Latest / The Treehouse Show Podcast / Episode 17 - Is Dan Hallucinating Bugs? Maybe, But He Definitely Licked His Cat.
Transcript
- 0:00M welcome in again to the Treehouse along with Trey Trenholme and Alfie coy On.
- 0:44Daniel Malley. Now, I'm trying to suppress my excitement just a little
- 0:49bit, but it's kind of hard because I've discovered something that is borderline miraculous.
- 0:56It's not exactly going to change, you know. I'm not going to
- 0:58get a Nobel Prize for it or anything like that. It is certainly not
- 1:00going to make me a millionaire. God I wish it would, But I
- 1:04have discovered something that is extremely, extremely beneficial. If you ever have really
- 1:11bad bug bites. Oh, I thought you were gonna say you finally installed
- 1:14a biday. Now, then I would not have tried to suppress my excitement.
- 1:19I just wouldn't have been like, guess what, man, Biddays are
- 1:23wonderful. I wish they were everywhere so nice walking away after a poop and
- 1:29feeling fresh and clean. See. I think it's better that biddays are not
- 1:33made available to the public, at least not in the States, because because
- 1:36then people would misuse them and then there would be water in bathroom floors everywhere.
- 1:41That is true. You do have to be responsible as a Biday operator
- 1:45because you can just turn it on and then just spray water everywhere on the
- 1:48floor, and as we all know, some prick will do that. But
- 1:53in other countries where bidays are common, like let's just stay with the stereotype,
- 1:57like in Japan where they have all the really cool bi days, do
- 2:01they have the days? And do they have bid days in public bathrooms or
- 2:05do they also not trust their public? I don't know. I think they
- 2:07probably would. It seems like it's uniquely American thing. It seems like,
- 2:14you know, like eating tide pods, because you know, if there were
- 2:15public there would be some kid who drowns himself somehow and with a biday.
- 2:22H stupid kids? Or do you do you have a biday in solive to
- 2:27help your your bug bites? No? No, the bug bites in the
- 2:30bidday? Uh, completely not related whatsoever. With the lead up you gave
- 2:37it, I thought you were talking about masturbation, I was like, wow,
- 2:38you just discovered that. Are you talking about masturbating with a bidday?
- 2:46You just you gave it such a lead up of you know, like life
- 2:51changing. But it won't make me millions, but it's great, And I'm
- 2:53like, man, how I felt discovered masturbation. Godsha, not for a
- 2:59second there you were saying that you that you were going to challenge me and
- 3:01say, no, you've already trademarked it is that a pun? Dan,
- 3:07Did you just try and pun Trey's name to trade mark? Actually, no,
- 3:13that's that's all you. That's because you have not guard up. No,
- 3:16you have your guard up against the puns or the word play. Sorry,
- 3:23I know what to expect from you. Pardon me if if if I
- 3:28am a little antsy, no pun with the bug bites, a little antsy
- 3:32that you might throw out puns, I still might I still I look,
- 3:38look, Alfie, I'll be honest with you. I live to disappoint you.
- 3:43I know. No the uh, I'm sure. I'm sure you guys
- 3:46have experienced awful bug bites like I'm talking about something, you know, I
- 3:51don't mean necessarily painful, but just crazy itchy, whether it's an ant bite
- 3:54like you mentioned, Alfie with aunts um serviously, there are. Up until
- 4:01recently, I thought I thought chigger bites were among the absolute worst because they
- 4:06itched so bad, and also because a lot of times when you get those
- 4:11chigger bites, they usually end up in really sensitive areas and it looks really
- 4:15bad if you're walking around someplace, like if you're Alfhae at the mall and
- 4:17you're constantly scratching your groin and telling people it's chiggers. How do bugs be
- 4:24getting you in your crotch? Well, if you're rolling around in the grass,
- 4:30I mean, that's what happens y'all. Y'all are rolling around bare ass
- 4:33naked in the grass. Not in a really long time. But how do
- 4:39they get all up in your crotch? Though? Is what I'm saying.
- 4:42If you sit in the grass, you see. This is why I don't
- 4:46do outside. This is nope, nope, well wait wait wait wait,
- 4:51because I before, before you go off on some sort of outside tangent tray,
- 4:58are you, are you familiar with Alfie's aversion to outdoors. Not really,
- 5:04It's mostly based in reality, like uh, like he's he's, he's
- 5:09I've you know, Terry and I, before we moved, we would invite
- 5:12Alphie, you know, to go camping and be like, no, I'm
- 5:15not doing that because you know, wild animals and things. Yeah exist.
- 5:17Again, not to take it back to the days, but indoor plumbing exists.
- 5:21Why would I go somewhere where there's not a place to poop, you
- 5:28can let alone a place to poop with air conditioning. And and Trey's kind
- 5:33of cut from that same cloth. Alfie like, I've we've invited Tray out
- 5:36to go camping before, and he's like, is there air conditioning? No?
