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Carmen Talk - Finding Joy and Looking Ahead to 2024 with Positivity · All About The Joy

• 0:00
  Carmen Lezeth: Hey everyone, welcome to All About the Joy.
• 0:02
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm Carmen Lissette, your host, and I am so excited for 2024.
• 0:08
  Carmen Lezeth: And not in the goofy resolution.
• 0:10
  Carmen Lezeth: You know, my life is gonna change in 2024 so dramatically.
• 0:14
  Carmen Lezeth: I mean I hope it does in a good way.
• 0:17
  Carmen Lezeth: In a good way, right, you gotta put that energy out there.
• 0:20
  Carmen Lezeth: But what I do wanna talk about is some things that I learned in 2023 that I'm bringing with me in 2024.
• 0:27
  Carmen Lezeth: And I would suggest that everyone kind of think about that, right.
• 0:32
  Carmen Lezeth: Instead of doing these resolutions where, like, oh, I'm gonna lose weight or oh, I'm gonna do better about learning a new language, or whatever it is people normally do with resolutions that tend to maybe not for you, but they tend to fail, or people end up not using that gym membership that they just bought after, like February maybe a better way to think about the new year is to think about what did you learn in 2023?
• 0:57
  Carmen Lezeth: And what can you bring back into 2024 with you.
• 1:00
  Carmen Lezeth: And that's kind of something I've always done.
• 1:02
  Carmen Lezeth: Now I haven't done it with new year so much, but I have done it because my birthday is also in January.
• 1:09
  Carmen Lezeth: So every year on my birthday, I tend to do this reanalysis of what the last year was like and to see what the positivities were, what the things were that brought me joy, and if I can bring those forward with me into the new year.
• 1:25
  Carmen Lezeth: Now, I don't always succeed.
• 1:27
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm not gonna lie about that, right.
• 1:28
  Carmen Lezeth: So, for example, in 2022, I remember being excited that I was working on my book and that in 2023, I was going to finish not just the outline but finish the entire book.
• 1:42
  Carmen Lezeth: That did not happen, right, but I did do the outline.
• 1:47
  Carmen Lezeth: I did do that part of it and I also have a second book idea that I wanna do.
• 1:51
  Carmen Lezeth: So it wasn't a complete failure, but my point is making a decision and looking at what your past year was like and look at the positivities and the joy in it and seeing if you can bring that somehow into the future is always a better way to go.
• 2:09
  Carmen Lezeth: So let me tell you a couple of the things that I'm bringing with me from 2023 into 2024.
• 2:15
  Carmen Lezeth: I already talked about this in the live stream that we had on Thursday nights at 6 pm Pacific, 9 pm Eastern.
• 2:24
  Carmen Lezeth: Thank you so much for so many of you who have made all about the Joy, the podcast, such a wonderful and amazing experience and for all of you who are following us and chime in weekly and listen to the podcast, I really am appreciative.
• 2:39
  Carmen Lezeth: This is going to be a little additional podcast I'm gonna try to do when I can.
• 2:45
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm not gonna make any commitments now, but I do wanna talk about things that I usually blog about, and this is one of those things I blogged about this past Sunday on my personal website, carmensawaryscom.
• 2:58
  Carmen Lezeth: So what am I bringing in from 2023 into 2024?
• 3:03
  Carmen Lezeth: One of the things I'm bringing in is mocktails.
• 3:05
  Carmen Lezeth: If you don't know what mocktails are, basically they are quote unquote mock cocktails, right, so they're pretend drinks and listen.
• 3:14
  Carmen Lezeth: I have no reason not to be drinking or to drink.
• 3:17
  Carmen Lezeth: I enjoy drinking with my friends or not drinking or having a glass of wine at dinner, but this past year, going to lunch with some colleagues, one of my colleagues asked me if they minded if they would not drink, and I thought it was such a weird question.
• 3:35
  Carmen Lezeth: So they had a mocktail and so did I, and I was hooked.
