Latest / The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast / Get Your Glow On | Enneagram Seven Christa Hardin

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Get Your Glow On | Enneagram Seven Christa Hardin · The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast

0:00
SPEAKER_00: Take time because I think that's the number one thing we're all stressed about, and I'm guilty of it myself sometimes, but we're just grabbing at life with both hands, and it's exciting and it's blocking us from doing some of our processing because we want to see what's around the corner.
0:19
SPEAKER_00: And I think that taking time looks different for everybody because even if you're not a future thinker, you might be like my husband, a one, and saying, Well, I'm not a future thinker, but I'm going to be on my checklist all day.
0:32
SPEAKER_00: And maybe I'm a nine.
0:34
SPEAKER_00: And even though I'm a past thinker, I'm still kind of scattered with my to-do list.
0:38
SPEAKER_00: So a lot of us are just, like I said, grabbing at life or grabbing at phones.
0:42
SPEAKER_00: And the biggest gift I think you can give yourself is to take time to pause.
0:53
SPEAKER_02: I am Amy Wicks, and you are listening to the Simply Wholehearted Podcast.
1:00
SPEAKER_02: Welcome to the fifth append season of the podcast created to help you prepare your heart with the joy of Christmas, expand your generosity, and find new traditions to help your family celebrate Jesus' birth.
1:13
SPEAKER_02: If you've ever struggled with frustration, anxiety, and self-doubt, especially during the holidays, you need to know you are not alone.
1:22
SPEAKER_02: I am here to help you navigate through the overwhelm with faith, Enneagram, and sustainable and practical rhythms for your everyday life.
1:31
SPEAKER_02: So listen along as you stream those holiday lights, walk off those tasty treats, or drive around trying to find that perfect gift.
2:08
SPEAKER_02: And if you joined us for the wholehearted Enneagram Summit this last summer, you might remember our conversation about the Enneagram Glow for relationships.
2:17
SPEAKER_02: Krista joins me this week to share an incredible resource for the new year and your marriage, the Glow Relationship Planner.
2:25
SPEAKER_02: We're gonna dive into some fun Enneagram insights about subtypes, relationships, and even planning tips for 2022.
2:34
SPEAKER_02: Well, Krista, welcome to the Simply Wholehearted Podcast.
2:38
SPEAKER_02: Now, we have gotten to chat before for the wholehearted Enneagram Summit of 21, but today it's a podcast conversation.
2:48
SPEAKER_02: I'm so excited to have you back.
2:50
SPEAKER_00: I'm so excited to be back.
2:52
SPEAKER_00: I love you so much, Amy.
2:53
SPEAKER_00: You're awesome.
2:54
SPEAKER_02: Oh, you're sweet.
2:55
SPEAKER_02: We were just saying, honestly, before we hit record, I'm like, it's just like having an old friend back on the podcast.
3:02
SPEAKER_02: I was really looking forward to this spot in my calendar.
3:05
SPEAKER_02: Me too.
3:06
SPEAKER_01: Yay.
3:07
SPEAKER_01: I'm so with you 100%.
3:08
SPEAKER_01: And I love that we're two sevens doing all of this too.
3:11
SPEAKER_02: I know.
3:12
SPEAKER_02: It's so good.
3:12
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I think that's probably the magic here.
3:15
SPEAKER_02: Two Enneagram sevens.
3:16
SPEAKER_02: You never know what's gonna happen.
3:17
SPEAKER_02: First, I'm gonna dive in.
3:19
SPEAKER_02: I've been having fun asking my guests lately.
3:22
SPEAKER_02: If we were a creeper and we were peeking in your window, tell us kind of what we would see.
3:29
SPEAKER_02: What is happening in the life of Krista right now?
3:33
SPEAKER_00: Oh, you are so cute.
3:35
SPEAKER_00: Well, um, tonight is a particular night in Krista's life because my husband Wes and I are finishing up writing the script for our mystery dinner parties that we create and sell.
3:48
SPEAKER_00: So tomorrow he will be on the Joy FM talking about this.
3:53
SPEAKER_00: So we did a soft launch and played our first run of our newest Christmas game called Crime Scene Christmas.
3:58
SPEAKER_00: And then, as I said, tomorrow we really fully launch In West is on the Joy FM sharing about it to a million people.
