Latest / EEShow (Everything's Energy Show) / How To Shift Your Mindset for a Better Life | Everything’s Energy Ep-18

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How To Shift Your Mindset for a Better Life | Everything’s Energy Ep-18 · EEShow (Everything's Energy Show)

• 0:00
  Molly: We all can get a sense of what someone is feeling emotionally, right, just by their mere presence. I think it's 7% of communication is verbal. 93% of communication that's showing up in all sorts of other ways, tones, looks, nonverbal.
• 0:16
  Michael Scalar: Welcome to Everything's Energy Show. I'm your host, Michael Scaler. Today, I am joined by Molly McCarthy Tweedy. She has a holistic space called Evolutionary Psychotherapy Holistic Center in New York. She has taken the mission on to find alternative ways outside of the normal pharmaceutical model to help humanity, society around her.
• 0:39
  And it's a really fascinating story to find people that are going against the grain or swimming upstream because most people would try and drug people out of drugs and out of their head. So tell me, how did you get into this?
• 0:52
  Molly: Yeah. Thank you so much for having me here. It's really an honor. So for as long as I can remember I have been really passionate to help heal the planet and that's something that I still am really, really drawn to even though I know it's a very big mission. And by healing the planet meaning supporting the humans that are on it, the animals that are on it and the trees and the flora and fauna.
• 1:20
  So I grew up in a home, I grew up in New York. I grew up in a home with a father who is a psychologist and a mother who has one of the degrees that I have as well which is a licensed clinical social worker. Both very supportive in their field in addition to being really passionate to serve community. So that was something that I was very drawn to at a young age. When I went through college I didn't necessarily know I was gonna go into this field but I did recognize that in my upbringing a lot of people would come to me for help.
• 1:53
  And I love being in a field where my work is connected to my purpose so profoundly and it's something that I'm very drawn to inherently. I've been in the field for about twenty six years now and I've worked in so many different types of facilities that are out there, domestic violence shelters, crisis hotlines, continuing day treatment programs, inpatient rehab, outpatient rehab, detox, psychiatric hospitalization centers, emergency rooms, the list goes on and so.
• 2:35
  Michael Scalar: So you you've you've you have your center, but you're actually a social worker as well. So outreach into the community. So going out and finding people that really needed help and being that guiding light or that angel that they need to to put them back on path. Let's first start, we'll go back to that but let's first start with your center. What do you do at your center that is helping people?
• 2:58
  Molly: Yeah. So my business partner Tiffany Schreff and I co founded Evolutionary Psychotherapy and Holistic Healing. We're located in Upstate New York which is about two hours north of New York City and about an hour south of Albany, capital of New York. And we opened our doors in July '21. We had started to plan during COVID actually in 2020 creating this business.
• 3:26
  Her and I both had private practices at the time and we were working at a crisis hotline center together and just really agreed about the fact that the type of healing that's out there is not necessarily the most conducive to what people need in order to make serious changes for their lives
• 3:44
  Michael Scalar: and You talked better their about the pharmaceutical side?
• 3:46
  Molly: The pharmaceutical side definitely is one component of it. There's a lot to it honestly. It's like when you go into these facilities and I've worked in so many different ones to have that experience so I'm just sharing from my own experience. Let's keep that real. But most workers are overworked, are underpaid.
• 4:06
  I can't tell you how many times I've heard from people going into a psychiatric unit where they might be there for a week or two weeks or three weeks and rarely seeing somebody individually like just kind of being encouraged to go to groups and never really seeing their therapist. Their therapist is just tucked away in an office that doesn't have windows often just doing paperwork to document, document, document, and that's across the board in our in our medical facilities for sure.
• 4:35
  Michael Scalar: The sad part about that is you kinda just elaborated to a big problem in society where there's so much damage being done, and there's just not enough people to support the damage that's been done. Yeah. So thank you for being out there and being the the one of the first lines, the the tip of the spear so to speak in in helping humanity get back to a track or a perspective.
• 4:57
  Molly: I know. When you think about it, it's like we're here. I believe that we're here to definitely get back to our more ancient roots. It wasn't that long ago that we relied upon plants to help heal us and obviously there's plenty of people who do that today and are really into that. But we don't necessarily have to go the pharmaceutical route.
• 5:17
  And by all means I'm very supportive to the pharmaceutical route if that helps people but I think there can be long term effects, there can be side effects that can be really problematic. There's also a lack of efficacy for a lot of the psychotropic medications that are out there particularly antidepressants. Tony Robbins in doing a lot of his seminars will always say like how many people know somebody who's on a psychotropic medication? And all the hands go up. How many people know how many people that are like on psychotropic medications for antidepressants are still depressed and the hands stay up?
• 5:53
  Because it's true it's like if we're taking a medication that's supposed to decrease that symptomatology and it's still present then like how effective is it? I think we're moving in the direction or my hope, my prayer, my wish, dream is that we're moving in a direction where more people are recognizing alternative modalities. That's what our center in Upstate New York has. So to answer your initial question and really like at the heart of our mission, it's been about shifting old paradigms that do not serve humanity from our experience, what we've witnessed and what we've also experienced firsthand in our own healing process. This is Tiffany and I as I'm sharing my business partner.