- 5:39Well then I'm not going. All right, I'm fine, and I
- 5:42don't blame you for it, um, But we've still, you know,
- 5:46going outside in Texas, eventually you're going to run a foul of some type
- 5:49of you know, insect bike typically mosquitoes, right, and those those bikes
- 5:56really, you know, typically aren't that bad. But where we live now,
- 6:03on an island in the Caribbean, twenty two hundred miles away from Texas,
- 6:06there's there there are additional insects to be wary of. And specifically they're
- 6:14called noseums. What they look like little like super tiny mosquitoes, and they
- 6:20have absolutely, by far, if there is a scale of itchiness from from
- 6:28a bug bite, they got to be at the top. I can't think
- 6:30of anything that's ever bitten me that was was itchier than a noseum bite.
- 6:36A noseum, yes, as in you can't see it yes, did you
- 6:44just make this crap up right now? No, it's real. Really,
- 6:48this sounds like this sounds like a stupid plot device in in Avatar. What
- 6:54was it? Unobtainium. It sounds like one of those things. Oh it's
- 6:59a spooky mist gold bug you cannot see. But you're right, I remember
- 7:05maybe that. I think that's part of the reason I never finished Avatar once
- 7:09they said we we have to find more unobtainium. Like, really, that's
- 7:14the name you came up with for for the substance that centers around the whole
- 7:17plot. Oh god, this is not what y'all got. That's what y'all
- 7:24got hung up with an Avatar. I never heard of it. I never
- 7:27watched the movie. Like I heard the plot and I read that that they're
- 7:30mining for unobtainium, and I was like, you know what, I'll just
- 7:33go watch Terminator two again and remember remember James Cameron the way I want to
- 7:40when his best dialogue written for film was I'll be back. Yeah, exactly.
- 7:44That hits the spot. It it's perfect in its simplicity. But you
- 7:49know, unobtainium in the writing. That's what happens when you focus all your
- 7:54money and all your efforts on the visuals. You just let the writing go
- 7:57to the wayside. Anyway, Sorry, this fake bug that you're talking about,
- 8:01it's not a fake bug. No cems are real. Look, Tray,
- 8:05you were here not that long ago, did I forget? Did you
- 8:07get some no sem bites? No, you never even met you even never
- 8:11mentioned anything like that, because he's sand fleas. But the only thing like
- 8:16sand fleas, it's the same thing. It's the same bug, sand fleas.
- 8:18No sms uh, like you know, nat to the beach nats or
- 8:24whatever they're called. But bugs are they? Are they? Please? Are
- 8:28they nats? Are they mosquitos? NAT's an unusual side. Well they are.
- 8:33They're just really really tiny, so it makes it hard to see them.
- 8:37Can you see them or not? How do you know that you're getting
- 8:39bit? Occasionally you might feel it, but you really don't know for a
- 8:46day or two that you got bit by a no sum based on the wealth
- 8:50that comes up and the extreme level of itchiness. You know, cannot oversell
- 8:54this enough how itchy these bites are? Dan, I believe you're now no
- 8:58cms or deafly a real thing. Will you point out on this doll where
- 9:03the no SEMs hurt you. Wow, yes, I will ankles, feet
- 9:11toes and behind my knees. This sounds like you have a rash, Dan,
- 9:16and you see a dermatologist. It's not a rash. Trust me.
- 9:20This is okay. If it's a bug that you don't see and you cannot
- 9:24like do you have eggs ema or something like that, and you just blame
- 9:26it on this mystical, mythical bug, you know it's real. Google it,
- 9:31it's a real bug, and you like look up no SEMs and then
- 9:35you can, you know, see like the bites that they leave, and
- 9:37it takes like two weeks for the bites to finally go away. It's terrible
- 9:43when when when Tara's dad was here visiting, Uh, he didn't spray any
- 9:48bugs bray and he got them all up and down his back and he was
- 9:50talking. He couldn't sleep very well for two nights because they itched so bad.
- 9:54But the reason why I'm so excited, what's up? Is it not
- 9:58like ringworm or something like that, Because it sounds like a rash that you're
- 10:01spreading, Dan, It's not a rash, it's bug bites, super super
- 10:07itchy bug bites. So I was trying to look up different treatments. Right,
- 10:09It's like, okay, what can I do to make this better?
- 10:11There's got to be something to do to make this itchiness go away. So
- 10:16the first thing I saw was like, take benadrol. Okay, fine,
- 10:18I can take benadrol. That's fine, I'll do that. But then I
- 10:20also saw something that's supposed to help with the itchiness. And this is true
- 10:24for apparently all itchy you know, bug bites, so mosquitoes, no cms.
