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The Mission of Your Marriage · Relationship Talk Thursday

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Speaker 1: You know, people under estimate if you get married. The
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Speaker 1: wedding is a test ground for how you work together.
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Speaker 1: It's the first budget you have to navigate. It's the
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Speaker 1: first relations social experiment of your two sizes of the world. It's,
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Speaker 1: you know, the first opportunity for agreement and disagreement and
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Speaker 1: picking a color scheme and who's gonna do wed and
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Speaker 1: what you're gonna eat and me and you male prepping.
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Speaker 1: You know, like people be missing like this ain't just
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Speaker 1: throwing a party. This is an opportunity to lay down
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Speaker 1: a foundation or blueprint of your marriage. And so when
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Speaker 1: the wedding is over, the marriage is really what you're
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Speaker 1: working on. So being married is the mission. And then
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Speaker 1: once you get on the mission of marriage, then you
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Speaker 1: put your marriage on the mission.
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Speaker 2: Now, well, now that we together, right, we're.
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Speaker 3: Back with the Power Couple on Inspiration thirteen ninety Relationship
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Speaker 3: Talk Thursdays and conversations we have before we get on
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Speaker 3: the air.
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Speaker 4: Y'all just be in the room to understand what I'm
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Speaker 4: talking about.
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Speaker 3: All right, So we're talking about discovering the mission of
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Speaker 3: your marriage. You submitted a statement that said a couple
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Speaker 3: with purpose can overcome any problems.
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Speaker 4: So you've seen this work in your marriage.
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Speaker 2: Definitely.
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Speaker 5: That was only the reason why I married him is
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Speaker 5: because he was on purpose and I could see on
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Speaker 5: a piece of paper of him not knowing that I
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Speaker 5: was watching of what he wanted in life and his
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Speaker 5: goals and things of that nature, and me looking at
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Speaker 5: his goals and the things that he wanted in regards
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Speaker 5: to a family and ministry were the things that I
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Speaker 5: wanted for myself. So I figured in my mind, being
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Speaker 5: with him, I'm not going to really have to change
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Speaker 5: that much. I don't have to alter my personality to
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Speaker 5: be with him or to dumby myself down. I can
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Speaker 5: be who I am and it's going to be welcome
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Speaker 5: and it's going to strengthen. So, yeah, him knowing his purpose,
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Speaker 5: and I mean and I had been in relationships before
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Speaker 5: and they were men that I could see what they
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Speaker 5: were supposed to be doing, but they could not see
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Speaker 5: what they were supposed to be doing.
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Speaker 4: So now I'm hoping.
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Speaker 5: Against hope that you're going to get the revelation to
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Speaker 5: who you are and it was just wasted years.
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Speaker 4: That's so good. So what is exactly purpose? Somebody's like
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Speaker 4: trying to.
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Speaker 1: For why why you're together, why you're born? Purposes why,
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Speaker 1: it's the why behind the what so same in a relationship.
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Speaker 1: Why people underestimate in dating? Why should we be together?
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Speaker 1: Why are we getting married?
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Speaker 3: Like?
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Speaker 2: Why do you want to be married to me? You
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Speaker 2: know why?
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Speaker 1: And if we can answer the question why and put
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Speaker 1: purpose to precede, one of the things in our marriage
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Speaker 1: coaching that we ask people to do is create a
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Speaker 1: vision for their marriage, create a why, create a mission
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Speaker 1: for your marriage. Why do you want to be together? Oh,
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Speaker 1: we love each other? That's not enough. That's you need
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Speaker 1: more than love. Equally, yoke does not just mean that
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Speaker 1: you are both saved. You know what I'm saying, hallelujah right. Unequally,
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Speaker 1: yoke means you can both be saved and still not
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Speaker 1: have the same direction, the same vision, and live on
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Speaker 1: the same mission.
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Speaker 2: And so purpose is why.
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Speaker 1: And when you put purpose first, even when you have
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Speaker 1: a problem, you go back to why you're together.