• 6:33
  In our center we have a clinical team and we have all licensed clinicians that are part of that team who also offer alternative modalities to healing. We have a holistic consultant team and so we have practitioners that are offering Reiki and hypnotherapy and acupuncture, different types of massage therapy, family constellation work, music therapy, drama therapy, art therapy. There's a whole array.
• 7:04
  Michael Scalar: Yeah, so depression's a huge thing these days. I don't believe that you can take drugs to get out of depression. You have to change everything that's going on in your life. Simply going to the gym, raising endorphins, things like that are are gonna help. But people, they want a quick fix, and so they someone might give them an antidepressant, but then now they're addicted to something that a quick fix.
• 7:28
  So it's not a long term fix. So how if I was depressed and I came to you, what kind of trajectory might we take aside from using the normal model?
• 7:38
  Molly: Great question. Yeah. Well first and foremost I think it's really beneficial for people to have someone professional to speak with about anything that they're going through. So even traditional psychotherapy I think can be really effective. We're living in a world today, we all know this, everyone's looking at their phone all the time and it's a way in some sense maybe to connect to others but it also can create a lot of discord or detachment.
• 8:06
  Michael Scalar: It's escapism really.
• 8:07
  Molly: Yeah, lack of belonging. Escapism is a great way to kind of frame it. And also the attention span of humans.
• 8:15
  Michael Scalar: Yeah we got ADD.
• 8:16
  Molly: Going down drastically. Which is really, really problematic. I think a lot lot of times what my clients say to me is like I don't really have anyone in my life who's really listening to me and really holding space for me when I'm going through something. Doesn't have maybe the attention span to even be able to have me share to the level that I want to. And so there's a lot of people who receive psychotherapy just to be heard and to have that sacred special time kind of laid out for them to be able to talk about the things that are going on in their life that are obstacles and that they really want to problem solve.
• 8:57
  Michael Scalar: Needs a safe place just to express who they are and then having someone to play ping pong with. Like, well, is this a good decision? Maybe it's not a I make better life decisions? Yeah. Maybe use social media a little less because it's such a a fantasy land.
• 9:13
  People are posting their these fancy cars and these expensive trips and these nice purses, and then everyone's like, oh, well, I deserve all these things, and it's it's all fake. I know. It's it's just an illusion that the Internet's posting because people wanna get interactions. A lot of these people don't even own the car this fancy car that they're saying that they own. They've rented it just to create this illusion.
• 9:31
  And so when you live in a world of illusion, you feel like you're being left out because everyone's got all these things, but they don't have all these things. They're just pretending to. But you can't really pretend your way to happiness. You can say, I'm happy. I'm happy.
• 9:44
  It's like, that might help a little, but you need to go find happiness. You need to create it. You need to make it. You need to invest in becoming happy. You need to invest in your own psychological well-being, and and that could be as simple as meditating.
• 9:56
  It could be art. It could be expression of some sort. But so many people are lost in societal's noise that they need to come find people just to talk to.
• 10:06
  Molly: Keeping up with the Joneses. Right? Yeah. I was just at Unleash the Power Within in Los Angeles with Tony Robbins, his event there. And he had said something that was really profound.
• 10:15
  It was one of these moments where it's like it's so simply said but it's so potent and it's one of those things that I think we all can relate to. But he said people are not drawn to those who are trying to be perfect because it's inauthentic. We're drawn to authenticity, And there are lots of people and I think definitely social media is a great example of wanting to try to be as perfect as possible and show the world that
• 10:44
  Michael Scalar: It's they are material.
• 10:46
  Molly: It's not real. Right? Not real. Then there's so many benefits to AI but there's also the dark side of AI too. Mean how many times have we all looked at a video that we're like
• 10:57
  Michael Scalar: oh my gosh I can't
• 10:58
  Molly: believe this is happening and then come to find out it's an AI experience and it's like it's not even real and like, ah, what's real?
• 11:06
  Michael Scalar: That's funny you bring that up. The lines of illusion keep getting more and more blurred with people faking the funk and now yeah, AI literally like I can type in a prompt and say put me on a a jet plane with 10 supermodels and a stack of million dollars in my lap. And there's a lot of people out there. The AI is so good now that it'll actually look like me with that scenario. And people are like, oh my god.
• 11:29
  What's going on here? And in reality, I'm just some nerd in my mom's basement Right. With a computer and a prompt, you know? So the the illusion just continues to deepen as society moves But we need to get outside of technology, I I think a lot of ways. We need to find ways to make ourself better, and maybe you can give us like, I'm sure Tony had some great insights.
• 11:52
  I love Tony quotes, by the way. Big fan of Tony Robbins. What else did you learn at his conference?
• 11:57
  Molly: I'm it's like three days. Tony Robbins quote success without fulfillment is the ultimate failure.
• 12:03
  Michael Scalar: And What does that mean to you? Dive into it.
• 12:07
  Molly: I think there is such a strong connotation that all of us can connect to that word success. I think majority of people would probably say it means that I have money in my pocket.
• 12:16
  Michael Scalar: For a lot of people yeah.
• 12:17
  Molly: Yeah that's what success means.
• 12:19
  Michael Scalar: You go to a third world like have food that's it.
