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Resilience Recovery and Growth (S5) 10:E5 · Inspirations for Your Life

0:23
Well, hey guys, good afternoon.
0:25
It's John C.
0:26
Morley here, Surreal Entrepreneur, coming to you live
0:28
from Encore State University campus.
0:30
First of all, I am on campus, so
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there may be some noise.
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There may be some people roller skating, rollerblading,
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rollerboarding, what have you.
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And there may be some noises around, but
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you know, it's great to be here as
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the weather is hopefully starting to warm up
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a little bit.
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You see, I don't have gloves on today.
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So it's great to be with you.
0:48
This is your very first time with me.
0:51
Well, I want to say thank you.
0:52
If you're coming back, I definitely want to
0:54
say thank you and welcome for coming back.
0:57
We really do appreciate that.
0:58
I appreciate people that enjoy the quality of
1:00
the content that I put on.
1:02
And it is great to be with you.
1:03
And we're going to be moving along to
1:05
other places like coffee shops, restaurants.
1:08
So if you have one in the Northern
1:10
Jersey area and you would us to do
1:12
our show from it, let me know.
1:14
We would love to broadcast from your facility.
1:19
All right, guys, if you're thirsty, if you're
1:21
hungry or what have you, go get something.
1:24
And coming back, I wouldn't want you to
1:25
be famished now, would I?
1:27
Don't forget to check out BelieveMeAchieved.com for
1:30
more of my amazing, of course, inspiring creations.
1:34
We do that 24 hours a day after
1:35
the series five, show 10, episode number five.
1:42
The master topic for the week is own
1:45
your choices, folks.
1:46
Clarity, courage and calmness.
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Today's theme, Wednesday.
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It's all about resilience, recovery and growth.
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Who am I?
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Well, I'm John Seymour.
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I'm a serial entrepreneur, engineer, marketing specialist, video
2:00
producer, coach, keynote speaker, graduate student, lifelong passionate
2:06
learner and yes, pretty soon a graduate student.
2:08
Like I said, we are on a live
2:10
campus here at Montgomery University.
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So you will hear people talking.
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You'll hear people walking.
2:14
You may hear people roller skating.
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That's just kind of what you get when
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you broadcast from a live campus.
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So today I'm diving into resilience, recovery and
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yes, growth.
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So how do you bounce back, recharge and
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turn challenges into momentum?
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I think that's a hard thing for a
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lot of people.
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Sometimes your day feels like it's a million
2:35
miles ahead of you and you're like, I
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just want to stop, but you can't.
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It's like you're on this merry-go-round,
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right?
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But you can't get, you can't get off.
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So the important thing is to just let
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those things drop off you very similar to
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warm or cold water in the shower.
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Just let it roll down your back and
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everything will be okay.
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So resilience and recovery is what we're about
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right now.
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And resilience allows you to bounce back stronger
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and get ahead of the setbacks as they're
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just training grounds, guys.
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Don't get frustrated by that because the more
3:11
frustrated you get, the more, well, the more
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you're going to get off your path.
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Recovery restores energy for progress.
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Pauses aren't weaknesses.
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They're fuel, guys.
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They are fuel.
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So growth comes from learning, not from what
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you would think, which is avoiding failure.
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Mistakes are a roadmap.
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I'd like to think of mistakes as, well,
3:37
kind of part of the journey.
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Avoid forbidden paths, guys, that harm your mental
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health.
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Distractions and shortcuts, well, they just deplete your
3:47
power.
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And I think that's an important thing to
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recognize and understand up front.
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So resilience builds confidence under pressure.
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Stress reveals truly what you can handle.
3:58
Recovery prevents burnout, guys.
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Long-term performance relies on strategic rest.
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Yes, rest is important, not just once, but
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strategically resting.
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Growth compounds when deliberate small daily improvements multiply
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your results.
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Small daily recoveries prevent exhaustion.
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Even five minutes, guys, just five minutes a
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day taking time out.
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Maybe it's walking.
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Maybe it's meditating.
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Maybe it's just taking some deep breaths like
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I told you about the, you know, the,
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basically it was the technique of the, of
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the, I think I gave you the four,
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two, six.
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So you basically inhale for four, hold for
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two, and out for six.
