Latest / DidiLawren / Important Things You NEED To Do Before You Travel Abroad

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Important Things You NEED To Do Before You Travel Abroad · DidiLawren

• 0:09
  Hello and welcome back to another episode of Onset.
• 0:11
  Laurencia, how are you all? Do you know if you're doing
• 0:13
  great? Today's episode is once again
• 0:16
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• 0:28
  Now let us dive into today's episode because it's been a
• 0:31
  challenging couple of days and I must say it's draining.
• 0:36
  A friend of mine contacted me and said they want me to advise
• 0:40
  one of their cousins who wants to jackpot.
• 0:45
  Initially I laughed because I was like, why am I the one
• 0:47
  advising you? Of course, because you should be
• 0:50
  the world's advising your cousin, not me.
• 0:53
  Why am I getting involved in this whole situation?
• 0:56
  Although she was here before me, like a year before me, I can say
• 1:00
  that he we took different parts. Let me put it that way.
• 1:05
  She took our own path. I took my own path.
• 1:08
  But we've been friends since then and she's learned lessons
• 1:14
  the hard way. I've also learned my own
• 1:16
  lessons. You know, we have our own unique
• 1:18
  challenges that we faced over the years, and we've always
• 1:21
  talked about our challenges. We've always talked about, you
• 1:24
  know, our experiences and how we could have done things better if
• 1:30
  we could turn back the hands of time.
• 1:32
  Anyway, one of her cousin wants to travel and she contacted her
• 1:37
  and said, you know, I want to travel.
• 1:39
  This is the situation. I want to do a B&C.
• 1:43
  I would like to come to your place and stay for a couple of,
• 1:46
  you know, until I get myself sorted, basically.
• 1:49
  And she's been advising the cousin to take up some courses
• 1:55
  before coming to a B&C and the cousin has been saying no, no,
• 1:59
  that's all. Once you get there, she's going
• 2:01
  to get things sorted. She's going to do a B&C once.
• 2:04
  Like, she doesn't stress herself in Nigeria.
• 2:07
  She just wants to relax in Nigeria because she knows that
• 2:10
  when she gets here she will be hustling.
• 2:11
  So this lady is basically trying to tell her cousin you do
• 2:17
  nursing or do some mighty courses or, you know, reevaluate
• 2:22
  your life before you travel and discussing is not having it.
• 2:27
  You know, I think once you make up your mind to travel, there is
• 2:31
  that spirit of Jacka. Regardless of anything that
• 2:35
  anybody is telling you, you're not going to listen.
• 2:37
  So when she called me, she told me about it.
• 2:40
  I laughed because I was like your cousin did not listen to
• 2:44
  you. Sing me that your cousin is
• 2:45
  going to listen to. Like I don't understand why am I
• 2:47
  getting involved in this situation.
• 2:49
  But she was really trying hard to explain things to her cousin,
• 2:57
  explain situations or you know how things work.
• 3:01
  But because over there is thinking you are, you are not
• 3:05
  smart. You've not done this.
• 3:07
  You've not done that. So she was trying to kind of
• 3:10
  make me talk to her me that you know she think is more
• 3:13
  successful to explain to the cousins that you know.
• 3:18
  Yeah, this person has done it, but you know, she faced AB&C
• 3:25
  challenges. We also faced all those
• 3:27
  challenges. So it's better for you to do put
• 3:30
  some certain things in place so that you are not going to face
• 3:33
  some of these challenges that we have faced.
• 3:36
  Anyway, she gave me the cousins WhatsApp number and I introduced
• 3:40
  myself. I said your cousin wants me to
• 3:43
  talk to you about a B&C and she was like, yes, you know, her
• 3:47
  cousin told her about me about, you know, what I've done, where
• 3:51
  I am right now and that is where she want to be in the next, you
• 3:55
  know, three years. And I'm like, hold on, hold on a
• 4:00
  minute. What is the visa you're using to
• 4:03
  come into this country? She said.
• 4:05
  That time she's just trying to pay somebody to attach, you
• 4:11
  know, for them to join together. He will pay part of the school
• 4:14
  fees. She will bring parts of the
• 4:15
  school fees and be a dependence on him.
• 4:17
  And, you know, I was like, OK, are you, is this somebody you're
• 4:23
  in a relationship with? Is this somebody that you're
• 4:27
  looking to get married to? She said no, that she's not
• 4:29
  looking to get married to the person.
• 4:31
  He's just for her to. She has part of the money.
