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Transcript

New Dirty Little Secret: Petty Revenge That's Pure Genius” · Billy The Kidd In The Morning

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: This is dirty little secret.
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: I'm nixed one or two point nine.
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: It's bailing to keep Candice slow Pants producer, pooh, cleanse
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: your soul, a little spring cleaning for your soul. It
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: feels good to just confess sometimes things you don't want
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: to tell anybody else.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: Maybe you don't want to tell your friends this. Maybe
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: you're embarrassed to tell your family this.
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: You come to us and just get it off your
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: chest with anything eight three three seven, eight seven, one
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: oh two nine or DM me at Billy on the radio.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: We could set it up that way on Instagram. Whatever
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: you want. You got one.
• 0:29
  Speaker 3: Well, I know this is petty, but I kind of
• 0:32
  Speaker 3: need to confess it because I'm pretty proud of it.
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: Actually, Oh, you're proud of your pettiness. I'm not mad
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: at that.
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: We like a little petty in our world, so as
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: long as it's not against us.
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: So who you being petty with?
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: Well, my ex is the bartender. Okay, so he works
• 0:48
  Speaker 3: late nights and he sleeps all day. Obviously it's not
• 0:51
  Speaker 3: just because of his job. It's because he's lazy too.
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 0:56
  Speaker 3: He somehow had the energy to be talking to other
• 0:59
  Speaker 3: girls behind my back.
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: Oh really, oh yeah, so talking to other girls. So
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: he sleeps and cheats what chicken dinner?
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: So I confronted him about it, obviously, and he said
• 1:17
  Speaker 3: he had every excuse in the world. He said, oh,
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: we're just friends and you're overthinking it. Of course he
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: almost had me hold. But one morning I caught a
• 1:26
  Speaker 3: girl leaving his house when I thought he was out
• 1:29
  Speaker 3: of town.
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: Oh the out of town trick. The girl was leaving
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: his house.
• 1:35
  Speaker 3: Yeah, oh yeah, okay, so you mean he was out
• 1:38
  Speaker 3: of town. Yeah.
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: So even though the fact that you knew he was
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: talking to other girls, you were still like, okay, fine, whatever,
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: we'll see what happens. You continue to date, and then
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: you find a girl leaving his house, then it's like, okay,
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: then is it over?
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: Then it's it's gotta be yeah. Yeah.
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: So after we broke up, I just I could not
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: resist just a little bit of petty revenge.
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: Okay, what what what are you doing? What did you do?
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: Dude? I mean, it wasn't anything crazy, just to be annoying,
• 2:03
  Speaker 3: you know what I mean. Here's what I did.
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: Oh god.
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: I started going online and filling out those forms for
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: like roof inspections and solar companies and home security quotes
• 2:15
  Speaker 3: and things.
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: Like that, so he'll get calls.
• 2:19
  Speaker 3: So basically any company that will send people out to
• 2:22
  Speaker 3: your house to get an estimate.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: Wow, so you made so you made appointments for them
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: to show to actually show up to his house.
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, oh yeah, I scheduled them early in the morning,
• 2:40
  Speaker 3: available please, Yeah.
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's actually awesome.
• 2:44
  Speaker 3: Okay, I've got them set up for at least twice
• 2:47
  Speaker 3: a week for the next month.
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: That this would be my absolute worst night.
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: And the door. But the thing, the thing is, it's
• 3:03
  Speaker 3: not on the same day. They're totally random. It's like
• 3:06
  Speaker 3: Monday morning or Saturday or Wednesday, like eight.
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: Am, so he won't know when they're coming. I mean,
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: he'll have to figure this out eventually, I don't know.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: But how do you stop it? You can't stop it.
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: He'll put some on his door. The only thing I
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: would do is maybe put some on my door. Like
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: if I don't knock, I don't have an appointment made
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: with you. This is my crazy ex girlfriend.
• 3:27
  Speaker 3: Well, the thing is, well, I mean there's one thing
• 3:29
  Speaker 3: he hates more than anything, any people knocking on his door.
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: Oh me too.
• 3:34
  Speaker 3: Do you think it was hurt.
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's true. He's right like I had the worst
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: luck ever. Yeah, what did I actually sign up?
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: I mean, he's trying to sleep after bartending all night
• 3:43
  Speaker 3: and here's some cheerful guy coming to the door going
• 3:46
  Speaker 3: that came, I'm here to talk about your room.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: Good for you, all right, I'm not mad at that.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: This is actually not as bad as I thought it
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: was going to be. He made you miserable. It's only fair.
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: You make him miserable exactly, and then wake up all
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: those girls in his bed. I shouldn't have said that.
• 4:05
  Speaker 3: Oh I don't care, okay in the summer.
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: Good all right, Well, congratulations, you've got the Katie Petty Award.
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: There you go.