Latest / STOPTIME: Live in the Moment. / Dominique Kelley: Enjoying the Buffet of Life

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Dominique Kelley: Enjoying the Buffet of Life · STOPTIME: Live in the Moment.

• 0:23
  Lisa Hopkins: This is the stop time podcast. I'm your host, Lisa Hopkins, and I'm here to engage you in thought provoking motivational conversations around practicing the art of living in the moment. I'm a certified life coach, and I'm excited to dig deep and offer insights into embracing who we are and where we are at. My next guest has been named one of the most promising and upcoming choreographers of his generation. Black and Blue was his first Broadway tour at age 12, followed by Savion. Glover's bring into noise bringing the funk national tour at 15. At the ripe old age of 16, he co choreographed his first musical named wild woman blues. In Germany, he was contributing choreographer for Broadway's In the Heights hot feet and the wiz at City Center encores directed by Thomas Cale on film, he's choreographed and created movement for films, among others, Disney's The Princess and the Frog, the Smurfs movie, bring it on Fight, fight to the finish television credits include Dancing with the Stars, America's Got Talent, Bar Rescue and Lip Sync Battle. His collaboration with recording artists is vast. And he has worked with Beyonce, Mariah Carey, Janet Jackson, pink, Camilla, Kobe, oh, John Legend, Chris Martin. So so many Queen Latifi goes on, you got to check it out, check out his work. He's worked with some wonderful folks. So that says a lot about him. Welcome, Dominique.
• 1:49
  Dominique Kelley: Thank you for having me. I really appreciate it.
• 1:51
  Lisa Hopkins: It is my distinct pleasure. And I really appreciate it. You're calling in from LA?
• 1:56
  Dominique Kelley: I'm calling in from LA. Yes.
• 1:58
  Lisa Hopkins: Fantastic. Is that your home? Is that where you reside? Yes,
• 2:02
  Dominique Kelley: it's I'll have my 15 year anniversary in January. It's weird to think like, because I consider myself such a like North Eastern guy, you know, to be living in LA. I was like, wow, I've lived here for the majority of my life.
• 2:18
  Lisa Hopkins: Interesting, huh?
• 2:18
  Lisa Hopkins: What brought you out there?
• 2:20
  Dominique Kelley: I originally did. I'm The Wiz at La Jolla.
• 2:24
  Dominique Kelley: And I was just out here and I was like, Well, let me see what it'll be like, you know, living in LA for maybe a month. I'm one of those people that just got here and stayed here and just never went home.
• 2:34
  Lisa Hopkins: I feel like I just have to start by saying that my heart was so full this morning as I watched the 1989 Tony performance of black and blue.
• 2:40
  Lisa Hopkins: Mm hmm. To, to think that you started your career as a child in such a joyous celebration of dance and African American culture and we're exposed to such excellence and being mentored by the Giants.
• 2:57
  Dominique Kelley: I would not have wanted anything else. Like I think that was the best foray into the business for me because I had so many aunties and uncles. I had Omar Edwards, I had Michael Rainey I had Greg Poland, I had Dormeshia Sumbry, I had Jason young, I had Liz Ramos, I had Michelle Cole, I had Diane Walker. I had Henry le Tang, I had Bunny Briggs. I had Linda Hopkins. You know what I mean? Like, I just had so many people who were my aunties and uncles. I had Van Porter I had Michael Flurry I had like keep the MEL Thomas they were award like all these people that if you don't know who they are, look them up, because they are like Broadway royalty. And they they had a great work ethic. So I learned work ethic from Dexter Jones. I learned how to keep my sounds clean and in how to perform by Dormeshia Sumbry Edwards, I learned so many things from all of these people.
• 3:49
  Dominique Kelley: And it was an all black show.
• 3:54
  Dominique Kelley: And then not only that, like, I was wearing tuxes all the time, I was allowed to improvise a good amount of the time, they just let me be a fully fledged human at 12 Going into 13 that I thought I was there was never any like, well, you're just a child. Somebody taught me a step a day. So imagine being on a tour for about a year, year and a half learning around a step a day. Yeah, that vocabulary is monstrous by the time you finish. And, you know, that was just the best first step into the business for me. Yeah,
• 4:26
  Lisa Hopkins: no kidding. Right?