• 4:35
  She don't have all the money. That would be like a way to for
• 4:39
  her to just leave Nigeria and start her life over.
• 4:43
  So I was like, OK, you know, the possibility of this working is
• 4:49
  it's actually 5050. You know you can get this, get
• 4:53
  here and your visa is attached to this person unless you get
• 4:59
  here, hits the ground running, changing things, doing ABC.
• 5:04
  So just giving her a general advice on you know, it's
• 5:10
  possible but once you get here you have to have an agreement
• 5:14
  with this person. Like the person will take care
• 5:16
  of themselves. You're going to take care of
• 5:17
  yourself and all the money you're working because I don't
• 5:20
  know the kind of agreement you, the both of you have.
• 5:23
  Because since your visa is dependent on that person and
• 5:27
  that person's visa is dependent on the success of their studies,
• 5:33
  then I don't know the kind of agreements that both of you have
• 5:36
  bought. You guys are tied until you get
• 5:40
  yourself sorted. And you have to, right now,
• 5:43
  start thinking of how you're going to do that in the next
• 5:47
  because it's one year and if that person doesn't pass their
• 5:51
  course, there's a possibility they're not going to get that
• 5:54
  extension that the both of you are hoping.
• 5:57
  And so I was like just trying to get her to understand, you know,
• 6:01
  certain ways she said, oh, how she explained all those things
• 6:04
  to her, that she she talked to somebody.
• 6:07
  The person told her, ohh, she just needs to do a B&C and
• 6:10
  she'll be sorted. She, the way this lady was
• 6:15
  talking, was asked if she was going to come to the UK.
• 6:20
  She's going to, there is no understanding of, OK, you're
• 6:25
  going to get here. The visa is not the end, it's
• 6:30
  just it's just like the beginning, the starting points
• 6:33
  of whatever you're going to get there to do travelling.
• 6:37
  Let me just proceed this week. Travelling abroad is not a
• 6:40
  destination, it's a journey on itself.
• 6:43
  And before you embark on that journey, before you travel long
• 6:47
  distance, let's say you're the driver, you have to make sure
• 6:49
  you have enough fuel. Even if you don't have enough
• 6:52
  fuel that will take you to the end destination.
• 6:56
  You have to have fuel that will take you to the nearest fuel
• 6:59
  filling station where you're going to fill up your tank.
• 7:02
  You have to make sure that you have water, you have your oil
• 7:06
  gauge, you have to check all those things to make sure that
• 7:08
  the car itself is even OK. And then because even if the car
• 7:14
  is OK, even if you don't know these cheques, there are also
• 7:18
  you have to have insurance because you don't know what's
• 7:20
  going to happen on the way you might be driving and something
• 7:23
  will run out of the road and just hit your car.
• 7:25
  So there are so many things you have to put in consideration
• 7:28
  before you do certain things. I think the problem people have
• 7:31
  is they don't see the process, you know, or they see the
• 7:36
  process, but they think that process because you didn't
• 7:39
  follow or you're not smart enough.
• 7:41
  That was why you have to go through that process.
• 7:44
  That can work in Nigeria because in Nigeria somebody can wake up
• 7:49
  and then a friend of theirs goes into the House of Assembly and
• 7:52
  then they give them one contract and tomorrow they go from having
• 7:56
  one 1000 in the account to having 100 million in the
• 7:59
  account. That can happen or you can just
• 8:03
  be working. You see one allergy and they're
• 8:05
  like you be like ohh why are you working on the streets here?
• 8:09
  They're like you who has money buried in his house and
• 8:12
  everything. I don't know what to do with
• 8:13
  money. The person just carry money and
• 8:16
  give you and you become a millionaire.
• 8:18
  He happens it happens in Nigeria.
• 8:21
  But when you're coming to a structural society unless you
• 8:24
  want to go into hush puppy situation.
• 8:28
  So after talking to the cousin, I just called her back.
• 8:33
  And I was like, your cousin is not.
• 8:35
  Sometimes experience is the best teacher.
• 8:39
  Some people don't learn from other people's mistakes or other
• 8:44
  people's challenges. They'll be like, ohh, you
• 8:46
  suffer. I don't want to suffer, you
• 8:48
  know, But you're telling them you have to still go through it,
• 8:53
  but I will guide you. You know, you don't have to do a
• 8:57
  B&C that way. It would be better you come out
• 9:01
  with a better outcome than I did.
