Latest / NFL Podcast Network Selects / Gentle Laxatives

Transcript

Gentle Laxatives · NFL Podcast Network Selects

0:01
Speaker 1: When I woke up this morning, I was feeling pretty dangerous.
0:03
Speaker 1: We're on a cincinnight, it's my quarterback. They are, well
0:08
Speaker 1: we thought they were, and we got about Hello, you
0:12
Speaker 1: play to win the day. They want you to cook
0:14
Speaker 1: the dinner. At least they ought to let your shot
0:16
Speaker 1: for some of the grocery. And on the way up,
0:18
Speaker 1: we're gonna buy to kneecap all getting me playoffs. I'm
0:21
Speaker 1: just here so I won't get fine. How could he
0:23
Speaker 1: not be romantic about football? After Hello, everybody? Welcome to
0:28
Speaker 1: the Bench with Banetta podcast. This That insured just kind
0:32
Speaker 1: of made me sad. We're a couple of weeks out
0:36
Speaker 1: from football now, and I'm just depressed. I don't know
0:40
Speaker 1: how you guys are feeling, Like, what did you do
0:42
Speaker 1: with your Sunday? I did absolutely nothing. It was boring.
0:46
Speaker 1: I know, I usually do absolutely nothing. I just watch
0:48
Speaker 1: football all this time was it was way worse. Um
0:52
Speaker 1: this week was the two two two to to two
0:54
Speaker 1: too too too Tuesday? Um, and everybody was like posting
0:58
Speaker 1: on social media about how match their day was and
1:00
Speaker 1: it's like, oh my god, it was Derek Henry Day
1:03
Speaker 1: in Titan's Land. Yeah whatever, Um, but did you guys
1:08
Speaker 1: see everyone being like the magical. Make sure you make
1:11
Speaker 1: a wish and throw it into the ocean. Guys, I
1:14
Speaker 1: had the worst freaking day. I got stuck in traffic,
1:19
Speaker 1: I got home, I got then I got stuck in
1:21
Speaker 1: a TikTok freaking wormhole. I just had a bad day,
1:26
Speaker 1: and it just made me feel even worse being on
1:28
Speaker 1: TikTok and just watching all these people have a magical
1:30
Speaker 1: to Tuesday. Um, okay, so we're in the We're officially
1:34
Speaker 1: in it. We are in the off season, guys. Last
1:36
Speaker 1: week was a nice vacation. I got to put my
1:38
Speaker 1: foot up, drank a couple of dranks, and now we
1:41
Speaker 1: are in the off season. I'm going to combine next week.
1:45
Speaker 1: Maybe got a little draft situation in a little while.
1:47
Speaker 1: But we're We're in it. We're bored, We're um. We
1:52
Speaker 1: might be doing some Oscar picks in a couple of
1:55
Speaker 1: weeks on this podcast, because that's naturally what you do
1:58
Speaker 1: in the off season. But we were just talking about
1:59
Speaker 1: movies where we got started, and it reminded me. Junkyard
2:02
Speaker 1: Dog said that Marry Me is his favorite movie that
2:05
Speaker 1: was ever made. Sorry you've not seen it, right, I
2:09
Speaker 1: haven't seen it, but I've heard him incredible things. You've
2:11
Speaker 1: heard some good things. And I was telling the story
2:13
Speaker 1: about how I actually auditioned for this movie like probably
2:18
Speaker 1: three years ago because movies take a really long time
2:21
Speaker 1: to make and obviously the pandemic, but I auditioned for
2:23
Speaker 1: it and was so excited. I slept with a maid
2:27
Speaker 1: in Manhattan DVD underneath my pill for good luck. I
2:34
Speaker 1: didn't get it. I actually think a man was cast
2:37
Speaker 1: in the part that I was auditioning for's role. It
2:41
Speaker 1: was I was going to marry and make out with
2:43
Speaker 1: j Low. But it actually is a really cute script
2:45
Speaker 1: and it's super funny. Um. But yeah, we're gonna do
2:47
Speaker 1: some Oscar picks in a couple of weeks because we're
2:50
Speaker 1: a little short on football news. But like this week,
2:53
Speaker 1: I was just telling guys, I drove all the way
2:55
Speaker 1: into all the way to San Diego, which from LA
2:58
Speaker 1: is about the cool, like six hours in the car
3:01
Speaker 1: to interview a punter that's going to be at the Columbine,
3:04
Speaker 1: and I was like, Okay, yeah, we're in the off season.
3:08
Speaker 1: We have officially um arrived. I'm not watching a lot
3:12
Speaker 1: of TV right now. I'm watching Love is Blind season two,
3:15
Speaker 1: which Mohun, I think that usually go on you can
3:18
Speaker 1: find would your love? I think that you could do it.
3:21
Speaker 1: You're not interested in doing any kind of reality love. Yeah,
3:23
Speaker 1: in situation, what if we did a reality love situation
3:27
Speaker 1: on this show down whoa for real? We could find
3:35
Speaker 1: you a football love and gal? Yeah we shit no
3:38
Speaker 1: Steelers fans though, but stay tuned, stay tuned. We'll talk
3:42
Speaker 1: about that. But I've been watching a lot of Love
3:45
Speaker 1: Is Blind and I actually had a meeting this morning
3:48
Speaker 1: with a production company and I was doing like a
3:51
Speaker 1: little deep dive on like what they had made and
3:53
Speaker 1: stuff like that, and I saw a show called Catching
3:58
Speaker 1: Kelsey pop Up. Do you guys know that Travis Kelsey
4:01
Speaker 1: had a dating show in twenty sixteen on EOW like
4:06
Speaker 1: inn Fifty girls from fifty different states tried to win
4:11
Speaker 1: the hand of Travis Kelsey. This is a real show
4:16
Speaker 1: that actually happened. He ended up with one of the girls.
