Latest / Cats & Pudding with Jennifer Dilandro / Arzo Anwar - From Afghanistan to Reality TV: Blood Sweat, and Heels

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Arzo Anwar - From Afghanistan to Reality TV: Blood Sweat, and Heels · Cats & Pudding with Jennifer Dilandro

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: This summer escape to the four star Delphi Resort on
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  Speaker 1: person at Delphi Resort dot com.
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: This is the Cats in Footing podcast.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: Melting Pot of Pudding and now here's Jen.
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  Speaker 3: Good afternoon everybody, and welcome to this episode of Cats
• 0:35
  Speaker 3: and Punning and today I have a great gas, we
• 0:37
  Speaker 3: have ourson and war and so happy to have you today.
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: We've met before. Thanks for having a meeting again. Thank
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: you so much. And you have a good story.
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  Speaker 3: You are come from Afghanistan to this country and you
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  Speaker 3: were on a reality show. Obviously, with your background you
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: probably had some issues with parents. I understand because you
• 1:02
  Speaker 3: were on a show like that. Tell us about how this.
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  Speaker 2: Will transform and how you came to get on the.
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  Speaker 4: Show on the reality show on Bravo.
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  Speaker 2: He was just and tears right and heels.
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  Speaker 4: I'm sorry, Yeah, I was on Bravo. I was on
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  Speaker 4: second season. I'm first generation from Afghanistan. So I grew
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  Speaker 4: up in California and moved here about twenty five years
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  Speaker 4: ago to pursue my dream and fashion. It was kind
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  Speaker 4: of like a natural progression. We were thinking of me
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  Speaker 4: doing something for ten years. While we were in the showroom,
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  Speaker 4: and we had something that we were already working on
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  Speaker 4: called Garment District. And while we were doing that, we
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  Speaker 4: were doing a sizzle and kind of pitching that this
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  Speaker 4: Bravo uh you know, the blood, sweat and heels kind
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  Speaker 4: of popped up. My friend Melissa Ford was on the
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  Speaker 4: show and they were recasting and looking for new girls.
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  Speaker 4: We were the opposite of the housewives, so we weren't
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  Speaker 4: like women that were kept by our cousins. We were
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  Speaker 4: single women with our own businesses, hustling in New York City. Yes,
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  Speaker 4: so in our heels, we like crying.
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  Speaker 2: I'm kidding that I met you were on the show
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  Speaker 2: for two years.
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  Speaker 4: I was on the show for one season. Yeah, one season,
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  Speaker 4: so it took about two years to kind of film
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  Speaker 4: and for it to air and all that good stuff.
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  Speaker 4: I went to reality show boot camp, I mean that's
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  Speaker 4: what it was.
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  Speaker 2: You know.
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  Speaker 4: I met Johnny you know who we know together, and
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  Speaker 4: it was it was a natural progression. I like yourself,
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  Speaker 4: strong woman, strong personality, business owner. I started my business
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  Speaker 4: when I was twenty seven years old, So from my generation,
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  Speaker 4: a lot of girls weren't doing that. They're just getting married.
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  Speaker 4: So I always just had a dream. This was a
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  Speaker 4: dream of mine when I was nine years old to
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  Speaker 4: move to New York to do what I'm doing right now.
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  Speaker 4: And I think the TV show just naturally came in
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  Speaker 4: and they liked my personality. They picked me up.
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  Speaker 3: You have a great personality. Did it catapult your catapult
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  Speaker 3: your business?
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  Speaker 2: Do you feel do you think it helped you?
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  Speaker 4: I think it helped with uh, you know, I was
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  Speaker 4: kind of a socialite in the city anyways, and working
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  Speaker 4: in fashion. I produced fashion shows. I you know, I
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  Speaker 4: was always out uh marketing, networking, so I was kind
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  Speaker 4: of in the mix already. Did it catapult my business?
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  Speaker 4: Reality shows are tricky, and especially coming from the fashion industry,
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  Speaker 4: nobody really thought it was anything, you know, great. They
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  Speaker 4: actually were afraid I was gonna get into a fight
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  Speaker 4: or you know, that it was going to be something
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  Speaker 4: that could have been detrimental. And you take your chances.
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  Speaker 4: You never know how they're going to edit things. You
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  Speaker 4: never know what situations you might be put in. You know,
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  Speaker 4: people are like, is it scripted? It's not scripted, but
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  Speaker 4: they put you in situations situations.
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  Speaker 3: It's funny that you say that, because I was just
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  Speaker 3: telling somebody about Digested I because I also do my
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  Speaker 3: other My other passion to is you know, production. I
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  Speaker 3: started a production company and been doing different real show
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  Speaker 3: scripted shows. So somebody that I'm working with now wants
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  Speaker 3: to do a reality show and they're like, well, you know,
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  Speaker 3: isn't don't they tell you what to do? And I've
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  Speaker 3: been on a few reality shows too myself. I go, know,
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  Speaker 3: they give you an idea. So it's like, let's say,
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  Speaker 3: oh I swatted the fly. All right, well yeah you
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  Speaker 3: swatted the fly, but now you killed the fly, you
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  Speaker 3: killed the person.
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  Speaker 2: You know.
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  Speaker 3: The they amp up everything that happens. So it's something
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  Speaker 3: that happens, but it's more amped up.
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  Speaker 2: I call it.
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  Speaker 4: They put a battery in your back, yes, right, So
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  Speaker 4: each scene that comes in, they put a battery in
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  Speaker 4: your back, and they're like, scurry on it. Yes, see
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  Speaker 4: what you can make happen from this? So that's really and.