• 3:40
  Carmen Lezeth: There is something really cool and fun about having a drink in a bar or at a restaurant before dinner or after dinner and feeling like you're part of the group and not have to worry about being tipsy.
• 3:55
  Carmen Lezeth: That's how I'm going to say it, and I realize now too, I just really enjoy kind of a fancy drink.
• 4:02
  Carmen Lezeth: So if you remember back in the day or maybe some of you have kids you used to have like Shirley temples or something.
• 4:09
  Carmen Lezeth: So this is kind of that same idea, right, but they're not Shirley temples.
• 4:13
  Carmen Lezeth: These are really cool, awesome drinks and they are non-alcoholic, and so that's one of the things in 2023 that I am absolutely bringing into 2024 and I'm really really super excited about it.
• 4:26
  Carmen Lezeth: Another thing that happened in 2023 that this was actually accidental.
• 4:32
  Carmen Lezeth: I was in a production office and I was going way too fast, I wasn't paying attention and my hand the back of my hand hit a corner desk in somebody's office and the pain was remarkable.
• 4:50
  Carmen Lezeth: We thought I had broken some bones, but I did it.
• 4:54
  Carmen Lezeth: But the bruising was so bad and it's my left hand, which is my weaker hand, but it took a long time to heal.
• 5:01
  Carmen Lezeth: But one of the things I had to do to help the healing process was take off my fitbit.
• 5:06
  Carmen Lezeth: So I was wore this monitoring fitbit watch right To monitor my steps, to monitor my heart rate, to monitor all of these different things, and so I started trying to wear it on my right hand, which just annoyed me.
• 5:20
  Carmen Lezeth: So I took it off altogether and one of the weirdest things that happened that I thought was so cool was I started working out without it.
• 5:27
  Carmen Lezeth: I started going on my walks, I started going on my little jogs, I started doing my weight training, I started being on my spin bike and I didn't have a monitoring device telling me how I was doing and it was boom like mind-blowingly awesome.
• 5:44
  Carmen Lezeth: And I really Realize to how much I was watching and paying attention too much to how many steps I took during the day, to how fast my heart was going or not going, and I was taking away from the share enjoyment of just having a workout and just enjoying it.
• 6:04
  Carmen Lezeth: So I am no longer wearing a monitoring device on my body Now.
• 6:09
  Carmen Lezeth: My spin bike and, you know, my phone still calculate a lot of these things anyways, and I didn't realize that till I disconnected my watch.
• 6:20
  Carmen Lezeth: But here's the thing I thought it was fascinating because we don't realize the habits we get into when we do things.
• 6:27
  Carmen Lezeth: Now, I'm not against people using Fitbits or Apple Watches or whatever it is, and look at if it helps you.
• 6:33
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm just saying this is something I'm bringing in from 2023 into 2024 because it was brilliant and I feel you know, even this morning I went for a workout.
• 6:42
  Carmen Lezeth: It was awesome, you know, I did like a 30 minute little jog.
• 6:46
  Carmen Lezeth: It was great, and then I walked for another 30 minutes.
• 6:48
  Carmen Lezeth: I came home, I did some weights and I don't know how many calories are burned and I don't know you know how my heart rate was.
• 6:56
  Carmen Lezeth: But I'll tell you this much it was a great workout.
• 6:57
  Carmen Lezeth: It was a fun, great workout.
• 6:59
  Carmen Lezeth: So I'm definitely bringing that into 2024.
• 7:03
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, what about you?
• 7:04
  Carmen Lezeth: Do you have any thoughts?
• 7:06
  Carmen Lezeth: As I'm saying these, I bet you do.
• 7:08
  Carmen Lezeth: This is a good time to start thinking about that, right?
• 7:10
  Carmen Lezeth: What did you do in 2023?
• 7:12
  Carmen Lezeth: That you can bring into 2024.
• 7:14
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, let me give you one more.