4:19
Speaker 1: Shout out to Maya, the winner of season one. Who wow,
4:21
Speaker 1: this is a real show that happened. And so I
4:24
Speaker 1: just went into a deep dive on him. You know,
4:27
Speaker 1: it's like legitimately like The Bachelor, like they went on
4:29
Speaker 1: these fun dates. He had like a photoshoot that these
4:32
Speaker 1: girls had to come and help with, Like this is insane.
4:35
Speaker 1: So if anybody wants anything random to binge in the
4:39
Speaker 1: off season, I think we should do a watch party
4:41
Speaker 1: of Catching Kelsey would be this is actually going to
4:44
Speaker 1: become a podcast of every single episode. It's a rewatch
4:46
Speaker 1: podcast of Catching Kelsey. Okay, there are some things going
4:51
Speaker 1: on in the football world. Number one I think that's
4:55
Speaker 1: trending this week is Aaron Rodgers and whatever the hell
4:58
Speaker 1: he is doing. He went on Pat McAfee's show on
5:00
Speaker 1: Tuesday like he usually does, and on Monday, everyone, even
5:05
Speaker 1: Pat I think, was tweeting like, ooh, Tomorrow's going to
5:08
Speaker 1: be a pretty crazy guest and tomorrow is gonna be
5:10
Speaker 1: a crazy show. Everyone was like, okay, Aaron Rodgers going
5:12
Speaker 1: to retire on Tuesday, Like that is what this is.
5:14
Speaker 1: He posted this super cryptic Instagram post where he's thanking everybody.
5:19
Speaker 1: Even Shaleen Woodley was in there gratitude. Okay, so everyone
5:27
Speaker 1: was like, this is gonna happen, and then he goes
5:28
Speaker 1: on the Pat McAfee show right away. Is like, for
5:32
Speaker 1: those of you that think you're gonna hear news today.
5:34
Speaker 1: It's not happening. I'm not retiring today. I'm still think
5:37
Speaker 1: about it and whatever. The Literally, the only thing that
5:40
Speaker 1: we found out is that he's on a cleanse, which
5:42
Speaker 1: means he's just pooping a lot for the last twelve days. Literally,
5:46
Speaker 1: the only thing that we've got back at today that
5:49
Speaker 1: it was the number one story in the football world
5:52
Speaker 1: this day. That's how you know it's dire times. But
5:54
Speaker 1: um so he's on this twelve day cleanse that he
5:58
Speaker 1: goes into. Where we have some info on this cleanse? Unfortunately,
6:03
Speaker 1: where is that? Let me find it? Let me find it?
6:04
Speaker 1: Too much detail. To be honest, I don't need to
6:06
Speaker 1: know about it. It literally just sounds like he's on
6:09
Speaker 1: vacation and a spa, like, just spare us the details.
6:12
Speaker 1: As soon as as soon as he said cleanse, Pat
6:15
Speaker 1: McAfee did a gesture that indicated that his body is
6:18
Speaker 1: being cleaned out. And I'm like, no one needs to
6:21
Speaker 1: You already subjected us to your dirty toes this year. Okay,
6:24
Speaker 1: So wake up with sunrise and practice gently yoga and meditation.
6:28
Speaker 1: Drink a cup of spiced tea whatever, whatever, enjoy light breakfast,
6:32
Speaker 1: begin your first treatment of the day, such as an
6:35
Speaker 1: oil massage. Then you do like a steam or a sauna.
6:40
Speaker 1: Then you eat weird lunch of lentils and rice in
6:42
Speaker 1: healing spices. Water are those? Stop it? Walk around in
6:50
Speaker 1: nature and sit and meditate, take naps as needed. Like,
6:54
Speaker 1: what is this? This just sounds like you're at a spa, dude.
6:57
Speaker 1: I did the same thing last week, except for healing spices.
7:01
Speaker 1: I was drinking mes cow. That's some healing spices for you.
7:04
Speaker 1: Oh whoa. Uh so, anyways, that was So what are
7:08
Speaker 1: you guys saying? Do you think he's retiring? I think
7:09
Speaker 1: he's retiring and just is stringing us along because he's
7:12
Speaker 1: annoyed with the media. This is his payback for what
7:15
Speaker 1: we did did to him this year. And I did
7:19
Speaker 1: the quotation heavy year. I don't think he's a retired
7:22
Speaker 1: You don't think so. Do you think he'll go back
7:23
Speaker 1: to the packers? Um? Unsure of that. But this is
7:27
Speaker 1: all just a point, like we don't need to know
7:29
Speaker 1: about his like gentle axatives and vomiting and his gentive
7:33
Speaker 1: evacuating both both ends don't evacuate anything yet. Well, I
7:40
Speaker 1: did moland the word gentle. That's what it's say and
7:44
Speaker 1: therapeutic vomiting ayahuasca. No, it's puncha karma that I wonder
7:52
Speaker 1: if it is kind of like an ayahuasca if he's
7:54
Speaker 1: like puking and stuff. I wonder if he's hallucinating and
7:56
Speaker 1: he's doing these like steams and yannas, and what if
8:00
Speaker 1: the healing spices is and eating butter, like three days
8:04
Speaker 1: of butter all you eat is. But that's a real thing.
8:06
Speaker 1: That's a part of the uh huh No, yeah, yeah,
8:09
Speaker 1: until you start evacuating from both ends. That's what That's
8:12
Speaker 1: what it is. Punch of karma, what kind of I
8:18
Speaker 1: don't think. I don't retackt karma. No way he retires,
8:20
Speaker 1: you don't. You don't do this cleanse and then retire.
8:23
Speaker 1: I will say. When I was at the NFL Honors
8:24
Speaker 1: and he was like thanking the flora, I was just like, Oh,
8:26
Speaker 1: he's for sure coming back because he's like, you're part
8:28
Speaker 1: of the reason why you know, I want you know,
8:31
Speaker 1: you're kind of the reason why I want MVP these
8:33
Speaker 1: last two years. And then he said the same thing
8:34
Speaker 1: about Chaneleean Woodley. So are they together? I think not.
8:37
Speaker 1: Is this going to become a relationship podcast. Are we
8:39
Speaker 1: just you know, the National Enquirer of the football league?