• 12:22
  Molly: Yeah when you get down to the basic. But to each his own right everybody has their perspective. Whatever it is that we may be successful at whether it's the money, whether it's the career, whether it's the socialization and the friends, whether it's winning the marathon or whatever it may be it's like ultimately if we're not feeling fulfilled through that experience then we're not gonna feel great. We're gonna feel down, there's gonna be self loathing. And in some of the Tony Robbins seminars that I've been to he will often tell the story of Robin Williams and the whole timeline of Robin Williams' life and it's it's I have goosebumps even just like thinking of Tony sharing it in the way that he does because
• 13:07
  Michael Scalar: Speaking of depressed people, yeah. It's he had a drug addiction, depressed, had all the money and the fame but and extremely funny. And he projected that that funny or that that laughter as a way of trying to fill that void in himself, I think, and that's why he was so funny. But it was really sad to hear about his life story. I knew people that did drugs with him, and he was like, he's the funniest guy in the world, but he was so depressed, and he was constantly doing drugs.
• 13:33
  And I think this is one of the things that, you know, people glamorize famous people, but it's lonely at the top. And a lot of people are trying to take advantage of them, which becomes depressing as well. Yeah. Then you fall into drugs of the peaks and valleys of that. So there's a lot to be glamorized about having a simple life as well.
• 13:50
  While while people want the money and the fame, it there's edged sword with everything. Absolutely. And you have to balance it. Yeah.
• 13:57
  Molly: There's so many people that judge and shame others for having money, but it's
• 14:04
  Michael Scalar: It's more people that come from lack. And so they're lacking something, so they're judging it because they don't have it. Maybe it's bad. So they wanna make that a bad thing because then they don't need to have it. It's a weird psychology in that.
• 14:18
  Wealthy people, they don't really care about being wealthy. They just care about being well, not all of them. A lot of them, they don't care about being wealthy, but it's it's more about the success and the achievement and the fulfillment, and that leads to wealth. And then when people are lacking the success and achievement and fulfillment, they're like, well, I don't have money. But it's not about that they didn't have money.
• 14:36
  They're not seeking the right purpose in life. I think that's part of your job really is to help people get on the trajectory to finding the purpose. When you have the purpose, you find the fulfillment. And if you have purpose and fulfillment, you aren't depressed. You're successful.
• 14:49
  And that's where just doing small things like working out to a point where you're happy with the success you get, that'll pull people out of depression just in that. You know, finding yourself within through meditation, different wellness holistic modalities is gonna cause you to go within so that when you start the healing within it starts to sprout around you.
• 15:07
  Molly: Yeah, yeah I know something that we were sharing about earlier right is that so often people kind of look outside of themselves and talk about social media, it's a great avenue for people to look outside of themselves, compare themselves, feel that competition. But really it's like we are so resourceful. We're so wealthy on the inside. There's such inner wealth that we can tap into that sometimes maybe we have forgotten about or we've lost along the way or just hasn't been activated, it's suppressed. We've got to find our way to kind of have it emerge and find it for ourselves.
• 15:45
  The more that we can be centered and grounded within and know the power that we have within ourselves and feel empowered in our step and our path in this life, the more successful we'll feel, right?
• 15:58
  Michael Scalar: Was that a Tony thing or was it the event called The Power Within?
• 16:01
  Molly: Unleash the Power Within.
• 16:03
  Michael Scalar: Oh that's what it was, yeah yeah. Tony's been doing this, I don't know how old he is because he looks way younger, he's like the G of Gs when it comes to getting people to release their inner potential. That's seminars. Did you feel like the power within you was unleashed afterwards?
• 16:17
  Molly: Every seminar. I've been to 13 of his events. I've crewed at three of his events. I've been to his resort in Fiji and did Life and Wealth Mastery there. I've been around the block since 2017.
• 16:32
  What really inspired me, I mean I remember seeing Tony on TV and things like that growing up as a kid but then when I saw the Netflix documentary I'm Not Your Guru it just
• 16:43
  Michael Scalar: I love that, I'm not your guru. Know right,
• 16:45
  Molly: I am not your guru. You are your own guru, right? That's really the message. That's really at the heart of the work that I do and our mission is really helping people to recognize the power that they do have within themselves to manifest anything that they want. Something that we were just talking about in regard to success right and maybe for those who don't feel fulfilled in that success it's like something that I really value is compassion for all sentient beings on this planet.
• 17:16
  That being any being of any kind, not just humans but animals too, I love animals. And regardless of how successful somebody may appear for me in my philosophy and my value system to have compassion for them. And I think something that's missing when it comes to those who are wealthy and for those who judge those are wealthy is that a lot of them are very lonely. Because like you had said so many of them don't know if people are genuinely connecting with them or if they're being used to some extent. And so there's that question around who really is on my side, who's really on my team, who's really here, who's got my back.
• 18:01
  Getting back to that authenticity. It's not just The authentic and genuine connections that we foster in this life.
• 18:07
  Michael Scalar: Yeah and it's not just wealthy either. I was a musician from '16 to I don't know five or six, seven years ago. I was a DJ, and I was a popular DJ. So everyone would wanna circle around me to be a part of this energy, of this fame. I didn't have a lot of money back then, but it was the fame.
• 18:24
  So it's people want are gravitating towards what they want, and it's very strange and stuff trying to create it. But a lot of people have a problem with finding a path towards creating it, so they just get lost in following it. It's fast fascinating. So I wanted to bring up the energy of emotion. What would that inspire you to think of in in your practice?
• 18:47
  Molly: The energy of emotion.
