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Hilary DeCesare - RELAUNCH: Spark Your Heart to Ignite Your Life · Vox Novus with Victor Fuhrman

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Vox Novus The New Voice, Vox Novus, the New Dimension, Vox Novus
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thought and movement leaders who will share from their experience and offer tools to help
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us navigate our rapidly changing world. My name is Victor Fermont. Welcome to
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vox Novus, The New Voice. How can women turn transition into transformation?
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My guest this week on vox Novus. Award winning entrepreneur Hillary Deceasar says women
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facing midlife may use her three HQ method to relaunch their lives. Hillary Deceasar
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is a three time international bestseller, successful Silicon Valley entrepreneur, and featured on
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the reality show Secret Millionaire. She teaches women to combine their head, heart
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and higher self to create new brain patterns that shed limiting beliefs to reveal an
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authentic, satisfying self image that leads to success at home, at work,
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and in relationships. Her website is the relaunchco dot com, and she joins
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me this week to share her personal story and latest book, Relaunch Spark your
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Heart to Ignite your Life. Please join me in welcoming to Voxdovis. Hillary
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Diseasar, Welcome, Hillary, Victor, are so great to be here and
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if it's anything like we were just talking offline. Oh my gosh, this
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is going to be an amazing, amazing show. Absolutely, Hillary, please
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share with our lists your early path and how it shaped your life and callings.
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Well, it was. It's really interesting because it seems it's all U
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over the last five years come to a head. When I was little,
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when I was about two, I did have a near death experience. I
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was I was really super sick for about six months and in and out of
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the hospital. Again, you know, this little two year old don't really
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I can't really say I remember a lot of it, and as I grew
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up, I didn't really realize I'm the significance of it, because when you
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can't logically consciously remember something, but let me tell you, it started to
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or it roure it's head. And it was also something it wasn't a discussion
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we talked about because my mom um during those times was actually accused with causing
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me to be sick. We further learned that I was one of the first
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cases of shigela in California and they hadn't seen it. They didn't know what
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it was. So I would go to the hospital. They would you know,
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I would get better than they would, you know, lease me.
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I would go back home with my mom and I would end up getting sick
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again, and then she'd put me back in And this repeated so many times
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that the night that I did have that near death experience, they would not
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let my mom stay in the room with me, and they made her go
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and kind of sit down. So she was down in the cafeteria with my
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grandmother having a cup of coffee. This part of the story I do know.
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And the nurse came down and said, you know, we really you
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need to come back up. Hillary is not going to make it tonight,
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and you know, I think it's time that we have a decision to be
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made and either blast her with a tremendous amount of antibiotics which could very well
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kill her, or we'll see what happens. And they had to make that
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decision. My dad was an orthopedic surgeon and he was at that point in
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residency, so he was not there, so my mom had to make this
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very heavy decision. And fortunately we are here today because I'm talking to you.
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But it was really interesting. Um. As I grew up, I
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had this very strange sixth sense. I had this intuition that would always like
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I'd be like, how do I know that? How do I how how
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can I read somebody so well? And and I didn't. I didn't know.
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And so one day I was feeling like in my in my generation,
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it was the um, if we can just have a laugh a bit here,
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remember that commercial? Um, I think it's July. It's like I
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can bring home the base bacon, I can fry it up in a pan
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and then never let you forget you're a man. And the song like came
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to me and I'm like, what the heck? Like what is this?
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And I went and I googled it and for all of you out there,
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you have to do this. It is the most ridiculous thing. I mean,
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this woman at the end is in a full ball gown, you know,
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with her frying pan. And I thought, what's going on here with
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this concept? Because it was you know, soon after Helen ready Is you
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know, put out her song I Am Woman, hear me Roar, and
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it was my It resonated with me so much that it became literally I have
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it up on my wall as my as my kind of manifesto. And I
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thought like, what what am I supposed to be doing. I got into
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a very man's world in the Silicon Valley high tech oracle. For almost ten
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years, I went out and started to coach entrepreneurs that had received venture capital
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funding. I was just like going, going, driving, driving, hitting
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all of the levels that I thought were success, and I kept feeling very
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void. I kept feeling something was missing. And one day I was with
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my mom and she handed me a book Many Minds, Many Masters, and
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I read it and I looked at my mom, like, Mom, You've
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never talked anything about any of this. I've felt like everything that I read,
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I'm like, oh, But I said, I said, what's going
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on, Like why haven't you ever? I mean, why are you giving
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me this? And she said, you're ready, You're ready to really embrace
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this. Well, I kind of I embraced it for a short term,
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and then I stopped and I got again back into the grind. I got,
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you know, married, and had my three kids, and then I
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was going through a divorce and I had these three young kids. I had
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this business that I was out raising money, raising millions and millions of dollars,
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feeling the grind, and I literally just collapsed. I collapsed in my
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mom's house. I remember it was the smallest twin bed I've ever been on.