8:42
Speaker 1: We should be? If we're not, I don't know who
8:44
Speaker 1: else would be. I think the fall actually into the
8:46
Speaker 1: category exactly. Uh, punch of karma? Would you guys do it? Yes?
8:50
Speaker 1: Or no? Junkyard dog? Hell? Now, what if? What if
8:53
Speaker 1: I told you you were gonna have a six pack
8:55
Speaker 1: after and you're gonna be ripped and feel great about
8:58
Speaker 1: your life? Is that a site of because maybe he
9:01
Speaker 1: probably already has a six pack. To be honest, it
9:02
Speaker 1: might just be more defined after he took the gentle accident, right.
9:07
Speaker 1: I hate that he said that, what about you? Would
9:09
Speaker 1: you do it? No? I wouldn't do it. I would
9:11
Speaker 1: do it. I would for sure do it. I've done
9:13
Speaker 1: cleanses before, and you feel great and you feel like
9:15
Speaker 1: an actual human being. The stuff that we put into
9:17
Speaker 1: our body, the added sugars that we the alcohol. I
9:22
Speaker 1: don't think I could do a whole thirty let alone,
9:24
Speaker 1: something like I tried whole thirty and I did whole
9:27
Speaker 1: twenty four pretty well. What does whole thirty mean? So
9:31
Speaker 1: cutting out whole thirty is like no sugar, no dairy,
9:35
Speaker 1: no gluten, no booze, no booze. Yeah. I did that
9:38
Speaker 1: for ten days before the Super Bowl. Hey, that's pretty good. Yeah,
9:40
Speaker 1: and I felt great. My skin looked amazing. I looked
9:43
Speaker 1: like five years younger. Okay. So that's basically what we
9:48
Speaker 1: learned this week about Aaron Rodgers. Here's the thing. He
9:52
Speaker 1: is becoming more and more spiritual, though, like I just
9:54
Speaker 1: it kind of seems like his vibe doesn't necessarily fit
9:58
Speaker 1: in with football anymore. Football is a very aggressive sport
10:02
Speaker 1: and people are getting hit and it's a very macho,
10:05
Speaker 1: you know, dude lee thing, and he's becoming this very zen,
10:10
Speaker 1: you know, meditative, healthy person, and I just don't I
10:14
Speaker 1: have a hard time seeing that he fits in the
10:16
Speaker 1: NFL anymore. And maybe that's the best thing for him.
10:18
Speaker 1: Go retire, Go go do your thing, you know. Okay.
10:23
Speaker 1: And then another thing that came out Tom Brady is
10:26
Speaker 1: transitioning into the field of emotion pictures. He is did
10:33
Speaker 1: he start a production I know he probably already has
10:35
Speaker 1: a production company and they sold a movie or what's
10:41
Speaker 1: the deal with this? So Brady, this is from a
10:44
Speaker 1: Hollywood Reporter article about it is was deeply involved with
10:48
Speaker 1: the inception of the project he will produce through his
10:52
Speaker 1: production company One ninety nine Productions, along with the executive
10:56
Speaker 1: producer of the film and Endeavor Content. So he is
11:00
Speaker 1: gonna be producing it. And then hold on, hold on,
11:02
Speaker 1: I'm seeing these notes now based on a true story
11:04
Speaker 1: about four friends making a road trip in twenty seventeen
11:07
Speaker 1: to see Brady and the Patriots take on the Falcons
11:10
Speaker 1: in Super Bowl fifty one. Oh my god, called eighty
11:15
Speaker 1: from Brady? Is this real? Stop? Oh my god? Can
11:20
Speaker 1: we buy tickets now? Lily Tomlin, Love, Jane Fonda, Holy
11:24
Speaker 1: CRAPA read a Moreno, and Sally Field and they're all
11:28
Speaker 1: eighty And those are the four friends that are making
11:31
Speaker 1: the road trip. Yeah. Thanks, Oh my goodness, Okay, this
11:39
Speaker 1: makes so much sense. This movie is gonna be so amazing.
11:41
Speaker 1: I was thinking that he was actually just going to
11:43
Speaker 1: try and act in a movie, and I'm like, I
11:45
Speaker 1: don't know if I can see that. He's got to
11:46
Speaker 1: play himself. He's too big, right. Well, don't forget um.
11:50
Speaker 1: He made his acting debut I think in Ted two
11:53
Speaker 1: when they tried to steal something from him. I also
11:55
Speaker 1: thought I saw that he was in hold on pause.
11:59
Speaker 1: We need to look up his IMDb because I actually
12:01
Speaker 1: think he was in a movie before he was like drafted.
12:05
Speaker 1: Oh okay, okay, yes, no, this is true. Two thousand
12:08
Speaker 1: and three, Brady was listed as computer geek number one
12:14
Speaker 1: in the movie Stuck on You with Matt Damon and
12:22
Speaker 1: Greg Kinnear. Wow. Wow, computer geek number one two thousand
12:26
Speaker 1: and three. So he's already in the NFL for a
12:28
Speaker 1: couple of years. I have a have a quarterback movie question.
12:31
Speaker 1: Oh okay, so how would you rank these three NFL
12:34
Speaker 1: quarterbacks in the movies that they were in? Like how
12:37
Speaker 1: are there? Okay, love, I love. So we have Tom
12:39
Speaker 1: Brady and Ted two. Um. For a reminder, Ted and
12:43
Speaker 1: Mark Wahlberg try to break into his house justin ACiE.
12:47
Speaker 1: You can explain it's coming back. It's coming back. Seth
12:50
Speaker 1: McFarlane as Ted thing from him pretty not memorable, but okay,
12:55
Speaker 1: that's fine with um. Brett Farven Something about Mary what wow? Yeah?