• 7:17
  Carmen Lezeth: I really enjoy doing the show on Thursday nights all about the joy and the podcast and the live stream has really grown and I you know it's not even a, it's not even about that.
• 7:29
  Carmen Lezeth: I've grown because I've learned and met so many new people.
• 7:34
  Carmen Lezeth: I feel really excited about that.
• 7:36
  Carmen Lezeth: So I don't know if there's something that you've done in the last year that has brought you so much joy.
• 7:43
  Carmen Lezeth: But also you taught, taught you something.
• 7:45
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm really excited about it.
• 7:47
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm going to keep the podcast and the live stream going and I hope it only grows.
• 7:52
  Carmen Lezeth: And I think that's part of why I want to do these kinds of Carmen talks, because I also want to talk a little bit without, you know, the whole crew and everybody else involved.
• 8:00
  Carmen Lezeth: I do want to do a little bit of just Carmen talk.
• 8:04
  Carmen Lezeth: That's what I'm calling it.
• 8:06
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm calling it now, so you know, kind of making a mock out of Ted talks in a way.
• 8:10
  Carmen Lezeth: The only other thing I want to say is that and this is not in a negative way, but in a really positive way, and I think this is really important I want to have a wish for 2024 that has less to do with me and more to do with other people.
• 8:26
  Carmen Lezeth: Right, I always try to figure out what I can do to be of service.
• 8:31
  Carmen Lezeth: I talk about that a lot when I work with people.
• 8:34
  Carmen Lezeth: How are we of service to other people?
• 8:37
  Carmen Lezeth: But we should also practice that in our own lives, you know.
• 8:42
  Carmen Lezeth: So one of the things that I am hoping is for people who are continuously lying to themselves about why they are in the circumstances that they are in.
• 8:54
  Carmen Lezeth: We all know these people right, they blame other people for their misery.
• 8:59
  Carmen Lezeth: They keep bringing other people down because they can't find the joy in seeing somebody else excel.
• 9:08
  Carmen Lezeth: Right, it takes a lot to be happy for other people.
• 9:13
  Carmen Lezeth: It means that you are comfortable and you are in a place of satisfaction and contentment, or it means, even if you are not, you are able to pull from yourself and care more about other people.
• 9:28
  Carmen Lezeth: There are people so much, so much so, that you want to lift them up, and I think one of the things I want to wish for the world, or wish for people that I personally know, but also just in general, as I see things like, especially in these different environments that I find myself in, whether it be work or social activities or people I hang out with like the continuous idea that you can change someone else to make you happy is it's not going to happen, like whatever is happening in your life is something only you can do to change.
• 10:07
  Carmen Lezeth: Other people are not responsible for your pain and your anger and your sadness, and even if they are let's say even if they are there's nothing you can do to change other people.
• 10:20
  Carmen Lezeth: All you can do is change yourself and who you are.
• 10:23
  Carmen Lezeth: If you don't like somebody, then don't be around them.
• 10:27
  Carmen Lezeth: If you are angry with people in your family, then why are you continuously hanging out with them and I know that's a really touchy subject.
• 10:36
  Carmen Lezeth: People get really upset with me about the whole, but it's family.
• 10:40
  Carmen Lezeth: Well then, you have to deal with the consequences of that choice.
• 10:44
  Carmen Lezeth: But it's the same thing with online.
• 10:47
  Carmen Lezeth: If you don't like someone, if you hate someone, if you think somebody is ABC or D, why are you following them?
• 10:54
  Carmen Lezeth: Why are you paying attention to them?
• 10:56
  Carmen Lezeth: Why are you even acknowledging that they exist?
• 11:00
  Carmen Lezeth: It means you still care about them, and that's okay too.
• 11:03
  Carmen Lezeth: But if you care about them, then stop complaining about them.
• 11:06
  Carmen Lezeth: Lift them up too.
• 11:09
  Carmen Lezeth: So I think my wish it's a little convoluted for people in the world, but it's like stop blaming everyone else for the circumstances you find yourself in.
