Latest / Daily Relationship Tips: Practical Relationship Skills That Help Couples Reconnect / 8 - One Small Thing That Makes Your Partner Feel Loved

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8 - One Small Thing That Makes Your Partner Feel Loved · Daily Relationship Tips: Practical Relationship Skills That Help Couples Reconnect

• 0:00
  A
• 0:00
  client
• 0:01
  told
• 0:01
  me
• 0:01
  something
• 0:02
  once
• 0:02
  that
• 0:02
  I've
• 0:02
  never
• 0:03
  forgotten.
• 0:04
  She
• 0:04
  said,
• 0:05
  I
• 0:06
  came
• 0:06
  home
• 0:06
  from
• 0:06
  the
• 0:07
  worst
• 0:07
  day
• 0:07
  I'd
• 0:08
  had
• 0:08
  in
• 0:08
  months.
• 0:09
  I
• 0:09
  was
• 0:09
  exhausted.
• 0:11
  I
• 0:11
  just
• 0:11
  wanted
• 0:11
  to
• 0:12
  cry.
• 0:13
  And
• 0:13
  when
• 0:14
  I
• 0:14
  walked
• 0:14
  through
• 0:14
  the
• 0:14
  door,
• 0:15
  there
• 0:15
  was
• 0:16
  a
• 0:16
  cup
• 0:16
  of
• 0:16
  tea
• 0:17
  on
• 0:17
  the
• 0:17
  bench
• 0:17
  and
• 0:18
  a
• 0:18
  note
• 0:18
  that
• 0:18
  said,
• 0:19
  I
• 0:20
  thought
• 0:20
  you
• 0:20
  might
• 0:20
  need
• 0:20
  this.
• 0:21
  Just
• 0:22
  that.
• 0:23
  Nothing
• 0:23
  else.
• 0:25
  And
• 0:25
  I
• 0:25
  burst
• 0:25
  into
• 0:26
  tears.
• 0:27
  The
• 0:27
  good
• 0:27
  kind.
• 0:28
  Her
• 0:29
  husband
• 0:29
  hadn't
• 0:29
  known
• 0:30
  about
• 0:30
  her
• 0:30
  bad
• 0:30
  day.
• 0:31
  He'd
• 0:32
  just
• 0:32
  decided
• 0:32
  to
• 0:33
  do
• 0:33
  something
• 0:33
  nice.
• 0:35
  I'm
• 0:35
  Alastair
• 0:36
  Dues
• 0:36
  and
• 0:36
  this
• 0:37
  is
• 0:37
  the
• 0:37
  daily
• 0:37
  relationship
• 0:38
  Tips
• 0:38
  podcast
• 0:39
  where
• 0:40
  I
• 0:40
  share
• 0:40
  simple,
• 0:41
  practical
• 0:41
  tools
• 0:42
  to
• 0:42
  help
• 0:43
  you
• 0:43
  and
• 0:43
  your
• 0:43
  partner
• 0:44
  feel
• 0:44
  close,
• 0:45
  connected
• 0:45
  and
• 0:46
  in
• 0:46
  love
• 0:46
  again,
• 0:47
  one
• 0:47
  small
• 0:48
  habit
• 0:48
  at
• 0:49
  a
• 0:49
  time.
• 0:50
  The
• 0:50
  thing
• 0:51
  nobody
• 0:51
  tells
• 0:51
  you
• 0:51
  about
• 0:52
  feeling
• 0:52
  loved
• 0:52
  in
• 0:53
  a
• 0:53
  long
• 0:53
  term
• 0:53
  relationship
• 0:54
  is
• 0:54
  is
• 0:55
  this.