- 10:28I guess it would work for chiggers as well. Is you do cold
- 10:33packs or cold compress one to help reducing sort of swelling and some and I
- 10:37guess the cold was supposed to help with you know, the itchies. So
- 10:45what I did was they also mentioned like a cortizone thing like for bug bites,
- 10:48like a steroid like little ointment or something. And I used to have
- 10:54that, but it didn't really work. But what I did have that I
- 10:56decided to try it was a tube woman urine. No, that's a myth
- 11:01that that that doesn't actually work. Have you tried it? No? Well,
- 11:05this mythical uh tincture of human hurine might work really well on your mythical
- 11:11bug dan, I tell you. What if you ever get a bite like
- 11:15that, find someone to piss on you, but don't call me. No,
- 11:18no, I'm saying you're the one. You're the one that's always getting
- 11:20afflicted by these awful, awful bugs that are definitely real. If you come
- 11:26to the Caribbean, you will experience it. Deal. I'll be on you
- 11:28if I go to the Caribbean. No you won't. That's gonna be a
- 11:33really funny vacation video for somebody is watching you chase me up and down the
- 11:37beach. Come back, let me pee on you. Hurry, I'm dad.
- 11:39I've been drinking. They don't want it to go to waste. I
- 11:45can only hold this for so long. I don't as Yeah, oh god,
- 11:50that's awful. No, So what I what? I what I decided
- 11:54to use that I had a lot of because because I have back problems is
- 11:58bio freeze. So it's like the roll on bio free stuff to stuff.
- 12:03You shake it up and it's got the little on the tip and you just
- 12:05you know. So I decided I'm gonna take the cold thing that that that
- 12:07the that Google told me to try, and I'm gonna try bio freeze.
- 12:11Yeah, I thinks. Isn't it just like light of cane and bio freeze.
- 12:16I'm not sure if there's actual light of cane in it, but it
- 12:18definitely makes wherever you put it cold as hell. So I used my old,
- 12:24you know, grown man logic. It's like, okay, Google says
- 12:26you use cold things. Well, here, I have a substance that is
- 12:31really really cold when I put it on. So I'm gonna try this so
- 12:33I could apply it directly to the bug bites, right, and it worked.
- 12:37Bo It's amazing. Is it that same role of bio freeze, that
- 12:41same tube of bio freeze that you stole from my desk at the radio station.
- 12:46Perhaps, Yeah, that's what I thought us. Roll up, it's
- 12:50not. It's not a felony or anything. I kept it within the states.
- 12:54No. In fact, me saying me saying that you stole it is
- 12:56probably a mislay bling. It's probably a little misleading because you walked up and
- 13:03used it, and I don't want that no more exactly, And that would
- 13:07be my defense in court. He said he didn't want it, so to
- 13:11me meant he gifted it to him and walk up and stick my finger in
- 13:13your mashed potatoes. That happened to me in middle school dessert. No,
- 13:20there was actually a kid who would go around and he would because I guess
- 13:24he was always hungry, so he'd go around lick his finger sticking in people's
- 13:28food and say you're going to eat that? And they, of course would
- 13:31say no, and then he got a you know, free lunches out of
- 13:33it, until one day he came by my table, licked his finger stuck
- 13:37at my mashed potatoes and said, are you going to eat that? And
- 13:39I said, yeah, get your finger out of it. And then he
- 13:41never bothered me again. He bothered a bunch of other people, but he
- 13:46never went back to me. Yeah, I was gonna eat that? Was
- 13:50he the poor kid? I don't know. I don't think he was doing
- 13:54it out of hunger. I think he was doing it because he was an
- 13:56a hole. Oh well then if you're hungry, maybe he's also. Maybe
- 14:01he was an ahole because he was hungry. I don't know. Yeah,
- 14:03he could have just been poor Dan. You couldn't have been given him your
- 14:05taters, Well he could have just he could have just said, hey,
- 14:09I'm poor and hungry, he can I have that? Would that would have
- 14:11you know, had a better chance, because then he has to admit that
- 14:13to himself. He has to admit that to himself in a bunch of you
- 14:16know, middle schoolers. So it's just easier to bully people into the mashed
- 14:20potatoes. Yeah, it's a defense mechanism, Dan, And you couldn't just
- 14:24give him give him some taters. No, I don't like bullies. So
- 14:30anyway, bio freeze on bug bites change your life. Thank you, You're
- 14:37welcome. I'm telling you this is this is a home remedy, and I
- 14:39researched it after the after the fact. It's been like, I'm on day
- 14:43three now of using bio freeze on these bites and they're almost gone, whereas
- 14:48before they would last for like two weeks and they would itch like crazy for
- 14:52days, days in a row. Yeah. The bio freeze is menthol like
- 14:56mentholatum or whatever the hell. Yeah, so it's good and cold act works
- 15:01on the bug bites. It'll reduce swelling and things like that. I get
- 15:03it probably probably overloads your nerves there with a little bit of kind of cooling
- 15:07sensation, so it ignores the pain. Just so remember that next time you
- 15:11get like you roll around and you know, in a bed of chiggers or
- 15:16an ant hill like with fire ants or something. Get get you some bio
- 15:20freeze. Use that and you can thank me later. I'm good. See
- 15:24And you know one of our listeners are gonna get crabs and try this.
- 15:28That's on them. This is not a medical show. There are no doctors
- 15:33anywhere in this treehouse, not anymore because most of them are in prison.