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Doing that a few times is a great
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stress reliever and can definitely get you grounded
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and re-centered.
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Avoid toxic habits, guys.
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They drain resilience and clarity.
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So resilience strengthens problem solving.
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Mental toughness improves decision making.
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And, you know, you can't always change the
5:05
environment around you and you shouldn't try, but
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if something is bothering you or you don't
5:09
like your environment, well, then it's time to
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leave that environment and go somewhere else.
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Recovery maintains clarity.
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Step back to see the bigger picture in
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life.
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Growth flourishes from experience.
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Wisdom accumulates through action and reflection.
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I told you we're on a live campus.
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So right now somebody's backing up a truck.
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Different people are walking around and all kinds
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of things are happening.
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So I'm right now in the little patio
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or courtyard between the student center and the
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graduate building, which is right over here to
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my left, your right, and over to my
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right and your left is the Montgomery University
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student center.
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And then all the way over to my
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far left, right, and your far left would
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actually be the computer science center.
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So yes, avoid shortcuts, ladies and gentlemen, with
6:00
temporary gains.
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They cost long-term progress.
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And I think that's an important thing for
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us to all understand is that the short
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-term, let's say, immediate gratification that you get
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might not be as rewarding as waiting for
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the long-term one.
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Resilience, guys, turns obstacles into opportunities.
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Challenges are your teachers.
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Don't walk away from challenges.
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Challenges are one of the most important things
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that you have in your life to help
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you elevate and escalate to something even better.
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Recovery, replenish, just focus, guys.
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Energy is your competitive advantage.
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Energy is your advantage.
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Everything around us is energy.
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So growth, ladies and gentlemen, requires deliberate effort.
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Discipline beats inspiration.
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Now I know inspiration is great and it's
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a good thing, but if you don't have
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inspiration and you don't have discipline, well, you
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kind of get fizzled out.
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But discipline is key.
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Inspiration gets you to want to have the
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discipline, but if you only have just the
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inspiration, you don't have the discipline, you're going
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to constantly be stopping.
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Maybe starting again, but you're going to be
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stopping a lot.
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But I think that's an important thing.
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So our next point is avoid negative influences.
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Protect your mind and your momentum.
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I don't care whether it's people, there are
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peers around you, whether it's adults, whether it's
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people younger than you, it doesn't really matter.
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Maybe they're a political figure, maybe they're a
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leader, a teacher, doesn't matter what they are.
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Resilience, guys, maintains performance.
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So keep going when others quit because people
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are going to quit.
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And my book that's coming out in just
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less than 60 days, I'm not telling you
7:50
the title yet.
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There's only a chapter or two left to
7:52
finish up on it and then it goes
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to final proofing and then it gets released.
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But what I want to tell you is
7:57
that it talks about what happened in my
7:59
life 10 years ago and how I didn't
8:02
give up, how I kept going.
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But that's all I'm going to share with
8:04
you right now about the book.
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I don't want to let the cat out
8:06
of the bag about the book.
8:07
I'm not even sharing the title about the
8:09
book.
8:10
So yeah, you're going to have to just
8:11
stay tuned.
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But I am going to let you know
8:13
that Jason Academy is in the works and
8:16
Jason Academy will probably be launched very soon,
8:19
well before the book is up.
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And that's going to be the new home
8:22
for Inspirations for Your Life because, you know,
8:24
Inspirations for Your Life really didn't have its
8:26
own home.
8:28
You know, we have the BelieveMeAchieve.com, but
8:29
we really didn't have a place for Inspirations
8:32
for Your Life to live.
8:33
You know, like my tech show has the
8:35
tech site to live at, but Inspirations for
8:37
Your Life didn't have its own place.
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Now it will.
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Recovery creates space for decisions.
8:46
Clarity follows rest.
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Clarity follows rest.
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When you rest, your brain has a chance
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to, let's say, come back to something and
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see it in a different light, maybe get
9:03
a different perspective over what it really is.
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Because when we look at something when we're
9:08
tired, even when we're studying and we're tired,
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we miss the point.
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Not because we're not smart or anything like
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that.
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It's because we have to recognize our brain,
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our body needs a break.
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All right?
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And growth, guys, accelerates with wise reflection.
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Analyze the setbacks in your day so you
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can take actionable insights.
