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ADHD and School: How to Get a 504 or IEP (Even When the School Keeps Stalling) · Raising ADHD: Real Talk For Parents & Educators

• 0:00
  Apryl: I want to tell you about a message I got this week.
• 0:03
  Apryl: A mom of an eight-year-old third grader with ADHD who's medicated.
• 0:09
  Apryl: And last year he was on the honor roll.
• 0:13
  Apryl: Straight A's, but this year, in his favorite subject, science, he has dropped from an A to a 68%.
• 0:21
  Apryl: He's going home drained every night.
• 0:23
  Apryl: He's frustrated with timed mattress.
• 0:26
  Apryl: And the kids at recess are being unkind.
• 0:28
  Apryl: This mom has asked for a 504 or an IEP for three years.
• 0:34
  Apryl: And you know what the school keeps telling her?
• 0:37
  Apryl: Let's try this first.
• 0:38
  Apryl: If you are wondering about a 504 or an IEP, what help your kiddo can get at school, or if you are getting the runaround from the school, this episode is for you.
• 0:49
  Apryl: Today I'm going to walk you through what a 504 actually is, what an IEP actually is, and who qualifies for each one, how you ask for a meeting, and what to do when the answer is let's try this first again.
• 1:03
  Apryl: Let's get into it.
• 1:05
  Apryl: Welcome to Raising ADHD, the podcast for parents and teachers raising ADHD kids.
• 1:11
  Apryl: If you've ever felt frustrated, overwhelmed, or just unsure what to do next, you're not alone.
• 1:17
  Apryl: I'm April Bradford, a former teacher and ADHD mom, and alongside my husband, Dr.
• 1:23
  Apryl: Brian Bradford, a child and adolescent psychiatrist, we're here to give you the clarity, strategies, and support you've been looking for.
• 1:30
  Apryl: Every week we break down the misconceptions, answer your biggest questions, and share real tools you can use right away at home and in the classroom.
• 1:40
  Apryl: So if you're ready to feel more confident and less overwhelmed, you're in the right place.
• 1:44
  Apryl: Hey there, welcome back to the podcast.
• 1:47
  Apryl: If you're new here, this show is where we take the biggest, most confusing parts of raising kiddos with ADHD and we break them down into things that you can actually understand and actually do.
• 1:58
  Apryl: Before we start today, there are two things that I want to talk about because this is a big issue that we're diving into today.
• 2:08
  Apryl: First, I want to say something to the teachers and school administrators who listen to this podcast because I know there are a lot of you.
• 2:15
  Apryl: I want you to know that I love you.
• 2:19
  Apryl: I was you, I am totally on your side.
• 2:22
  Apryl: As you know, I've taught for over 10 years, so I know exactly how hard your job is, and it's just getting harder.
• 2:29
  Apryl: And I know the vast majority of you are trying your absolute best inside a system that is undersourced, understaffed, and asking way too much of you.
• 2:41
  Apryl: Nothing in this episode is about painting schools as the enemy.
• 2:44
  Apryl: That's not my goal here.
• 2:46
  Apryl: Most of the time, when a 504 or an IEP isn't happening, it's not because anyone is trying to be malicious.
• 2:53
  Apryl: It's because the system is overloaded or because a specific person in front of the parent doesn't have the training they should have had.
• 3:00
  Apryl: That is the state of education right now, and that is not your fault as a teacher.
• 3:07
  Apryl: So I don't want you to feel that way.
• 3:10
  Apryl: This episode is about giving parents and teachers information.
• 3:13
  Apryl: This is stuff that I wish I would have known in the classroom as well.
• 3:17
  Apryl: Second, I want to state I am not a lawyer.
• 3:20
  Apryl: Shocker.
• 3:21
  Apryl: This is an educational information, not legal advice.
• 3:26
  Apryl: Everything I'm going to share today comes straight from federal law and from the U.S.
• 3:31
  Apryl: Department of Education's own published guidance.
• 3:33
  Apryl: I'll tell you exactly where to find it, but educational information, not legal advice.
