedding. Yeah, yeah, she just showed
• 2:17
  Speaker 5: up for the wedding.
• 2:18
  Speaker 3: I did all that.
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: That's amazing. I mean, you have to have a planner
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: and you have to have an executor.
• 2:23
  Speaker 3: The two together work perfectly.
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: Happy Pride Month, by the way, you New York obviously
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: knows how to do it right. Any plans to celebrate
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: do you guys get into all of the festivities and celebrations.
• 2:36
  Speaker 4: Right, I mean, we keep to ourselves a lot. We
• 2:40
  Speaker 4: have a very tight group of people that we hang
• 2:42
  Speaker 4: out with, so we like nice dinners, We love the
• 2:44
  Speaker 4: shop and.
• 2:46
  Speaker 6: I did a Bravo Pride float.
• 2:54
  Speaker 3: Float.
• 2:54
  Speaker 6: And I think when we show up in life together
• 2:57
  Speaker 6: and hold hands, we're showing everyone it's like to be
• 3:00
  Speaker 6: in a stance.
• 3:01
  Speaker 5: Yes, absolutely, that's not That is cool.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: You can you can send a message without saying a word.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: We always think that you all probably do. You probably
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: get it sometimes to worry. Why don't you do this more?
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: Say this more? And why isn't this enough you? That's
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: a very good point and worth wanting us living our lives.
• 3:18
  Speaker 6: Ye, loving each other exactly, no judgment and just you know,
• 3:22
  Speaker 6: we're two normal people that happen to be in love.
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: It's two souls.
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: Yes, Oh, I mean look in here in New York City. Obviously,
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: this is a city that embraces all kinds of love.
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: Whatever it looks like, however it manifests. How is it
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: for you all in I don't know where we're I
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: don't know if you want to even say where you
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: live or where you reside. But have you ever felt
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: uncomfortable or discomfort holding hands in public, showing affection in public?
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: Or is that in years past and today things are good.
• 3:51
  Speaker 4: I mean, I'm just aware, like I always say, read
• 3:54
  Speaker 4: the room, you know, to be honest with you. I
• 3:56
  Speaker 4: come from a very conservative family. I was a gospel
• 3:58
  Speaker 4: singer for thirty years, worship leader, and so I came
• 4:01
  Speaker 4: from the Christian industry. I lost my career when I
• 4:04
  Speaker 4: came out actually overnight. So I mean, I'm aware that
• 4:08
  Speaker 4: we're not going to like make out in a very
• 4:11
  Speaker 4: conservative you know room, and then when we walk the streets,
• 4:14
  Speaker 4: I'll grab our Hannah shall hold my hand.
• 4:16
  Speaker 5: So you know we're respectful, you know, I feel that.
• 4:23
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yes, But there's no weirdness or anything where
• 4:27
  Speaker 4: we live. I mean, you know, if they have a
• 4:30
  Speaker 4: problem with it, it's their problem.
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: One of the two of you more naturally affectionate than
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: the other.
• 4:35
  Speaker 5: Though we're all over each other. We are too, by
• 4:39
  Speaker 5: the way, Yeah.
• 4:41
  Speaker 6: We're in Yeah, so that you know touches love right,
• 4:45
  Speaker 6: So I don't know. I to me, it's like I
• 4:47
  Speaker 6: want to know my person loves me, and I want
• 4:50
  Speaker 6: them to know I love them.
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, physical touch is important everything. We've actually had some
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: stuff said about us because they said we were overly affectionate,
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: which was completely embellished. But yes, we also understand you
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: have to read the room. So you all met through
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: social media. Can you tell me how you all met
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: and how it all, how the romance all began?
• 5:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah, no, I mean, I mean I turned on the show.
• 5:11
  Speaker 4: I didn't really watch the show a lot, and I thought, oh,
• 5:14
  Speaker 4: she's hot. I'm just going to message and be like hey,
• 5:18
  Speaker 4: and so I said many blessings, congrats on your show,
• 5:21
  Speaker 4: and that was it. And then six months later.
• 5:23
  Speaker 3: You reached back messages.
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: These are dms. Damn, I'm the same way. I'll be like,
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: oh my god. Six months of messaging so you finally see.
• 5:31
  Speaker 6: Yes, and her stood out because it said many blessings.
• 5:34
  Speaker 6: And then I clicked on a link and she was
• 5:36
  Speaker 6: singing and I was like, wow, she can sing.
• 5:40
  Speaker 3: And then we reached out and then we.
• 5:42
  Speaker 5: Met in La. Yeah, it was love at first sight.
