Latest / How Hard Can It Be? with Diana Maria Riva / Millennials vs. Gen X: Comparing Notes on Midlife with Francia Raisa & Jessica Marie Garcia

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Millennials vs. Gen X: Comparing Notes on Midlife with Francia Raisa & Jessica Marie Garcia · How Hard Can It Be? with Diana Maria Riva

0:00
Speaker 1: To successfully get through the test of life, one should
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Speaker 1: always compare notes, right? Well, that's what I'm doing today
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Speaker 1: with my two guests. I've got two of my girlfriends
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Speaker 1: from my millennial squad, and we're going to do exactly that.
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Speaker 1: We'll discuss everything from midlife facts versus fiction, finding zen
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Speaker 1: until somebody pisses you off, and from where you are
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Speaker 1: in this moment in life, what message.
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Speaker 2: Do you have for your future self? Really, how hard
0:24
Speaker 2: can it be?
0:24
Speaker 3: Music Welcome to another episode of How Hard Can It Be,
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Speaker 3: a podcast for Gen X women navigating midlife's most fantastic bullshit.
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Speaker 1: I cannot wait for you to dive into this episode
0:41
Speaker 1: with me because I got my millennial babes on here.
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Speaker 1: Some of the hottest, fiercest, most authentically talented women I've
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Speaker 1: come across in this town. And I'm very proud to
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Speaker 1: call them my girlfriends. So first, let me introduce you
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Speaker 1: to someone you all know and have seen for a
0:55
Speaker 1: long time. She made her mark on the Disney hit
0:59
Speaker 1: Liv and Maddie, but then grabbed our attention most fiercely
1:02
Speaker 1: on the critically acclaimed On My Block. And my other guest,
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Speaker 1: you have seen her in many things, but most notably
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Speaker 1: on How I Met Your Father and also the critically
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Speaker 1: acclaimed Grown-ish. Please help me welcome Maddie. Francia Raisa and
1:16
Speaker 1: Jessica Marie Garcia. Oh, wait. Yeah.
1:21
Speaker 2: And I asked them. Drinking is hard.
1:27
Speaker 4: Yeah. Especially when you're older.
1:29
Speaker 1: Listen, every time these bitches say older, I'm going to
1:31
Speaker 1: be like, who are you talking to? Who are you
1:33
Speaker 1: talking to?
1:34
Speaker 2: And this is.
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Speaker 1: Exactly why I wanted to have them on because I
1:36
Speaker 1: want to compare notes. And I reached out to them
1:40
Speaker 1: and said, listen, my millennial hotties, let's talk to this.
1:44
Speaker 1: And I will come in as head of counsel for
1:46
Speaker 1: the Sexy Gen Xs. Brand coming to you soon. And
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Speaker 1: I just want to discuss this. First of all, also,
1:54
Speaker 1: more notably than their work as actors, they are the
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Speaker 1: beloved mamas of Doggy Lola.
2:00
Speaker 4: Yes.
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Speaker 1: And Baby Girl Selena. Their most important roles to date.
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Speaker 2: Am I wrong? Oh, yeah.
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Speaker 4: I'm a single old dog mom and I love it.
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Speaker 2: It's a lot of work. It is a lot of work.
2:10
Speaker 2: Dogs are a lot of work.
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Speaker 4: She was a puppy when I got her and I
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Speaker 4: didn't know that.
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Speaker 2: You didn't know that?
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Speaker 4: She's a rescue.
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Speaker 2: Aw. Best kind. Amazing.
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Speaker 1: I wanted to just discuss where your thoughts are, what
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Speaker 1: you have taken notice of, of this journey of midlife
2:25
Speaker 1: that you are not at. You still have some time,
2:29
Speaker 1: but it's coming.
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Speaker 2: Oh, it's coming.
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Speaker 1: And I want to know if you recognize anything because
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Speaker 1: I think that There are things that are occurring now
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Speaker 1: that we have muscled through that we didn't know and
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Speaker 1: we still may not recognize as, oh, that actually started
2:43
Speaker 1: for me when I was in my late 30s, knocking
2:46
Speaker 1: on 40, whatever. And I still have it because there
2:50
Speaker 1: are so many of us Gen X women who are
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Speaker 1: muscling through these experiences, symptoms, physical or emotional or mental
2:58
Speaker 1: or spiritual, and we don't attribute it to this time.
3:02
Speaker 1: And I thought, well, let's have a conversation and compare notes.
3:04
Speaker 1: So my first thing I want to do as an
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Speaker 1: icebreaker is ask you ladies, what's the worst thing that
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Speaker 1: you've happened, either rumored or scientific, that happens to women
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Speaker 1: in midlife?
3:15
Speaker 2: Night sweats. Night sweats? They're the worst.
3:18
Speaker 1: Do you have them yet? Or are you just saying
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Speaker 1: you've heard about the rumor?
3:21
Speaker 2: Well, no, I've had them. You've had them already?
3:23
Speaker 4: Yeah.
3:24
Speaker 1: And you are not 40?
3:25
Speaker 4: I am not 40.
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Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know.
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Speaker 4: I mean, perimenopause exists, so.
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Speaker 1: That's the conversation here.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, the night sweats. Girl, you know how cold it
3:33
Speaker 4: is on set, right?
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Speaker 2: Yes.
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Speaker 4: I was walking around with ice packs, sweating.
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Speaker 2: Oh, yeah. No, that's not normal. Yeah, no.
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Speaker 4: So I've experienced it and like, oh, I don't want
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Speaker 4: to go through that again.
3:43
Speaker 2: Oh, but you will.
3:44
Speaker 3: I know.
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Speaker 1: Yeah. And by the way, I don't mean to be
3:46
Speaker 1: the Debbie Downer. I'm like, it's coming. No, it's worse
3:48
Speaker 1: than that.
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Speaker 2: No, that's not the truth. But I'm going to be
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Speaker 2: a little bit of that today. But I do like.
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Speaker 1: The fact that you are you're exposing this because I
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Speaker 1: do hope. That a lot of millennials are watching the show.
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Speaker 1: I always say this show is for Gen X, but
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Speaker 1: I say millennials pay attention. This is your destiny. Gen Z,
4:03
Speaker 1: learn and do different.
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Speaker 2: Yeah. Right.
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Speaker 1: Do differently and do better because we're just now getting
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Speaker 1: permission and access to the information.
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Speaker 4: Yeah.
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Speaker 2: We didn't have it when.
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Speaker 1: We were your age because it was being blocked.
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Speaker 2: And kept from us. And that's a whole other episode. Yeah,
4:18
Speaker 2: we can go on that. I can talk about that, too.
4:21
Speaker 2: All day. Yes. So, yes, nice sweats are a thing.
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Speaker 2: What's the worst thing that you've heard happening to us?
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Speaker 2: You know that you dry up like a raisin in
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Speaker 2: your nether regions. That it takes a lot of lubrication
4:32
Speaker 2: to get to the same place. I heard the opposite.
4:34
Speaker 2: You heard the opposite?
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Speaker 4: That, you know, you reach, like, your peak when you're... Someone's.
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Speaker 2: Lying to us. Yeah. So which one is it, Deanna?
4:41
Speaker 2: I mean.
4:43
Speaker 1: And I love that you're asking me when my man's
4:45
Speaker 1: right here.
4:46
Speaker 2: Every Hot Pocket is different. So I feel like some
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Speaker 2: come juicier than others. Do you want to weigh in
4:52
Speaker 2: on this?
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Speaker 1: How.
4:53
Speaker 2: No, no, no, no. What a gentleman. He will not
4:56
Speaker 2: be speaking. Are we getting a sponsor with some kind
5:00
Speaker 2: of lube? Oh, we can do that. Yes, let's do that.
5:03
Speaker 2: You should. Why not?
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Speaker 1: I mean, KY was the brand back in the day.
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Speaker 1: I'm sure there's far prettier brands. I love that.
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Speaker 2: I just put myself in my own hot seat with
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Speaker 2: these questions. You're so hot now, buddy. So how do we,
5:17
Speaker 2: do we want to dive in? You said go as
5:20
Speaker 2: big as you want. And I want to have this discussion.
5:22
Speaker 2: I would not. like to be a California reason in
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Speaker 2: a few years. So please tell me. These bitches, I
5:27
Speaker 2: am sweating now. I'm like, what? She's not so dry anymore,
5:31
Speaker 2: ladies and gentlemen.
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Speaker 4: I mean, if you take enough SSRIs, that happens.
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Speaker 2: What is an SSRI? For anti-depression medicine. Oh, God, we
5:39
Speaker 2: took a turn.
5:40
Speaker 4: Yeah.
5:40
Speaker 2: We took a turn.
5:41
Speaker 4: Well, I'm just saying, you experienced those with that, too.
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Speaker 4: If you want to talk about, you know, growing up.
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Speaker 2: I was happy with our pocket conversation. Okay. So, drying
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Speaker 2: up like a raisin.
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Speaker 4: Yes.
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Speaker 1: Night sweats, yes. On one hand, you're sweating. On the
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Speaker 1: other hand, you're drying up.
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Speaker 2: That is.
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Speaker 1: The fuck-up-edness of midlife. And this is why we all
6:00
Speaker 1: feel bipolar, and we might be. But ultimately, these are
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Speaker 1: the kinds of things that can drive a woman crazy
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Speaker 1: and not know.
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Speaker 2: And you're like, what's happening? I don't understand it. Everything hurts.
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Speaker 1: And none of it makes sense. And I get winded
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Speaker 1: doing nothing. But yeah, that is absolutely the symptoms of
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Speaker 1: either drying up and sex being very painful is one hand.
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Speaker 2: That has not been my case.
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Speaker 1: I'm sorry for all of those in there, but you
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Speaker 1: all signed up for this conversation when you agreed to
6:27
Speaker 1: work on the show. But that is a real thing.