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And I'm a I'm a small, petite woman and this bed was small.
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And she comes in and again hands me a book that had just come
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out called The Secret. And I'm going to stop there because i feel like
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I've been loved. But this is your question. So I do so many
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business like hardcore business conversations that this is really like lighting me up right now.
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Absolutely, your mother was known as juju Ah. You was your inspiration,
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wasn't she. Yeah, she was my best friend, my rock and
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again, you know, always giving me what I needed at that exact moment
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and no sooner, right, isn't that the case? We always say,
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like, you know, gosh, why didn't you do this earlier? Well,
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I wasn't ready. And when it finally happens, when the universe steps
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in, it was that, you know. And I laugh now because people
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are like, oh, you know the secret of I'm like, you know,
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there's so much power in the law of attraction, the law of resonance
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and elevating your energy. And mom when she in just just to back up
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for one sack, my grandmother, my great grandmother, my great great grandmother
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all lived into their early hundreds, and I just assumed my identity was that
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when I hit fifty, I was I was at literally the mid the mid
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mid zone of my life. I thought that was middle you know, midlife,
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and not that I was having a midlife crisis, because I was very
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confident in my identity that I'm going to live until my you know, I'm
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at least a hundred, and I have so much time. I have so
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much time. Time is endless. Time is like I can do that or
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I can you know, I can eat this. It doesn't matter. I'm
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just gonna live forever. And then four days after my fiftieth birthday, my
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mom calls me with the call and she her voice was just void of any
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emotion. And normally my mom, as you called her, Juju Bean Juju
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was always a light, the ray of light. And she said, Hilary,
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they found thirteen lesions and I have colon cancer stage four. And I
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remember the guttural, the guttural sound that came from within me, like it
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wasn't even possible. This woman grew up with a doctor as a dad,
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a doctor as a husband, and I'm like, Mom, you go to
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every single doctor's pointment like what are you even saying? And she had done
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a colonography instead of a colonoscope, and it just it was missed. It
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was plain all missed. And so it was a time in my life where
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as we talked a little earlier with the loss of your wife, my mom
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passed with me holding her hand in October of twenty nineteen, and as we
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all know, March fifteenth in San Francisco became our lockdown, and I had
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no opportunity. At that point. I thought, without knowing what was about
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to happen, I thought, I need to do an eight prey love Elizabeth
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Gilbert. I just need to get out of here. I just need to
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go travel. I just need to any escape. And then I thought,
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okay, well, if I can't do that, because I still have my
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dance, I'll I'll do a wild and I'll go out and I'll just hike
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and I'll just let everything go. And all of a sudden, I'm I'm
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feeling very trapped in a high rise apartment in San Francisco, and I thought,
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I kept hearing like it's time, it's time to write a book.
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I'm thinking the book I always thought that was inside of me was a book
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about Silicon Valley and the depths of it all and being there as a woman
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in the nineties, and you know, that's what I thought I was going
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to write, and let me tell you that still could be a great book
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in the future. But it wasn't that. It was it was really tapping
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into this concept around relaunch and how we all have the pressures of At that
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point, global relaunches were happening, professional relaunches, personal relaunches, and I
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felt like there needed to be an approach that I had been using very successfully
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with my clients, my one on one clients I've been coaching at that point
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for almost two decades, as well as running multiple companies, and I thought
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I need to share this because I've seen how people have gone from midlife crisis
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to realizing it's an identity crisis, to moving through it and being able to
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really get to that next level. And that's when I went deep inside,
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spent many hours and this this one room looking out at kind of the the
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open, open world out there, thinking I can't even get out there,
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and I came up with the book, and I'm pleased to say that the
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letters I get. I mean the text messages, the um gosh, the
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dms that it's it's remarkable, it's it's my it's my gift that I didn't
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even know I was capable of doing on such a more massive scale to allow
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people to go from where they are the transition. It can be as simple
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as, hey, my business isn't going that great. I've been struggling with
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it. I want to take it to the next level too. Um,
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you know, yet another death just happened my dad, you know, and
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lots of things. Everyone seems to be going through these massive relaunches, and
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it gives you a guideline, it gives you a process, It gives you
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a method to be able to use, to be able to go through it
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to realize that. And I'm going to say it, every single thing the
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universe, God, however you want to label it, is giving you this
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as your lesson. And I promise you there's always a silver lining to everything
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you're going through. And Victor, this is probably the most impactful thing that
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I learned about that I've been doing a podcast called it was called in season
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one, the silver Lined Relaunch, and it's since just changed to the relaunch
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podcast, and I've now done probably eight hundred and eighty recordings, and whether
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it's on the air, whether it's off, I ask, and these are
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incredible, like heartwrenching relaunches. And I'll say, you know, if you
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could go back and be able to change this, not have it happen,
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not have the rape, not have the loss of a significant person in your
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life, not have the massive health, not have you know, being almost
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you know, zipped up. I had one gal zipped up in a body