13:02
Speaker 1: And then Dan Marino and as Fan Church that number one,
13:05
Speaker 1: number number one. Brett farr was in Something about Mary, Yeah,
13:10
Speaker 1: like as himself. Yeah, he came in at the end
13:13
Speaker 1: and he was he used to date Cameron Diaz and
13:16
Speaker 1: he was like one of the boys that were, Oh
13:18
Speaker 1: that's pretty good. Okay, I'll do that number two. And
13:20
Speaker 1: then I don't even remember Tom Brady and Ted ye two,
13:24
Speaker 1: not even Ted one, Ted two. He was in Ted too.
13:26
Speaker 1: He got shotted. He didn't even get the original. So
13:28
Speaker 1: that's what's going on in our world this week. Pretty
13:32
Speaker 1: exciting stuff combines coming up. A lot of people are
13:36
Speaker 1: on Team Pete. Is that what you're just about to say? Oh,
13:38
Speaker 1: I was gonna say peak offseason. Oh okay, I was
13:41
Speaker 1: in my feelings. Yeah no, and we don't have to
13:43
Speaker 1: talk about it. We could, We don't have to revisit this.
13:46
Speaker 1: Pete texted me and said thanks for being on Team Pete,
13:49
Speaker 1: and I was like, I'm the president of the fan club,
13:51
Speaker 1: So I got you guys the fight. You would think
13:54
Speaker 1: that he would dissipate after this. It just amped up
13:57
Speaker 1: because then all of a sudden, our friends who had
13:59
Speaker 1: seen me post the clip online, we're like, I'm team
14:02
Speaker 1: Rachel actually, and then Pete would get upset and then
14:04
Speaker 1: I'd have to be like damage control. I feel like
14:06
Speaker 1: I didn't include enough context in the clip online, and
14:09
Speaker 1: that's why the overwhelming responses on Twitter and Instagram. We're
14:13
Speaker 1: team Pete. No, but I actually gotta okay, so, yeah,
14:16
Speaker 1: everyone online screws. I was, you're all team Pete, It's
14:18
Speaker 1: fine whatever. But we got a couple of friends, including
14:21
Speaker 1: Pete's friends, who were like, we're actually team Rachel Pete,
14:23
Speaker 1: you suck, and I was just like, yeah, Pete, actually
14:26
Speaker 1: you do. And then there was blew whatever, justin do
14:29
Speaker 1: you know what a I TA means? And in the afternoon, see,
14:35
Speaker 1: I told you to clarify. I posted this clip online.
14:41
Speaker 1: Am I the asshole? Oh? I have to believe that.
14:45
Speaker 1: That's fine? People will know what I'm saying. It's a
14:47
Speaker 1: Reddit thing, but it's a Reddit thread, and people are saying,
14:50
Speaker 1: am I the beep because I did X y Z
14:54
Speaker 1: And then people kind of like chime in, I know,
14:56
Speaker 1: TFW that's popular that feeling when yeah, that's what we're
15:00
Speaker 1: going to break. Oh yeah, that one. That's one t
15:03
Speaker 1: I L Yeah til today I learned. Sorry about this, listeners,
15:09
Speaker 1: We'll be right back after this. This is safe space.
15:21
Speaker 1: Tell me your deepest, darkest secrets DMS now open. Okay,
15:30
Speaker 1: So I've decided to go back and forth between my
15:33
Speaker 1: Twitter and my Instagram just to like feel the different
15:36
Speaker 1: vibes um and I gotta tell you, guys, it's pretty
15:40
Speaker 1: deeply disturbing. It doesn't matter on either platform people. And
15:47
Speaker 1: here's the thing I kind of have to tell people
15:50
Speaker 1: send I can't just say, hey, tell me something, Hey
15:52
Speaker 1: tell me a secret, tell me, tell me whatever you
15:55
Speaker 1: want to tell me. I have to prompt them and say,
15:57
Speaker 1: tell me weird stuff, because that's the stuff that's interesting.
16:00
Speaker 1: And then I end up getting truly dark, weird stuff.
16:08
Speaker 1: A lot about my feet that I just have to ignore.
16:11
Speaker 1: But these are some of the gems that I found.
16:13
Speaker 1: Amongst them, Hey can I commission hold on, I gotta
16:17
Speaker 1: One guy said, um, could I commission you for a
16:21
Speaker 1: foot painting? And then maybe I'll give it to you
16:23
Speaker 1: after it's like, I'm sorry, maybe, like do I have
16:27
Speaker 1: to pay you for a painting of my foot? Do
16:29
Speaker 1: you want a painting of your foot? I mean, if
16:32
Speaker 1: somebody painted foot picture on my foot, I'll see what
16:34
Speaker 1: it looks like, a right, see it? Maybe not like
16:37
Speaker 1: hang it, just dunk it in some paints and if
16:40
Speaker 1: I put it on a piece of paper, piece of art.
16:42
Speaker 1: We need art for a footprint, like like a finger painting,
16:45
Speaker 1: like like when your baby's born and they do the
16:46
Speaker 1: little Yeah, do you guys are making it actually sound
16:48
Speaker 1: kind of cool? Yeah? All right, let's listen to some
16:50
Speaker 1: of these. I always talk on the phone when I
16:55
Speaker 1: go number two always. I have no issue with it. Okay,
17:06
Speaker 1: this is sick. This is sick. But when I feel
17:09
Speaker 1: like you do this, no, Like My question for this
17:13
Speaker 1: this person is like, who's always available? Oh yeah, are
17:18
Speaker 1: you happy? Like exactly, Like the only person who might
17:21
Speaker 1: be available at all times? It might be this person's mom, Like,
17:24
Speaker 1: do you know what scares me? That? This might be
17:26
Speaker 1: a telemarketer? Like why are you always on your phone?
17:30
Speaker 1: It's somebody that's always on their phone? Yeah, marketer? Can
17:33
Speaker 1: I put Pete on blast? Yeah? He does this. He
17:36
Speaker 1: talks on the toilet specifically to me, but I've caught
17:39
Speaker 1: him doing it other times to other people. Wow, yeah,
17:42
Speaker 1: that no echo one thousands there is, at least with me.
17:45
Speaker 1: I don't know if he tries to mute it with
17:47
Speaker 1: other people. But I've also caught I've walked into our house.
