Latest / Have you met you? / Ep. 15: I Didn’t Win—Here’s What It Taught Me About Success
Transcript
- Sasha Pearl: Hello everyone, welcome to the Have You Met You podcast. I'm Sasha Pearl, the energy architect and I guide soul-led women in building authentic six-figure businesses by aligning their identity, their message and their purpose. So let's get into it. If you haven't already noticed, I got bangs and yes, I'm okay and nothing has burned down. It's okay and we're still figuring it out but you just need to change sometimes, okay? What I actually wanna be talking about today is that I... haven't been winning the things I wanted to win. But it's been a beautiful redirection and amplification in so many other ways. I feel like sometimes that we can really be so dead set on one outcome when in actuality we exist in multiple timelines, with multiple possibilities and multiple outcomes. So how can we focus on what we didn't get and actually focus more on what we're. actually achieving, even if it's not what we started with on the outset of this. For example, I didn't get TEDxBend, which is totally fine. I was actually a lot more sad than I thought I was going to be because I just felt that if I get TEDxBend, then I'm going to be officially a speaker than what I have to say is actually important in the world. And what is actually the insight here is that I was subconsciously seeking external validation to prove that I am worthy of sharing what I have to share with the world. And that is just like not true because I'm inherently worthy. I'm inherently a gift to this world because I'm here. My soul chose to be here in this time, in this life, in this outcome. But also when I think about the TEDx thing, even though I did not get it, I get to go see eight wonderful speakers on stage and root them on for sharing their gifts with the world. It also activated this entire podcast. Like I would not be on this podcast right now, or it wouldn't have been be out in the world if it wasn't for applying for TEDxBand when their question is, you have any speaking engagements? And I'm like, no, but I'm going to start a podcast and here we are. And I didn't know I'd enjoy it so much. I didn't know I was such a yapper to myself, you know? And I'm really excited to start bringing on guests. This is where my gifts lives is in that connection with other. Secondly, I didn't win Dare to Dream. I wasn't any of the top five. I wasn't the winner. And there was no recognition for that either. point of that is to show up, to share what I dream about in the world, where I energetics at the forefront, the foundational level of all corporations, of all businesses, of all interactions. More that we can actually celebrate, understand ourselves. the more that we can have compassion for other people who are not like us. And there's this worldly understanding that we're all uniquely different for the exact reasons that we need to be different, right? So we can all work together and amplify each other's gifts in the world. And thirdly, I signed up for the Dare to Post challenge, and I posted every day for 30 days, it just ended yesterday, to then come and find out that I posted the same motherfucking real twice with two separate hooks. And I'm like, well, no one four days if they catch it and they still select me as winner. I'm sure. But essentially in this challenge, you get entered into a poll to win $100,000 to win or to be considered a winner. You have to post for 30 days, original content, et cetera. The reels have to be at least 10 seconds long. Your carousel has to be at least four images. And I showed up every single day, every single day. And then it was like three days before the do the end. I'm editing this fucking reel and I'm like, swear I have edited this reel multiple times. I swear I have posted this. And I go back to my feed and I see that I did post. I was like, ⁓ great. And then I scroll one more and I'm like, wait, I posted this twice within a three or four day period and didn't even know. Like I re-edited this video twice and just like didn't, just didn't click. So we'll see if I get something from that. But my friend who also did the challenge with me, Lindsay, who was on the podcast a few weeks ago, said that she'd take me out to lunch if I didn't get it with the money that she won. So I'm excited nonetheless. But even if I don't win anything as far as money, even though that was a major motivator and just made it really fun, guys, I went viral. I have almost a million views on this one reel. I've increased my following by almost a thousand new followers. Incredible. I got to experience the visibility of being seen. And when that went viral, it was very clear to me that I am ready to be seen. I'm ready to be heard. And I am ready to fully show up in my highest authenticity, my highest alignment. And I'm really here to finally step into that leadership. And then even posting for 30 days, which I don't really recommend as a projector, a non-energy being. But it was such a good practice to be like, it's so easy to create a reel really quickly, put a voiceover over it to add music to it, whatever, and then launch it into the world. What this really taught me is that not every single piece of content needs to be precious. Not every piece of content needs to go viral. No one is actually seeing most of the content you create, especially when you are new and when you are just growing. So if we can... to have more fun, have more play, it's literally called social media, then that is where the actual wins and the juice lives, right? And so that just really taught me to just show up anyways, even if it's not perfect, just post anyways, even if there's no actual reward on the backend. And if we actually thought about it, hey, I have a gift I wanna share in this world, I have a place where I know I can serve you, if you consistently keep showing up, It is inevitable that it's going to happen for you. And then fourth, another thing I did not get. I went viral on this reel. I got a clarity call and I was