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Mother/Son Relationships · Black Girl Interrupted Podcast

• 0:02
  All right, Welcome to another episode a Black Girl Interrupted. Y'all already know
• 0:09
  who it is. Y'all know I don't need to keep introducing myself, but
• 0:12
  of course y'all know what's your girl? Ashley and joining me? Fun,
• 0:18
  Paige? You coldly? What's up? Everyone? I'm doing good. You're
• 0:26
  ready, You're excited, You're nervous. How you're feeling tonight? I'm all
• 0:31
  good? Really, you're ready. You're ready for us to get on this
• 0:38
  journey and traveling our road to healing and forgiveness. Yeah, I'm happy for
• 0:48
  you, I'm proud, I'm excited. But before we go any further,
• 0:54
  y'all know what I gotta do. Welcome to Black Girl Interrupted. We like
• 0:59
  to see that we are the new go to conversation on all things concerning the
• 1:04
  black woman experience, whether it's wellness, self love, self care, or
• 1:10
  empowering one another. Black Girl Interrupted will interrupt that daily grimes uplift, change
• 1:15
  and empower women of color to a whole new level. Don't forget to join
• 1:21
  us each and every Tuesday night, a pm Central Time, nine pm Eastern
• 1:26
  Time for all brand new episodes. All right, what are you doing?
• 1:49
  What are you doing? How are you feeling today? How have you been
• 1:53
  feeling this week so far? At first, it was you know, stressed
• 2:01
  because this whole not stress, anxious because this whole election, and you know,
• 2:07
  everyone wants to know, like who who, Who's gonna be our next
• 2:09
  president? And you know we are here waiting for his best to be counted
• 2:13
  in. And you know, I've never been like so invested into politics like
• 2:16
  I was now so, but I mean, this is our future we're talking
• 2:21
  about, so I had to be invested, so I know, right like
• 2:27
  I've been a way this whole week like I've been. Hold on, we
• 2:30
  have a comment that just came in. Hold on, we have a comment.
• 2:35
  Hey, Anthony, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank
• 2:38
  you so much. I know, y'all see my men and me, he
• 2:43
  doesn't feel like he looks like his mother, but unfortunately he does. You
• 2:46
  know, he looks just like his mother. Let's see. Let me take
• 2:51
  this lass. Y'all know, I can't see without these lasts, but he's
• 2:58
  not. He's all all all mine. So tonight's episode, I had to
• 3:01
  put my look us back on because I'm blind, y'all, I can't see.
• 3:06
  So tonight's episode, I know, I said, a couple of weeks
• 3:09
  ago, we were just gonna wrap up relationships, but this one here,
• 3:15
  my son suggested. You know that we discussed my mother's son relationships simply because
• 3:23
  our relationship is broken and we are on the road to healing as well,
• 3:30
  on the road to forgiveness. So it's a long time coming. There are
• 3:39
  some things that I know my son doesn't understand, and tonight I'm here to
• 3:45
  provide clarity for him so he could go home and take that wall down that
• 3:51
  he's built to block me from his heart. Because I my son was my
• 3:57
  best friend. You know he's still is. You know, he's been my
• 4:00
  rock through everything, through my ups, my downs, my highs, my
• 4:04
  lows. My son has always been there. So we're just gonna jump right
• 4:11
  on it. The son. So let's go here. Mother son relationships.
• 4:18
  So you tell me, give me your let me ask you this. Give
• 4:24
  me your definition of a mother son relationship. Well there's there's not really a
• 4:30
  clear definition, but it just it depends on the person really. But how
• 4:35
  I see it is h a mother son relationship is you know, obvio see
• 4:41
  a good relationship between a mother and son where they're able to you know,
• 4:45
  connect with each other, and you know, you know, I have that
• 4:48
  bond with each other, you know, and you'll be able to, you
• 4:51
  know, talk to each other about certain things, and you'll be able to
• 4:56
  open up with certain things. And I agree with you on that. I
• 5:00
  mean you you're my oldest son, You're the oldest and I think I told
• 5:05
  you this before that I asked the God, whenever he's thoughtful for me to
• 5:11
  have children, give me a boy. Let my first child be a boy.
• 5:15
  And that's exactly what he blessed me with. But you were seen long
• 5:18
  before you got here, you know, before Mamadar has passed away. She
• 5:23
  kept saying. It was a little boy playing under her bed. She said,
• 5:26
  this little boy with all this there, he just plays with me here
• 5:30
  and he just smiles. And you know it, at the time I wasn't
• 5:32
  pregnant. But I really honestly believe that Mamadarras gave you to me for a
• 5:38
  reason. I promise I'm not gonna get emotional to night, y'all. Y'all
• 5:44
  know I'm I'm an emotional person. But when it comes to my children and
• 5:47
  me trying to rebuild the bomb with my children, I have to I have
• 5:51
  to deal with a lot of things that they say to me that I know
• 5:56
  it's gonna hurt, but that's the only way we're gonna be able to heat.
• 6:00
  And so just to kind of pick it back off of what you were
• 6:02
  saying, mother son relationship is exactly what you're saying. A mother is supposed
• 6:09
  to be there for her son at all times. You know, I'm supposed
• 6:14
  to be your comfort zone. You know, You're supposed to be able to
• 6:18
  stay down and talk to me and get the love and the nurturing that you
• 6:23
  know you deserve. You know, that's definitely a mother son relationship. You
• 6:29
  know, Oh, Anthony say it's okay to get emotional. Showing emotions and
• 6:38
  feelings as good for us to understand. And it is. This tonight means
• 6:49
  the world to me because I'm on the road to recovery and healing with my
• 6:57
  daughter and now my son. Absolutely. T Sha says obedient. She says
• 7:08
  transparency. Absolutely, And that's and that's exactly how I want to be with
• 7:14
  my children's to be very transparent. I no longer want to hold things back
• 7:19
  from my children. I want to be a better mother, you know,
• 7:26
  that's that's definitely my goal. Is is to be a better mother. You
• 7:30
  know, Yes, my children are now nineteen and seventeen, but I don't
• 7:33
  ever feel like it's ever too late to repair a broken relationship. T Sha
• 7:42
  say, It's a process, absolutely, and I'm actually and I'm ready,
• 7:46
  you know, baby steps. You know, Yes, when I came back
• 7:49
  to Houston, I was expecting things to go back to the way they were.
• 7:54
  But I had to realize that my children were older, you know,
• 8:01
  they had developed their own personalities, so I had to relearn them. Not
• 8:07
  only did they have to learn relearn me, but I had to relearn my
• 8:11
  children. So I'm actually excited about the process. You know, I'm very
• 8:18
  excited. I'm very excited, very baby steps. You know, I'm not
• 8:24
  expecting my children just to automatically love, you know, love and respect me
• 8:30
  today because I know it's a process, you know, I know it doesn't
• 8:35
  happen overnight, and I'm willing to work and put in the work and do
• 8:39
  whatever I need to do to compare and rebuild the relationship with my children.
