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Dirty Little Secret: What would you do if you felt like you were drowning in responsibilities—but no one noticed?” · Billy The Kidd In The Morning

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Get it off your job to commise, you'll feel better.
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: Welcome to the Dirty Little Secret Mix one or two
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: point nine. It's biling a kid, Candice Lopez, producer who
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: Welcome to Dirty Little Secret. If you have one, bring
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: it on. We will get your confession and yes, say whatever.
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: It could be a big secret, a little secret. Eight
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: three three seven eight seven one oh two nine and
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: you have one. Welcome to Dirty Little Secret. How are you? Oh?
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: You there? You cut out a little bit either Yeah? Good?
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: How are you gotcha? I'm good? Okay, So you have
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: you got a secret? What's going on?
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: So? I told my husband that my schedule changed at work,
• 0:35
  Speaker 3: just a small adjustment. I said, an extra hour or two,
• 0:38
  Speaker 3: a few nights a week, nothing major. But the truth
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: is my hour didn't change at all.
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: They didn't change it all.
• 0:46
  Speaker 3: No, what did change was me? Or maybe I just
• 0:50
  Speaker 3: like finally hit my limit?
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: Well what what limit? Did you do that?
• 0:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: Why?
• 0:56
  Speaker 3: Well? For ten years I've been the one who keeps
• 0:58
  Speaker 3: the house running, packed lunches, folding laundry, remembering birthdays, signing
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: permission slip cooking dinner, cleaning up, and like still trying
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: to be the wife who smiles and asks how is
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: your day?
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so you you have been doing pretty much all
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: of the lifting when it comes to the house and
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: the kids and whatnot.
• 1:17
  Speaker 3: Exactly, he's not a bad man. He just works all
• 1:21
  Speaker 3: the time.
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: That's a lot.
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: Late night, yeah, weekends, important meetings. Meanwhile, like I've been
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: quietly drowning under the weight of everything else.
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: That's it, I mean, yeah, and that's a lot to handle.
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: I can't even imagine. And I know everybody plays their
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: roles and every relationship is different, but this is something
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: that's been weighing on you a lot.
• 1:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah. So one day I told a little lie. Now
• 1:44
  Speaker 3: like two or three times a week, I drive to
• 1:46
  Speaker 3: the park, grab a coffee and just sit. Okay, yeah,
• 1:51
  Speaker 3: sometimes I read maybe go to the galleria shop a
• 1:54
  Speaker 3: little wow, and he thinks you're just working your new hours.
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: You're at work exactly. It feels a little almost rebellious.
• 2:02
  Speaker 3: But like at first I felt guilty, but like the
• 2:05
  Speaker 3: guilt just like melted into relief.
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: Okay, so this is now. Why let me ask you this.
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: Why can't you just tell him that you needed you
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: don't feel like he would accept it? Or is this
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: just an easier way to avoid the conflict of saying, hey,
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: you know what, baby, I need some me time. Like
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: I'm doing all this stuff at home and I know
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: you work, but I need some time for just me,
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: no kids, no family, just taking care of myself.
• 2:29
  Speaker 3: Well that and like also I just kind of want
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: him to kind of feel like for ones, like a
• 2:35
  Speaker 3: little panic of like when the kids ask what's for dinner, Dad,
• 2:38
  Speaker 3: and like have to feel like what it's like.
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: To like that interesting. So there's a little more to
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: this than just at midtime. There's also like I'll show
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: you what I've been doing for ten years a little bit.
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, I just I kind of want him
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: to get a taste of what my life's like.
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: I think this happens more than we know.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I think we should all just like schedule into
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: our lives. There's a timeout. I get a time out today,
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: you get a time out tomorrow, or we both have
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: a timeout every day, you know what I mean, where
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: it's just understood that this is my time, I do
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: what I need to do, and then I think we're
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: all going to be better outside of that time.
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: Now, the only issue I can see is, I mean,
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: obviously line's never good and it could give you some trouble.
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: Let's say, if your man finds out that you're not
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: at work, then it looks extra shady, like you're doing
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: something weird that you're not doing right.
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean that I did think of that, and
• 3:27
  Speaker 3: I think I just will eventually come clean with him
• 3:31
  Speaker 3: or just you know, cut it out.
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: I appreciate you confessing to us. And if you're a
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: mom out there and you do this, because I will
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: say this, I know guys do this. I oh yes,
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: oh yeah, I know. I have personal friends that do this.
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: I have friends that go, yeah, I gotta work, lay babe,
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: and they go do fantasy football with some friends, or
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: they go have a drink, or they do this because
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: they just want a moment before they get inside. It's
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: like the equivalent of sitting in the car before you
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: walk in the house, right, only for two hours?
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: Geez, okay, that's not okay, two hours?
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: Well that's what she's doing two hours, she says, a
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: couple of times a week, where it's a few hours
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: a week
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: An extra hour, y okay, Well she needs it.