Latest / The MillionaireByMorning‘s Podcast / Unmute Your Voice with The Power of Storytelling
Transcript
- Rashad Thirlkill: Hello, hello, hello, welcome back. Today on the Millionaire by Morning Podcast, we're talking about something that can fundamentally change change the trajectory of your career and your business. Finding your voice and learning how to use it with power. My guest is Dr. Rita Renee, a global keynote speaker, two times TED X speaker, best selling author. Executive Leadership and Voice Strategist and founder of Ultimate Powerhouse Coach. With more than 35 years of professional leadership, health care, and entrepreneurial experience, Dr. Rita Vene helps leaders and entrepreneurs unmute their voices, communicate their value with clarity, and turn their experiences and expertise into greater visibility, influence, and impact. She's also a familiar face on CBS17's My Carolina, where she shares practical insights on business, networking, and financial empowerment. Today we're going to talk about what happens when experienced leaders stop playing small, find the courage to use their voice, and turn what they've learned into something that creates influence, opportunity, and legacy. Dr. Rita Renee, welcome to Millionaire by Monday. Dr Rita Renee: Thank you so much for having me. Rashad Thirlkill: I just want to say to you, you could have been anywhere in world, but you are here with myself and my guest, my listeners, and for that we are very grateful. And so. Dr Rita Renee: Excited to be here. Can't wait for the conversation. Rashad Thirlkill: All right, let's jump into it. Let's let's get a ⁓ introduction to yourself. ⁓ you describe yourself as an executive, leadership, and voice strategist. What exactly does it mean to help someone unmute their voice? Dr Rita Renee: Yes, thank you for that question. So many people, no matter if they have a degree, titles, positions, they have so much wisdom and insight, they're sometimes afraid of voicing their opinions in a room, especially when they feel like they're going to be judged, misunderstood. And so my my whole goal is to unlock that voice, unlock those ideas. Even unlock the opposition that you may feel inside and communicate that with clarity, confidence, and also do not apologize for it. And so my whole goal is to make sure that people know that they have a voice. You don't need to find it. You just need to let it have permission to unmute. Rashad Thirlkill: Right. So what are leaders and entrepreneurs losing when they know they have something valuable to say, but they're not saying? Dr Rita Renee: Well, they're actually losing their ⁓ credibility and their their even their own position. They're also relinquishing authority that they have earned all those times and all those years that they spent in school, but not only school, but experience. So when they're keeping their mouth closed, I often tell executives, I also tell business owners and entrepreneurs, when your mouth is closed, guess what? Your business is closed. And you can't contribute and you cannot move a company in a certain position or trajectory if you're not using your voice to do that. And it's not just your voice. You have to ⁓ allow other voices, invite other voices in the conversation as well. So leaders, they're looking for people that do not have the like the constantly manage, you know, people all the time, right? So people who can think. communicate, they can take ownership, and then they can move the mission forward. That's what a good leader does. Rashad Thirlkill: Okay. All right. So as far as experience, you spent more than 35 years in the leadership, healthcare, entrepreneurship, and professional development. What has that experience taught you about what separates people who have expertise from people who actually become influential? Dr Rita Renee: Mm-hmm. Right. And we see this all the time. Just because a person will come into a position, I've seen this especially when they have a lot of turnover or someone, there's a new president that comes, they bring their entourage, and they may just have the education, but they don't have the experience. And I've seen where people have excluded the people that had experience and not the credentials out of the business. You need both. You need the education, yes, that can take you, but so far, but the experience, it lets you know that I've been in the trenches. I have what it takes to make sure that the needle can move forward, that we can scale our business. I have the insights. And just to share a short story and example about that, I've been at the same company for 22 years. That means I know what happened in the beginning versus what's happening now. And what I've seen that people have gone full circle. Doing the same thing that we tried to do like 20 years ago and it hasn't worked. I'm I'm the one who has the archive of what we have done and what hasn't worked. When you exclude those people with that experience and acknowledge, you really limit the business because now you're taking steps that are unnecessary, that can help build the business, or that will make the business go backwards if you exclude those people just because they don't have the