like, oh my God, maybe because of the reel. And then found out it was through Google. This person was so stoked to join Big Biz Energy and we hopped on a call, we chatted it out, it sounded really good. Then I get an email a few days later being like, hey, thank you so much for holding the space. I feel safe enough in that I already have everything that I need. to move forward with my new business idea. And I'm like, that's amazing. And also, wow, that didn't come through either. And I'm like, I'm not winning in big ways right now, or it's feeling like something's being redirected or blocked in ways. And not that I know what that is right now, but I am assuming it is redirecting me and opening up more time, more space for bigger things and bigger opportunities to come in. Because at the end of the day, I would absolutely love to be only creating content or building brands for the absolute dream clients that I have. And of course I can layer in the business strategy and the human design and the energetics. I just love helping people feel fully expressed in the world. All I care about, everything that I do, is to get you fully expressed in the world, authentically, in alignment and in true magnetism because that is the point. We did not take one of the biggest risks in our lives. to start a business, to then leave the business we created or to resent it. We created it because we have passion, because we have desire to have impact in the world, to be of service of others, to create the freedom in our lives, to help other people create freedom in their lives. That's why we show up. And so when we look at these things, we have wins, we also have failures. We cannot let our minds rule the show. Our subconscious can make up any story that it wants and it's our decision and choice to accept or reframe it. And so when we can actually reframe, like I could have been like, I didn't win the Dare to Dream challenge, everything is shit. I hate this podcast. I hate et cetera, et cetera. This means I'm a failure. And I could have accepted that as my identity, but what did it do actually instead? I chose to show up anyways. I choose to actually share my gifts. I choose to make my own stage. my own platform and have my own foundation for what I'm sharing because I just know that if I am showing up in my authenticity, in my own alignment, in my highest version of self, then it has to be my path, right? And so as I say these things, building a business is never just rainbows and butterflies. You're going to have crash outs. You're going to have big wins. You're going to be very excited. You might feel stagnant. You get to choose how you show up in your business every single day. So let the anger wash over you. Let the frustration wash over you. Let the bitterness hit you. Let the disappointment happen. Now accept that all parts of you are accepted here. Now it's choice. How do I get to move into, or how do you get to move into satisfaction, success, surprise, peace? And that's your signature state. And that is what we're actually always calling into. How can we keep moving up the ladder? to where we are holding such a frickin' frequency that people cannot ignore us. People are like, what are you on? What are you doing? Love your energy, need more of you in my life, and I wanna give you money for that. That is what we're accessing here when we start actually understanding our own identity, our own roles, our own gifts in the world. And that is what I get to help illuminate for you in these highly potent human sessions. They're 60-minute human design readings. and I am a literal mirror into your purest form of energy. It's literally phenomenal. But the point is that everything is energy and we are in relationship to all of it. So I had a friend actually audio note me today and she's feeling really frustrated with her business. She hasn't had a lot of big wins. She had a win and then some weird thing happened with her accounting thing and it was like $300 off and she's like, come on. And then there's this community aspect that she really wants to build, but it's feeling overwhelmed by all the steps to get it done as a solopreneur. And when I look at this, it's patterns. This keeps showing up for you in a hard way. There's always all of these mental obstacles. So how can you actually call in more ease, more flow, and allow running your business to feel easy? And it's not always going to feel easy, but if you're constantly attracting roadblocks, if you're constantly attracting misaligned people, that has everything to do with the identity you hold, with the stories that you hold within you. As soon as I decided I am open to new possibilities, I am open to making money outside of this one aspect, which is one offering in my business, everything shifted. I just was like, yeah, I'll do that. Yeah, I'll do that. Because I decided to open up my mind to new opportunities that I may not have been thinking about. And I asked Universta, was like, show me the way. Show me what you want me to focus on. Show me where you want my energy to go. Show me. I'm a projector, so invite me in. Have people invite me into their world so I know what I need to do next. I have so many skill sets, so many gifts, right? But what do you want? Because I tried to control the outcome last year of what I was creating. I'm like, I'm only focusing on this course, this big, big energy. Etc, etc, etc, etc. And I was just so focused on that and took away everything that was fun. Everything that made running a business exciting. To now, bringing it all back into my business again. But when I was only focused on one thing and how it wasn't making X, Y, and Z, doing this, whatever, whatever, whatever, it's so hard. But it was hard. I wasn't making a lot of money or the money that I thought I would be making. I was literally forcing it to happen. I'm like, contracted and I was getting more and more better because I'm like this isn't working if this is supposed to work then it should be easy blah blah blah blah blah and at the end of the