- 15:41You're in the treehouse. Sweet Dan, O'Malley and Alfie Koy joined again with
- 16:03our friend and sponsor Rodney Anderson. Good afternoon, Rodney, Good afternoon,
- 16:07Dan. Your phone number, I know you know it, but not everybody
- 16:11else does. It's new to some of us. Nine seven two fifty two
- 16:15hundred. That is the number, nine seven fifty two hundred. Let's talk
- 16:18about something uncomfortable for a minute. Let's talk about divorce. Not yours,
- 16:22not mine, none of that, but everybody else's You handled divorce situations quite
- 16:26often? Are you seeing that a lot right now? People having to do
- 16:30cash out refinances or buying a house due to divorce. Yeah. One thing
- 16:33that never seems to go away is divorces. Some of the busiest people out
- 16:37there are courts and divorce attorneys. In fact, we have a ton of
- 16:41divorce attorneys that refers their clients to do like you said, either cash out
- 16:47or buy a home. We had a client that was referred to us by
- 16:49a great divorce attorney just yesterday. They owned a home or six hundred thousand
- 16:55dollars. They didn't have a mortgage on, but they were getting divorced and
- 16:59they have this split up the equity in the property. So life was keeping
- 17:03the house and so she is doing a cash out refinance for three hundred thousand
- 17:07dollars to pay off her ex husband. So we offer cash out refinances to
- 17:12pay off part of the equity in the home. We also offer refinances because
- 17:18many times the judges will require that the spouse keeping the home has to refinance
- 17:22out of the current loan. And so we'll do those situations and then on
- 17:27the buy side. Let's face it, one house turns into two homes,
- 17:32and we're doing a loan for a couple right now, they're getting divorced,
- 17:34they're selling their house, it's getting ready to close, and then we're doing
- 17:38both loans for them. When it comes to buying, here's what people need
- 17:41to understand, divorce is complicated. You've got to hold your hand. We
- 17:47have to hold your hand walking through this whole thing because you need to know
- 17:49all the rules. Do I have to be officially divorced before I can buy
- 17:52a house? What is the process? There lots of questions and we just
- 17:56tell people pick up the phone. Whether it's you love one of family member
- 18:00or a friendless going through a divorce and needs our service. In the situations,
- 18:06yeah, it can definitely be overwhelming. Here. You just heard a
- 18:07number of examples that Rodney has dealt with throughout his career, and it's important
- 18:11to know that he can help you through that process. Like he said,
- 18:14he hold your hand, walk you through all of it. It's already a
- 18:17daunting situation you're involved in, so you're gonna need some expert help, and
- 18:21that is Rodney Anderson. It's who we use here in the Treehouse for all
- 18:23things lending, and that's who we recommend to you. So give him a
- 18:26call nine seven two nine eight five fifty two hundred nine seven two nine eight
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- 18:33Thanks Rodney, thanks you and if M Lending is an equal housing lender A
- 18:37three thousand Village Parkway Suite four hundred, Higland Village, Texas and MLS two
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- 19:10You're in the treehouse with Dan O'Malley and Alfie Corner. I wish it wasn't,
- 19:23but today's just been a weird day in our house, is it?
- 19:29Because you've been hallucinating bugs? Now, now those are very real, and
- 19:34those bites that didn't get them at the house, that was that was at
- 19:37a bar uh outside the house. That's why you don't goss that I had
- 19:45to deal with no uh no, no cums or whatever you're calling them.
- 19:52Well, that's because you know, that's because well that's all. That's because
- 19:55you've never come here. Uh yeah, but I mean you're gonna have the
- 20:00hallucinations wherever you are, Dan, what kind of bar are you going to?
- 20:07Where you getting bitten like that? Well, I don't want to say
- 20:11it because it's going to reinforce Alfie's argument. But outside ones, I ain't
- 20:18got no magical, mystical hallucination bugs in my house, not unless I've been,
- 20:23you know, eating some funny things. But not the point. The
- 20:27point is is going outside, that's where you get bit. You ain't gotta
- 20:30worry about no bug bites going you know, going to the bathroom watching a
- 20:34movie on couch. Hmm that Russ Feller, he had it right. He
- 20:38had it right, although up to end, including his untimely demise no we
- 20:52can go ahead, Tray know we circled back around to therapy. God,
- 20:57no kidding. I googled these these bugs. Are you talking about Sarah tapo
- 21:06Gana day? Uh? Sure, it says uh Sarah tapo ghana day as
- 21:11a family of flies commonly known as no sums, which is see, I
- 21:17didn't make this up. It's a really dumb name. I'm sorry, it's
- 21:19it's a stupid, stupid name. I'm not arguing that biting midges generally one
- 21:26to three millimeters in length, it says here, I think trade dated a
- 21:30chick with that name on midge or bing Serado, Serato, Pagana day.
- 21:40Nope, that's her. It says they're everywhere. It says that they exist
- 21:45on all like all land except for arid deserts. I never experienced them.