• 8:45
  You know, my children are everything to me. They are you know,
• 8:48
  they've they've been the light for me, you know, outside of God,
• 8:52
  my children have been my life. You know, They've been a lot of
• 8:56
  the reasons why I've kept going and doing a lot of things that I do
• 9:00
  as far as changing, you know. So I'm excited. You know.
• 9:05
  I'm glad that you joined me tonight. I'm glad that you have decided to
• 9:13
  open your heart and let that wall down. Oh you got another comment for
• 9:20
  you? What's up? Man? Yeah? Oh? They rolling in pop
• 9:37
  athon. You say it's a journey as long as each party is willing to
• 9:39
  walk with you. Absolutely, absolutely, so I definitely agree with that.
• 9:46
  You know this. I'm excited to be on it. I'm excited to be
• 9:52
  back with my children. I'm glad that they've accepted me back, you know.
• 9:58
  But to you, your Corey, because you you you you're the toughest
• 10:03
  one out of the three. You're the strongest one. So I want to
• 10:11
  say thank you to allow one that door to open and allow me to come
• 10:16
  into that door to rebuild this relationship. Both they're gonna keys Casis. That's
• 10:30
  Tara Artist for for a wife. Oh yes, by the way, before
• 10:33
  we even going in further, I have dream on tonight, So don't forget
• 10:39
  to go get colored peach favor and I will drop the link in the in
• 10:45
  the y'all know why I'm the link it, but I post every day,
• 10:48
  y'all, share, like, subscribe, don't forget to join us on Keisha's
• 10:52
  gonna every Friday night eight thirty pm Central Time, seventh thirty No eight thirty
• 10:58
  people from East time, seven thirty pm Central Time, where we high like
• 11:03
  black on black feamale entrepreneurs mixed with a little girl talk currently fest y'all know
• 11:07
  we're talking about everything on the owner. Absolutely, the children, absolutely,
• 11:13
  they do belong to guide Glory. Amen. I go, girl, I'm
• 11:28
  gonna get the times together through. Okay, but don't forget, y'all,
• 11:31
  and not only corner like, share, subscribe. She is on YouTube,
• 11:37
  She's on Instagram, She's on Twitter, She's on Facebook. Uh. She
• 11:43
  all on Piecia's corner is everywhere. Colors by kish Balla on Instagram. Uh
• 11:50
  girl, Facebook, go to her website, get some lipstick. She got
• 11:56
  some bomb colors. As you could see, I got drink all the night
• 11:58
  and unfortunate all the classes that I had another night. Is so that oh
• 12:07
  for you? Absolutely so oh so. I know I'm gonna embarrass you for
• 12:16
  just a moment, son, I have to just for a brief second.
• 12:22
  But it ain't too bad. But let me tell you, I remember that
• 12:30
  day so vividly. That was Valentine's Day, and Granny bought you your first
• 12:39
  supper. And that's me and you, my baby, my firstborn. I'm
• 13:00
  so starry. I'm so sorry that I hurt. I'm really truly sorry.
• 13:16
  I'm so sorry that I did not put your first and that I only thought
• 13:24
  about me. I'm so sorry that I wasn't fair when you're needed me.
• 13:41
  I take accountability for that. I take accountability for the pain that I've caused
• 13:48
  you. But when me and your said, daddy, we had our conversation.
• 13:56
  You know, like I told you, I didn't even love myself,
• 14:07
  so I didn't know how to love my children. I didn't know and I
• 14:16
  could be a woman in them that I wanted to party, I wanted to
• 14:22
  club, I wanted to do Actually it wasn't you know. I will say
• 14:28
  that, I won't say that I didn't love you. I didn't know how
• 14:31
  to proper enough you because I was too busy loving me and wanted to do
• 14:43
  me. I wanted to be a mom. But after that, the fact,
• 14:50
  in the beginning, I didn't I didn't want to be a mom.
• 14:58
  So when I look at these yours, so much paint hid behind. That's
• 15:05
  my so much pain, a lot of hurt, a lot of trauma.
• 15:22
  But when I had you, that was absolutely the happiest day in my life.
• 15:31
  I want you to always know that I don't regret you. I know
• 15:35
  I've told you that. I know I've said that to you. I know
• 15:41
  I've told you I hated you. I know i've told you that I wish
• 15:45
  I had an abortion. But that was anger, that was hurt, that
• 15:48
  was pain that you didn't deserve. What was pain you didn't deserve because that
• 15:58
  was my ain't not your. Hey, Braddy's h h hurt you. And
• 16:32
  I know you hated me, and you had ever write to thank you.
• 16:38
  Anthony M M Bradness, Hey, girl, I know you hated me.
• 17:03
  I think you're tolerating me sometimes. But I've always loved you. I have
• 17:21
  you are my baby. Thank you Anthony. Oh table oh, but I
• 17:51
  know I know you did. When I was in Atlanta, I want to
• 18:02
  draw with me, but I wasn't stable. When I went to jail,
• 18:17
  y'all were just about to come and stay with you. I went and bought
• 18:21
  your bump bess. You remember that, yeah, up there in Atlanta again.
• 18:25
  Well it was well, they weren't, but I had separated them if
• 18:30
  they were bump beds. But I had separated them because I didn't feel comfortable
• 18:34
  with you know, y'all being on you know you and Mary being on top.
• 18:41
  I got arrested and your grandmother said, Ashley, you know, leave
• 18:45
  them here until we see what the outcome is gonna be. And it hurt
• 18:52
  me. I wanted to die. I took the suicide, but I left,
• 19:15
  y'all. I won't say that I left, y'all. I left the
• 19:23
  situation. I've always wanted my children with me no matter where I went,
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  but it was unfair to y'all for me to drag y'all all over the place.
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  And I was a stable. It was a stable. Oh, thank
• 19:51
  you Brandis. I met her when I lived in Atlanta, jaral Or.
• 20:00
  Let's say we are human. Nobody is perfect. I know I'm not both,
• 20:08
  but I want to be better than what I was yesterday. Every day
• 20:14
  I wake up. Oh, thank you, James. Oh, I appreciate
• 20:25
  that. Thank you for being my friend. Hey, big brother, say
• 20:34
  absolutely much love to you and your daughter and your wife and your children.
• 20:47
  Brenda says, I sure did. We definitely we all mess up and it
• 20:52
  step taking its progress, absolutely, and that's my goal. But the one
• 20:57
  is to have a better relationship with all three of my children, you know.