4:05
SPEAKER_02: Oh gosh, okay.
4:07
SPEAKER_02: Sign me up right now.
4:08
SPEAKER_02: I'm placing my order.
4:09
SPEAKER_02: How did I not know this?
4:11
SPEAKER_02: This is like so great.
4:13
SPEAKER_01: That's hilarious.
4:15
SPEAKER_01: That's just one of those, like you said, like I'm glad you asked that question because you just catch things you wouldn't know.
4:20
SPEAKER_00: But we just love bringing couples fun.
4:22
SPEAKER_00: So we play mystery games and it's PDF kits.
4:26
SPEAKER_00: So we're selling those right now.
4:28
SPEAKER_02: I love it, Krista.
4:29
SPEAKER_02: That is the coolest, so much fun.
4:32
SPEAKER_02: Seriously.
4:33
SPEAKER_02: I've never actually got to do an official mystery dinner.
4:38
SPEAKER_02: I think I've attempted a couple times.
4:40
SPEAKER_02: I have some like foggy memories back there, but I think this is time for me.
4:45
SPEAKER_02: I mean, it's so fitting.
4:46
SPEAKER_02: Like, what in agram seven doesn't want to do this sort of thing?
4:51
SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
4:51
SPEAKER_02: I'm sending you one, you get one.
4:53
SPEAKER_02: So you can pick one of our six games.
4:56
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
4:57
SPEAKER_02: I can't wait.
4:58
SPEAKER_02: Well, I'm having a house full of 12 over this Christmas holiday season.
5:03
SPEAKER_02: So yes.
5:04
SPEAKER_02: And my birthday happens to be December 27th.
5:07
SPEAKER_02: So you can probably guess what I'll be doing and demanding of everybody.
5:11
SPEAKER_01: Oh, that is literally perfect because they're for eight to 20 people.
5:15
SPEAKER_01: So you got it.
5:16
SPEAKER_02: I got it covered.
5:17
SPEAKER_02: All right.
5:18
SPEAKER_02: Charcuterie board is ordered.
5:20
SPEAKER_02: We got the party, maybe some fun adult beverages and boom.
5:24
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
5:25
SPEAKER_00: That's hilarious because the charcuterie board is the appetizer round for our Christmas game.
5:30
SPEAKER_00: Are you serious?
5:31
SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh.
5:32
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
5:32
SPEAKER_00: So peeking in our window, we're just like doing research tonight.
5:37
SPEAKER_00: Not even research, we're just my husband's just polishing.
5:40
SPEAKER_00: He's a one.
5:41
SPEAKER_00: So he's polishing.
5:42
SPEAKER_00: Yes, perfect.
5:42
SPEAKER_00: And um, my daughter's making something for the website.
5:45
SPEAKER_00: So yeah, we're just hanging out after the girls get done with dance.
5:48
SPEAKER_00: And my son is maybe got theater.
5:50
SPEAKER_00: I think I'm getting a haircut tonight.
5:51
SPEAKER_00: So clients in the day, homeschooling in the morning.
5:54
SPEAKER_00: We've got it all.
5:55
SPEAKER_02: What I want to give to spend a day with you.
5:57
SPEAKER_02: This just sounds so much fun.
6:00
SPEAKER_02: Oh my gosh, you are so cute.
6:02
SPEAKER_02: Oh, this is fun.
6:04
SPEAKER_02: All right.
6:04
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna like for the sake of my friends listening, I'm going to stop being selfish because I want to keep going on this train.
6:10
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna get us back on the tracks because we're talking about, like I said, my favorite things Enneagram, marriage, planning.
6:20
SPEAKER_02: So for those who maybe didn't get to meet you for the summit and they're getting to meet Krista Harden for the first time.
6:28
SPEAKER_02: Tell us a little bit about your Enneagram journey and what you do, besides this mysteries dinner thing.
6:37
SPEAKER_00: Okay, so I'm Krista, as you guys know, and I've always had a heart for serving couples since I was a little girl.
6:43
SPEAKER_00: I even started working on my parents' marriage, crazy as that sounds.
6:47
SPEAKER_00: But I just loved helping.
6:48
SPEAKER_00: And my dad would say, She's gonna be a lawyer one day.
6:51
SPEAKER_00: But my brother ended up being a lawyer, and I was like, no, I want to help couples.