- 21:56I never experienced them in Texas, and I've got, you know, plenty
- 21:59of mosquito bites and other bites from bugs in Texas. But here here on
- 22:03this island, the noseums thing are a real, real bitch. Yeah,
- 22:07I've I've never heard of these before, but their bites are painful and can
- 22:12cause intensely itchy lesions. See, their mouthparts are well developed for cutting the
- 22:18skin of their hosts. Let's see. Like other blood sucking flies, no
- 22:25sums can be vectors of disease causing pathogens. Among the diseases transmitted are parasitic
- 22:30nematodes. You got any nematodes? Dan, I hope not. You got
- 22:33mansonella? Is that Italian mansonella? Oh it's not a lunch item? No,
- 22:45you got that? Okay, you got blue time? I don't think
- 22:47so. No, you know you don't got bluetongue disease? No I'm good,
- 22:52pretty red. What about Uh, you got African horse sickness, which
- 22:57I don't know why they didn't call it zebra sickness. Whatever, No,
- 23:02kiddie, you got that. I don't think so I have no stripes.
- 23:07Okay, you got epizootic hemorrhagic disease, magic fever, you got arbo virus,
- 23:18you turn into a tree. Oh, I thought that was the virus
- 23:22that has all the meats, not as the right kind of stupid. I
- 23:33loved in that. I loved in that instance, Alphie, you actually laughed,
- 23:37truly laughed, and Trey looked ashamed. Oh you have the meat.
- 23:51I'm done for today show, so I'm out of my own eyes. Anyway,
- 24:07I was actually going someplace eventually with that, which was it's been a
- 24:11weird day around the house. Um. So, Alphie, you no longer
- 24:17have a cat. You kind of you you were kind of taking care of
- 24:18one for a little while. And Trey, you have a cat. You
- 24:22have Julius. Um, but Alpha, you still may have an answer to
- 24:26this question. Where is the weirdest place you have found? Cat vomit?
- 24:30Uh? Cat vomit? M hmmm. Uh. The cat did puke once,
- 24:36but it was just like kind of close to where I feed it.
- 24:38That's about it. Though I ain't never seen nor heard of no cat vomits
- 24:45because I don't own any cats. Although I will say I went to one
- 24:48of my friend's house this past weekend and she is adopting, or I guess
- 24:52fostering, a bunch of kittens, and um, two of the kittens were
- 24:59wonderful. I had had enough allergy meds to where I could pet it and
- 25:02not to worry about too much. And you know, there's not a ton
- 25:04of dander on them when they're you know, just a few weeks old.
- 25:10And it was a joy holding those kittens, just petting them and having them
- 25:12fall asleep and all that stuff. But one of them, one of them,
- 25:18the little bastard wearing a blue bow tie. This little bastard had the
- 25:22most disgusting, awful, nasty kitty farts ever. It was horrendous. Imagine
- 25:32like a cloud of thick, rotten lunch meat just attacking you, just attacking.
- 25:38And the worst part is, of all three kittens, this little guy,
- 25:41he was the most curious, you know, he was the one that
- 25:45would explore the most. So while the other two kittens they'd be, you
- 25:48know, just hanging out in their little cat blanket or whatever. The third
- 25:53guy, the one of the stupid blue bowtie, he would get up in
- 25:57your face. He would hop up on the table, climb up on you
- 26:02whatever, whatever you were doing, he would want to be involved in it.
- 26:06And while he was there, he would just let up just the nastiest
- 26:08gross fart. Oh it was awful. The d did this kit can also
- 26:14do what a lot of cats do, which is they get up into your
- 26:17face and then they immediately turn and you get the be hole. Oh yes,
- 26:21immediately he's like, obviously you'd like to see my taint right now,
- 26:26I'll go ahead and lift my tail and show you everything I got going on
- 26:30and look at that. There you go. And then while i'm here,
- 26:32I'll just I'll just go ahead and drop a little one of hold on,
- 26:37pull up the sounder. That's for you, buddy, right there. Yeah,
- 26:41that's yeah, nothing like a cat that can talk out of both ends.
- 26:48It was gross, dude, And like you, you, you wouldn't
- 26:52see him for a bit and so you'd forget about the fart. And the
- 26:56first time I smelled it too, I was like it was that somebody or
- 27:00was that the cat? Like I didn't want to immediately like call attention to
- 27:03it, because then I'm gonna get blamed for it and be like, oh,
- 27:06yeah, true if he was the cat. But the second or third
- 27:11time it happened, I had I had enough. I was like, what
- 27:15the f is that it? The best descriptor that I could find for it
- 27:19is thick rotten lunch meat. Like imagine some like hyper thick cut turkey breast
- 27:26or something like that that has just been sitting out in the sun in the
- 27:29back of a pickup truck for two to three weeks and you open up the
- 27:33container that it's in, and that's that smell. I don't know what in
- 27:37God's name that cat had been eating, but it was spawn of the devil
- 27:41type stuff. I will say this because of you know, growing up with
- 27:45cats, having cats currently their kittie pooh is some of the most sour,
- 27:52just ranked smell there is. And I will say this my experience with with
- 27:57with cat fartstead apparently you got dealt alfie is. I don't know if I've
- 28:03ever truly experienced it that because yeah, like I said, the other two
- 28:07kittens perfectly fine, adorable. It was wonderful. You could pick them up
- 28:12and they didn't have like super sharp claws just yet. Like they had the
- 28:17thumb claw that would pop out every once in a while, and that mother
- 28:19was a razor sharp. But they just, you know, adorable little kittens.