credentials. Rashad Thirlkill: Understood. Understood. ⁓ wow. That makes a lot of sense. so ⁓ basically what you're saying is in a sense a leader knows when to take people with him, when to move the people. Dr Rita Renee: Yes. A good leader is not threatened by the skills that others have. Especially if they are a leader of very high performers. And for instance, I manage a group of nurses. There are twenty of them. I have promoted so many nurses and they're not the only twenty, there's the twenty I have right now. But over time, people who have been on my team have been promoted to managers. They've gotten ⁓ promotions in other areas within the company and I helped grow them and take part of that journey. I had had some people that say, you know what, I don't want to I don't want to go anywhere. I want to stay here. And I have pushed them out the nest. So a real leader is not afraid to see growth with on that within their system, within their ecosystem, right? Because that to me is a great reflection of who you are as a leader. Rashad Thirlkill: You mentioned the word ecosystem and and that word is becoming so important nowadays due to ⁓ due to the the digital aspects of all things, due to the fact that ⁓ we are becoming very tribe like. How important is it to have an ecosystem as it relates to ⁓ the the group or the Dr Rita Renee: Mm. Rashad Thirlkill: the the tribe that a person is trying to build. Dr Rita Renee: Well, to be honest, you can't do the things that you want to do alone. You only can get so far when you're doing it yourself. An ecosystem helps you continue to move towards your path and your journey without feeling that you're doing it alone, but they also bring forth resources and skills that can help better you as you're moving, as you're belonging, as you're ⁓ becoming who you want to be. Right? Because we start off as, you know, I say as a ⁓ a newbie. You start off as a beginner, right? We're all growing, right? We're all evolving. But when you have that ecosystem of people holding you accountable, ⁓ letting you know, hey, this is not the right way, or giving you the advice that you can trust that you can you can count on based on their actions, based on their results, right? ⁓ that you can take their advice. And so I think it's so important because a lot of times we won't think that we need all these other people in our circle, all these people in our ecosystem, right? But you just need the right people to go on the journey with you. You don't need everybody. And I think a lot of people get stuck where they are because they're trying to please the ecosystem that they're that shouldn't be assigned to them in the first place. Your ecosystem is not there to constrain you in a box. Your ecosystem is a a ⁓ as a a way to let you know that, hey, I'm going on this path. I don't have to go alone. However, if I'm going in the wrong direction, I want somebody that's gonna be honest with me, right? To stop me in my tracks. And when you can accept that, when you can embrace that, that's where I see the a lot of leaders really flourish and grow. Rashad Thirlkill: Definitely. I like that. And that's for people that's listening to this particular show. ⁓ I don't know if you speak on basically it it is marketing, social media. ⁓ people having a large following are going viral. And you you just kind of spoke on that. That's not necessarily a necessity to have a large. Dr Rita Renee: Mm-hmm. ⁓ huh. No, because again, that can be a catch 22. Like what type of people are actually following you? You do you know who they are, their background, right, and their connections? Because remember, when you're engaging with a whole lot of people, you and you don't know their background, you could be engaging with someone that is not not a good person to engage with, right? It can help hurt your reputation. It can damage your brand. So you want to ⁓ build an authentic. Authentic, right? Following people that you have those relationships with, people that you and you may have to vet them along the way. You may have to, you may have to shed some people away from your brand and from from that that that following. And it's very important to always not to just go lily willy and just move on, like, you know what, they're followers, I gotta all these followers. Yeah, but are they authentic followers? Are do they have your best interests, right? And are w are they are you able to contribute to them, to their lives to make it better and vice versa? Because we have this one way transaction, no matter it's social media, is it business, entrepreneurship, ⁓ executive, it should not be a one-way transaction. It should go both ways. We s both should be benefiting and bettering ourselves. Rashad Thirlkill: Definitely. Definitely. I one hundred percent agree. How important is communication style? Dr Rita Renee: Mm. And Rashad Thirlkill: Now I know I can like I can speak to this as far as being a salesperson. They, they, you know, you're you're taught in sales classes that, you know, you you speak with this certain tone and you, you know, this ⁓ whatever your dialect is, you know, it's it's certain things that you do as far as your communication style. How how important is