6:31
Speaker 1: And women do need to explore with their, this is
6:33
Speaker 1: the biggest thing, your journey of finding an OBGYN who
6:36
Speaker 1: will walk you through this stage starts now. Meaning like
6:41
Speaker 1: you don't need to visit them tomorrow, but you start
6:43
Speaker 1: your research because this kind of conversation has never once
6:46
Speaker 1: come up in my OBGYN's office with me until I
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Speaker 1: was 52.
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Speaker 2: Wow. And I just turned 57. Where? I know.
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Speaker 1: Honey.
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Speaker 2: Wow.
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Speaker 1: Thank you.
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Speaker 2: That's why it's the sexy Gen X-y. Thank you. Because
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Speaker 2: she looked like this.
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Speaker 4: Yeah.
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Speaker 2: Brand coming to you soon. Yeah.
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Speaker 1: And so had I not changed OBGYNs and found one
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Speaker 1: that would talk to me about these things, because I
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Speaker 1: don't know how to recognize them.
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Speaker 2: I don't know how to label them.
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Speaker 1: And the journey of finding an OBGYN starts with asking
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Speaker 1: your friends, asking your older friends.
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Speaker 2: Because this kind of conversation doesn't come up. You don't
7:22
Speaker 2: know what to look for. You don't know what to expect.
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Speaker 2: You don't know what.
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Speaker 1: You are muscling through, literally, that you shouldn't be. And
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Speaker 1: so those are true facts.
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Speaker 2: Both of those that you brought up are true facts.
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Speaker 1: But then my question to you is, where are you
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Speaker 1: in a mindset of embracing this upcoming chapter? I mean,
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Speaker 1: you have to live presently, but you also have to,
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Speaker 1: I feel like there's so many preemptive things that a
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Speaker 1: person can be doing. Where are you in your daily
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Speaker 1: lives or the way you live? Because you're both career women.
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Speaker 1: You're both mamas. You have responsibilities, relationships. Where are you
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Speaker 1: in your mindset?
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Speaker 2: How do you view it? How do you see it?
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Speaker 4: How do I view getting older?
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Speaker 2: Do you embrace it?
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Speaker 1: Do you embrace this chapter, like the idea of the chapter?
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Speaker 2: Yeah, I do now. Or do you fear it? I
8:09
Speaker 2: do now.
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Speaker 4: I've embraced it and I'm actually, so I just turned 38.
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Speaker 2: Where? I don't know. No, not here.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, not here. Not here.
8:17
Speaker 1: By the way, I loved your post because you post,
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Speaker 1: you say, thank you mom and dad for not making
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Speaker 1: me not look like I'm in my thirties.
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Speaker 2: What?
8:23
Speaker 1: I'm like, yes. Yeah.
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Speaker 2: I don't know. God said, bless.
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Speaker 4: I've been through so much trauma in my life that,
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Speaker 4: you know, it's the least that life could have given me,
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Speaker 4: but now I'm embracing it. Like I'm really looking forward
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Speaker 4: to 40. I feel like I'm you know, planting seeds.
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Speaker 4: And I'm learning a lot in my late 30s. I'm
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Speaker 4: planting seeds. I have focused more on my health than
8:40
Speaker 4: I ever have before. So I can embrace this journey
8:44
Speaker 4: that I'm on. And I mean, I've been going through
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Speaker 4: a lot of changes. It's just in my body, in
8:50
Speaker 4: my life. And rather than fighting it and crying, which
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Speaker 4: I do cry, it's normal, but I'm, you know, accepting.
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Speaker 4: And I think that's the difference. Before I wasn't accepting,
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Speaker 4: I was trying to control it. And now I just
9:02
Speaker 4: let life guide me wherever it's supposed to guide me.
9:04
Speaker 4: And And I was telling them earlier, if you just
9:06
Speaker 4: kind of pay attention, you know, it gives you signs like,
9:09
Speaker 4: you know, the day before I moved, there was a cocoon,
9:12
Speaker 4: a butterfly cocoon that showed up in my backyard. And
9:14
Speaker 4: then when on my birthday in my new place, my
9:18
Speaker 4: cousin brought me flowers and she found a butterfly with
9:21
Speaker 4: a broken wing, but it was still alive. And it
9:23
Speaker 4: came to me and I said, oh, wow, the cocoon
9:26
Speaker 4: and then the butterfly, like, you know, metamorphosis of it.
9:29
Speaker 4: And then two nights ago, I saw at night. I
9:31
Speaker 4: saw a ladybug on my back door, and I don't
9:34
Speaker 4: ever see ladybugs at night.
9:35
Speaker 1: You don't see ladybugs out here very much, yeah.
9:38
Speaker 4: Yeah, so all of that, I said, oh, it's pretty symbolic.
9:41
Speaker 4: I put my phone down more. I mean, I don't
9:42
Speaker 4: post a lot just because social media just.
9:45
Speaker 2: You don't. You do put your.
9:47
Speaker 1: I do notice that you say relevant things when you
9:51
Speaker 1: want to say relevant things, and then you must detach.
9:53
Speaker 1: I'm guessing I don't live in your house.
9:54
Speaker 2: I had to.
9:55
Speaker 4: I had to because it.
9:56
Speaker 2: She's not always on her phone at all. I never
9:58
Speaker 2: know where my... No, she really isn't. I never know
10:00
Speaker 2: where my phone is. I'm always like... And she's like...
10:03
Speaker 2: Radio silent.
10:03
Speaker 4: Every day I'm like, where's my phone? Where's my phone?
10:05
Speaker 4: I mean, I had it in the fridge the other day. Like,
10:07
Speaker 4: I just never know because I don't look at it.
10:08
Speaker 2: That's paranoid. That's paranoid. I didn't think I froze my eggs. Ding, ding, ding, ding.
10:14
Speaker 4: Yes.
10:15
Speaker 1: That is a mindset that we all need to adopt.
10:19
Speaker 2: The sooner, rather, you know, the better.
10:21
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was driving me nuts before. And there was
10:23
Speaker 4: just so much pressure in posting. Oh, you should post
10:26
Speaker 4: three to four times a week just because of what
10:28
Speaker 4: I do. And it takes me an hour to post
10:30
Speaker 4: and I'd rather just... play with my dog in that hour.
10:33
Speaker 1: I mean, listen, I had Justina Machado on here. And
10:36
Speaker 1: of course, you know her well. And she is the
10:38
Speaker 1: queen of zero fucks given.
10:39
Speaker 2: Oh, I love her.
10:40
Speaker 1: She was like that maybe all her life. But this
10:43
Speaker 1: is the chapter of zero fucks given. So I think
10:46
Speaker 1: sometimes Gen X women can be a little bit more
10:49
Speaker 1: harshly blunt where you come to you come to it
10:52
Speaker 1: from a really beautiful, harmonious way of like, let me
10:54
Speaker 1: put my phone down and look at butterflies.
10:56
Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't give a fuck. I don't give
10:58
Speaker 2: a fuck. stop polishing this turd. We're swirling the toilet bowl.
11:01
Speaker 1: Like I'm the queen of all these, like some semi
11:04
Speaker 1: negative phrases that are just, they're not negative in what
11:08
Speaker 1: not to do. It's just like what I don't want
11:09
Speaker 1: to do anymore because we are the generation of black
11:12
Speaker 1: and white.
11:13
Speaker 2: It's like, it happened. It doesn't happen. Are we doing it?
11:15
Speaker 2: We're not doing it. What are the rules? We'll follow it,
11:17
Speaker 2: you know, whatever.
11:18
Speaker 1: And you guys learned a little bit better transition. And
11:22
Speaker 1: that's why I wonder, like, where are you with this? Well,
11:24
Speaker 1: we're such a tough generation, too.
11:26
Speaker 2: I know everyone is going to say that, but, like,
11:29
Speaker 2: we went from not having the internet. We're, like, we're
11:31
Speaker 2: the last generation to know what it's not, like, what
11:33
Speaker 2: it's like to not grow up with it. True, true.
11:35
Speaker 2: And then we were kind of, like, pushed into it
11:37
Speaker 2: and had to learn... like what that meant and the
11:40
Speaker 2: weight of that. And I feel like every generation has
11:43
Speaker 2: their own cross to bear with it. Like the way
11:45
Speaker 2: that you're talking about this new change, I can't imagine,
11:49
Speaker 2: I can't imagine because we're going through it, but like
11:50
Speaker 2: you're seeing all these reels of women going through this,
11:53
Speaker 2: but doing it better than you. Because you're seeing this
11:55
Speaker 2: polished version of them and you're like, why can't I
11:57
Speaker 2: do that? Why can't I have a baby at 35
11:59
Speaker 2: and look like this in two weeks afterwards? Like, you
12:02
Speaker 2: know what I mean? It's like you don't really get
12:03
Speaker 2: to see what's not on camera. So I think that
12:07
Speaker 2: as humans, we weren't made to get this much information
12:10
Speaker 2: at one time. Right. So we don't know what's real.
12:13
Speaker 2: Like you guys got to be black and white because
12:15
Speaker 2: it was like you got the news and the newspaper
12:17
Speaker 2: and that's it. And that was it. And we have
12:20
Speaker 2: information that's telling us, like, I just went to visit
12:22
Speaker 2: kindergartens for my daughter. Oh, my God.
12:24
Speaker 1: That's like searching for a college anymore.
12:27
Speaker 2: I know. It's bullshit, quite frankly. It's crazy. The amount
12:30
Speaker 2: of money it is is insane. But the principal was
12:33
Speaker 2: talking to me about how they had to implement classes
12:35
Speaker 2: in first grade about what is fact and what is
12:39
Speaker 2: an opinion.
12:39
Speaker 4: Yeah.
12:40
Speaker 2: Because we're getting told things are just that is a fact,
12:43
Speaker 2: but it's not. It's just somebody's opinion. And they have
12:45
Speaker 2: to learn right away what that difference is. We didn't
12:48
Speaker 2: because we only got facts in our books.
12:49
Speaker 4: Yeah.
12:50
Speaker 2: Now it's like we have textbooks, but we have Google
12:53
Speaker 2: that can be completely, you know, like changed or whatever.
12:56
Speaker 4: I think kids don't even have backpacks anymore because everything's
13:00
Speaker 4: on a tablet.