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  Speaker 3: It's embellished, but it's something that usually happens, but embellished.
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  Speaker 4: And I have a gentleman I know. His name is
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  Speaker 4: Ray Holliday. I remember when the whole reality thing was
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  Speaker 4: going on, we were doing I don't know, we were
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  Speaker 4: hosting something together, and one thing he said to me,
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  Speaker 4: he was like, wow, you're like reality show especially. He
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  Speaker 4: was like, You're so different because you kind of scurried
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  Speaker 4: away from every fight that could have ever happened.
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  Speaker 2: I'm a business swawman, you know the way I am too.
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  Speaker 3: I mean, I don't drive me wrong. I do, like
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  Speaker 3: you know, I can be confrontational when I have to
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  Speaker 3: be in the business world, but you know, I don't.
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  Speaker 2: When I've ever.
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  Speaker 3: Been offered to do something, I always wait up, going
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  Speaker 3: is this going to hurt my business?
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  Speaker 2: Or is this going to help my business?
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  Speaker 4: And that was always in the back of my head.
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  Speaker 4: That was one of the things. I mean, I think
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  Speaker 4: if I'm on a subway platform and somebody steps to me,
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  Speaker 4: I think I would handle it completely differently than when
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  Speaker 4: I'm being thrown into a scene and you don't know
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  Speaker 4: how it's all going to be, you know, cut and
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  Speaker 4: and edit it.
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  Speaker 2: I feel like I.
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  Speaker 4: Saidered myself sometimes too. I mean, when I look back,
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  Speaker 4: I'm like, I should have done a little bit more.
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  Speaker 2: I should have done.
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  Speaker 4: Twenty thirteen. I want to say twenty twelve.
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  Speaker 2: Would you ever do another show again? I would.
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  Speaker 4: There's a few different opportunities that have come up. I
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  Speaker 4: don't know if I would do like a ensemble cast
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  Speaker 4: unless it was something that you know, where I'm talking
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  Speaker 4: about my specialty or my expertise and something you know,
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  Speaker 4: I would. I would want it more in an educational
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  Speaker 4: way rather than it being an ensemble cast. But who
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  Speaker 4: knows what can come up. I just don't know if
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  Speaker 4: i'd want to do like a Caddy reality show. You know, Yeah,
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  Speaker 4: I agree, it depends.
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  Speaker 2: I want to do something that's fun.
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  Speaker 3: And it's so a couple of things, like, even though
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  Speaker 3: I'm involved in it, I had to I had to
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  Speaker 3: be fun. I said, I don't want negativity and I
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  Speaker 3: don't want that. And if I have to film for
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  Speaker 3: thirteen weeks where I have to be away from my
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  Speaker 3: business and it's going to take away from my income
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  Speaker 3: and everything else, it's got to be something that's going
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  Speaker 3: to be fun and be uplifting.
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  Speaker 4: That yeah, and where they're teaching people something right, you
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  Speaker 4: know exactly? I you know, I've been a stylist. I
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  Speaker 4: want to show room for so many years. All I've
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  Speaker 4: done is fashion since I was fifteen years old, and
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  Speaker 4: you know they stylish.
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  Speaker 2: Thank you. This is my street clothes today. I love.
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  Speaker 2: This is the last I just kind of look.
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  Speaker 4: It's comfy but a little she Yeah, it's your jewelry
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  Speaker 4: to it. You know, where if there is drama, there's
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  Speaker 4: there's a come out of it at the end of it,
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  Speaker 4: you know, and.
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  Speaker 2: There's something that you learned from it.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like right, it's not just like I'm going
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  Speaker 3: to go punch this person in the face and you
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  Speaker 3: know we're going to just have drama.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, drink at them and that's it.
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  Speaker 1: No.
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  Speaker 4: No, Yeah, like I could see myself, you know. There
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  Speaker 4: there was an idea thrown out, but to go into
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  Speaker 4: retail stores that are in their demise and bring them
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  Speaker 4: back up again, you know, and teach the store owners
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  Speaker 4: how to run their businesses.
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  Speaker 2: That would be great.
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  Speaker 4: To merchandize their stores and the correct hangers to use
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  Speaker 4: and the and the brands to buy, and how to
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  Speaker 4: train your customer, your your you know, your workers in
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  Speaker 4: good customer service at all.
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  Speaker 3: For these kids, we that should be a reality show.
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  Speaker 3: We need to train to train these kids on service
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  Speaker 3: or work ethic right and worth the ethic. I really
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  Speaker 3: definitely think we talked about that on my last guest too,
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  Speaker 3: that it's like they think they're doing you a favor
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  Speaker 3: by serving you coffee. Like, dude, come on, stop, take
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  Speaker 3: a little pride in what you're doing. Even look, no
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  Speaker 3: matter what I know, probably the same way as me.
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  Speaker 3: You're you know, you are from Afghanistan. My parents are
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  Speaker 3: from Sicily. You know, we were brought up differently as women,
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  Speaker 3: and you know, we were made had to get married,
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  Speaker 3: had to have kids.
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  Speaker 2: That's it.
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  Speaker 3: There's no career, there's no deest you know, that's all
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  Speaker 3: came generations later.
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  Speaker 2: That was you know. So, but you take.
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  Speaker 3: Pride and no matter what you did, no matter if
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  Speaker 3: you swept the chimney, like what's my father said.