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It's not about pounding yourself on the head.
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It's not about scolding yourself.
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It's about looking where you went and what
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pivots can you make.
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A lot of times it's not changing your
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entire direction.
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It might just be pivoting a little bit
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to the right or a little bit to
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the left.
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All right?
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The next point, guys, is avoid behaviors that
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undermine consistency.
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I think a lot of times, you know,
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we want to be consistent, but for some
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reason we fall short of that goal because
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of the environment, because of people around us,
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because of, yeah, even peer pressure.
10:07
So avoid the behaviors that undermine consistency.
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Small, poor choices will compound.
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Just like big choices will compound, so will
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the small choices compound.
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And I think that's an important thing for
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us to understand and to recognize.
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Resilience strengthens emotional endurance, guys.
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Stability matters under pressure.
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You know, that's probably one of the most
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important times stability matters, is when you have
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pressure, when there's stress.
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You think that you got to respond one
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way quickly because of what somebody's saying to
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you.
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And I want to tell you that you
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have every right to take a break.
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You have every right to get away from
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that situation and give yourself a clear head.
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All right?
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I think a lot of people feel that,
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well, you know, if I do that, that's
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not adult.
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Well, I want to tell you something.
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It is more adult to excuse yourself and
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get away from that situations or walk away
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and analyze them and then come back and
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figure out, well, which way should I be
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going or which way am I supposed to
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be going?
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And that can come by just spending some
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time alone and meditating.
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Maybe a walk in the park does.
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I know that does wonders for me.
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Recovery sustains momentum, guys.
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A paused mind keeps moving forward.
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Okay?
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So when we pause our mind, we have
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a chance to regain our composure, to understand
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what's going on around us.
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Noises, sounds, people, light, right?
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Different temperatures.
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Growth builds character over time.
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Now, persistence is visible in our habits, but
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you know that persistence does not happen overnight,
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guys.
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No, it does not.
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Persistence happens when we show up every single
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day.
12:05
All right?
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This is why I want to tell you
12:07
something.
12:07
I want to tell you it's important to
12:09
avoid the shortcuts that weaken learning.
12:12
Mastery is earned.
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It's not stolen.
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It's not something anybody could take away from
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you.
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And learning doesn't happen just by coming out.
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You got to put some work in, and
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then what happens is it goes in your
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short term, and eventually after doing it long
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enough, it goes to your long-term memory,
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and it becomes a skill that, yes, no
12:34
one can take away from you.
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Resilience allows calm, under-challenged control, and your
12:41
response to external stress is key.
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So maybe you've been in a fire before,
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right?
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And when the fire happens, unfortunately, everyone's stressed.
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Why?
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Because you're being reactive.
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You're not being proactive.
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I can tell you this.
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There have been people that have been in
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fires.
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More people will be in fires.
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If you understand what they are and you
13:04
prepare what to do in a fire, like
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we've talked about this before, like having an
13:10
escape plan, knowing what to do, most importantly,
13:14
not panic.
13:14
You remember the dog in the commercial on
13:16
TV, stop, drop, and roll?
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Well, that's great, okay?
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But there's more to it than just stop,
13:22
drop, and roll, right?
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We've got to have a mindset that actually
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puts us in a position where we're calm,
13:29
where we can respond.
13:30
Let me ask you a question.
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If you're trying to make a decision and
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you're calm, it's very easy, right?
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But what if you've got a million people
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around you asking questions, or you've got all
13:40
this stress or pressures around you?
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Maybe you're planning a party.
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Everything's going fine and that's great, but maybe
13:46
some things are happening like, I don't know,
13:48
the venue just canceled because they had a
13:50
flood, or because they double booked you by
13:52
accident, or because maybe the DJ suddenly can't
13:56
make it there because he got double booked,
13:58
or something else, or maybe something happened to
14:01
him and his team and they can't perform
14:03
for your wedding or your special party.
14:06
When these things happen to us and they
14:08
domino, it starts to build our adrenaline up
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in a negative way.
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That's a stress kind of adrenaline.
14:15
We have adrenaline that's positive, but we also
14:17
have adrenaline that's negative.
14:19
If it builds up in a negative way,
14:22
it's like, oh my gosh, what am I
14:23
supposed to do now?