• 4:26
  Lisa Hopkins: Backing up, right? Because you you grew up dancing in a studio, I saw a picture of us photograph. One little black boy amongst all these white girls.
• 4:35
  Dominique Kelley: Yep.
• 4:35
  Dominique Kelley: Connecticut
• 4:37
  Lisa Hopkins: Connecticut?
• 4:39
  Dominique Kelley: Yeah.
• 4:40
  Lisa Hopkins: So how did you how did you end up in black and blue.
• 4:42
  Unknown: There was a performance in Connecticut at some point.
• 4:45
  Unknown: And my mother was like, bring your tap shoes. I was like, I just want to watch the performance. And I believe it was like, butterfly, it was Diane, I think it was Jimmy Slyde and, and of course, Savion they were doing a tap performance. So I brought my shoes. And then at the end, my mother pulled some strings so I can meet them backstage. So I got my shoes signed. And then my mother was like, You should tap for them. And I was like, God, so I put on my shoes and I tapped and Dianne was like, oh, okay, this little boy has feet.
• 5:13
  Unknown: Okay, so then some time passed in because I spoke to Dianne, literally not too long ago about it because I never understood what happened and she was like, yes So then when we were casting from, for black and blue, we were looking for a child that also had technique that time, and who could tap so they knew I was from Connecticut. So they literally literally searched in that area, they searched to figure out where I was. So they literally went all the all through all the dance competitions. And then they called my dance teacher who called pain. And then I went in to audition. And I realized none of the steps I was doing was anything close to any of the steps they were doing. So while watching them rehearse, I remixed some of their steps and added my steps and ended up getting the job.
• 6:00
  Lisa Hopkins: Love it. What a great story. So then moving forward, you got the gig by it sounds like adding your own
• 6:08
  Unknown: Yes, yes, it was being a smart dancer. Because if I sauce.
• 6:12
  Unknown: would have gone in there just doing like rolling shuffles and wings, I don't know if I necessarily would have gotten it. I literally thank God like they were rehearsing something.
• 6:20
  Unknown: So I saw what they were doing.
• 6:20
  Unknown: And I went, Okay, this is when you have to make a choice. And again, by watching a lot of TV, I was good at mimicking and then going and figuring out what it was. So I just basically watched some of their steps literally took their steps ingested, it tried to put my own spin on it, maybe did some pirouettes or toe touch and was like, Is that what you want? You know? Yep.
• 6:43
  Unknown: Luckily, it worked out.
• 6:46
  Lisa Hopkins: You were a choreographer and your mindset, then
• 6:49
  Dominique Kelley: I feel like I always had that brain. I just didn't know what it was called.
• 6:53
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah, no, 100%.
• 6:53
  Lisa Hopkins: Because what you're describing is being able to recognize the essence of something. So it's not so much that you that you stole the step or you were like, oh, but you you understood what was different?
• 7:05
  Dominique Kelley: Yes.
• 7:06
  Lisa Hopkins: And then you you kind of assimilated that into view. And then you delivered it back to them, which is, you know, did a synthesis. I see that. Yeah, I recognize that.
• 7:15
  Lisa Hopkins: Where else in your life? Do you do that?
• 7:17
  Unknown: I do that... Well. I mean, at all times, just being part of a marginalized community. I feel like we all do that. We all do that, at some point, we have to, you know, keep the essence of who we are.
• 7:28
  Unknown: But whether it's code switching, or assimilation, or any of those other things, you have to take the information you're given, synthesize it still remain who you are, but be malleable enough to not only be able to survive, but to thrive in a lot of different situations.
• 7:46
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah, absolutely.