13:01
Speaker 1: Yes. Well, then there was a whole argument because my
13:03
Speaker 1: kids were right in the cusp of the backpack versus tablet.
13:06
Speaker 2: Oh, really?
13:07
Speaker 1: And the arguments came in that the backpacks were like
13:10
Speaker 1: hurting them. I'm like, I pretty much have scoliosis from
13:13
Speaker 1: my backpack.
13:14
Speaker 2: And we're not doing shit about it now.
13:15
Speaker 4: When you get the rolling backpack.
13:16
Speaker 2: Yes. Yeah.
13:17
Speaker 1: But the kids wanted to be cool and they didn't
13:19
Speaker 1: want to. When they were in elementary school, they'd do
13:21
Speaker 1: the rolling. When they were in high school, you better
13:22
Speaker 1: not roll that damn bag.
13:23
Speaker 4: No.
13:24
Speaker 2: Are you kidding me? It has to be on one shoulder.
13:25
Speaker 2: You sat at a special table if you had a
13:26
Speaker 2: rolling bag.
13:27
Speaker 4: I can't even imagine growing up with social media and
13:29
Speaker 4: all of this stuff.
13:30
Speaker 1: Yeah.
13:30
Speaker 4: Because even with AI, sometimes when it first started coming about,
13:33
Speaker 4: everyone was confused. Like, is this real or is this
13:35
Speaker 4: not real?
13:36
Speaker 1: That blows my mind because I do think that that
13:38
Speaker 1: applies to us at any... stage in life right now
13:43
Speaker 1: with midlife women really questioning themselves and straddling this line
13:49
Speaker 1: of self-doubt and self-worth. Because there's too many things that
13:53
Speaker 1: are happening at once that we don't know is a
13:55
Speaker 1: fact and we don't know the difference between. That's a
13:58
Speaker 1: fabulous thing to keep in our minds. What is fact
14:01
Speaker 1: was an opinion because there's a lot of it. And
14:04
Speaker 1: it's easy for us in this in this stage any
14:08
Speaker 1: woman really but in this stage to to fall into
14:11
Speaker 1: self-doubt yeah and question an opinion right and let it
14:15
Speaker 1: weigh too much i.
14:16
Speaker 4: Think the challenge is understanding that what an opinion is
14:20
Speaker 4: versus a fact and that's one of my biggest arguments
14:22
Speaker 4: with relationships that i have like you can tell me
14:26
Speaker 4: oh i'm this but no that's your opinion that doesn't
14:28
Speaker 4: mean it's it's true And it's a constant battle, especially with,
14:31
Speaker 4: you know, the following that we have. And going to
14:33
Speaker 4: your point about like, you know, I don't give a
14:35
Speaker 4: shit anymore and I can say what I want. I think,
14:37
Speaker 4: you know, you've set the standard there and, you know,
14:41
Speaker 4: we're still trying to. And because I look so young,
14:43
Speaker 4: most people, you know, undermine me. And then I'm like,
14:47
Speaker 4: sit down.
14:48
Speaker 2: I'm almost 40. Yeah. Before, when I said my age, it.
14:51
Speaker 4: Was like, oh, you're still young.
14:53
Speaker 2: And now I'm like, oh, 38.
14:54
Speaker 4: They're like, oh.
14:56
Speaker 2: They're like, damn. Oh, wow. My favorite thing ever about
15:00
Speaker 2: Fanancia is because I look so young and because I'm
15:02
Speaker 2: so beautiful. Like, I'm like, damn, bitch.
15:06
Speaker 4: You added the beautiful.
15:07
Speaker 2: But I'll take it. And I will. And I will
15:09
Speaker 2: because you are. Because you are.
15:21
Speaker 1: What do you do so well now that you want
15:24
Speaker 1: to make sure you take it with you to midlife?
15:27
Speaker 2: Oh, just joy. My humor. I just know it's still
15:31
Speaker 2: it's such a blessing to get older. I think in
15:34
Speaker 2: this part of my life, after having a baby and
15:36
Speaker 2: knowing what it feels like to be so close to death, honestly,
15:41
Speaker 2: you really appreciate what you have in every moment. And
15:44
Speaker 2: we're reaching that age when so many people are passing
15:46
Speaker 2: away in our life. And that only gets further. And
15:48
Speaker 2: it's like you have to appreciate every moment that you have.
15:51
Speaker 2: So for me, I feel like I'm giving less of
15:53
Speaker 2: a fuck about getting older because I'm thinking I'm so
15:57
Speaker 2: grateful that I get to be here, that I get
15:58
Speaker 2: to see my daughter grow up. Like not everybody gets that.
16:01
Speaker 2: So I'm just trying to live in that. So I
16:03
Speaker 2: hope I take with me the joy of life and
16:05
Speaker 2: the humor of life. Yeah. And not just like, oh,
16:09
Speaker 2: my God, this is the worst thing in the world
16:10
Speaker 2: that could ever happen to me. Right.
16:12
Speaker 1: Well, that is– and that is a– You know, when
16:16
Speaker 1: you get up in the morning and you set your
16:17
Speaker 1: intentions or whatever, which I try to do, it's literally
16:20
Speaker 1: for me to remind myself of my joy.
16:22
Speaker 2: Yeah.
16:23
Speaker 1: Again, yes, you guys are a hardworking generation. By the way,
16:28
Speaker 1: the zero fucks given, there's like a better happy medium there.
16:30
Speaker 1: It's not always the best template to live by.
16:33
Speaker 2: I give all the fucks. I really do. You give
16:35
Speaker 2: all the fucks. I give all the fucks. And I
16:36
Speaker 2: give them for you. I give them for you. Like,
16:37
Speaker 2: I care. She does. I care so much.
16:40
Speaker 4: I've just been like, hmm. the older I get the
16:43
Speaker 4: funnier everything is and I'm like I let them I
16:46
Speaker 4: who cares I it doesn't you know it doesn't hurt
16:49
Speaker 4: me or offend me and maybe I just isolate and
16:51
Speaker 4: I'm like, I'm not going to deal with this. I
16:53
Speaker 4: don't know if that's healthy or not.
16:54
Speaker 1: I think there's a happy medium. I think there's between
16:57
Speaker 1: that and the zero fucks given. There is like there, there,
16:59
Speaker 1: because there are times when somebody you're letting them and they're, they're, they're,
17:03
Speaker 1: they're doing it too much or whatever. But there is
17:07
Speaker 1: that there is between, there's so many sweating the small
17:10
Speaker 1: stuff that the, I let them just really works and
17:13
Speaker 1: we just need, and I need to do that more often. Like,
17:16
Speaker 1: I had this situation. This was just a simple, dumb
17:19
Speaker 1: little thing. But I wondered about my temperament. But I'll
17:22
Speaker 1: compare it with you guys. How would you react?
17:24
Speaker 2: Oh, I like this. I like this a lot. Okay.
17:26
Speaker 4: Let me have a drink tonight.
17:27
Speaker 1: Let's have a drink and talk about my flight back
17:29
Speaker 1: from Europe the other day.
17:31
Speaker 2: Do we have to fight someone?
17:31
Speaker 4: Mm-mm.
17:32
Speaker 2: Okay.
17:32
Speaker 1: Mm-mm.
17:33
Speaker 4: Because I'm ready.
17:33
Speaker 2: Maybe. Well, let's see. The amount of times I've called
17:35
Speaker 2: her and I'm like, yo, you need backup? I'm there.
17:39
Speaker 1: The moms are like, child, go do your little homework
17:44
Speaker 1: and I'm going to go take this bitch out.
17:46
Speaker 2: So here's something that happened. So I treated myself.
17:50
Speaker 1: To a little trip to France to see my friend.
17:54
Speaker 2: And I was coming... Who was that friend? You know
17:57
Speaker 2: our girl, Eva. Mm-hmm. Girl, if you didn't name drop,
18:00
Speaker 2: do it. Doing her little fancy things. I didn't want
18:02
Speaker 2: to name drop. I mean, do it. That's your friend.
18:05
Speaker 2: That's your sister. That's different. That's different.
18:07
Speaker 1: So when your sister calls you and says, come visit,
18:09
Speaker 1: I'm like, yes. By the way, that's part of my
18:11
Speaker 1: midlife chapter, too, is saying yes.
18:13
Speaker 2: Yes.
18:14
Speaker 1: Financially, is it the most perfect time to take a
18:17
Speaker 1: trip to France or Europe?
18:19
Speaker 2: Probably not. And I've only been, you know, once before
18:21
Speaker 2: in my life.
18:22
Speaker 4: So.
18:23
Speaker 2: It's about saying yes. Yes.
18:25
Speaker 1: Because I lived in this hustle of taking care of
18:28
Speaker 1: my children, raising them, being a single woman while I
18:31
Speaker 1: was doing it, making sure they're okay, that I missed
18:33
Speaker 1: out on certain things.
18:34
Speaker 2: That I'm doing them now.
18:35
Speaker 1: Yes.
18:35
Speaker 2: Okay. So I'm in my seat and I go to
18:38
Speaker 2: go to the bathroom.
18:40
Speaker 1: And it's so dark that I'm looking at the bathroom
18:42
Speaker 1: door and I'm going like this on the door trying
18:45
Speaker 1: to find the handle because it's not illuminated. And while
18:48
Speaker 1: I'm doing that, a woman comes from the first class
18:51
Speaker 1: cabin and the flight attendant takes her arm and brings
18:56
Speaker 1: her right in front of me and ushers her into
18:58
Speaker 1: the bathroom.
18:59
Speaker 4: Oh, I would have slapped her.
19:00
Speaker 2: Yeah.
19:04
Speaker 4: You can't say something like that to me.
19:05
Speaker 2: I love this woman who was just talking about looking
19:09
Speaker 2: at butterflies with broken wings. Yeah, listen. That broken wing
19:11
Speaker 2: is a part of it. I let them accept if
19:13
Speaker 2: I'm in line for the bathroom. No, no, no. That
19:16
Speaker 2: butterfly did not disrespect her.