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I don't know what I'm supposed to do.
14:25
I have no clue.
14:27
When we sit back, when we take a
14:30
breath, we actually can find out that we've
14:34
got more power than we think.
14:37
Recovery restores alignment with the goals and aspirations
14:41
you have, and reflection prevents deviation.
14:46
Reflection is something you should be doing every
14:49
day.
14:49
I do it before I go to sleep
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every night.
14:51
Maybe you want to reflect before you start
14:54
a new project, or maybe when you leave
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one environment to another.
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It could be home to school, school to
15:00
home, or maybe even your office to your
15:04
home.
15:04
Maybe you want to just have that moment
15:06
inside your head, and that can help you
15:09
get on track.
15:10
A lot of people out there, their motus
15:13
is to push buttons and get a reaction
15:16
from you.
15:16
I think I explained one to you the
15:18
other day, I had a client that was
15:19
pushing buttons on me.
15:21
In the past, pushing those buttons would have
15:23
got a rise out of me.
15:25
After the last couple of years, I've realized
15:29
there's no point in getting upset.
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There's no point in trying to win.
15:35
All there is, is the opportunity to basically
15:38
be calm.
15:39
When you're calm, and when you're in the
15:40
moment, other people realize that what they're doing
15:44
is not affecting you.
15:45
It's not doing anything for you.
15:47
Like I said, we are on a live
15:48
campus here at Montgomery State University.
15:50
If you're hearing people walk by, if you're
15:52
hearing people on rollerboards, if you're hearing people
15:55
talk or scream or whatever, again, we're right
15:58
in the thick of the university, right between
16:00
class changes.
16:01
Growth thrives, guys, on repetition.
16:06
Practice compounds skill.
16:08
People say to me, John, how many times
16:09
do I have to practice?
16:11
You need to practice until what you're trying
16:14
to do becomes almost automatic, until it becomes
16:18
a positive habit of yours that just happens
16:22
with just a thought or with just a
16:25
slightest bit of effort.
16:27
Avoid distractions, guys, that stall progress.
16:30
Energy is finite, okay?
16:34
It is your job to guard it.
16:37
It's your job to guard it.
16:39
And it doesn't mean you have to guard
16:41
it in a nasty way.
16:42
When I have people that come on for
16:45
a pre-chat to be on this show
16:47
or my other show, I used to, many
16:49
years ago, just take anybody that comes on,
16:51
and I would find a way.
16:52
Now I'm like, okay, have you watched any
16:55
of our shows?
16:57
Oh, no, I haven't had a chance.
16:59
I understand.
17:01
We take our shows pretty seriously, and we'd
17:04
like to make sure there's an alignment between
17:06
you and our show and our guests.
17:10
And that's what I need you to do
17:12
so we can move forward.
17:13
So I'm going to go ahead and end
17:15
the pre-interview today, but you're welcome to
17:17
come back after you've watched one of our
17:18
shows and figured out where the alignment is
17:21
and how it should connect, all right?
17:23
So resilience, recovery, and growth, guys, together create
17:28
unstoppable momentum.
17:29
Your habits define your trajectory.
17:34
Yeah, they do.
17:35
So practical takeaways to apply today, I think
17:39
is an important thing we should talk about
17:41
now.
17:42
Start by scheduling intentional pauses to recharge.
17:48
You might get up in the morning and
17:50
find that suddenly things are moving too fast.
17:53
That means that you're not being present in
17:55
the moment.
17:57
Okay?
17:58
Present in the moment means that you are
18:00
focused on what you're doing right now.
18:04
If you're hearing noises, again, maybe you need
18:07
to go to a different space.
18:08
Whatever it is, you need to be focusing
18:11
on what those things are right now.
18:13
And now I have people left side, right
18:15
side actually rollerboarding.
18:16
So it's interesting.
18:17
So that's why you're hearing a little bit
18:18
of those rollerblading around me.
18:21
So when we think about an intentional pause,
18:23
an intentional pause is not a punishment.
18:25
An intentional pause is where you decide that
18:29
you want to take time out and maybe
18:32
just unplug and quiet those chattering monkeys in
18:36
your mind, because those chattering monkeys are actually
18:39
churning your thoughts and making you anxious.
18:43
And what happens when you get anxious, you
18:45
get frustrated, you make wrong decisions.
