Latest / The Tom & Gerry Show Podcast / St. Patrick’s Day Special

Transcript

St. Patrick’s Day Special · The Tom & Gerry Show Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Slaunch you baby in us Tom and Jerry, I'm Jerry McBride.
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: That's Tom. O'manny over there. Very welcome to a special
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: episode of The Tom.
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: And Jerry Show, a very special Saint Patrick's Day episode.
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: This one, Well, we don't like to do stereotypes, jir,
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: but sometimes we absolutely nail stereotis. Absolutely when it comes
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: to Saint Patrick's Day. The world over, we're known for
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: one thing, one thing owner has nothing to do with
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: twirling batons or dancing mockers heads.
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: No, it's drinking, jer It's the drink. What can we say?
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: And with Saint Patrick's Day twenty twenty six over and
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: done with, we wanted to get it out for us
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: on Tuesday, but there was drinking to be done. What
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: can we tell you us?
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: So with that we decided to clamp together two of
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: our favorite episodes from back in the ESD year.
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: The Old is the Forgotten, the Forgotten Vault of the Tom.
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: And Jerry Show, and for them, either couldn't be asked
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: of going back that far. We have delved into the
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: back and found two parts of two episodes where we
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: were our drunkest ever.
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: Her drunkest ever, folks. One from Tom one from me.
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: It's a bit of a kickball scramble week over here
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: Tom and Jerry Towers. So we hope you enjoyed this
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: very special Tom and Jerry episode. If not, we'll let
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: you know after these two stories what you can do
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: about it.
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: I'm afraid that was very Hey, Jack, I led the
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: charge last week, so I think it's the time I
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: sit back of by Kennaheinek and it just just let
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: letter rip, tailor Chip, just.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: Let it rip. Well, here's what it is, Paul. You
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: know what your story last week was a story of
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: twelve hardened men, longtime drinkers, going on a fucking ought
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: to see you drink.
• 1:37
  Speaker 2: It was. It really was. I mean, if if what's
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: his name they could have had, they'd be all wearing
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: if that day story was properly told and put out
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: there to the world in maybe a book form, I
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: think they'd be they'd be lads with straw hats in
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: Dublin on a certain day of the year or in
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: Amsterdam trying to retrace the steps, just like.
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: Well, that's you know what I've gotten there. I've gotten there, dude,
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: I've gotten to a point in time and we probably
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: talk about some of these stories as we roll on,
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: where you have been drinking for a long time and
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: and this is like an incredible blowout that stands head
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: and shoulders over just a normal startit. But I'm not
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: gonna go there straight away there, Tom, I'm gonna go
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: back to the start. I'm going to talk about one
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: of the times when I was the drunkest I've ever been,
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: which is, don't you know also one of the first.
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: Time first times?
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, I've ever been drunk, Because who
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: fucking knows how much anesthetic would it take to knock
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: you out? Tom? You don't know. You just fucking stick
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: it in your arm and hope keep who knows? Okay,
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: do you really honestly know how many hot dogs you
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: could eat? Tom? Have you ever fucking tried pushed yourself
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: to the limit something? Or do you just have a
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: best guess?
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: I know how many chicken wings I can eat from
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: empty to absolutely full, and that's one hundred and nineteen.
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: But that's me why we're just while we're throwing out figures,
• 3:04
  Speaker 3: I'm just saying we're.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: Throwing out figures. I can tell you my pron limits
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: is a run about one hundred and ten as well.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, the pron king ring.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: Ring before we fucking devolve into the fucking snacks and things.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: Let's take you way back, Tom, Let's take you back
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: to one of the earliest times when McBride got ship
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: faced drunk.
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: We should have a tune there, We should really lay
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: a bit of a tune there where we actually just
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: some I don't know, some bluegrass music kicks in or
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: something like that. No, se and copperhead row just kicks
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: in because we know something heavy is coming.
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: I'm thinking more like the fucking team song, the Family Ties.
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: We're going way back. I'm gonna take it. I'm gonna
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: take it to a time when I was about I'm
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: gonna say sixteen, okay, maybe seventeen, fourth class and fourth
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: year in school, okay, and it was runnabouts.
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: For an Irish teenager.
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: This is when you get started drinking, Okay, when you're
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: having a fucking clue how to drink and you don't know,
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: you know nothing about it, you don't know what's going
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: to knock you out, what's not going to knock you out,
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: and the bravado of the people that you're drinking with
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: kind of throws you as to what is normal. And
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: I'll never forget being a young lad at a non
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: alcohol disco. You remember the non alcoho discos to everybody was.
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: Fucking I certainly do. We used to go to a
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: place just outside of over the county border into Limerick
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: called Dune and it was the spot. It was a
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: big old fucking parochial ga hall in this little arc
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: village and people used to travel for fucking ever and
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: I don't know what was the draw. It would just
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: look like every other one, but they used to get
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: the odd to FM DJ.
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: And you know, I have a place very like that.
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: Before I tell you about the place, I want to
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: tell you about one of the lads will never forget.
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: This is one of my first nights out. And he
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: came in and he was drunk. Nobody else was and
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: he wasn't even that drunk. He was like, well sober,
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: And we're like, oh, are you drinking? Are you drinking?
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: Were you drinking? Who was drinking? Will you drink? And
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: he goes yeah, but not much. It was me and
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: Mickey had we're drinking. We only had ten cans each,
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: you know, not a whole pile.
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: Jesus and Christ and like that stuck with me.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: For like ten or fifteen years after the time round
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: because because I'm like, six cans will kind of knock
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: me on my ash even to this day. And you're
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: telling me you drank ten cans as a fifteen year
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: old child and walked into a non alcohol disco and yes,
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: seem grand like it never it just could never weigh up.
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: I was like, fuck me, he must be like the
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: platinum drinker of all time. But like in Aftel fact,
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: he was almost certainly just talking shit.
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: So I didn't know what was drunk or what was
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: not drunk. And here's the other thing, Tom, I had
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: no fucking access to drunk. I'm a fucking sixteen year old, Kay,
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: I'm a fucking walking into a pub and getting the
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: Serf's not gonna happen, all right, Yeah, So you're doing
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: what you can at home. You're swiping drink. Of course,
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: now you can't. You can't swipe enough drink that it'll
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: be noticed. We had like we had, as the Americans
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: would call it, a liquor cabinet, and.
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: It was a yeah, liquor cabinet.
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: And what it was was like there was like a
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: built in unit in the sitting room in the good room,
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: and the built in unit the drawer on the bottom
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: let flank corner had all the drink in it, and
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: like you know, if you pooched in way in the back,
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: there was like fucking drink you'd never seen before, or say
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: something fucking who is this drink for your Sandymons Sandymon's
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: pork and ship like this it was for whoever came
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: about the house. And some of it had never been touched.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: And there was bottles that you knew were never going
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: to be touched, whereas there might be like a bottle
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: of Paddy or Powers, Powers or whatever would be that
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: my dad would fucking work his way through over the
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: course of a year, like knowing that there none in
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: the house was big drinkers, but if someone came around
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: that might get a drink. And generally it was that
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: you knew there was something in the back, like a
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: bad corrigin or some such that'd have been there for
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: fucking for time. And I memorial right right, So that's
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: where I was getting the drink and where I was
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: going to drink it. Tom was a place called the
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: Oasis Nightclub, Charrickmacross a song they never played at the Oasis,
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: which was a fucking missed opportunity. But if the oaysis nightclub,
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: Carrot m Across, it's the place where Meatlove played and
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: said he'd never go back to midnight at the fucking Oasis.
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: Did they want the place? Burnt down?
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: Meat Club played in the Oasis and Charrickmacross.
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: Yes, I was lucky and was lucky to get out
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: of it. Here's the thing with the Oasis Nightclub, Charrit
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: m Across, Tom, here's the thing, just like your your
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: pro ky jay Hal. The Oasis Nightclub was at one
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: stage the largest nightclub in Ireland and at another stage
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: one of the largest nightclubs in Europe. What yeah, and
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: you this is?
• 7:54
  Speaker 2: Are we talking show bends like Big Tom and all
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: the rest of the play.
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: There there was the original, the original Oasis Nightclub which
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: held about a thousand and often held a hell of
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: a fucking lot more. And then that done me for
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: non alcohos up until I was about seventeen or eighteen
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: or so, and then they closed it for a year
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: and they reopened it as the Oasis Superclub and that
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: was a two floor a Beta Ministry of Sound style
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: nightclub that held on any given Saturday night, five thousand people, Jesus,
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: Mary and Joseph in character cross And here's the thing, Tom,
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: we just thought that was what nightclubs were. Yeah, yeah,
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: because we knew no better. We thought, like, you know,
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: you go, oh yeah, every night club in the country
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: you have to cueue for an hour and a half
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: to get into, you.