6:55
SPEAKER_00: So I got to know the Lord in my late teen years, and I was just fascinated to know that there was this whole branch called Christian psychology.
7:05
SPEAKER_00: So I ended up going to um my undergrad was uh bachelor's in communication and psychology double major.
7:12
SPEAKER_00: Then I went to grad school for clinical psychology at a Christian school, which blew my mind.
7:17
SPEAKER_00: So I went to Wheaton College and it was APA accredited and yet paired integrative methods with Christian practice.
7:24
SPEAKER_00: So it was really fun to be able to have the best of science and faith and to respect people of all faith backgrounds too.
7:31
SPEAKER_00: So that was my background is unofficial and officially just loving couples work.
7:35
SPEAKER_00: So I went into marriage and family in Illinois and then in Michigan we moved.
7:40
SPEAKER_00: I went into assessments and being a master's level psychologist.
7:44
SPEAKER_00: When we moved to Florida, I became a coach and as you know, found the Enneagram about five years ago, maybe six years ago now, and it was a life-changing journey for me.
7:57
SPEAKER_00: So it was the best tool, even though I had been doing assessments, which would cost people minimal of a thousand dollars for me to do all these different batteries, like the MMPI and the MBTI and the TAT.
8:08
SPEAKER_00: I'm just kind of saying some of the common battery tests out there.
8:12
SPEAKER_00: Just honestly, Enneagram blew them all away and added to that, as you know, a deep layer of family systems, multi-generational work.
8:21
SPEAKER_00: And it just made such an impact in my own life.
8:23
SPEAKER_00: And in the first couple I tried it out on, which was a three-nine couple, that I was like, I can't go back.
8:29
SPEAKER_00: This is too good to be true.
8:31
SPEAKER_00: So from there, we developed Enneagram in Marriage Podcast, pairing guides, and our newest product, our planner.
8:37
SPEAKER_00: So lots going on because we found such a cool tool as you did too.
8:41
SPEAKER_02: Yes, it's amazing.
8:42
SPEAKER_02: I mean, it really what you're demonstrating is how it put the therapy and the practices that you already did on a like just on a speed of how like turn up the notch on like the speed at which you could create self-awareness and personal development and even spiritual growth, because all of those things immediately take you into the deep waters of like you talked about family of origin, childhood messages, all of those pieces.
9:11
SPEAKER_02: What is it that we really desire?
9:13
SPEAKER_02: I'm sure, like you, what I really have found again and again, especially in like the typing process, even people just have no idea what it is that they really want.
9:21
SPEAKER_02: Like it's there, but they haven't given time or put words to it.
9:25
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's a really good point.
9:27
SPEAKER_00: And you're right, this just cuts to the quick and it helps them to get there a lot faster.
9:32
SPEAKER_00: And doesn't mean the work isn't going to be long-term and ongoing, but so much of therapy is spent just bumbling around if you don't have great tools.
9:41
SPEAKER_00: So it's nice to be able to get focused, that laser focus with this tool.
9:45
SPEAKER_00: It's amazing.
9:46
SPEAKER_02: Yes, I love it.
9:47
SPEAKER_02: It's um a sniper sanctification, as a few of our fellow Enneagram coaches have put it.
9:53
SPEAKER_02: And it's true.
9:55
SPEAKER_00: That's awesome.
9:56
SPEAKER_00: I never heard that.
9:58
SPEAKER_02: Yes, yes.
9:58
SPEAKER_02: And I'm trying to remember to give proper attribution.
10:01
SPEAKER_02: It may have been Tyler Zach, our friend at Gospel for Enneagram.
10:05
SPEAKER_02: So that may have been his quote that has stuck out with me because I'm like, oh yeah, that's true.
10:11
SPEAKER_02: Because the laser, like you said, laser focus gets in there and um gives us the tools that we really need.
10:17
SPEAKER_02: So good.
10:18
SPEAKER_02: Well, I have loved gleaning out so much from you, just either on your Instagram account and podcast.
10:26
SPEAKER_02: There's so much meat, so much meat for people to get, especially um for those of my friends who are married, who are even want to be married, like I'll put you in that category.