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  Speaker 2: You have to take pride in what you do.
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  Speaker 4: And there's levels, right, you can't just think, oh, I'm
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  Speaker 4: worth one hundred you know, one hundred grand salary. I
• 8:45
  Speaker 4: just got out of college. I have no work experience.
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  Speaker 4: I mean, you know, my parents have been together for
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  Speaker 4: over fifty years. My parents got married when they were
• 8:53
  Speaker 4: sixteen and eighteen years old. Now I am leading a
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  Speaker 4: completely different life than them. I'm not leading the life
• 9:00
  Speaker 4: that they probably soft for their daughter. Yeah, Like, I'm
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  Speaker 4: not married, i don't have children. I've been a career woman.
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  Speaker 4: That's my whole life.
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  Speaker 2: That's totally.
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  Speaker 4: I'm living a complete very you know, and I've worked very,
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  Speaker 4: very hard. And then there's sometimes where I feel like
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  Speaker 4: my parents don't even think the things I have done
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  Speaker 4: are on a level of importance, right because for them
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  Speaker 4: it's you know, family and kids.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah. Completely, you don't have a husband and you don't
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  Speaker 2: have anything.
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  Speaker 4: Right, But I've worked sixteen hour days, I've traveled the
• 9:31
  Speaker 4: whole world. I've managed teams, I've done really important things.
• 9:35
  Speaker 4: I've had amazing opportunities. But to them, because they're so
• 9:38
  Speaker 4: old school, those things aren't as lucrative as if you know,
• 9:43
  Speaker 4: I lived in a gated community with like my Mercedes
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  Speaker 4: benz or range Rover and my husband.
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  Speaker 2: Exactly, maybe you should.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's true, Listen, I have three daughters.
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  Speaker 2: I want that. I do want them to have a
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  Speaker 2: stable family life.
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  Speaker 3: I want them to be, you know, be moms, but
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  Speaker 3: I also want them to have careers.
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  Speaker 2: I want them to balance it and you can balance it.
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  Speaker 3: If you can, but you have to understand that, you know,
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  Speaker 3: some things might suffer for that, and or you have
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  Speaker 3: to say, you know, I don't. I'm very I have
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  Speaker 3: my own business too, but I don't want to work
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  Speaker 3: one hundred hours a week. I worked sixty hours a week.
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  Speaker 3: That still a lot, But I tried to keep a
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  Speaker 3: balance with my home because I didn't want to lose
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  Speaker 3: that much time with my children, even though I did,
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  Speaker 3: but I'd also a lot, but I tried to make
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  Speaker 3: it where at least I had like one or two
• 10:31
  Speaker 3: days I know I could spend with them during the week.
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  Speaker 4: I feel like as my generation and you know, our generation,
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  Speaker 4: I feel like we've ruined it.
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  Speaker 1: You know.
• 10:41
  Speaker 4: I think I heard you say earlier about feminism. I'm
• 10:45
  Speaker 4: totally not a feminist myself either. I'm very old school.
• 10:48
  Speaker 4: I do feel that everybody plays a role, but I'm
• 10:51
  Speaker 4: kind of I was born in this generation where people
• 10:55
  Speaker 4: were not wanting to get married for a really long time.
• 10:59
  Speaker 4: I'm forty six now, turning forty seven this year.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's when it started, probably around your you know
• 11:04
  Speaker 3: your day.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm like a very young gen X, very old millennial.
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  Speaker 2: I'm right on the cusp of the two, right, because
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: I'm totally gen X. That's me, We gen x. We
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: we we were crazy.
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  Speaker 3: But I think that the Millennials kind of really ruined it.
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  Speaker 2: I feel they did.
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  Speaker 4: I Yeah, I think like that border is such a
• 11:25
  Speaker 4: weird border because I think there was the baby Boomers
• 11:29
  Speaker 4: and the gen Xes before us, right, which which did
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  Speaker 4: things that kind of trap them in their lives. And
• 11:36
  Speaker 4: you saw them be trapped in their lives, whether it
• 11:39
  Speaker 4: was your uncles, your aunts, you saw them. Think you
• 11:43
  Speaker 4: saw them see life in a different way than you did,
• 11:47
  Speaker 4: and and they had a lot of regrets of not
• 11:49
  Speaker 4: being able to live their lives. I mean, my mom's
• 11:52
  Speaker 4: biggest thing was I want you. You know she's an
• 11:54
  Speaker 4: old school woman, right. Yeah, she got married when she
• 11:57
  Speaker 4: was sixteen, and her job and her head when I
• 12:00
  Speaker 4: was younger was you could be a stewardesst and travel
• 12:03
  Speaker 4: the whole world, right.
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: And that was a big thing.
• 12:06
  Speaker 3: That was a big thing, like like like movie stars
• 12:10
  Speaker 3: and the pilots back then will.
• 12:11
  Speaker 4: Like get you dressed up or they wanted to be
• 12:13
  Speaker 4: or you know I did. I was very smart, you know,
• 12:16
  Speaker 4: because I was or I had to.
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: Be but I was going to college was a big deal. Huge. Well,
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: they wanted me to go to college. I mean, you know,
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: I was a big deal for them.
• 12:26
  Speaker 3: And I know my parents to my father never went
• 12:28
  Speaker 3: to never went to school, and never graduated high school,
• 12:30
  Speaker 3: so it was a big deal.