• 18:48
  Michael Scalar: How emotions might affect your biofuel and your energy and and your surroundings.
• 18:53
  Molly: So I believe that our thoughts precede emotions. So the divine order is we have a thought, a cognition, then we have an emotional reaction, to that. And then we follow-up with some type of behavior or action. So I think the key is really to be mindful of our thoughts because then that will determine what our emotional reaction will be and then how we ultimately react from that place in a behavioral way or
• 19:28
  Michael Scalar: energy of a person's mind is extremely powerful.
• 19:32
  Molly: Oh yeah.
• 19:33
  Michael Scalar: If you get lost in a dark space, you don't tend to be productive versus if you expand on a positive thought, then you you might break free of the day, so to speak, and go find some light somewhere. Mhmm. Be happy and bounce around. So the energy of thought for me is find gratitude, I a great place to start because it doesn't matter how dark a day could be, you're alive. You have food, you have something, you have yourself.
• 20:00
  So start with basic gratitude on simple things and then build the gratitude out. As you achieve more, you become more grateful for these things.
• 20:08
  Molly: I mean gratitude and anger will not reside in the same space.
• 20:12
  Michael Scalar: Yeah.
• 20:13
  Molly: Try to be angry when you're in the midst of focusing on something or some things that you're grateful for, it doesn't work.
• 20:21
  Michael Scalar: I get this this like meme image of someone, I'm so happy to be so pissed off right now. No one's like happy to be angry. So facts.
• 20:32
  Molly: It's amazing. I mean how many times right have you been in a particular space within yourself where you're reflecting upon a memory that you're so grateful for and maybe tears are brought to your eyes or your heart just feels so much more full and you feel much more present and much more connected to your life experience, to being a human on this planet at this precious and sacred time that we've all been given to be here. It's a miracle to be born, right?
• 21:00
  Michael Scalar: So do you I love giving viewers some daily tips and tricks of bettering their life. Are there practices that you deploy on a daily basis or weekly basis or things that you would recommend your clients practice on a daily or weekly basis? Absolutely,
• 21:15
  Molly: yeah. I mean within our center, so we've got our holistic consultant team where there's all these different alternative modalities that are offered for healing. And we do events and workshops and retreats. And all of that has been so inspired because myself and my business partner have been so attuned to integrating these types practices in our daily life or our weekly life. I love going to ecstatic dance, it's one of my faves.
• 21:40
  I've been a dancer my whole life. I grew up doing ballet and jazz. I used to do pointe ballet.
• 21:50
  Michael Scalar: So ecstatic dance is the sober raves normally, Where it's like dance music and everyone's kinda in yoga garb. A yoga It's party everyone's just raging. It's almost like a nightclub or a rave or a party but everyone's more or less sober or green tea, yerba and cacao.
• 22:08
  Molly: Yeah, exactly, you got it, totally. Yeah, I grew up doing tap dance and then I started to learn and I was in a dance group called Melody Africa. I started to do West African dance like in the early 2000s and that's a real passion of mine. I love West African dance.
• 22:29
  Michael Scalar: So moving the physical body, get the endorphins going, loosening things up, that's a great one.
• 22:35
  Molly: Getting into a high peak state from that process. It's amazing what your mind starts to open up to when you're in that state, right? All of a sudden I have these moments, moments of clarity that really help to guide me.
• 22:49
  Michael Scalar: Yeah, used to a musician so I resonate with that. There was it was the best drug in my life just being in command of a dance floor and watching everyone
• 22:57
  Molly: So fun.
• 22:58
  Michael Scalar: As one moving, and no one's thinking about much in the that you just watch them just moving. Mhmm. And they're just blissed out in that that oneness and state of dance. So I think I think dancing is an amazing healing thing for almost anyone to do. So break out and dance guys.
• 23:14
  What what would be another thing? Obviously, you're you're doing stuff love community wise.
• 23:17
  Molly: Singing. Yeah. I'm a singer. I'm also a frame drummer.
• 23:22
  Michael Scalar: Well, that's the creative outlets. Be creative. That's stimulating. You're actually achieving something and being creative. Totally.
• 23:29
  Whether you're recording it or not, it doesn't really matter, but you get fulfillment from doing these things that emote, like music is an emote and emotion.
• 23:37
  Molly: We opened our center, Evolutionary Holistic Healing and Evolutionary Psychotherapy and Holistic Healing in July '21. And since that time, I mean it's been so fascinating to be a part of this journey. It feels like just this blank canvas that I continue to paint upon, change things up, add new things, subtract this and just it's like this art project that just keeps evolving and growing and moving.
• 24:08
  Michael Scalar: That's another thing that's great for therapy is just creating art. Doesn't even matter if you're good at art, there's a lot of famous artists out there whose paintings are completely ugly too. So, you know, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but the achievement of completing a piece or even half completing a piece, I've I've painted in multiple paintings where I I was like, I don't think this is finished, I still hung it on the wall and never finished it, but now it's done apparently.
• 24:33
  Molly: I mean, one of my favorite forms of art is children's art. We have two spaces within our business and one of them is solely designed for children and families and we have a whole little art gallery for children that has children's art. I did a couple workshops within our community for children that were free where I offered meditation, guided imagery, movement. So we did some dancing, some singing, we made art and they created these pieces that are now on our wall and really, really beautiful. So yeah, art is another incredible outlet.