• 21:07
  So going back, let me ask you is your definition, and I'll
• 21:18
  get back to I'll get back to my story. But I want to know
• 21:22
  in your opinion. I want to hear from you tonight. What's the healthy
• 21:27
  mother son relationship? A healthy relationship you know between a mother and son is
• 21:36
  you know, definitely the respect you know from from both people obviously, and
• 21:41
  uh yeah, being able to you know, talk to one another, you
• 21:48
  know about certain situations you know, uh yeah, well yeah, for me,
• 21:56
  that pretty much sums it up. You know, definitely the respect between
• 22:00
  y'all and you know, being understanding towards one another, and you know,
• 22:06
  be able to sit down and just have a civil conversation. So let me
• 22:14
  ask you this. Do you think our relationship is healthy? No? Definitely?
• 22:26
  Why Why do you think our relationship is not healthy? From right now
• 22:33
  or for like in the pastor what from then to now? I mean going
• 22:41
  back again, hold on, you have a you have a question. Oops
• 22:56
  your perspective of a healthy mother son relationship. Yes, you know, like
• 23:04
  I said before, it's definitely you know, the lower respect towards one another,
• 23:08
  you know, being understanding and definitely a lot of trust with each other.
• 23:15
  Patience, Yeah, patience too, And I think that's both sides.
• 23:22
  We definitely have to have patience on both sides. You know. You know,
• 23:27
  being a parent, you know, as I've stated before, doesn't come
• 23:33
  with a manual. You know, there's not a book that tells you how
• 23:37
  to be a perfect parent, so everybody kind of learns. And I think
• 23:48
  a healthy mother son relationship is definitely love. Security. You know, you
• 24:02
  want to be able to feel secure when you're with me. You know,
• 24:04
  you want to make sure that I'm protecting you, you know, Anthony say,
• 24:15
  oh poor Anthony, trust and believe. When I first launched catch All,
• 24:27
  I was very nervous. I was like, how can I be so
• 24:30
  open and vulnerable? Vulnerable when people I don't know? But I say,
• 24:36
  you know, I could possibly help somebody else. So here we are.
• 24:41
  This is my personal journey. Oh my big sis list. As you're very
• 24:48
  intelligent, Jr. Cory, I mean they just comes, you know,
• 24:56
  observing everything and you know, just learning from other people, and some people
• 25:03
  like say that, I'm like, why is in my young age? But
• 25:10
  I just I just like prefer to think things a lot more logical than like
• 25:14
  act out on emotions. And you definitely do that. So Sam says,
• 25:19
  communication and understanding have to be the foundation. Absolutely. Anthony says, trust
• 25:32
  and understanding as well as knowing that you have each other's best interests and love.
• 25:37
  Love is the key and the doorway is the heart. Amen to that
• 25:42
  one. Oh, I got you say, that's why I'm here. So
• 25:56
  my Grandpeter says, to make the relationship better, you have to forgive each
• 26:00
  other for the past and move forward to a healthy relationship, which is exactly
• 26:07
  why we're here tonight, is to address the past, heal the past,
• 26:14
  to move on to a healthy relationship in the future. Because what I don't
• 26:18
  want this to have. I don't want my children to carry this on to
• 26:22
  their children, you know, I don't want them to carry this on.
• 26:26
  It has to stop somewhere, So it has to be with my children.
• 26:37
  Yes he does. That's he has an old soul. But that little bit
• 26:41
  one got an older soul. That's our eighties child. Corey whops I skipped
• 26:52
  it. Sam says, you're a very articulate young man. Yeah, he's
• 27:03
  so sorry. I mean, I'm not like I said, I'm not that
• 27:07
  show. I mean, I'm not like how you and Marie are. You
• 27:11
  know, y'all, like you know, go out and you know, you
• 27:12
  know, being a center of attention or something like that. You know,
• 27:17
  I just before, you know, sitting on the sideline and just you know,
• 27:21
  watching and then you know learning. I'm so proud to be your mom.
• 27:32
  I am. I am absolutely elated that God gave you to me.
• 27:45
  That's why I love on you as much as I can. Oh, thank
• 27:52
  you brand this definitely we have to break this. Oh girtis is like a
• 28:07
  huge step for me. But my son says some things to me. He
• 28:14
  wrote me a letter, So there you go, to Cory, there you
• 28:29
  go. When I tell y'all, he is the calm to my storm.
• 28:38
  I'm a fireside, he's a water sign, so he definitely calms my storm.
• 28:45
  He's he's the peacemaker, he's the mediator. He doesn't like, you
• 28:52
  know, he doesn't like all the right rye eat more. Hey, y'all
• 28:59
  chill you know. So so one day to healthy mother, son relationships which
• 29:08
  goes ahead, goes ahead, and it leads me to my next question for
• 29:12
  you, how do we uncover the root of Mother's song conflicts. It's most
• 29:23
  definitely just you know, addressing the past and I guess trying to like do
• 29:33
  a make y'all understand each other. And it's most definitely you know, trying
• 29:41
  to try to forgive the past and you know, try to you know,
• 29:47
  like someone said in the comments, move forward, move forward to a healthier
• 29:51
  relationship, because it's not dwelling on the pass only hurts the person even worse
• 29:59
  some Sometimes you just gotta figure out a way to let go of that pain
• 30:04
  so you can move on and grow as a person. Clarity, she said.
• 30:17
  He says you have a spirit like his daughter. He said, he
• 30:19
  sees your own level of confidence and you're very direct. Absolutely he didn't get
• 30:27
  a little bit of that for me, Anthony, as he says, you're
• 30:33
  a balanced I'm the fire, he's the water, and we balance each other
• 30:37
  out. And I think that's why we were once so close. He's like,
• 30:45
  you know, my best friend. You know, he's like my many
• 30:48
  best friends, you know, like I talked to my son about everything.
• 30:56
  Thank you, little brother, and thank you for your service too, Elizabeth
• 31:04
  says, right, absolutely so. To really uncover the rule of our conflict,
• 31:17
  you need understanding. You have so many questions that haven't been answered.
• 31:30
  Here's your chance. What do you want to know? Well, already know
• 31:37
  why you left, and you know I under undershenerally and I don't hold that
• 31:41
  against you at all whatsoever. Uh, It's just you know, why did
• 31:52
  you treat me the way you did like when we were here? You know
• 31:56
  that's you know that I can admitine like the start of I'll be you know,
• 32:01
  disconnected. Mm hmm. Let me take a deep breath on this one.