• 12:32
  Speaker 4: Scholastics were huge, and you know, keeping their daughter close
• 12:35
  Speaker 4: to home was very huge. And I was, you know,
• 12:40
  Speaker 4: honors classes, studio. I'm the only girl. Oh okay, two brothers.
• 12:46
  Speaker 4: I have a younger brother and an older brother. I'm
• 12:49
  Speaker 4: the middle child. I was the youngest for ten years though.
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: How was that getting that younger child? I wanted him.
• 12:56
  Speaker 4: I wanted my mom to have another kid, Like I
• 12:59
  Speaker 4: feel like my brother was my son in some ways,
• 13:02
  Speaker 4: you know, like we talk about soul ties and stuff.
• 13:04
  Speaker 4: I'm like, maybe that's probably why I didn't have kids,
• 13:07
  Speaker 4: because even kind of was somebody so close to me
• 13:10
  Speaker 4: that I didn't took on as my kid, you know.
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  Speaker 2: That's what kind of happened to.
• 13:14
  Speaker 3: My oldest sister was seventeen years older than me, so
• 13:18
  Speaker 3: she never had children. It's funny, both my brothers had kids,
• 13:20
  Speaker 3: and neither one of my sisters had kids, and I'm
• 13:23
  Speaker 3: the baby. So they always I always because I lost
• 13:25
  Speaker 3: my parents when I was young, so I always felt
• 13:27
  Speaker 3: like they took care of me and I was like
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: their child, and my.
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: Kids were like their children.
• 13:32
  Speaker 3: So it was it's it's funny that you say that,
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: because I see that whole you know how that would
• 13:38
  Speaker 3: work with yis.
• 13:39
  Speaker 4: And stuff like and educate, Like we were talking about education.
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: It's huge.
• 13:43
  Speaker 4: I got accepted to go to UC Berkeley to become
• 13:45
  Speaker 4: a lawyer, but my dream was to always work in fashion.
• 13:48
  Speaker 4: And now that I'm older, I'm like, I wonder my
• 13:50
  Speaker 4: life would have been if I just stayed on the
• 13:52
  Speaker 4: law school, you would have been been a little easier
• 13:55
  Speaker 4: for me than the hustle that I'm running now.
• 13:57
  Speaker 3: Maybe met a lawyer, got married, you know, and worked
• 14:01
  Speaker 3: a very full time job and but had kids, but
• 14:04
  Speaker 3: still had that high power position that you had.
• 14:08
  Speaker 2: This is more. You seem more of a creative person.
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: I am very creative, you know, lawyers are.
• 14:14
  Speaker 4: That's where I couldn't see myself.
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: You look more creative to me.
• 14:17
  Speaker 3: So if you know, if your creative wine probably wasn't
• 14:19
  Speaker 3: being fed, you would have not been happy. You would
• 14:22
  Speaker 3: have not been happy, So you would people who are
• 14:24
  Speaker 3: creative have to be fed. I'm creative too, so I
• 14:27
  Speaker 3: know understand that if I'm not being fed, I'm like, uh,
• 14:30
  Speaker 3: I got crazy.
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: I'm like in balance.
• 14:32
  Speaker 4: Yeah, No, I needed to feed my life. I think
• 14:34
  Speaker 4: creativity is love and creativity are the most important things
• 14:38
  Speaker 4: in life, right, Love for friends, run, love for family,
• 14:42
  Speaker 4: love for a partner, and just having love for your life.
• 14:45
  Speaker 4: I think those are really important things. And then creativity.
• 14:48
  Speaker 4: I don't think you have a life unless you're creative.
• 14:50
  Speaker 4: And everyone's got their own creative outlet. I have a
• 14:53
  Speaker 4: little niece. We're all creative. My brother makes stuff. I
• 14:57
  Speaker 4: make stuff. I've worked in fashion. I started a fragrance
• 14:59
  Speaker 4: brain and four years ago after my fashion run of
• 15:03
  Speaker 4: almost twenty years. It's called by Ourzo. So I make
• 15:07
  Speaker 4: a hand blend hand poor. I love that fragrances sample. Oh,
• 15:11
  Speaker 4: I brought you a little. I brought you a little.
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: I brought you a.
• 15:14
  Speaker 4: Little set of stuff. So I start with making the
• 15:17
  Speaker 4: oils and then I create, you know, bath and body
• 15:19
  Speaker 4: products and fragrance. Home fragrants out of it, so candles, uh, scrubs, lotions,
• 15:24
  Speaker 4: but all on the level of like a lay labo.
• 15:27
  Speaker 4: I don't know if you've ever gone into the Laylabo
• 15:29
  Speaker 4: store where they blend.
• 15:30
  Speaker 3: Yes, I've heard of it.
• 15:34
  Speaker 2: I love that. Yeah, you is that what your mean
• 15:37
  Speaker 2: business is?
• 15:37
  Speaker 4: That's my main business. I started it out of my
• 15:40
  Speaker 4: kitchen over over COVID and now I just I come
• 15:45
  Speaker 4: from the wholesale industry from fashion, but I went direct
• 15:48
  Speaker 4: to retail. When I started the business just e commerce,
• 15:51
  Speaker 4: it was literally from my kitchen and my living room
• 15:56
  Speaker 4: and I turned it into a small six figure business
• 15:58
  Speaker 4: the first year. So I've been and you know, I'm
• 16:00
  Speaker 4: on my fourth year now. We just started with boutiques.
• 16:03
  Speaker 4: I have about twelve stores in the country. Beautiful that
• 16:05
  Speaker 4: we're selling too, but need some bigger purchase orders. You know,
• 16:09
  Speaker 4: we're just kind of.