• 25:11
  I love breath work, breath work is one of my fives and I love the visuals that come through for me with breath work. I will go into all sorts of little
• 25:22
  Michael Scalar: You even need drugs, just I'm
• 25:25
  Molly: singing, my body's in all these interesting shapes and forms and sacred sounds are coming out of my being. I'm like woah.
• 25:35
  Michael Scalar: Are you making the sounds or are you having like an internal music simmering?
• 25:39
  Molly: Sometimes I make the sounds. I guess it all is contingent upon the space that I'm in. Because some of the breath work workshops that I've been to it can feel like you're a sardine in a can and you're like okay I kinda wanna be mindful of the person whose shoulders I'm kind of touching right
• 25:55
  Michael Scalar: now. But
• 25:57
  Molly: in our center we've really had some cool events. I've facilitated the sound healing for them but we've had breath work where we've had two people in each room. We have candle lights, we've got our Himalayan salt lamps on, we've got little heaters so it's nice and cozy, we've got all the pillows and kind of beds laid out and blankies and everybody's comfortable and then you have a lot of space around you to be able to emote in the breath work and then offering all sorts of sound healing different Your kind of
• 26:34
  Michael Scalar: space sounds exactly like one of our EE system centers, I don't think you have an EE system, do you?
• 26:39
  Molly: We're actually, we're in the process right now of like working towards building a center. So we have two spaces for our center. We have a third space and a second space in this building that's on Wall Street in Kingston. Oh cool. Which a cool part of Kingston.
• 26:53
  Michael Scalar: Are those streets safe these days? I heard Downtown New York was kinda overrun.
• 26:58
  Molly: Well this is two hours north
• 26:59
  Michael Scalar: or an hour and a
• 27:00
  Molly: half to two hours depending upon what part of New York City you're going to from New York City. So easy bus ride up from New York City.
• 27:09
  Michael Scalar: So you're away from the noise.
• 27:13
  Molly: Kingston was actually the original capital of New York so
• 27:16
  Michael Scalar: it used to be the capital
• 27:17
  Molly: of New York before Albany. But yeah anyway, so we have a really awesome center and it's really beautiful and we have lots of different spaces. Each of the spaces within each of the two that we have, all the rooms are named so we've got all sorts of different names and each room has different color schemes. The decor is really important to us because in my experience of having worked at all the different types of facilities that I have over the years, oftentimes and I think we can all say that in our experience of ever having gone into a hospital or anything it's pretty stark, it can be very cold, artwork agree. Can be Maybe there's not even artwork.
• 27:58
  So I've been to places when my son was going through mental health challenges as a teenager and having been in some facilities, outpatient, inpatient, there were times that I would go to sit down on a chair and I'd be like it's so dirty, there's stains all over it. I'm like what's going on here?
• 28:15
  Michael Scalar: I think this is a great topic because a lot of people don't think about the small things like the space you're in. They really matter. So how about some tips on how to make a healthy space for a business?
• 28:24
  Molly: Well first of all, you can go to our website and just check out our space because it's really beautiful. What's website? Each of the rooms, it's evolutionaryholistichealing.com. And so you'll be able to see each of the rooms. We have many, many rooms.
• 28:39
  Each one has a different color scheme. There's different artwork. We have Himalayan salt lamps in each room. Machines that produce a water sound like a really beautiful babbling brook kind of sound throughout our entire place. So you hear water wherever you are in the whole.
• 28:58
  A lot of times we'll see people in the waiting room just like eyes closed and they're just like mesmerized. Mesmerized.
• 29:03
  Michael Scalar: You're doing something right then and people are just at peace like sitting in your building, yeah.
• 29:07
  Molly: We actually have clients that will say I have autoimmune disease, I have really, really intense physical symptoms that are very painful but for some reason when I'm in your space I don't experience those symptoms. So we're like, okay. Get yourself a diffuser and have your essential oils pump in. Are simple things. Sound machine and have water playing so you can hear that throughout.
• 29:32
  Be mindful of the lighting. We don't use any sort of overhead lights. We just use lamps throughout the whole space so
• 29:38
  Michael Scalar: it's a
• 29:39
  Molly: bit more of a subdued So warm, warm, exactly. Colors are really important. Artwork, you know what What do
• 29:46
  Michael Scalar: wanna be looking at all color, like if I was gonna create a, let's say a lot of E Systems Center owners watch these videos, what kind of color schemes might you use to inspire people to be more relaxed?
• 29:57
  Molly: Well, I'll take you through our space. We have Sky, it's one of our offices. It's blue, a light blue. We've got Celestial which is gold and kind of a dark blue. We have Moon which is like a light purple.
• 30:13
  Not an obnoxious I know purple can be like kind of a funny color. It's a really beautiful like almost a little lavender esque, maybe a bit more gray. We've got water which is blue, classic. We've got fire which is kind of a orangey yellow kind of color. We have air which is a nice gray.
• 30:34
  Our favorite color Tiffany and I is teal, like a teal ish kind of color. We have a room called Dream that's that color. We have Earth which is kind of like a hunter green, it's a dark green. We have Heart which is our heartbeat studio, music recording studio that's kind of a pinkish not an obnoxious pink. It's like a very subdued, I feel like it's very hard activating.
• 30:56
  Michael Scalar: So you put up like a lot of intention and thought into your space which is I think that's something to appreciate.