10:39
SPEAKER_02: But whether you feel like you're just surviving in your marriage or you're thriving, I really think there's just a gamma of resources that and content that you have provided and put together to really empower us to love the married life and to have it really bring bring about our best selves and help us show up as our best selves in marriage.
11:02
SPEAKER_00: Yes, that's absolutely my heart.
11:04
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for just noticing that.
11:05
SPEAKER_00: And I noticed the same about your amazing work.
11:08
SPEAKER_00: So I'm grateful to you.
11:10
SPEAKER_02: You're awesome.
11:11
SPEAKER_02: You're so kind.
11:12
SPEAKER_02: Well, I would love for you to maybe give a minute to a personal story of how it has helped your marriage.
11:19
SPEAKER_02: You gave an insight, you're a seven, your husband leads as a one.
11:23
SPEAKER_02: What's maybe like one thing that has been a game changer, whether it's with arguments, communication, doing this work together?
11:31
SPEAKER_02: I can imagine, you know, there's a lot of things there, it's been helpful with.
11:35
SPEAKER_00: Initially, the helpful piece was as most of our listeners can probably concur when they found out for their spouse, it was and still is a huge compassion game changer.
11:45
SPEAKER_00: Every time I still get mad at my husband to this day, which is ongoing just because that's life.
11:50
SPEAKER_00: What you're not perfect?
11:52
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
11:53
SPEAKER_00: Nope.
11:53
SPEAKER_00: And I don't like anyone to think would think we were.
11:55
SPEAKER_00: It's like, no way.
11:56
SPEAKER_00: But honestly, it just helps a lot to be able to have the reminders of why he's a one, what he's going for, why he's sensitive in these particular areas, what his sensory issues even are as a one.
12:08
SPEAKER_00: And it's just amazing.
12:10
SPEAKER_00: I recently had a one on my podcast who we did an entire episode on sensory integration and marriage.
12:15
SPEAKER_00: And I can't tell you how important it is for us to realize our spouses have deep issues.
12:22
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes they can't help.
12:24
SPEAKER_00: And just hearing and knowing that was huge.
12:26
SPEAKER_00: The other huge thing for us is lately we've been processing our instincts together.
12:32
SPEAKER_00: He's the social instinct, and I'm the self-preserving.
12:34
SPEAKER_00: And we're just having some beautiful conversations around curiosity.
12:39
SPEAKER_00: Like, I wonder why you long for social and I long for self-preserving.
12:44
SPEAKER_00: And I wonder what we could do to help to foster healthy opposites for each other in these spheres that we're so tied to.
12:52
SPEAKER_02: Oh, that's really good.
12:53
SPEAKER_02: And on my study, the subtypes has been, I think, critical to understand intimacy within our relationships.
13:01
SPEAKER_02: Now, sometimes this does explain some of our framework for friendships, relationships, and how we interact.
13:06
SPEAKER_02: But most of all, you know, this has been a topic that with the women in my living room or in my coaching, we talk about some of the sexual issues that they've encountered too based on these subtypes.
13:16
SPEAKER_02: It does seem to impact it, which I think is just fascinating, right?
13:21
SPEAKER_00: I do too.
13:22
SPEAKER_00: That is absolutely fascinating to think on the ramifications for your sexual life as well.
13:28
SPEAKER_00: And whether you're a social instinct who thinks we should do it this way, or we need to have a certain level of class, or whether you're the self-preserving, I'm scared, I don't want to lose my energy, or that, you know, one-to-one where there might be some dominance themes.
13:42
SPEAKER_00: It's fascinating.
13:44
SPEAKER_02: It really is.
13:44
SPEAKER_02: You know, in Christian circles, sometimes this topic is taboo, which is a shame.
13:48
SPEAKER_02: It doesn't need to be.
13:49
SPEAKER_02: And that's what you and I are in the business to like bust that myth.
13:53
SPEAKER_02: But like that was some of the most helpful sessions that people have come back to me and say, thank you.
13:59
SPEAKER_02: This has revolutionized the conversation around intimacy with my spouse, helped even create a launching point for them to have that conversation, which is like, praise the Lord.
14:11
SPEAKER_02: I'm sorry it took so long, but I'm so glad that you at least feel comfortable talking about it and in a way that is producing good fruit.
14:18
SPEAKER_02: So anyway, exciting Enneagram touches everything, right?
14:23
SPEAKER_01: It is really cool.