17:51
Speaker 1: This guy never closes the door. I walk into our
17:54
Speaker 1: house and he is on a business call and peeing,
17:57
Speaker 1: and I'm like, they're gonna hear you with mute it
18:00
Speaker 1: and he's like, no, I'm hitting I'm hitting the side.
18:02
Speaker 1: We talked about it after. He's like, I was hitting
18:03
Speaker 1: the side of the porcelain scene. That's that's that's that's
18:07
Speaker 1: that's something you do. Prove smart shirt. It's yeah, Team Pete.
18:11
Speaker 1: It's fine as long as you don't flush with Like,
18:14
Speaker 1: if you mute the mic before you flush, you're you're good.
18:17
Speaker 1: But don't flush on the phone with someone, because then
18:19
Speaker 1: they're gonna be like, well one thousand percent. Even. I
18:22
Speaker 1: feel like if somebody is talking in their bathroom, you
18:24
Speaker 1: can hear the specific echo of a bathroom. Um, so, hey,
18:30
Speaker 1: hit me up if you're on Team Pete. Now, how
18:32
Speaker 1: about that. Let's hear the next one. I told my
18:36
Speaker 1: wife when I pass, I want my ash. She said
18:40
Speaker 1: to Joe Burrow, what would you do if you received
18:44
Speaker 1: a box of Okay, I'll say something dark. I don't
18:47
Speaker 1: know if you guys have ever seen ashe's before, but
18:49
Speaker 1: there are like chunks of bone and teeth and stuff
18:51
Speaker 1: in them. You can actually see the person that it
18:54
Speaker 1: belongs to. We're just messed up. Um. I was trying
18:57
Speaker 1: to think today, what would I do if I received
18:59
Speaker 1: some but these ashes if they were a die hard
19:03
Speaker 1: fan of yours. Yeah, like dear Rachel. Um, my best
19:07
Speaker 1: friend Billy wanted to commission painting of your foot. He
19:12
Speaker 1: actually died yesterday. Here are his ashes, um, because because
19:17
Speaker 1: here's the thing, if Joe Burrow is, if you were
19:20
Speaker 1: in possession of somebody's ashes, you can't just throw them out.
19:24
Speaker 1: You gotta do something with them. I think I just
19:26
Speaker 1: put them into the ocean. Yeah, but I would be
19:29
Speaker 1: I'd be sad about it. Yeah, I'd feel bad. It's
19:32
Speaker 1: it's definitely an ocean. Over keeping it on your like
19:34
Speaker 1: fireplace mantle or something. Yeah, because you'd have to explain
19:37
Speaker 1: that if people came over. I actually saw a video
19:40
Speaker 1: on TikTok last week of somebody throwing their grandma's ashes
19:42
Speaker 1: into like a river, and then it's spelled out I
19:45
Speaker 1: love you like I heart you and they all started
19:48
Speaker 1: freaking out. Is that because it's real? It was everything
19:56
Speaker 1: you do see on TikTok is actually real. I'm skeptical
19:59
Speaker 1: Google the spirits are a live anyways, Joe Burrow, you
20:05
Speaker 1: might be receiving some ashes, so heads up, maybe maybe
20:08
Speaker 1: he can turn it into a cute little necklace. We're
20:13
Speaker 1: to the Super Bowl next year? All right, what's the
20:16
Speaker 1: next one. I broke into a stadium and steal thousands
20:22
Speaker 1: of cups. They had to replace all of them. Cool story, bro,
20:29
Speaker 1: Why would you break into a city and steal cups?
20:31
Speaker 1: I would steal a chair. How do you carry out
20:33
Speaker 1: thousands of cups? That's actually a really good question. I
20:38
Speaker 1: did a podcast before called Hall of Shame was canceled,
20:42
Speaker 1: was fine, and we talked about the craziest things that
20:44
Speaker 1: have ever happened in the sports world. And one time
20:46
Speaker 1: we did a story on Cleveland Beer Night ten cent
20:49
Speaker 1: beer Night. Do you hear about this? Yeah, the baseball
20:51
Speaker 1: team in Cleveland did ten cent beer Night, and everyone
20:55
Speaker 1: got so reckless. Obviously ten cent beer, and um, I
21:01
Speaker 1: think people knew that it was gonna get crazy, so
21:03
Speaker 1: they brought chains, they brought fireworks, they brought knives, they
21:06
Speaker 1: brought like dynamite and crazy stuff, and um, they were
21:11
Speaker 1: like ripping out chairs and you just saw people leaving
21:13
Speaker 1: the stadium with like just a bunch of just they
21:16
Speaker 1: would grab whatever they could. Wow. I would steal a chair,
21:19
Speaker 1: maybe some turf or grass. Oh yeah, that would be
21:22
Speaker 1: a good one. People go to beaches and take sand
21:25
Speaker 1: like it would be so put it into a little vial.
21:28
Speaker 1: Or you're gonna have a little vial of turf that
21:29
Speaker 1: you just wears a necklace. Yeah, I think that'd be cool.
21:32
Speaker 1: Would you still you like turning things into necklaces? Huh
21:36
Speaker 1: just makes sense. Ashes turf, what would you stee? I
21:40
Speaker 1: would steal confetti from the confetti drop thing. Yeah, but
21:45
Speaker 1: you what, No, it's special confetti, but doesn't look like
21:49
Speaker 1: the confetti when it goes off. Yeah, but it's all
21:52
Speaker 1: about telling people what you did. I still confetti the
21:56
Speaker 1: head and yet gone out of the can't can't. But
21:58
Speaker 1: when it does a lot of other people, we're gonna
22:00
Speaker 1: have this too. Okay that sounds stupid? Or do we
22:04
Speaker 1: have one more? Yes? We do. When I was little,
22:11
Speaker 1: I kissed my sister's barbie, hoping it would come to life.
22:21
Speaker 1: Oh this is here? You said this? Why did I think?
22:26
Speaker 1: Why did I see that coming? This is really just sweet.