19:18
Speaker 4: I'm not from the streets, but I act like I'm
19:20
Speaker 4: from the streets.
19:21
Speaker 2: Yeah, no. I have to hold her back so much. Oh,
19:24
Speaker 2: you don't understand. The truth comes out.
19:26
Speaker 4: I mean, there's videos of me on TMZ where I'm like,
19:29
Speaker 4: you know, like, Can.
19:31
Speaker 2: We insert those clips here? I was younger back then.
19:34
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was like, whatever.
19:35
Speaker 2: Oh my God. Good for you, though.
19:36
Speaker 4: They probably deserved it.
19:37
Speaker 2: They probably deserved it.
19:38
Speaker 4: So I was like, you know.
19:40
Speaker 2: No, that's fine. I get hyped. People have told me
19:42
Speaker 2: they're afraid of me. What did you do?
19:43
Speaker 4: Yeah, what did you do?
19:45
Speaker 1: I think this could be a sign of my aging gracefully.
19:50
Speaker 1: or just my I let them. I just like, I
19:55
Speaker 1: let her walk in. And now I will tell you,
19:58
Speaker 1: this is what I did to get back at her.
20:01
Speaker 1: I didn't say anything. And in my lifetime, I would have.
20:04
Speaker 2: I would have. I didn't say anything in that moment.
20:06
Speaker 1: When I was walking, so I go to, I cross
20:09
Speaker 1: the galley to the bathroom on the other side.
20:12
Speaker 2: So I go there.
20:12
Speaker 1: When I come out, there are flight attendants there and
20:14
Speaker 1: they're trying to prepare something. That first class passenger and
20:18
Speaker 1: I needed to cross through the galley so she could
20:21
Speaker 1: get to her side and I can get back over
20:23
Speaker 1: to my side. And it was going to be one
20:25
Speaker 1: of us or the other because it was.
20:27
Speaker 2: Crowded in the galley.
20:28
Speaker 1: The harshest thing I could think of doing in that
20:30
Speaker 1: moment was giving her the look of, you are not
20:32
Speaker 1: going before me.
20:33
Speaker 2: I'm going first. Yeah.
20:35
Speaker 1: And I walked through and she just looked back and
20:38
Speaker 1: like took a step back while and looked at me
20:40
Speaker 1: with a little bit of, with a little bit of hesitation.
20:43
Speaker 1: She looked at me and was like, okay, I guess
20:46
Speaker 1: she's going.
20:47
Speaker 2: I'm like, yeah, bitch, I'm going.
20:48
Speaker 1: And then when we were going down to get our luggage,
20:51
Speaker 1: I hear this woman behind me on the escalator say.
20:53
Speaker 2: Oh my God, I love your luggage. And I'm like,
20:56
Speaker 2: Turn around and it's her.
20:58
Speaker 1: And I was like, now she's trying to be my girlfriend.
21:00
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know.
21:00
Speaker 4: No, no, no.
21:01
Speaker 2: She like cock blocked me into the bathroom. Did you
21:03
Speaker 2: did she see? Did she know that that happened?
21:05
Speaker 1: Girl, the bathroom door is here and I'm here and
21:08
Speaker 1: I'm like trying to find the door. They walked literally
21:11
Speaker 1: in front of me, like almost had to push me
21:14
Speaker 1: aside to open the door.
21:15
Speaker 2: See, no.
21:16
Speaker 4: See, when I say let things go, I mean like
21:17
Speaker 4: social media. But in person, I don't.
21:20
Speaker 2: I say something. Thank you for clarifying. Yeah, no, I
21:22
Speaker 2: say something. You should have pulled a, like, oh, are
21:24
Speaker 2: you helping me find the handle to the bathroom that
21:26
Speaker 2: I've been standing in front of? Yes. There's a million
21:28
Speaker 2: ways I could have held this. But it's hard in
21:30
Speaker 2: the moment. It's so hard in the moment. But it
21:32
Speaker 2: never was.
21:33
Speaker 1: Like, I would either pop off or I'd make it
21:36
Speaker 1: very clear. Because I'm always very, I've always been very
21:38
Speaker 1: good on my feet.
21:38
Speaker 2: Yeah.
21:39
Speaker 1: I can very quickly come back at somebody. That's not
21:41
Speaker 1: always the best thing in life.
21:43
Speaker 2: Right.
21:43
Speaker 1: I don't want to railroad a person who needs a
21:45
Speaker 1: second to figure out what's happened and respond.
21:48
Speaker 2: Right.
21:48
Speaker 1: But I did know in my lifetime, I had a
21:51
Speaker 1: good litmus of who's just being an asshole and who
21:55
Speaker 1: just needs a second to translate what's happening in their head.
21:59
Speaker 2: Because there are people that way and that's okay. I
22:00
Speaker 2: work quick.
22:02
Speaker 1: But in that moment, against everything that I had always
22:04
Speaker 1: been in my life, I just, I let her go in.
22:07
Speaker 2: And then I sat back in my seat and I
22:08
Speaker 2: was like, I'm going to do that. Yeah. Like I
22:12
Speaker 2: was so incensed.
22:13
Speaker 1: Yeah. But I also marveled at the fact that I
22:16
Speaker 1: didn't say anything. So I just wondered like where you
22:18
Speaker 1: are with your temperament these days.
22:19
Speaker 2: Oh, I would have said something. You would have said something.
22:21
Speaker 2: I don't know. Honestly, I think it'd be easy for
22:23
Speaker 2: me to say I would say something, but I don't know.
22:26
Speaker 2: I think I would have probably made excuses on why
22:28
Speaker 2: that happened. Yeah. I think I would have been like
22:30
Speaker 2: maybe she needed assistance to the bathroom and maybe they
22:33
Speaker 2: didn't see me look for a doorknob like over and
22:35
Speaker 2: over again. Like I think I would have been like
22:38
Speaker 2: you where I was getting mad in my seat. Yeah.
22:41
Speaker 2: But then I would have done something similar or I
22:43
Speaker 2: would have like waited for her to come out. Yeah.
22:46
Speaker 2: And like assess the situation. But like I think being
22:49
Speaker 2: a waitress for so long. Oh yeah. I'm used to
22:51
Speaker 2: being like a people pleaser and being like no no
22:54
Speaker 2: you're always right or like whatever whatever.
22:55
Speaker 1: But isn't that interesting how that follows you because you
22:57
Speaker 1: haven't been a waitress in a long time. Yeah. So
23:00
Speaker 1: that people please.
23:02
Speaker 2: She might have to go back. Don't depress my ass.
23:06
Speaker 2: Don't manifest that. Don't speak that out loud. Let's pivot
23:09
Speaker 2: to relationships. You're married. I am. You're in a relationship? No,
23:15
Speaker 2: I'm single.
23:15
Speaker 4: Girl.
23:16
Speaker 2: Oh, you don't know? Well, last time we were talking
23:19
Speaker 2: about it, you were revisiting. Yes.
23:21
Speaker 4: And then we didn't.
23:23
Speaker 1: Because once you take the garbage out to the curb,
23:25
Speaker 1: you don't go revisit it?
23:26
Speaker 2: I knew it wasn't going to happen when I found
23:27
Speaker 2: three weeks in that this was happening. I was like,
23:29
Speaker 2: you didn't call me? Oh, okay.
23:31
Speaker 4: Yeah, I tend to just kind of deal with things
23:33
Speaker 4: on my own. You know, I was a person that
23:34
Speaker 4: always called my friends whenever I was going through something.
23:37
Speaker 4: And it was easy for me to take other people's
23:38
Speaker 4: opinions rather than sit with my own and then you know,
23:42
Speaker 4: talk to my friends about it. And I'm just in
23:43
Speaker 4: a place in my life where I'm trying to trust
23:45
Speaker 4: myself and not what everyone's telling me. We got back
23:48
Speaker 4: together in November and we broke up in March. And ultimately,
23:50
Speaker 4: you know, we just don't see the world the same.
23:53
Speaker 4: We see it through different lenses and it's really, and
23:56
Speaker 4: thinking about the future and children and stuff. I don't
23:59
Speaker 4: know how it would work. He doesn't know how it
24:01
Speaker 4: would work. And so we love each other. That's the
24:04
Speaker 4: hardest part is we're so in love. But sometimes love
24:08
Speaker 4: isn't enough.
24:08
Speaker 1: Sometimes love isn't enough. And I do feel that you can,
24:12
Speaker 1: just to correlate it to a woman in my stage,
24:15
Speaker 1: it is really difficult to get to, say, your 40s
24:19
Speaker 1: and maybe even 50 and realize that love has not
24:21
Speaker 1: been enough and make a really hard decision. So the
24:24
Speaker 1: one thing that I always try to talk to my
24:26
Speaker 1: children about in particular, like my daughter, is the sooner
24:28
Speaker 1: you recognize red flags and honor them, i.e. don't polish
24:33
Speaker 1: this turd, the better off you'll be. So you made
24:37
Speaker 1: the decision that love isn't enough. There's more to this
24:40
Speaker 1: that can't be resolved. So instead of trying to squirt
24:44
Speaker 1: a round peg into a square hole, it's better to
24:47
Speaker 1: let go.
24:47
Speaker 4: Yeah. Well, we both decided that, you know, it wasn't
24:50
Speaker 4: healthy for either of us. And Yeah, usually I try
24:53
Speaker 4: to force it. Usually I try to make it work.
24:55
Speaker 4: I've stayed in relationships longer than I should have because
24:59
Speaker 4: of that. And, you know, I've found a lot of
25:01
Speaker 4: peace recently in the last year, thanks to SSRIs. And
25:07
Speaker 4: so it just wasn't worth breaking my peace. And same
25:11
Speaker 4: for him. You know, we both wanted just so much
25:14
Speaker 4: peace and it just wasn't happening anymore. for us and
25:16
Speaker 4: also just being a successful woman in the business, you know,
25:19
Speaker 4: aside from him, it's just, it's just tough. You know, I,
25:22
Speaker 4: I grew up really fast. I became a successful actor
25:25
Speaker 4: at 17 years old. I bought my first house at
25:27
Speaker 4: 21 and, every other people my age at that time
25:31
Speaker 4: were in college and still living at home. And I had,
25:34
Speaker 4: I was grown-ish.