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: Know, wow, every night shit, every.
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: Nightclub you go to has two floors. The longest bar
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: in Ireland has buses from Belfast coming down, like there
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: are people up that way.
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: What roughly around what year was this, Jerry?
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: This was pre nine eleven, Sorry for fucking measuring everything
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: like that. The Oasis as I was, as I went
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: to it was was nineteen ninety six. No, no, not
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: even no. Nineteen ninety six was when I was sixteen
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: going to non Alcohos and then a close and reopened
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: as like the fucking big, massive nightclub and I was
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: old enough to drinking in that stage was like ninety
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: eight ninety nine or the start of the Tiger was
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: roaring at that stage because there was a few opened up.
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: There was one opened up and done drum a village
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: in the middle of nowhere, and like that.
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: They had They had these giant granite wizards sitting on
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: chairs beside the DJ box. They had a glass floor
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: on one of the levels. Bananas stuff, bananas stuff. But
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: this sounds phenomenal.
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: Five thousand people, Like you know what it is, five
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: thousand people in the US's nightclub cart across tom That's
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: just five thousand people going all the more crazy to
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: fucking Cotton Eye Joe everything. Yeah, you know, it's not
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: like five thousand people. And we're we're also like real
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: suave and fucking sipping Martiniz and shit like this. We
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: were just it was like five thousand barbers. And I've
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: talked to people to this day that when they say, oh,
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: I'm from I say I'm from caravl Mcross and go, oh,
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: have you ever been to the Oasis night club? And
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: I'd be like, yeah, I went to it every fucking
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: week for four years straight until the novelty war of it,
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: and I just didn't want to go by to it. Yeah,
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: And they're like, are you fucking kidding me? Me and
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: my friends saved up for three years to go to it.
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: Once from Mullingar Jesus Christ and and like you know,
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: oh yeah, and me and Mapal's got a bus down.
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: We hired a minibus from doney Gall for twenty fourth
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: to go down to the night Oasis. Like it was
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: like this mythical fucking pilgrimage.
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: You build it and they will come, as they say.
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: And we were just like, well, that's our nightclubs. You know,
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: we don't really like it all that much, and we're
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: sick going to it. And the King's Courtlands are going
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: to kick the shit of me. I have to see
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: me and one more time, you know. So that's the Oasis.
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: So I'm gonna take it in nineteen ninety six, ninety
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: seven when I'm a young fella, I'm heading to the
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: Oasis nightclub and it's old style and it's a low
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: roofed nightclub that you know, just a square black box,
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: very big, sticky floors and a hell of a lot
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: of fucking teenagers, okay, and the ocean will be that
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: when we hit this place, we're going to be drunk.
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: Who's bringing drink? Everybody bring a bit of something. This
• 11:17
  Speaker 1: is where I got as drunk as I have ever
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: been in my left home. Because you didn't fucking know
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: what you were drinking. Someone was bringing two Kansas mitis,
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: and another lad could manage to get like three bottles
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: of bodwise right, like a kind of harp here and there,
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: or some other lad's gonna come and he's gonna have
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: six cans of harp and you might get the half
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: or you share it around the place, or someone's coming
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: and they have a naggin a vodka and like you know,
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: if you bring your can of seven up, like it'll
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: give yourself out of it. Like it's real fucking childish
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: down a lane drinking, right.
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, scavenger stuff.
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: It's real scavenger stuff. But as you know, the one
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: rule of drinking tom is don't make your fucking drinks.
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: The Yeah, yes, definitely one.
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: That's that's that's that's high on the list of priorities. Okay.
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: Now I had indulged in something that I did knows
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: a thing. Anytime I was going to the dances, as
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: we could come around, the bus would come around and
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: pick us all up. Okay, yeah, so that was just
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: like you know, such a so and sow's bus ring
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: about really swing around my house and get me. Yeah,
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: I'll be around here, around about half here by a
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: large Okay, I was doing a thing Tom called pre drinking. Drinking, yes, drinking,
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: which is just the way you do it. But I felt,
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: I was, like, you know, really smart at the time.
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: I felt I'd invented this. I'm drinking before I get
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: on the bus, so I'm kind of drunk when I
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: got there. And then when you get there and it's
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: a scrum for who has fucking what. You don't have
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: to involve yourself in that, because you know you've had
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: what is, for all intentsive purposes, your night's drink before
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: you've left the house, right, So what I would do
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: is I go to the liquor cabinet, and I was smart.
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: I thought not to take too much drink out of
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: any given.
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: Bottle, because that in the American gangsters just greed.
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: That's just great, baby. So what I did instead was
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: take a couple of mouthfuls out of each one.
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: Lovely, it's lovelies, you're just slabbering your fucking teenage lips
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: all over the tops of these battles that maybe someday
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: drank by a fucking local priest that comes to his house.
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: And okay, sort of listening at the door and be
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: like okay, hennessy, hennessy, go go. Okay, that's okay. Then
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: let's have another look, hug hugger. Let's have a look
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: out here. Okay, hugger, hugger, you know, and just like
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: animal drinking, and then and then you go and because
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: the drink was in, Yeah, you know, you're smart leaving
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: the house. I'll have a couple of drinks and I
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: never have to drink again, because that's how drink works.
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: Not no one, as a young fellow, Tom, but no,
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: that's not how it works. We get a couple of
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: drinks into you, all you want is more drinks. So
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: you land at the fucking designated lane outside the Oasis nightclub.
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: Charrat m Across where we drank was across the road
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: from the cart Across there was a pipe factory that
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: made like, you know, the flu liners that go into
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: your chimney, the big orange ones. And behind a pipe factory,
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: what do you gotta you need something to make flu
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: liners with? So what's behind that, Tom benfactory? A fucking quarry.
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: Tom quarry, a quarry that went down like nine stories
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: that was separated from the road we were drinking on
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: by a bit of a.
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: Hedge, not even a proper hedge, just and we were
• 14:14
  Speaker 3: and like, you know, the lads are like, you know
• 14:16
  Speaker 3: that that's a.
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: Big quarry there, and like we'd be like a quarry,
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: you know, and you'd be up on top of the
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: hedge looking over down into this fucking sheer cliff that
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: falls like eleven stories down, you know, and like you'd
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: be mess and drunk and like, oh mind, you don't
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: fall in. Like how I wasn't fucking killed. I'll never know.
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: Here's where I made my big mistake. Tom, you're listening
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: to that, going like I've outlined several mistakes you've made here.
• 14:40
  Speaker 2: Absolutely, Yeah, my big.
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: Mistake was I decided that I would take drinks from
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: the house to the nightclub. But like what you do
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: that in without You couldn't take it into the nicclub
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: because you were get searched at the door. Okay, So
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: you couldn't have a fucking score a bottle in your pocket? Okay, yeah,
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: Dick's not that big. You couldn't. You couldn't. You know,
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: it gets caught and it'd be taken off you and
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: for all we'd know your parents called the trouble trouble
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: of Okay, what you needed really was a hip flask,
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: which I did not have tom Okay, I didn't have
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: a hip flask of sixteen in Monahan.
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, fox sake, next thing you're gonna be wearing
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: a monocle and tapping your cigarettes on your fucking silver
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: buttcase as well.
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: So I'm like, what what is a bottle here that
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: I can use to get drink from here to there? Okay?
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: So I went down to the bathroom and it was
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: we had a cabinet in the bathroom with all sorts
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: of fucking creams and potions and such like. And my
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: mom had a bottle of oiler ula. This is right.
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: This is before.
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: It's right, pick up, before it was ol.
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: This is before it was ol. We're going to old school.
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: Half liter bottle of oiler ula. So it's about the
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: size of a naggin. Okay. And if you know a
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: bottle of oil of uli, it's thin, it's flat. Okay,
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: it looks it looks like a phone is thin and flat.
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: And I put the bottle of a pocket and I
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: pad of myself, and.
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: I was like, that's flat, that's flat.
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: You can pat it and you wouldn't know it. So
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: abided my time.
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: You would have done well in prison, but bride right.
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: I'm a fixer. Abide in my time until like my
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: mum eventually used it all up and like you know,
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: I rescue and she was like, that's all done. I
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: watched it go into the bin, and I went out
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: to the bin and I got it, and I pried
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: the top off it, and I washed it out a
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: whole bunch of times.
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: So sharpened it into a knife, and you shoutd fucking somebody, sorry.