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: Okay, oh right, I have so many questions. Yeah, this story, Now,
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: how much time you saw it? After six months you
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: saw the message, but then how long between writing her
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: bag that you will actually see each other.
• 5:59
  Speaker 3: Wow.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: So, yeah, in La? And what was that in La? Okay?
• 6:04
  Speaker 6: And she was in Colorado, Okay. And she was coming
• 6:07
  Speaker 6: to visit family in La or Orange County somewhere.
• 6:11
  Speaker 5: I'm from Orange County in California.
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: We met how that first meeting date? What was it?
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: Well?
• 6:16
  Speaker 3: I asked her if she wanted to go to the
• 6:17
  Speaker 3: movies at ten o'clock at night.
• 6:18
  Speaker 4: She was so nervous. It was so cute. She's like,
• 6:21
  Speaker 4: you want to go buy a chicken?
• 6:23
  Speaker 3: Chicken?
• 6:26
  Speaker 5: You want to go see the Queens? Is so cute?
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: Go see what movie was it?
• 6:30
  Speaker 5: I don't know. It was like that Queen's movie.
• 6:32
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, And I'm like, movie, oh yeah.
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: You go to a movie that night?
• 6:38
  Speaker 5: It's no, we know.
• 6:40
  Speaker 3: We went to Bristol Farms.
• 6:41
  Speaker 5: Then she does walk.
• 6:46
  Speaker 4: Really fast and I'm in my high heels and I'm like,
• 6:48
  Speaker 4: I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm trying to keep up.
• 6:50
  Speaker 5: It was cute.
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: So how do things progress? How did you get from
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: there to being married now? Like you said, seven years ago, though.
• 6:56
  Speaker 6: Conversations, talking, communicating, just stay in touch and realizing this
• 7:02
  Speaker 6: was love.
• 7:03
  Speaker 5: Yeah, it was fast. I mean it was pretty fast.
• 7:06
  Speaker 5: I'm not going to lie.
• 7:07
  Speaker 3: I mean it wasn't a U haul it it.
• 7:09
  Speaker 5: Was a writer trap.
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: It's amazing.
• 7:13
  Speaker 5: Yeah, we literally drove from La through all the way
• 7:18
  Speaker 5: to Colorado because that's where I lived at the time.
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: I'm laughing because I only understand that joke recently, because
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: I explained though U hal.
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: Lesbians fall in love, they want to move in right away.
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: They get the U haul after the first date and
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: wahla writer Leah, you were married before for twenty years
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: to a man. Yes, So what were you looking for?
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: Did you think you could find love again? Were you
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: on a mission to find love?
• 7:47
  Speaker 4: I was so sad and felt so trapped, and because
• 7:51
  Speaker 4: I was a gospel artist, it was like couples that
• 7:54
  Speaker 4: pray together stay together. And I thought, this is just
• 7:57
  Speaker 4: torture to me. And I have adopted a daughter at
• 8:01
  Speaker 4: birth and she was beautiful. She's twenty now, but I
• 8:05
  Speaker 4: had to stay in Colorado and raise her. So I
• 8:07
  Speaker 4: told Sandy, I can't move back to California. I need
• 8:10
  Speaker 4: to put my daughter first. I need to I can't
• 8:13
  Speaker 4: take her from her friends and get her through school.
• 8:15
  Speaker 4: And then so she said, I'm gonna I'm gonna move
• 8:18
  Speaker 4: to Colorado and I'm like, what, you're going to move
• 8:21
  Speaker 4: to Colorado? There's no water, really, there's no boats.
• 8:25
  Speaker 5: And she did.
• 8:27
  Speaker 4: She came and lasted five years. But yeah, I mean
• 8:30
  Speaker 4: I came out to my husband at the time and
• 8:33
  Speaker 4: just said I'm not happy and this is why, and
• 8:36
  Speaker 4: we need to divorce, you know, and he did not easy.
• 8:41
  Speaker 5: It was terrible. Yeah, it was the worst.
• 8:43
  Speaker 4: It was the worst time in my life because I
• 8:46
  Speaker 4: lost my identity. I had to start over. I was
• 8:50
  Speaker 4: crucified by the church and front lost friends and it
• 8:54
  Speaker 4: was horrible for me anyway.
• 8:57
  Speaker 5: So she was supportive.
• 8:58
  Speaker 6: But then she moved out of her big house because
• 9:01
  Speaker 6: this is when you know, it's like real, right, it
• 9:03
  Speaker 6: moves into this apartment and I'll never forget. We drove
• 9:06
  Speaker 6: up and she just cried and I'm like, it's only
• 9:08
  Speaker 6: temporary because she had a big house, a big life,
• 9:12
  Speaker 6: obviously a big career. She lost everything, and now she's
• 9:15
  Speaker 6: moving into an apartment that you would move into after
• 9:18
  Speaker 6: you graduate college.