25:36
Speaker 2: You were paying a mortgage.
25:37
Speaker 4: I was paying a mortgage. And then when I get crazy,
25:39
Speaker 4: when I got on grown-ish, I was like 30 years old,
25:41
Speaker 4: but I was playing 18. So then that was another
25:43
Speaker 4: situation that happened. Thanks mom and dad, but it stunted
25:46
Speaker 4: my growth mentally.
25:47
Speaker 2: Oh, interesting.
25:48
Speaker 4: So when I got to how I met your father
25:49
Speaker 4: and I was with people my own age, I was like,
25:51
Speaker 4: Oh wow, I'm immature.
25:53
Speaker 1: But I want to talk to you really quick about
25:55
Speaker 1: Your relationship.
25:56
Speaker 2: You're married.
25:57
Speaker 3: I am.
25:57
Speaker 2: And you've been married for how long? We've been married
26:00
Speaker 2: for almost eight years. He's wonderful. But we've been together
26:03
Speaker 2: for 17. Lovely.
26:05
Speaker 1: Yeah.
26:05
Speaker 4: You got to tell her about the first time I
26:07
Speaker 4: met you guys together.
26:08
Speaker 2: Oh, my God.
26:09
Speaker 4: You're actually happy.
26:10
Speaker 2: Oh, my God. That was so funny. She came to
26:11
Speaker 2: my house and we were just bickering. Like, we just play,
26:14
Speaker 2: you know, argue or talk or whatever. And she was like, oh,
26:17
Speaker 2: my God. you guys are, like, actually happy. And I
26:19
Speaker 2: was like, yeah. And they started cracking up. We were
26:22
Speaker 2: laughing because we were like, what do you mean?
26:24
Speaker 4: I said, I'm not used to seeing this.
26:28
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, he's my best friend. And we came
26:31
Speaker 2: up together. So it's interesting that we were, like, talking
26:33
Speaker 2: about ages and everything because I am eight years his junior.
26:36
Speaker 2: And I'm the youngest person at the time that he
26:39
Speaker 2: had ever dated. He was always into older women. So
26:42
Speaker 2: he was, like, very unsure about dating me. And I
26:45
Speaker 2: was like, well, you're going to do it. But it's
26:49
Speaker 2: so interesting because I've literally had this partner that we
26:52
Speaker 2: came from nothing together and grew this, like our relationship,
26:57
Speaker 2: our careers, our family together. So it's interesting because we
27:01
Speaker 2: get so many people that are like, oh, is he
27:02
Speaker 2: your bodyguard? Or how did you meet him?
27:04
Speaker 4: Or like whatever.
27:05
Speaker 2: I was like, no, we had nothing when we met.
27:07
Speaker 2: He was jumping from catering jobs and I was a
27:10
Speaker 2: waitress at Outback. Like we really had nothing. First of all,
27:13
Speaker 2: there's your show. Yeah. There's your chef.
27:17
Speaker 4: I think it's cool that he, you know, doesn't mind
27:19
Speaker 4: holding your purse or when you're out. Like, you go
27:22
Speaker 4: off and do your thing. See, it's really hard to
27:24
Speaker 4: find men like that.
27:24
Speaker 2: He pushes me to do that. Like, I'll be like, oh,
27:27
Speaker 2: there's this event. I don't want it. He's like, you
27:28
Speaker 2: need to go.
27:29
Speaker 1: Yeah.
27:30
Speaker 2: He's like, every time you say you don't want to go,
27:31
Speaker 2: you come back and you're like, oh, I made this
27:33
Speaker 2: connection or I was able to talk to this person
27:35
Speaker 2: about work or whatever. And you're like, it's always, you
27:37
Speaker 2: have to do it.
27:38
Speaker 1: Yeah.
27:38
Speaker 2: And he's also the best dad. Like, it's been.
27:41
Speaker 4: You can see it in your daughter. Like, you both
27:43
Speaker 4: are great parents.
27:44
Speaker 2: Oh, my God.
27:44
Speaker 1: It's.
27:45
Speaker 2: But it's like one of those things where I'm like,
27:47
Speaker 2: I came from having no relationship with my father to
27:51
Speaker 2: picking somebody who's just the most incredible father. So it's
27:54
Speaker 2: like I get the opportunity to know what it's like
27:57
Speaker 2: to have a good dad.
27:58
Speaker 1: Yeah.
27:58
Speaker 2: And it's just, oh, it's just the best. You're living it, yeah. Yeah,
28:01
Speaker 2: I get to love him in every season of, you know,
28:04
Speaker 2: what we are. And it's been really wonderful. So cut
28:17
Speaker 2: to 20 years later. Yeah.
28:20
Speaker 1: What is the one element about your relationship, about your marriage?
28:24
Speaker 1: Because I do think that there are a lot of
28:25
Speaker 1: marriages that get to that 30 and 40 year mark.
28:28
Speaker 2: 30, 35.
28:29
Speaker 1: All my girlfriends are like at the 30, 35 year mark.
28:32
Speaker 1: And there are things that just have been buried. Not
28:35
Speaker 1: that they don't exist.
28:36
Speaker 2: They've been buried.
28:36
Speaker 1: So what's the one thing in your relationship now that
28:39
Speaker 1: you want to make sure you hold on to that
28:41
Speaker 1: it lives presently in this future?
28:45
Speaker 2: The one thing? Your top. I think the top thing is.
28:50
Speaker 4: I mean, you guys are best friends and it's obvious.
28:52
Speaker 2: We are. We are best friends. But it's like he's
28:56
Speaker 2: like so much like I choose him every day. And
28:59
Speaker 2: I think that's the most important thing. It's like you're right.
29:03
Speaker 2: Like through through everything we have seen the worst of
29:06
Speaker 2: each other and we still choose each other every day.
29:09
Speaker 2: But I don't I don't know. It's like I literally
29:12
Speaker 2: I found my person. Yeah. And I just hope that
29:16
Speaker 2: we take together like the person that we met maybe. Yes.
29:19
Speaker 2: You know, like those moments that we talk about how
29:22
Speaker 2: we met and how funny it was or like the moments.
29:25
Speaker 2: We even said after our first kiss, because the first
29:27
Speaker 2: thing he said to me was spicy because I had nachos.
29:33
Speaker 2: And I was like, what the fuck? First of all,
29:35
Speaker 2: Pablo's making a face over here. Like, no, but for real.
29:39
Speaker 2: But I did not. you're Latina, but because you hate nachos.
29:42
Speaker 2: You ate some nachos. I ate nachos.
29:43
Speaker 4: Yeah.
29:44
Speaker 2: If you thought me spicy because I was just Latina,
29:47
Speaker 2: that would be weird. And that would have been the
29:49
Speaker 2: first red flag.
29:49
Speaker 4: That's what I get.
29:50
Speaker 2: That would have been the first red flag. No, no, no.
29:53
Speaker 2: Because I had that. And I was like, so we
29:54
Speaker 2: get to tell our grandchildren that that was the first
29:56
Speaker 2: thing you said. And it's just so funny because that's
29:58
Speaker 2: an option.
29:58
Speaker 1: I don't know if your grandchildren are going to hear
29:59
Speaker 1: the fact that he had his tongue halfway down your throat.
30:02
Speaker 2: I thought that was a peck. It wasn't, like, a
30:04
Speaker 2: huge passionate thing. Okay, see, I'm on her bow. I'm
30:07
Speaker 2: thinking that, too. No, no, no. It was just, like,
30:08
Speaker 2: the first kiss was just, like, a cute nothing. Oh,
30:11
Speaker 2: my God.
30:12
Speaker 4: Well, listen, that's an answer for you, but I think
30:14
Speaker 4: your guys' sense of humor is, like, what makes you
30:17
Speaker 4: guys really strong is you both joke with each other
30:19
Speaker 4: a lot. And you don't take it too seriously.
30:21
Speaker 2: We have, like, a secret language.
30:22
Speaker 4: Yeah.
30:23
Speaker 2: That we, like, yeah, yeah, yeah.
30:24
Speaker 1: The fact that you revisit the first day you met,
30:28
Speaker 1: this actually chokes me up a little bit.
30:31
Speaker 2: Because maybe it's the Prosecco. Get some more in here.
30:36
Speaker 2: Drink more. Bitch is midlife right here. You cry over
30:38
Speaker 2: the dumbest shit. I've only had a half a glass.
30:40
Speaker 2: I'm already crying.
30:41
Speaker 1: That's me every night.
30:42
Speaker 2: What are you talking about? Cheers, cheers, cheers. We're too
30:45
Speaker 2: far away. The fact that you revisit.
30:48
Speaker 1: The day you met your first date and those beginning
30:51
Speaker 1: moments that just automatically rekindles everything.
30:56
Speaker 2: It's like the fire is getting a little quiet and
30:59
Speaker 2: low and you throw a log on there.
31:00
Speaker 1: You throw a little kindling on there and it like
31:03
Speaker 1: spruces up and it doesn't mean, you know, everybody says
31:05
Speaker 1: date more.
31:06
Speaker 2: Okay.
31:06
Speaker 1: Dating is hard when you have a young child. And
31:09
Speaker 1: by the way, when they get to the high school
31:11
Speaker 1: and you're taking them around and they're Their fucking sports
31:14
Speaker 1: schedules are insane in this country. Not just the kids.
31:17
Speaker 1: It's the schedule and demands. Like it doesn't end. I
31:20
Speaker 1: was talking to our girl Angelique today who was just like,
31:23
Speaker 1: I have three summer camps and then two baseball games.
31:25
Speaker 1: But then after that, I'll be at your party, you know, whatever.
31:28
Speaker 1: And she's just in it.
31:29
Speaker 2: But that's my third party and then I got tennis
31:31
Speaker 2: in between them. Everybody knows.