• 16:11
  Speaker 3: More ups you feel like it's more you want to
• 16:13
  Speaker 3: go more upscale stores or would you willing to go into.
• 16:16
  Speaker 4: No resorts stores. I mean, I can do private label,
• 16:19
  Speaker 4: right like I can change my brand and not have
• 16:22
  Speaker 4: it be my brand and do under the carpet business
• 16:25
  Speaker 4: with some of these like lower lower stores. But if
• 16:28
  Speaker 4: it's my label, it's finer. The price points a little
• 16:30
  Speaker 4: bit higher, Like you know, candles for eight ounce or
• 16:33
  Speaker 4: about fifty dollars right, more resorty stores like w hotels,
• 16:39
  Speaker 4: you know, the Lowes stores and those kind of.
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: Those kind of a stuff.
• 16:44
  Speaker 4: Yeah, because the sensor luxury. They're not cupcakes and fruit.
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: No. No, yes, that's true. That's true. That's that's amazing.
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: And you started during COVID.
• 16:54
  Speaker 3: A lot of people but I think even though people
• 16:56
  Speaker 3: locked in, a lot of people became creative during COVID
• 16:59
  Speaker 3: because they do.
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: It was my hobby.
• 17:02
  Speaker 4: But I just was like, literally a year before that,
• 17:06
  Speaker 4: I had a friend in California I've known since second grade.
• 17:08
  Speaker 4: She's a pharmaceutical sales rep. And she was like, what
• 17:11
  Speaker 4: have you been doing lately? I was like, I don't
• 17:12
  Speaker 4: not making candles. I was like, I was so sick
• 17:14
  Speaker 4: of spending on hundred and fifty dollars on candles. I've
• 17:16
  Speaker 4: just been making them. My grandmother taught me how to
• 17:18
  Speaker 4: make fragrance when I was younger, just like bath products.
• 17:22
  Speaker 4: You know, old school cultures, they know how to do
• 17:24
  Speaker 4: all that sort of home remedies, home medicines.
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: So it was just.
• 17:28
  Speaker 4: Something I and then you know, University of YouTube, but
• 17:31
  Speaker 4: combination of both of that together, and also I am
• 17:35
  Speaker 4: a single woman. I have to support myself and I
• 17:37
  Speaker 4: can't just live off of stuff, so I had to
• 17:39
  Speaker 4: figure out how to be creative. So the year before
• 17:42
  Speaker 4: that started making these candles. And then Christmas, right before
• 17:46
  Speaker 4: COVID hit, my friend was like, I need to buy
• 17:48
  Speaker 4: fifty gifts, but I can only buy food. Can you
• 17:50
  Speaker 4: invoice me for the candles? But say their food?
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: I'm like, well they are soy, so they are food.
• 17:56
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's great and they love them. Whoever received, so I.
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: Can't wait to get to try it, and I'm so excited.
• 18:03
  Speaker 4: So that was kind of the thing. But again, entrepreneur life,
• 18:06
  Speaker 4: it's a hustle and a hustle. Some months are greater
• 18:09
  Speaker 4: than others, you know, I mean, you're an entrepreneur yourself.
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: I am.
• 18:13
  Speaker 3: I built the business out of a destruction of a marriage.
• 18:19
  Speaker 4: Okay, mine was the destruction of a relationship.
• 18:22
  Speaker 3: It was it was you know, it was the rug
• 18:26
  Speaker 3: was pulled out from the door was pulled out from
• 18:28
  Speaker 3: you know, trap door was pulled out from under me.
• 18:30
  Speaker 3: And you know, it was either I was going to
• 18:32
  Speaker 3: succeed or it wasn't a divorce or just a way
• 18:35
  Speaker 3: it was prison. Yeah, it was bad.
• 18:37
  Speaker 2: It was. So I was like, either got arrested. Yes, okay,
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: God tail for a long time. So I was either
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: gonna pack it in or I was going to excel.
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: And how many kids did you have?
• 18:50
  Speaker 3: And went back to school to become a nurse practitioner
• 18:54
  Speaker 3: and started my own business because.
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: I had to. Were you a housewife before that?
• 18:59
  Speaker 3: I was a SI I I was. I worked full time,
• 19:02
  Speaker 3: but I only worked at this point. I only started
• 19:04
  Speaker 3: working full time when I was thirty.
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: You know, doing the same thing I was. I became
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: a nurse when I was thirty. I went home with.
• 19:10
  Speaker 3: My kids until then, and then I went back to
• 19:13
  Speaker 3: school and I started working. And then I'm like, you know,
• 19:17
  Speaker 3: I loved working in the hospital, but I'm like, I
• 19:19
  Speaker 3: got to do something else because this is just not
• 19:21
  Speaker 3: enough money. And I loved injectibles and I loved being
• 19:25
  Speaker 3: an injector, and I said, this is it.
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: I'm going to do it.
• 19:27
  Speaker 3: And I took my chance, and now I have my
• 19:30
  Speaker 3: business now. So it was at a destruction that came erupted.
• 19:34
  Speaker 3: This you know this this this you.
• 19:37
  Speaker 4: Know business, well, lots of beauty comes from destruction. And
• 19:40
  Speaker 4: I'm a scorpio, so I am you know, I always
• 19:43
  Speaker 4: rise up like the feet and then I burned down
• 19:46
  Speaker 4: in ashes and recreate and regrow and build myself back up.