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: I stabbed a whole bunch of lads. And that was
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: what I was going to use for my hip flask
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: to take one half liter of alcohol to the oasis
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: night and I drank. I drank every fucking drop of it,
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: apart from what I shared with a couple of lads
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: that I was with. Okay, yeah, you're not seeing the
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: drunk as you've ever been here before, right Tom, because
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: it's what you're you're sharing a nagging with three lads.
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: I mean, like even the weakest of teenagers could probably
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: take that right. Of course, what I filled it with
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: was a bottle from the back that I hadn't touched
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: yet a bottle of cork dry gin okay, lovely Jesus
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: Mary jokes. And I took a couple of swings of
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: it before I left the house, and I'm like, well,
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: I guess that's what just what gin tastes like?
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: Hell?
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: Yes, you know, Like what can we do? And I
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: poured it into my fucking oiler U lay bottle and
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: I put it in a padd of the side of
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: my thing, and like, I'm fucking the perfect crime here, okay,
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: rock and roll. And we went and we had like
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: the various cans and ship there beside the pipe factory
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: and we're all fucking scot there getting into the place.
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: How they let us into the place, I don't know,
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: but at that stage didn't really care. You got three
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: pounds indigo, good on? Yeah?
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: Three?
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: When we got in there, the bar would only sell
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: soft drinks because it was a non alcohol, don't you know.
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: It would sell you a coke seven up or Club Orange,
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: your options. Okay, so we'd get canned. The plan was
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: to win and get Kansas to seven up apiece, drink
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: a wee bit out of it, and then McBride had
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: the fucking hipagging a liquid in an oiler U lay
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: bottle in his pocket, all right, and it was gin.
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: And I told everyone it was gin. We drank it,
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: and Tom, it was not gin.
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: Fuck you just with the little cheeky hip fask and
• 18:11
  Speaker 2: I just imagine you at prom going up to the
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: punch bowl like trying to distract the spiking it. Yeah,
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: what the fuck?
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: It was not gine, Tom, it was potching.
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: Of course it was poching. Yeah, because you're from fucking
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: Monahan and that's of course. Yeah. I mean, if if
• 18:29
  Speaker 2: Copperhead Road was anywhere in Ireland, it would be at
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: somewhere in fucking character across.
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: And here's the thing, Tom, I didn't know it was
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: patching because I didn't fucking know what potching was. All Right,
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: I drank it, and for all the times of purpose,
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: I was like, I guess that's just gin, all right.
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: For anybody that's never drank potching, don't drink potching, just yeah,
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: just don't do it, Okay.
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: As you're by your throat disintegrates, you're going, I guess
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: that's what cork people call fucking gin.
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're you're there like your fucking throat does like
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: a spy chomping on his back bowler. He's been caught
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: in fucking North Korea. You're like, well, that's that's how
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: they like it, and cork, yes, yeah, patchin. You never
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: have it in the house to drink. We we've always
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: had a bottle of patching in the house. Never would
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: you drink it. You would have it for sore muscles.
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: You would have it for aches and pains, things like this.
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: If you had a calf in the house that was sick,
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: you mix a bit of putching in with the mash,
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: and the calf gets drink, gets fucking drunk. Quid's giving out, Tom.
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: I don't know what the fucking science was there, but
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: Patchin's not a drink and drink all right, you take
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: it out maybe every now and then if there's Americans
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: in the house. And my god, I had authentic patching
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: that was made in a fucking barrel up the road
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: or whatever the hell it was. But what you certainly
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: fucking don't do is drink. And what you certainly don't
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: do is take panic mouthfuls alvas in the house before
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: the bus comes to take you to the non alcohol
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: and then you don't drink a pile more drink outside
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: of fucking quarry and then you certainly do not going
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: to the oasis called a damn night club in Charrot
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: mccross and drink a fucking quarter of a liter of
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: it mixed in a ten to seven up.
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: So how many mouthfuls did you have before he left
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: the house?
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: I had like two big mouthfuls, but like I was
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: a pure gold and it wasn't like here's the thing,
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: Tom and I drinking it like a thirsty guy. Yeah,
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: drinking it like a thirsty get Like I told you
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: before when I was telling you about the movie Prep. Like,
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: I can drink pretty much aaton.
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, if it has to be.
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: Drunk, I'll drink it. You know, whiskey whiskey like it
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: burns as you drink it and such like.
• 20:34
  Speaker 2: But I could drink a muggo whiskey, no problem, I
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: bet if I just I think my in my in
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: my condition I say that like I'm pregnant, but in
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: my lack of drinking ability these days, if I drank
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: a mug of Pochin, it'd be like drinking fucking movie Prep.
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: It would just go straight through me.
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: It would just go straight from me. And like you know,
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: if I was drinking there like I could drink a
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: mugg whiskey, Like I get drunk instantly. I'm sick promptly after,
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: but like the actual drinking of it wouldn't trouble me.
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah, get you know.
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: So when I say I took a couple of slugs
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: of patching before I went out, it was like fill
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: them out, drink, fill them out, drink, fill them out, drink. Okay,
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: so I'm well full of it. I have like a
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: nagging a patching in me easily.
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: This ship is not for fucking human consumption.
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: Not for human consumption. And there's a couple of pals
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: of me, and they've imbibed as well. Now Tom, they
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: fall by the wayside fairly promptly, like they basically just
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: switch off and their moms, their moms come and get them.
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: All right, there's a non alcohol I stress. We are children.
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: Worst case scenario, the mother shows up in.
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: The spencer, takes them out, takes them to the the bencer,
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: takes them out of the nightclub and round to that
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: it's a hotel as well, round to the lobby of
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: the hotel and sits them on the fucking wherever it is,
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: and phone calls are made, you know, to come get
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: your child because he's you know, he's feeling ill, all right,
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: and I'm in the nightclub popping away Hans and to
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: fucking jump around.
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: Wait now, so the boys have burnt out. They've only
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: hit the pochine that you gave them. Yes, fucking lightweight.
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: You must have felt like fucking rocky at that point,
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: did you?
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: I felt like rocky for like maybe about six or
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: seven minutes. Because here's the thing, Tom, I didn't know
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: that that was potchin and I drank until like fucking
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: ten years later, you know, after years of chicken gin,
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: And I was like, it doesn't ever did the change
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: cork dry gin. It doesn't take like taste like it
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: used to taste. And that was like, what are you
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: talking about? Goes? You know, it used to be a
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: different taste with like the bottle that you had, Like, Son,
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: that's fucking pachy And I was like, oh shit, that's
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: what fucking wiped us out in the waist his night
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: from that night, we're drinking moisturize are tinted.
• 22:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, definitely didn't help because I can guarantee as a
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: teenager you did not have the sophistication or the patience
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: or the ability to clean out.
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: I thought I did, but like it was brought back
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: to me when I watched I don't know if you
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: watch All with Sonny in Philadelphia, but there was an
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: episode where they go to the Jersey Shore and there's
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: a strict no open bottle policy on the beach, so
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: they get around that by drinking from fucking washed out
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: suntan lotion bottles. And I'm like, I was fucking decades
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: ahead of you people.
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: Jesus Christ, yes you were so. Six seven minutes after
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: the boys have been escorted after a building, I fucking buckle,
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: you're out dancing.
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: I'm like dancing to jump around of course. And that
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: was that was a big song because like you know,
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: you had like your slow sets and fucking Seline Dion
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: would sing the Power of Love and all this kind
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: of shit, and then like you know, the DJ it
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: seemed to just be like, you know, okay, let them
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: all out there, let them have their shifts, and then
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: just hit them with jump around and then fucking mobbing.
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: He thought it was really funny to see all these
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: tender young people getting their first kisses all of a
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: sudden fucking mob by a big fucking load of lads.
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: And I was out there for jump around, which is
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: standard issue jump around dancing. You jump around, and I
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: was jumping around and one time I went up and
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: when I came down, the knees just weren't there for me.
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: Tom I collapsed into my own footprint, like the fucking
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: twin Towers. I was just like, I was just controlled demolition.
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: Turns out touching Willburn fucking steel, fucking.
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: And Wilbourn Steel and and I was like, fucking. There
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: was a pal of mine that was like, you know,
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: we're drinking. I goes I was drinking and goes, okay,
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: well listen, like just just hold your ground and we
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: get take here over here. We'll sit you on this
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: very sticky sofa. You just fucking sit there. And I'm
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: like going, like space and time just like is just
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: pissing out of me. And I'm like, fuck me, what's
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: going on here? And everybody's coming over like are you
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: all right?
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: And like.
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: I said, you're just like I'm just like, don't fucking
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: get the bouncer. I'm fine, please walk away, Please leave
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: me alone. Just don't get the bouncer. And they're like what.
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: And I realized that I'm just like and like, I'm
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: counting down the minutes because I know what fucking they're playing.