your communication style when it comes to influence and how you're perceived as a leader? Dr Rita Renee: Right. Yes, communication is very important. Especially because people often respond to how you communicate before they fully process what you're saying, right? People want to know that you care before they care about what you know. So for leaders and entrepreneurs, communication styles, ⁓ it earns you credibility, trust, influence, relationships, opportunities. And you can you can have a strong message, but if you deliver it and it's unclear. Or defensive or it overlays like details, ⁓ inconsistent when people see you on social media, but you're saying one thing and but you're doing another, people may miss the value. So a strong communication style should be clear, like get right to the point. And if you're dealing with me, somebody like me, I have undiagnosed ADHD. You gotta get to the point. ⁓ you have to be confident, ⁓ adaptable, like you have to know your audience, right? And I always say talk to people at a fifth grade level, unless unless you're in the executive room, and sometimes you know you have to use those big words or the acronyms that they use. And then be authentic. Be authentic about who you are, intentional and respectful. Those are the keys with communication, because a strong line of communication, it brings your community together, right? It brings your brand together. And people may forget the the every word that you say, right? But they will remember how you make them feel that experience during that communication. Rashad Thirlkill: That's great. That's a great way to put it. Yeah, definitely. So let's let's speak on ⁓ turning experience into opportunity. Dr Rita Renee: Mm. Rashad Thirlkill: How can someone take the experiences they've accumulated throughout their career in all of those years and transform them into a business, a speaking platform, a book, consulting or coaching opportunity, or maybe a new leadership? Dr Rita Renee: Yeah. All that is is just ⁓ you're taking what you have learned, like through your experience in business or entrepreneurship or just life in general, ⁓ and you build from that. You use those as life lessons and you're intentional about how you create it. For me, ⁓ I do unmute ⁓ your voice, right? Because as a young child, I was muted. by circumstances that happened to me from the age of five to the age of ten, I was molested by my uncle and a female cousin. And so I use those experiences to help other people, whether they're male or female, to deal with the trauma, deal with the pain, but then unmute their voice, no longer being ashamed, use those life experiences not not just to help them heal, but to help others. So we turn a personal lesson into a speaking topic or turning personal expertise into a workshop or service. I remember giving free workshops on ⁓ women in wealth. That's how I got picked up by the news station to go in there once a month. Since the last three years I go on my Carolina and I talk about, you know, finances and business budget tips. Use your experience there, you can you can gain visibility from that. Don't minimize the experience that you have. Turn a challenge That you solved into a framework. Turn your story into content that builds trust, turning your lived experience into a book, program, collaboration, a media opportunity. Your experience becomes an opportunity when you stop seeing it only as something that happened to you and start identifying how you learn to serve someone else from your experience. Rashad Thirlkill: That is a great answer. That is a great answer. Don't look at it as something that happened to you. Look at it look at it as a lesson that can it was learned, but it can be taught. Dr Rita Renee: Mm. Mm-hmm. Yes. Rashad Thirlkill: ⁓ wow, that's that's great. That's great input. What do you think, what has to change internally in a p in a person when when a person moves from being known for their job or job title to being known for their for their expertise? Dr Rita Renee: ⁓ that's a good question. ⁓ first of all, your mindset, because sometimes we get stuck into what other people think too. And so I'll start from the beginning. Number one, I know that you had a past, but your past doesn't identify you as your as your future, right? So you can see yourself. I saw myself as a broken person when I was younger, but as I began to get older, I was like, you know what, I'm more than that. I'm a survivor, I'm an overcomer. And so for other people too, you don't just see yourself as your job. See yourself as that expert, even if it's just your experience. Has nothing to do with a title, has nothing to do with a position. So what can change from a title to identity, people know what you stand for, not just what the position that you held. And if you're going from credit credentials to clarity, instead of ⁓ listing everything that you have done, you clearly communicate who you can help and how you can help them. And if you want to use your experience and you want to change that into visibility, people have to consistently see and hear your ideas. And as much as people hate social media, it can be a blessing and a curse at the same time. But people