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: The apartment after a divorce is almost always sad. Mine
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: was your kind of was. Yes, we know that feeling.
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: That's a huge adjustment, huge on every level, every level.
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: And your kids are adjusting too. At the same time, How.
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: Did your daughter here?
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: She?
• 9:35
  Speaker 4: I mean, I took her from her childhood home into
• 9:38
  Speaker 4: this apartment, and so she's she's dogs and I had
• 9:41
  Speaker 4: two dogs who were used to running on five acres,
• 9:43
  Speaker 4: so they're like pooping pean on the floor.
• 9:45
  Speaker 5: I'm like, oh my god, this is like a nightmare.
• 9:48
  Speaker 5: But it was good. We got through it.
• 9:50
  Speaker 4: And then one day it was snowing in Colorado and
• 9:53
  Speaker 4: I'm in my uggs and I'm driving her to school,
• 9:56
  Speaker 4: and I drive by townhouses for sale and I go
• 10:00
  Speaker 4: and I go in, I put a deposit down on
• 10:02
  Speaker 4: a piece of property and I buy my first townhouse. So,
• 10:06
  Speaker 4: like I said, I was married twenty years before, so
• 10:09
  Speaker 4: he was the provider and did everything. So I had
• 10:12
  Speaker 4: to like relearn everything in life, you know.
• 10:14
  Speaker 3: And because you've been a great gospel career.
• 10:17
  Speaker 5: Because my gospel career, yeah, you know.
• 10:19
  Speaker 4: But now I'm in the beauty industry and I love
• 10:21
  Speaker 4: it and I'm launching my own product and it's just
• 10:23
  Speaker 4: been I'm happier now in my life than I ever was,
• 10:27
  Speaker 4: and I'm so in love and it's just I have
• 10:30
  Speaker 4: a new family and it's great.
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: This, I guess is it's adjacent, but a little off topic.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: I'm just curious. I have those folks who pushed you
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: out in the church and all these soil have has
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: that softened any and been welcomed back, have any of
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: those relationships.
• 10:56
  Speaker 4: It's interesting that some of them have come out to
• 10:59
  Speaker 4: me and said, hey, I'm sorry that I wasn't there
• 11:04
  Speaker 4: for you. I'm struggling too, And I go, yeah, that's
• 11:07
  Speaker 4: all good. You know. Actually my daughter came out to
• 11:09
  Speaker 4: me that she's gay, and I thought, oh my gosh,
• 11:13
  Speaker 4: like I thought, like I ruined her or I you
• 11:18
  Speaker 4: know what I mean, like it was and she's living
• 11:20
  Speaker 4: her authentic life.
• 11:21
  Speaker 5: I'm living my authentic life.
• 11:23
  Speaker 4: I've forgiven the people who cast me aside. Most of
• 11:27
  Speaker 4: them are closet something you know, in the churches. So
• 11:32
  Speaker 4: it's hard. But it's hard for me to go to
• 11:34
  Speaker 4: church now. I mean I miss it, but to think
• 11:38
  Speaker 4: I'm not allowed to be on the platform, like it's
• 11:40
  Speaker 4: just a trigger. So I just don't really go to church.
• 11:43
  Speaker 3: Because God loves all of us just.
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: What we were told.
• 11:47
  Speaker 5: Yes, that's what we're told.
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: What Jesus do, not what a lot of churches do
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: when they see something that they don't think fits their something.
• 11:57
  Speaker 6: Yeah, wise she goes when the church fails, that's because
• 12:00
  Speaker 6: the people worship.
• 12:01
  Speaker 5: The man and not Yes, for sure, that church.
• 12:03
  Speaker 3: Should never fail.
• 12:04
  Speaker 6: And so basically it's like it's so stupid and I
• 12:08
  Speaker 6: I just it's like, it's love period.
• 12:11
  Speaker 3: Forget it. Don't think about sex. Why do people got
• 12:13
  Speaker 3: to go there?
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: Like, right, that's such a good way to look at it. Yes,
• 12:17
  Speaker 2: it's about love. It's not about the sexual act. That's
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: just what happens when you express your love talking about
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: who you love. Sandy, this was your this is your
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: first marriage. Correct, So did you feel any reservation? Did
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: you think marriage was in the cards? And once you
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: get to a certain point you might find that.
• 12:33
  Speaker 3: Leah, really yes, I was like I'm going.
• 12:36
  Speaker 5: To marry her, Yeah, instantly.
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: And you've never thought that before?
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: No?