day it's because I was choosing to make it small I was choosing only this one literal iteration of how this offer could exist in the world and it wasn't working and I was so committed to the end goal that I actually just stopped finding the joy in the actual journey of creating. And of course you get hit with a bunch of sickness, you're gonna get hit with a bunch of no's, you're gonna get hit with lack of money flow because you are literally cutting off money portals to you when you're only focusing on something that is actually not working for your business. And you will absolutely understand what is not working in your business when you look at your not self themes in human design. So to refresh your minds for the manifesting generators and the generators, where in your business are you feeling deeply frustrated? And you can take this through relationships, career, life. Figure out the things that are frustrating to you, write them down, and then move them into satisfaction. Manifestors, where are things causing you anger? We want to get you back into peace. Reflectors, where are you feeling disappointed? We want to move you into surprise. Projectors, where are you feeling bitter? How can we move you back into success? So this new year, opening up all of these new opportunities for myself, because I'm just open. and I'm allowing myself to co-create with the universe. Flow is coming, success is coming, visibility is coming. There is no way I would have gone viral last year with the attitude, with the mindset, with the story that I had. It's the identity work that we can do through human design energetics that really supports us growing into the version that we are meant to be growing into. And that is the beauty of human design. So the core of the message today is let's look. at the quality of our relationship to our businesses, to our career, and to ourselves, and to our relationships. Because the more that you can have a relationship with yourself, compassion, accepting all parts of you, the one, even the shame, the hatred, the guilt, and actually giving yourself acceptance for that, as well as the stuff with the joy, the excitement, et cetera, that is where the true happiness is going to come. That is where your identity starts meeting actions. and creating new habits for you to fully show up in the highest version of yourself. So when we look at our businesses, how can we move ourselves into our signature state? How can we really develop a relationship as if our business was our best friend, not something that was conditioned? What I mean by that is because we created the business, we believe that it owes us something. But we believe that it owes us something without actually nurturing the business itself. So then the not self theme comes in. I'm fucking bitter. Why aren't you working? I've done all this work. Would you talk to your friend like that? Why aren't you doing enough? And it's like, well, you haven't paid me any attention. I haven't even seen an email come from you. And for however long, you're not even showing up. When you have no visibility to even be making sales. No, how can you nurture the business in a way where it's mutually supportive? Right? There's mutual gains here. You have created an entity that is outside of yourself, but it is still part of your world that you created in this lifetime, right? And so we have to nurture the entity, our business entity, with love, with hydration, and just giving it space to fully live and breathe as it needs to, without all of our bullshit stories holding it back, holding us back, because the quality of the relationship with yourself equals the quality of the relationship with your business. So. With that said, I would love for you just to sit with the question, what is my relationship to my business? Where in my business is my not self theme of, on your energy type, manifestors, anger, manifesting generators and generators, frustration, reflectors, dissatisfaction, projectors, bitterness. And then write down where in my business is my signature self showing for manifesting generators and generators, satisfaction. Manifesters, peace, reflectors, surprise, projectors, success. And when you can take yourself through those three questions and write and actually journal and sit with yourself in them, you're going to see where you are not building the relationship with your business. Your business is not outside of you. It is not disconnected from you. It is 100 % part of who you are and what you're here to share with the world. This is your legacy. This is your impact and this is your service. This needs to be taken so seriously because the quality of the work that you are putting out into the world is actually bringing a higher frequency into the world. So if you are bringing products, services, teams that are all operating from the not self, the vibration is coming from force. And so if you go back to the map of consciousness by David R. Hawkins, this is force. This is contraction. You're gonna work really fucking hard to get very little. where if it's actually in alignment and you're coming from your signature state, which is above the 200 of courage and in the 400 range, this is expansion. This is your power. This is where ease and flow happens, right? This is where we want to be creating from. So sit with that. I would love to hear any comments or feedback on that. And again, if you would love support and seeing who you truly are in the world, to see your identity, to even structure how you show up in your businesses. You can book a highly potent human session with me. It's a 60 minute human design reading, or you can look into Big This Energy, and this is where we really set the tone of who you are in your business, the messaging that's going to position you in the world, and the structure that's gonna hold your six figure version of yourself. You are more than fucking capable of anything in this world. So I really hope that you choose you today. And I hope that you love this episode. Okay. Talk to you soon. Bye.