• 0:56
  The
• 0:56
  grand
• 0:56
  gestures,
• 0:57
  the
• 0:58
  holidays,
• 0:59
  the
• 0:59
  big
• 0:59
  surprises,
• 1:00
  the
• 1:01
  anniversary
• 1:01
  dinners,
• 1:02
  those
• 1:03
  are
• 1:03
  wonderful,
• 1:04
  but
• 1:05
  they're
• 1:05
  not
• 1:05
  what
• 1:05
  makes
• 1:06
  a
• 1:06
  partner
• 1:06
  feel
• 1:07
  consistently
• 1:07
  loved.
• 1:09
  What
• 1:09
  creates
• 1:09
  that
• 1:10
  feeling
• 1:10
  day
• 1:11
  to
• 1:11
  day
• 1:11
  is
• 1:12
  something
• 1:12
  much
• 1:13
  smaller
• 1:14
  and
• 1:14
  much
• 1:14
  more
• 1:15
  ordinary.
• 1:16
  It's
• 1:16
  the
• 1:16
  cup
• 1:16
  of
• 1:17
  tea,
• 1:18
  the
• 1:18
  errand
• 1:18
  done
• 1:19
  without
• 1:19
  being
• 1:19
  asked.
• 1:21
  The
• 1:21
  meal
• 1:21
  made
• 1:21
  when
• 1:22
  your
• 1:22
  partner
• 1:22
  is
• 1:22
  tired.
• 1:23
  The
• 1:24
  small,
• 1:24
  quiet
• 1:25
  acts
• 1:25
  that
• 1:25
  say,
• 1:26
  I
• 1:27
  was
• 1:27
  thinking
• 1:27
  about
• 1:27
  you
• 1:27
  today.
• 1:29
  These
• 1:29
  are
• 1:29
  called
• 1:30
  acts
• 1:30
  of
• 1:30
  care.
• 1:32
  Now,
• 1:32
  doing
• 1:33
  something
• 1:33
  nice
• 1:33
  for
• 1:34
  your
• 1:34
  partner
• 1:34
  doesn't
• 1:35
  need
• 1:35
  to
• 1:35
  cost
• 1:36
  anything
• 1:36
  or
• 1:36
  take
• 1:37
  much
• 1:37
  time.
• 1:38
  That's
• 1:39
  actually
• 1:39
  the
• 1:40
  point
• 1:41
  when
• 1:41
  a
• 1:41
  gesture
• 1:41
  is
• 1:42
  small
• 1:42
  and
• 1:42
  unprompted,
• 1:44
  when
• 1:44
  there's
• 1:44
  no
• 1:44
  occasion
• 1:45
  and
• 1:46
  no
• 1:46
  expectation
• 1:47
  of.
• 1:47
  Of
• 1:47
  anything
• 1:48
  in
• 1:48
  return,
• 1:49
  it
• 1:49
  carries
• 1:49
  a
• 1:50
  particular
• 1:50
  weight.
• 1:51
  It
• 1:52
  says,
• 1:52
  I
• 1:53
  didn't
• 1:53
  have
• 1:53
  to
• 1:53
  do
• 1:54
  this.
• 1:54
  I
• 1:55
  just
• 1:55
  wanted
• 1:55
  to.
• 1:56
  So
• 1:57
  here's
• 1:57
  where
• 1:57
  most
• 1:58
  people
• 1:58
  get
• 1:58
  this
• 1:58
  wrong.
• 1:59
  They
• 2:00
  save
• 2:00
  their
• 2:00
  effort
• 2:00
  for
• 2:01
  the
• 2:01
  big
• 2:01
  moments.
• 2:02
  Birthdays,
• 2:04
  Valentine's
• 2:05
  Day.
• 2:05
  Times
• 2:06
  when
• 2:06
  something
• 2:06
  nice
• 2:07
  is
• 2:07
  essentially
• 2:08
  expected.
• 2:09
  And
• 2:09
  those
• 2:09
  moments
• 2:10
  matter,
• 2:11
  but
• 2:11
  they
• 2:11
  don't
• 2:12
  fill
• 2:12
  the
• 2:12
  gaps
• 2:12
  between
• 2:13
  them.