14:26
SPEAKER_02: It is okay.
14:28
SPEAKER_02: Well, now that we have gotten to cover a lot of fun topics here, this is the one that you have come on the podcast for.
14:36
SPEAKER_02: And that is we're here.
14:37
SPEAKER_02: We're we're just about hitting Christmas as we record this and as this podcast is being shared.
14:44
SPEAKER_02: You might be listening to this in the new year.
14:46
SPEAKER_02: And of course, this time of year, we're talking about reflection on end goals and how did you do and where are you at and where do you want to be?
14:56
SPEAKER_02: So we're pulling out the planner and we're gonna shine the light on this amazing resource that Krista has put together, which is Enneagram and Marriage Planner.
15:05
SPEAKER_02: So tell us everything, spill the beans, give us like what is this going to be?
15:10
SPEAKER_02: Because this, I think it's really remarkable and pretty fantastic.
15:14
SPEAKER_00: Well, this planner was born out of my husband and I, and I'm sure many of our listeners just going through lots of planners and finding that they had a lot of great ideas for their work life and their daytime life, but not very much for what we really want at the heart of family and the stability that comes from that uh self-preserving and one-to-one subtype before you can really give out well socially.
15:41
SPEAKER_00: So in most planners, we're hitting that social level before we even address the first two levels, which I think really do have an order to them.
15:49
SPEAKER_00: And so I really tried to create this planner out of the desire to give people access regularly to balancing all three centers, their social life, their one-to-one life, and their self-care life, as well as the desire to keep date nights going and then to give them a rhythm and a flow to talk about all of the most important issues in marriage all year long with an element of fun and flexibility.
16:12
SPEAKER_00: So that's what it's all about.
16:14
SPEAKER_00: That's amazing.
16:15
SPEAKER_00: And you packed all of that into one planner.
16:18
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
16:20
SPEAKER_02: Well, you know, we seven are ambitious.
16:23
SPEAKER_02: Yes, we are.
16:24
SPEAKER_02: We so are.
16:26
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
16:26
SPEAKER_02: What does this look like?
16:28
SPEAKER_02: How do I get it?
16:29
SPEAKER_02: What's the day-to-day?
16:30
SPEAKER_02: Like, um, give us some insight on what we could expect or should expect as we get our hands on it or figure out how to get our hands on the planner.
16:41
SPEAKER_00: Okay, so what I would do is I personally, if you're hearing this before January, I would say think of this as a really cool Christmas gift for your friends, for your family, for somebody getting married, or for your spouse, or for yourself.
16:55
SPEAKER_00: Because what I really want people to know is this is a gift for your family relationships, even if your spouse doesn't do it with you.
17:02
SPEAKER_00: And I really had that in mind when I conceptualized it.
17:06
SPEAKER_00: And I have to give credit to the wonderful designer who worked with me, Elena Pompa from Ray of Light Designs from the very beginning.
17:12
SPEAKER_00: And she also helped me with the glow pairing guides.
17:15
SPEAKER_00: So we really thought long and hard.
17:17
SPEAKER_00: We looked at lots of different planners, as I said, to just conceptualize like what's missing out there, what's needed.
17:23
SPEAKER_00: And so when you're thinking about Christmas gifts, a nice way to say this is a gift that's going to give all year long is to find a flow for your relationship.
17:33
SPEAKER_00: And this planner really does that because it starts you in January.
17:38
SPEAKER_00: And by the way, if you're hearing this after January, we did create the monthly calendars where there's a write-in and you can write in whatever month you want to do.
17:46
SPEAKER_00: Perfect.
17:47
SPEAKER_00: Um, I almost didn't even put a January through December flow.
17:50
SPEAKER_00: And then I'm like, no, you know, we're half and half in the Innegram world.
17:53
SPEAKER_00: Some want some flexibility and others need order.
17:57
SPEAKER_00: But even for instance, my husband Wes, as I said, who's a one, when I bought him this amazing planner last Christmas, he couldn't use it because he got into it and then couldn't keep going and it was dated specifically.
18:10
SPEAKER_00: So he's like, I've ruined the planner because I messed it up and I missed days.
18:15
SPEAKER_00: So we also created this as a PDF so that people could reprint whatever months they miss.