• 19:50
  Speaker 4: I mean that's really I'm you know, controlled by the
• 19:53
  Speaker 4: planet Pluto.
• 19:54
  Speaker 2: So it's like.
• 19:55
  Speaker 4: Total destruction but total rebuilding. And you know, I was
• 19:59
  Speaker 4: kind of like moving away from the fashion industry before that.
• 20:02
  Speaker 4: I started my business when I was twenty seven. It
• 20:05
  Speaker 4: was about fifteen years of having a showroom business, and
• 20:07
  Speaker 4: it just changed a lot. Retails changed, fashion has changed.
• 20:10
  Speaker 4: Everything was changing, and it was probably the best thing
• 20:13
  Speaker 4: I did with COVID coming. I mean, I can't imagine
• 20:16
  Speaker 4: having my space, you know, in the fashion district while
• 20:20
  Speaker 4: COVID was happening.
• 20:21
  Speaker 2: And yeah, a lot of things changed.
• 20:23
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and it's still changed, and I can't believe it's
• 20:25
  Speaker 3: already almost five years since now.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: But it isn't that crazy. Yeah, well, we went through.
• 20:30
  Speaker 3: It was nuts. It was crazy. I can't believe it.
• 20:32
  Speaker 3: But people lost a lot. But I think also people
• 20:35
  Speaker 3: got closer during COVID. I know, my family got closer.
• 20:38
  Speaker 3: You know, things will you know, people had to live
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: simple lives then, and you know what.
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: Maybe maybe that's better.
• 20:44
  Speaker 3: I don't know, maybe it might be better because it was
• 20:45
  Speaker 3: kind of as much as it was a blessing a curse,
• 20:48
  Speaker 3: it was also a blessing.
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: I think I loved it. Yeah, I loved I did.
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: I loved it too. I loved code, not that I
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: let it go it. I love being locked up, but
• 20:57
  Speaker 2: I loved being my family.
• 20:59
  Speaker 4: And I love the hot the fact of not having FOMO, Like,
• 21:02
  Speaker 4: I didn't feel the fear of missing out. I didn't
• 21:04
  Speaker 4: feel like I was missing out on anything. I didn't
• 21:06
  Speaker 4: feel like I had to show up for anything and
• 21:09
  Speaker 4: working so much. It was the first time where like
• 21:11
  Speaker 4: I could sleep, I could just like in the middle
• 21:14
  Speaker 4: of the day's sleep.
• 21:15
  Speaker 2: When does that ever happen? Never?
• 21:17
  Speaker 4: So I kind of liked it, you know. And I
• 21:20
  Speaker 4: think there was so much funding and stuff that none
• 21:22
  Speaker 4: of us.
• 21:23
  Speaker 2: You know, yeah needed to worry.
• 21:25
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it wasn't a big worry thing, but I did
• 21:29
  Speaker 4: need to create. I did create something that I feel
• 21:33
  Speaker 4: is me and it's definitely my next chapter in my life.
• 21:37
  Speaker 4: As to where I am now in my mid forties, right.
• 21:40
  Speaker 3: Well that's still young, foss, because our life span is
• 21:43
  Speaker 3: so much, you know, at this.
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: Point, Like but they say we're middle aged now, I
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: will I know, I'm fifty four, half a century old.
• 21:54
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you're my brother, you're yeah, you're around my older brother.
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: It just turned I just turned fifty four.
• 21:59
  Speaker 4: I mean, they don't tell you that when you're younger,
• 22:02
  Speaker 4: that you're middle aged at forty because if you really
• 22:04
  Speaker 4: think about it, most people die around eighty, yeah, five
• 22:07
  Speaker 4: or whatever.
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: I didn't think about that.
• 22:09
  Speaker 4: And then living in New York City and tell me
• 22:12
  Speaker 4: if I'm wrong, I know you're right. Are you in
• 22:14
  Speaker 4: long I understand, I'm in Queen I'm in Queen's Okay, Okay,
• 22:17
  Speaker 4: I bought a lot of Queens of Brooklyn. I think
• 22:19
  Speaker 4: living in New York, like the average age right now
• 22:22
  Speaker 4: for women to have a baby is what forty two
• 22:24
  Speaker 4: or forty three. You're constantly told you have time, you
• 22:27
  Speaker 4: have time, you have time. And then my last relationship,
• 22:30
  Speaker 4: which was in my early forties, thinking that this is
• 22:34
  Speaker 4: going to be it and it doesn't.
• 22:35
  Speaker 2: I didn't have time.
• 22:39
  Speaker 4: You don't take into account those moments where and coming
• 22:43
  Speaker 4: from the background that I come from, I never wanted
• 22:45
  Speaker 4: to have a baby out of wedlock. Yeah, you know,
• 22:47
  Speaker 4: it's not that I never had the opportunity to have
• 22:50
  Speaker 4: a child. I wanted a husband. I never wanted the
• 22:54
  Speaker 4: baby mama label on my head. But at this age,
• 22:57
  Speaker 4: looking back, it doesn't matter.
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: Yea and cares. It doesn't matter.
• 23:02
  Speaker 3: If listen, If your life is your life, and you're
• 23:05
  Speaker 3: happy what you've accomplished in your life, that's all that
• 23:08
  Speaker 3: mud is it?
• 23:09
  Speaker 2: Having? Am I not being in the clots for you
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: to have children?
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: And it's okay, yeah, you know what, It's okay.
• 23:15
  Speaker 4: But it also would have been okay to be a
• 23:16
  Speaker 4: baby mama. That's what I'm saying.