• 31:05
  Molly: Something that I love to do and this is like for my home and my business, I love going to the paint store and just looking at all the different swatches that they have and just checking in with myself like oh, what am I feeling? Or I'll kind of envision the room that I wanna get that paint for and look at the whole board of colors and then just kind of start to pair and pick the ones that I like and just start to do the comparison and then ultimately retrieve the winner.
• 31:32
  Michael Scalar: I love that as like a technology like tuning into something like how does this make me feel? Yeah. Can do that with colors. Can do that with a lot of different things, foods. But, yeah, just asking yourself, your inner self, or your deeper self, like, how is this gonna make me actually feel?
• 31:47
  Molly: Exactly.
• 31:48
  Michael Scalar: That's a really powerful and positive way to think is just how is this gonna am I gonna be happy with this choice? Totally. It's like a mind hack. I used to do this back in the day. Will I be happy with this decision later?
• 31:58
  And it's like, short term, maybe long term, no. And it's like, well, no.
• 32:02
  Molly: Right. Exactly. Totally. And a lot of like within our space nobody has any assigned rooms at all. Like none of the practitioners, clinicians.
• 32:12
  A lot of times like our clinicians will book a certain room for maybe the entire day that they're seeing clients. But it's open for anybody to use any of the rooms. And so a lot of times if there's a particular time that I'm seeing clients when a lot of the rooms are available I'll ask them like what are you feeling today? Are you feeling watery, airy, earthy? Do you wanna get rooted?
• 32:38
  Do you wanna connect to the sea, to tree? Because we've got all these nature y, elemental hippie hippie kind of names for our space.
• 32:47
  Michael Scalar: Static color therapy basically in your What room is making me feel good today?
• 32:54
  Molly: And it's so true because sometimes people are like I'm feeling really stuck I think water would be awesome for me. I feel like I need to move something. Each room has been curated with different elements that are gonna help to evoke what that element represents. So it's really helpful in that sense.
• 33:12
  Michael Scalar: I think there's something powerful too and a lot of people are thinking big picture so they miss the small details but you put a lot of small details and intentions into your space. It's so important.
• 33:22
  Molly: It's vital. I think it's vital.
• 33:25
  Michael Scalar: Yeah. The the little things really matter. You know, just even a smile to someone can change someone's entire day, which butterfly effect could cascade down to 20 different people. So, you know, the little things really do matter. People get lost in the big picture of like, well, I need to get famous really quick.
• 33:41
  It's like, that doesn't work that way. Mhmm. I need to get healthy really quick. It doesn't work that way.
• 33:46
  Molly: I mean, back to what you were sharing earlier just about, you know, the energy of emotions. We all can get a sense of what someone is feeling emotionally just by their mere presence. I think it's 7% of communication is verbal.
• 34:03
  Michael Scalar: That's
• 34:03
  Molly: So so when funny when get you say 93% of communication that's showing up in all sorts of other ways, tones, looks, nonverbal, the list goes on right?
• 34:12
  Michael Scalar: Can you guys spot the 93% of the cameras filming? You're only hearing seven.
• 34:18
  Molly: Exactly, I know. Body language, it's big. So just thinking I am this person who's showing up and I'm presenting to the world what's going on internally for me and then that will have a ripple effect upon those that are around me. And then from that place what those people ultimately do with that right. If you're around someone who's like super aggressive or obnoxious it's probably gonna take a toll on you emotionally and that's gonna impact how you feel and others.
• 34:52
  So it's just so vital for us to really work on ourselves first and foremost learn the tools and access the tools that are gonna help to support us to find our homeostasis, to regulate our emotions and to feel that sense of purpose in our step, in our path.
• 35:12
  Michael Scalar: There's something there too that you said, you're proud of your environment. So when you have negative people around you or or people that are really stuck, sometimes it's better to walk away until they figure their shit out or just cut them out completely because there's a lot of toxic people out there, and they the toxic people are typically trying to drag you into their toxic. They're like, I'm depressed, so I'm gonna make you depressed today. We're on the same level. It's like, the amount of people
• 35:33
  Molly: Misery loves company.
• 35:35
  Michael Scalar: Yeah, that's a perfect way of saying it. So people really need to be mindful of the people that they surround themselves with. If you wanna be happy, you need to surround yourself with happy people. You wanna be successful, you need to surround yourself with successful people. If you wanna be a musician, obviously, you're gonna surround yourself with musicians, not people that that are scholars and read books because they have no idea how to play guitar.
• 35:55
  So it's kind of a funny analogy there but yeah.
• 35:58
  Molly: Yeah and I mean honestly in today's world even if you're someone who doesn't believe that there's a lot of happy people around you then find them on YouTube or find them somewhere on the internet or watch a show where you're experiencing that. Back in the day I can remember like a few clients who really experienced psychosis on a pretty persistent basis like schizophrenia for example and didn't really have a lot of friends or family. And they would watch the show Friends and that would help them to feel connected to more people.
• 36:34
  Michael Scalar: That's probably why that show is so popular. Right?
• 36:36
  Molly: Yeah, it's like oh I can kind of pretend for a little bit and that in and of itself can be really supportive to just feeling a greater presence of socialization even when it's not actually physically present in your life.
• 36:50
  Michael Scalar: It's an interesting thought to dive into a show called Friends if you're lacking Friends. I guess that could be first
• 36:56
  Molly: step to manifestation
• 36:58
  Michael Scalar: is I need to see what friendship looks like so I can manifest it.