18:20
SPEAKER_00: And that was part of why I'm so excited to go through it with my own husband, is because I know that I can reprint if we miss time and we can take it at our own pace.
18:30
SPEAKER_00: So yeah.
18:31
SPEAKER_00: So that said, yeah, I started with January um in self-care so that everybody knows that that's what we're all needing and longing for after we've binged from holiday eating.
18:43
SPEAKER_00: Um, I know I don't know about you, Amy, but I'm gonna be enjoying my food this holiday, you know, there's a little expansion, but no, I'm a foodie all the way.
18:52
SPEAKER_02: I run to eat, plain and simple.
18:56
SPEAKER_00: Yep.
18:57
SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
18:58
SPEAKER_00: So we're starting with the self-care in January.
19:01
SPEAKER_00: I'm the same way, and I know everybody's feeling depleted by then.
19:05
SPEAKER_00: Their checkbooks are feeling depleted, and it's just a time to revive, to refresh.
19:10
SPEAKER_00: I actually start out all my marriage programs.
19:12
SPEAKER_00: I have a lot of family systems programs that I use with my clients, and they all start with this element of refreshment that if you don't put your oxygen mask on first, you just won't be able to problem solve down the road.
19:23
SPEAKER_00: So, January, we take different centers throughout the entire planner where sometimes we take instinct and we say, let's really look long and hard at, as we already talked about, the sexual, the social, and the self-preserving subtypes, but we really do start off with head, heart, and body in January.
19:39
SPEAKER_00: And we take a good week in each of the four weeks of the month, and we take a week for head, a week for heart, a week for body self-care.
19:47
SPEAKER_00: And then the final week is a work on integration.
19:50
SPEAKER_00: And that's a flow we use throughout the whole planner, is we try to balance, as you know, there's so many triads in the Enneagram, right?
19:59
SPEAKER_00: So we take those triads and we just keep on trying to have one week at a time balancing different aspects of the Enneagram triads, and it switches each month.
20:10
SPEAKER_00: So, like I said, January is self-care, but February is romance.
20:14
SPEAKER_00: So that month you're gonna be taking all different triads, and then the last week of the month, you're going to be balancing that out.
20:23
SPEAKER_02: Krista, that is really cool.
20:25
SPEAKER_02: I mean, the intention behind this that there's something every week, like this is not your airy, fairy, fly by night kind of planner.
20:32
SPEAKER_00: This is legit.
20:34
SPEAKER_00: Oh, yes.
20:35
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
20:36
SPEAKER_00: I truly wanted people to feel coached every single week of the year.
20:41
SPEAKER_00: And on top of that, they have the weekly spreadsheet that shows you, yes, you get a monthly calendar too.
20:47
SPEAKER_00: But each week we highlighted evenings and afternoons and then the whole weekend versus how most planners, like I said, highlight the day so that you can be prioritizing relationship time.
20:58
SPEAKER_00: There's a slot every single week is how did I do on my self-care?
21:02
SPEAKER_00: How did I do on my social?
21:03
SPEAKER_00: How did I do on my one-to-one?
21:05
SPEAKER_00: Um, and then how did our date night go?
21:08
SPEAKER_00: Um, and so there's also reflection time at the end of each month.
21:11
SPEAKER_00: Where did we do well?
21:13
SPEAKER_00: Where do we need to keep working?
21:14
SPEAKER_00: Because it's realistic, right?
21:16
SPEAKER_00: Like we said, some months we're like, oh, I didn't do as well.
21:19
SPEAKER_00: And then do we need to do anything further for this?
21:22
SPEAKER_00: So there's a lot of like, we're not just leaving you hanging with, okay, you get one month out of the year to talk about sex and intimacy.
21:29
SPEAKER_00: It's no, you're gonna see a recurring theme.
21:31
SPEAKER_00: And not only that, but there's a monthly lesson that gets detailed each month too.
21:36
SPEAKER_00: So that ideally you and your partner, or you, if you're doing it on your own, are taking a good hour a week every week to just read, to plan, and to get ready for a lot of healthy intention, like you said.
21:49
SPEAKER_00: And I'm really excited about that part.
21:52
SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah, that's just amazing.
21:53
SPEAKER_02: And this is taking it up to the next level and really helping us focus and then get back on track.