want to hear your voice, right? Rashad Thirlkill: Definitely. Dr Rita Renee: I can tell people all day and I can create all of these images on social media that I, you know, I'm a voice strategist. I can help you unmute. But if I'm not articulating that clearly, and if they don't hear my voice, if they don't see me teaching in a workshop or on a platform, then it's a mute decision it's it's a mute point. If your mouth is closed, your business is closed, and so is your visibility. Rashad Thirlkill: If your mouth is closed, so is your business, so is your visibility. That is a framework within itself. Dr Rita Renee: Yes. Ha ha Rashad Thirlkill: So I want to dig into that. With what it is that with with what you do and what you teach, is there a specific framework? And is there something that you wake up to every day and you realize that I have to be visible? Dr Rita Renee: Mm. Yes. I I would just want to call ⁓ talking with a young lady about this too. And I use the own method, right? The own method is O W N. You have to own it, you have to word it, and you have to name that moment. So with the own it part, you have to be clear about your expertise, your experiences, your values, the problems that you are equipped to solve. And stop hiding behind the title. Stop, don't worry about that. People want to know, can you solve my issue? So you just own it and don't hesitate about it. Like I I know who I am. My name is Dr. Rita Renee. I'm the ultimate powerhouse coach. I help people with trauma come out of the shadows off the sideline and on stages to share their story unapologetically and with authority. That's who I am. And so you own that no matter I don't care if it's a thousand people that coach. There's only one, Dr. Rita Renee. Then you word it. You learn how to clearly communicate your values so that people understand what you do, who you help, and why it matters. It matters for me that people share their story because there's healing not only for themselves but for other people. I think we have been given a voice and we have to be great stewards of it. And it's not fair to keep that to yourself. And then finally, name the moment. Recognize that. When and where to speak is very important. Contribute, share your perspective. If there's a if you even if you have a different opinion than anybody else's, that's your voice. Don't let anybody mute it. And position yourself for the right opportunities. People don't know that you can help them if your mouth is closed. So that's why it's so it's so important to own it. A title may give you a position, but your ownership, your words and your identity. It gives you the ability to recognize the moment you are needed and known in the room. Rashad Thirlkill: Okay, so I have to add to this, and I'm gonna add something I normally add at the end of the show, but we're rolling right now, so let's continue. What would you give? What advice would you give someone who wants to be maybe starting out as a coach and wants to get in front of rooms, haven't really got in front of rooms, but want to get in front of rooms, and what are the proper steps that they should take to say, I want to own this, and like you said, get in front of rooms? Dr Rita Renee: Ha. Rashad Thirlkill: What's that shit? Dr Rita Renee: So a lot of people think that they need a great big room before they even start it, right? They start talking. That's not true. Even if you're in a meeting, take that one step, that one courageous step to say, I'm gonna share my opinion. I'm gonna share my perspective. I'm gonna use my voice and I'm gonna recommend something. That's all you do, whether it's with your family, you can start with your family, you can start with the organization, corporation. Meeting one or two people. It doesn't matter. You can share it with yourself in the mirror. Okay? If we got to start that small. But you have to open up your mouth. And that's the first thing. The second thing is stop waiting for somebody to invite you to their platform. Create your own phone platform. Build your own table. That's what happened to me. I moved to this area, didn't know anybody. And then after 2020, everything got shut down. And when it opened back up, I said, you know what? I need to meet other women. And so I'm going to create a lunch and learn. I got my little snacks. It was only an hour. And what I did was I invited people to my platform. I didn't know them. Gave them a place to speak and have a voice. And that's how I started. Collaboration. That's the second thing. You don't have to do it by yourself, collaborate. That's what got me out there with other people and knowing other organizations and being seen because I didn't try to do it on my own. And the third thing is it is to ask for help. One of the greatest things that I've learned and I went to this ⁓ workshop, the lady said, What is the main thing that's stopping you? And they say a lot of people is asking for help for so for ever since then, that was three years ago, I was like, Can you help me? ⁓ How do I get to this place to be on this platform? What kind of work that I need to do for myself to prepare myself? Because a lot of people, while you evolving, while you becoming the