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bag and realize them that hey, I'm not dead, you know, just
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crazy, crazy relaunches. And I would say, you know, if you
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could go back and change it, would you Not one has ever said yes,
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not one, because we do realize it takes time, that every one
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of these is shaping who we are. And that's why I love your story,
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Victor so much, because you're where you are right now as of all
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that relaunches. Absolutely. I had a wonderful blessing of a spiritual teacher in
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the New Seminary back in the nineties who used the expression that everything is unfolding
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in divine order. He used to teach that we may not see it,
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we may not recognize it. We may actually detest what's happening in our lives
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and feel pain from what's happening in our lives, but when we step back
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and re examine it postense, we know that there was a reason for that
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being taking place, absolutely champing who we are and what we become because of
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that experience. That is so true. I mean, if you really think
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about that, if everything, and I grew up with a household, my
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dad, my mom, and they were divorced when I was five, and
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they were you know, it's pretty much like, hey, put on a
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happy you know, there's no there's no room for somebody to not be happy.
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And I would, and I got really good at it, and I
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kept wondering what's wrong with me that I can't be happy all the time.
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That's That's what I believe women struggle with, is that we from when we
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were young, we were you know, we were supposed to be, you
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know, the happy ones. We were supposed to be. Oh, come
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on, you can you know, just just what is it at the table?
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You know, see and you know, be or keep your mouth?
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What was it? I trying to remember exactly what my dad, you know,
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come to the table and you know, children are meant to be seen
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and not heard. A child appolutely yeah, you know, I mean that
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is and then you know, everything is, you know, when you when
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you really get down to it. And and I coach a lot of men
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as as well, and it's interesting. I do a lot a group with
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women and one on one with men. And when you give somebody an opportunity
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to really go back and realize the essence of who they are, who are
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they at their core? Who are they? And I'm right now taking a
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further you know, continue to enhance my own my own knowledge. And we're
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being asked this week to keep a picture of our young self with us at
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all times. And when we have, you know, the judge that's constantly
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self sabotaging us and saying we're not good enough. And I call them bugs
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believes underground surfacing, and we all have bugs. We all have these things.
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They come up and they just beat the heck out of us. But
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it's been interesting keeping this picture. And I'm probably two or three years old.
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It must have been actually must be three, because I'm back to I
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lost half my body when I was in an out of hospital, and I
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look like I got chubby cheeks again, so it must be a round three.
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And I look at this child, and even after going through the trauma
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that was clearly part of that experience, there's just so much happiness. There's
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like it just it lights me up right now to even think about I'm like,
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where's my picture? I should have it? I should wait, I'm
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not doing what I'm supposed to be doing. I should have it right with
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me right now. But I know where it is in the house. But
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it really it's it's take yourself back to that time, because that that inner
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child, that essence of who you are, is one percent inside of you
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and it's all around you. We just build up walls as we go through
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life and try to deal with it. And as Justin Hayward of the Moody
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Blues saying, with the eyes of a child, we must come out and
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see that our world's turning around and through life we will be a small part
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of a whole of a love that exists. With the eyes of a child,
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we will see, Victor, you're good. You have all of these
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nuggets. I love it. Yes, the eyes of a child, And
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you know, sometimes we don't want to look back at our childhood pictures because
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there's a sadness, there's something that we see in ourselves. But if you
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look deep enough and if you go you know the idea of looking in the
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eyes and being able to connect to that that you know, a lot of
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times people have a tough time with inner child, But when you're looking at
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that picture, it's it's so fascinating to me. And I haven't, like
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I said, I haven't just spent hey, here's five seconds. I've spent
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time with this little girl this week and a lot of time, and she's
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starting to she's starting to come out, she's playing again. And I've I've
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noticed that because I've had some very heavy life situations hit me even in the
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last couple of days, and I find that it's nice to know that what
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I share in the Relaunch book, I'm actually living today. I'm living through
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something very, very very significant and not able to talk about it because it's
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not my journey specifically, but I'm I'm leaning heavily into Relaunch and a concept
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that I have in the book three HQ. The HS are headheart, higher
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self, and a lot of times we get into our head that's I think
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we're the image of that, you know, younger child, where you're like,
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oh my god, how how has this happened? How? How has
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it happened that I am where I am today? And your first initial question
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was super interesting. It's you know, how did I get here? And
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it it's a process, and it's really super interesting. About two or three
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years before my mom passed, before my mom not passed, but before um
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she got sick, I was soul searching and I was there was something really
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truly missing that I didn't even I couldn't. I couldn't put it in words,
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but I could feel it. And through this just quiet contemplation daily,
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I ended up calling in by a true miracle, a gentleman that I've since
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been working with for gosh, I think it's now been about basically five years,
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and it's a he's a shaman. He's a spiritual guide for me.