• 23:18
  Speaker 3: Okay, it would have been okay to be a baby
• 23:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah too, It's okay, it's fine, But.
• 23:23
  Speaker 4: It goes back to old, old school cultural parents. Somebody
• 23:27
  Speaker 4: said this to me recently, just this fashion week. It
• 23:30
  Speaker 4: was you know, sometimes you meet random spirits. Didn't know him,
• 23:34
  Speaker 4: he was a stranger.
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: And they say the greatest things to you. Right.
• 23:37
  Speaker 4: It was the best line to me. And he was like, oh,
• 23:40
  Speaker 4: how old are you?
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: You know? We were just saying, oh, you don't have children.
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: It was like, god if it.
• 23:43
  Speaker 4: I was like, but they say women are getting pregnant
• 23:46
  Speaker 4: in their forties and mid forties. I'm like, if it
• 23:48
  Speaker 4: happened now, I'd keep it, you know. But he said,
• 23:52
  Speaker 4: and I said, you know, for me, it was always
• 23:55
  Speaker 4: the way my parents had control over my mind and
• 23:58
  Speaker 4: the decisions I made was for them a lot, right,
• 24:02
  Speaker 4: And he said, you know what it is. They say
• 24:04
  Speaker 4: that your parents are your first cult that you have
• 24:06
  Speaker 4: to break away from. Wow, do you have much that
• 24:11
  Speaker 4: set in with me?
• 24:11
  Speaker 2: Jen?
• 24:12
  Speaker 4: And I said, wow, that is so true because the
• 24:16
  Speaker 4: way my parents condition my head and my brain as
• 24:19
  Speaker 4: to thinking like, oh my god, I'll never want to
• 24:21
  Speaker 4: be a baby mom or have a baby out of wedlock,
• 24:24
  Speaker 4: it was kind of their conditioning.
• 24:26
  Speaker 2: Yes it was.
• 24:27
  Speaker 3: It wasn't and you know what it would have been,
• 24:29
  Speaker 3: Okay if you had a baby and you weren't.
• 24:31
  Speaker 4: Yeah, but you're thinking all about that, and then it's
• 24:33
  Speaker 4: like your parents are older, they're gonna pass, and then
• 24:37
  Speaker 4: you're going to be left with your family, right exactly,
• 24:40
  Speaker 4: So you don't you know, I don't know. I guess
• 24:43
  Speaker 4: for me being first generation, that that cult of the parents. Yeah,
• 24:48
  Speaker 4: they had a good hold on my head, you know,
• 24:51
  Speaker 4: So I would have changed a couple of things like that.
• 24:54
  Speaker 4: I would have been like, fine, I'm gonna have a
• 24:55
  Speaker 4: baby out of wedlock, right, it would have been And you.
• 24:57
  Speaker 3: Wan, we talked about if you would have one out
• 24:59
  Speaker 3: of what red luck is much as you thought your
• 25:00
  Speaker 3: parents weren't going to be can't we'd be upset about it.
• 25:03
  Speaker 2: They would have loved that baby anyway, I know I
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: need about that, and.
• 25:08
  Speaker 4: Because they're all things that are now coming.
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but you know what, they would have been fine.
• 25:13
  Speaker 3: They might have been like the first but when that
• 25:16
  Speaker 3: baby would have borne, it would have been It would
• 25:17
  Speaker 3: have been.
• 25:17
  Speaker 4: Fun because I see them with my brother's kids. And
• 25:19
  Speaker 4: of course my brothers are both married. My one brother
• 25:22
  Speaker 4: has four kids, the other one has But you're.
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: Ants in the world. Oh my god, what I'm like.
• 25:27
  Speaker 4: I went to like my when my niece turned twenty one,
• 25:30
  Speaker 4: we went to the you know, like go to the
• 25:32
  Speaker 4: bar together. We look like we're sisters.
• 25:34
  Speaker 3: Like I love that, and I must love spending time
• 25:39
  Speaker 3: with you too. They do you know, you also have
• 25:41
  Speaker 3: those blessings absolutely.
• 25:42
  Speaker 4: And so absolutely I don't feel like I'm missing out
• 25:45
  Speaker 4: on anything. But I that comment that gentlemen said to
• 25:48
  Speaker 4: me was your parents are your first cult you have
• 25:51
  Speaker 4: to break free from.
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: I was like, huh, interesting, because some.
• 25:55
  Speaker 4: People rebel, some children will rebel against everything their parents say. Absolutely,
• 25:59
  Speaker 4: and I definitely didn't do what they wanted me to do,
• 26:03
  Speaker 4: but which.
• 26:03
  Speaker 3: You did not do it either, you did not do it,
• 26:06
  Speaker 3: so it was like a double edge short for you.
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: Well, i'm sure they're very proud of you. Yes, yes, yeah,
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: I'm sure.
• 26:14
  Speaker 3: How could they not look at you? It's amazing what
• 26:17
  Speaker 3: you've accomplished. And you were half a century old. Oh
• 26:20
  Speaker 3: my god, it's horrible.
• 26:21
  Speaker 2: It's so bad. It's all last la.
• 26:24
  Speaker 3: It's not nineteen twenty because we'd be dead by now,
• 26:26
  Speaker 3: because half life was twenty five years old.
• 26:28
  Speaker 4: Then well, the good thing is we do look better
• 26:31
  Speaker 4: now we ever have. And you know, when I was younger,
• 26:34
  Speaker 4: when you were thirty thirty five, and it was old.