• 9:03
  So I just called. I said, listen, just leave your
• 9:05
  cousin. The only thing I will tell you
• 9:07
  is tell her if she's going to go, she should go and stay with
• 9:11
  the person because he's not even in the same city.
• 9:14
  I said once she gets to your house, she will, She's going to
• 9:17
  frustrate because she's going to feel like she's been.
• 9:22
  She's going to rely basically on you.
• 9:24
  And with the mindset that she has, you are going to get
• 9:28
  frustrated and at the end of the day it's going to fracture
• 9:31
  family relationship. So just let your cousin do what
• 9:36
  she wants to do. She said OK, she's going to
• 9:38
  advise the cousin. And after that phone call, I sat
• 9:41
  down and it was funny to me because this was the same person
• 9:47
  that, you know, I understand why she wanted me to advise the
• 9:51
  cousin because that was the same advice I gave to her that she
• 9:54
  did not take. And I guess she was kind of
• 9:58
  feeling some kind of way and she didn't want her cousin to make
• 10:01
  the same mistakes that she made. But some people will not listen.
• 10:07
  In terms of working hard. They were working hard and they
• 10:11
  were making money. But I just, they had no plans.
• 10:15
  It was just about making money. And I realised that yes, you can
• 10:20
  make all this money now, but in the next 10 years, if you're
• 10:27
  still making vast amounts of money, you're you're 20s now,
• 10:31
  but then you're going to be in your 30s.
• 10:33
  Maybe you now have children, you are married, or you have your
• 10:36
  husband, or you have a wife, Like that situation is
• 10:39
  definitely going to get complicated.
• 10:42
  And if you don't have any means to improve your earnings, if you
• 10:49
  only have to increase your hours to earn more money, then there
• 10:53
  is a problem. So I remember I decided to go
• 10:56
  back to school and they were like those that went to school.
• 10:59
  They are all in McDonald's walking.
• 11:02
  What's the point? He's better for me to just do
• 11:04
  all this unification, social work qualification, care
• 11:10
  qualification. They were just doing all this,
• 11:12
  you know, care qualifications, social worker.
• 11:15
  Some of them did. There was one that was working
• 11:17
  in underground. They were, they were good, were
• 11:20
  making money. And somehow when I went back to
• 11:23
  school, we kind of lost contact because I was focusing on my
• 11:28
  focus and they were focusing on their money, you know?
• 11:31
  So that was, I think, where the trajectory changed.
• 11:37
  I graduated, I moved up and we met at a recent event because
• 11:43
  one of us, then mutual friend, got married and we all had to
• 11:47
  attend that event. So almost everybody, then some
• 11:51
  of them went back to Nigeria anyway, but the ones that were
• 11:54
  still there, we attended our events and that wedding and we
• 11:58
  had a round table. We sat down, we talking.
• 12:02
  You could see how most of them were still doing the same job.
• 12:08
  Most of them were still working more hours and they couldn't
• 12:13
  believe I was just hitting their home.
• 12:17
  They couldn't believe all the things I've been doing, you
• 12:20
  know, in my life, how the business.
• 12:22
  I have a YouTube channel about house, You know, I work from
• 12:27
  home. They were looking at me like,
• 12:29
  what jazz did you use? Like what?
• 12:31
  I said no, I didn't. I just had a plan and I followed
• 12:38
  that plan. Money was not the plan.
• 12:41
  My goals was my plan, My fulfilment was my plan, my
• 12:47
  passion was my plan. And everything will fall into
• 12:51
  places. If you chase money, you're going
• 12:55
  to get money, but you're going to get to a point where you get
• 13:00
  to that point, The highest points you can get at that
• 13:02
  level, you're only going to come down.
• 13:05
  But when you chase passion, when you chase a goal, when you have
• 13:10
  an ambition, you can only go up, up, up, because you're always
• 13:16
  going to be trying to improve on whatever you're doing, how to be
• 13:20
  the best at what you do. But when it's all about money,
• 13:23
  you only think about how you're going to make more money.
• 13:26
  And and that's right here, if you're talking about making more
• 13:29
  money, you see people working crazy hours, some people walking
• 13:33
  hundred hours, some people walking eighty.
• 13:36
  I used to work with somebody who did night shifts.
• 13:41
  The night shift finishes 6:00 and then the person sleeps from
• 13:46
  6 to 8, starts at 8:30 like they just locked themselves in.
• 13:53
  The one of the cupboards sleep for like 2 hours 2 1/2 hours and
• 13:58
  then they're back to work. I looked at this man because he
• 14:03
  is married with children. He used to be in Spain and then
• 14:07
  he moved to the UK. It was like, how many years ago
• 14:12
  coming back? So he was literally working
• 14:16
  around the clock to get some money to feed his family.