• 32:20
  Hey, key anthan He says, I love how you give him afore
• 32:32
  the speakers piece. You can tell y'all communicate to understand and I talk over
• 32:37
  each other. I love to see it. I can learn that it should
• 32:43
  always be like that. You know, you can't really learn anything when you're
• 32:46
  talking over one another, because you know you could be saying something. I
• 32:51
  could be saying something, and you know no one will be able to listen
• 32:54
  to anything. You wouldn't hear what I say, and I wouldn't hear what
• 32:58
  you have to say. Cooler hands always prevailed. Hey, I'm signed up
• 33:07
  up, get your booty out of Facebook, jail girl. So i'ma hold
• 33:19
  off from the commons for just a moment because I didn't have a question that
• 33:27
  my son wants answered, or let me let me rephrase that that needs answered.
• 33:34
  Why did I mistreat you? It wasn't so much that I was mad
• 33:46
  at you. I was more mad at myself. You know, here I
• 33:55
  am with this baby that it could have been it was between two men.
• 34:05
  Oh, when I tell you, I'm not a shaving I slept with two
• 34:09
  men around the same time I got pregnant with my son. The one person
• 34:15
  I wanted to be your father was not but I salute him, respect him
• 34:21
  because he gave you his name. I was more piste off than myself because
• 34:34
  I wanted a father to be in your life, but unfortunately didn't work out
• 34:38
  that way. But he I'm not mad about me, but I don't all
• 34:50
  right, I don't hope you. I don't holde you responsible for anything of
• 34:53
  why I don't have my father in my life. You know, it's like
• 34:59
  a like, it's not your fault, really, it's more of you know,
• 35:02
  he chose to leave. So I've accepted that he left, and you
• 35:07
  know, I have no plans with making any contact with him. And you
• 35:09
  know I have grown to like look up to look up to other people,
• 35:15
  you know, like my cousin, Yeah, like my cousin Jason, and
• 35:19
  my history teacher, you know, mostly my history teacher because you know,
• 35:24
  I was part of this mo mentor program, and you know, just seeing
• 35:28
  him like, you know, leading you know, just be himself, it's
• 35:34
  it's it's sort of like, you know, I felt like a father figure
• 35:37
  to him. He kind of kind of like how you know in Freshman's Hole
• 35:40
  Will how Will and Uncle Phil. That's how I felt with my history teacher.
• 35:46
  Absolutely, So let me take it to the beginning. The way I
• 36:00
  treated you was my pain because I wanted somebody to hurt like me. My
• 36:15
  dad wasn't in my life. I never felt like your grandmother loved me.
• 36:24
  I always felt like when she looked at me that I was a reminder of
• 36:28
  my dad. Pain. I had a lot of unresolved issues, and I
• 36:37
  thought having a baby would feel that void, but it didn't. I didn't
• 37:01
  know how to love me. I didn't even love me, so how could
• 37:07
  I love you. I wanted somebody to hurt just like me, and you
• 37:16
  caught the boy of my bullshit. It wasn't because I hated you. I
• 37:25
  hated me. I hated myself. I hated everything about me. I always
• 37:43
  felt like I was the outsider. I always felt like, really, love
• 37:47
  shall more than me. So you caught my paint on Intentionally, I said
• 38:07
  things to you that you didn't even deserve. But I wanted you to hurt.
• 38:16
  I wanted everybody around me to hurt. I wanted everybody to hurt,
• 38:30
  but I held onto that pain because it was safe for me. So in
• 38:37
  tune, I mistreated my children. I did I hurt y'all. I know
• 38:49
  I did. I tell the world I know I hurt my children, and
• 38:57
  through my pain, I still struggled to love y'all. H When you wrote
• 39:06
  that letter to me, I think I cried for three or four days,
• 39:16
  but I needed to hear it. It hurt because it was the truth.
• 39:27
  I think that's what hurt me the most is because it was the truth.
• 39:31
  And the hardest things that I had to do was standing in that mirror,
• 39:40
  can admit to myself that I had a problem. I take accountability for the
• 39:57
  pain. I own it. I walk in there I'm not gonna never turn
• 40:05
  away from that. But every day I asked God to make me a better
• 40:12
  woman than a better mother. I asked you every day bring me closer to
• 40:22
  my children. I ask every day and I take the necessary steps to be
• 40:32
  a better mother because I know it's not too late. Yes, you're nineteen
• 40:39
  and I missed out on some of the most imperative times. But I ask
• 40:52
  that you forgive me and I want to start today. I do need you,
• 41:06
  I do love you. I'm so proud of the man that you are
• 41:13
  growing in to be. I'm so proud of you. I'm elated to you
• 41:22
  that despite all the pain that I've inflicted on you, you still managed to
• 41:27
  stand tall. I'm so proud of you. I own it hurt that you
• 41:37
  feel. I do say this. I'm definitely proud of the woman that I'm
• 41:52
  growing into me. I'm definitely proud of the mother that I'm growing into me.
• 42:02
  I know I should have been a mother from the beginning. From the
• 42:05
  very beginning, I didn't know how. I didn't know how to be a
• 42:14
  mother to you. I didn't know how to be a mother to your sisters.
• 42:23
  Wait a minute, you got quite a few comments every day. She
• 42:40
  and Facebook jail for twenty four days. As for you, thank you,
• 42:59
  miss Alex. I definitely appreciate it. We appreciate and I said I wasn't
• 43:07
  gonna get emotional night, But I didn't thank you. I don't know.
• 43:43
  I think maybe I was expecting, you know, when I came back to
• 43:46
  just jump right back in and and just everything go back to normal. You
• 43:52
  know, I didn't know, you know, as I said before, when
• 43:57
  I when I had the same conversation when my daughter, I didn't know the
• 44:00
  extent of the pain. Let me put these on cause I'm blind, y'all.
• 44:07
  I didn't know the extent of the pain. Then, you know,
• 44:15
  Samon's it's hard every day. It's long overdue. Like I said, that
• 44:35
  pain was was a safe and secure place for me. I didn't know what
• 44:40
  it was like to genuinely be happy. We have a lot of comments.
• 44:52
  M I love you too. M M. I just want a better relationship
• 45:16
  with my children. I just I want my babies. Oh thanks friend,
• 45:22
  H Yeah, should say feelings are meant to be seldy and not dwelled then
• 45:59
  mhm. That's all that we can do right now instead of you know,
• 46:21
  me still being angry at her and you know, having this hatred and anger
• 46:25
  towards me. I gotta, you know, learn her story and understand from
• 46:30
  where she came where she came from. So that's all I can do.
• 46:47
  I'm so solid. I genuinely mean, I love you so much to cor
• 47:04
  Dwayne Gober and I hope that you forgive me. I didn't know that's for
• 47:24
  you. Jgory. Oh, his graduation was the happiest thing. H m
• 47:45
  hm oh. I've absolutely asked God to step in. M Brandon says,
• 48:04
  thank you. They coming in. Corey, that's for you. Thank you.