22:29
Speaker 1: This is really just cute. He probably watched The Princess
22:32
Speaker 1: and the Frog and was like, maybe it can work
22:34
Speaker 1: for me. Wasn't there a Disney Channel movie where with
22:37
Speaker 1: Tyra Banks where she's like a doll like, oh yeah,
22:40
Speaker 1: oh my god, what was that? What was that called
22:44
Speaker 1: model behavior? That was every life size? Life Size? I
22:49
Speaker 1: love that you two were the ones that came up
22:51
Speaker 1: with two both when he Lohan was in it. Yeah, right,
22:57
Speaker 1: oh life Size that was a great movie. Did you
22:59
Speaker 1: guys are play with barbies or something that you you know,
23:03
Speaker 1: gender rules have been changed a lot, but did you
23:07
Speaker 1: guys ever play with things that weren't supposed to be
23:11
Speaker 1: fairy ball as when you were younger? I will admit
23:14
Speaker 1: I did play with my sisters dolls, but not alone.
23:17
Speaker 1: My sister was also playing. That's cute, that's really sweet, right,
23:20
Speaker 1: what would you guys like, what would they do? We
23:23
Speaker 1: just like played house with the dolls. Huh. I would
23:26
Speaker 1: be the boy dolls and she would be the barbie dolls.
23:28
Speaker 1: I had a lot of Barbies and I would just
23:29
Speaker 1: kill them all. Like it was just like, what kind
23:31
Speaker 1: of scenario can this person die? Yeah? I was scarred
23:36
Speaker 1: at a young age by chucky you know, child's playing,
23:38
Speaker 1: so like any kind of doll that my sister had
23:41
Speaker 1: was terrifying for me. I am the youngest and I
23:45
Speaker 1: have three older brothers, and my mom was so over
23:48
Speaker 1: the moon about having a girl that she really pushed
23:51
Speaker 1: the feminine thing on me and was just like, you're
23:53
Speaker 1: gonna wear dressed every day and I'm gonna brease your
23:55
Speaker 1: hair and it's gonna be suck cute um. And I
23:58
Speaker 1: totally revolted, which is like now I'm like, yeah, but
24:02
Speaker 1: I hated dolls and it makes sense. I just tried
24:04
Speaker 1: to murder all my barbies and chop their hair off.
24:06
Speaker 1: And my grandma like American girl dolls, and whenever we
24:10
Speaker 1: would go to my grandma's house, you had like a
24:11
Speaker 1: room just like it was the most terrifying as a
24:15
Speaker 1: child to see. I don't get it. I don't get
24:17
Speaker 1: why kids love dolls. They are really inherently just creepy. Yeah,
24:22
Speaker 1: Like you don't have to watch Annabelle to think that
24:24
Speaker 1: this doll is creepy. Right. I was inns on action
24:28
Speaker 1: figures like everything. I was big on superheroes. I'm still
24:33
Speaker 1: big on subaros, and I'd have like huge battles in
24:36
Speaker 1: my room. Oh yeah. And one day when I came
24:38
Speaker 1: home from school, like in like sixth grade, I was
24:41
Speaker 1: like way too old. My mom and dad said they
24:43
Speaker 1: got rid of them. What's just because that was the
24:46
Speaker 1: only way to transition me off of the action cold Turkey. Yeah.
24:50
Speaker 1: And then when we moved out, I found a box
24:52
Speaker 1: in our attic with all the toys score. Um, were
24:55
Speaker 1: you devastated? Yeah? I was heartbroken, but there was no
24:57
Speaker 1: other way to like make me stop playing with them.
25:00
Speaker 1: Oh moham, that makes me really sad for you. No,
25:05
Speaker 1: but it worked. He and then I gave them to
25:07
Speaker 1: my nephews. Were you really upset with your parents? Like?
25:09
Speaker 1: Did you talk to them for a couple of days?
25:11
Speaker 1: I got over it quicker than I thought. I feel
25:13
Speaker 1: like this is like parents taking away their kids Halloween candy.
25:17
Speaker 1: It's quite sad. Sugar is not good for kids. No,
25:20
Speaker 1: neither is playing with Okay, real quick. I had a
25:23
Speaker 1: Halloween party a couple of years ago and everyone was
25:25
Speaker 1: supposed to come with the costume. Mohan's already rolling his eyes.
25:28
Speaker 1: Mohan came in a Wolverine onesie and even had the
25:33
Speaker 1: claws made out of cardboard and tinfoil, and he walked
25:37
Speaker 1: around with him all night long. It was when holding
25:40
Speaker 1: onto his cups mean I can't get claws, or just
25:44
Speaker 1: like yeah, so you know, I'm really digging work these
25:47
Speaker 1: days and you looked psychotic. I had to folk make
25:50
Speaker 1: because you're gonna give me cramp for not like making
25:53
Speaker 1: a cool right, no matter what you would have. So
25:55
Speaker 1: I wore like it was like a zip up thing
25:57
Speaker 1: with the hood, and then I had to do I
26:00
Speaker 1: had to make the close. Yeah, but I just thought
26:03
Speaker 1: it was funny. All Right, it's the time for secure
26:05
Speaker 1: the bag. Let's secure the bag. Let's d m's closed. Well,
26:12
Speaker 1: all right, so I'm at the betting going on these days.
26:16
Speaker 1: I mean, I guess we're doing futures. So that's what
26:17
Speaker 1: we're gonna do right now. Um. We already talked about
26:20
Speaker 1: this earlier in the episode, but I think we should
26:22
Speaker 1: update this every single week. Will they won't they? Aaron
26:24
Speaker 1: Rodgers retiring and Tom Brady retiring, I think that that's
26:27
Speaker 1: pretty fun. Aaron Rodgers is still favored to return to
26:30
Speaker 1: Green Bay, I believe. Um, I think he retires. Tom Brady,
26:36
Speaker 1: are there any odds on him coming back to those exist?
26:40
Speaker 1: Have you heard about that? Bo Um? Yeah, I'm sure
26:43
Speaker 1: they do. But the forty nine ers as a real thing.