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: Jump around. Then they're gonna play out here, brothers, and
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: then they're gonna play you know, fucking something else, and
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: then it's national anthem, and then we're fucking gone. We're
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: on the home stretch here and I can get in
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: the bus and go home, and I am fucking naked
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: to the national anthem. I have to stand for the
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: national anthem because I had a pal and he would
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: get very fucking crossed and fucking rash if he didn't
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: stand for the national anthem buckled as I was. And uh,
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: they got me onto.
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: The imagine big pride I've born into the fourth of
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: July fucking efforts. He's all of a sudden in a
• 25:38
  Speaker 2: wheelchair with an army jack night.
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: Fuck you guys, and they got I got I got
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: home and I had to go to work the next day.
• 25:49
  Speaker 1: It was a Friday night night. I had a Saturday job.
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: And that not only was that the drunk as I've
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: ever been, because I don't fucking know how I got home, Tom,
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: I don't have a fucking idea how I got home.
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: I mean the guy the fucking drove me home just
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: basically pulled out of the door and like, you know,
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: I just got out and made it up because I'm
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: fucking no idea, what's happening to me? Think I'm dying.
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: This is like your first teenage just go proper fucking
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: annihilated drunk. And I woke up the next morning I
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: had to go to work still drunk, like you know,
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: you're you're, you're, you're drunk on this ship for quite
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: some time after Ah and I went into work the
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: next day and there was like it was like I'll
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: never forget the time like it was it was like
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: work in a harder shop, and it was like a
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: paliddle lime that when the work carried it in then
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: scraped it against the wall and the back, the back
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: forty bags of lime had all bust and just sort
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: of flumped it out onto the ground. And I was
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: handled a roll of black plastic sacks and a shovel
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: and said, did a needful there? You know, we get
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: half price for that lime. And I was shoveling lime,
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: hungover from patchin, not knowing what was happening. And I
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: was there like am I sick? Am I dying, like,
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: what the hell happened here? And like, didn't have the
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: knowledge to know? You're hung over, shithead, Yeah you are.
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: This is what this is. You are hungover because you
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: were drinking. I got home and my mam was there
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: waiting for her. She goes, uh, name redacted. She goes,
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: I got a call from so and So's mommy last night.
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: He's very sick. Do you knowing about what happened to him?
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: I goes, Wow, she's her own son, obviously, fucking you know,
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: fallen soldier and all the rest of us back gave
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: the fucking riot act. And then she went to he
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: grassed you up. And then she went to grass you
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: up to your own mother.
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: She she I thought i'd escaped it. And I got
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: home and Mammy was there, and she was like, you know,
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: now you know so and so he's at home and
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: he's very sick. Now did you know was he drinking
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: last night? And I was like, mom didn't see him
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: the whole night?
• 27:47
  Speaker 2: Correct, absolutely correct answer.
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah that's how you fucking answer those questions. How you
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: fucking where'd you get the drink? Don't know?
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: Snitches get stitches. Bitches can joke in me? How Darry,
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: that's how you do it.
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: How did you see him last night? Know who were
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: you drinking with? Don't know? Who are you drinking with?
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: Don't know? I got drunk and I forget. It's logical
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: works for me.
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: Wow, fucking wow, he took you down with him, son
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: of a bitch.
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: He did. In fairness, now, I'd say he was getting
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: absolute fucking dog's abuse.
• 28:22
  Speaker 3: But like.
• 28:24
  Speaker 1: Snitch Jerry, No, McBride didn't crack. McBride didn't crack because
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: the only person left the rat on was himself.
• 28:34
  Speaker 2: Well done, though a lot of fellos would have shipped
• 28:35
  Speaker 2: the bed, because mothers can sell you a bit of
• 28:37
  Speaker 2: a story like they have something money, and then the
• 28:39
  Speaker 2: next thing you're going, oh Jesus, here we go.
• 28:41
  Speaker 3: I got.
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, no, an unrelated note, Mommy, I'm okay, I
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: don't want any dinner, and no I'm not even going
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: to stay here and watch Gladiator. IM going to bed. That.
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: You know somebody's bad when he won't watch Gladiators from
• 28:56
  Speaker 2: the Saturday.
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: Drunkest i'd ever been, I'm faid that was very heay Jack,
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: you're last taking this fucking shook me?
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's fairly warm.
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: Well, I think it put a lot of people off
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: alcohol and inter Europe travel.
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, well, look this one's about to possibly I know
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: I give out about America earlier in the show, but
• 29:23
  Speaker 2: this one may put you off Ahead and Vegas. We
• 29:25
  Speaker 2: talked about it twenty four hour at twenty four hour
• 29:29
  Speaker 2: session try a seven day, seven day foot to the floor,
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: pretty much by myself. I we went with a group.
• 29:39
  Speaker 2: We went with a group and to give it just
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: to give a quick beginning and end, we just out
• 29:45
  Speaker 2: of interest as it has nothing to do with really
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: being drunk or whatever. But yeah, it didn't help was
• 29:49
  Speaker 2: that our flight got delayed leave in Vegas. It was
• 29:51
  Speaker 2: twenty two degrees when we left Vegas. We were all
• 29:54
  Speaker 2: geared the nice light clothes flight got the layer.
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: This is this is, this is so clarifying, Tom. This
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: is Las Vegas, right.
• 30:02
  Speaker 2: Las Vegas as in well not not fucking not no, you're.
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: Not Vegas, Vegas island Cork No, no, no.
• 30:11
  Speaker 2: I love the way that that needed clarifying. Jeez. Look
• 30:14
  Speaker 2: I put up the pan trees a whole lot on
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: my green screen just just for this story.
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: I've never been the Las Vegas. I've never not once
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: been so I'm going to open ears on this one.
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna what brought you to the Las Vegas? Kid?
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: We there was a gang again much like the last one,
• 30:30
  Speaker 2: different gang that I was friends with. There were couples
• 30:32
  Speaker 2: and there was there was girls, and there was a
• 30:34
  Speaker 2: gang that were all kind of acquainted. We would run
• 30:36
  Speaker 2: in and it was a single, single blow. Not chicken
• 30:39
  Speaker 2: nor child, had nothing to worry about. And it was put,
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: would you fancy going to Vegas? That sounds very expensive,
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: too far away, you know, And I went, no, no, no, no,
• 30:50
  Speaker 2: such and such as a travel agent. There's a deal
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: going right now, but we need our deposits. Immediately, I went,
• 30:55
  Speaker 2: fuck it, let's go go, let's.
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: Go do it.
• 30:57
  Speaker 2: Very very good money, very good money. I should look
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: at it. It'll be worth a session anyway.
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: Seven days in Vegas is a lot.
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: Though it's a lot, it's a lot. Will The holiday
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: actually turned into like nearly nine days because, like I
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: was saying on the way back, we were all wearing
• 31:13
  Speaker 2: light clothes, but because our flight got delayed leaving, it
• 31:15
  Speaker 2: meant we had to stay two days in America and
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: we no clothes for minus eighteen Jerry Oh, we got
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: to fucking New York. Yeah, so would look again. Thankfully,
• 31:27
  Speaker 2: the travel agent person that was on was able to
• 31:30
  Speaker 2: ring They were old school, they were able to literally
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: ring delta and go this is not fucking acceptable. And
• 31:35
  Speaker 2: we were the only people of the flight who actually
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: got picked up by a fucking limo brought and we
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: stayed in the JFK fucking Hilton, put on the presidential suite.
• 31:43
  Speaker 2: Fucking works. They paid for all our new clothes. Anyway,
• 31:46
  Speaker 2: that was a nice sweet ending. But I'm going to
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: give you one snapshot. There's no point in doing the
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: full week, right, there's no point in telling you.
• 31:53
  Speaker 1: All right, so this is this is Tom in Vegas.
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: It was Vegas, Vegas, Jesus Tom.
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: It's it's it's it's an intense place. There's a lot happening.
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: There's a fucking lot happening. And what do you think
• 32:05
  Speaker 2: you saw on television? Like there's a few bits and
• 32:07
  Speaker 2: pieces and it is. It's in a fucking disastrous, fucking
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: place like it's in this flat plane. I remember the
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: first thing I noticed one of the days. It was
• 32:15
  Speaker 2: there's no road gullies. There's absolutely big wide roads. There's
• 32:18
  Speaker 2: no road gollies. And I remember said asking it's actually
• 32:22
  Speaker 2: driving with is because we have no fucking rain. There's
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: no need in it, like you know. But we saw
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: all the things you got to see, and that we
• 32:30
  Speaker 2: started to disperse because the other gangs wanted to actually
• 32:32
  Speaker 2: go fucking shopping, Like who wants to go on holidays
• 32:35
  Speaker 2: right and go fucking shopping. They wanted to see ship ah.