• 48:36
  Warren. Oh. Oh, I know we had a back in November
• 48:53
  of last year. We had a big blue up to me and my son.
• 49:01
  We got physical and that was not the first time. And that's when
• 49:07
  he wrote me the letter and I knew then I had to go and I
• 49:15
  had to get help. That night changed me forever. That not rocked me
• 49:27
  to the core. Wow, you know, since you're right, I had
• 49:50
  been carrying you know, Dr Cory, I'm gonna I'm gonna talk to you.
• 49:57
  I had been carrying the low for so long that your letter because I
• 50:09
  knew how Mary felt. I just never knew how you felt because you don't
• 50:15
  talk. You don't talk. I mean, yeah, you know, I've
• 50:32
  never really noticed it, but you know, after you know, reminiscing in
• 50:37
  the past with my grandmother and my aunt, and you know, I've noticed,
• 50:42
  like during my elementary school years and half of my middle school years,
• 50:47
  I was, you know, always smiling and you know, and over zealous
• 50:55
  young man that I was over over joyous. I would you know, you
• 51:01
  don't want to, you know, I don't know how do I explain it.
• 51:07
  It's like when you know that metaphord saying, oh, if you give
• 51:09
  your kids sugar, they'll bounce off the walls, that sort of thing.
• 51:13
  You know, that that's how I was. And then you know, throughout
• 51:17
  middle school that's you know, I've noticed, you know, I didn't really
• 51:24
  have that much reliable friends very much. You know, it's kind of you
• 51:30
  know, been on my own really, and you know, in high school,
• 51:34
  I was, you know, sort of you know, the little over
• 51:37
  zealous kid in my freshman and sophomore but like during my junior and senior year,
• 51:44
  that's when I like only had like a select a few friends and just
• 51:51
  kept quiet and didn't like speak or anything like I you know built that wall
• 51:59
  to people, you know, because there are people you know that would say,
• 52:02
  hey, I would just say, you know, pay what's up and
• 52:05
  then just go back to doing what I was doing. That would be it.
• 52:12
  And also sometimes you know, I would want you know, I would
• 52:16
  say I wouldn't want friends. But you know, I gotta realize that I
• 52:20
  gotta let go of that barrier that I built along with myself. And that's
• 52:25
  what I did going on to college, you know. And I know,
• 52:36
  do you remember that mhm, my love, I missed that that smile.
• 52:52
  This is what I mean when I say you were my right hand. I
• 53:01
  think you're the coolest kid. I know. I think you're awesome. I
• 53:10
  think you're amazing. I really do. I look at these pictures and and
• 53:22
  and it it takes me back to I should have never left that little boy.
• 53:38
  I know you felt a bandy. I know you did. That's the
• 53:51
  coolest kid. I'm telling you, you are just awesome. You're awesome,
• 54:02
  and I'm very proud of you. And I walked tonight. We can close
• 54:12
  the door on the past and walk into the future. Ye I'm here.
• 54:25
  I'm here. Like I say, I know you're older, You're nineteen.
• 54:32
  You'll be twenty in January. But I'm gonna protect you no matter how old
• 54:43
  you get, even whenever you get married and who decide to have grandkid,
• 54:53
  you know, bring me some grand babies and and and this time I will
• 55:00
  be there for them. And I'm here. I love that we hang out.
• 55:16
  I've gotten to know you. So there's a question for you. Oh
• 55:30
  yeah, not just you know, because of what she is. Just you
• 55:36
  know everything that I you know, went through, you know, not having
• 55:40
  a dad, you know, being angry with him. You know, I
• 55:44
  can admit to myself that, you know, I don't I don't really like
• 55:47
  open up as much as people. I just you know, ball it up
• 55:52
  and just you know, just lay it off and be like whatever, I'll
• 55:58
  I won't deal with it at all, or deal with it later or anything,
• 56:00
  or like I turned into something else that distracts me from it. And
• 56:07
  yeah, from you know, I forgot who it was, but it was
• 56:17
  such to myself that I'm like a ticking time bomb. And you know it's
• 56:23
  not just I blow up on area. Is just I blow up on the
• 56:27
  person that wouldn't deserve it. And you know that was me, That was
• 56:42
  me, Absolutely, God is absolutely moving. God is amazing. Yeah,
• 56:54
  y'all better say that, Anticia, say, twenty twenty isn't in vain?
• 57:02
  Oh, wasn't that? It's never too late. I don't give up.
• 57:13
  I'll never give up. I can admit to myself that, you know,
• 57:22
  during that time in November when I watched that letter, I was at the
• 57:25
  point of, you know, with my life, of you know, never
• 57:30
  speaking to you again, you know. But you know, my aunt told
• 57:37
  me I shouldn't do that, you know, because because I know a part
• 57:40
  of me would still want to, would still want to uh be you know,
• 57:46
  be in a relationship with you, and you know I get I get
• 57:53
  I you know, I just can't do that. So I'm glad. I'm
• 57:58
  proud of myself that I'm opening up that door that you know, you and
• 58:02
  I can you know, you know, forgive, forgive and be able to
• 58:08
  move forward in the future. One problem that's for you, Glory. Yeah,
• 58:27
  you're absolutely correct. You know, I'm not the type you know that
• 58:32
  will like, like I like blow up at like a minor convenience or anything
• 58:39
  like that, you know, because there are times where you know I would
• 58:44
  just like, you know, stop myself and you know, like just calm
• 58:46
  myself down and then you know, address the issue. But like they're you
• 58:52
  know, I say it, my buns can be pushed so many times that
• 58:57
  you know, there there's a point where you know, but yeah, my
• 59:06
  brothers gonna be questioned so many times. But like there are certain times where
• 59:08
  like if it's a little too much, that's when I blow up. Sam
• 59:23
  says, you need me as much as I need You can say yes,
• 59:31
  Lord, So let me ask you this. Let me ask you one question,
• 59:45
  and I'm gonna let that's on you. You talk about it. How
• 59:53
  do you repair a broken mother son relationship? I'm not saying a word not
• 1:00:04
  a relationships. Yeah, it's most definitely depends on the person because they are
• 1:00:12
  definitely most people, you know, mother it's not gonna have a rocky relationship
• 1:00:15
  and the sun would cut ties with their mother and just like live on their
• 1:00:19
  life. And it's definitely you know, being able to talk with one another,
• 1:00:30
  you know community, Like people say, communication is key to everything,
• 1:00:35
  regardless of relationships. So how do we repair our broken mother son relationship?