• 37:01
  Molly: That's another way to work it too right is that you can model so much from what it is that you're exposed to or what you're drawn to. And I mean who isn't modeling from someone? We've all been learning to model from other human beings. Back to your point of just being mindful and conscious of who you're surrounding yourself with. It's so key because ultimately you're gonna be modeling that, right?
• 37:23
  Michael Scalar: I think society is really lacking a lot of good models these days too. With social media being really illusionary, mainstream media being complete fabrication and narrative control, I I think there should be a call to action for humanity to be the the better role model that they could be so that the people around them can be better role models for the future of people. We need we need more leaders. We need more free thinkers. We need more healers, more people that will be aligned in truth.
• 37:52
  And, so many people out there trying to be selfishly in control of a narrative that they don't care about the rest of humanity, and that cycle really needs to end. I I don't have the answer to that, but maybe someone listening will will be inspired to just be a better role model for the people around them because that's really where it starts.
• 38:09
  Molly: Yeah. Most definitely. And each of us can do that. Right? We can all take a step in that direction.
• 38:16
  Michael Scalar: Yeah. We all have the power to be a leader or a role model even if it's small. I mean, it could be a small small thing. You don't have to become the president Yeah. Or a famous actor.
• 38:27
  Those those aren't typically role models anyways. It's it's just being a leader in your community, which could be just your family. It could be the your block. Mhmm. It could be the grocery store you go into.
• 38:37
  Just being a a kind person is simple things.
• 38:39
  Molly: Mhmm. Totally. Love that.
• 38:43
  Michael Scalar: Do you have any other modalities mentally, physically, spiritually that you would recommend general populace practice?
• 38:51
  Molly: Yeah. So many in our center. I mean we've had, we do in house trainings for all of our clinicians which is really beautiful and sometimes some of our holistic consultants will also participate. One of our holistic consultants is a hypnotherapist and so he's done some in house training for us which is pretty to watch. I don't know if you've ever seen anybody going through hypnosis or if you've experienced it yourself.
• 39:16
  Michael Scalar: I've read books It's on pretty amazing. I've never been under hypnosis. I've read books, and one of I used to try to hypnotize myself with a really weird technology just called a sticky note. So I would put them all over my door of my bedroom, these positive affirmations. So every time I walked through it, I would read this positive affirmation, and just it's repetitive.
• 39:39
  It's basic basic hypnosis is just a repetitive message. Yeah. So it's positive anyone can try this. I thought it was it made me happy. I'd walk through the door and I'd see a different note every time or or sometimes stop and read a few because feel inspired and you write down these sticky notes and you stick them somewhere and then you're just like, oh cool.
• 39:55
  It looks a little sloppy but growing up as a teenager especially, I thought it was fun.
• 40:00
  Molly: Yeah, that's awesome.
• 40:02
  Michael Scalar: So you guys hypnotized each other?
• 40:04
  Molly: Well, he would facilitate the hypnosis and did it to a couple or did it for a couple of the members of our team yeah which was pretty fascinating to watch. I at one point he had said okay now open your eyes and the person that he was providing that to tried to open their eyes and they just couldn't. It was amazing. It's like so cool. So anyway going into the subconscious right and kind of tapping into what's in existence there and reprocessing you know some of those memories and experiences so that you have a new relationship to them and they don't maybe haunt you in the way that they once did.
• 40:44
  Michael Scalar: That's fun. You have any other great practices for people to better their life?
• 40:50
  Molly: Yeah. I mean, I started to learn EMDR to support clients in. And through that practice of also learning it, we would practice on each other. So I've received it as well and it's been really incredible.
• 41:06
  Michael Scalar: The healers healing the healers.
• 41:07
  Molly: Yeah, a really, really profound technique. So EMDR, the E stands for I, the M is movement, the D is desensitization and the R is reprocessing. So basically it's a way to kind of help reprocess the traumatic experiences that you've had in your life or stressful. They don't have to be necessarily within the category of trauma. But I think a lot of people though do come for that purpose.
• 41:36
  And in that, you know, you feel more desensitized to it. So it doesn't have the same charge as it once did as you go through the process of it. And it's really profoundly transformative for people. I've watched it kind of unfold and it's really incredible.
• 41:54
  Michael Scalar: How long did it take you to learn this or catch on to the basics?
• 41:59
  Molly: I'm now like into the fourth level. So I finished the third level maybe about a year or so like after I had started the training. It's been about a year and a half that I've been practicing it. But I've been in my field for twenty six years so I've been learning all sorts of like healing modalities and offering them to people for a long time. So I think I had a pretty good foundation to work with in learning EMDR and sharing that with people.
• 42:29
  Something that I've always really been attuned to is the fact that we are our own healers. So even if we have 100 people around us that are helping to support us at the end of the day, we are helping to heal ourselves. We make the change ourselves
• 42:49
  Michael Scalar: You in to order start with them. To
• 42:51
  Molly: Exactly. And so anyone and everyone that's surrounding us and helping us in that regard is doing an incredible job and can help to influence us in the process but ultimately it's like we have to make the steps in our lives to make that lasting change. And what I love about EMDR is that it's very different from traditional psychotherapy because you're asking somebody to close their eyes and go within and they're using bilateral stimulation which is something that we do when we walk or if we drum. It's tapping. Maybe you've heard like EFT or different types of tapping that's out there, different techniques.
