Latest / The Comeback Career Podcast with Fexingo: Returning After a Gap, Stay-at-Home Re-Entry / How a Career Gap Can Help You Rebrand Your Identity
Transcript
- Lucas: Today I want to talk about something a lot of returners struggle with but rarely name out loud: the feeling that your career gap erased your professional identity. Luna: Yeah, that imposter feeling when you update your LinkedIn and realise the last job title was years ago. Lucas: Exactly. But there is a counterintuitive strategy here — you can use the gap to deliberately rebuild your identity into something stronger. Not by hiding the gap, but by rebranding through it. Luna: Let me guess — you have a specific example. Lucas: I do. A woman named Priya — former marketing manager at a midsize consumer goods company. She left work when her twins were born, planned to return after a year, then Covid hit, and suddenly she was home for 14 months, then 18, then 24. By the time she was ready to go back, her marketing skills felt stale, and she didn't want to compete for the same roles she left. Luna: So she didn't go back to marketing? Lucas: She went into UX research. No formal degree, no boot camp. She spent about three months during her gap teaching herself user research methods — card sorting, usability testing — mostly through free resources and volunteering to test prototypes for a friend's startup. Luna: And she got hired? Lucas: At a well-known fintech company. And here's the key: she didn't frame the gap as 'I took time off to raise kids.' She framed it as 'I used that time to develop deep observational and analytical skills by managing complex schedules for two unpredictable users, and then I applied those skills to user research.' Luna: That's a reframe. She basically did a career pivot by leaning into the gap story, not apologising for it. Lucas: Exactly. And there's research to back this up. A 2025 study from the Federal Reserve Bank of New York looked at workers who took career breaks of more than six months. They found that those who returned to a different occupation — not the same one — saw a smaller wage penalty than those who returned to their old occupation. Luna: That's surprising. You'd think going back to familiar work would be easier. Lucas: You would, but the data suggests that if you go back to a job you left, employers compare you against your younger self. If you pivot into something new, you're judged against other new entrants. And you bring a fresh perspective that nobody else has. Luna: So the gap becomes a competitive advantage. Lucas: If you manage it right. That's what we're going to unpack today — a three-step framework for rebranding your identity during a career gap. Luna: Okay, lay it out. Lucas: Step one: audit your transferable skills. Not just the obvious ones from your previous job, but the ones you built during the gap. Parenting, caregiving, volunteering, managing a household budget — those are real skills. Priya used 'project management' from coordinating daycare pickup and meal prep. She used 'conflict resolution' from toddler negotiations. Luna: And she put those on her resume? Lucas: Not exactly as 'toddler negotiations.' She translated them: 'Managed concurrent schedules for multiple stakeholders with competing priorities.' That's just a professional way of saying she got two kids to daycare and herself to a dentist appointment on time. Luna: I love that. Step two? Lucas: Step two: reframe your narrative. This is the part most people skip. They go back to work and just say 'I took a break to focus on family.' That's honest but it doesn't help you. Instead, craft a short story that connects your gap to the new role. Luna: Give me an example sentence. Lucas: For someone returning to a corporate job after five years at home: 'I spent those years deepening my understanding of how people make decisions under constraint — whether that's a parent choosing a school district or a customer choosing a product. That lens makes me a better researcher.' It's true, and it's compelling. Luna: I think the hardest part is believing it yourself. Lucas: That's why step three matters: target roles where your gap is an asset. Don't apply to jobs that require five years of continuous experience in the exact same field. Look for roles that explicitly value diverse backgrounds. UX research is one. So is program management, customer insights, people analytics, even product management. Luna: And there are companies that actively recruit returners. Lucas: Many large firms have return to work programs. Amazon has 'Amazon Returnship,' Microsoft has a 'Career Re-start' program. But you don't need a formal program. Priya didn't use one. She just found a job posting at a fintech that said 'we welcome candidates with non-linear career paths,' and she applied. Luna: So the gap itself becomes a signal that you can navigate change. Lucas: Right. And hiring managers are starting to get that. But we should talk about the practical mechanics. Luna: Like what? Lucas: How to handle LinkedIn during a gap. Most people put 'Stay-at-home parent' or just have a gap with no explanation. That's fine, but you can do better. Create a 'career break' entry with a description of what you did — not just parenting, but any projects, volunteering, courses. Luna: And what about the interview? The dreaded 'so what have you been doing?' Lucas: That question is actually an opportunity. If you've done step one and two, you have a story ready. You say: 'I stepped away from full-time work to focus on my family, and during that time I developed skills X, Y, and Z, which I'm excited to bring to this role.' Short, confident, forward-looking. Luna: And you don't apologise. Lucas: Never. The moment you apologise, you signal doubt. Own it. The gap happened. It's part of your story. And for many employers, it shows resilience and perspective. Luna: That reminds me of something. A listener named Jen wrote in — she's been out of the workforce for three years, two kids, and she said she feels like she's lost her professional identity completely. She asked: 'How do I even start to figure out what I want to do now?' Lucas: Good question. I'd say start with the audit. Write down everything you did during the gap that required a skill — even if it felt mundane. Planning meals, budgeting, mediating sibling fights, organising playdates. Then translate each one into a business skill. Luna: And then what? She might still feel lost. Lucas: Then take a free online course in a field that interests her. Just one. UX research, project management, data analysis. See if it clicks. The gap is the perfect time to experiment — no employer is watching. Luna: That's solid. And I want to add one thing: don't compare your timeline to others. Some people return after six months, some after six years. The right time is when you're ready. Lucas: And if we've helped you think through that timing or the strategy, we want you to know why this show can stay focused on these specific topics without ads. Luna: Right. A small group of listeners already chip in monthly at buy me a coffee dot com slash fexingo, and that support is what lets us keep making episodes like this one, ad-free, every single day. Lucas: It's not a big ask. Just mentioning it because knowing that listeners find value in what we do keeps us going. And if you ever want to be part of that, the link is easy to remember. Luna: Alright, back to the topic. One thing I want to circle back to is the networking piece. How do you network when you've been out? Lucas: Start with informational interviews. Reach out to people in roles you find interesting and ask for twenty minutes. Most people say yes. And you don't have to have a polished background — you just have to be curious. Luna: And use your gap as a conversation starter. 'I'm exploring a return to work after some time away, and I'm really interested in how you got into this field.' That's disarming. Lucas: Exactly. People love talking about themselves. And you'll learn what skills are actually needed, which courses are respected, and maybe even get a referral. Luna: So the gap is not a liability. It's a different starting point. Lucas: It is. And if you approach it strategically — audit, reframe, target — you can come out more focused and more confident than when you left. Luna: I think the biggest takeaway for me is that you don't have to go back to the same job. You can reinvent yourself. Lucas: And the gap gives you permission to do that. No one expects you to be exactly who you were three years ago. You've changed. So your career can too. Luna: Alright, that's a good note to end on. Next episode: how a career gap helped someone launch a consulting practice. Lucas: See you then.