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Speaker 2: Even when you want to quit, you go back to
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Speaker 2: why you're together. Even when you want to give up,
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Speaker 2: you go back to why.
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Speaker 1: So purpose can overcome problems, because problems come. But if
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Speaker 1: purpose is deep enough, if your why is deep enough,
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Speaker 1: you create a strategy to get around that and get
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Speaker 1: through it, because that's that's temporary. But why we're together
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Speaker 1: is that's that's why we're together. That's what we're doing right.
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Speaker 3: Yeah, Okay, I'm going to come back and answer I
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Speaker 3: want you want to answer this question. How do you
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Speaker 3: discover your individual gifts and bring them together as one
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Speaker 3: powerful assignment?
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Speaker 4: I think about that also if you have a question
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Speaker 4: a relationship talk Thursday.
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Speaker 3: Thank you so much for your questions that are coming
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Speaker 3: in for the Glenns the Power Couple.
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Speaker 4: How many books have you all written? Is it twenty books?
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Speaker 4: Pastor Dramon, he's written twenty books. We've written three three together.
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Speaker 2: Yes we have Okay, and that's great.
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Speaker 4: That's great.
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Speaker 2: We got more on the way, more on the way.
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Speaker 4: It's a part of your missions.
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Speaker 2: Wow.
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Speaker 3: Okay, So you know there's a shared assignment as a couple,
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Speaker 3: as a married couple. But then I guess we also
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Speaker 3: have our individual gifts on individuals assignments. How do those
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Speaker 3: come together as one powerful assignment?
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Speaker 4: I think you.
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Speaker 5: First have to do a self evaluation of knowing what
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Speaker 5: your gifts are. That's the first thing you know, and
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Speaker 5: I think some people don't really know what their gifts are,
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Speaker 5: and they have to know what that is in order
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Speaker 5: for you to be able to bring it together. And
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Speaker 5: then once you know what your gifts are, then the
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Speaker 5: other person you know what their gifts are, and you
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Speaker 5: know where the the strengths the strengths and also where
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Speaker 5: the weaknesses are too, and then deciding who's better at
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Speaker 5: the task at hand, and allowing that person to be
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Speaker 5: the superstar in there and to be the supporting person
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Speaker 5: in it. And you have to be comfortable with that
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Speaker 5: and not be competing with each other in various spaces
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Speaker 5: and places.
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Speaker 2: And if you don't know, or you're still discovering.
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Speaker 1: Right in the Bible and in our book Kingdom Relationships,
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Speaker 1: a man is created to lead and a woman that's
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Speaker 1: created to help. And if you don't know what you
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Speaker 1: should be doing, that's the bare minimum.
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Speaker 2: Man of God.
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Speaker 1: You need to provide some leadership because a woman can't
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Speaker 1: help but help. And if you don't provide leadership in
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Speaker 1: her dominion, she's also so she's.
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Speaker 2: Going to lead if you're not leading.
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Speaker 1: And then if you tell her where you're going and
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Speaker 1: what you're trying to do, she's gonna make it better
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Speaker 1: because she's annointed to help, so identifying gifts and strengths
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Speaker 1: before you get to the complication of all the other things.
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Speaker 1: At the bare foundation of how God created you in
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Speaker 1: the context of marriage is leadership and help. I will
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Speaker 1: provide a help mate for him because he's responsible for
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Speaker 1: doing these these this, this, this so.
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Speaker 2: What hey, honey, how you doing? What? What we're doing?
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Speaker 2: What we're doing? Are we doing this?
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Speaker 5: This?
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Speaker 1: Okay, I'm gonna take this by I'm gonna do that.
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Speaker 1: You're gonna do that, I'm gonna do that. You know,
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Speaker 1: it's a barbecue, it's a dinner, it's a it's a vacation.