• 2:14
  It's
• 2:14
  the
• 2:14
  small,
• 2:15
  everyday
• 2:15
  gestures
• 2:16
  that
• 2:16
  keep
• 2:16
  a
• 2:16
  relationship
• 2:17
  feeling
• 2:18
  warm
• 2:18
  in
• 2:18
  the
• 2:19
  ordinary
• 2:19
  weeks.
• 2:20
  So
• 2:21
  here's
• 2:21
  today's
• 2:21
  practice.
• 2:23
  Once
• 2:23
  a
• 2:23
  day,
• 2:24
  just
• 2:24
  once,
• 2:25
  do
• 2:25
  one
• 2:25
  small
• 2:25
  thing
• 2:26
  for
• 2:26
  your
• 2:26
  partner
• 2:26
  that
• 2:27
  you
• 2:27
  know
• 2:27
  will
• 2:27
  make
• 2:27
  their
• 2:28
  day
• 2:28
  a
• 2:28
  little
• 2:28
  easier
• 2:29
  or
• 2:29
  a
• 2:29
  little
• 2:30
  nicer.
• 2:31
  Make
• 2:31
  them
• 2:32
  a
• 2:32
  drink
• 2:32
  when
• 2:32
  they
• 2:32
  get
• 2:33
  home.
• 2:33
  Take
• 2:34
  something
• 2:34
  off
• 2:34
  their
• 2:35
  plate
• 2:35
  without
• 2:35
  being
• 2:36
  asked.
• 2:37
  Cook
• 2:37
  their
• 2:37
  favorite
• 2:38
  meal
• 2:38
  on
• 2:38
  a
• 2:39
  Tuesday
• 2:39
  for
• 2:39
  no
• 2:40
  reason
• 2:40
  at
• 2:40
  all.
• 2:42
  Leave
• 2:42
  a
• 2:42
  note
• 2:42
  somewhere
• 2:43
  they'll
• 2:43
  find
• 2:43
  it.
• 2:44
  The
• 2:44
  specific
• 2:45
  thing
• 2:46
  matters
• 2:46
  less
• 2:46
  than
• 2:47
  the
• 2:47
  intention
• 2:48
  behind
• 2:48
  it.
• 2:49
  You're
• 2:50
  saying
• 2:50
  through
• 2:51
  the
• 2:51
  action.
• 2:52
  I
• 2:52
  thought
• 2:53
  about
• 2:53
  you
• 2:53
  today.
• 2:54
  You're
• 2:54
  on
• 2:55
  my
• 2:55
  mind.
• 2:56
  I
• 2:56
  want
• 2:57
  you
• 2:57
  to
• 2:57
  feel
• 2:57
  cared
• 2:58
  for.
• 2:59
  And
• 2:59
  I've
• 3:00
  seen
• 3:00
  how
• 3:00
  much
• 3:01
  this
• 3:01
  simple
• 3:01
  habit
• 3:02
  can
• 3:02
  shift
• 3:03
  a
• 3:03
  relationship.
• 3:05
  One
• 3:05
  couple
• 3:05
  I
• 3:05
  worked
• 3:06
  with
• 3:06
  had
• 3:06
  gotten
• 3:07
  into
• 3:07
  a
• 3:07
  pattern
• 3:08
  where
• 3:08
  both
• 3:08
  of
• 3:08
  them
• 3:09
  felt
• 3:09
  like
• 3:09
  they
• 3:10
  were
• 3:10
  just
• 3:10
  getting
• 3:10
  through
• 3:10
  the
• 3:11
  week
• 3:11
  together.
• 3:12
  Managing
• 3:12
  the
• 3:13
  house,
• 3:13
  managing
• 3:14
  the
• 3:14
  Kids
• 3:14
  managing
• 3:15
  life.
