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Lift, Love, Live: The Diva’s Guide to Fitness, Libido & Longevity After 50 · The Diva Details

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Welcome to the Diva Details. Welcome to the Diva Details.
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Where bold, confident women embrace life unapologetically.
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From love and sex to wellness and reinvention. We keep it.
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Well, hello, this is Diva Mia. Today, we're going to talk a little bit more
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about health in our 50s and 60s, as well as your fitness, your libido,
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and your longevity long term. So let's dive right in.
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So health after 50, it's not about doing more.
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It's about listening to your body more and figuring out what actually works
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with you because everybody's body's different.
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And I think a lot of times we push our bodies like we did in our 20s or 30s,
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and we try to get the same results and it doesn't work.
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You try and you try, but it doesn't work. And what can happen is you can create cortisol in your body.
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You can even burn out because fitness is a strategy, especially after 50.
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You really have to work with what your body's capable of because the more stress
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you have, the more cortisol you create and the more weight you'll gain from it.
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And then when it comes to your libido, your libido doesn't change just because of your age.
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It usually changes is because of stress, because of hormonal imbalances,
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maybe because you're inflamed or exhausted or just burnt out.
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So let's get more into this and let's figure out the way to fix this so we feel
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better, we live longer, and we have better sex because it's all about that too.
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So let's talk about medicine.
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Medicine is there to help us, especially when it comes to hormones.
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Hormones can help with your libido, it can help with your longevity,
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and it can help with your health. But sexual health is also health.
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And so we're going to cover that today, too. Longevity requires regulating your hormones.
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It requires not punishing yourself because you slipped up or because you didn't do something 100%.
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Be graceful with yourself. Give yourself some grace. Because when you're in
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your 40s, 50s, and 60s, you're going to find your body may ache a little bit more than it used to.
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You might have joint problems, a little bit of arthritis here and there, some inflammation.
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There's things we can use to counteract that, but you still need to take care
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of your body the way it is because it is a little bit older.
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And there are things you can do to try to help with your mitochondria and improve that function.
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There's NAD, NAD+, and with your joints, you can take hyaluronic acid.
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There's things you can do to help. But let's not just run to a pharmacy every
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single time. Let's see what we can do with other things.
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So let's start off with the most important thing. This is important for sexual
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health. This is important for physical health and longevity.
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Women, we need to lift weights. And you should have been lifting weights since
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you were younger. But if you haven't, now's the time to start.
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Don't feel like it's too late.
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Because I know a bodybuilder that didn't start really lifting until she was 69 and now she's 73.
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And she's competing now in professional bodybuilding competitions.
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So it is never too late to start lifting weights, okay? You need to make sure
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that you're trying to preserve your muscle.
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Because every year, you start to lose muscle. And you can lose a pound or two of muscle every year.
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That's not a good place to be. Because once you lose muscle,
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your metabolism will slow down.
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You're not going to be as fit. You're not going to be as healthy.
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And everything will hurt more.
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So let's remember, we're going to regain muscle. And muscle is a good thing.
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Don't worry about bulking up. It would take a lot for a woman to get big like a guy.
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We don't have as much testosterone as men, naturally.
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Even when you're on testosterone supplementation, you're not getting the same level that men are.
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The other thing is that muscle helps improve insulin sensitivity.
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If you've got fat around the middle, you're most likely having insulin sensitivity, that issue there.
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And your cortisol is mostly too high. So when you lift weights,
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as long as you don't overstress yourself and cause a spike in cortisol,
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it's going to help support your hormone balance and help you lose weight around the middle.
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It's also going to increase your confidence in libido. I will say that the less
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weight I have and the thinner I get, the more confidence I have.
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My libido definitely goes up, although it was pretty high already,
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but it definitely goes up.
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Lift heavy, and lift heavy enough to feel like you're doing something.
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I always say if you don't have a little bit of pain after you left the gym,
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you probably didn't work out hard enough.
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You've got to lift enough to signal that you're trying to strengthen the muscle,
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but not stress it, not tear it, not injure yourself.
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And that's why hiring a trainer in your 40s, 50s, and 60s, even if you know
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how to lift weights, is a really good idea.
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Because here's the other thing. When you hire a trainer, they're going to make sure you show up.
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So I like my trainer because it's an accountability partner.
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I'm guaranteed a minimum of three workouts a week, even if I'm not feeling the
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best, even if I'm tired, even if I want to stay home.
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With my trainer, I'm guaranteed to make it. That's the good thing about hiring a trainer as well.
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They will keep you on target and keep you focused. Muscle is your longevity organ.