• 1:00:51
  It's definitely you know, not just you, but also on me too,
• 1:00:54
  you know, uh I actually, you know, open up up to where
• 1:01:02
  I'm comfortable, not you know, not spill everything, but you know,
• 1:01:07
  open up at where I'm comfortable, work at my own pace, you know,
• 1:01:13
  because like you said, you know, like nothing can change like overnight.
• 1:01:16
  It's a process, you know. That's that's why we're here today to
• 1:01:20
  do this, to do this. So I'm gonna ask you can say you
• 1:01:29
  can't keep a bottle up. You have to talk it out. You both
• 1:01:34
  do all agree. I didn't talk about it, and and granted I didn't
• 1:01:43
  know, I I won't say I didn't know. I wasn't ready, you
• 1:01:51
  know, to sit down and have that conversation with my children, you know,
• 1:01:57
  because I felt like your grandma to play a big, a major role
• 1:02:04
  in our relationship as well, you know, And once I am mentally and
• 1:02:15
  emotionally ready to address that with your grandmother, I have to, you know,
• 1:02:24
  because I felt like she said some things that really kind of drove a
• 1:02:30
  wedge between us. Granted, fifty percent, I'll say, let me,
• 1:02:35
  let me rephrase that. Seventy five percent of that was me, but I
• 1:02:39
  feel like she was another twenty five percent. I feel like she put y'all
• 1:02:46
  involved, y'all in situations that didn't involve y'all. You know, granted,
• 1:02:52
  you guys saw the other side of it. You know, you saw me
• 1:02:59
  acting a damn fool, punching holes in the walls, police being called me,
• 1:03:06
  going to jail, y'all saw that. But for every cause, there's
• 1:03:13
  an effect. And I don't solely blame it all on her, but she's
• 1:03:19
  part of my trauma. She's part of my pain. And my father is
• 1:03:24
  the other hand. You know, like I say that cycle, we gotta
• 1:03:34
  break it, you know, linz just say the generational curse. Absolutely,
• 1:03:40
  we have to stop sweeping stuff under the rug. We have to start addressing
• 1:03:45
  these issues head on. And that's what I've noticed in most in the black
• 1:03:52
  community with you know, black parenting. You know, I would see videos
• 1:03:57
  on you know, not just veriosable, like you know, you know,
• 1:04:01
  moms or fathers, you know, you know, embarrassing their kids are like
• 1:04:05
  you know, talking to them like they're grown, like they're adults. You
• 1:04:10
  know, like that lady downstairs, you know, seeing that like it hurts
• 1:04:15
  it. It just hurts, really it it because you know, we've we've
• 1:04:25
  been through that and seeing that for me, it's you know, because you
• 1:04:31
  know, the whole expectation of a mother's son. You know, they're supposed
• 1:04:34
  to be loving and they're suposed to love each other, but you know,
• 1:04:38
  seeing that, you know it, it just breaks my heart really because you
• 1:04:43
  know, you know, whenever I see something like that, I feel like,
• 1:04:45
  you know, the son or daughter is gonna grow up and you know
• 1:04:50
  they're gonna end up not having a relationship with that with their mother or father
• 1:04:57
  in we should definitely break that chain, not just you know, as mean
• 1:05:01
  you, but like our whole community should, you know, fix that.
• 1:05:06
  And I'm sorry and I know and I know some of them would would not
• 1:05:14
  admit it, but they should, you know, not pass on their anger
• 1:05:21
  in their trum bunch to their kids because you know their kids will end up
• 1:05:26
  growing up and you know, it's just one huge cycle that's for you.
• 1:05:44
  It was generational list as our parents didn't communicate with us about what was going
• 1:05:50
  on in their lives. They played their strong roles, so we as kids
• 1:05:54
  did not know any better. And I want it, and I never wanted
• 1:06:00
  it. Wasn't that I didn't want y'all to know. I wasn't ready.
• 1:06:04
  I wasn't ready to I was not ready to deal and address with my own
• 1:06:09
  issues because, as I say, that pain was a safe place for me.
• 1:06:15
  I felt like if I started being a bitch to everybody, people would
• 1:06:19
  leave me to fuck alone. You know, I'm you know, I'm just
• 1:06:24
  gonna be whannted with you, you know. And I wanted everybody to be
• 1:06:30
  hurt. That was my way. I felt relief when somebody else was hurt.
• 1:06:42
  So it's almost like it's sickening, you know. I didn't know that
• 1:06:50
  I suffered from depression and anxiety until I started reaching out to my therapist and
• 1:06:59
  with her, I had to go all the way back to the beginning.
• 1:07:01
  I had to address those issues, the things that I had suppressed for so
• 1:07:09
  many years. I had to address there did I want to know? Put
• 1:07:17
  In order for me to heal and to be a better person, a better
• 1:07:20
  woman, a better friend, a better mother, I had to go to
• 1:07:27
  the beginning. I had to go look at myself in the mirror and say,
• 1:07:33
  Ashley, you are the reason that you have encountered a lot of these
• 1:07:39
  storms. You created these storms, and now you're mad because it's raining.
• 1:07:46
  I had to deal with it, and in order for me to be a
• 1:07:51
  better person, a better mother, a better woman, and in order for
• 1:07:59
  me to love my child Dan properly, I have to relearn how to love
• 1:08:01
  as you. And again I apologized that I never took the time and sat
• 1:08:11
  down and explained it to you because I knew you guys were left with all
• 1:08:16
  these unanswered questions, with all these tools, and you were just as confused.
• 1:08:29
  So oho key, when I tell you with my son wrote that letter
• 1:08:44
  to me, and I still have it. I read it whenever I feel
• 1:08:51
  like I'm having one of those moments, I will read that letter and I
• 1:08:56
  reread it and I'm like, oh, my son checked the hell out of
• 1:09:00
  me. And I wouldn't necessarily say you checked me. You gave me a
• 1:09:06
  reality check. You basically gave me an ultimatum. Either you get it together
• 1:09:15
  or we won't have a relationship at all. It is what you told me.
• 1:09:21
  And I knew I didn't want to lose my children. I knew I
• 1:09:28
  didn't I want it. I want my babies closer to me. I want
• 1:09:36
  you all close to God. I want my children to grow and be healthy,
• 1:09:47
  productive adults. I don't want to see all inflict this pain when you
• 1:09:55
  get in a relationship. Whenever you decide to have a child or children.
• 1:10:00
  I don't want you to do that be better than me. Love horn.
• 1:10:12
  Yeah, I tell myself every day, you know, someday I am gonna
• 1:10:18
  have kids, and I don't want to do what my father did and leave,
• 1:10:27
  leave and go have you know, other kids, and take care of
• 1:10:29
  them. You know, I wouldn't call myself a man if I do that.