• 12:40
  Speaker 3: Wow, really I just didn't think.
• 12:43
  Speaker 6: You know, it wasn't really a thing, you know, obviously,
• 12:47
  Speaker 6: I just love the person I love and I was like,
• 12:50
  Speaker 6: why do we need to get married?
• 12:51
  Speaker 3: Now? I know why? Wow?
• 12:54
  Speaker 5: Yeah? I took her name and everything. Yeah, it was
• 12:56
  Speaker 5: so cute. Though.
• 12:57
  Speaker 4: She brought me, bought me a promise ring. I was like,
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: promise ring, I want, I want the real.
• 13:03
  Speaker 5: Ring you got me. Yeah, it was a Tiffany and
• 13:09
  Speaker 5: surprised me in Great Greece.
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, oh, Cindy.
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: I think it's so cool too, because I think the
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: part of the podcast is that either you've you've you've
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: tried something it didn't work, and people really do lose hope.
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: I think when you lose hope, that's that's just that
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: dark place that I think many of us have been in.
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: What would you say to anyone who's out there thinking
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: I'm past my prime? Who's gonna want this? You know,
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: I've waited too long? What hope is there?
• 13:34
  Speaker 6: Who you live in your life for? You live in
• 13:37
  Speaker 6: it for everybody else or yourself. That's what I say, Like,
• 13:40
  Speaker 6: live your life for yourself. Obviously, be kind and do
• 13:43
  Speaker 6: the next right thing, but don't base your decisions based
• 13:46
  Speaker 6: on what other people think about you or what you're
• 13:48
  Speaker 6: afraid they're gonna they're gonna judge. You live your life
• 13:51
  Speaker 6: because you're living it truly, and that's love.
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, absolutely, yeah, I wish well. I think maybe on
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: social people can see how the two of you look
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: at each other. It's really beautiful to know that you've
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: been together for seven years and you still look at
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: each other that way. That's pretty cool. You this is
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: a long distance relationship though. I mean, obviously, Captain Sandy,
• 14:12
  Speaker 2: we watch you traveling the world in the most beautiful,
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: amazing places, but very far away from Leah.
• 14:18
  Speaker 3: How do you all manage that face?
• 14:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah, FaceTime, it comes over. Yeah, I go at the end.
• 14:26
  Speaker 4: But we're both you know, independent entrepreneur you know, entrepreneurial women,
• 14:31
  Speaker 4: and so you know, I'm focusing on my business, and
• 14:33
  Speaker 4: I have my daughter that comes and visits and stuff, and.
• 14:36
  Speaker 3: Then I come over and see her, have my family.
• 14:39
  Speaker 4: And my fam our families in Jacksonville. You know, our sister,
• 14:42
  Speaker 4: my sister in law, Michelle Dunham. She's amazing, and so
• 14:46
  Speaker 4: it's great. I mean, we have such a great community.
• 14:48
  Speaker 3: I'm not gone that long.
• 14:50
  Speaker 5: A couple of months, yeah, yeah, I was just too bad.
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: How does it work in a twelve month period? How much?
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: How often are you?
• 14:56
  Speaker 6: Like, if it wasn't for Bravo or Blowdeck, I would
• 14:58
  Speaker 6: be gone a long time.
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: You know.
• 15:01
  Speaker 6: Back in the day when I started, I was gone
• 15:03
  Speaker 6: all year. I didn't see my family for years, like
• 15:05
  Speaker 6: it was rare.
• 15:06
  Speaker 5: It's not like that now.
• 15:07
  Speaker 6: No, the industry has changed, like it's three months on,
• 15:10
  Speaker 6: three months off.
• 15:11
  Speaker 3: The bigger boats. The boats are getting bigger. The crew.
• 15:13
  Speaker 3: If you want quality crew, you better let.
• 15:15
  Speaker 6: Them have a life. And back in the day when
• 15:18
  Speaker 6: I started, we didn't have lives.
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 15:20
  Speaker 6: Right, So it's like your life was the boat life,
• 15:23
  Speaker 6: and now it's changed.
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: Cindy, do you think your love life got put on
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: hold because of the career you chose?
• 15:30
  Speaker 6: Of course, yeah. I mean it's so transient, you know.
• 15:33
  Speaker 6: But the great thing about this career, first of all,
• 15:36
  Speaker 6: there are plenty of jobs in the maritime industry. Secondly,
• 15:39
  Speaker 6: you travel the world and you meet some really interesting people. Thirdly,
• 15:43
  Speaker 6: your shoulder to shoulder with the billionaires you learn I
• 15:46
  Speaker 6: learned so much. Most of those conversations to their companies
• 15:50
  Speaker 6: happened on the bridge of the vessel. I learned a
• 15:52
  Speaker 6: lot from those billionaires. And you travel the world. But
• 15:57
  Speaker 6: at the same time you meet obviously, if you watch
• 16:00
  Speaker 6: below deck, that's how it is, you hook up, your break.