• 3:16
  Neither
• 3:17
  of
• 3:17
  them
• 3:17
  felt
• 3:17
  particularly
• 3:18
  cared
• 3:18
  for.
• 3:20
  They
• 3:20
  weren't
• 3:20
  unkind.
• 3:22
  They
• 3:22
  were
• 3:22
  just
• 3:23
  busy.
• 3:24
  I
• 3:25
  asked
• 3:25
  them
• 3:25
  each
• 3:25
  to
• 3:26
  do
• 3:26
  one
• 3:26
  small,
• 3:27
  nice
• 3:27
  thing
• 3:27
  for
• 3:27
  the
• 3:28
  other
• 3:28
  every
• 3:29
  day
• 3:29
  for
• 3:29
  two
• 3:30
  weeks.
• 3:31
  Nothing
• 3:31
  big,
• 3:32
  just
• 3:33
  one
• 3:33
  thing.
• 3:34
  By
• 3:34
  the
• 3:34
  end
• 3:35
  of
• 3:35
  the
• 3:35
  two
• 3:35
  weeks,
• 3:36
  she
• 3:36
  told
• 3:36
  me,
• 3:37
  it
• 3:37
  sounds
• 3:38
  so
• 3:38
  simple,
• 3:39
  but
• 3:39
  I
• 3:39
  feel
• 3:40
  like
• 3:40
  we
• 3:40
  like
• 3:40
  each
• 3:41
  other
• 3:41
  again.
• 3:42
  That's
• 3:43
  what
• 3:43
  small
• 3:43
  acts
• 3:43
  of
• 3:44
  care
• 3:44
  do.
• 3:44
  Over
• 3:45
  time,
• 3:46
  they
• 3:46
  rebuild
• 3:47
  the
• 3:47
  feeling
• 3:47
  that
• 3:48
  you're
• 3:48
  not
• 3:48
  just
• 3:48
  co
• 3:48
  managing
• 3:49
  a
• 3:49
  life,
• 3:50
  you're
• 3:50
  actually
• 3:51
  in
• 3:51
  a
• 3:51
  relationship.
• 3:53
  So
• 3:53
  try
• 3:54
  this
• 3:54
  tonight.
• 3:55
  Do
• 3:55
  one
• 3:56
  nice
• 3:56
  thing
• 3:56
  for
• 3:56
  your
• 3:57
  partner.
• 3:57
  Something
• 3:58
  small,
• 3:59
  unprompted,
• 4:00
  and
• 4:01
  with
• 4:01
  no
• 4:01
  strings
• 4:01
  attached.
• 4:03
  Don't
• 4:03
  announce
• 4:03
  it.
• 4:05
  Don't
• 4:05
  wait
• 4:05
  to
• 4:05
  be
• 4:05
  thanked.
• 4:06
  Just
• 4:07
  do
• 4:07
  it.
• 4:07
  Because
• 4:07
  you
• 4:08
  love
• 4:08
  them.
• 4:09
  Because
• 4:09
  here's
• 4:10
  what
• 4:10
  this
• 4:10
  means.
• 4:11
  Long
• 4:11
  term.
• 4:12
  Every
• 4:13
  small
• 4:13
  act
• 4:13
  of
• 4:14
  care
• 4:14
  is
• 4:14
  a
• 4:14
  deposit
• 4:15
  into
• 4:15
  the
• 4:15
  emotional
• 4:16
  life
• 4:16
  of
• 4:16
  your
• 4:16
  relationship.
• 4:18
  Each
• 4:18
  one
• 4:18
  says,
• 4:19
  you
• 4:19
  matter
• 4:19
  to
• 4:20
  me.
• 4:20
  I
• 4:21
  notice
• 4:21
  you.
• 4:21
  I
• 4:22
  want
• 4:22
  you
• 4:22
  to
• 4:22
  feel
• 4:22
  good.