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He's somebody so powerful in his own right and his messaging. And you know,
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when my mom got sick, I thought like, if I hadn't have
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moved my spiritual journey forward, I think about where I would have been that
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day when I got the call that my mom was And fourteen months later she
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did pass but man. She put up a terrific fight and gave me so
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much time to go deep into how I was able to grow spiritually from this
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woman, from this being, from this light source, from what you read
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in the poem about, you know, the the circle of life. When
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we were just initially starting, before we turned it on, it was such
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a beautiful you know, it is a circle life. We all are,
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you know, I believe my mom is here, my dad is here,
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my grandma, my cousin. I mean, all these different beings, all
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these different energy and part of three HQ has a huge component around elevating your
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energy, and we're going to be discussing that in our next segment. My
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guest, Hillary Dissar her book Relaunch Spark Your Heart to Ignite Your Life.
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Hillary, please tell our listeners where they can get your book and find out
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more about you and your amazing work. Oh thank you. You can go
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to Amazon, and you can also go to the relaunch dot com, the
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relaunch dot com. I'm sorry, say what We're time the relaunch dot com
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and we'll be back with more of Hillary after these words. On the Home
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Times Radio Network, The Cutting Edge of Conscious Radio HOMETIMES Radio IOMFM Home Times
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magazine is one of the leading online content providers of positivity, wellness and personal
23:56
empowerment. A philanthropic organization, their net proceeds are funneled to support worldwide charity
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initiatives via Humanity Healing International. Through their commitment to creating community and providing conscious
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content, they aspire to uplift humanity on a global scale. Home Times co
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creating a more conscious lifestyle. Back on box nobis. My guest this week
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is Hillary to caesar her book relaunch, Spark Your Heart to Ignite Your Life,
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Hillary, how may we turn crises into new opportunities? That is I
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believe such an important question for today, especially as I said, we've got
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three different types of relaunches coming at us, and whether we are new news
25:00
readers or TV watchers of news or getting it through the internet or hearing it
25:07
in different mediums. I wanted to want to let everyone know that we all
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are being impacted. And then you've got your professional and there's things that are
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going on in your business. And as we hear you know, recession,
25:25
no recession, what's going to happen? The world is changing? How were
25:27
your business evolved? Those are causing the stressors of the world to come onto
25:34
us. These relaunches are happening, and then you've got personal ones, and
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for parents that have kids, you've got the kids issues that you're trying to
25:45
help them with. For many of us, we had kids that came back
25:48
home and lived with us for a time. For those that have parents that
25:52
they're taking care of during the times we're in right now, it's all just
26:00
coming together. It's like at some point we either you know, it's the
26:04
fight, flight or freeze. And I find more people when I say overwhelm
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underwhelm right, it's like one of the what are you? And we have
26:17
different mechanisms of dealing with this. So in crisis, what I go back
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to, and I mentioned I'm dealing with something right now and I'm leaning so
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heavily into it is a concept called three HQ and Victor, I'd love to
26:33
be able to highlight some of the things so people can actually walk away with
26:38
having at least a pocket tool that they could that they could pull out even
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today. Absolutely, please tell us of three HQ and how it differs from
26:48
IQ and EQ. Well, and if we look back on the seventies,
26:53
the eighties, the nineties, it was all like IQ, how intelligent,
26:59
what's your problem solving capabilities? And in many regards, even in leaderships,
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you know positions that you had to have this like IQ, Oh gosh,
27:08
you know the degrees and they went there in this and certifications and you know,
27:12
we fall into that trap. And then in the nineties EQ emotional quotient,
27:18
How emotionally connected are you became like, oh, the only way to
27:22
be a good leader is you have to have a high EQ. And it
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was interesting in two thousand and six Cheryl Sandberg, who was the former COO
27:33
of Facebook now Meta, she came out with this concept lean in, and
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for so many it was lean in, get to the table, be you
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know, make your mark, do it now. And I was a follower.