• 1:10:34
  Like seeing what I go through, I don't want any other child to
• 1:10:40
  go through that. You're right after it. Because I was pistol, because
• 1:10:49
  I created all these storms and I was made. I was like a Tasmanian
• 1:10:56
  though I sure was a ticking time bomb. I would blow up. I
• 1:11:08
  would explode because I had so much food on my plate. That's how much
• 1:11:16
  trauma I carried around. You know, when you go to a buffet and
• 1:11:21
  you're trying to eat everything at the buffet table, and when you eat too
• 1:11:26
  much of it, it makes you sick. That's how That's how I was
• 1:11:28
  carrying that trauma. Instead of me addressing it, I would let it pile
• 1:11:34
  up and pile up like like when you when you become constipated. That's how
• 1:11:46
  I held on to that pain, that hurt, that trauma and in tune.
• 1:11:53
  I carried it on to my children, my children. I made my
• 1:11:57
  children pain and it wasn't even their fault. I created thunderstorms and and and
• 1:12:06
  bullshit for them that they didn't even ask for. I did that because I
• 1:12:14
  was hurt. I was mad, I was angry. Everybody was gonna feel
• 1:12:20
  my pain, even though they couldn't understand it or they didn't ask for it.
• 1:12:25
  But I that's that's the way I'm going. Everybody ever seen if I'm
• 1:12:29
  having a bad thing, everybody's gonna have a bad thing. And I was
• 1:12:35
  mee, But I'm soon proud of myself now because I don't create. I
• 1:12:46
  don't know if you if you've noticed it me and you were talking it,
• 1:12:55
  you know, whenever I feel like your grandmother is is irritating me. I
• 1:12:59
  had read me, I mean, all right, mama, I see you
• 1:13:02
  later, And that was something new told me. I definitely need to take
• 1:13:15
  your happy field because he doesn't talk. So I was surprisedly you sent that
• 1:13:25
  letter and it took me a holidays to reading and I read it. I
• 1:13:32
  was by myself. I was a little by which is what I needed to
• 1:13:35
  be. And you're right, mass yeah, absolutely right. So real.
• 1:13:56
  Last question, where do we go from here? M hm? So,
• 1:14:09
  uh, where do we go from here? The ball is in your court.
• 1:14:27
  It's definitely gonna you know, like I said before, We're gonna have
• 1:14:31
  to communicate some more, you know, trust each other. And you know,
• 1:14:39
  I know that you trust me, but it's just me trusting you and
• 1:14:45
  you know me being able to you know, open up more with you.
• 1:14:56
  But what lissition is, what is what is it about me you don't trust?
• 1:15:04
  Okay, So it's not much me as just uh, if I ever
• 1:15:18
  have kids, uh, I get hesitant, you know, if I ever
• 1:15:25
  associate associate them with you, because I have this feeling that maybe she's gonna
• 1:15:31
  treat them the same way that she treated me growing up and I didn't want
• 1:15:35
  that. But you know, I let go of that pain and you understand,
• 1:15:43
  you know, they're all human, you know, we all make mistakes.
• 1:15:46
  But the point is that we need to move forward to grow. So
• 1:15:53
  the question to you with are you willing to let go? Are you willing
• 1:15:58
  to for you me for the pay that I've caused, for the trauma that
• 1:16:06
  I've caused, that I've infleeted all And I'm not saying for you, I
• 1:16:14
  mean for gay? What fuck you? Yeah, I was just about to
• 1:16:18
  say, you know, I will forgive, but I won't forget. I
• 1:16:25
  I can, I can do that. I'm in the you know, part
• 1:16:28
  of my life where you know I am willing to I'm willing to forgive,
• 1:16:31
  but won't forget. Listen, it is a random story. So I just
• 1:16:41
  want to take away space. I know I'm embarrassed to you tonight. See
• 1:17:08
  no, I don't even guess my family members like that. So what you
• 1:17:14
  want, little ba think you would buy me more? Was this guy right
• 1:17:19
  here? I'm so happy that I could have been that I was there that
• 1:17:35
  h that's right, every occasion, anything that I missed, I couldn't miss
• 1:17:45
  that me to see you walk across that stage. Then you overcame with a
• 1:17:55
  lot of obstacles, but that day, beautiful, I lined it up to
• 1:18:12
  the day that I gave birth to you to what's definitely now how we story,
• 1:18:23
  but definitely how we finish the the words will for you for you were
• 1:18:36
  ready to receive you. I love you. Come on, I apologize,
• 1:18:54
  and I know I have to forgive myself. I know what I do and
• 1:19:06
  I'm willing to be a station with you as I have to be because one
• 1:19:16
  thing I do as I want that bomb back. So let me ask you
• 1:19:25
  this as we run into the end of this episode Kata gave us love.
• 1:19:39
  What do you expect from me? Oh, let me know. I won't
• 1:19:44
  say expect. Let me rephrase that. What do you need from me in
• 1:20:00
  this moment? I'm gonna be honest, I really don't know the answer to
• 1:20:05
  that. Like, if you if you could think of one thing, one
• 1:20:15
  thing, what do you need for me? I I'd say definitely to be
• 1:20:27
  secure your your security, you know, being able to feel safe around you.
• 1:20:36
  You know, how do you need me to do that? I honestly
• 1:21:00
  I have like a clear answer for that, But I honestly do not know.
• 1:21:12
  I guess you know part of my life. I'm just sort of just
• 1:21:15
  like acceptance of how the way things are that I I have no expectation of
• 1:21:26
  anything. Really, I don't. I don't know if I'm gonna be honest.
• 1:21:30
  Okay, let me let me try to rephrase the question. You say
• 1:21:36
  you need security from me? So when we see security, is it more
• 1:21:45
  time together? One on one time? Let me see the one on one
• 1:21:50
  time where we come Let me see I'm trying to. I guess in a
• 1:22:01
  way, I can say, you know, we can go out anywhere,
• 1:22:06
  and I won't. I won't, you know, be on edge for anything
• 1:22:11
  that anything could happen or anything could go down, okay, because I can't
• 1:22:17
  say, you know, h after we had that falling out in Mississippi,
• 1:22:26
  I was sort of, you know, on edged, you know, like
• 1:22:31
  if like, you know, if you were too you know, have another
• 1:22:35
  falling out, I'd be ready. But I don't want that. I don't
• 1:22:41
  want to always, you know, expecting to fight with you. I don't.
• 1:22:48
  I don't want that. Okay, I respect it. I understand that.
• 1:23:00
  So I didn't write a list. But these are the things that I'm
• 1:23:10
  I'm going to do. I'm gonna love y'all a little harder every day.