• 32:40
  Speaker 2: They were coming back with fucking plit through clothes. Now
• 32:43
  Speaker 2: we did our party and stuff, but I'll give you
• 32:45
  Speaker 2: a one snapshot of one particular day. I have a
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: fucking tourst on me and we have a breakfast and
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: just maybe I said, listen, I'm gonnaf for a bit
• 32:56
  Speaker 2: of a fucking wonder. Maybe around lunchtime, I'll go for it.
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: Is you on your own, this is me on my own,
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: go for a wonder. It was lovely. It was like
• 33:04
  Speaker 2: early December, so the temperature was about twenty one twenty
• 33:06
  Speaker 2: crew degree. It's just fucking finest you could eat like jacket,
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: but even would have been lovely, not that horrible. Vegas.
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: Heat numbers were low to you know what I mean,
• 33:15
  Speaker 2: to his grand We were staying in Circus Circus by
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: the way as well, which is the hotel that Tupac
• 33:21
  Speaker 2: got shut up.
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: I've heard of it.
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, one man, it was. I'm sure there is there.
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: A cross on the side of the road, like like
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: he died in an accident. There was.
• 33:34
  Speaker 2: Less myself every time a pastture. Yeah, but I step
• 33:39
  Speaker 2: out anyway and there's I end up. I'll pop into
• 33:43
  Speaker 2: a few different bars. Bars aren't fucking great, a lot
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: of my restaurants and stuff, and I ended up in this.
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: I end up in a Hooters. That's all I know, right,
• 33:51
  Speaker 2: But it's kind of a tame version of a Hooters.
• 33:54
  Speaker 2: It was. It was a tame out like it wasn't
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: what you what. A lot of people think that it's
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: just continued, but it's not. It was just went in.
• 34:00
  Speaker 2: The murderers fucking go on me for fucking wings. And
• 34:03
  Speaker 2: also there was a there was Dale Earnhardt Junior's NASCAR
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: were sitting in the fucking window of it. I said,
• 34:08
  Speaker 2: I want to go in and see that thing. I
• 34:09
  Speaker 2: had about four pints in me now at this stage.
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: Good it was good enough for Dale Earnhardt's Cara exactly.
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: So, and I go and I'm wandering around the place
• 34:18
  Speaker 2: and there's a guy in the cowboy hat. And he's tough,
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: tough looking bastards. Youngly younges enough, but tough looking, looks
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: like he's got He's already taken a couple of slaps
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: in the last few days. I'm going fuck yea, he
• 34:31
  Speaker 2: started starting.
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: Is he staff for Patron, always patron Patron.
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: He's watching looking at the car too, and he says, uh.
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: He explains. I says, you know, we get chit chatting,
• 34:42
  Speaker 2: and is I'm going to the bars? Cool, got a
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: couple of buddies over there. You want you want to
• 34:46
  Speaker 2: sit with us? And she's all right, you're looking with
• 34:49
  Speaker 2: I love no other boys. Turns out the boys were
• 34:51
  Speaker 2: all professional rodeo writers on the national circuit and the
• 34:56
  Speaker 2: rodeo the national Fucking the Stage debate Las Vegas Stage
• 34:59
  Speaker 2: and just finished a day or two previous. The pies
• 35:02
  Speaker 2: had stayed on the rip because there was no more
• 35:04
  Speaker 2: decide of Christmas. They say on the in Vegas. The
• 35:06
  Speaker 2: lads were from Oklahoma. They were from fucking Brazil. There
• 35:09
  Speaker 2: was about fucking eight or nine I kept just eating
• 35:12
  Speaker 2: wings and having the crack, and before I knew it,
• 35:13
  Speaker 2: it was about fucking five or six pints in this
• 35:16
  Speaker 2: Boyce could fucking drink now, and that jack Jack with
• 35:18
  Speaker 2: everyone a whiskey, with every fucking one.
• 35:22
  Speaker 1: That's going.
• 35:23
  Speaker 2: So I did. I gave him the Irish goodbye because
• 35:25
  Speaker 2: these fellows were starting to get fucking messy too. You
• 35:27
  Speaker 2: know what I mean, give the Irish goodbias. So I'm
• 35:30
  Speaker 2: just gonna go over here for now.
• 35:31
  Speaker 3: Look.
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: Wandered out onto the street and I flagged the cab
• 35:34
  Speaker 2: by pure luck. I got in the front, not thinking right,
• 35:38
  Speaker 2: I didn't get into the fucking back. I got in
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: the front. Your man, big, square jaw, square headed, if
• 35:44
  Speaker 2: ever a fella said, Russian mob, fucking gangster written all
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: over this leather jacket. The whole fucking works. You and
• 35:52
  Speaker 2: my friend, you sitting in the back. I went, oh
• 35:55
  Speaker 2: fucking I said, I'm sorry this it's just in Ireland
• 35:57
  Speaker 2: with a and he went.
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: That that guy that gets me Tom. Like the taxi
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: pulls up, you sit on the front and you have
• 36:04
  Speaker 1: a crack with the driver.
• 36:06
  Speaker 2: Well, this is where you think the cowboys and they
• 36:09
  Speaker 2: learn harts juniors. Fucking you think that's where the cracks started.
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: This is where the cracks started, because this guy goes
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: a friend. You're Irish I says, I am yeah Russian,
• 36:19
  Speaker 2: I says, Uh. I said, listen, it's where are you going?
• 36:22
  Speaker 2: I was just had to load the cowboys fucking crazy,
• 36:26
  Speaker 2: fucking best of two fucking two fucking weeks. I've had
• 36:29
  Speaker 2: these guns fucking in and out of my cars, hi
• 36:31
  Speaker 2: and fucking everywhere. I said, listen, I just want to
• 36:35
  Speaker 2: go for a fucking a pint, you know, a normal
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: find me a because.
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: This is Uh.
• 36:42
  Speaker 2: I joined you. Yes, I went, fucking he goes, I
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: knockoff fucking ours ty, I fucking knock off now. I went,
• 36:49
  Speaker 2: fucking all right, fucking sound he goes. Smoke, I went,
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: I'm supposed to do now, sparkling up fags were part
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: on the strip. Off we fucking go. Yeah, two or
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: three pints in this fucking kind of real dive off
• 37:04
  Speaker 2: the strip came right right?
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: Is there anything equivalent to it here in in in Ireland?
• 37:13
  Speaker 2: As fuck? It's not. If everything, if everything else had
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: been a bright, bright fucking set up trying to entice
• 37:21
  Speaker 2: you in. This was actually what I wanted. This was
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: not trying to entice me in. It didn't know. It
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: didn't feel rough in fairness to him, It was just
• 37:27
  Speaker 2: dark Dingen was where people just fucking went for a pint.
• 37:30
  Speaker 2: They didn't get attracted in for any particular reason.
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: Right, okay, so there was no no no show on no, no, no,
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: no exactly, not even not even a lad with a
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: keyboard banging out.
• 37:41
  Speaker 2: One complain anything. All you could hear was fucking lads
• 37:45
  Speaker 2: playing darts and impossibility of a route kicking off every
• 37:48
  Speaker 2: so often. But the fucking crack with this fill because
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: he was stone mad. He'd been in the fucking army
• 37:53
  Speaker 2: in Russia.
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: He well he was.
• 37:57
  Speaker 2: But the onion, you understand, I went obvious what he
• 38:00
  Speaker 2: would correct a right, Jesus hard as fucking nails. But
• 38:07
  Speaker 2: he had all that, all the signs of a spirate
• 38:09
  Speaker 2: and all over it. But on we go, I just listen,
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: should I said, we would go to a fucking other
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: spot of story, you part, not the fucking bit of it.
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: Into the cab. This fucker had three or four whiskeys
• 38:19
  Speaker 2: into the cab. We go, Yeah, yeah, places, uh so
• 38:24
  Speaker 2: on we go, now two or three more fucking bars.
• 38:26
  Speaker 2: Now I'm fucking steaming, but thankfully I don't know chicken
• 38:29
  Speaker 2: wings inside me from hoosters earlier that it's soaking I'm
• 38:32
  Speaker 2: simmer because I'm not trying to keep in with this. Well,
• 38:34
  Speaker 2: he's not drinking beer, he's drinking fucking whiskey and vodka
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: back in drink.
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: I got questions, Tom, Number one, what are you drinking?
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: You say you're drinking beer, and then you're not drinking
• 38:43
  Speaker 1: fucking Schmidtics. You're drinking like Budweis or something.
• 38:48
  Speaker 2: Most of the places had had, like Sam Adams, this
• 38:51
  Speaker 2: is an American fucking beer. Don't know what I'm saying, right, Yeah, yes,
• 38:54
  Speaker 2: most of the places had that, you know what I mean.