27:49
I was like, yeah, we're going to do it. And what
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happened is I was so leading with my head. Oh so I gotta do
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this, I gotta do this, I gotta make this happen. It's got
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to happen now. I was causing so much stress on myself that I was
28:03
actually making myself sick. And at that point I'm having I remember I was
28:07
having twins and I was told, hey, there's a somebody who's I was
28:11
literally out of maternity leave for about a week out and I had my two
28:15
little babies in my arms, and I was told, oh, well you
28:19
have a new manager when you come back. And I thought to myself,
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well, wait a second, Well I didn't even know there was a position.
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And this person said, well, you know, of course you don't
28:29
want it. It's you've got babies, like you don't want that. And
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it was at this point I'm like, well, wait a second, Like
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huh, I am very interested. I want to go for this job.
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Well we've already given it to this guy, and you know, and I
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it's something that caused me to start to really think about where are we and
28:51
where are we going and these things that society puts on us, the struggles
28:56
at society, you know, the labels that society puts on you know,
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iq, EQ, lean and do this, do that. And I thought,
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what's at the base of success and what is a lifestyle of success and
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what does it really mean to each and every person, which I believe is
29:15
unique and different to each and every one of us. So to define success
29:21
by anyone else, you're missing this huge ability to embrace your own excellence and
29:30
So when I started to write the book, and I thought, what have
29:33
I been doing? Well? Like when I've really gotten massive, massive impact
29:40
from somebody I'm working with, What if I have to net it out?
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What do I do? And these people are paying me ridiculous amounts of money
29:48
and they're you know, the highest level in all the different areas, and
29:52
what makes it so impactful? And I did? I thought, you know,
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it's three h Let's get out of your head and tap into your heart,
30:06
your emotional center, so that when your head and your heart are working
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together, it's then that you can access your higher self. And what's the
30:19
higher self? To me, it's your best version of you. It's when
30:25
you're in alignment, when things are flowing, when you are listening to your
30:30
intuition, you're not just hearing it, but you're taking action around it.
30:38
And when you put all of these together, the head, the heart,
30:42
the higher self, it is the most incredible experience that you can have.
30:49
Now, people say, well, or is the goal to try to be
30:55
in that higher self level at all times? And I'm I'm sitting here right
31:02
now saying not at all. Because we're human beings and life is going to
31:07
bring you another relaunch. Whether it's today or tomorrow, or a month or
31:11
a year or the future, you're going to get it. And there's going
31:15
to be an ultimate one at the end where a lot of others are going
31:19
to have to relaunch based on your evolving to the next level. But this
31:26
is something that we can capture now, and it's based around an energy.
31:32
It's based around your higher self. When you're operating at that you're operating at
31:37
a higher level. And there's a vibration chart, the Hurts chart that talks
31:42
about emotions have a vibration and we know this to be true scientifically, and
31:48
I'm a science neuroscience, spiritual kind of like, let's bring them all together.
31:57
And this is what I came up with that when you can elevate your
32:04
energy even to a very quick hit, to elevate your energy from a sadness,
32:14
despair, shame, blame which is a very low frequency, and be
32:19
able to pop yourself to a higher level quickly, almost virtually instantaneously. If
32:28
you can do that enough, it's like a muscle. You don't go into
32:31
the gym and start to lift heavy weight to build up will this concept and
32:38
I call it, you know it's the first step of three HQ. I
32:42
call it tune in. Tune in allows you have those quick hits that allows
32:46
you to get through the day. It allows you to bring your best energy
32:52
to anything you are going to be working on through the day, whether it's
32:57
something at work, or whether it's an emotional crisis, or whether it's something
33:04
that you feel that you need from your own internal self. And so three
33:08
HQ is a complete framework, and you can use it for work, you
33:15
could use it personally, you can use it at any time. There's a
33:20
longer process that I talk about when I said bugs, your beliefs, underground
33:25
surfacing. We all have these bugs, these limiting beliefs, these things that
33:30
hold us back from that higher self, from that success that we that we
33:37
are dreaming of or that we're trying to create. But that's long term,
33:44
and I find sometimes in today's world, you just need a quick hit,
33:49
You just need a silver bullet, You just need that, Like, ah,
33:52
what can I do right this second? So Victor, could I take
33:59
you through the tune in process, which is a four step process, super
34:04
easy, but it does take a couple of minutes, absolutely, And I
34:08
just want to share with you that I'm one hundred percent on the same page
34:12
with you. I agree with you completely. So what's the threat? Ah,
34:15
Okay, Victor, I'm going to ask you to be a little vulnerable,
34:16
which I know you don't have a problem with. But again, three
34:21
HQ can sometimes feel like, uh, it's daunting. There's processes that could
34:25
take a little bit more time. And I always like to give people something
34:30
that they can do literally right now. So if you're sitting in a place
34:36
that you can actually do this, do this with us. If you're driving,
34:39
or if you're in a place that you know, hey, listen to
34:43
this later, go back, you know, and catch it again. I
34:46
have people that record it and then you know, listen over and over.