• 16:03
  Speaker 5: Up the net.
• 16:06
  Speaker 3: It's a boatman's So.
• 16:08
  Speaker 2: Did you have boat I was going to ask you,
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: did you ever mix business and pleasure?
• 16:12
  Speaker 6: Because I came up and yawning very differently where I
• 16:15
  Speaker 6: worked for one person and he taught me everything. I
• 16:18
  Speaker 6: went to c school, you know, I could save my
• 16:20
  Speaker 6: life like a lot of stuff engineering school. And then
• 16:24
  Speaker 6: I became a captain under him, so I never really
• 16:27
  Speaker 6: had to work like they did.
• 16:29
  Speaker 3: I was. I was the boat slave.
• 16:32
  Speaker 2: You bosin or that was the boat slave.
• 16:35
  Speaker 6: I send the chief stew the laundry girl, the dishwasher.
• 16:41
  Speaker 6: I was not the chef because Fran cooked, so she
• 16:44
  Speaker 6: just bought extra pots and pants so she didn't have
• 16:46
  Speaker 6: to watch those.
• 16:47
  Speaker 3: So they have it easier than I had it.
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: That makes sense, though, and that's why you feel comfortable
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: making the decisions you do on the show because you've
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: been there, done that.
• 16:55
  Speaker 6: Yes, And trust me, if they want to know what
• 16:58
  Speaker 6: hard work is like, come back to the day is
• 17:00
  Speaker 6: when I started both that's hard work.
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: And again you go back and watch these you don't
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: know a lot of what's going on in the drama
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: until you see it.
• 17:08
  Speaker 3: No, I want to.
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: But once you see it, why in God's name are
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: they doing? Are they just kids having fun and this
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: is gonna be over with and let them get it
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: out of their systems? Or do you see some real
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: relationship issues mistakes? Being made. Are they any real relationships?
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: Lessons to be taken out of what we see on
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: the show.
• 17:26
  Speaker 6: Some are in their twenties. When we were in our twenties,
• 17:29
  Speaker 6: I mean I was still using drugs. I got clean
• 17:31
  Speaker 6: at twenty five. But I mean, you know, they have
• 17:34
  Speaker 6: different backgrounds. They're from different nationalities, different religions, different beliefs.
• 17:41
  Speaker 6: So you think, Okay, I personally like to get to
• 17:44
  Speaker 6: know them, So I try to have a meal with them.
• 17:47
  Speaker 6: Do they have siblings and get to know them? Some
• 17:50
  Speaker 6: people have walls up, so you try. And then for
• 17:54
  Speaker 6: me it's I think it's I don't step in unless
• 17:58
  Speaker 6: they're starting to affect each other in their job situation.
• 18:02
  Speaker 6: When it starts permeating through the boat, that's when I
• 18:04
  Speaker 6: step in. When they're all talking about it, and now
• 18:07
  Speaker 6: if I can pick up on it, you know the
• 18:09
  Speaker 6: guests are going.
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: To pick up.
• 18:10
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 18:11
  Speaker 6: As far as they're interpersonal relationships, I don't live.
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: You know, I'm.
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: Curious being married did that change or affect you in
• 18:24
  Speaker 2: terms of how you captained your crew. Did having your
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: own deeply personal relationship impacted all what you thought of
• 18:33
  Speaker 2: things or how you viewed certain relationship issues.
• 18:36
  Speaker 3: Perhaps that were happening on the boat.
• 18:38
  Speaker 6: No, I worked to twelve steps, so I'm sober. And
• 18:42
  Speaker 6: the twelve steps I learned the design for life. Right,
• 18:45
  Speaker 6: I'm telling you that changes lives. And I I can
• 18:49
  Speaker 6: see where people need personal growth, right, So and I
• 18:52
  Speaker 6: need personal growth. Get into a relationship, you learn, right,
• 18:55
  Speaker 6: it's easy to have you know, kumbay a your whole
• 18:58
  Speaker 6: life if you're single. But the you get in a relationship,
• 19:01
  Speaker 6: you start working on yourself and you know that personal
• 19:05
  Speaker 6: growth is and it's all about communication. So they don't
• 19:08
  Speaker 6: have that. We do right because we're in relationships. We
• 19:11
  Speaker 6: learn how to communicate because we want it to work.