• 14:21
  Take it. I was like, how is this
• 14:23
  sustainable? How is this sustainable?
• 14:27
  You're working double shift, putting out the work, doing all
• 14:30
  these things. And then in the next 5-6, ten,
• 14:34
  because the time goes quickly, in the next 10 years, you look
• 14:38
  at yourself and you be like, Oh my God, where has the time gone?
• 14:42
  I had a friend who we all came together, you know, he was
• 14:48
  money, money, money, money, money.
• 14:50
  Wherever money is, that is where he you will see him very hard
• 14:54
  working, very enterprising, but all the focus was money.
• 15:02
  He was later I got to talk to him and he said he's been to one
• 15:05
  of these other European countries.
• 15:07
  He didn't work out. So when he came to UK he was
• 15:10
  like it is going to be money. His focus was going to be money.
• 15:14
  I spoke to him recently and he is literally is a confused human
• 15:21
  being because at this point he didn't even know where to start
• 15:24
  from because he did that job, he was working night.
• 15:28
  He did that for over 10 years and now he's trying to now get
• 15:33
  out of it. You know, find the new, you
• 15:36
  know, when you look at all your friends, they are like doing
• 15:39
  different things. Some of them are married, some
• 15:41
  of them are doing well and you just realise that you've been
• 15:45
  stuck in one job for 10 years. I understand that some people
• 15:50
  will be like, oh how that is not even possible.
• 15:53
  If it's me. This is where people fall into
• 15:56
  that trap because you're thinking is not possible.
• 16:00
  It is not only possible, but it is happening.
• 16:05
  If you don't have a plan, if money is your primary focus, you
• 16:10
  are going to easily, easily fall into that trap.
• 16:14
  You see, somebody would be like, OK, why do you want to travel?
• 16:16
  They be like, oh, I just want to, I want to make money.
• 16:19
  You can make money anyway. What is the plan?
• 16:24
  How do you want to make this money?
• 16:26
  What do you have in you know, what plans have you got in
• 16:29
  place? Because you think OK once I
• 16:32
  travel I start working. You calculate pounds in naira be
• 16:36
  like if I'm just making this amount of money per monster
• 16:40
  seats, life is going by. I remember when I was trying to
• 16:47
  save money to get my documents done for like 2 years.
• 16:52
  I did not know whether outside was blue or black.
• 16:59
  That is how two years went by without me.
• 17:03
  Even I had to. Once I get that sorted, I was
• 17:07
  like, OK, let's go back to the original plan.
• 17:10
  My point is, it is very easy to lose yourself when you travel.
• 17:15
  And the best thing anybody can give you, Let's say you want to
• 17:20
  travel and somebody is advising you, somebody who has done it,
• 17:24
  somebody who has been through that road and seen all the
• 17:28
  challenges that is there, is telling you do this, do this, do
• 17:32
  this. You might be thinking, ah,
• 17:34
  you're telling me to go and do nothing for years.
• 17:36
  You want me to stay in this country for another four years.
• 17:39
  That person knows why they're telling you to do that thing.
• 17:43
  You might be thinking once I get there for is it not four years
• 17:47
  by that four years, I've done this, I've done that and you are
• 17:50
  still going to waste that time, you're still going to waste it.
• 17:55
  The only conclusion that I've realised is anybody that wants
• 17:58
  to travel, I don't think they are willing to listen to advice.
• 18:05
  There are some people who would rather travel by ship than to
• 18:09
  actually sit down in Nigeria and do nothing.
• 18:12
  They will travel by ship. They will not be doing house
• 18:15
  gear. They will pay thousands, you
• 18:18
  know, millions of naira, thousands of dollars or
• 18:21
  thousands, 10s of thousands of dollars and pounds to go and do
• 18:25
  house, gay to go and like go. They will not sit down.
• 18:31
  Even if he's going to take you four years, five years to put
• 18:35
  your plan in place before you travel for your own good, for
• 18:39
  your own good, do it poor. You cannot also blame people
• 18:45
  that have an experience. What you have gone through,
• 18:49
  grace is different. I get it.
• 18:52
  But even with that Greece, you still have to work, you still
• 18:55
  have to plan. So everybody that wants to
• 18:58
  jackpot, everybody that wants to travel, it is a very good thing.
• 19:03
  It's a very good plan. But take your time, take your
• 19:07
  time, go through YouTube, just hear people's experiences.