• 38:56
  Speaker 2: And if they didn't have that, we'd find something along
• 38:58
  Speaker 2: a lot of lads said decent Guinness. A lot of
• 39:00
  Speaker 2: places that actually have decent Guinness. But I knew I
• 39:03
  Speaker 2: was on an all day sash, so that wasn't fucking happening.
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: That wasn't happening. Well, my other question is is real simple, okay, Tom,
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: Because I know what's always been the fucking ruin of
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: many a poor boy is when you're on the session
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: and your head out into the fresh air, and the
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: fresh air hits you and sort of wakes you up
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: and activates the drink, and it puts you pure, focused,
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: stone matter and the next thing you know, you're down.
• 39:24
  Speaker 1: But there is no fresh air in Las Vegas.
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: No, there isn't. That's a very valid thing. In fact,
• 39:29
  Speaker 2: it seemed to get fucking closier outside because because.
• 39:35
  Speaker 1: Because they've got I'm assuming they're all air conditioned up
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: the ying yangs. So the fresh air is inside the pub.
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, the fresh air is hitting you in the pub,
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: and the hot, moist, warm air that you like is
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: outside the pub. So I'm thinking that the whole drinking
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: dynamic is upside down here.
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: It was wasn't something that was effectively at the time,
• 39:57
  Speaker 2: I think because I was so full of food and
• 40:00
  Speaker 2: in every single bar there was always some sort of
• 40:02
  Speaker 2: fucking food on the go something. There was always a
• 40:06
  Speaker 2: little fucking pastry of some sort. But it followed on
• 40:10
  Speaker 2: from there, and I knew we were coming to the
• 40:12
  Speaker 2: end because your man started getting a fucking out. Everywhere
• 40:14
  Speaker 2: in Vegas. From the night time, you'll hear the sound
• 40:16
  Speaker 2: of cards being clicked off each other, click, click clicked,
• 40:20
  Speaker 2: the really loud fucking sound of cards. And as Fellows
• 40:22
  Speaker 2: basically wanted to give you a card with a girl,
• 40:25
  Speaker 2: a picture of a girl, and brought brought trying, and
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: I see your man, your man, fucking iye, and we're
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: walking up to the next bar. How your man was?
• 40:34
  Speaker 2: He stopped and he fucking took one of the cards
• 40:36
  Speaker 2: and roof. Now I don't know, something crossed my mind
• 40:39
  Speaker 2: as say, this count is going to knock him out
• 40:41
  Speaker 2: because he's on his patch or something, because all of
• 40:43
  Speaker 2: a sudden it became very real that this fellow was
• 40:44
  Speaker 2: a big, square backed, square headed, fucking Russian. And in
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: two seconds and we were in the land of guns.
• 40:50
  Speaker 2: As fella could just fucking off me for no fucking reason.
• 40:53
  Speaker 2: But I was able to ditch him at a point
• 40:57
  Speaker 2: when we went into a karaoke bar and he wanted
• 41:01
  Speaker 2: to sing Brown Girl in the Rain, and I just
• 41:02
  Speaker 2: let I'm not. It's a fucking I can't as well.
• 41:06
  Speaker 2: I'm staying if you fucking not stay, I'm I went look,
• 41:09
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna go on and see kinney and ditched him
• 41:12
  Speaker 2: at that point, left him where he was now. I subsequently,
• 41:15
  Speaker 2: by pure fluke, ran into the guy two days later.
• 41:18
  Speaker 2: But that's no more happened from that. It was grand
• 41:22
  Speaker 2: wandered down, said I'll get him a fresh air and
• 41:24
  Speaker 2: let this fucking drink settle. I was on it because
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: even I was aware the point that the lads were
• 41:29
  Speaker 2: all going out that night, and I did want to
• 41:30
  Speaker 2: meet up with him, but I wanted to fucking stay
• 41:32
  Speaker 2: somewhere fresh. We're talking about eight o'clock, now, nine o'clock,
• 41:35
  Speaker 2: I think, yeah.
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: Will you been fucking drinking since twelve in the day.
• 41:38
  Speaker 2: Jerry had been drinking for four days. At this fucking stage,
• 41:40
  Speaker 2: I was ulterally pickled for the cry.
• 41:42
  Speaker 1: The window for the window for being fresh has closed.
• 41:45
  Speaker 2: No, no, no, listen. I was done, was standing in
• 41:47
  Speaker 2: the ship. I'd been drunk for four days prior to this.
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: This was nothing. I was absolutely fucking pickled with from aldehyde.
• 41:53
  Speaker 2: That's what I was. There wasn't there wasn't a vessel
• 41:55
  Speaker 2: in my body that didn't have alcohol in it. So
• 41:58
  Speaker 2: all I was trying to do was just let some
• 41:59
  Speaker 2: of it fucking thrain into the bottom, do you know
• 42:01
  Speaker 2: what I mean? And not pour out my eye. But
• 42:03
  Speaker 2: I went up and I remember I was watching the
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: fucking Delight and you got favery emotional over the fucking
• 42:07
  Speaker 2: fountain at the BLASO thought was fucking watched about an
• 42:10
  Speaker 2: hour of it, then realized what the fuck was I
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: doing there? But Lo and Behore we ended up meeting
• 42:16
  Speaker 2: up with the gang and I think we went went
• 42:18
  Speaker 2: to Irish brob. We ended up going to this nightclub
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: that was fairly stylish at the time called Jet Jet Jet. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: I think it was a lot of these nightclubs are
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: you have to walk in nearly through a shopping center
• 42:32
  Speaker 2: to get into them, you know, a lot of these places.
• 42:34
  Speaker 2: I think Jet Jet was something similar, you know, but
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: in we went finally got into Jet anyway, and that's
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: everything I fucking hate about a fucking nightclub, do you
• 42:44
  Speaker 2: know what I mean? Twas essentially it would the Real
• 42:47
  Speaker 2: Housewives could have easily been filmed in this kind of
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: a place. Everybody, Like if you think you've seen posers
• 42:52
  Speaker 2: on the night out, you've seen that like this, you've
• 42:57
  Speaker 2: seen fucking not like the eye mean, it was just
• 43:01
  Speaker 2: and this is pre fucking Instagram now, so I could
• 43:05
  Speaker 2: only be a fucking nightmare. Now, I'd say, I'd imagine
• 43:08
  Speaker 2: to go there, But do.
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: You know what it is, Tom, I'd say that I'd
• 43:12
  Speaker 1: say that somebody was out at a night like this
• 43:15
  Speaker 1: looking around at all these people and said to themselves,
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: these people need a social media platform just for themselves,
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: went home and invented.
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: That, literally literally, it would absolutely en captulate this fucking
• 43:29
  Speaker 2: even but does grant a fucking drink of some price?
• 43:31
  Speaker 2: Jesus Christ. I remember, I was actually I nearly sobered
• 43:35
  Speaker 2: up with the fucking price the drink, but I knew
• 43:37
  Speaker 2: this was a fucking banana's place to be. Lil Wayne
• 43:39
  Speaker 2: was there standing up on the DJ box right himself. Yeah,
• 43:43
  Speaker 2: yeah yeah. And next thing he starts making it rain
• 43:47
  Speaker 2: with fivers, right, or is that is.
• 43:49
  Speaker 1: That is that Little John? Little John's Yeah, Lil Wayne.
• 43:53
  Speaker 2: Is Lil Wayne is all fucking tattoos on his face,
• 43:55
  Speaker 2: that's but.
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: Little John looks. Yeah, Little John is the with a sunglass.
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, either way, like you know, maybe it was
• 44:04
  Speaker 1: a little John. Why it was?
• 44:09
  Speaker 2: It could have been because I was fucking buckled. He's
• 44:13
  Speaker 2: fucking fives all over the floor, just fucking pandemonium looking
• 44:15
  Speaker 2: for fives. I've gone, well, the fuck all that anyway,
• 44:18
  Speaker 2: And the next thing, yeah, whatever move I made, I
• 44:21
  Speaker 2: know this will have happened to everybody.
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: Listen this.