• 19:14
  Speaker 6: They're they're just hooking up. You know, I guarantee you
• 19:19
  Speaker 6: Joe isn't thinking about his wife and.
• 19:24
  Speaker 3: Material, don't you know.
• 19:27
  Speaker 6: With Nathan, obviously he loved Gail. That's his woman. That
• 19:32
  Speaker 6: is his wife, like well soon to be hopefully. You know,
• 19:35
  Speaker 6: they had a baby together. You look at you know,
• 19:37
  Speaker 6: look at Maliah. Let's take her like she her career
• 19:41
  Speaker 6: was yachting.
• 19:42
  Speaker 3: Yes, she hooked up and you know, yes, and she
• 19:45
  Speaker 3: was having fun. Yes, now she's a baby she had
• 19:48
  Speaker 3: you know, she's in love.
• 19:49
  Speaker 6: She was in brokerage, you know, so our charter management,
• 19:52
  Speaker 6: our charter brokerage. Yes, so everybody's got their different paths,
• 19:56
  Speaker 6: but I think of below Jack, I think they're just
• 20:00
  Speaker 6: there for that time.
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I got it all right, Lead, did you notice
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: anything that maybe we wouldn't have noticed that, any change
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: in her that you watched actually on the show, as
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: you all's relationship might have been going through whatever it
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: might have been going through.
• 20:24
  Speaker 5: She softened.
• 20:25
  Speaker 4: Oh, I would say, since being married and being with me,
• 20:29
  Speaker 4: and plus her hair and makeup looks really.
• 20:31
  Speaker 5: Good now.
• 20:34
  Speaker 3: Said that I stepped up my game.
• 20:36
  Speaker 4: Yeah, Ramona singer, New York. She goes, she goes, Yeah,
• 20:39
  Speaker 4: your wife really made you say? Oh, she said girlfriend,
• 20:42
  Speaker 4: but she doesn't. No, she's my wife. But so I
• 20:44
  Speaker 4: would say, and the skincare, because I'm a skincare expert
• 20:48
  Speaker 4: and so that side of it, right, Yeah, I've seen that.
• 20:52
  Speaker 3: I actually don't have any more clothes on it. We're
• 20:56
  Speaker 3: gonna go shop later and in a uniform my whole life.
• 20:59
  Speaker 2: That makes sense.
• 21:00
  Speaker 5: Yeah, she does, like, like.
• 21:01
  Speaker 3: I had to go buye this for today. Yeah.
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but we have to tell you every time we
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: see you in street clothes, we say wow, I'm not kidding.
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: You actually made a point. It's great they are she
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: likes she has good shoes. You got a good shoes, Yeah.
• 21:22
  Speaker 5: Good shoes. Oh yeah, they're good.
• 21:24
  Speaker 2: And Leah, I know that you have gone through your
• 21:27
  Speaker 2: own breast cancer scared you care?
• 21:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I had three scares three one backtomy. So far,
• 21:34
  Speaker 4: so good and just getting checked every six months.
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: Did that impact just because that's scare and that fear
• 21:40
  Speaker 2: of what if and what happens next? And yeah, all
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: those change just did it bring bring you all closer together?
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: Did what impact did that have on your relationship?
• 21:48
  Speaker 4: I mean, she's such a caretaker, you know, she's a
• 21:52
  Speaker 4: huge caretaker. So she was just like, no matter what,
• 21:54
  Speaker 4: we're going to work through it. You know, she was
• 21:57
  Speaker 4: all for Like if you need a double misectomy, like
• 22:00
  Speaker 4: we're going to do it.
• 22:00
  Speaker 5: We're going to find the best surgeon.
• 22:03
  Speaker 4: And so, I mean, we don't even question when it
• 22:07
  Speaker 4: comes to health.
• 22:09
  Speaker 5: We're just there for each other.
• 22:10
  Speaker 4: We're married and we Yeah, and I wasn't afraid to
• 22:15
  Speaker 4: lose anything, Like if it was going to save my life,
• 22:19
  Speaker 4: I don't care if I get rid of them. Plus
• 22:21
  Speaker 4: you can do a direct and plant now, so the reconstruction's.
• 22:25
  Speaker 2: A amazing what what would you say has been your
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: biggest struggle, your toughest moment as a couple, whether it
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: was when you were dating or when you got married.
• 22:35
  Speaker 5: The builder, the builder. Oh well, we had a builder
• 22:38
  Speaker 5: take all our money. The builder took all our money and.
• 22:41
  Speaker 3: All of our money.
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: What.
• 22:43
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we were robbed so and a lot of other homeowners.
• 22:47
  Speaker 4: We're building a house, we're making payments, and he used
• 22:51
  Speaker 4: the money for his own personal use.