woman or the man or the entrepreneur or the business person that you want to be, work on yourself. And last thing I would say stop waiting to be perfect to do it. Just do it. Do like Mike, just do it. Rashad Thirlkill: right that's right ⁓ man those are such good those are such good jewels such good gems i i think ⁓ i i agree with you i i i come from a background of entertainment and music i love music and i've always been of the thought that if you're a creative just create Dr Rita Renee: Mm. Rashad Thirlkill: There's gonna be someone who who latches on to what it is that you do. Just create and put it out there. It's for the world to decide. If there's gonna be someone, you look in the back of a room that's bothering. Dr Rita Renee: Absolutely. Absolutely. And I think people don't get started because they think that they have to have a large following. We talked about that. And then they don't want to be disappointed. ⁓ I remember starting a Facebook group. I had it was just me and then it was just one other person. And now the group and I I know it's it may be small to other people, but this group been riding with me since 2010, and it's almost 230 of them in there. Okay. But I just I just what's consistent. And I just continue I just want to encourage anybody that's listen listening, just take the first step. And you people are watching, whether you know that or not, whether they like your post or not, whether they follow you or not, they are watching, but they're looking for authenticity and they're looking to see if you're going to be consistent. Because there are people that are looking for voices that are out there and it it may not be mine. It may not be Rashad. It may not be mine, but it may be yours and you can help them. Rashad Thirlkill: That's right. Consistency is key. And content is key. Dr Rita Renee: Yes. Yes, I love it. Rashad Thirlkill: Definitely. Let's get into your TED X talks. So you've been in on TEDx two times, and that is that's man, that's that's huge. ⁓ what does standing on that stage teach you about communicating an idea versus simply communicating information? Dr Rita Renee: Okay. Yes, sir. Yes, when you communicate a idea, you have to understand a couple of things. Number one, that idea is not just ⁓ about your story. It's also to connect with the audience and to make a lasting impact on them. They're not gonna remember every word they say, but they may remember that drop the mic moment, right? That that connected with them. And that's the other thing. It's all about connecting with the audience. You don't have to memorize every line. Matter of fact, they don't know if you meant to say the first section of your speech versus the last and the last versus the first. Nobody knows that. ⁓ but they're looking for that connection with you as that human being on there. How can you help me? How can you let me see this idea in a different way? How can it expand and impact my life? And what it taught me was this. ⁓ you can do anything if you put your mind to it. You don't need a degree, you don't need to be in a certain position. all you need is a willingness to be able to be taught. With all the education I had, I had to humble myself and I had to submit to someone coaching me and teaching me. And being on that platform also is a great responsibility. Is some people Unfortunately, they take it for granted and they just feel like they can just will it nilly it and just but what gave me the most gratification was when I got off of that stage, men and women said that it can relate to what I was talking about. And with my first TEDx from belonging, moving past boxes to belonging, rethinking DEI and reclaiming excellence. I had several people coming up to me. One person was actually doing their doctorate degree on DEI. She said, You made me see it a different way. You made me approach it a different way. I was thinking one way, but you let me see something a different way because I'm like, it shouldn't be about boxes. It should be about does that person belong there? And if they don't, what can we do to help support them? But they have to also want to be trained so they can belong in the places that they want to be in, as far as leadership or whatever it is. ⁓ and then the second one I did was the price of feeling wanted and just being in a place where you always trying to please people and never being authentic to who you've been called to be. Again, it's a great place to share your ideas and just have people think a different way. And being vulnerable. That's the other thing. ⁓ being vulnerable, knowing what to share, what not to share. And just allowing the I allowed my heart to lead, but also knew that this was a responsibility that I had a ⁓ whatever I say is gonna be on social media forever. It's not gonna go away. It's not gonna go away. So I'm grateful for the opportunity. I did too. I don't think I'll ever do another one again. It was a lot of hard work. It's not as simple as people think it is, but they make it look good in the end. So just so everybody knows, if you do a TEDx and if all you have to do is pause, if you mess up, just pause. They cut all that stuff out. Rashad Thirlkill: ⁓ wow. ⁓ wow. Dr Rita