• 44:23
  Speaker 2: We both turned together myself in this chap and we
• 44:26
  Speaker 2: hit off each other's drinks and his hit. Yeah, his
• 44:31
  Speaker 2: hit the deck because he's a fucking amateur. Mine was
• 44:34
  Speaker 2: still in the claw. I went, oh Jesus lad, sorry,
• 44:38
  Speaker 2: and then I looked up and I kept on looking up,
• 44:43
  Speaker 2: and then I finally got to his head, how air boss? Sorry? Well,
• 44:48
  Speaker 2: like why are you drinking? On? I won't have it
• 44:50
  Speaker 2: said why are you drinking? And the next thing, this
• 44:55
  Speaker 2: is when ignorance meets vegas. Right, this is when did
• 45:00
  Speaker 2: you ever see a big yolk give animal getting frightened
• 45:04
  Speaker 2: by a tiny yolk because the big yolk has no
• 45:07
  Speaker 2: fucking clue what's going to come next out of the
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: little Well frequently this moment was that because for some reason,
• 45:15
  Speaker 2: the fucking absolute ignoranmus in me turned your man fucking
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: biggest human I've ever seen. I played rugby with some
• 45:23
  Speaker 2: fucking units, but this count was close to sixteen. Monster,
• 45:27
  Speaker 2: big chap. It goes the fuck the fuck you right
• 45:32
  Speaker 2: down into my face and now I mean one stump
• 45:35
  Speaker 2: of his photo that would be no more time.
• 45:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you were gone.
• 45:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but I put the drink down on the counter.
• 45:40
  Speaker 2: I listened to ignorant fucking cunt. I didn't fucking knock
• 45:43
  Speaker 2: your drink, and I'm fucking offered to buy you a
• 45:45
  Speaker 2: fucking drink. If you don't fucking want it, you can
• 45:47
  Speaker 2: fuck off at yourself, right. I mean I went back
• 45:52
  Speaker 2: to SAP with my fucking pint and felt absolutely not
• 45:55
  Speaker 2: like I was winging it, like I was one hundred
• 45:57
  Speaker 2: percent right. Oh like, not even a hint of it
• 46:00
  Speaker 2: in my soul. Did I feel this Cord might just
• 46:03
  Speaker 2: bust me clean, wide open with his lamp.
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, for starters.
• 46:06
  Speaker 2: But then I looked over my shoulder and your man's like,
• 46:09
  Speaker 2: forget this girl. And one he literally wandered off with
• 46:13
  Speaker 2: two lads that were nearly as fucking big.
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: That's you know, Tom, Like, that's the kind of ship
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: you try and share cook not fucking Las Vegas. I
• 46:25
  Speaker 1: had that. I had that one night. I fucking bumped
• 46:28
  Speaker 1: into a guy and spilled his drink and I goes
• 46:31
  Speaker 1: ship again, I'll not have it, said, what were you drinking?
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: He goes a vodking seven up. I was alright, it was.
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: It was a trible volume seven up. I got you
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: can you can just fuck off being smart now you
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: got no drink, lick it off the grindy cart.
• 46:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, well, Tom, I was bigger.
• 46:46
  Speaker 1: I was bigger than that man.
• 46:47
  Speaker 2: Okay, fair enough, fair enough by by a degree of
• 46:50
  Speaker 2: magnitude when you sitting on my shoulders, wouldn't have even
• 46:53
  Speaker 2: been able to have a face to face chat with
• 46:55
  Speaker 2: this man like.
• 46:56
  Speaker 1: You're fucking taking on the fucking uh the month stars
• 47:00
  Speaker 1: from space jam over here.
• 47:04
  Speaker 2: Literally, I don't know what well, I know what it was.
• 47:07
  Speaker 2: It was four days on the rest. It was four
• 47:11
  Speaker 2: days on the rest. And the level of fucking confidence
• 47:15
  Speaker 2: in me to think that this fellow was now he
• 47:18
  Speaker 2: was being a bollocks. There was no need at all. Now.
• 47:21
  Speaker 2: I also don't think he fully understood what the language
• 47:24
  Speaker 2: I was even to speak, because I went very tipperary
• 47:27
  Speaker 2: on that moment. I went, you ignor caught like? I mean,
• 47:32
  Speaker 2: he just he didn't know that was I? Did I
• 47:35
  Speaker 2: have a knife? Was I ninja? Was I going to
• 47:38
  Speaker 2: fucking blow up? He just he just in that moment
• 47:42
  Speaker 2: he went.
• 47:43
  Speaker 1: For all this desirish are crazy?
• 47:46
  Speaker 2: Bro? Oh? Did he? I'd say if I he couldn't
• 47:49
  Speaker 2: have pointed out Ireland on a map the same fellow,
• 47:51
  Speaker 2: Do you know what I mean?
• 47:51
  Speaker 3: It was?
• 47:52
  Speaker 2: That's when you get going to places in Vegas and
• 47:54
  Speaker 2: you say you're from Ireland. You you may as well
• 47:56
  Speaker 2: have said you're from fucking Ireland, Ohio, because it means
• 48:00
  Speaker 2: the same thing to these lads, like they don't give
• 48:02
  Speaker 2: a fuck, the complete opposite to people here in Ireland,
• 48:04
  Speaker 2: like I was talking about earlier, the giving out yards
• 48:06
  Speaker 2: to actually give a fuck about americanisms. Had I said
• 48:10
  Speaker 2: from Ireland, he go, what that means nothing? You literally
• 48:15
  Speaker 2: could have told me your love sandwiches, That's how much
• 48:18
  Speaker 2: I mean today. But I turned back to your man
• 48:21
  Speaker 2: behind for the fuck that to take us up from
• 48:23
  Speaker 2: me a drink, your man behind the bar or never
• 48:26
  Speaker 2: forget he was a fucking Asian that he leaned over it.
• 48:29
  Speaker 2: You're what crazy?
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: What the fuck.
• 48:34
  Speaker 2: The fuck's wrong with you now? Because as the blood
• 48:36
  Speaker 2: was up like it stuff funck now is wrong with you?
• 48:39
  Speaker 2: It's as well, what what bro this fucking size? That
• 48:44
  Speaker 2: guy he's fucking pro fucking whatever. I don't know what
• 48:47
  Speaker 2: he said. He was like he could have been fucking
• 48:49
  Speaker 2: it even monstrous.
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: He had a foot on you, Tom, a full foot.
• 48:53
  Speaker 2: In fairness, your and fairness, young man, gave me fucking
• 48:55
  Speaker 2: free drink for the rest of the fucking even now.
• 48:57
  Speaker 2: I was fairly paisant I didn't need his free drink.
• 49:00
  Speaker 2: But what I didn't grasp was there's always a fucking
• 49:04
  Speaker 2: blowback from any fucking battle situation. Yeah, And I was
• 49:08
  Speaker 2: walking out the door of fucking jest. Now I've gotten
• 49:12
  Speaker 2: chatting to these couple of guests. There was a gain,
• 49:14
  Speaker 2: two girls and two lads, and they'd seen all that
• 49:17
  Speaker 2: unfold and they thought it's the fucking maddest thing they've
• 49:20
  Speaker 2: ever seen in their life. It was literally like a
• 49:22
  Speaker 2: terrier turning on a bull, so that's what literally, and
• 49:24
  Speaker 2: the bull going oh fuck all this and running back
• 49:27
  Speaker 2: to the other side of the shed. They were just
• 49:28
  Speaker 2: so entertained by the moment, and we had a bit
• 49:30
  Speaker 2: of fucking crack.
• 49:31
  Speaker 1: Every bit of me is begging you need to go
• 49:33
  Speaker 1: back to the hotel and go to sleep. Tom right here, So.
• 49:37
  Speaker 2: I mean, I'm hanging around. In fact, I do love
• 49:41
  Speaker 2: a bit of a show. So I'm telling them all, listen,
• 49:43
  Speaker 2: fucking I don't want to fucking you olden. I do
• 49:45
  Speaker 2: enough damage. I fucking hit him fast, you know I'm
• 49:48
  Speaker 2: talking all this shit. They just they're just laughing because
• 49:50
  Speaker 2: I've got an Irish accent, that's all it is. And
• 49:52
  Speaker 2: they hit the fucking road. I can't find any of
• 49:55
  Speaker 2: the gang. Yeah, next see I clock eyes with your man, right,
• 50:00
  Speaker 2: so fuck but I do. Something comes over my brain, Jerry,
• 50:04
  Speaker 2: find the fucking exsit door. Now, Tom, find the one
• 50:07
  Speaker 2: you come in and make a fucking burst for And
• 50:10
  Speaker 2: there's about fucking seven different shapes to the fucking stairs
• 50:13
  Speaker 2: coming down the way. And I'm going, oh Jesus Christ,
• 50:16
  Speaker 2: now you talk about the fucking awave hitting. I was
• 50:18
  Speaker 2: going the other way. I was starting to sober up
• 50:20
  Speaker 2: with fucking fear because I said, this is still vegus.
• 50:22
  Speaker 2: These cons could and your man could literally eat me,
• 50:26
  Speaker 2: literally eat me like in a city. He was that
• 50:28
  Speaker 2: fucking big. Next time I look back up that three slice,
• 50:32
  Speaker 2: the stairs would come down now maybe four.