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Speaker 1: It's it's in the little clues that you automatically do
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Speaker 1: what you do. That's how you do it. You know,
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Speaker 1: we want to invite people over all, Right, I'm gonna
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Speaker 1: contact them and I'm gonna go grosser shopping. I'm gonna
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Speaker 1: cook the food, and I'm a season man, I'm a
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Speaker 1: barbecue and you're.
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Speaker 2: Gonna cook the side. Do you know what I'm saying.
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Speaker 2: It's like you already.
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Speaker 1: Function, and then people make it more complicated than it is,
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Speaker 1: and you don't know how to lean on each other
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Speaker 1: for each other's strength. You know, and that's what the
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Speaker 1: songs mean when they say you bring you know, I
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Speaker 1: bring home the bacon and you fried up in a pant.
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Speaker 1: You know. It's like there's too many people out here
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Speaker 1: feeling like they doing all of it and they're married.
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Speaker 1: Nobody should be married doing all of it. Somebody got
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Speaker 1: to do half of it and somebody got.
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Speaker 2: To do the other half.
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Speaker 3: Do you ever have you guys ever found like somebody
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Speaker 3: may their mission or their role in the marriage may
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Speaker 3: be difficult if one person is always in the spotlight,
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Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying, like or one person This
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Speaker 3: is an example if one person, say, for instance, a
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Speaker 3: husband is a pastor and the wife is like, well.
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Speaker 4: That's him, that's not who you know what I'm so
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Speaker 4: I am?
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Speaker 2: Is it?
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Speaker 3: What do you do when it seems like there's some
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Speaker 3: type of there's no clarity, or it seems like there's
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Speaker 3: some type of division when it comes to not really
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Speaker 3: really being sure or maybe it's not you're not aligned
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Speaker 3: in certain way.
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Speaker 5: I think, in using your example, I think sometimes that
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Speaker 5: is because because it doesn't always have to be a
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Speaker 5: man that is a pastor or whatever or the superstar.
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Speaker 5: And I won't say a superstar, the person that's kind
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Speaker 5: of like the in the spotlight. But I think when
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Speaker 5: the background or the supporting spouse, well that's them, I'm
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Speaker 5: not doing it. I think that has a lot to
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Speaker 5: do with the spotlight spouse not acknowledging what that person
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Speaker 5: or what that supporting spouse brings to the table. And
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Speaker 5: I have to say, I think early on in our marriage,
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Speaker 5: I said to my husband, you know, I'm like, listen,
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Speaker 5: my grandmother has told me horror stories of how she's
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Speaker 5: been treated as a as a pastor's wife, and I
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Speaker 5: just don't want to experience it.
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Speaker 4: That's why I never wanted to marry a pastor.
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Speaker 5: I said, But since I'm gonna do this, I need
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Speaker 5: you to understand what it might feel like, and I
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Speaker 5: need you to make sure. And me sharing that with him,
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Speaker 5: he always, always, never, never ever had to ever bring
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Speaker 5: that up ever again. My husband makes sure that we're
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Speaker 5: always taking care of My husband makes sure that our
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Speaker 5: not just me, but our children are treated in a
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Speaker 5: certain kind of way before he gets on the stage.
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Speaker 5: And so it's the background stuff. It's the stuff that
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Speaker 5: you do at home, it's the stuff that you do
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Speaker 5: on the way in the car. So being a support
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Speaker 5: doesn't necessarily put you in the background. It just means
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Speaker 5: that all pieces have to work in order for the
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Speaker 5: quote unquote star to be able to shine, because really
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Speaker 5: you're not shining if at home it's hell, you just
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Speaker 5: not you're not shining. So that's supporting spouse is the
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Speaker 5: essence of like the space of the spotlight. Like they're
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Speaker 5: like the silver lining of the other spouse. And that's
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Speaker 5: how you know that they have a good marriage when
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Speaker 5: that person is out there and they're shining and you
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Speaker 5: can get the energy and you can get the knowledge
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Speaker 5: and all this other kind of stuff, but you don't
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Speaker 5: feel nothing, feel nothing weird behind it because there's some
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Speaker 5: things you receive from people you like that was good,
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Speaker 5: but I don't know because it's the other stuff that's
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Speaker 5: not being seen, the internal stuff. So that supporting spouses
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Speaker 5: the internal organs of the shining spouse in order for
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Speaker 5: them to shine the way that they do that internally
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Speaker 5: has to those those things got to be tuned correctly,
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Speaker 5: and that is that tuning is done in private, that
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Speaker 5: tuning is done behind the scenes, that tuning is done
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Speaker 5: before they get on the stage.