• 7:46
  Lisa Hopkins: And, and again, what's so amazing in your trajectory, is that a you had that I think, God given talent of being able to see, I think that came with you, I came, you know, came with the package. I don't think that you know, and perhaps you've developed it, and you know, learn what it is, and all of that, as you described, which is brilliant. What what is amazing, and really super interesting to me, is that your first it was your first professional experience black and blue, right? Yes, that it was in that context. So that in your formative years, as a person, as a human, as a young boy, as a dancer, as like on every single level, as an African American as a theatre performer, you are in this this beautiful, not really realistic actually World. I mean, it talks about a microcosm of what it could be.
• 8:38
  Unknown: Exactly. And we were in Europe. So that's another thing about formative time because like, it's not so puritanical over there. So you know, the nudity was what it was, we started off in Amsterdam, there were drugs everywhere. It's not that I bought it to do them. But I knew, you know what I mean, that it was a lot more lacks than being in the US. And I think that also helped play a part of it, especially the embracing of the arts and culture. In the appreciation for it. It was just mind blowing it part of the biggest thing was being in Europe at that time.
• 9:13
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah. Oh, for sure. What's so fascinating for me about you is that a you went in kind of unscathed, you went in, in sort of the perfect scenario where you weren't having to deal with all the bullshit of stuff that actually is inherent in this industry.
• 9:28
  Lisa Hopkins: And, and except that you're a guy which yay, yeah, one thing going for you
• 9:34
  Dominique Kelley: Yeah, but also being queer doesn't help.
• 9:36
  Lisa Hopkins: There you go. Yes.
• 9:39
  Dominique Kelley: Like, yeah, it does the balancing act. And then not only that, too, I realized there's nothing like support, family support, friends, support, support at the job support from your bosses support all the way around. I think there was nothing like it because I was raised to think that there wasn't anything I could I could not do. Now as you get older you realize that's partly true and partly not true.
• 10:04
  Dominique Kelley: But at that time, I felt like I could do anything. I could fly I could I could be whomever I want it to be. I could work as hard as I wanted to, or I could relax like I literally was, was raised to be a leader, but sometimes not a leader of people, a leader of yourself. autonomy. And I feel like that was one of the best gifts that my parents gave me.
• 10:28
  Lisa Hopkins: 100%. And you took it, you unwrapped it, and you used it, it's, you know, you didn't put it in your closet.
• 10:35
  Dominique Kelley: Correct
• 10:35
  Lisa Hopkins: So So that's what's that's what's phenomenal.
• 10:37
  Lisa Hopkins: That's what really shines through with you is that, you know, I mean, one might look at your bio and not go any further and go, he's obviously very ambitious. And he had to start in, you know, this way, and so on and so forth. But well, I'm hearing loud and clear, you saying no, I was raised in this way. I was given this first professional experience. And I could have sat back and rested on my laurels, which you could have for a while.
• 10:59
  Dominique Kelley: Yes.
• 11:00
  Lisa Hopkins: And you know, and you would have got probably a lot of the stuff you had just based on basic talent and stuff.
• 11:06
  Dominique Kelley: or not!
• 11:07
  Lisa Hopkins: yeah, but you know what I mean, but you've you've worked, you've, you've worked, you've used, you've appreciated, I hear gratitude, loud and clear,
• 11:14
  Dominique Kelley: All day, all day, because it's never just one person, you realize that nobody makes it anywhere by themselves.
• 11:22
  Dominique Kelley: It just doesn't happen that way.
• 11:22
  Dominique Kelley: You know, and I've realized that even more so as the years have gone on, you know, it takes preparation. And it takes a little, you know, genocide qual like, for example, I never got nervous. If you give me a downed special in a hat, and maybe a curtain. I don't understand how you can not just want to be in the light. I never understood that feeling of people who are like, I want to be in the back.
• 11:46
  Dominique Kelley: For what? For what, why? The light is on the stage, that audience is there. I mean, I had a solo at the end of the show.
• 11:54
  Dominique Kelley: And granted, it was like over three minutes. But I was smiling that whole time because I was living the life I prayed for even as well.
• 12:01
  Lisa Hopkins: Huh. When did you know you wanted to dance?