- 28:25And you can sit there and you pet them. You kind of pet
- 28:26them, not not hard, but you just kind of give them a firm
- 28:30pet, kind of simulate the mama cat, like you know how you do
- 28:33with your cat. Damn with the tongue. You got the tongue thing.
- 28:36You know, I'm talking about you right one time? Now, did you
- 28:38still do it right? It's therapeutic for your cats. Can you fill me
- 28:42in on this please. You don't have it with you. I honestly don't
- 28:55know where that that tongue thing is. I'm hoping it's still in Texas in
- 29:00a box in a garage. So I found at one point Trey a therapy
- 29:07device because Dan's one of Dan's cats is a little neurotic. Is it Warren?
- 29:10Is he the neurotic one? Yeah? Yeah, And we're looking online
- 29:15to kind of, you know, help find some sort of remedy for that.
- 29:18And one of the things that I found was an appendage. I guess
- 29:22it is the best way to put it. It's a simulated mama cat tongue
- 29:32that you, as the cat owner, put in your mouth and it hangs
- 29:37out of your mouth and you walk up to your kitten and it's a silicone
- 29:41tongue with like bumps on it, and you just rub it against the cat
- 29:45and do like a mama cat thing. It's supposed to help with it with
- 29:48anxiety in animals, in this case, specifically cats. Alphee. I really
- 29:53want to see your search history when you quote unquote just stumbled upon this.
- 29:57I found I found it by searching cat anxiety remedies. So he was doing
- 30:04it. The guys of you mean only pause. It's sold on Amazon here.
- 30:14I'll link it to you if you want. I think I can go
- 30:19the rest of my life and I have an artificial cat tongue. You say
- 30:23it couldn't Dan, Yeah, Dan could not? He the call of the
- 30:26fake cat tongue. Uh, what's too much rope? Oh my god,
- 30:32I forgot you put this on TikTok Okay, you gotta send that to me.
- 30:38Let me see what can I play this? Oh? Please tell me
- 30:41I can play this book. Click there. Yeah, okay, I don't
- 30:48want to log in, just let me let me see a stupid thing.
- 30:52Which, by the way, when I posted this on TikTok, I believe
- 30:56this is still my most viewed video. Is this like a teaser video for
- 31:04Only Dan's I hate you? I hate this show. I hate this facade
- 31:18of a treehouse that we've built. It all feels like it's crumbling around me.
- 31:33Okay, hold on, I'd love to say it was. I only
- 31:37did it for the show, and so that's what I'm gonna say. I
- 31:41only did it for the show. Okay, sure, So I bought one
- 31:45off Amazon and then tried it on the cat as it was intended. Dan
- 31:56down. What Dan's rubbing it against the cat. He's lying down on the
- 32:09concrete. Weird, Oh cats enjoyment. I didn't think. Don't come he
- 32:24liked it? Oh my god, oh chess from now so the little dog
- 32:36came over wanting zum as well see her. No, no, no,
- 32:42no, it was it was purely for the Don't act like that's out of
- 32:44the realm, like a cat. What are you trying to accuse me of
- 32:50having no standards? I'm just saying you go both ways. Don't be ridiculous
- 32:54trade This is a cat tongue, only the dog tongue got delayed. And
- 33:01ship. By the way, Trey, if you want, Alphie was kind
- 33:09enough to post it in our general tab if you want to see it.
- 33:13Okay, let's say kind enough, But in reality, I mean giant a
- 33:17hole. What's your TikTok so people can find us? Like most of my
- 33:25social media, it's at the dan O'Malley. Ah, I'm glad you're on
- 33:34TikTok. One because I ain't gonna be I don't mess with that. And
- 33:37two because that way the world gets to experience this. Oh you know you
- 33:45got Sometimes you gotta gotta make sure you reach out to the younger demographic and
- 33:53this was the way that I chose to do it. I think we just
- 34:01lost Trey. I'm not sure where you're end today. Hopefully he's not on
- 34:07Amazon ordering one for himself and his cat say in a wonderful that's did you
- 34:15find it? I found it? And it looks like those like big red
- 34:24fake lips that you would get like like almost like mister potato head. It
- 34:29didn't has a big tongue coming out of it. Yeah, with studs like
- 34:31wax Yeah yeah, ribbed for his pleasure. The cat is a boy.
- 34:46I could hear the regret and Dad's boys anyway, I had a weird morning.
- 34:53Can y'all believe that we were the show they got rid of? Yes,
- 34:59yes I can't. It was my idea. It's Dan O'Malley and Alfie
- 35:07Cord. We are joined once again by a new friend, a new sponsor
- 35:22of the Treehouse, Jacqueline from Brooks Plumbing Texas dot Com. Good afternoon,
- 35:27Jacqueline, Good afternoon. How are you guys today? Doing very well?