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And no one ever talks about this, but muscle, the more muscle you have,
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the longer you're going to live and the better quality of life you're going to have.
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If you have a lot of muscle, if you've seen people in their 70s,
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80s, and 90s even now that look
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really good, they all have one thing in common, and they are muscular.
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And their bodies aren't slouched over. They don't look frail and weak,
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and it's because they have muscle.
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Now's the time to start. Yesterday would have been better, but today's a great
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day because tomorrow may be too late.
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So just remember, start now, start today. You don't have to go to the gym.
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There's a lot of body weight movements where you use your body weight to grow
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muscle as well. There's things you can do.
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I know a lot of women in our age group, all they want to do is yoga and jump around.
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It kills me to see because they wonder why they don't lose weight.
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They're not losing weight because they're not adding muscle mass.
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It's not that you want to lose weight anyway. it's what you want to look better.
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You want to improve your body. You want to improve the shape of the body.
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When you improve the shape of the body by lifting muscle mass,
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you may increase your weight, but you'll look skinnier and thinner and more toned than ever before.
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Cortisol for people our age is a big one. And if you over-exercise,
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it will actually cause you to gain weight.
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Cortisol spikes in the morning, but it spikes more easily in our 50s as well.
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And so recovery takes longer when you have a cortisol spike. If you injure yourself,
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you're spiking cortisol. And too much cardio or HIIT training,
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which is high-intensity training, will cause fat storage in your belly.
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If you have a lot of belly fat, that's what it means. It means that you have stress.
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It takes longer to really work that stress belly fat out.
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You might have to do some intermittent fasting in order to get rid of that belly fat.
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You may need to up your magnesium. There's lots of things, approaches.
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You need to decrease your cortisol first and foremost, or it's not going to work, though.
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Anytime you're fatigued and exhausted, that's a spike in cortisol, too.
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If you're overworking at the office and working too much and stressed about
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finances or stressed about your health or stressed about your relationships,
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that's going to spike your cortisol.
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You're going to gain weight. It's kind of funny. I talk to people and they're
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like, why do people lose weight after they get out of a bad relationship?
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The reason is, is because their cortisol drops. A lot of people realize they
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have less stress being single than they had in that relationship.
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Not everybody, but a lot of people do. A lot of it has to do that they're not
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working out more. They're just, their cortisol is going down.
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Their bellies are getting thinner. There's some common mistakes that we need
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to talk about. The first is daily intense workouts.
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HIIT training is great if you want to do it one to two times a week,
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but don't do it every single day.
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High intensity training is where you go really, really, really hard and then
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you take a break and then go really, really, really hard three or four times.
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You get your heart rate up to like 80th percentile.
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It's fine to do. It's good for your cardiovascular.
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It's good to burn belly fat, But if you're doing it every single day,
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you're going to have cortisol spikes.
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When we're in our 30s, 40s, actually 40s, 50s, and 60s, our bodies can't handle
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that high-intensity workouts.
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They don't want you to work out three or four hours a day.
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If you wonder why you're going to the gym three or four hours a day and you're still fat, there you go.
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If you're going to the gym three or four hours a day and you have not lost weight,
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it's because you're working out too much. It's called overtraining.
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You can also have fasted overtraining. You don't eat, you don't eat,
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you don't eat. you go to the gym on an empty stomach.
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And then you in high intensity workout, it's okay to go for a walk fasted.
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But when you're doing a high intensity workout, if you over train,
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you're really stressing your body.
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And if you forget to ignore sleep and recovery, sleep is so important,
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guys, I will tell you, I have big challenges with sleep.
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In fact, if I could just take a week off and sleep, I would just be so happy.
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But sleep for me has always been a challenge. Sleep and recovery are very important as well.
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Sleep is when you lose weight. A lot of people don't realize most of your weight
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that you lose is at night when you're sleeping.
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You work your body during the day, but when you sleep is when you actually lose the weight.
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That's why you could go to bed two pounds a lot heavier, and then the morning
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you wake up and say, how did I lose two pounds? You lost the weight in your
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sleep, which is kind of nice too.
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But if you're not sleeping enough, what will happen? Your cortisol will go up,
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which means your insulin will go up, which means you're going to store everything
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you eat. It's troubling.
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Even when you're fasting, you can have cortisol spikes because you're fasting too much.
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So if your workouts are stressing you out, your body's going to hold on to that
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weight. It usually holds on to the weight around the middle.
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Remember that you need to take it easy on yourself.
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You need to be kind to yourself. The best exercise after 50,
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so I'm going to give it to you here. Here's your breakdown.
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You're going to want to work out three to four times a week strength training.
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Now, I was doing six times a week, and I realized I was overstressing my body.