• 12:05
  Dominique Kelley: Um, my mother told me Okay, so funny story again, because, you know, there's so many times where history starts to get blurry. My mother told me at four, we went to a family reunion, and they were having a little talent show for the family. And she was talking to my father and all of a sudden hertz singing, and was like, Who is that singing? And I was up there with the microphone singing. And then she was like, all of a sudden, then you started dancing. And then they stopped him was like, did you know he could do that? I didn't know he could do that. So then, um, and then going a little bit further. Okay, so nine, nine years old, or? Yeah, nine was my mother was a music teacher at a elementary school. And they brought in a dance company in for an hour. She said I was wrapped. I did not move. Now.
• 12:51
  Dominique Kelley: Meanwhile, I played sports. I was good in school. I went to the museum. I went to space camp, a lot of those other things. But it was something about dance that I did not blink or move I had on like my full outfit and was like, sat still.
• 13:04
  Dominique Kelley: So then I was like, You know what, I want to try this. I want to go to dance school. I realized she put me in around May during recital season. Not a good idea for somebody who's a perfectionist. And I was mad that I didn't know the terms. I didn't know the steps I cry, I was upset. But then she said a couple of months later. So that was May she said in September, I came back to her and was like, Mommy, I think I'm ready. And from then on, she put me in and she was like you never looked back. So I knew it was always in me like I used to love like, I missed the freedom and the joy of being a child. We're no matter where you were you just danced freely in the mall, in the supermarket, in the driveway, any of those other things because you didn't care about the judgment, you didn't care. You just practice you just did what you love. It's just like a whole bunch of people.
• 13:57
  Dominique Kelley: When you're younger, you know how all of us can draw on all of us can paint. And then as you get older, you start to lose those those things. And it's not because you can't do it. It's just because of the judgment and the insecurity that you start to feel.
• 14:09
  Lisa Hopkins: Hmm. So if I'm hearing you correctly, are you saying just to clarify, you're saying that once you actually started on the dance train, officially, that you lost that, that you lost that ability just to dance freely without sort of all the voices in your head telling you,
• 14:25
  Dominique Kelley: I wouldn't say that I lost it. It's just it changed thing, because especially when you think about all of that stuff is just freestyle, like us talking right now is freestyle. You don't know what I'm going to say? I don't know what you're gonna say.
• 14:36
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah.
• 14:37
  Dominique Kelley: But, um, then you have to start honing it, especially as a tap dancer.
• 14:41
  Lisa Hopkins: Yup
• 14:42
  Dominique Kelley: because that is your voice on black and blue.
• 14:44
  Dominique Kelley: That's basically what I was getting out. I was like, Okay, I need to be an artist and learn how to express myself.
• 14:51
  Dominique Kelley: Improvise. And then even some of the other shows I did the same thing happened within all of a sudden you start thinking about it a little bit more and more you start thinking about your vocabulary. You start thinking about what you're actually saying, you start thinking about the sound, you start thinking about what is the surface you start thinking about? How much money am I getting paid to do this? You start thinking about your body, you start thinking about injuries, you start thinking about what people are going to say, and I'm not saying that it's stopped but I'm just saying like those voices get in.
• 15:19
  Dominique Kelley: Naturally. Yeah, naturally, it just is what it is, you know,
• 15:23
  Lisa Hopkins: The price of admission really, isn't it ?
• 15:24
  Dominique Kelley: Pretty much.
• 15:24
  Dominique Kelley: pretty much.
• 15:26
  Lisa Hopkins: So how do you navigate that,
• 15:29
  Dominique Kelley: um, I navigate it by, um, I have a good way of turning them off. i There's a lot of things that I just don't care about or care about the judgment. I think what helps too is that I like to do a lot of different genres of dance. So I'm not basically bound to one language, which is great. I compare it to driving cross country in a car. And if you can leave it on, if you only like one genre of music, you have to keep changing this, this station. But if you like a whole bunch of different things, then it's fine. Whatever is on, you know, so when it comes to like, improvising and being free and being an artist, I do love limitations. Limitations are some of my favorite things. But I think it's because of puzzles, I love puzzles and like brain games, but for the most part, I think that I am fairly able to shut it off and just create and just be in the room and let the Spirit lead, whether it's by myself or not.