- 35:30Thank you. So we've spoken a little bit before and we found some common
- 35:35ground, and that is we here in the Treehouse hate scams, and you,
- 35:39as the owner of a plumbing business, also hate scams, especially those
- 35:43in the plumbing industry. So I'm wondering if you can give us an example
- 35:45of a big scam that's in your plumbing industry that we need to know about.
- 35:50I'll give you two really quick. Personally, it's a pet peeve of
- 35:53mine. If you hire a plumbing company and they come into your house and
- 35:58they say I can do the job for you for X amount of dollars.
- 36:00But if you pay ninety nine dollars today right now, and join our Friends
- 36:05and Family plan or the recurring service plan, whatever they want to call it,
- 36:10no matter how they call it. In my opinion, I think that
- 36:14it's a scam because if they'll say, oh, you pay ninety nine dollars
- 36:16today, but that'll bring your total for the repair that I just quoted you
- 36:21down by X amount one hundred or x amount of thousands of dollars. If
- 36:24they're willing to go down on their price just because you pay a one time
- 36:27fee fifty dollars ninety nine dollars, even if it's a recurring monthly fee of
- 36:30twenty dollars, that means that their bottom price is actually that lower one that
- 36:35you would be getting. You don't need, in my opinion, to join
- 36:38that plan. It's it's just fluff. It's just another way for people to
- 36:42pad their pockets. Now. Secondarily, the other biggest thing is that you
- 36:45have a warranty on most of the fixtures or things in your house, like
- 36:49your water heater. So something happens to your water heater, your plumber,
- 36:52the first thing they should say to you is, let me look at the
- 36:53warranty, let me pull that serial number, and see if these materials are
- 36:58under the manufacturer's warranty. It could be would be they could be getting those
- 37:01replacement parts sent to them by the manufacturer and then charging you for them despite
- 37:06the fact that your materials are still under warranty. Faucets come with warranties,
- 37:09water heaters come with warranties. Depends on where you get it, of course,
- 37:13but that should be the first thing that your plumber is checking on for
- 37:15you. Don't pay extra for something that should come at no cost to you.
- 37:20That's the bottom line. And there you have it. There's two great
- 37:22examples of scams that I wasn't aware of. I'm not sure if you know
- 37:25anyone else in here was, but now we know, and so now you
- 37:29know what to be on the lookout for. Or you can just do yourself
- 37:30a huge, huge favor and only call Brooks Plumbing. It's really simple.
- 37:34Just call the number two one four, three six eight thirty eight thirty eight.
- 37:37Use them as the resource that they are. They're going to work with
- 37:40you. They're going to be honest with you, something that's difficult in the
- 37:44contractor industry. So the number again to one, four, three, six
- 37:46eight thirty eight thirty eight, or of course the website Brooks Plumbing Texas dot
- 37:51com. That's Brooks Plumbing Texas dot com. Thanks Jacqueline. Thank you.
- 38:00Here in the Treehouse, even though we make our living in the stupid we
- 38:02take our homes and our recommendations very seriously. Our homes are our most valued
- 38:07possessions and we want them taken care of by the best. And when we
- 38:09find the best, we pass them on to you so that way you too
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- 40:04You're in the treehouse, switt, Dan, O'Malley, and Alfie Koy.
- 40:13Anyway, I found cat vombit on top of the refrigerator this morning, not
- 40:19because of anything I did. See. Alfie, you had mentioned that when
- 40:28you had your cat, your cat would sometimes puke next to its food bowl.
- 40:32Yeah, I found puke next to its food bowl once, So that's
- 40:36kind of what happened to me this morning. So I don't normally spend much
- 40:40time above the refrigerator. Um, but that's where we keep our binoculars.
- 40:46Has like the binocular's case. We keep that on top of the refrigerator,
- 40:50next to the sort of like the kitchen cabinet. So it's us sitting there.
- 40:54Why do you got binoculars just sitting there? They're in a case and
- 40:59okay, conected, that's not the point. Why are they sitting on top
- 41:00of your fridge? Because I don't want any of the animals, you know,
- 41:05uh, grabbing it and eating of them. Okay, but okay,
- 41:08I think you're missing my point. Why are binoculars in a location with such
- 41:14easy access? What are you doing? Are you spying on people? Yes?
- 41:19Well no, So here's the thing though, Alfie. So we have
- 41:22these really big windows right off of our kitchen. Right so there's like the
- 41:25kitchen and there's like a like a like a little dining table, and then
- 41:30next to that is the sliding glass doors that go out to the balcony in
- 41:32which case it looks out, you know, onto the ocean. And we
- 41:37got these binoculars a long time ago, really good ones. Actually got it
- 41:40from Sheelds so we could see whales out in the water outside our window.
- 41:47Okay, haven't seen any whales yet, but that's what we initially bought them
- 41:52for. Um. But like I did see I did see a naked dude
- 41:57once. That's exactly what I was calling you and tear us sit there with
- 42:00the binocular its going tear Kamar some dudes hanging doll. No, I think
- 42:07it would be more like tal because he has that cat tongue in his mouth.