• 22:54
  Speaker 3: So yeah, the builder. That was a big hurdle for us.
• 22:57
  Speaker 5: That was a big hurdle, but we realized that we
• 22:59
  Speaker 5: got through it.
• 23:00
  Speaker 3: In our house was a shell of a house.
• 23:01
  Speaker 6: My sister called and said, I'm not sure what's happening,
• 23:04
  Speaker 6: but nothing's happening on your house at all. I was like,
• 23:07
  Speaker 6: because we were living in Colorado.
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what ultimately happened to that.
• 23:14
  Speaker 3: There's a trial coming in July.
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: Trial but with a pyramid scheme basically, like he was
• 23:19
  Speaker 2: just I just he's.
• 23:21
  Speaker 6: A guy that inherited a business because he married somebody
• 23:24
  Speaker 6: and he ran it into the ground.
• 23:25
  Speaker 3: Oh wow, that's the reality.
• 23:28
  Speaker 4: That's because there was eleven other homeowners that he took
• 23:30
  Speaker 4: the money from.
• 23:31
  Speaker 6: So apparently the company, it was a wonderful establishment that
• 23:36
  Speaker 6: they were a great builder, had a great reputation, and
• 23:39
  Speaker 6: when he took over, that changed.
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: So dealing with massive financial loss, like that's that's stressful, very.
• 23:47
  Speaker 4: But that's what we're both very resilient people. We just
• 23:52
  Speaker 4: get right back up and what do you say? Wake up,
• 23:54
  Speaker 4: dress up, show up, kick ass.
• 23:55
  Speaker 5: That's her thing. And that's really how we live our life.
• 23:58
  Speaker 4: I mean, we don't lay in bed and we're not
• 23:59
  Speaker 4: deproud and we're just like, well, I get up and
• 24:01
  Speaker 4: do my hair and makeup. That's how I get ready
• 24:03
  Speaker 4: for the day. And you know, my b a little
• 24:06
  Speaker 4: bit and she plays with our dog. But we keep going.
• 24:08
  Speaker 4: I mean we don't or what else we win?
• 24:11
  Speaker 3: Got our uh CEO CEO?
• 24:14
  Speaker 5: I mean I became the.
• 24:15
  Speaker 6: Contract versus like you're living in your house. You're not
• 24:17
  Speaker 6: supposed to be living there because we didn't have our CEO.
• 24:19
  Speaker 3: What are they going to do? Arrest me? They're not
• 24:21
  Speaker 3: arresting the builder. They stole her money. They're going to
• 24:24
  Speaker 3: arrest me for a house I paid twice for.
• 24:27
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, have trees or grass.
• 24:32
  Speaker 3: But he's still walking living crazy.
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: Okay, that's another episode Crazy. Last few things here. You
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: said something earlier you never thought throughout your life, your
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: dating history, that you you never thought about getting married
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: until you met Leah, until you all got together. For
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: people hearing that, what did you listen to right quick?
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: Because that seemed like a huge switch in your life.
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: It's like you weren't even thinking about it and then
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: somebody made you think about it? What is that thing?
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: Because people are wondering is this it? Is this the one?
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: How do I know? What do I feel? What is
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: it that made you finally go, oh yeah, now I
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: want to get married.
• 25:08
  Speaker 6: Your heart You're willing to sacrifice, Like, it's like the sacrifice.
• 25:12
  Speaker 3: So you I've moved. I swear never move out of
• 25:16
  Speaker 3: la I swear never.
• 25:18
  Speaker 5: You made a list, tell them the list.
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: I made a list.
• 25:21
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 25:22
  Speaker 3: I love God first.
• 25:24
  Speaker 6: Yeah, so that was the list and music and music
• 25:28
  Speaker 6: and hot and hot.
• 25:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah. It was like, wow, cool because I love music.
• 25:37
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 25:38
  Speaker 2: I think it's cool for people to hear though, because
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: a lot of I think a lot of folks do
• 25:42
  Speaker 2: end up just kind of closing themselves off and just
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: saying it's not worth it and it's not going to happen.
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: But just when you think it it won't or it can't,
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: it can did you did you ever you weren't looking
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: for love, but did you lose hope? And did you
• 25:57
  Speaker 2: ever think it would happen like this?
• 25:59
  Speaker 6: I didn't lose hope. I just was oblivious. To be honest,
• 26:03
  Speaker 6: I don't know. I'm Peter Pan, I'm just I don't know.
• 26:05
  Speaker 6: I just continue to find joy. Yeah, but all formed
• 26:10
  Speaker 6: with a joyful heart. I I mean, I was born
• 26:14
  Speaker 6: with a joyful heart. Like I am a child, I
• 26:18
  Speaker 6: am a I have a child spirit.