• 43:33
  And so people are closing their eyes and they're starting to tap on a certain part of their body and they're stimulating a particular memory that they've had, they've struggled with. And then as the practitioner, I'm helping you in that process to reprocess those experiences. We have a certain technique that we open and close with called resourcing. And it's simply just envisioning peaceful place that you've identified, nurturing figure or figures that you've identified, protective figures and wise figures in your life. They can be imaginary, they can be alive, people you've known, they can be deceased people, just anybody that you would identify in those categories and you're envisioning them with your eyes closed and it's bringing you into a more peaceful kind of place and also helping you to feel the presence of those people who are in your life whether you've known them or not.
• 44:30
  Michael Scalar: That's fascinating.
• 44:31
  Molly: And kind of supporting you along the way. And then throughout the EMDR experience, I might call upon some of those resources to come in and be a part of one of those past memories that you've had that you're trying to reprocess and work through and heal. And so you start to bring kind of new content into those old memories and through that experience you build a different relationship with it and it doesn't have the same charge that it once did of intensity. It's really amazing.
• 45:04
  Michael Scalar: Sounds like kind of like shamanic work without the plant medicine. Yeah. And you have the tribalism too of of the tapping. Like it made me think of, you know, drums were a healing modality in the tribalistic, like people around the fire
• 45:18
  Molly: They still are.
• 45:19
  Michael Scalar: All becoming to one. Yeah. It's it's it's interesting that would evolve to using yourself as a drum with the mental work. That's really neat.
• 45:26
  Molly: I mean, think about it. What was the first sound we heard? Heartbeat. Heartbeat. Yeah.
• 45:33
  It's that drum.
• 45:35
  Michael Scalar: 60 to a 120 beats per minute. Yeah.
• 45:38
  Molly: It's amazing. Right? So inherently, that's just the sound that we've all been so attuned to. And that is so profound to kind of find ourselves back in resonance with. That's why we call our music recording studio Heartbeat Studio.
• 45:53
  Because it was the first sound that we all heard in utero. But yeah drums are powerful, bilateral stimulation is powerful. Just the mere walking is bilateral stimulation so go on walks, take care of yourself in that sense, exercise. The things, we know all this stuff right?
• 46:09
  Michael Scalar: Don't worry, all the doctors always prescribe walking. Yeah. There's a reason. One of the oldest technologies in the book but it's really healthy.
• 46:16
  Molly: I remember one of my friends too growing up, his father had high blood pressure. The doctor prescribed getting an aquarium and having fish and just watching the fish all day. I mean not all day, I'm sure he didn't have time to do it all day but whenever he was able to. That would help to decrease.
• 46:37
  Michael Scalar: No, I love watching animals That in makes total sense to be honest. Sometimes I'll just stare at trees in the wind and watch the leaves. Those little tiny, like you take for granted, but when you stare at it for a while, remember it's very beautiful. You see the light shining through leaves and these little nuances, and it's you just become marveled at nature, but a lot of people forget to go out into nature and just be marveled by what, you know, God created, so to speak.
• 47:00
  Molly: Mhmm. I know. They call it forest bathing.
• 47:03
  Michael Scalar: That's what I
• 47:04
  Molly: would do as forest This is all this terminology, yeah, these days to kind of represent some of these incredible therapeutic outlets that we have. Or earthing, right where you take off your shoes and socks and you just walk on the earth.
• 47:17
  Michael Scalar: And the Yeah water's a circuit and you complete the circuit with the ground so it makes total scientific sense even though it sounds woo woo.
• 47:24
  Molly: Yeah, exactly. Yeah the earth's rhythm. I mean just laying down on the earth and feeling the earth's rhythm, feeling the presence of the earth and gravity and the foundation of the earth and everything that exists beneath the earth just supporting you and sustaining you and holding you. I also love laying down on the grass and just looking up at the clouds.
• 47:45
  Michael Scalar: I used to do that more as a kid but we would use our imagination and be like, that cloud looks like this and that one looks like this. But I think we get older and we take for granted the little things because we've been there, done that or something, but sometimes it's really nice to take a moment to explore around you in nature and just marvel and there's beauty there. When you find beauty outside, find beauty within.
• 48:06
  Molly: Nature is a healer.
• 48:07
  Michael Scalar: Yeah.
• 48:07
  Molly: There's so much wisdom contained within nature. When I go on nature walks, it's like there's so many symbols and signs that I can kind of transform or transmute into recognizing like a more profound philosophy or perspective or value for me to carry in this life and that can like help guide me in my path. I love I love nature. Yeah. Such a teacher.
• 48:32
  So wise.
• 48:33
  Michael Scalar: I think that's a great place to wrap up the show. Guys, like, comment, subscribe, all those good things. And if you'll drop your website one more time for those who might be visiting New York.
• 48:43
  Molly: Most definitely. So it's evolutionaryholistichealing.com. You can find us on all the social as well that way. And my business is evolutionary psychotherapy and holistic healing so we have that component to it as well, the psychotherapy part. Check us out and happy healing.
• 49:05
  Michael Scalar: All right, well thank you Molly. Well everyone else have a beautiful day. Cheers.
• 49:09
  Molly: Have a beautiful day, thank you.