31:32
Speaker 1: So my point is the fact that you revisit something
31:35
Speaker 1: so simple. It only takes sitting down. And I think
31:39
Speaker 1: this is a great thing for women of longer marriages
31:43
Speaker 1: to sit and discuss the simplicity of discussing those initial moments,
31:47
Speaker 1: those initial dates. There's something really beautiful about that.
31:50
Speaker 2: Because it's hard. Sometimes you just want to you go
31:52
Speaker 2: out and then you just talk about the kids. Yes.
31:55
Speaker 2: And it's like you have to go back to like
31:58
Speaker 2: dating each other or be like, hey, besides being a parent,
32:00
Speaker 2: besides having a full time job, like what's going on
32:02
Speaker 2: with you? Yeah.
32:03
Speaker 3: You know.
32:04
Speaker 4: As a single woman who didn't grow up with, you know,
32:07
Speaker 4: the best example of a relationship at home, it is
32:10
Speaker 4: really important to, like, witness stuff like this. Even you
32:13
Speaker 4: and your man. Just any healthy relationship. Because of that,
32:18
Speaker 4: I wasn't willing to settle for less than what I deserve.
32:23
Speaker 4: And I'm not saying he, you know, we both deserve great.
32:26
Speaker 4: But we didn't force something because I saw, you know,
32:29
Speaker 4: that this could exist. I see that that could exist.
32:32
Speaker 4: Even when you did your... a little segment at the
32:35
Speaker 4: Laugh Factory and you were talking about dating and stuff.
32:37
Speaker 4: I said, okay, this is refreshing for someone that's 38, single.
32:41
Speaker 4: I'm a dog mom. You know, a lot of us
32:43
Speaker 4: are single at this age. And it is weird. I
32:45
Speaker 4: never thought I'd be here. But at the same time,
32:47
Speaker 4: because of what I'm hearing, I learned to choose myself
32:50
Speaker 4: first and choose my peace.
32:52
Speaker 2: As you should.
32:53
Speaker 4: I just want to thank you guys, you know, for
32:54
Speaker 4: setting that example and like being in my lives because
32:57
Speaker 4: I didn't have that growing up.
32:58
Speaker 2: Two divorces and a relationship later.
33:00
Speaker 4: You are welcome. You know what?
33:01
Speaker 2: But you know what? You have to go through that.
33:04
Speaker 2: You do. I did.
33:05
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm grateful for my long My longer marriage.
33:09
Speaker 1: My first one was I was young and I was
33:11
Speaker 1: in Cincinnati. And we never.
33:14
Speaker 2: You marry who you can find. You know, it's Cincinnati.
33:16
Speaker 4: Oh, no.
33:18
Speaker 2: There's a lot of good people in Cincinnati. There are
33:20
Speaker 2: a lot of good men in Cincinnati. Just the first one,
33:23
Speaker 2: not the last one.
33:23
Speaker 4: That was my first one from Cincinnati. That was the
33:25
Speaker 4: longest relationship.
33:26
Speaker 2: My point being is that. Sorry, Cincinnati. They're my people.
33:30
Speaker 2: They're my people.
33:31
Speaker 1: My point is that self-trust comes into play.
33:36
Speaker 2: This is where I want to come back to.
33:37
Speaker 1: The self-trust of knowing that love wasn't enough and you
33:42
Speaker 1: needed to trust your decision. The self-trust that choosing him
33:45
Speaker 1: every day was the right thing for you to do
33:48
Speaker 1: and it's not proven anything otherwise, but that it's been
33:51
Speaker 1: the right thing to do. So where are you with
33:53
Speaker 1: your relationship with self-trust? I mean, Francia, you sound like
33:58
Speaker 1: You have a very solid relationship with your self-trust.
34:01
Speaker 2: Now.
34:02
Speaker 1: And what areas would you say you battle your self-trust?
34:06
Speaker 4: Gosh, in what areas do I battle my self-trust?
34:08
Speaker 2: Oh, I love that these two are so connected. They
34:10
Speaker 2: check in with each other. My husband even says we're
34:14
Speaker 2: an old married couple. Yeah. Because like we fight. I
34:18
Speaker 2: just know her so well, I feel like we've had
34:21
Speaker 2: so many similarities.
34:22
Speaker 4: I think, you know, I really struggled with that for
34:25
Speaker 4: a very long time. I started in this business when
34:28
Speaker 4: I was 16. And then prior to that, I was
34:30
Speaker 4: preparing for this business, you know, taking dance and karate
34:33
Speaker 4: and all of these things. So I was constantly used
34:35
Speaker 4: to someone else telling me what to do.
34:37
Speaker 2: Yeah.
34:38
Speaker 4: And where I should move. And I carried that into
34:41
Speaker 4: this industry where I, you know, only trusted what my
34:44
Speaker 4: manager told me or what my agents told me. And
34:47
Speaker 4: it came, I mean, even if like I got asked
34:49
Speaker 4: to do, let's say your podcast, back in the day,
34:51
Speaker 4: I would have called me like, hey, I just got
34:53
Speaker 4: asked to do this. Is it okay? Just because that's
34:56
Speaker 4: what I've learned. And as I got old, actually my
34:59
Speaker 4: current manager, I remember I did that and he goes,
35:02
Speaker 4: you can do whatever you want. And it was the
35:03
Speaker 4: first time that I realized like, oh, I don't have
35:06
Speaker 4: to ask permission.
35:06
Speaker 2: I'm in my thirties.
35:07
Speaker 4: Like my manager's not that much older than me. And
35:10
Speaker 4: that's part of the whole like, you know, stunted growth.
35:13
Speaker 4: And so it's something that I've really been putting into
35:16
Speaker 4: practice the last year or two really of, you know,
35:19
Speaker 4: just trusting myself. And I'm not always right. There are
35:21
Speaker 4: times where Jess will even be like, why didn't you
35:23
Speaker 4: tell me? Why didn't you tell me? I would have
35:24
Speaker 4: told you this. I'm like, I'm really trying to learn
35:26
Speaker 4: my own mind.
35:27
Speaker 2: Listen to your own voice.
35:28
Speaker 4: Yeah. You know, even like, you know, I just moved
35:31
Speaker 4: last week. I didn't tell anyone.
35:32
Speaker 2: No, she really didn't.
35:33
Speaker 4: I didn't tell anyone because I didn't want opinions.
35:35
Speaker 2: Exactly. Look at you. You didn't know. Yeah, you didn't know.
35:38
Speaker 4: Lisa doesn't know. I was her neighbor.
35:39
Speaker 2: I'm not her neighbor anymore. Really? Sorry, Lisa.
35:42
Speaker 4: This is how you're finding out. I'll still come over
35:45
Speaker 4: and help you with tapes. Yeah, I just, I had
35:48
Speaker 4: to start not asking questions. permission and just trusting my
35:52
Speaker 4: own decisions. And even if they weren't right, or I
35:55
Speaker 4: could have done something different, at least I'm starting to
35:57
Speaker 4: understand and learn my mind more. So I think I'm
36:00
Speaker 4: still in that journey. But it took me kind of
36:03
Speaker 4: just cutting the cord with anyone that was willing to
36:06
Speaker 4: listen to be able to do that. It's not easy.
36:09
Speaker 2: No, but you know what?
36:10
Speaker 1: There are plenty of us, women in general, no matter what,
36:14
Speaker 1: you know, area of work or life or chapter that
36:17
Speaker 1: we're in that have not cut the cord.
36:19
Speaker 2: Yeah.
36:20
Speaker 1: Or have not tapped into really trusting our voices once
36:24
Speaker 1: and for all. Or answering to everybody else's voice before
36:27
Speaker 1: we answer to our own. Like that just kind of
36:29
Speaker 1: comes with the territory of when you're responsible for a
36:31
Speaker 1: lot of people.
36:33
Speaker 4: Yeah, I became responsible for a lot of people really young.
36:36
Speaker 4: I'm a very giving person and I just had to
36:39
Speaker 4: start giving to myself because I was running on empty.
36:42
Speaker 1: That is a big thing that women in general can
36:45
Speaker 1: discover too late in life. And the sooner you recognize
36:49
Speaker 1: that you, the age old saying, put the oxygen mask
36:53
Speaker 1: on yourself first before you put on there.
36:56
Speaker 2: Rings true. What about you, Jess?
36:58
Speaker 1: Where is your relationship of self-trust maybe the most vulnerable?
37:03
Speaker 2: I think with my family. I think I'm similar to
37:07
Speaker 2: what you're saying. I think for me, I was in
37:10
Speaker 2: a similar boat where I was playing young and I wasn't.
37:13
Speaker 2: So I feel a little stunted when you were saying that.
37:16
Speaker 2: I was like, oh my God, we really haven't even
37:17
Speaker 2: discussed this because I'm used to just gravitating towards the
37:21
Speaker 2: kids on set because I was playing a kid.
37:23
Speaker 4: Right.
37:24
Speaker 2: And that kind of, like, messes with your head. And
37:27
Speaker 2: now it's like, oh, no, no, I'm a grown-up. I
37:28
Speaker 2: almost lost my mother eight weeks before my wedding. And
37:32
Speaker 2: I was like... I don't know how to navigate my
37:36
Speaker 2: life without her. And then all of a sudden I'm
37:38
Speaker 2: the matriarch of a family and now I'm a mom
37:40
Speaker 2: and I'm taking care of, you know, my mother's a
37:43
Speaker 2: senior now and regard like thankful for this business because
37:48
Speaker 2: we do get paid really well when we can.
37:50
Speaker 3: Yeah.
37:50
Speaker 2: So it's like when we do work. So I've been
37:53
Speaker 2: like kind of the caregiver in a lot of ways
37:55
Speaker 2: for all of us.
37:56
Speaker 4: Yeah.
37:57
Speaker 2: And it's one of these things where I'm like, I'm
37:59
Speaker 2: not old enough to do this.
38:00
Speaker 4: Yeah.