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Now, I'm about three to four times a week, usually almost always three,
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and sometimes There are instances where I will do a five, but it's not high intensity.
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Three times a week, strength training. Then every day, I think you should be
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able to walk or swim or do Pilates.
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You should be doing some type of softer exercise.
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And bury it up because when you work different muscle groups,
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like maybe one day you walk and another day you do Pilates and the next day you swim.
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Now, Pilates can also be weight training depending on how you do it.
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It can be a lot of body weight training. Two to three days a week minimum,
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more likely it's best if you at least get the 30-minute to an hour walk-in every day.
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Walking is one of the best exercises, especially when you do it on an empty
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stomach to lose belly fat.
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Then once to twice a week, you should do some type of mobility, some type of yoga.
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You could do yoga more than that, but you need it at least a couple times a
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week to keep your flexibility, to keep your mobility.
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It's restorative to the body. When you stretch and breathe and relax,
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and some people follow yoga up with meditation because they're already relaxed,
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they're in a state, and then they meditate.
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Some people will do like 30 minutes of yoga every single night to calm down
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and relieve some stress.
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That helps as well because then you sleep better.
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Anything you can do to decrease stress and cortisol is great.
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But these are the minimums. Now, I don't think you should be training.
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You should never train with weight seven days a week. If you have a week where
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you train five days and the next week you go back to three or four, that's great.
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But don't be doing overtraining and don't push it so hard.
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Then two to three times a week minimum you should be walking.
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You could do two to three times a week swimming. But try to make sure that you keep your body moving.
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Because if you don't move it, you lose it. When you don't move something,
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you lose it. That's the old saying we have from the, if you don't move it, you lose it. It's true.
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We also have the saying, no pain, no gain. But when you're in your 50s,
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it's going to change a little bit. that no pain could be a detriment to you.
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Don't try to push the no pain, no gain, but do push yourself in the gym.
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Push yourself in the weight room.
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Try to gain as much muscle mass as you can, but you're going to have to feed that muscle mass too.
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Don't forget your protein. Your protein is so important.
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If you're not losing weight, you might have too many carbs in your diet.
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So look at your diet, look at your carb intake, and just focus on protein.
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If you can eat more protein and you protein load your meals and try not to eat
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too late at night because your body needs the time to process.
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If you can do protein, eat earlier in the day, not so late at night.
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Try not to eat after 6. I don't know why.
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Most restaurants for dinner, they don't open until 5. It's hard to make an earlier reservation.
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But a lot of dinner restaurants, they open so late and they stay so late.
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It's so unhealthy to eat that late at night. It's not good for you.
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Just remember that as well.
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Try to eat earlier in the day so your body has time to digest the food before
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you go to sleep so it can truly rest at night.
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Then your libido will also drop as you get older. And this is how you reverse
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it. You gotta keep the cortisol low. I think I'm harping a lot on cortisol.
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The cortisol is such a chronic stress hormone. It affects autoimmunes. It affects everything.
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If you have an autoimmune disease, you've had chronic stress for some time.
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You've been stressed out and something triggered that in order to turn over
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to an autoimmune disease.
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But you've had a lot of cortisol and chronic stress, and that's what happens
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to people with autoimmunes.
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Decrease your stress. Decrease your cortisol and keep it low.
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Your libido also goes down when you have low testosterone. Women, we need it.
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We need testosterone. I'm sorry. We do. Now, if you have a libido,
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it may also be because you're in a relationship that's not very loving,
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which is also causing you stress.
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That can impact it. Get on the right hormones, get some testosterone,
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check your estrogen, check your progesterone, because those affect libido as well.
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And then sleep. Yes, sleep is right there as well.
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We always want sleep to make sure that we rest and relax, because if you get
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good sleep, your libido is going to increase.
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You're going to be more inclined to be in the mood, if you will.
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Men, if your women aren't in the mood, are they getting enough sleep?
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Are they on the correct testosterone? Are they on the correct estrogen?
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Are they stressed out? Are you helping relieve some of their stress?
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Then blood flow. I mean, if you don't have enough blood flow,
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I know I have low blood pressure.
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Sometimes I have a little bit of a low blood flow, but you don't have blood flow to the area.
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There's things called the O-shot that can increase blood flow to the clitoris
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and can increase blood flow to the G-spots.
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Remember, there's things you can do to help with your blood flow. Then body confidence.
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This is one thing I think women, as we get older, we're more confident in our
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body. We're kind of like, take it or leave it. If you don't like it, move on.
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Body confidence is something that you need to work on. If you're not confident,
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maybe you need to work out in the gym and feel better.