• 11:19
  Carmen Lezeth: Do a lot of self-analysis, do a lot of self-work on yourself in 2024.
• 11:24
  Carmen Lezeth: If you are angry with people, then get away from the people who make you angry.
• 11:29
  Carmen Lezeth: If you are disappointed in people and the way that they treated you, then maybe those people don't deserve you.
• 11:35
  Carmen Lezeth: Maybe those people don't deserve you.
• 11:37
  Carmen Lezeth: And if you are jealous of other people.
• 11:40
  Carmen Lezeth: If you see other people succeeding or doing something that you like or doing something that you wish you can do, don't demean them.
• 11:48
  Carmen Lezeth: Lift them up or go do your own thing.
• 11:52
  Carmen Lezeth: Learn from them and go do your own thing and become spectacular In some way, shape or form.
• 12:00
  Carmen Lezeth: We are all evolving and learning from each other all the time.
• 12:05
  Carmen Lezeth: But I just think it's a much easier life to have when you can find joy, and that's why I call my show All About the Joy, and that's not necessarily a plug.
• 12:17
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't think I need to plug my show anymore and I'm really excited about that.
• 12:20
  Carmen Lezeth: But let me explain something.
• 12:21
  Carmen Lezeth: Happiness is what happens to you.
• 12:25
  Carmen Lezeth: Let me say that again.
• 12:26
  Carmen Lezeth: Happiness is external.
• 12:29
  Carmen Lezeth: It's what happens to you.
• 12:31
  Carmen Lezeth: I eat a piece of chocolate cake I'm happy.
• 12:34
  Carmen Lezeth: I get a bonus, I'm happy.
• 12:36
  Carmen Lezeth: Somebody buys me flowers I'm happy.
• 12:39
  Carmen Lezeth: Well, I don't really love flowers, but I'm just saying, right, you get the idea.
• 12:43
  Carmen Lezeth: Happiness is what happens to you.
• 12:45
  Carmen Lezeth: We don't always have control over that, you know, and it's just like sadness in a way.
• 12:51
  Carmen Lezeth: Right, sadness.
• 12:51
  Carmen Lezeth: You don't want to be sad all the time.
• 12:53
  Carmen Lezeth: You certainly cannot be happy all the time.
• 12:56
  Carmen Lezeth: If you're happy all the time, you're probably going to be committed or something right, or people are going to think you're being fake.
• 13:04
  Carmen Lezeth: So happiness is not the goal.
• 13:06
  Carmen Lezeth: Joy is the goal.
• 13:09
  Carmen Lezeth: Joy is innate.
• 13:10
  Carmen Lezeth: Joy is within us.
• 13:11
  Carmen Lezeth: No matter what your circumstance is, you can always find joy, and people look at.
• 13:20
  Carmen Lezeth: This came up.
• 13:21
  Carmen Lezeth: This came to me in 2023.
• 13:23
  Carmen Lezeth: Somebody asked me what do you think is the one most important thing that got you through your childhood?
• 13:30
  Carmen Lezeth: Now, my childhood was a lot like a lot of other people's and people get mad at me when I say that, but we all love the drama story but my childhood was as difficult as anyone else's who grew up in the poverty and the circumstances that I grew up in right.
• 13:47
  Carmen Lezeth: However, a lot of people fall through the cracks.
• 13:50
  Carmen Lezeth: I did not.
• 13:51
  Carmen Lezeth: I was so lucky and so blessed because people stepped in and helped, and that's what my book Candela is all about.
• 13:58
  Carmen Lezeth: It's about the people that stepped in and made sure I didn't fall through the cracks.
• 14:02
  Carmen Lezeth: However, as I've gotten older, I do understand that there's also something within me that was happening as well, and here's what I'll tell you.
• 14:12
  Carmen Lezeth: I've always said my entire life that I am the most positive person.