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Speaker 4: I'm gonna sound like, you know, what you're talking about it.
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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's great.
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Speaker 1: And security and then and then the other the other
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Speaker 1: person that's not out front in the moment, has to provide,
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Speaker 1: have to be secure. Ye know who they are, who
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Speaker 1: they function, and what is You can't be insecure, You
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Speaker 1: can't be insecure.
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Speaker 3: All right, We're gonna come back and talk about legacy,
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Speaker 3: marriages on mission create legacy. And you know, do you
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Speaker 3: believe your marriage was created to accomplish beyond raising children?
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Speaker 4: Yes, talk about that.
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Speaker 3: It's relationship talk Thursday with the Power Couple, Pastors Demone
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Speaker 3: and Erica Glynn, and we're talking about marriage as a
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Speaker 3: mission and also want to talk about our legacy.
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Speaker 4: You know, we have I have children, I have two children.
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Speaker 4: You all have how many children together?
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Speaker 2: Three?
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Speaker 4: Three children? Three children?
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Speaker 3: This question came through what do you believe your marriage
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Speaker 3: was created to accomplish beyond raising children?
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Speaker 2: Yeah?
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Speaker 1: I think people think that multiply is pro create and
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Speaker 1: that's being that's all we're going to get together to
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Speaker 1: have children. And everybody don't even want children, and everybody
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Speaker 1: don't even have children.
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Speaker 2: But your marriage is made for so much more. You know,
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Speaker 2: your marriage is made.
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Speaker 1: Yes, you want to put good humans out into the
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Speaker 1: world that contribute to society. But your marriage is made
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Speaker 1: for so much more. Your marriage is made for each other,
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Speaker 1: for to accomplish something beyond just pro creation, but for multiplication,
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Speaker 1: for a dominion, for subduing, for you know, working together,
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Speaker 1: for collaboration, for partnership, for fellowship, for you know, so
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Speaker 1: much more. You get to decide the mission of your marriage.
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Speaker 1: And if people refocus to decide, yo, what do we
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Speaker 1: want to do together? You know, what do we want
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Speaker 1: to do. We want to travel the world together. We
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Speaker 1: want to make some money together, we want to leave
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Speaker 1: some money, we want to be philanthropists, we want to
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Speaker 1: you know, whatever that is that you want to.
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Speaker 2: Do, you can do it.
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Speaker 1: Because if two people touching degree is touching anything, it
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Speaker 1: shall be established. People use that for prayer, but they
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Speaker 1: don't use that for their for their marriage.
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Speaker 4: That's good.
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Speaker 2: Yeah, and I think it's a marriag.
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Speaker 5: I think also, you know, when you're talking about multiplying
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Speaker 5: and legacy, you know, because you you live long enough,
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Speaker 5: your marriage will go through different seasons, you know what
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Speaker 5: I'm saying. So like if you are if you do
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Speaker 5: have children, and then what that looks like with elementary
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Speaker 5: children and in middle school and high school and then
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Speaker 5: becoming empty nesters. And then now if you haven't made
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Speaker 5: your marriage and your mission was your children, then now
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Speaker 5: you're like, who are you?
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Speaker 4: And what are you still doing here?
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Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying, And now you have to
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Speaker 5: discover marriage that if you would have just made your
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Speaker 5: marriage your mission, when your seasons of your marriage come
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Speaker 5: in and out, you would have still been able to
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Speaker 5: be sustainable in your marriage and not look at this
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Speaker 5: person after ten, fifteen, twenty years and say.