38:01
Speaker 2: Or like, am I responsible enough to do this? Or like,
38:04
Speaker 2: you hand me paperwork and I'm just like overwhelmed. I
38:06
Speaker 2: was like, my ADHD pops in. I was like, I
38:08
Speaker 2: can't read anything for that long. So for me, it's
38:11
Speaker 2: like trusting myself that I'm capable of being the head
38:14
Speaker 2: of a household or being a good mom and being
38:18
Speaker 2: a career woman. I think in a lot of ways
38:20
Speaker 2: I was stunted, you know, in that respect. And I
38:24
Speaker 2: am the only child. So it was me and my mom,
38:26
Speaker 2: but I was babied a lot.
38:28
Speaker 4: Yeah.
38:28
Speaker 2: So when I moved out here for the first year
38:30
Speaker 2: without anybody, I was like, Now I know what a
38:33
Speaker 2: dollar is and, you know, now I know what it
38:34
Speaker 2: is to sacrifice. Yeah. So it's I think trusting myself
38:40
Speaker 2: with really any big decision is hard. Yeah, it's hard.
38:43
Speaker 4: But also you mentioned earlier, like chemical imbalance. That's very real.
38:47
Speaker 4: It's very true. And I didn't realize how bad mine
38:50
Speaker 4: was until I was having hot flashes on on set.
38:53
Speaker 4: You know, I learned in on July 3rd, 2025, I
38:56
Speaker 4: thought I was bipolar.
38:57
Speaker 2: I really did.
38:58
Speaker 4: And then I found out.
38:59
Speaker 3: Huh?
38:59
Speaker 2: She still might be. Girl, we are recording right now.
39:04
Speaker 4: Don't let her come out.
39:05
Speaker 2: We might need to reevaluate the situation.
39:08
Speaker 3: Why?
39:08
Speaker 4: Because I said I would slap that flight attendant.
39:11
Speaker 2: After she was like, I found a beautiful butterfly. I did.
39:14
Speaker 2: And I was zen.
39:16
Speaker 4: Listen, I'm a black belt. I still know where I
39:19
Speaker 4: came from. You know, I've seen some disrespectful people. I
39:21
Speaker 4: can't stand it. And I lost my train of thought.
39:24
Speaker 2: ADHD. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
39:25
Speaker 4: Chemical imbalance.
39:26
Speaker 2: That's an old bitch to tell you.
39:27
Speaker 4: Yeah, no, chemical imbalance. It is real, especially for us women.
39:30
Speaker 4: You know, hormones, for everyone these days.
39:34
Speaker 2: Everyone has... You thought you were bipolar until?
39:36
Speaker 4: I had a session with a psychologist and I found
39:40
Speaker 4: out at almost 37 years old that I have severe
39:43
Speaker 4: ADHD and chronic PTSD. So and as the older you get,
39:48
Speaker 4: the worse everything gets. And so I'm on meds now.
39:52
Speaker 4: And wow, night and day.
39:54
Speaker 2: Yeah.
39:55
Speaker 4: And so I'm able to balance myself more, but also
39:58
Speaker 4: think differently. And I'm learning to respond and not react.
40:02
Speaker 4: But it's not just even the meds is I'm, you know,
40:04
Speaker 4: have different therapy sessions to now understand my brain.
40:07
Speaker 1: Yeah.
40:07
Speaker 2: Because.
40:08
Speaker 4: When you see everyone else can move around you and
40:11
Speaker 4: you can't move and you stay stuck, I could stay
40:14
Speaker 4: stuck staring at that wall for hours and not even
40:17
Speaker 4: know like, oh, now it's 11 PM.
40:18
Speaker 2: Oh gosh.
40:19
Speaker 4: You know? And then, you know, before I could do
40:21
Speaker 4: that before, but now it's like, I'm more conscious of it.
40:23
Speaker 4: So sometimes there's just a chemical imbalance. Maybe it's not ADHD,
40:26
Speaker 4: but it could be PCOS. It could be PMDD, you know,
40:29
Speaker 4: hormones play a huge part. I have PMDD as well.
40:32
Speaker 4: So it's about just actually like finding the help and
40:36
Speaker 4: admitting that you probably need some help.
40:37
Speaker 2: PMDD, tell us for those of us who don't know.
40:40
Speaker 4: Premenstrual something dysphoria. But basically it's PMS on steroids.
40:47
Speaker 2: On steroids. Yeah.
40:48
Speaker 4: So, you know, especially people with ADHD really have it.
40:52
Speaker 4: So when you're going through hormonal changes, you know, things
40:55
Speaker 4: inside your body are moving and stuff. And so people
40:58
Speaker 4: with PMDD about, for me, it was two weeks. It's
41:00
Speaker 4: gone down to a week, but a week or two
41:02
Speaker 4: before your period. there's just a big drop in your
41:06
Speaker 4: estrogen and stuff. And also our reproductive system also produces estrogen.
41:13
Speaker 4: So sometimes our body can have too much histamine in it.
41:16
Speaker 2: Oh, yeah.
41:17
Speaker 4: And so your mood just changes. When I was on
41:20
Speaker 4: How I Met Your Father, I kid you not, anytime
41:22
Speaker 4: I had a break, I was in my trailer crying
41:24
Speaker 4: in the dark. It was the worst year for me.
41:27
Speaker 4: I was the happiest I should have ever been, but
41:30
Speaker 4: it was the most... Depressed I'd ever been.
41:32
Speaker 2: And that was from a severe drop in estrogen.
41:34
Speaker 4: Uh-huh.
41:35
Speaker 2: Not because you were bipolar. Yes.
41:37
Speaker 4: And the minute I got my period, I was fine.
41:40
Speaker 4: Everything was great.
41:40
Speaker 2: Because at least it's happening. Well, yeah.
41:45
Speaker 4: Once that happens, it's like, oh, you're good because then
41:47
Speaker 4: you're balancing out. But there's just a huge drop.
41:49
Speaker 1: And by the way, like I'm past that chapter. Would
41:51
Speaker 1: have loved to have known that something like that even existed.
41:54
Speaker 4: Yeah. There's barely now starting to take it seriously. Because
41:59
Speaker 4: a lot of women, sorry to interrupt, but a lot
42:01
Speaker 4: of women, and I could say this too, like you
42:03
Speaker 4: don't want to be here anymore. You're like, why am
42:05
Speaker 4: I here? And when I hear stories about young women
42:08
Speaker 4: that take their lives, I'm like, I bet you anything
42:10
Speaker 4: I had a PMDD because it's so easy to go there.
42:13
Speaker 4: You're like, what's the purpose? Why am I even here?
42:15
Speaker 2: You can be I was.
42:16
Speaker 4: On a hit TV show making so much money. I,
42:19
Speaker 4: you know, I had a small circle, but like good circle.
42:22
Speaker 4: And I just was like, I don't care. I don't care.
42:25
Speaker 4: And it still happens, but now at least I know it.
42:28
Speaker 2: Yeah.
42:28
Speaker 4: And for anyone listening, Pepsid, AC, and Claritin are your
42:33
Speaker 4: best friends.
42:34
Speaker 2: I've been reading about this recently.
42:35
Speaker 4: They're beta blockers.
42:35
Speaker 2: Yes.
42:36
Speaker 4: So it just helps lower your histamine levels.
42:39
Speaker 1: We should include links on more about this program.
42:44
Speaker 2: PMSD? PMDD.
42:46
Speaker 4: P-M-D-D.
42:47
Speaker 2: Yeah.
42:47
Speaker 4: Something dysphoria.
42:48
Speaker 1: Because, you know, a lot of us may be outside
42:51
Speaker 1: of this, but we have daughters and what we don't know,
42:55
Speaker 1: they're not going to know unless they stumble across it.
42:57
Speaker 4: The only reason I found out was because of TikTok.
42:59
Speaker 3: TikTok.
42:59
Speaker 2: Because of TikTok.
43:01
Speaker 4: TikTok, Instagram.
43:02
Speaker 1: That says everything about our country and how we take
43:05
Speaker 1: care of women. You know, how the medical society views
43:09
Speaker 1: women that they've got a lot of catching up to do.
43:11
Speaker 1: Let me forward this to one last thing before we
43:14
Speaker 1: have another fun.
43:16
Speaker 2: So look at yourselves at this stage. Okay? So you
43:20
Speaker 2: got like, not 20 years, right? 20 years? Until what?
43:25
Speaker 2: Because I'm 57. So yeah, 20 years. Francia's being nice
43:30
Speaker 2: and she's like, yeah, honey, you're 20. Like, I could
43:32
Speaker 2: be your mom. Okay. I could be your mom? I
43:35
Speaker 2: could be your mom. I don't know. I mean, I
43:37
Speaker 2: guess technically, but. Okay.
43:40
Speaker 4: I don't think so.
43:41
Speaker 2: It's okay.
43:42
Speaker 1: It doesn't need to be the topic of conversation. But
43:43
Speaker 1: look at yourself. Look at yourself here at this stage
43:47
Speaker 1: and you are here. What's your one note?
43:50
Speaker 2: Fill in the blank.
43:51
Speaker 1: Jessica, don't forget to blank. When you get here, Jessica,
43:58
Speaker 1: don't forget to. Like for the time in between from
44:02
Speaker 1: now till that. When you get here, when you get here,
44:05
Speaker 1: you're looking at yourself and you say, Jessica, don't forget
44:08
Speaker 1: to always.
44:09
Speaker 2: Maybe that'll help. Don't forget to always blank.
44:13
Speaker 4: I have one.
44:14
Speaker 2: Okay, Francia. Francia.
44:15
Speaker 4: Yeah.
44:16
Speaker 2: You're looking like this. Don't forget to always. I hope
44:19
Speaker 2: I look like that.
44:20
Speaker 4: I would say not forget to. Don't forget who the
44:23
Speaker 4: fuck you are.
44:24
Speaker 2: Oh, girl. That's my thing.
44:26
Speaker 4: Don't forget who the fuck you are.
44:27
Speaker 2: And who are you?
44:28
Speaker 4: I'm a badass bitch.
44:29
Speaker 2: Hey.
44:31
Speaker 4: I am a badass bitch that has been through a lot,
44:33
Speaker 4: has survived a lot, and I'm still here and I'm
44:35
Speaker 4: still going and it'll work out. It will all work out.