• 16:28
  Lisa Hopkins: So you just walk in a different direction.
• 16:31
  Dominique Kelley: Pretty much.
• 16:31
  Dominique Kelley: I'd like to pivot. Yeah, as a dance step, but just in general to be like, Okay, well, what's this? What's over here? What's that? Totally? Oh, wait, exploration?
• 16:41
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah, no, absolutely. It's so funny.
• 16:43
  Lisa Hopkins: Because, for me, when I think about pivot, as you as you well know, I think about in order to pivot well as an actual step, change direction, you have to have a really strong core, you have to have your pivot point.
• 16:54
  Lisa Hopkins: Yes. Which is us, which is human, if you take it to the larger thing, right. So people often think about pivoting I don't like that I'm going somewhere else. That's, that's running actually. But a pivoting to me is your strong and your core, which means you can stretch beyond where you're used to facing. And and it's okay, because you've exercised that and you know, you're able to do that, does that land for you?
• 17:23
  Dominique Kelley: Yeah, sometimes you can pivot to the sunny side of the street. You can pivot away from negativity, you can pivot towards your dreams, you know what I mean? It doesn't necessarily have to mean a bad thing can be a great thing. Like, for example, um, during the pandemic, I was like, Okay, I want to do more musical theater, once everything shut down, I pivoted towards TV. And it's been wonderful, you know, it's just, it's, it's not necessarily a bad thing to pivot. From, no, I think it's absolutely a wonderful thing, because you start to figure out, not only because, you know, in real life, what you're good at.
• 17:56
  Dominique Kelley: And what people want you to do are two different things, or what you want to do and what you're good at, can be completely different things. So I like all of these pivots.
• 18:06
  Dominique Kelley: Because I get to basically paint with all the colors, I get to try all the things I get to go to the buffet of life, and see what I like and see what I don't like and what I'm good at. But all in all, at the end of the day is if I can be purposeful and intentional, and like tried to be encouraging and help other people like an act of service. I think that's that's how I get filled up.
• 18:31
  Lisa Hopkins: I love that I love the buffet of life. If you didn't dance, if you couldn't, for some reason, dance wasn't a thing or whatever. If you didn't do what you did, what would you do?
• 18:39
  Dominique Kelley: I would be I work at the zoo, because that's what I did before I was originally an animal science major. I would do dance therapy.
• 18:44
  Dominique Kelley: That was another thing that I was going to do. I would be a journalist because I love research. And I love like I'm speaking of stories and hearing stories of people that we don't necessarily hear about. And I also have a need for justice. I want to like really, like, you know, get people's stories out there. Um, yeah, I would do massage therapy or PT, I would love to do that. Also, I guess so many different things. There were different things that I would love to do. I love that dance chose me. But I don't necessarily have to stay married to dance. Like the discipline that I learned in dance school has, I can use that in so many different other forms and facets.
• 19:29
  Lisa Hopkins: I saw somewhere that you've been called the diva whisper.
• 19:32
  Dominique Kelley: Yes.
• 19:33
  Lisa Hopkins: Talk to me a bit about that. And your experience with that.
• 19:36
  Dominique Kelley: I call it respectful honesty. I think if you can always lead that way and let people know that you have their best interests at heart because the further up you go, the more people will say like, oh, no, that looks great. You look wonderful. And then you're and you go like, I don't trust you because you're online because I look nuts. I know I look nuts. You know, I look nuts. At the end of the day, people just want a beacon of honesty. Now it doesn't mean you have to be mean you don't have to be biting you don't have to, you know, be very cutting, but they just want somebody that they're going to look to and if they feel like they could have done it better you go yeah, you could do a better. Let's try it one more time. You know, I worked recently with Meryl Streep. I was helping her with the prom and getting in shape and everything with that and she was absolutely wonderful. I mean, I think part of it is She's a triple threat. Who has a theater background? She knows her process. And it was absolutely wonderful to work with her working with Jennifer Holliday. Same thing. You know what I mean? Like it was just very it was like Kismet like kindred spirits with Mariah Carey, the same exact thing. I don't have problems with people that the world deems as divas, I just never really do. I don't know what that is, but I think is coming from a place of respectful honesty. Yeah. And actually just helping people in make corrections, because that's what you're there for. You're not like they wouldn't need you if you didn't correct them. So let's just share and figure out what we're going to do. You know, and it's been wonderful that way, like I was working with Joaquin Phoenix. And it's so nice to have him come in as a student, which also taught me to, whenever I come in, things come in as a student, don't come in trying to prove anything. And I love him because he goes full force, and he really wants to learn, you know, so I think that's why I've been called the diva whisperer.