• 1:23:19
  I'm gonna continue to work on me, and I'm gonna forgive myself for the
• 1:23:27
  past. I can't change what happened. I can only make things right and
• 1:23:38
  better for the future. And I'm willing to be patient with you, but
• 1:23:50
  you have to be patient with me. I fall short, I slip up,
• 1:23:59
  I fall down, I fuck up, so you have to be patient
• 1:24:05
  with me. I'm in no rush, really, I don't expect like after
• 1:24:15
  this the next day, you you know, be a completely different person.
• 1:24:19
  You know, I don't expect you know, things are like change quickly.
• 1:24:24
  You do it at your own page. Real. Anthony say, this is
• 1:24:30
  a start. We have to build off of this. He say, being
• 1:24:33
  present and consistent is good. We just love on each other absolutely. Every
• 1:24:39
  day that I go over there, I hug and kiss on him, and
• 1:24:44
  I tell him all the time, I don't care how old you get,
• 1:24:48
  You're gonna always be my baby, He says. We need patience and be
• 1:24:58
  able to trust each other absolutely. M and I think we're headed in the
• 1:25:04
  right direction. If I could judge myself from this same time last year,
• 1:25:15
  I think I've really greatly improved. We've gotten a little closer. What do
• 1:25:27
  you think. Yeah, we hang out more. I do want you to
• 1:25:36
  come over and hang out with me. You got a call, come see
• 1:25:44
  me surprising. That's the only thing I want from you. Come over and
• 1:25:49
  hang out with me sometimes, just me and you play the video games like
• 1:25:58
  we used to. I like that. So we're gonna go ahead, and
• 1:26:12
  we're gonna go into those final thoughts. So tonight's episode was mother son relationships
• 1:26:26
  I'm so glad that you know people tuned in, and you know, I
• 1:26:30
  want to thank everybody for the love, to support, the comments, for
• 1:26:34
  the positivity as me and my son go down, our role of forgiveness and
• 1:26:42
  healing tonight was needed, not just for me, but for my son.
• 1:26:49
  I'm learning to not be so dismissive of their feelings, but to listen more
• 1:27:00
  so when he speaks out, I'm gonna listen. I'm definitely gonna work on
• 1:27:08
  forgiving myself and letting that go because I can't change what's already had. I
• 1:27:15
  can only work on the future. And who knows, y'all might see me
• 1:27:21
  holding a grand baby. I didn't see it was gonna be from you.
• 1:27:29
  It could be. So here we go. Anthony says, you have to
• 1:27:45
  forgive me, and I have to forgive myself. We start off like that
• 1:27:51
  and we keep going. I definitely agree. So I make my declaration today,
• 1:28:05
  Ashley, I forgive you. You. Just continue working on being a
• 1:28:15
  better person, a better woman, and a better mother. You love yourself,
• 1:28:24
  and when you love yourself, the love false right on in the place,
• 1:28:28
  the needed love to my son. I love you. I definitely hold
• 1:28:41
  myself accountable and I know we're gonna be just fine. But thank you for
• 1:28:59
  letting your walls down and letting me come in that door that you kept locked
• 1:29:04
  for so long. I'll be consistent. I'm gonna rebuild the trust, and
• 1:29:18
  I know this time next year will be better than what we were in the
• 1:29:24
  past. I'm kind of ford that I'm asking God to step in. What
• 1:29:32
  are your final thoughts. It's definitely opened my eyes for some things that I
• 1:29:44
  didn't know and give me clarity for some things I didn't know. All I
• 1:29:53
  can say right now was that I think that will be okay. It's gonna
• 1:30:00
  take a slow process, but you know, that's that's all we can do
• 1:30:06
  right now. But but I believe you know, in the near future,
• 1:30:13
  things won't all things. Things won't be exactly how things are currently. I
• 1:30:23
  needed that. I love you. I love you too. So to all
• 1:30:33
  my viewers, my friends, my loved ones, my supporters. I love
• 1:30:40
  each and ever last one of y'all. I appreciate the comments, I appreciate
• 1:30:44
  all the kind words. Keep praying for us, Keep praying for us,
• 1:30:53
  keep praying for me, Pray for my son, Pray for my other two
• 1:30:56
  children, my daughters, my girls, pray for them. But I also
• 1:31:02
  want to tell y'all don't forget like, share, subscribe, follow me on
• 1:31:10
  Facebook, Instagram, Twitter. I'm on all the streaming platforms. I had
• 1:31:16
  to have a thing for a minute. I'm on all the streaming platforms.
• 1:31:23
  And I will see you guys next two well not next Tuesday, because this
• 1:31:30
  is but this season. That's that's the end. But what's today's day?
• 1:31:36
  Today? It's the tenth, So I will see y'all seventy the twenty.
• 1:31:45
  Let me pull my calendar. Y'all know I'm sloping. Y'all have to bear
• 1:31:48
  with me. I will see y'all on the twenty fourth, November twenty fourth,
• 1:31:56
  Well you know what we'll see. We're playing out goals. But just
• 1:32:00
  know it's about to get Juice sick. Next season is gonna be Juice said.
• 1:32:06
  So again to everybody that tuned in, thank you again for all the
• 1:32:11
  love and support that you showed me and my son tonight. Again, keep
• 1:32:15
  reading for us, and as my son says, we're gonna be okay.
• 1:32:21
  Anything you want to say, yeah, I got nothing. Well, I
• 1:32:30
  thank you for being open and vulnerable tonight, Yeah, which is something that
• 1:32:40
  you've never done So I'm I'm so happy that you're joined me tonight, and
• 1:32:47
  let the role to recovery and healing and forgiveness begin the day. All right,
• 1:32:57
  all right, So to all my I love you guys, Keep loving,
• 1:33:01
  liking, sharing, subscribing to Black Girls Interrupted. Don't forget. I
• 1:33:04
  am on YouTube as well. So I hope everyone has a great night.
• 1:33:09
  I hope everyone enjoyed tonight's episode. If you do, If you have,
• 1:33:14
  you know, broken relationship with your children, mend, mend, mend,
• 1:33:17
  mend, mend, mended, you know, repair me get on it right
• 1:33:20
  now. You know we're all on barrow time. Oh our last coming for
• 1:33:29
  the night. You're welcome, Keata, you are welcome. Girl. You
• 1:33:35
  know this may help somebody, you know, my story may not be somebody
• 1:33:42
  else's story, but hey, who knows. But I love your guys,
• 1:33:47
  and I hope to you guys. I don't know. We'll see, We'll
• 1:33:53
  see. I may have something playing, something special playing for you guys next
• 1:33:56
  week. We'll see. But again, tune in forget I go live every
• 1:34:00
  Tuesday night, EPM Central time, nine pm Eastern Time. Don't forget,
• 1:34:05
  to like, share, and subscribe to a Black Girl Interrupted. Love y'all