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But I think if you're healthy and your body's functioning well,
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you should be as confident as you can because this is all you got. This is your body.
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You can change it the way you choose to, but this is your body.
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So try to make it work for you the way you need it to work for you.
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Libido is not in your head, though. It's part of your nervous system.
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If you don't feel safe or you're stressed out or your partner is making you
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feel uncomfortable and you're in a happy relationship, your libido is going to go down the drain.
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I know that it happened to me. You've got to understand that your libido will
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do better if you're in a very safe relationship.
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To increase your libido naturally you're going to have to reduce
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stress first and don't add coffee if
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you've got a that's a stimulant any stimulants will will cause
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your stress to be elevated then improve circulation getting massages helps restore
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your feeling of safety if you're feeling uncomfortable with your partner or
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if they're not making you feel safe at home once you leave that relationship
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your libido may spike and energy in your body may come back and you may lose
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a bunch of weight too because your cortisol goes down.
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Remember that your libido will naturally come back as you feel more and more safe.
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A relaxed body, though, I'm going to tell you, when you're relaxed,
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you'll be receptive to a lot more things than if you are stressed out. That's the truth.
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If you can relax, you will be much more inclined to be with a partner.
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And now let's talk about your pelvic floor.
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A lot of people don't feel comfortable in their pelvic floor area because after
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50, they can have some issues.
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Sometimes your bladder or your bowel control goes away.
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Might have been because you had children. Your orgasm strength,
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it could be enhanced or it could be less.
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I mean, for me, my orgasm strength went up, but for other people,
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your orgasm strength may have decreased.
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If you need to improve your, the more you improve your pelvic floor,
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the more your posture improves, the more your core improves,
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and it will reduce pain and prolapse.
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So prolapse is where your pelvic floor starts to fall.
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You don't want your pelvic floor to fall because every organs are,
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all in there. So prolapse is very important. Prolapse happens when your parts
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of your organs start to fall and get misplaced because you're not strong inside.
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You've got to keep that pelvic floor tight.
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You've got to keep it strong. The more strong it is, the more responsive it
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is to orgasms, the more flexible it will be, the stronger it will be,
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the more coordinated you will be, and the better your sex will be, honestly.
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A clenched pelvic floor isn't, it's not powerful, it's exhausting.
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So if you're uptight about something, if you're stressed, it's not going to be tiring.
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But you want a strong pelvic floor, not something that's constantly clenched.
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So to strengthen your pelvic floor, there's different ways to do it.
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You do slow controlled contractions. You breathe in a coordinated movement.
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Then you need to avoid overclenching your pelvic floor. It should take about
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five to ten minutes a day. And you can integrate pelvic floor.
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You can actually do your pelvic floor training when you're strength training
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as well. You can do it when you're relaxing.
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You can do it when you're doing yoga. It doesn't take a lot to strengthen your
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pelvic floor and to tighten the muscles within your pelvic floor.
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There's also now a machine that helps
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people with posture and pelvic floor weaknesses. It's called Aim Strong.
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There's people that are promoting these and using them. I haven't used them personally myself.
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But it does tighten and strengthen your pelvic floor. Now let's go back to hormones
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a little bit because hormones help with longevity.
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One of the top three foods for your longevity and your hormones is wild salmon.
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It decreases inflammation. It's gonna help your blood flow and it helps with
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your libido. It's kind of an all across the board.
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If you have it two to three times a week, wild salmon is great.
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It's better than farm-raised salmon too because sometimes the farm-raised salmons
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can have different types of chemicals from runoff.
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Eggs are great too. It's protein for your muscles. If you're building muscle
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mass, it's going to be great for making you feel stronger.
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It's one of the perfect foods out there.
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Cholesterol is great for hormone production. I know people are always afraid
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about cholesterol, but it actually does help regulate your hormones.
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It will help with your brain and sexual health too.
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So I would say try to get four to eight eggs in a week.
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And I know egg prices have fluctuated, but I'd say four to eight eggs and it
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will make you feel better. And then beets.
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Red beets are great. If you juice, they have nitric oxide. They help clean the
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blood. They help with stamina and circulation.
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And also beets help with sexual arousal. I didn't know that until recently,
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but I've been eating a lot of beets.
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There's that. You can have beets three to four times a week. I like to juice mine.
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Some people roast them. It's your preference, really, but beets are really good.
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Add them to a salad if you like.
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Then magnesium glycinate. This one is huge.
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I can't say enough about magnesium glycinate.
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Magnesium glycinate is a cortisol reducer. And we have so much cortisol as women
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just running around, taking care of the kids, taking care of the house,
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then running our businesses and taking care of everything.