- 42:21Once again. No, So there was something going out. There was
- 42:28some commotion out in the water today. So I went up to grab the
- 42:30binoculars and I grabed the binocular case and I pulled it off the top of
- 42:35the refrigerator and cat vomit falls off the side of it. We U say,
- 42:38cat vomit? Is it not just like flake pool of cat vomit?
- 42:42Or is it liquid? Still? No? This was thankfully, this was
- 42:45more solid. It was almost like the other cat, not not the one
- 42:49that I've liked. You've never given ZeVA the business. No, it would
- 42:58bring the two of you closer together. And that's why she's throwing up.
- 43:00She's chucked. So anyway, I mean, I get a little revelatory show
- 43:13by the way you once again admit to the world, because like last time
- 43:19when you when you did it on the air, we're just localized to DFW
- 43:22only DFW. Really could hear you at the time that you were broadcasting saying
- 43:28that that you licked your cat with the prosthetic tongue? Now its global?
- 43:34Does sound that really does sound weird? Out of context. You've seen the
- 43:37map that we have of all the downloads that were getting all around the world,
- 43:39right there's dudes in Denmark listening to this. There's dudes in Japan listening
- 43:44to this, and they're going, man, what the f is wrong with
- 43:45Dan? Not only do fight all their trouble, Sudan is on the map
- 43:50yep. Not only is he keeping his binoculars on the on the fridge top
- 43:54like a like some sort of rear window creeper, but he's licking. He's
- 44:00licking his cat before he does it. So I grabbed the binocular case and
- 44:05like some dried food, vomit falls off of it. And that's that's the
- 44:07reason why we keep them in the case. And uh so I get up
- 44:13on a step stool and I see there's a nice big pile of cat vomit
- 44:16next to where the case normally goes. But similarly to your situation, Alfie,
- 44:22the reason that it was up there was because that's typically where we feed
- 44:24the other cat, because that's where the other cat can go to get away
- 44:28from the other cat. I see, because that's why I has an attitude,
- 44:35because you've licked it, it's superior. No, no, Trey,
- 44:38it was the opposite. The cat had an attitude, So so then I
- 44:42licked it. Hopefully I really got to stop talking about it. He feels
- 44:47like I'm making it worse. You are anyways, licking the cat was supposed
- 44:53to help the situation. Well I haven't. I haven't stuck with it.
- 45:00So maybe with some consistency. I don't know what you feel awkward, mainly
- 45:10because I didn't expect him to like it, because I really thought he was
- 45:14going to scratch my face off. So you're feeling vulnerable, yeah, and
- 45:22I'm not comfortable being quite that vulnerable. Then you probably shouldn't record it.
- 45:32Well, see I didn't. That's that's where that's where holy matrimony plays a
- 45:37very big role, because when you're dow vows, it's like to have and
- 45:42to hold sickness and in health richer for poor when you're looking a cat.
- 45:49See if you noticed that part's not typically in the vows, but at any
- 45:53opportunity, I think perhaps for a strong relationship, it's important to record your
- 46:00spouse doing embarrassing things to hold them accountable. I was gonna say, you'd
- 46:04better, h you'd better put that in your vowel, your vowel, damn
- 46:07it, your vowel renewals. Next time you and terror renew vows, say
- 46:14Hey, no more hilarious tiktoks of me looking looking anything other than barn animals.
- 46:22I really feel like that's covered under the umbrella. It's better for worse.
- 46:30Yeah, I think I think maybe it should be, because I'm not
- 46:36sure which one it is. Well, it depends if you're herd or the
- 46:39cat. Uh. This is another reason why technology has gone too far.
- 46:52Once we have the ability to record our spouse is doing shockingly embarrassing things and
- 46:57then sharing it with the world, it just it's just really unfair. I
- 47:05got terribly unfair because I'm quite sure if they had recording devices twenty five years
- 47:10ago, i'd have to be I don't even know if they let me on
- 47:15the island. Why what did you lick twenty five years ago? Dan?
- 47:22You've already beat down Trey on his exes for the last three weeks. You
- 47:27couldn't cut the man a break for one week. No, I am where
- 47:31this is where I have a nice It's called alcohol alcoholism, Dan, I
- 47:36don't remember. Well, that's not fair. You're taking all the good excuses.
- 47:44Yeah, what's your excuse? Dan? You was stone cold sober when
- 47:46you were licking that cat. You're right, I was but it's why I
- 47:54drink since and I don't think it really helps at all. But is it
- 48:05just to get the taste out of your mouth? Don't mind me, I'm
- 48:16gonna go pull. A star is born out in the ocean. Follow all
- 48:20things Treehouse at Treehouse sawn Air, for Me Daniel Valley, and for Alfie
- 48:24at Alfie Koi. And don't forget to light Follow, Subscribe, bottle,
- 48:28download, and tell a friend the Treehouse is back. Stupid sh