22:00
SPEAKER_02: If we're not hitting it or if we forget it or a week goes off, I can see this as something that just encouraging any of my perfectionists out there.
22:07
SPEAKER_02: And perfectionists come in all types and levels of health.
22:12
SPEAKER_02: So, you know, this is where there's a flexibility to it that I think that people should be encouraged.
22:19
SPEAKER_02: And as a seven, I know that that's what we love to build in.
22:22
SPEAKER_02: So I can guarantee you that Krista has built in flexibility so that way you don't feel like if you miss something or you're not hitting at all, that you can just pick up where you left off and keep on going.
22:33
SPEAKER_00: Yes, absolutely.
22:34
SPEAKER_00: And this is a planner you can reprint every single year if you like it.
22:37
SPEAKER_00: If you're like, this is our thing.
22:39
SPEAKER_00: Like we are doing our personal coaching every year because there's, as you know, there's always new angles to look.
22:45
SPEAKER_00: And maybe the first year you glossed over this whole month on goal setting.
22:50
SPEAKER_00: There's another one on finances, there's another one on adventures.
22:53
SPEAKER_00: And it's like now you can really hit that and say, okay, hang on, or we didn't catch the harmonic triads, or what are the harmony groups again?
23:01
SPEAKER_00: Because we have different teachings each month.
23:04
SPEAKER_00: And I just think, okay, there's no rush.
23:06
SPEAKER_00: Take it at your own pace, but don't lose momentum altogether.
23:10
SPEAKER_00: And really, people kind of say, even if they're in coaching with you or I, I'm sure, okay, this is good, but how do I manage this at the same time as this?
23:18
SPEAKER_00: And this planner gives you a one-stop.
23:21
SPEAKER_00: Just here it is.
23:22
SPEAKER_00: You've listed it out.
23:23
SPEAKER_00: You know you're checking in.
23:25
SPEAKER_00: It feels good to say we're doing something about a relationship because that's what everybody wants is to feel like they're working on and both being in the relationship, right?
23:34
SPEAKER_02: Yes, a hundred percent.
23:36
SPEAKER_02: This is so good.
23:37
SPEAKER_02: Okay, Krista, before I have you give us some final tips, where can my friends go find this?
23:43
SPEAKER_02: Because now they're like, all right, shopping cart, here we go.
23:46
SPEAKER_00: Yay.
23:47
SPEAKER_00: Well, they can go to anyagram inmarriage.com and they can use the code Relationship Planner for$10 off.
23:54
SPEAKER_00: Ooh, so exciting.
23:56
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
23:56
SPEAKER_00: That's awesome.
23:57
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
23:58
SPEAKER_00: And it should be less the cost less than the cost of most coaching sessions, even when you print it out.
24:03
SPEAKER_00: And you can print it on your own computer and get a one or one and a half inch binder.
24:08
SPEAKER_00: You can also print it, we learned at staples and get it bound up beautifully.
24:12
SPEAKER_00: It costs a little bit more, but wow, to get it bound at staples and the binder, wow, amazing.
24:18
SPEAKER_00: And now my company, Inne German Marriage, my executive assistant Jen is actually working on getting our binding process going too.
24:25
SPEAKER_00: So, you know, if people are like, hey, can I get it bound?
24:28
SPEAKER_00: But I just want you to know it's a worthy investment in terms of you're gonna use it all year.
24:33
SPEAKER_00: So make sure you get a planner cover for it in terms of making sure you take good care of it because I want you to have it all year.
24:41
SPEAKER_00: I I did say you can use it on your phone only, but I think you get more out of it if you're writing in it and printing it.
24:47
SPEAKER_02: Oh, I am so a pen and paper kind of gal.
24:50
SPEAKER_02: Like I am, you know, like that's gonna be nice to have a template, but I want to physically have some interaction with the content.
24:57
SPEAKER_02: So I'm definitely printing mine.
25:00
unknown: Yes.
25:02
SPEAKER_02: All right, Krista.
25:03
SPEAKER_02: What are your final tips for us as we look to this new year, or we've begun our new year, and whether we're goal setting or just planning, or you know, maybe we even need to overcome some limiting beliefs and what I call stinking thinking as we head into this new year.