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: Or five htays in the night club, Tom.
• 50:37
  Speaker 2: And there's your man and the two guys coming down,
• 50:40
  Speaker 2: and then the club was over for another hour. He
• 50:42
  Speaker 2: was following, Oh fuck, I'm fucking fucking dead. Where's my dead?
• 50:47
  Speaker 2: Where's my fucking Russian when I need him?
• 50:51
  Speaker 1: And crackling Rosie and the.
• 50:57
  Speaker 2: Fuck no caps be gotten, fucking nothing, I'm got no
• 51:00
  Speaker 2: fucking Bit's not like there's no real place you can
• 51:02
  Speaker 2: fucking hide and this fellow was tall enough to see
• 51:04
  Speaker 2: over everything.
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: Jesus, you know what, Tom, You're such a massive story
• 51:09
  Speaker 1: you tell one of the first things you established about
• 51:11
  Speaker 1: Las Vegas is how incredibly flat it.
• 51:12
  Speaker 2: Is now now now, ah, for anybody wondered, that's you'll
• 51:18
  Speaker 2: all the time you learn about me. Now, I basically
• 51:21
  Speaker 2: I'm making a film here, Jerry. I'm a fucking hide in.
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: A fucking stapil level level city.
• 51:28
  Speaker 2: What I tell you, Yeah, the fucking seven foot I
• 51:30
  Speaker 2: mean you're you're probably after fucking running it there. Now.
• 51:33
  Speaker 2: I explained that the true story, and this is where
• 51:39
  Speaker 2: good and bad can come from a situation. The bad
• 51:42
  Speaker 2: and my fucking fury was these two fucking monstars, because
• 51:47
  Speaker 2: three month stars coming down the stairs. Out of the
• 51:48
  Speaker 2: good was the gang that thought it was the fucking
• 51:50
  Speaker 2: funniest thing they ever seen, because they came ripping around
• 51:53
  Speaker 2: the corner in our hired red Dodge chart or done
• 51:57
  Speaker 2: like the general fucking league.
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: Are you fucking kid?
• 52:00
  Speaker 2: They had hired it for the fucking weekend. These fucking
• 52:02
  Speaker 2: four kids, what they call the kids, they were the
• 52:04
  Speaker 2: same fucking not much younger than me, came around the
• 52:06
  Speaker 2: corner in to fuck it in in the fucking window.
• 52:10
  Speaker 2: I got fucking like one of the dudes. Nearly up
• 52:14
  Speaker 2: the fucking road. The byes did come. Now they didn't
• 52:15
  Speaker 2: come barreling out, but by fuck they were coming out
• 52:18
  Speaker 2: after me because there's only me, because I was a
• 52:21
  Speaker 2: fucking dead man. Had they knock come around literally thirty
• 52:24
  Speaker 2: seconds thirty forty seconds earlier, and the boys would have
• 52:27
  Speaker 2: fucking eaaten me alive. I would have been fucking warm
• 52:30
  Speaker 2: food out in the desert, I'd say, or at least
• 52:33
  Speaker 2: taken some fucking hide and booted back up the fucking strip.
• 52:36
  Speaker 2: They were all fucking drunk and shouldn't have been driving
• 52:38
  Speaker 2: the car at all up the fucking strip for all
• 52:39
  Speaker 2: she could go, and Circus Circle is a fair all
• 52:42
  Speaker 2: distance down the fucking in the car park into the
• 52:45
  Speaker 2: fucking bar, where there I made right good friends with
• 52:49
  Speaker 2: one of the bar men called Seamus Well. He couldn't
• 52:52
  Speaker 2: fucking wait to hear the story I had to tell you.
• 52:54
  Speaker 2: And the lads came in with me because we all
• 52:56
  Speaker 2: drank beer out of fucking guitar shaped fucking cup glass.
• 53:00
  Speaker 1: It was.
• 53:00
  Speaker 2: It was a good time had by all. I was
• 53:03
  Speaker 2: pison for about fucking a month after that four day
• 53:06
  Speaker 2: fucking binger, one writer, one right, But that was just
• 53:10
  Speaker 2: one fourteen hour period. There was things that I can
• 53:15
  Speaker 2: never speak about again, possibly to you. Will hide in
• 53:18
  Speaker 2: a bunker sometimes, Jerry, and I'll tell you all about it.
• 53:21
  Speaker 2: But that was one fourteen hour period out of a
• 53:24
  Speaker 2: seven day week where I was my drunkest fucking ever.
• 53:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that is the same time, Jesus Christ. So you
• 53:31
  Speaker 1: put no my fucking drunk story. It's a shame to
• 53:33
  Speaker 1: me because you're early.
• 53:34
  Speaker 2: I was.
• 53:35
  Speaker 1: I was on the ninth point and I decided to
• 53:38
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, you know, all my stories are like, well,
• 53:40
  Speaker 1: I fucking had six bottles and I was on the ground.
• 53:42
  Speaker 2: But what has it got to be In any good story,
• 53:45
  Speaker 2: there has to be a fucking yin and the yang.
• 53:47
  Speaker 2: There has to be yan. We were both with the floor.
• 53:49
  Speaker 2: We blow people's fucking brains too early, too many, not
• 53:52
  Speaker 2: like people. People don't do this, don't or have not
• 53:55
  Speaker 2: done the stupid shit I've done. People have done the
• 53:58
  Speaker 2: relatable stuff you've done most And also, by the way,
• 54:01
  Speaker 2: this was your idea of a segment.
• 54:03
  Speaker 1: I gotta tell you it's it's it's so stunning, even
• 54:06
  Speaker 1: fucking mentioned Tupac in the middle of all that and
• 54:09
  Speaker 1: your situation at the end. And I never even get
• 54:11
  Speaker 1: to lay back because I'm always worried up the payback
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: some punk that I roughed up way back, coming back
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: after all these years, I'm getting the ship kicked out
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: of himself in a tip right in the back of
• 54:24
  Speaker 1: Circus Circus. Oh Jesus Christ. Tom, that is insane, Paul,
• 54:27
  Speaker 1: That's that's incredible. That's oh jeez, I don't know. I'm
• 54:31
  Speaker 1: gonna have to dig deep in the world.
• 54:32
  Speaker 2: And I knew the Dodge Charger. You get excited by that.
• 54:36
  Speaker 1: That was my drunkest ever, Jerry. That was my drunkest ever,
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: our drunkest ever story. Tom, She's you know, just listening
• 54:45
  Speaker 1: back to them there now, I'm feeling hungover right now,
• 54:48
  Speaker 1: although mind you, I am right now.
• 54:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I I I still have shudders down my spine.
• 54:55
  Speaker 2: Just listen back to those two mother of divine ge
• 54:57
  Speaker 2: there you go, there you go, And like.
• 54:59
  Speaker 1: I say, just so, just a little throw in there,
• 55:01
  Speaker 1: just a little special there to help us grease the
• 55:02
  Speaker 1: wheels over here, Tom and Jerry Towers, just to keep
• 55:04
  Speaker 1: things moving along. Every now and then, we might throw
• 55:06
  Speaker 1: in and all omnibus I said earlier. If you don't
• 55:10
  Speaker 1: like it, you know what to do. You can tell
• 55:12
  Speaker 1: us all about it on our social media channels at
• 55:14
  Speaker 1: Tom and Jerry show Tom with a he Jerry with
• 55:16
  Speaker 1: a G will get us over on Instagram, where much
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: of the ins and outs are happening these days. You
• 55:21
  Speaker 1: can find me on Blue Sky if you're so inclined
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: at Jerry McBride, Tom o'man he's heart choice is Instagram
• 55:26
  Speaker 1: there himself give us another follow for updates and all
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: Sinan against Cohen. What else do we want these fine
• 55:31
  Speaker 1: people to do? Now? Tom, in their weakened, hungover.
• 55:33
  Speaker 2: States, while you have your device in your handshaken in
• 55:36
  Speaker 2: the fetal position, go ahead and hit five stars. And
• 55:40
  Speaker 2: while you're ratting your Thomas dangling around that's that area
• 55:42
  Speaker 2: of the phone, hit subscribe with the bell along with it,
• 55:45
  Speaker 2: so you get it every single Thursday into your device.
• 55:49
  Speaker 2: If you want to leave a comment, you can, of
• 55:50
  Speaker 2: course on Spotify. It's probably one of the handiest places
• 55:52
  Speaker 2: to do it. Tell us when you were your drunkest ever,
• 55:55
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• 55:59
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• 56:01
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• 56:04
  Speaker 1: We'll be back with our regular schedule programming next week