• 21:24
  Lisa Hopkins: So that these folks that you work with, I'm curious, how did you get involved with that?
• 21:28
  Dominique Kelley: I think it was being in the right place at the right time, honestly, in the name, because by all these things are referrals. And that's what he's talking about connections, being a good person and being with your word and what you do. So it's not necessarily about a skill set all the time. Sometimes it's how you are on an interpersonal level.
• 21:47
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah, no, absolutely. If we were to meet at a cocktail party, what would you tell me? You did? Like, what would you say?
• 21:53
  Dominique Kelley: I would say, Oh, I'm in the entertainment industry.
• 21:56
  Lisa Hopkins: Okay. It's so interesting, if you had to clear out jobs resumes, and you had to say, what values you know, if I said to you like using using your values, using whatever you call some of some of your own values, what do you do?
• 22:12
  Dominique Kelley: I'm an empathetic educator.
• 22:14
  Lisa Hopkins: I love it.
• 22:15
  Dominique Kelley: My mother taught me empathy. an empathetic educator in no matter, whatever I do, that's what I try to be.
• 22:23
  Dominique Kelley: Because you can educate people on how they're supposed to treat you. You can educate people on the inner workings, you can educate people on how to treat other people, you can educate people on their own body and their own source. In essence, you can always be teaching something that people will learn.
• 22:40
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah, yeah. And so I have a big smile on my face, because we're such kindred spirits in that way. And man that came really easy too right?
• 22:49
  Dominique Kelley: Because I love what I do! I know!
• 22:51
  Lisa Hopkins: Indeed.
• 22:51
  Dominique Kelley: Like when you really know that..
• 22:53
  Lisa Hopkins: It's not what you do - it's who you are!
• 22:56
  Dominique Kelley: And I come from a family of teachers.
• 22:58
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah, it's beautiful. What would you say is your definition of living in the moment?
• 23:04
  Dominique Kelley: My definition of living in the moment is being able to fart and then laugh at it.
• 23:11
  Lisa Hopkins: Okay, that's the best answer I've ever had. Why is that? Tell me more. Why is that important?
• 23:18
  Dominique Kelley: It's because it's something that you can't hold in that your body naturally does. So you have no choice but to be present. And then to laugh at it is rejecting the shame is reacting to something that happened in the moment, naturally, in having gleaned from it and learning from it.
• 23:36
  Dominique Kelley: Yep. Yeah, I realized, while we were all on a pause, that was the most present I've ever been in my life. I couldn't think about the past. There was no really thinking about the future. You just literally had to be in the moment. And there was something so wonderfully beautiful about that, that I haven't, that I didn't have to exercise until last year. Yeah, it's something about laughter that also keeps you present.
• 24:05
  Dominique Kelley: It's something about joy that keeps you present. And, you know, if you can connect with what your body's doing, and how you're feeling, and then having fun with that, I think there's no better, better way to operate.
• 24:18
  Lisa Hopkins: So how do you want to be remembered?
• 24:22
  Dominique Kelley: I want to be remembered. That's it. That's it. I don't think I need to put anything on that. I think if I've done my work, and my life's work, and instead of my purpose, that people will just remember.
• 24:38
  Lisa Hopkins: That's beautiful.
• 24:38
  Lisa Hopkins: I love that. I completely hear that. And I appreciate that.
• 24:41
  Lisa Hopkins: Because then it becomes again, not an attached goal to life.
• 24:45
  Dominique Kelley: Yes, yeah.