34:50
But this is the process four steps, and it's called tune in and again
34:54
it's about elevating your energy. So Step one is when you can think about
35:00
something Victor, that is currently a challenge in your life that you really would
35:07
like to figure out. What's the next step, Like, what can I
35:12
do this challenge is? Really it could be at work, it could be
35:15
personal. Do you have something that you're kind of like, yeah, how
35:20
come this isn't working for me? Right now? What's going on. Do
35:22
you have something like that. Yes, there is a challenge. I'm not
35:25
going to go into details, obviously, but they do have a challenge apsolute
35:29
is it? Is it business related or personal? Personal? Okay, So
35:34
what I want to make sure of that we always talk about is, you
35:38
know, there was a quote that I've heard for years and years and it
35:43
took me a long time to figure it out, and this will help everyone
35:47
truly figure it out. Einstein said, you can't solve a problem at the
35:52
consciousness it was created. You can't solve a problem at the consciousness it was
35:58
created the consciousness level. And so what we want to do with tune in
36:02
when you're not able to move through something, when you have a challenge,
36:08
it means that we have to elevate ourselves to a higher level, a higher
36:14
energy, so that we're looking at it differently. We're looking at it not
36:20
at the level it was created, or you'd be able to solve it right
36:22
now, but a higher level. So in step two, what I like
36:28
to do is you have your challenge, you have it, you're thinking about
36:31
it. In step two, I want you to tune in to a song,
36:37
a song that truly lights you up. That when you hear it,
36:42
Victor, you can't help but tap your foot, You can't help but move
36:45
your body. You can't help but feel emotionally starting to get charged. You
36:52
have a song. It doesn't have to be your favorite song. It could
36:54
be a song that oh my God, just comes to you or that you
36:58
have to go and think about. But is there a song that when you
37:00
hear it, you're like, oh, this is so good. I can't
37:06
be at a negative energy, at a lower energy level when I hear it?
37:08
Is there? Absolutely? Can you share with us the song? Absolutely?
37:13
The song is called Question that was performed written by the Justin Hayward performed
37:17
by the Moody Blues. Oooh okay, so good. So I want you
37:23
in a thirty second. I want you to hear it. And some people
37:28
will say, does it have to be playing? Can you hear it?
37:31
You can do either. You can play it on your phone, turn it
37:35
on, listen to thirty seconds of it, absorbing it literally having that wave
37:42
of song go from your head all the way to your toes, start to
37:45
change your state by moving your body, and if you're listening to it in
37:50
your head, I want you Victor right now, since I know you are.
37:53
Turn it up. Tune in and turn it up and start to move
37:59
your body. Okay, absolutely, And are you feeling this right now?
38:05
Are you feeling the song within you? Okay? It became my personal anthem
38:08
the first time I heard it. Oh gosh, I love that is so
38:13
great. As I mentioned by Helen Ready, I am woman. I mean
38:16
I hear that and I can't help it elevate myself. So now we're going
38:22
to go into step three and I'm going to ask you repeatedly to tune in
38:27
again to that song right tune into it. And I want you to think
38:31
about your challenge, your personal challenge that's going on right now for you.
38:37
And if you could visualize right now, as you're thinking about what you really
38:44
want to have happened with this personal relaunch challenge, what what would that look
38:51
like? And you're going to close your eyes visualize this as the most amazing
38:58
outcome for you, all right. And as you're looking at that, as
39:02
you're visualizing it, I want you to pick up on a color and I
39:07
want you to make that color even brighter, more dynamic, illuminate it.
39:14
What what color is capturing your eyes right now? Are radiant violet. M
39:21
Okay, so this violet you're going and you're going all in. It's getting
39:23
it's getting deeper and richer and more beautiful. And now I'm going to do
39:29
something that's neuro based, and I'm going to ask you to do three things
39:35
in a row. I'm going to ask you to open your eyes and then
39:37
shut them. When I say the word click, that will be your anchor
39:42
to open your eyes and shut your eyes. You are not focusing on anything
39:46
outside. You're actually focusing on the internal image. You are taking a photo
39:52
at internal photo of what you're going for. So are you ready to go
39:59
through click and closing your eyes quickly? I am ready? Click click,
40:07
click, All right, do you have that picture? Can you very quickly
40:13
break that picture up in your mind? Yes? This is like your photo
40:15
album of your own of your own beautiful future. Okay. Now in step
40:22
four, I want you to tune in again, tune into that song.