• 26:38
  Speaker 3: I know, there was only like certain parents that looked
• 26:40
  Speaker 3: really good like my parents were those parents that looked
• 26:43
  Speaker 3: extremely awesome like, but they're not.
• 26:46
  Speaker 2: Everybody's parents look like that.
• 26:47
  Speaker 4: My mom looks great, parents look like that.
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: In those days, everybody looked old. I think it's just
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: it was just this.
• 26:54
  Speaker 3: Everything was greasy and all like think about the seventies
• 26:58
  Speaker 3: was greasy, hairy and brown, that's what it was.
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: And brown paneling.
• 27:02
  Speaker 3: It was like the ugliest style close like and the
• 27:05
  Speaker 3: and the browns and the oranges and the Martards, and
• 27:09
  Speaker 3: it was just the way it looks the portrayed in
• 27:11
  Speaker 3: the movies is the way it was.
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: It was just so it was like no colors.
• 27:15
  Speaker 3: It was just brown and and everybody's hair was greasy
• 27:19
  Speaker 3: and and they just looked everybody looked old on their years.
• 27:22
  Speaker 4: And you just explained the pantone my retro seventies.
• 27:26
  Speaker 3: And that's how you picture it, right, paneling on the wall, copet.
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: It's just brown perfect.
• 27:35
  Speaker 4: I do like some of the pieces, don't get me wrong,
• 27:37
  Speaker 4: like the Little Moon and Lava l I.
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: Do, but the put the mood, I don't know.
• 27:42
  Speaker 3: It was creepy, and the New York was dirty, was filthy.
• 27:47
  Speaker 3: I mean, it's almost as filthy as it was than now,
• 27:50
  Speaker 3: but it was filthy that it was gross.
• 27:53
  Speaker 2: So I don't know.
• 27:54
  Speaker 3: I think now it's like like you said, we look
• 27:57
  Speaker 3: much better, but you know what, we still are that
• 28:00
  Speaker 3: like some days I wake up I feel like I'm eighteen,
• 28:02
  Speaker 3: and other days I wake up I feel like I'm eighty.
• 28:04
  Speaker 4: No, I know, I was looking at my pictures from
• 28:06
  Speaker 4: the photos we took last night, and I was like,
• 28:09
  Speaker 4: I feel old. I was like, let me wash on
• 28:15
  Speaker 4: my face a little bit more today.
• 28:18
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 28:18
  Speaker 3: You do too, Jack, So why don't you tell everybody
• 28:20
  Speaker 3: where we can find you? So are you selling online?
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah?
• 28:25
  Speaker 4: Yeah, selling online by our Zo dot com. So there's
• 28:28
  Speaker 4: of course the fragrances and all the products I make.
• 28:31
  Speaker 4: And then we have a curated section on the site
• 28:33
  Speaker 4: too that is my jewelry.
• 28:35
  Speaker 2: And you know is that you piece because I loved that.
• 28:39
  Speaker 2: I was watching it, I was looking at it, I
• 28:40
  Speaker 2: was covering it all.
• 28:42
  Speaker 4: Yeah, this one too, So I make these customs, so
• 28:45
  Speaker 4: that's on there just because you'll never take my you know,
• 28:48
  Speaker 4: my stylist background away from me. So it's a curated
• 28:51
  Speaker 4: section there. And then I also still do consulting with
• 28:54
  Speaker 4: brands and you know, buyers or anybody that wants to
• 28:57
  Speaker 4: get into the fashion industry, and that's called blenche room
• 29:00
  Speaker 4: dot com.
• 29:00
  Speaker 2: That's my consulting. Doesn't love that? And what about social media?
• 29:03
  Speaker 4: Social media? So just my name Arzo on our and
• 29:08
  Speaker 4: then at by ourza would be my brand.
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: Okay, I'm gonna stop following you too. I think I
• 29:13
  Speaker 2: did follow you.
• 29:14
  Speaker 4: I can't wait to hear what you think about the suns.
• 29:16
  Speaker 3: I'm so excited to try it. I'm so happy to
• 29:19
  Speaker 3: that you came on the show, and I'm happy to try.
• 29:21
  Speaker 3: I can't wait to try your products. And I love okay,
• 29:23
  Speaker 3: I love everything. I love all that stuff it's and
• 29:25
  Speaker 3: I just got a brand new bathroom in my house
• 29:27
  Speaker 3: with a steam room and a beautiful tub, so I
• 29:29
  Speaker 3: can't wait to light it and sit there with the can.
• 29:31
  Speaker 4: Get you diffuse it for your bathroom and in your
• 29:33
  Speaker 4: in your medspa as well too.
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: I would love that. Yeah, we're got to talk about that.
• 29:38
  Speaker 4: Okay, So we have some we have some stuff to
• 29:40
  Speaker 4: talk about.
• 29:40
  Speaker 2: Okay. Thank you for having me.
• 29:42
  Speaker 3: It was so nice to have you on and I
• 29:44
  Speaker 3: love to have you back again too, And thank you
• 29:46
  Speaker 3: for coming on the show. And thank you everybody for
• 29:49
  Speaker 3: tuning in. And I like to thank my sponsored Dolcy
• 29:51
  Speaker 3: Being Cafe for old school Italian cafe right in the
• 29:54
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• 29:55
  Speaker 2: You need to try them.
• 29:56
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• 30:07
  Speaker 2: Everybody, have a great day. Thank you for tuning in.