26:47
Speaker 1: Forty nine ers Tom Brady? Yeah, for Garoppolo, I guess
26:50
Speaker 1: the math on like his rights and then the forty
26:54
Speaker 1: nine Ers are trying to trade Jimmy g they match up.
26:57
Speaker 1: I don't think that Tom Brady's done playing. Trying to
26:59
Speaker 1: look up Brady these next team odds and the NFL
27:03
Speaker 1: WiFi has blocked this site. That's um. I think that
27:09
Speaker 1: Tom Brady's coming back. I don't know where it see.
27:11
Speaker 1: It feels weird to me that he wouldn't just come
27:12
Speaker 1: back with the Bucks. He's got no I mean, not
27:15
Speaker 1: that we've heard of real issues with the team or
27:17
Speaker 1: the coach. He's already settled in with the players. Um.
27:22
Speaker 1: He he lives there now, he's got kids, his wife
27:25
Speaker 1: probably doesn't want to move again. They just moved. Why
27:26
Speaker 1: would you want to change teams again, and especially with
27:29
Speaker 1: forty nine ers. Well, there's all these reports coming out
27:33
Speaker 1: about Tom Brady has problems with the way the Bucks
27:36
Speaker 1: organization is run, and Bruce Arians is like, that's not true.
27:40
Speaker 1: And there's a report that Brady and Byron Leftwich would
27:43
Speaker 1: put game plans together and Bruce Arians would come in
27:46
Speaker 1: at the last second and didn't hear any of this stuff,
27:48
Speaker 1: take a red pen to them and change everything. Maybe
27:51
Speaker 1: there's a little rift forming. Bruce Arians said, it's all nonsense.
27:54
Speaker 1: But yeah, of course, what else is he going to say?
27:56
Speaker 1: And Brady um is from the Bay Area. Yeah, I
27:59
Speaker 1: could him wanting to come home. Yeah, maybe his parents
28:01
Speaker 1: still live out here, but they just drafted Trey Lance.
28:03
Speaker 1: They trade it up. Lance hurt right now, he's got hurt?
28:07
Speaker 1: You did he pretty sure? Wow? I just am hearing
28:11
Speaker 1: that he's not ready? Yeah? Um, yeah, I think that
28:14
Speaker 1: that's why a lot of people, Um, okay, another couple
28:19
Speaker 1: of fun little I guess we get. I don't even
28:22
Speaker 1: know if you could call these props. But future is
28:24
Speaker 1: will Sean McVay coach the Rams for Game one next season? Uh.
28:28
Speaker 1: Peter King says he could be offered up to fifteen
28:31
Speaker 1: million dollars free television gig, which I think is what
28:34
Speaker 1: people are thinking that he might go and do, which
28:36
Speaker 1: he'd be great at. Oh my god, the amount of
28:39
Speaker 1: dippity duegel he would be able to put in his
28:41
Speaker 1: hair for every single show. Um, he's so young, he's
28:44
Speaker 1: thirty six. He's already won? Is he thirty seven? Now? Whatever,
28:47
Speaker 1: he's already won a super Bowl? Why not go away
28:50
Speaker 1: and make some fifteen million dollars? He's making about eight
28:54
Speaker 1: and a half with the Rams right now, he is
28:56
Speaker 1: thirty six, just turned. I would love to retire at
29:00
Speaker 1: thirty six, Oh my gosh, he would. I would love
29:03
Speaker 1: to take a deal worth fifteen million a year at
29:05
Speaker 1: thirty six, where you have you go, spend time with
29:07
Speaker 1: your family, You don't have to stay at your football
29:09
Speaker 1: facility until ten pm making game plans like he did
29:13
Speaker 1: the Super Bowl. I think I think you should do it.
29:15
Speaker 1: I think you should retire. But then also the Aaron
29:17
Speaker 1: Donald run it back, run it back, It didn't really
29:19
Speaker 1: sound like he's ready to be done. But he's thirty six,
29:22
Speaker 1: he's already won a Super Bowl. Why not go and
29:24
Speaker 1: do TV secure that bag literally and then come back.
29:29
Speaker 1: All these NFL coaches are so old. Ye come back.
29:32
Speaker 1: Even if if you come back in twenty years, you're
29:33
Speaker 1: still gonna be one of the youngest coaches. That's actually
29:35
Speaker 1: crazy to think about. Um, I just should go come
29:39
Speaker 1: back to like the best best scenario, like you'll have
29:41
Speaker 1: your pick. Yeah, we think he should go, but will
29:43
Speaker 1: he I don't think so. I don't think so. Um,
29:48
Speaker 1: all right, he's not securing the bag, I guess. And
29:49
Speaker 1: then will Aaron Donald retire? I think he kind of
29:51
Speaker 1: already told us that he's not going to right, He's
29:53
Speaker 1: gonna run it back. Right. He saw them at the
29:55
Speaker 1: parade chanting run it back yeah, and he said, uh,
29:58
Speaker 1: he's gonna come back, making McVeagh comes back. Oh so
30:02
Speaker 1: little double duty. I think they both come back. Yeah.
30:05
Speaker 1: Do you think Rams get back into the Super Bowl
30:06
Speaker 1: next year? I don't think so. No, no, no no. Um.
30:10
Speaker 1: All right, so that's secure the bag. Hopefully the bags
30:13
Speaker 1: are secured. Except for Sean McVay. Well, he's still making
30:15
Speaker 1: eight half million dollars. I think he is. Let's talk
30:18
Speaker 1: about the best things that we heard or saw this week.
30:21
Speaker 1: He's the bast oh ah e ob J had his baby.
30:29
Speaker 1: Ob J had his baby, and he left Cleveland behind.
30:34
Speaker 1: He said, mohn, you're a loser. I'm not gonna play
30:37
Speaker 1: for that round. Then, mom, I'm gonna go. He had
30:40
Speaker 1: his baby. Guys, very sweet. Do you see him with
30:43
Speaker 1: his like crazy leg cast on right now? He's got
30:46
Speaker 1: a little baby. Um. He posted some very lovely things. Uh.