40:24
You have that image, and I want to ask you what is the one
40:30
thing that you could do right now to create momentum, to create momentum around
40:37
that picture, that image that you've captured in your mind. You don't have
40:40
to say it, but when you have that one thing that you've identified and
40:46
if it's struggle, if for those out there doing it, tune in again,
40:51
elevate yourself. Then ask yourself the same question, what do I need
40:54
to do? What is the smallest thing to create momentum towards that image?
41:01
When you have that first step for momentum, let me know I haven't.
41:07
Okay, So that completes the process that is the tune in process. But
41:13
what's so incredible is that from now on, as you go through, as
41:17
you feel like, wait, I need to tune in again, I need
41:21
to tune back in. You can build your photo album. You have the
41:25
cover picture, but you're going to add more to it. You're going to
41:30
keep creating. And as you know that when it takes up more of your
41:36
energy and it becomes an energy drain, this challenge you've got, it means
41:39
that you need to be tuning in more and getting yourself elevated more. So
41:45
you can do this at any time. I've got people that call me and
41:49
say, I'm about to do a social media post and I'm going to tune
41:52
in right this second before I came onto your show. I tuned in before
41:58
I go on a stage tune in and it doesn't have to be necessarily the
42:02
challenge. But when I think about when I'm going on to a podcast,
42:07
I think about, you know, how do I want to inspire people?
42:10
And that's what I ask what do they need to hear? And my tune
42:14
in process works for inspiration, it works for challenges, it works for you
42:22
know, what are you trying to create in your life and elevating yourself All
42:29
the time, I have people doing this twenty five thirty times. They just
42:31
it's an automatic. They're doing it all the time. Now it's your pocket,
42:37
it's your pocket part, it's your tune in process, and you can
42:39
pull it out. You talk about a coach, this is the best coach
42:43
you've gotten. I got into your back pocket. Awesome, the awesome work
42:46
and wisdom of Hilary Deceasar or book relaunch Spark your Heart to Ignite your life.
42:52
Will be back with more after these words on the Own Times Radio network.
42:58
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the AD Council. Back on box novis my guest this week, Hillary to
46:19
Caesar her book Relaunch Spark Your Heart to Ignite Your Life. Hillary. In
46:24
my forty four year business career, I trained industrial salespeople and shared two concepts
46:30
that were integral to my personal success. The first was to identify what the
46:36
customer really wanted rather than going for a quick sale, earning and growing their
46:40
trust and business. And the second was taking ownership of customer satisfaction. I
46:46
used to say that ownership. If you take away the W and the R,
46:50
it says one ship, the one ship we all sail on, or
46:52
sincon together. What do you say to business people? Who don't know how
46:57
to approach these things. Oh okay, just what you just said was so
47:00
powerful. I mean, it is more people. It's the blame, it's
47:08
the shame, it's the it's always this isn't, this isn't. This is
47:15
happening because of them, because of of what's happening on the exterior. And
47:21
I always talk about visible versus invisible, and we are so caught up in
47:28
the visible that we forget you have to go and become invisible first so that
47:34
the visible shows up. And when you stop focusing on the actual sale,
47:43
on the dollar amount, and you focus on the impact, you focus on
47:50
the ownership that you own, on how you're leading the journey of your of
47:58
whatever you're trying to put out there, whether it's you know, in the
48:01
tech space, or whether you're an entrepreneur, service provider, or whether you're
48:06
a coach, it's your process. And I feel people get stuck between you
48:14
think, oh, who's my ideal client. Who's my ideal client? And
48:17
Okay, I'm going to give them exactly this is what is going to be.
48:21
You know, this is going to fill their need boom, and then
48:24
you realize, we'll wait a second, they're saying that this is what they
48:31
want, but they're still trying to figure out their own limiting beliefs, their
48:37
own stories. And unless we go deeper and we understand not just the ideal
48:44
client, Oh, they're between this age and they live here, and you
48:47
got to understand, Okay, what's their belief system? Because if we can't
48:53
break that down their belief system to let them even be able to acknowledge,
49:00
right awareness acknowledge, then they can know how great you are. Your message
49:07
is going to fall on deaf ears. So I think what you're you know,
49:10
the two primary areas that you have to focus on one hundred percent.
49:15
It's people I work with sometimes are like, you know, I don't I
49:20
don't want it to be about the money. And I say, okay,
49:22
great, but you're in business for business to be able to have a successful
49:29
business. We can't have you on the streets, not you know, being
49:31
able to support yourself. That's not what's intended. Let's talk about impact and
49:38
if you can make more impact, guess what that's going to mean more money?
49:45
And so focus on the impact and that's when things start to manifest.