18:47
Like what I told you about that wedding
18:49
venue or that partying venue, right?
18:51
And things happening.
18:52
When those things happen, the most important thing
18:54
to do is to pull away and to
18:57
take a deep breath and come back and
18:58
say, okay, they double booked.
19:00
What other venues can I book at?
19:02
Or the best band we have, there's a
19:05
problem with them.
19:06
So we got to find somebody else.
19:08
Not a big deal.
19:10
And when you approach it in that fashion,
19:13
people are going to be more willing to
19:16
work with you.
19:17
Your attitude is going to be different.
19:20
So again, start by scheduling intentional pauses to
19:25
recharge.
19:25
That could be a five or 10 minute
19:27
pause.
19:27
It could be a walk.
19:28
Maybe when you go to the office, instead
19:31
of you rushing right in, you sit in
19:32
the car for a few minutes, or maybe
19:34
you walk around the parking lot for a
19:36
few minutes.
19:36
You get there a little bit early, maybe
19:40
after or something.
19:42
And doing these things alone will bring you
19:45
closer to your ground itself.
19:49
So now what I want you to do
19:50
guys, I want you to identify one toxic
19:53
habit to eliminate this week.
19:55
What's that toxic habit?
19:57
Maybe you fly off the handle.
20:00
Maybe that happens to you.
20:01
Maybe you're still saying yes to everybody because
20:04
you're trying to be that pleaser.
20:06
You don't need to be that pleaser.
20:08
You don't need to do things that are
20:16
toxic.
20:17
So think about a few things, but identify
20:22
one toxic habit to eliminate this week.
20:25
And stick to it.
20:27
Make it a promise to yourself that you're
20:29
actually going to do this, not just today,
20:31
not just tomorrow, but for the entire seven
20:33
days.
20:35
And I'll tell you something, after seven days
20:36
and you see how your energy is better,
20:37
let's try for another seven days.
20:39
So when people commit to do something for
20:41
a week, a month, a quarter year, they
20:44
don't stick to it.
20:45
But if I say, hey, do something for
20:46
seven days, seven days isn't a lot of
20:48
time.
20:49
And what happens is it becomes part of
20:51
your internal process that you don't mind doing
20:54
it because it's giving you some results.
20:56
Reflect guys on a recent setback and just
20:59
extract one or two actionable lessons.
21:02
So I have one right now, one where
21:04
somebody was not being nice to me.
21:07
I have forgiven the person for what they've
21:10
done.
21:10
Did I forget about it?
21:11
No, but I've forgiven them.
21:13
I've discharged it.
21:15
And the setback was me over many years
21:21
ago thinking that because of their disempowerment, I
21:26
was disempowered.
21:27
And that was an illusion that I had,
21:29
but they made me believe that.
21:32
And then I realized that that was just
21:34
something I was hanging on to.
21:35
It was a method to fit my
21:51
core value.
21:52
One day, a micro goal might be something
21:55
like go somewhere.
21:57
I am going to listen more.
22:00
I'm going to be more calm.
22:02
Track your energy levels, and track your energy
22:06
leaks daily to protect your focus.
22:10
You might say, John, I don't have time
22:12
to do that.
22:13
Well, if you don't have time to plug
22:15
the leaks in your life, you're going to
22:19
stay exactly where you are.
22:20
You might even fall backwards.
22:22
So I say this to you not as
22:24
a punishment, but as something to hopefully open
22:27
your eyes and your mind to say, you
22:28
know what?
22:29
I get what John's saying.
22:31
I have to listen more than I speak.
22:34
I have to be more respectful around.
22:38
I have to start letting myself say no.
22:42
And when I sense people pushing my buttons,
22:44
I need to not yell or argue with
22:46
them.
22:46
I need to distance myself from the situation.
22:49
End the conversation.
22:51
Politely doesn't have to be nasty.
22:53
Just because somebody's trying to abuse or harm
22:59
you mentally does not mean you need to
23:02
be nasty toward them, but it doesn't mean
23:05
you need to protect your energy.
23:07
Your energy is priceless, guys.
23:10
And as I sit here and I just
23:14
look around the campus and I see different
23:15
people walking from one spot to another spot.
23:19
I see people on different skateboards.