30:50
Speaker 1: He also posted a picture of his mirror in his bathroom.
30:53
Speaker 1: Did you guys see that? It was really cool? You
30:55
Speaker 1: had written on it like I'm gonna be a super
30:57
Speaker 1: Bowl champion, I'm gonna win the super Bowl, all these
30:59
Speaker 1: really cool, like manifesting things. I'm happy for him. Stop it,
31:01
Speaker 1: you're happy for him to say it. We don't be
31:05
Speaker 1: a baby. I hope he comes back healthy. That's all
31:07
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say. Yeah, for sure, injury suck. All of
31:09
Speaker 1: us want him to come back healthy. But so he
31:13
Speaker 1: had his baby. Van Jefferson had his baby and named
31:16
Speaker 1: him Champ. Great name for ball. Just the stars aligned
31:21
Speaker 1: on that one. Yeah, baby born at the super Bowl.
31:25
Speaker 1: Dad wins the super Bowl, named him Champ. Great, great job. Um, okay,
31:30
Speaker 1: so that's all the fun stuff. Let's get to the
31:32
Speaker 1: worst thing that I heard all week. Greg Rosenthal, friend
31:38
Speaker 1: of a friend of the pot. I guess, well not anymore.
31:42
Speaker 1: Greg Rosenthal from around the NFL, one of my co
31:46
Speaker 1: hosts on game Debut during the regular season. I guess.
31:49
Speaker 1: He puts out an article at the end of each
31:51
Speaker 1: season every week, actually every week, right, but this is
31:54
Speaker 1: like the big one where he's ranking all the quarterbacks. Yes,
31:57
Speaker 1: this is the wrap up, the final post. This is
31:59
Speaker 1: the final this is what I think about every single
32:02
Speaker 1: quarterback this season. And he put Baker Mayfield at twenty fifth,
32:08
Speaker 1: and I'm not happy about it. I feel like he
32:11
Speaker 1: did not take into account the injuries, the COVID, the drama,
32:18
Speaker 1: the OBJ of it all, the Obj's dad of it all,
32:22
Speaker 1: the Kareem Hun's dad of it all. Who who are
32:28
Speaker 1: the seven behind him? Well? He actually ranked sixty two
32:33
Speaker 1: quarterbacks because he ranked um every quarterback who started a
32:38
Speaker 1: game this season? Whoa, which is quite an undertaking. Good
32:41
Speaker 1: job Greg? Whoa good job Greg? Also bad job Um?
32:46
Speaker 1: And then also we heard this week or last week,
32:50
Speaker 1: I can't remember, Jake Trotter from ESPN said it wouldn't
32:52
Speaker 1: be surprising if the Browns kicked the tires on the
32:57
Speaker 1: viability of a trade for the likes of Aaron Rodgers,
32:59
Speaker 1: Russell Wilson or even Kirk Cousins. Would you prefer Baker
33:02
Speaker 1: Mayfield over all three of those guys? Be honest, I
33:06
Speaker 1: have no answer. No, it's fine, Greg, It's fine. Twenty five,
33:11
Speaker 1: little brutal next year, Baker's season. Nothing against Jake Trotter here,
33:15
Speaker 1: but what is this? Is this a report? Is this
33:18
Speaker 1: an opinion? It wouldn't be if the Browns kicked the
33:21
Speaker 1: tires on Tom. Yeah, no, no kidding, Baker didn't have
33:24
Speaker 1: a great year, not kicked the tires. It doesn't mean
33:27
Speaker 1: they're gonna go. Let me tell you about a gentle
33:29
Speaker 1: laxative folks to Brady coming to the Browns. Yeah, I'm
33:32
Speaker 1: okay with it. I'd rather have him than any I'm
33:35
Speaker 1: looking at this list. I'm looking at this list. There's
33:38
Speaker 1: some of the quarterbacks that were ahead of being Yeah, okay,
33:40
Speaker 1: Carson wentz oh boy and uh nineteen, Teddy Bridgewater at eighteen. Uh,
33:47
Speaker 1: like Matt Ryan was in great and it just basic.
33:53
Speaker 1: We didn't have Greg on this podcast. We should do that. Yeah, Baker,
33:55
Speaker 1: Jimmy ge was twenty, he should have been much higher.
33:58
Speaker 1: Baker's one spot above Tyler hunt By. So that's like
34:00
Speaker 1: the tier that Greg sees him again right now, jamis
34:04
Speaker 1: to Jared Goff, Daniel Jones, Baker or this that tier.
34:10
Speaker 1: I'm done with you, Greg, worst thing I saw all week.
34:13
Speaker 1: Your list probably put a lot of effort into a
34:16
Speaker 1: good job. But whatever, um, guys, that's our show. We're
34:19
Speaker 1: just doing a little quick Well actually, we set out
34:21
Speaker 1: to make this quick and it wasn't very quick because
34:22
Speaker 1: Block says thirty five got oh, it's not too bad, guys,
34:26
Speaker 1: We're gonna be coming back every single week and talking nonsense,
34:28
Speaker 1: and honestly, I feel like these shows are going to
34:30
Speaker 1: be more fun because we don't have you know, there's
34:33
Speaker 1: no football on rails. We just talk whatever we want.
34:35
Speaker 1: We are absolutely going to be doing an Oscar's Pool.
34:39
Speaker 1: What should we say? We all need to watch the
34:41
Speaker 1: movies now for talking about it. You're right, we're gonna
34:44
Speaker 1: do an Oscars episode. I'm going to the combine. I'm
34:47
Speaker 1: gonna interview some fun guys who are going to turn
34:49
Speaker 1: into superstars. That's gonna be pretty cool and it'll be great.
34:53
Speaker 1: So don't forget to subscribe to the show. Follow us
34:55
Speaker 1: on Instagram and Twitter at Benched underscore Pod to see
34:57
Speaker 1: the videos clips we talk about each week with your
34:59
Speaker 1: own eyeballs gentile axative. I'll see you next week. Five
35:08
Speaker 1: h