• 24:47
  Lisa Hopkins: That's you showing up for yourself, for your values for what you've been taught for all the things we've been discussing, and dying and knowing that you did.
• 24:55
  Dominique Kelley: Yes. Simple as that.
• 24:57
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah. Can you finish this phrase? This is kind of fun. Most people think Dominic Kelley is, but the truth is,
• 25:07
  Dominique Kelley: most people think Dominic Kelley is mean.
• 25:09
  Dominique Kelley: But the truth is Dominic Kelley is reserved because he loves very hard and he doesn't want to show all of his cards and then have to bring them all back.
• 25:18
  Dominique Kelley: Because I'm Direct, which a lot of people fear or because I'm quiet in dry, I'm not necessarily excitable people, I've gotten that I'm very mean and intimidating. Yeah. Yeah.
• 25:34
  Dominique Kelley: But again, it's, I have to realize, like, that's not necessarily true for me. No, you know, like it is what it is, I'm not going to necessarily smile more, or change the tone of my voice or like shave or do different things to comfort other people. They just have to talk and realize that's what it is. Hmm. And I think part of it too, is I like to give. And I like to love heart and like, whatever people need. I like to be there for them. So I've realized I've had to almost build a fortification, not to block, but just to make sure that I'm not stepping out or overextending. Because I'm trying to help so many different people, and then you end up drained. Yeah, I think part of it too, is I'm an introvert. And I am basically an extrovert for money. So people see me out and about in the world. It's because I put my extrovert cap on because I need to. That's just what it is. Extroverts are celebrated extroverts are always wanted around. Now, that doesn't mean that I don't have that side. But I love one on one conversations. I love to fill up by myself and do the research and just be and just be quiet.
• 26:59
  Dominique Kelley: You know, there's, there's just and I realized as I've gotten older, it's better to have those self care boundaries. Because then I'm an effective educator when I do have the self care. I don't give so much that I have nothing left. It does a disservice to all parties.
• 27:15
  Lisa Hopkins: So I'm going to say what makes you and I'm going to say a word and it can be rapid fire. It doesn't need to be whichever way you want to play. Well, do you want to play rapid fire or not?
• 27:26
  Dominique Kelley: Let's do rapid fire. Why I've had breakfast. I feel like I'm firing on all cylinders.
• 27:32
  Lisa Hopkins: Okay, perfect. So here we go. What makes you hungry?
• 27:38
  Dominique Kelley: French fries, the smell of French fries.
• 27:40
  Lisa Hopkins: Sad.
• 27:42
  Dominique Kelley: Um, fear.
• 27:46
  Lisa Hopkins: Inspired.
• 27:48
  Dominique Kelley: Farts.
• 27:50
  Lisa Hopkins: Frustrated?
• 27:51
  Dominique Kelley: indecision.
• 27:54
  Lisa Hopkins: Laugh.
• 27:55
  Dominique Kelley: Farts
• 27:57
  Lisa Hopkins: angry,
• 27:59
  Dominique Kelley: indecision.
• 28:01
  Lisa Hopkins: And finally, what makes you grateful?
• 28:04
  Dominique Kelley: Life
• 28:08
  Lisa Hopkins: what are the top three things that have happened so far today?
• 28:13
  Dominique Kelley: I woke up. I watered plants. So anytime you can care for other life that's not yours. You feel a sense of like achievement and purpose.
• 28:21
  Dominique Kelley: And I was great with time. Time management.
• 28:29
  Lisa Hopkins: Is that a thing for you?
• 28:30
  Dominique Kelley: A big thing I love time management. Yeah. Is it hard for you? Or not? At all?
• 28:34
  Dominique Kelley: I don't know if it's because of tap like being in. Yeah, or brain or brain problems. Like I like to be able to go like, okay, it's gonna take me 12 minutes to do this or do that little things like that, like time management is is fun for me.
• 28:50
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah, you know what stands out, though? That's really cool. Which makes you really an interesting human, it really adds to your dimension is that you shared that with me.
• 29:00
  Lisa Hopkins: And yet when I said to you, I bet you're busy. And we should probably wrap it up. You were like, nah, let's just talk.