23:26
I see some people on their phone walking
23:29
and talking.
23:30
I see other people kind of with their
23:32
heads down.
23:33
I see some people just kind of chilling,
23:36
holding their dinner as they're walking home.
23:38
I see some people sitting on a bench.
23:41
I see some other people sitting at a
23:45
student table here waiting to talk to people
23:48
about some group that they run on campus.
23:52
I see all the buildings around campus just
23:54
kind of very peacefully just sitting on the
23:58
grounds.
24:00
And I also look up and I see
24:01
this wonderful sky.
24:03
Oh, and there's an airplane just off to
24:05
my left or right.
24:06
And as I look around and I just
24:08
kind of see what happens right now.
24:10
I saw somebody on a skateboard.
24:11
I saw them actually fall off the skateboard.
24:14
And I just take notice to all these
24:16
different things around me, people looking at me
24:18
as I'm broadcasting and things like that, saying,
24:20
you know, what's he doing?
24:21
But I think these are important things.
24:24
Awareness is a big component of my book.
24:26
And when you get my book, you definitely
24:28
will see why I've talked about awareness, but
24:30
awareness becomes a key component to our success
24:35
in life.
24:36
Everyone has the ability to notice awareness, but
24:39
they don't because either they're afraid, they think
24:45
it's going to be something different, right?
24:49
I think the reason people don't embrace awareness
24:54
is because they're scared.
24:58
It may be different.
25:00
It might be harder.
25:01
It might change the person to whom you
25:06
are right now.
25:08
And again, looking around campus and just seeing
25:10
more people walking as we're getting close to
25:13
another class time starting soon and just seeing
25:15
people walking and just noticing the pace.
25:18
Most people are walking across campus very leisurely,
25:23
very casually, not really running to go anywhere.
25:27
I see another group of friends sitting at
25:28
a table over there, just kind of having
25:31
something to eat and talking with some of
25:33
their friends.
25:34
And I think that's the important thing to
25:36
notice.
25:37
Everyone that I'm noticing on campus, everyone on
25:39
campus is moving very slowly.
25:43
And I think that's another great thing about
25:45
college is when you're walking around campus, okay,
25:49
you get a chance to be part of
25:52
the environment.
25:55
And, you know, when people say, oh, gee,
25:56
you know, I'm going to school.
25:57
And I had forgotten this because when I
25:58
was at college, when I was in my
26:00
undergrads, there was an environment, but I didn't
26:05
realize like what the environment really meant because
26:10
I was always busy rushing to class.
26:11
But now I'm starting to appreciate what an
26:14
environment is and how we take, let's say,
26:18
time to appreciate and enjoy it.
26:20
Right now, I'm actually hearing people laughing.
26:23
I'm hearing some chimes from, I think there's
26:25
a bell clock tower at one of the
26:27
buildings here.
26:28
And just noticing these things is a very,
26:32
you know, interesting thing.
26:34
And right now it's donging.
26:36
That's going to dong four times because it's
26:38
actually just right about four o'clock.
26:40
And so when we think about all this
26:41
stuff and we think about, you know, people
26:46
walking around and we think about the speed
26:48
and we saw there's a bird just flying
26:50
right now, the bird just kind of, and
26:51
he's flying up to one of the tops
26:53
of the lights here in the patio courtyard
26:58
area.
26:59
And just noticing that and maybe noticing different
27:03
colors around.
27:05
Okay.
27:07
I want to let you guys know that
27:09
resilience and recovery is not a myth.
27:12
You can do it if you really want
27:14
to.
27:16
Remember guys, resilience, recovery, and growth are deliberate
27:20
choices that you make daily.
27:23
Build them into your routine and your life
27:25
transforms.
27:27
Exclude them and you either stay stagnant or
27:32
you go backwards.
27:34
That choice is up to you guys.
27:36
I invite you to catch all my episodes
27:38
of Inspirations for Your Life at believemeachieve.com.
27:43
You can get my short form content, my
27:45
long form content, articles, reels, and so much
27:51
more.
27:52
I hope you guys have a great rest
27:54
of your day or evening.
27:56
And remember, check out believemeachieve.com and we'll
28:00
help you become a better version of yourself.
28:02
Have a great one, everyone.
28:04
Be well.