• 14:16
  Carmen Lezeth: I know that is true, but it's not about positivity, and that's what I started learning in 2023.
• 14:23
  Carmen Lezeth: And it was actually the end of 2022 when I started thinking about my second, the third book I wanna write and I am gonna work on this this year.
• 14:32
  Carmen Lezeth: That's also part of my goals for 2024.
• 14:36
  Carmen Lezeth: But it has always been my entire life all about the joy it has always been.
• 14:43
  Carmen Lezeth: How can I find joy, even in this situation that I find myself in right now, in this moment, and joy becomes kind of this word that encapsulates silver lining.
• 14:57
  Carmen Lezeth: See the positives.
• 14:59
  Carmen Lezeth: Try to find the door out of hell type of thing.
• 15:04
  Carmen Lezeth: Winston Churchill once said if you're sitting in hell or if you find yourself in hell, keep going, meaning, get out, keep walking, keep getting out.
• 15:14
  Carmen Lezeth: Find the door, find the light, find whatever it is.
• 15:17
  Carmen Lezeth: You need to walk through it, and that's what I think of joy.
• 15:21
  Carmen Lezeth: Joy is always trying to see the possibility, always trying to find the humor, the happiness, the moment, the smile, the light, the positivity, even in the worst of circumstances.
• 15:35
  Carmen Lezeth: That's what all about the joy is, and anyone, anyone, in any circumstance, can try to find that and walk yourself through.
• 15:46
  Carmen Lezeth: That doesn't mean you're walking around all the time in gleeful, smiley, laughing, happiness, but it does mean that you start to learn how to construct, how to walk through circumstances that you find yourself in.
• 16:02
  Carmen Lezeth: Even when you're mad and angry, or sad and depressed, you realize like, okay, I've had enough, now I need to figure out a way to walk through this, to walk through this step.
• 16:11
  Carmen Lezeth: Sometimes it involves finding somebody else to help you.
• 16:15
  Carmen Lezeth: Sometimes it involves having a therapist walk you through this stuff.
• 16:18
  Carmen Lezeth: Sometimes it involves just sitting and thinking about the circumstance you're in, letting yourself be sad and walking through anyways, but what you don't wanna do is keep digging the hole deeper.
• 16:32
  Carmen Lezeth: What you don't wanna do is keep sitting in sadness and depression and I am not a doctor, I'm not a psychologist, I'm not a psychiatrist, but I do believe that, in the simplest way possible, this is something all of us can get better at and I know that I am a wizard.
• 16:52
  Carmen Lezeth: This and I wish that people will have more joy in 2024.
• 16:59
  Carmen Lezeth: And that's what I'm talking about the ability to stop blaming other people for the circumstance you're in, for sitting in the circumstance you're in and figuring out how to walk through it, how to find a light and joy anyway, how to move past people who do not help you, who do not fuel you, who do not support you, who do not like you.
• 17:22
  Carmen Lezeth: A lot of people do not like me, and it's okay.
• 17:26
  Carmen Lezeth: There are eight billion people on the planet.
• 17:28
  Carmen Lezeth: What kind of ego do I think I have that everyone is supposed to like me.
• 17:32
  Carmen Lezeth: That's what makes us interesting.
• 17:34
  Carmen Lezeth: So my hope for everyone who may be listening to this, or just the two people who I know will I hope that you can find more joy in 2024 in the definition that I just explained it.
• 17:50
  Carmen Lezeth: So, thank you everyone.
• 17:53
  Carmen Lezeth: Thank you for listening to my Carmen talk and hope to see you on the live stream and remember it really is all about the joy.
• 18:00
  Carmen Lezeth: And, yes, happy New Year to everyone.
• 18:02
  Carmen Lezeth: Bye, thanks for stopping by.
• 18:06
  Carmen Lezeth: All about the joy.
• 18:07
  Carmen Lezeth: Be better and stay beautiful folks.
• 18:09
  Carmen Lezeth: Have a sweet day.