44:38
Speaker 4: It will all work out the way it's supposed to.
44:39
Speaker 4: Not the way you planned, but the way you're supposed to.
44:41
Speaker 4: And with everything I've gone through or anyone that anyone's
44:44
Speaker 4: gone through, especially in this business, you know, I said
44:46
Speaker 4: I wanted to do this business because I wanted to
44:49
Speaker 4: inspire young girls the way that the movie 13 inspired me.
44:52
Speaker 4: But how can I do that if I haven't been
44:54
Speaker 4: through anything? Yeah. I'm not going to listen to someone
44:56
Speaker 4: that hadn't been through it.
44:57
Speaker 1: We're going to save this clip and send it to
44:58
Speaker 1: you so that you have it. So on those days
45:00
Speaker 1: when you hit 40 and 48 and 51, you can
45:04
Speaker 1: play this over and over again and not forget exactly
45:06
Speaker 1: what you just said to yourself.
45:08
Speaker 2: I will.
45:08
Speaker 4: And I will also call you and Lisa and Justina
45:10
Speaker 4: and be like, can.
45:11
Speaker 2: You remind me every time? And we'll be in the
45:12
Speaker 2: senior center.
45:12
Speaker 1: We'll be fucking it up and tearing it up in
45:14
Speaker 1: the senior center, Lisa and I.
45:16
Speaker 2: Yeah, right.
45:16
Speaker 4: You're still going to be gliding by looking great with
45:19
Speaker 4: your curls.
45:19
Speaker 2: I'm never letting go of my curls as long as
45:21
Speaker 2: God does it. Okay, Jessica.
45:24
Speaker 1: Jessica, don't forget to always blank.
45:29
Speaker 2: Honestly, don't forget to always remember how far you've come. Yeah. Like,
45:33
Speaker 2: don't forget the journey. I think as hard as it
45:37
Speaker 2: has been at points, I have learned so much about
45:40
Speaker 2: myself and what I'm able to survive. And I just
45:43
Speaker 2: want to always remember how far I've come and who
45:46
Speaker 2: I'm doing this for. You know, I always picture little Jess...
45:49
Speaker 2: like acting out in her room and like for her
45:52
Speaker 2: stuffed animals and doing plays and singing songs. Like I
45:55
Speaker 2: never want to forget that that's who I'm doing this for.
45:57
Speaker 1: Yeah. That's, that is, I tell my daughter whose name
46:00
Speaker 1: is Sophie and she's pre-med right now.
46:03
Speaker 4: Jesus.
46:03
Speaker 1: And when she is burning the candle at both ends,
46:06
Speaker 1: burning that midnight oil, I say, Sophie, what does little
46:08
Speaker 1: Sophie need? What does little Sophie need? So she can
46:11
Speaker 1: stop and look at that young thing and, gift if
46:16
Speaker 1: she can't give to herself now because she thinks she's
46:18
Speaker 1: supposed to be 10 feet tall and bulletproof then think
46:20
Speaker 1: of little sophie and then maybe be more nurturing to
46:23
Speaker 1: yourself so i have a little game and and there'll
46:25
Speaker 1: be a contest between the two of you are you
46:27
Speaker 1: good with like 80s and early 90s tv shows yeah
46:30
Speaker 1: yeah okay okay all right so i'm gonna read you
46:33
Speaker 1: the log line of the show okay let's go let's.
46:35
Speaker 2: Fucking go this is my jam Here we go.
46:41
Speaker 1: So how well do you know these 80s, 90s, mostly
46:45
Speaker 1: 80s iconic television shows?
46:47
Speaker 2: Ready? Log line.
46:49
Speaker 1: Four older women share a Miami home balancing their contrasting...
46:52
Speaker 1: Golden Girls. Dammit!
46:53
Speaker 2: I wanted to hear the whole thing. I don't need
46:55
Speaker 2: the whole damn thing. I don't need the whole damn thing.
46:58
Speaker 4: All right, Blanche.
46:58
Speaker 1: Thank you for being a friend.
47:01
Speaker 2: Okay. Okay, Rose. Let's go. Okay.
47:06
Speaker 1: A widowed father enlists his brother-in-law and best friend to
47:09
Speaker 1: help raise his three.
47:10
Speaker 2: Son of a bitch.
47:12
Speaker 4: Now it's just a competition.
47:13
Speaker 2: Whatever. Jodi Sweden's my friend. Whatever. You get evil Agoria,
47:18
Speaker 2: I get Joey Sweden.
47:20
Speaker 4: I saw John Stamos at a Christmas party the other day.
47:23
Speaker 2: A Christmas party? Not the other day.
47:25
Speaker 1: In July?
47:25
Speaker 4: On Christmas in December.
47:27
Speaker 2: After Gloria's.
47:28
Speaker 4: I didn't talk to him, but John Stamos was there.
47:31
Speaker 2: Ready? I'll give you that. Somebody's going to be hard.
47:33
Speaker 1: A former pro baseball player and a sharp-witted college graduate
47:36
Speaker 1: run a Boston.
47:37
Speaker 2: Bar where everyone- Oh, cheers.
47:38
Speaker 4: Yay!
47:39
Speaker 2: That was right there. I went to that bar. Ow.
47:42
Speaker 2: That's all you have to say. Ow.
47:44
Speaker 1: Ow. Two stylish undercover detectives navigate the neon-soaked criminal underworld.
47:50
Speaker 2: Oh, oh, oh, oh. No, no, no. Oh, my God. Girl,
47:54
Speaker 2: you're from Florida. If you didn't get that, I'd be pissed. Well,
47:56
Speaker 2: then now they're doing a new movie. Here we go.
47:59
Speaker 2: We're not going to get it, but good for them.
48:00
Speaker 1: An elite team of dedicated lifeguard patrols the city.
48:03
Speaker 2: I got there first. I got there first. You know,
48:06
Speaker 2: they've got the remake. That was just a competition. Oh,
48:08
Speaker 2: it is. We're going to fight to the end. Here
48:09
Speaker 2: we go. A charismatic mustache sport private investigator. Mac and P.I. Oh!
48:14
Speaker 2: That's good. He's like, who? No, I know that one.
48:18
Speaker 3: Go Jess.
48:19
Speaker 2: Go Jess. Extra points for the star. Oh, Patrick. Oh,
48:24
Speaker 2: my God. Oh, my God. Don't say it. You can't
48:28
Speaker 2: ask me names. No, you can't ask me names. Tom Selleck.
48:31
Speaker 4: Tom Selleck.
48:31
Speaker 2: Dang it.
48:32
Speaker 4: Because I was just seeing him in Friends.
48:33
Speaker 2: My mom just painted a portrait of him. This one
48:35
Speaker 2: is harder.
48:37
Speaker 1: A sharp-witted mystery novelist uses her keen observation skills and.
48:41
Speaker 2: Murder, She Wrote? Yes! Jessica. Jessica Fletcher. That's right. All
48:47
Speaker 2: nine months I was in the oven, my mom watched
48:49
Speaker 2: Jessica Fletcher. I'm waiting for Happy Days. I'm waiting for Love, Art,
48:51
Speaker 2: and Shirley. I couldn't make it that easy.
48:54
Speaker 1: And last one, a sarcastic cat-craving alien from the planet
48:58
Speaker 1: Melma crashes into a suburban garage.
49:01
Speaker 2: Oh, Alf. Alf. That one I don't know. That one
49:03
Speaker 2: I don't know. No, that one I don't know. Thank
49:05
Speaker 2: you so much.
49:06
Speaker 1: You ladies have been breathtakingly fun.
49:10
Speaker 2: Thank you. But also, who won that? You didn't even
49:14
Speaker 2: give me a shot.
49:14
Speaker 4: Okay, first of all.
49:15
Speaker 2: We had the same shot.
49:17
Speaker 4: First of all, I grew up speaking only Spanish.
49:20
Speaker 2: Ay, okay. Don't you know it's un camino? Done.
49:23
Speaker 4: La usurpadora, soñadoras, amigas y rivales, no empieces, wey.
49:28
Speaker 2: A variety show that would air every Saturday with a large...
49:31
Speaker 2: I still kicked your ass. I still kicked your ass.
49:35
Speaker 4: Well, I grew up watching only novelas, so it wasn't until, like, what, elementary,
49:38
Speaker 4: middle school that Nick at Night replayed, like, I Dream
49:41
Speaker 4: of Jeannie, Happy Days, Laverne and Shirley. So that's how
49:44
Speaker 4: I learned American.
49:44
Speaker 2: Oh, so you needed those three shows? There's more. I
49:47
Speaker 2: Dream of Jeannie is before me. Yeah, that's true. I
49:50
Speaker 2: love that show. Oh, it's great. Brady Bunch, all of those.
49:52
Speaker 2: Brady Bunch and.
49:53
Speaker 4: Three's Monkey.
49:55
Speaker 2: Bewitched. I love The Witch. They were doing that one too. No,
49:57
Speaker 2: my lineup. The Monkees. The Monkees. I love this. They
50:00
Speaker 2: were all before me. Yeah, those were the shows I
50:03
Speaker 2: was watching. But they came back in reruns for us
50:04
Speaker 2: to watch. Correct. Yeah.
50:06
Speaker 1: As I was saying, you beautiful bitches, you have been
50:10
Speaker 1: so breathtaking. And I think this is an important conversation
50:13
Speaker 1: to have so that we can compare notes, so that
50:16
Speaker 1: we can share things, so we can be reminded of things. Yeah.
50:19
Speaker 1: And that way we get through it even more badass
50:23
Speaker 1: than we would have.
50:24
Speaker 2: Salud. Salud a eso. Thank you. Thank you.
50:27
Speaker 4: Cheers, cheers, cheers.
50:28
Speaker 2: So far away. I know. How hard can it be?
50:33
Speaker 1: With Diana Maria Riva is a Hyphenate Media Group production
50:36
Speaker 1: in partnership with iHeart's My Cultura podcast network. For more
50:40
Speaker 1: of your favorite shows, visit the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
50:43
Speaker 1: or wherever you get your podcasts.