• 4:23
  And
• 4:24
  those
• 4:24
  deposits
• 4:25
  made
• 4:25
  consistently
• 4:26
  over
• 4:26
  months
• 4:27
  and
• 4:27
  years
• 4:28
  build
• 4:28
  something
• 4:28
  that's
• 4:29
  hard
• 4:29
  to
• 4:29
  shake.
• 4:30
  A
• 4:31
  relationship
• 4:31
  where
• 4:32
  both
• 4:32
  people
• 4:32
  feel
• 4:33
  genuinely,
• 4:34
  quietly,
• 4:35
  reliably
• 4:36
  loved.
• 4:37
  It
• 4:37
  doesn't
• 4:38
  take
• 4:38
  much.
• 4:39
  Just
• 4:39
  one
• 4:39
  small
• 4:40
  thing
• 4:40
  today.
• 4:42
  Do
• 4:42
  something
• 4:42
  nice
• 4:43
  for
• 4:43
  your
• 4:43
  partner
• 4:44
  today.
• 4:45
  Something
• 4:45
  small.
• 4:46
  No
• 4:47
  occasion
• 4:47
  needed.
• 4:48
  No
• 4:49
  strings
• 4:49
  attached.
• 4:51
  Notice
• 4:52
  how
• 4:52
  even
• 4:52
  the
• 4:52
  smallest
• 4:53
  gesture
• 4:53
  can
• 4:54
  shift
• 4:54
  the
• 4:54
  mood
• 4:55
  between
• 4:55
  you.
• 4:57
  Now,
• 4:57
  one
• 4:57
  new
• 4:58
  relationship
• 4:58
  habit
• 4:59
  is
• 4:59
  a
• 4:59
  start.
• 5:00
  But
• 5:00
  here's
• 5:01
  what
• 5:01
  might
• 5:01
  make
• 5:02
  the
• 5:02
  biggest
• 5:02
  difference
• 5:03
  for
• 5:03
  your
• 5:03
  relationship
• 5:04
  right
• 5:04
  now.
• 5:05
  There's
• 5:06
  a
• 5:06
  free
• 5:06
  two
• 5:07
  minute
• 5:07
  quiz
• 5:08
  at
• 5:08
  DailyRelationshipTips.com
• 5:10
  that
• 5:11
  shows
• 5:11
  you
• 5:11
  which
• 5:12
  one
• 5:12
  or
• 5:13
  two
• 5:13
  relationship
• 5:14
  habits
• 5:14
  will
• 5:15
  move
• 5:15
  the
• 5:15
  needle
• 5:16
  fastest
• 5:16
  for
• 5:17
  you.
• 5:17
  Take
• 5:18
  just
• 5:18
  two
• 5:18
  minutes
• 5:19
  and
• 5:19
  you'll
• 5:19
  know
• 5:20
  more
• 5:20
  about
• 5:20
  your
• 5:20
  relationship
• 5:21
  than
• 5:21
  most
• 5:22
  couples
• 5:22
  figure
• 5:22
  out
• 5:23
  in
• 5:23
  a
• 5:23
  year.
• 5:24
  And
• 5:24
  while
• 5:25
  you're
• 5:25
  there,
• 5:25
  you'll
• 5:26
  find
• 5:26
  a
• 5:26
  stack
• 5:27
  of
• 5:27
  relationship
• 5:27
  resources
• 5:28
  to
• 5:28
  help
• 5:29
  you
• 5:29
  put
• 5:29
  these
• 5:30
  habits
• 5:30
  into
• 5:30
  practice.
• 5:32
  Everything
• 5:32
  you
• 5:33
  need
• 5:33
  is
• 5:33
  waiting
• 5:34
  there
• 5:34
  for
• 5:34
  you.
• 5:35
  Thanks
• 5:35
  for
• 5:36
  listening
• 5:36
  and
• 5:36
  I'll
• 5:37
  see
• 5:37
  you
• 5:37
  in
• 5:37
  the
• 5:37
  next
• 5:38
  episode.