Renee: Yeah. Yeah. So they make everybody look good. I'm grateful. I didn't have to I didn't mess up in either one of mine, but there were a couple of people and it happens, right? ⁓ it happens. But they edit all that out and make it look perfect. Rashad Thirlkill: Something I didn't know that they do edits. Okay. ⁓ wow. How important is storytelling when you decide to be an expert? When you decide, I know at the beginning of this, you said that you know you had been through some things, and that's kind of you know, you're putting it out there, and your story is maybe someone else's story, it may be the way you relate to someone else. Dr Rita Renee: Mm-hmm. Mm. Rashad Thirlkill: How important is storytelling when it comes to being a leader, when it comes to being a speaker? Dr Rita Renee: Yeah, absolutely. Because you know, people they may understand your information, but they usually remember the story that help the information make sense. So for leaders and entrepreneurs and coaches and speakers, storytelling can help you like build trust faster. It makes your message easier to remember, creates emotional connection. It shows why your work matters. It can help people. see themselves in the message and turn your expertise into something that's relatable. So create ⁓ opportunities for people to reach out to you for your services and they can also see the value. But facts can kind of keep people informed, but stories help people connect and remember and then also take action. Rashad Thirlkill: Got it. Awesome. So Dr. Rita, I'm going to take you into the rabbit fire section now. All right. So you can answer this. well you it I'll give you a command and ⁓ it's either one word or one sentence. Okay? All right. Okay. So Dr Rita Renee: ⁓ here we go. Okay. Okay. I'm ready. Rashad Thirlkill: One word that describes powerful leadership. Dr Rita Renee: Ooh. I will say sharing. Rashad Thirlkill: One communication habit everyone should eliminate. Dr Rita Renee: Over talking someone else. Rashad Thirlkill: One communication habit everyone should adopt. Dr Rita Renee: Absolutely listen before speaking. Rashad Thirlkill: Best advice you've ever received. Dr Rita Renee: The best advice I received I remember from an elder and he said, Whatever you do, do it unto the Lord. So that means if somebody messes up or they make you mad, make sure you remember why you're doing it. Rashad Thirlkill: Biggest lesson from your biggest failure. Dr Rita Renee: Don't quit. Rashad Thirlkill: One book every leader should read. Dr Rita Renee: ⁓ I'm gonna share this book. Powerhouse Speaker Unmute. Rashad Thirlkill: One thing successful people don't talk about enough. Dr Rita Renee: They're failures. Rashad Thirlkill: What does wealth mean to you beyond money? Dr Rita Renee: Peace. Rashad Thirlkill: What should people stop apologizing for? Dr Rita Renee: Their opinions. Rashad Thirlkill: Finish this sentence. Your voice becomes powerful when Dr Rita Renee: You unmute. Rashad Thirlkill: All right, okay, you knocked that out the park. Okay. All right. That was awesome. So Dr. Rita Vene, if someone listening today knows they have more to contribute, more to say, and more impact to make, but they've been waiting for the right time, what would you tell them? Dr Rita Renee: Don't wait anymore. You tomorrow's not promised to us. And so the way to make an impact is to make an impact and just move and use your voice now. There's so many people that's waiting on it. And you'd be so surprised how it's also gonna help you make an impact in your life as well, not only professionally, but personally as well. Rashad Thirlkill: And if people want to learn more about you or work with you or follow your work, where should they go? Dr Rita Renee: All platforms at Dr. Rita Renee Rashad Thirlkill: All platforms at Dr. Reader Vene, we're talking LinkedIn, we're talking Instagram, Facebook. Dr Rita Renee: Yes. Everything. Website. Rashad Thirlkill: Okay, that's Renee with two E's. No no apostrophes. Dr Rita Renee: Yes. No apostrophes. Rashad Thirlkill: All right. Okay. Well, Dr. Rit Rita, I want to thank you so much for coming on. ⁓ your answers were so on point. Like when I talk about professionalism and when I speak to professionals and experts, you know, it's a conversation to where you know that a person knows their stuff. And that's what type of conversation that we just had. So for anyone out there listening, we already know Dr. Rita Renee is on top of her game. Dr Rita Renee: Thank you. Rashad Thirlkill: Give her a follow. Is there anything that you want to leave us with, doctor Rita Bene? Dr Rita Renee: Your story gets attention once you unmute your voice and you don't need permission to do that. Rashad Thirlkill: Don't need permission. You can you can start anywhere, like she said, you can start in the mirror telling yourself your story and just expand from there. Best advice I've ever heard. Hey, listen, everybody knows out there we're going to continue to live by our motto. I want to thank you very much, Dr. Rita, for coming on today. And to all you listeners, continue to make money, make moves, and make meaningful memories. Until next time, we'll see you later. Dr Rita Renee: Absolutely.