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Speaker 4: Who are you?
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Speaker 5: You wouldn't you wouldn't have to ask that question, or
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Speaker 5: you would be asking that question because you've been asking
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Speaker 5: that question all these years. So I just think that
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Speaker 5: when people realize the mission of the of their marriage
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Speaker 5: and you know it it, great things come out of it.
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Speaker 5: But at the end of the day, our mission is
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Speaker 5: unto each other. Because this is the foundation, this is
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Speaker 5: the this is the place that our children are going
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Speaker 5: to reflect back on, this is where our grandchildren reflect
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Speaker 5: back on. Or this is the big business that we
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Speaker 5: have set up. The people that come through our business
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Speaker 5: that we have to handle, they're going to know who
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Speaker 5: we are and how what kind of bosses we are
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Speaker 5: to them. You know, all of the different projects and
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Speaker 5: books and legacy things that you leave on this earth
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Speaker 5: when you're gone. What did you do as a couple
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Speaker 5: that you were not able to do by yourself? And
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Speaker 5: just to give people the hope and to be the
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Speaker 5: example that this too, if we're in a difficult place,
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Speaker 5: shall pass because we got more to do. But when
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Speaker 5: that mission is it, if it's not in the forefront,
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Speaker 5: it makes it very cloudy and muddy to get through
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Speaker 5: some difficult times. But when you know what your mission is,
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Speaker 5: you're clear your focus and that's where you're heading to
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Speaker 5: where always?
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Speaker 3: So, what if you did like your children like you
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Speaker 3: gave a lot of your attention to that, and now
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Speaker 3: that your children are grown and gone, yep, and you're
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Speaker 3: trying to figure this thing out?
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Speaker 4: What is the step that somebody can take?
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Speaker 1: Yeah, you go back to the anniversary episode a couple
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Speaker 1: weeks ago and you refocus.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly, and say where are we?
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Speaker 2: Okay, that's great, we get a good job. Good job?
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Speaker 2: What you want?
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Speaker 1: Because I know you want something right now? What you
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Speaker 1: want in this phase of life? How do you know?
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Speaker 2: What does that look like? You reimagine what.
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Speaker 5: Does that bedroom is? Going to become an exercise room
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Speaker 5: that our kids like you do like you, and and
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Speaker 5: and I think sometimes you know children, they feel a
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Speaker 5: certain kind of way, like why you turn my bedroom
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Speaker 5: into an excellent because this is what your father wanted
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Speaker 5: or this is what your mother wanted. And we're married,
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Speaker 5: this is our house exactly, and you're gonna feel a
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Speaker 5: certain kind of way. And you're gonna be okay because
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Speaker 5: you felt that way when we told you get out
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Speaker 5: our bed.
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Speaker 4: It's okay.
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Speaker 5: You're gonna be all right, because this is our marriage
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Speaker 5: and this is the mission. This is our mission is
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Speaker 5: to be together. Our mission is to figure out what
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Speaker 5: we're supposed to do. Now that you're gonna go live
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Speaker 5: your life. We've got to live our lives without you
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Speaker 5: in a sense, and you were the main thing and
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Speaker 5: now we've got to reevalue what that looks like so
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Speaker 5: we can stay married, all right.
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Speaker 3: Well, if you missed the anniversary episode, listen back and
16:04
Speaker 3: listen to the podcast. It's Rason thirteen ninety dot com
16:08
Speaker 3: or there on the free iHeartRadio app. And of course
16:11
Speaker 3: you can always reach out to the Glenns. The best
16:13
Speaker 3: way to do that is what.
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Speaker 1: YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, or at jermone Glenn dot com. Yes,
16:21
Speaker 1: we're connected there and that's where you can find everything
16:25
Speaker 1: that's happening and everything that's going on. One more of this,
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Speaker 1: follow us to the future.