• 19:12
  What I told the lady is even if you don't want to listen to what
• 19:15
  I'm saying, even if you don't want to listen to your sister is
• 19:17
  saying just go on YouTube and type.
• 19:21
  You know, Life in UK, life in Canada, life in Australia,
• 19:28
  Things are done before I travel that way.
• 19:31
  You hear from other people, you hear what they they could have
• 19:35
  done or should have done or would have done if they were
• 19:38
  better informed. So you have that information.
• 19:42
  You can now make your decision. Don't just jump and travel.
• 19:47
  Don't do it. Don't do it though.
• 19:50
  But you know, you can only advise people.
• 19:53
  You cannot tell them how to live their life or what to do.
• 19:57
  People have there. There are some people who have
• 20:00
  chosen to. They would rather suffer than
• 20:04
  make a plan. You know they would.
• 20:06
  What we cannot do doesn't exist. They are.
• 20:09
  Once they fall into that category, there's nothing you
• 20:12
  can tell them because they believe that God will do it,
• 20:15
  even without a plan or merited favour.
• 20:18
  Because some of those people look successful because they are
• 20:21
  working. They're working 100 hours.
• 20:23
  They are working 80 hours. They're working crazy hours
• 20:26
  around the clock. They cannot.
• 20:28
  You see them, you know they're making money.
• 20:31
  They look successful. For 10 years down the line, 10
• 20:37
  years down the line, it's not about speed.
• 20:42
  It's not about speed. It's not about making money,
• 20:47
  because I think the Diaspora has made it easy for you can access
• 20:52
  money once you know what you're doing, once you know how to
• 20:56
  player card rights follow due processes.
• 21:00
  Money will not be the access to money will not be the problem.
• 21:05
  Well, how do you get all those things?
• 21:08
  How do you position yourself to be able to access all these
• 21:12
  things Is what a lot of people, a lot of our people are not
• 21:17
  willing to do because we're used to.
• 21:21
  Cash is king here, Credits is king, and you have to do certain
• 21:28
  things to be able to position yourself to be able to access
• 21:31
  all those things. Anyway, people will not listen
• 21:36
  to me because they'll be like, hi, you've done it now you don't
• 21:40
  want people to do it here. You suffer that we are not going
• 21:43
  to suffer the way you suffered. People that have chosen to
• 21:45
  suffer the that is their right to choose the ones that have
• 21:50
  chosen to do things and plan ahead of time.
• 21:55
  That is also their rights. Even if you look at them and you
• 21:58
  think they're not successful in the listen, I tell people it's
• 22:03
  not about how it's not about now.
• 22:06
  Sit down and watch YouTube. Watch other people's
• 22:09
  experiences. Watch what they have gone
• 22:11
  through, what how they have lived their life.
• 22:14
  Because you don't. You're going to a new place that
• 22:16
  you don't know how things work. So all you need is information.
• 22:21
  Arm yourself with information. Know those skills that they're
• 22:24
  looking for in those places. Try to learn those skills.
• 22:27
  Improve yourself, don't just wake up.
• 22:30
  Ah what is login Nigeria are there's no work and Nigerian
• 22:33
  government is bad. Have you thought about learning?
• 22:37
  Doing some other qualifications that will help you?
• 22:40
  OK, now you're trying to travel. You know that you are not going
• 22:43
  to work with that zoology where you're travelling to.
• 22:46
  You still need qualifications. But this will be like even if
• 22:49
  I'm cleaning, and even if I'm cleaning, if I'm anyone, 1001
• 22:54
  thousand is 1,000,000 per month in Nigeria.
• 22:56
  That is still better. That is not a plan.
• 23:00
  It is not a plan because you are, you've not thought about
• 23:03
  the bills that you're going. You see, The thing is people
• 23:06
  just look at the income and they think that is it.
• 23:11
  That is just because you're going to pay bills, you're going
• 23:13
  to pay rent, you're going to pay everything, you're going to pay.
• 23:16
  And you're going to realise that even that 30,000 you're in
• 23:20
  Nigeria is better than the £1000 that you're in in the UK if you
• 23:26
  actually sit down and do the calculation.
• 23:28
  But people don't want to see all these things anyway.
• 23:32
  Everybody have their choices. I don't want to make this video
• 23:34
  too long. So thank you very much for
• 23:36
  watching today's episode. Please like, like, like and
• 23:38
  share. Thank you very much.
• 23:40
  Bye. Bye.