49:52
That's when your business literally begins to scale. So yes, I think what
49:58
you're you know, focus, it's kind of it goes against what we normally
50:02
think, right because even as you said you were in, you were in
50:07
the same type of world I was, where you know, what have you
50:09
done for me today? It's your quota, it's the numbers, it's you
50:13
know, oh my gosh, my business is up and down, you know
50:15
roll I call it the relaunched roller coaster. You have one great quarter than
50:19
you're you know, doom and gloom the next, and then you've got another
50:22
one, and you know, it's constantly this this almost you're stressing yourself out
50:28
to set a degree that you're you're not able to get back to the why
50:36
the why around three HQ, I'm going to go back to the heart.
50:39
Part of the massive you know area around the heart when I work with businesses
50:44
is that your business has an emotional part to it as well. And guess
50:51
what your business has bugs. Your business has limiting beliefs that until you get
50:59
past those, you're going to be attracting clients that aren't going to necessarily resonate
51:05
with your ultimate vision of where you're going. And so I always say,
51:09
you know that when you really can get to understanding your avatar, your client,
51:15
your ideal client, and then realizing what fears, what are the you
51:22
know, I've heard recently there are fifty fears, but there are five hundred
51:28
phobias, and I'd say there's even more. I know there are three massive
51:35
queen bees are queen bugs, and those are the need to be loved and
51:40
the fear that we're not loved. The fear of being safe when your business
51:45
is up and down, can't pay the bills, that's safety, and then
51:49
the fear of not being good enough. And everyone of the fears somehow has
51:53
tentacles to your queen bee, those queen bugs, and you're when you can
52:00
figure out your own, that's when you can then understand your client's journey and
52:07
what they're going through, and be able to customers support, support them in
52:15
the most impactful way around delivering your product to them, your service to them,
52:22
in a way that's truly going to take them from the identity that they
52:27
are right now to that identity that you want to create in them. And
52:34
I also took that teaching one step further and said, in a spiritual sense
52:38
that we are customers to one another in life and we have to take ownership
52:43
of customer satisfaction of ourselves and the ones that we love, absolutely customer satisfaction
52:51
of ourselves, those limiting beliefs that are eating us up with self doubt,
53:00
with imposter syndrome. I mean, first and foremost, you know, I
53:05
I there was a there was a point I have to I'm laughing to that,
53:07
just I just thought of this where I I love love. I've always
53:13
loved love that you know the essence of that little girl in the picture loves
53:16
love. And um from a family, you know that you needed to earn
53:23
the love you wanted to be like, I did this, I did that,
53:25
and then while I get love and I decided, um, oh gosh.
53:31
It was probably like maybe five years ago to experience what it would take
53:38
because I've been through divorced and divorced and I have found an absolutely incredible man
53:45
and have found love again and I've been with him now ten years, married
53:50
eight But I thought, oh, you know what I really want to do.
53:52
I want to become a certified matchmaker from the from the New York Institute
54:00
of Matchmaking. And I thought, you know, if you can't love yourself
54:07
completely unapologetically, then how can you attract the right man the right woman into
54:17
your life. So I thought, this is the best business advice I can
54:21
give people is to literally have them become And so I use this and it
54:27
just can't I don't even know why I'm sharing this, but I think it's
54:29
so funny. I want you to become the matchmaker of your own life,
54:36
and that is making sure that you're matching yourself to your ideal client, to
54:42
your ideal prospect, to your ideal self. And so that just what you
54:47
said made me made me remember that, and I'm literally I have the biggest
54:52
smile on my face right now. What would you like readers to take away
54:54
from Relaunch? I'd like them to take away that that they have the power
55:02
source inside of each and every one of them, and you have the ability
55:07
to tap into it. It's like an electric car that is going to the
55:14
charging station, and at any minute, in any part of your day,
55:19
you can tap in charge yourself backup energetically through three HQ and the tune in
55:24
process. This is a gift that you actually already have, the wisdom of
55:31
my guest Hillary to Caesar her book, Relaunch, spark your heart to ignite
55:37
your life, Hillary, one more time, please share with our listeners where
55:40
they can get your book and find out more about you and your amazing work.
55:44
Ah, thank you, thank you. You can get it at Amazon
55:47
relaunch spark your heart to ignite your life, and you can go to the
55:52
relaunch dot com the relaunch dot com. Hillary, You're going to have to
55:57
come back again in a few months and share more of your wisdom with us,
56:00
because this has been absolutely wonderful. It would be my pleasure. I
56:04
absolutely adore you. Ah. This feeling is mutual, and thank you for
56:09
joining us on Box Novis. I'm Victor, the voice Furman of a wonderful week.