• 26:20
  Speaker 4: But her friends told me, like you, we can't believe
• 26:26
  Speaker 4: that she found someone that made her settle down like that.
• 26:28
  Speaker 4: We can't believe she finally got married. We can't because
• 26:31
  Speaker 4: they didn't really think that that would happen with you.
• 26:34
  Speaker 4: And they're like wow. I'm like, all right, well you're.
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: Bliss Yeah, well what about you? Twenty year of marriage?
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: What is it that made you go okay, yeah, I
• 26:43
  Speaker 1: want to do this?
• 26:44
  Speaker 5: Her just meeting her.
• 26:47
  Speaker 4: I think when you just honestly, like I think, when
• 26:50
  Speaker 4: you have a connection with someone and you meet that
• 26:53
  Speaker 4: person and it's so powerful and strong, it you feel
• 26:56
  Speaker 4: like you can conquer the world with that person, by
• 26:58
  Speaker 4: your side and it just makes you You make decisions
• 27:01
  Speaker 4: and you don't really care what anyone thinks because you
• 27:04
  Speaker 4: just fell in love, you know, and it just works.
• 27:08
  Speaker 5: So, yeah, she gave me the courage to jump.
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: We've got to collect all these answers. That is a
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: wonderful way to put it. Like people always looking for advice,
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: relationship advice and concrete things on this, this and this.
• 27:21
  Speaker 1: That was just beautifully said. And I agree with you
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: what you're talking. It's how it's hard to explain. You
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: can't explain it until it happens to you and then
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: you go, oh, I know exactly what she's talking about.
• 27:30
  Speaker 5: Yeah, people judge you because they're not happy.
• 27:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we figure that out.
• 27:35
  Speaker 5: We know they're so judging because they're measurable and they
• 27:39
  Speaker 5: wish they found.
• 27:40
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you know that.
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: This is my last question. I'm wondering just what you
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: found and what you all have together. And it's palpable.
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: I mean we can see it in your faces and
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: your body language, how you look at each other. It's
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: just it's obvious that this is the real deal. Do
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: you think, having had lived enough life where you found
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: this love later in life, that you have the perspective
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: to actually feel confident where it isn't just this one
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: off or just this passion that could die out, but
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: it's deeper because you've lived enough life to know.
• 28:09
  Speaker 4: Yeah, everyone is like, oh, is that a phase for Leah?
• 28:13
  Speaker 4: You know, because she was like the straight girl in church?
• 28:16
  Speaker 4: And is this just a phase even when you were
• 28:18
  Speaker 4: I think wondering is this a phase because she didn't
• 28:21
  Speaker 4: want to get her heart broken? And I think just
• 28:24
  Speaker 4: time and you know, showing and action and going through
• 28:29
  Speaker 4: the hard times and the ups and downs. I mean,
• 28:31
  Speaker 4: we are very different and yet we compliment each other
• 28:37
  Speaker 4: so well and so and it was just worth every
• 28:40
  Speaker 4: single sacrifice and it was just worth it.
• 28:44
  Speaker 6: And I honestly, I I'm like, why not take the risk?
• 28:49
  Speaker 6: I would rather want to know than not know, you
• 28:52
  Speaker 6: know what I mean? So take the risk the worst
• 28:55
  Speaker 6: case scenarios. You're gonna have a little heartache, maybe a lot.
• 28:58
  Speaker 3: Of heartache, but you'll live. You know, It's worth taking
• 29:01
  Speaker 3: the risk. Yeah, love always is.
• 29:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Captain Sandy, is that annoying? Should I just call
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: you Sandy? Sorry?
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: Sandy?
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: Leah, thank you for sharing your love story with us.
• 29:15
  Speaker 2: I do think that it's so inspirational for a lot
• 29:17
  Speaker 2: of people listening who are hoping that they'll find love
• 29:20
  Speaker 2: the second time around, or the third time around, or
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: the fourth or whatever. This podcast at exactly. Thank you
• 29:28
  Speaker 2: so much for being with us and sharing.
• 29:29
  Speaker 5: Thanks for having us.
• 29:31
  Speaker 3: Thank you.
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: Catch the new season of Below Deck Mediterranean on Bravo
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: on Mondays at eight pm and then streaming the next.
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: Day on Peacock And to our listeners, we are here
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: to help. You can send us an email or leave
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: us a voicemail. All the info in the show notes.
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: Follow us on Socials, I Do Part two and iHeart
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: Radio podcast. We're falling in Love is the main objective.
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: We'll see you