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Magnesium glycine is one of the most important magnesiums you can take.
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It will reduce your cortisol. It's going to help with muscle recovery and it's
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going to help with your sleep.
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It's really good to take at night. Try not to take it during the day because
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you need it at night. It will help with your libido support too.
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There's a magnesium, I believe, glycinate that's called Calm.
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There's different types of magnesium. And there's like seven or eight different
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types of magnesium, if I'm correct.
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Take the magnesium glycinate. It's a different form of magnesium.
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It's not just magnesium. Some people say, I have magnesium, but do you have
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magnesium glycinate? Then take it every day.
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This you can take every single day. And most people are magnesium deficient.
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Taking magnesium every day is a good thing for you. Then zinc.
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Zinc is good for women too because a lot of us are testosterone deficient and
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we need zinc in order to help.
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It will help our immune health. It's going to help our libido.
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Zinc can be taken three to five times a week depending on how it will.
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You'll see a boost in zinc with zinc usually pretty quickly if it's a zinc deficiency
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that you're suffering from.
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Then spearmint or peppermint tea, that helps with your hormonal balance.
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It reduces bloating, helps clean out your liver, helps with inflammation.
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I can't say enough about peppermint tea. also refreshes your energy levels.
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You'll just feel more inspired.
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I think peppermint tea is great. You can take it at night, but I think it's
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best in the morning. You can do one, two cups a day. You can also do green tea.
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Green tea helps with that as well. Helps regulate your hormones and decrease inflammation.
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And then hibiscus. What a great flower. Hibiscus is actually a flower and it
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helps with your circulation. It helps with your blood pressure and your sexual
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vitality. If you're a woman or a man that has high blood pressure,
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some hibiscus tea would help.
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You can do one cup daily or every other day. It depends on what you need and what you require.
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Pibiscus is a wonderful tea. Then ashwagandha tea.
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Ashwagandha is a great tea to help lower cortisol.
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It's going to help with improving the libido and it's going to help with your stamina.
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One of the things it also does is it supports the nervous system.
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That will help you calm down if you've been in a stressful situation,
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if you have autoimmune issues.
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Ashwagandha is a great thing to help calm your nervous system.
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You can do one cup of tea in the evenings.
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It's a more of a relaxing type of tea, ashwagandha tea is.
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But overall, your longevity is about self-regulation of your immune system,
21:20
self-regulation of your nervous system, but it's not about deprivation.
21:23
The key to longevity after 50 is to build your muscle, increase your stress, and sleep very deeply.
21:32
I would recommend getting either a sleep ring or a sleep watch that tracks your
21:35
sleep as well so you actually know how much you're sleeping.
21:38
I was shocked to find out I was only sleeping three to four hours a
21:41
night until I got the ring and now I've got it up to about five
21:44
and a half to six but I wasn't sleeping well at all so
21:47
get a sleep watch get a sleep ring even if you're in bed
21:49
for eight hours you may be only getting four hours of sleep then you
21:52
need to eat to support your hormones eat foods that help decrease estrogen if
21:57
you're high on estrogen if you're estrogen dominant then keep pleasure in your
22:00
life in our 40s 50s and 60s I think some women kind of check out as far as pleasure
22:06
there's nothing wrong with having pleasure and joy whether it's from yourself from a man.
22:11
Keep that in your life because longevity is not just about adding years.
22:14
It's about adding quality to your life. It truly is.
22:18
Health doesn't disappear at 50. It demands respect and it demands that we move
22:22
forward in an educated way.
22:25
And take care of ourselves in a way that we can live healthy and strong into
22:29
our 70s, 80s, and 90s and beyond because there's people in there over 100 that
22:34
are still running out there.
22:36
Strength and sexuality and vitality are not bonuses. It's your birthright.
22:40
It's your job to make this happen for you. You have the best quality of life possible.
22:45
It will also help stave off dementia the stronger you are in your body.
22:49
You don't need to punish your body to transform it. You just need to be its partner.
22:53
You need to love your body. You need to give it some grace. This will help you grow.
22:57
This will help you maintain the vitality that you need and that you want into
23:02
your older, older years. I hope this helped.
23:05
There's many supplements out there that you can take.
23:09
I'm probably going to do a podcast just on supplements and a podcast just on
23:13
food and a podcast on tea.
23:14
You can have that across the board, but I wanted to give you just a brief summary
23:19
to help you grow and help your body transition as you go through life.
23:24
So remember hormones, supplementation, food, and exercise.
23:28
And that will help your body grow and maintain a healthy lifestyle.
23:32
This is Diva Mia. Have a wonderful day.
23:36
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