25:21
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
25:22
SPEAKER_00: Well, my biggest tip for you is take time because I think that's the number one thing we're all stressed about, and I'm guilty of it myself sometimes, but we're just grabbing at life with both hands and it's exciting and it's blocking us from doing some of our processing because we want to see what's around the corner.
25:45
SPEAKER_00: And I think that taking time looks different for everybody because even if you're not a future thinker, you might be like my husband, a one, and saying, Well, I'm not a future thinker, but I'm going to be on my checklist all day.
25:58
SPEAKER_00: And maybe I'm a nine.
26:00
SPEAKER_00: And even though I'm a past thinker, I'm still kind of scattered with my to-do list.
26:04
SPEAKER_00: So a lot of us are just, like I said, grabbing at life or grabbing at phones.
26:08
SPEAKER_00: And the biggest gift I think you can give yourself is to take time to pause.
26:13
SPEAKER_00: That's been a recurring theme on my podcast this whole season as we're wrapping up, is just the pause and being more intentional with your life to say, wait, what's happening inside of me?
26:24
SPEAKER_00: And what am I worried about?
26:26
SPEAKER_00: Or what am I criticizing myself about, or what is my loss here?
26:30
SPEAKER_00: And there's usually something big that's behind the scenes, and you're typically trying to use a dysfunctional pattern to take care of it.
26:39
SPEAKER_00: If you're just running, like I said.
26:41
SPEAKER_00: And when you stop and you pause and you say, what's really going on here?
26:44
SPEAKER_00: And for some of us, it's going to be our passion, others our fixation for those who are in the Enneagram lingo, um, or just here's my problems, here's my dysfunctions.
26:53
SPEAKER_00: Either way, whatever you're getting at, take that time with God.
26:57
SPEAKER_00: Take some time to get a candle, a pillow, a blanket, um, get a journal out, or just scribble into your computer or phone or talk out loud with God and really address what it is.
27:10
SPEAKER_00: And that is gonna be the biggest gift to you.
27:12
SPEAKER_00: Even if you need to set a timer, say, okay, I'm gonna take a five-minute cat nap because I know I'm gonna fall asleep and then I'm gonna do it.
27:19
SPEAKER_00: Um or I need a snack while I do it, or I need my song that's gonna get me in the mood.
27:24
SPEAKER_00: Whatever it takes, sitting on your hands, get in that space and take that time with God and reflect curiously with love, with compassion, but come out of that with some healthy plans, not plans that are so locked in that you're gonna try to take God over and say, I don't care what you say, God, I'm going my way, but plans that say I'm both surrendering and honoring the flow of life that God has for me and I'm moving ahead with the best that I can do.
27:52
SPEAKER_00: And when you do that, there's just this deep breath that comes.
27:56
SPEAKER_00: And I would encourage people when they're pausing to take a nice deep breath as they do this as well.
28:01
SPEAKER_00: And before they stand up again, just to let that exhale, and now you can go.
28:06
SPEAKER_00: And they're but for the grace of God, go I.
28:08
SPEAKER_00: So now you're in your new moment and you're fresh.
28:11
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that is powerful, Krista.
28:13
SPEAKER_02: What a just a great way to end this year and begin the next.
28:18
SPEAKER_02: And um, just so grateful for you sharing with us today.
28:22
SPEAKER_02: Thank you.
28:22
SPEAKER_02: I'm doing it with you guys.
28:25
SPEAKER_02: Wasn't that so much fun?
28:27
SPEAKER_02: I know I had a good time because I love learning about what other coaches are doing in the Enneagram community.
28:34
SPEAKER_02: I hope that you're gonna get a Glow Relationship Planner to help you strengthen your marriage in this year ahead.
28:41
SPEAKER_02: If you enjoyed this episode, it would mean so much to have you share it with your friends through text, social media, or by leaving a five-star review.
28:49
SPEAKER_02: Your support is the best gift that you can give to me this year.
28:53
SPEAKER_02: And also, guess what?
28:55
SPEAKER_02: Next week is my birthday episode.
28:57
SPEAKER_02: So I invited Marjorie Puff, known as Ennea Planner, to share about her new planner for the Enneagram one.
29:06
SPEAKER_02: She also shares goal setting tips for every single Enneagram type, and we're gonna spend a little time talking about tri types in the Enneagram.
29:15
SPEAKER_02: So until next week, continue to pursue perspective, purpose, and plans for this Advent season.