• 29:06
  Dominique Kelley: Yeah.
• 29:07
  Lisa Hopkins: Did you build that in?
• 29:08
  Dominique Kelley: Yes. Because I don't have things to do until about 1230. My time one o'clock went over, then I wouldn't feel like I was rushed or stressed or less or stress. Yep. That makes it very time oriented. Because I feel like time is also respect.
• 29:25
  Dominique Kelley: Yes. And I like to respect people's time, because I also know time is money. But more importantly, time is love. It's a love language.
• 29:34
  Lisa Hopkins: Mm hmm.
• 29:34
  Lisa Hopkins: Absolutely. What's something you're looking forward to?
• 29:38
  Dominique Kelley: I'm looking forward to the future. I feel like there's nothing better than waking up and being excited for the day or the next day. You can wake up and be like, I can't wait for what this day has to bring, like, you know what I mean? Like, there's certain things because I feel like we all get phone calls that are changed our day for the better.
• 29:58
  Dominique Kelley: We'll get a text that'll do that. Like there's so many different moments throughout the day. Mm hmm. That can make you happy if you if you focus on that. Now. I'm one of those people to like bad things happen. Like don't think it's all daisies and daffodils and cotton candy. You know what I mean? Like bad things happen.
• 30:11
  Dominique Kelley: But there's always some great things that happen. I feel like I get a little agita not in a bad way because I was telling Mandy that my boyfriend and I was like sometimes I get A a stomach situation Where I know something good is coming. You know, some people like there's all the wives tale that if your right palm itches, and you're getting money or any little things, sometimes when I get agita, that means like, something good is about to happen. And I had agita a couple of nights ago. So I'm not going I'm waiting for something good to happen. But you know, it's just part of it waking up every morning Like, I literally wake up before the alarm. I wake up with the sun. I don't drink coffee. I'm just excited to wake up.
• 30:51
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah. If there's one thing you could tell a 12 year old, Dominique, starting out with this career. Now, what would you tell him that maybe he would have liked to have heard?
• 31:02
  Dominique Kelley: you don't necessarily have to wait a year or two, for something to pan out, jump on it now. And I tell myself that like with social media, with everything, I get so overwhelmed, because for somebody who's on a lot of social media, I'm not really, really that extra social. But when it comes to that in other things, I like to wait to see how it's going to go before I jump on board. Sometimes it's okay to jump on board from the beginning. If you feel passionately about it. It's okay. Sometimes it's good to leap, you know, and then figure it out after and again, I'm not one for indecision, but I'm one to sit back in the cut to be like, I don't think this is for me. But I'm going to wait until I'm forced to do it. And then I realized, oh, actually like that. Maybe I should have done that a year or two ago.
• 31:51
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah, no, absolutely. Great insight.
• 31:54
  Lisa Hopkins: Dominique, it has been such a j y speaking with you today. Reall
• 31:56
  Dominique Kelley: You too. It's been great. Best part of the ay. Have a good conversation.
• 32:01
  Lisa Hopkins: Oh, 100%. I love the expression. I get to do this.
• 32:06
  Dominique Kelley: Yes. Yeah.
• 32:08
  Lisa Hopkins: Do you know what I mean? Like, I woke up this morning, so I get to meet somebody new today.
• 32:12
  Dominique Kelley: I love that.
• 32:13
  Lisa Hopkins: Right?
• 32:14
  Dominique Kelley: Yeah, that's one of my favorites.
• 32:15
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah.
• 32:17
  Lisa Hopkins: Yeah. So I am so grateful for getting the opportunity to have this connection with you. I've been speaking today with Dominiq e Kelly. Thanks for listenin. Stay safe and healthy everyo e and remember to live in t e moment.
• 32:34
  Lisa Hopkins: In music stop time is that beautiful moment where the band is suspended and rhythmic unison, supporting the soloist to express their individuality.
• 32:42
  Lisa Hopkins: In the moment, I encourage you to take that time and create your own rhythm. Until next time, I'm Lisa Hopkins. Thanks for listening