• 3:40
  Apryl: Okay, let's talk about the two plans.
• 3:44
  Apryl: If you have a giddo with ADHD, you should know both of these things, a 504 and an IEP.
• 3:51
  Apryl: We're going to start with a 504.
• 3:53
  Apryl: A 504 plan gets its name from section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act of 1973.
• 4:01
  Apryl: This is a civil rights law.
• 4:03
  Apryl: Its whole purpose is to make sure that a child with a disability is not discriminated against in a school that receives federal funding.
• 4:12
  Apryl: So that's nearly every public school in the country and a lot of private schools as well.
• 4:18
  Apryl: A 504 is a written plan that lists accommodations, which are changes to how your child learns so that their disability doesn't stand in the way of their education.
• 4:30
  Apryl: Accommodations for ADHD might include extended time on tests, chunking longer assignments into smaller pieces, movement breaks, preferential seating, usually near the teacher or away from distractions, written directions in addition to verbal ones, the ability to use a fidget, extra time to transition between activities, access to quiet space when they're overstimulated.
• 4:56
  Apryl: Notice what a 504 does not do.
• 5:00
  Apryl: It does not change what your child is learning.
• 5:04
  Apryl: The curriculum stays the same.
• 5:06
  Apryl: The expectations for mastery stay the same.
• 5:09
  Apryl: What changes is the environment around your child.
• 5:14
  Apryl: That's key here in differentiating the difference between a 504 and an IEP.
• 5:19
  Apryl: So then who qualifies for a 504?
• 5:22
  Apryl: Under section 504, your child qualifies if they have a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activities.
• 5:33
  Apryl: That's the legal standard.
• 5:34
  Apryl: So ADHD absolutely counts for this.
• 5:37
  Apryl: The U.S.
• 5:38
  Apryl: Department of Education's Office for Civil Rights has explicitly said that ADHD should generally be presumed to substantially limit major life activities like concentrating, thinking, learning, reading, and interacting with others.
• 5:52
  Apryl: You do not have to prove that your child is disabled enough.
• 5:57
  Apryl: The law starts with the presumption that ADHD is substantially limiting.
• 6:03
  Apryl: So that's really important to note here.
• 6:06
  Apryl: So remember that.
• 6:07
  Apryl: There are two other things that trip parents up on this piece.
• 6:10
  Apryl: Number one, the fact that your child is medicated does not disqualify them.
• 6:16
  Apryl: Does not disqualify them.
• 6:18
  Apryl: Under the ADA Amendments Act of 2008, the school is legally required to evaluate your child's ADHD as if medication were removed.
• 6:29
  Apryl: So medication is what the law calls a mitigating measure, and mitigating measures cannot be considered when determining eligibility.
• 6:37
  Apryl: So if the school says your kid seems fine to us at school and your kid is medicated at school, that's not a legally sufficient reason to deny an evaluation.
• 6:47
  Apryl: Most schools don't know this.
• 6:48
  Apryl: Most parents don't either.
• 6:51
  Apryl: So put that one down.
• 6:53
  Apryl: Just because they're medicated does not mean that they're disqualified from one 504.
• 6:57
  Apryl: Number two, grades are not the only measure.
• 7:00
  Apryl: A lot of parents are told, well, your child is passing, so they don't qualify.
• 7:05
  Apryl: That's not a standard either.
• 7:07
  Apryl: The standard is whether the disability substantially limits a major life activity, not whether the child is getting a D or an A.
• 7:15
  Apryl: A kid can be earning A's while their disability is substantially limiting their ability to concentrate or to interact socially or to complete work in a reasonable amount of time.
• 7:24
  Apryl: The 504 exists to maintain access to education, not to rescue kids who are already failing.
• 7:31
  Apryl: So think about your after school and homework, things like that.
• 7:36
  Apryl: That also is included here.
• 7:37
  Apryl: It's not just what happens at school.
• 7:41
  Apryl: To help make this easier for you so you can walk into a 504 meeting ready and knowing exactly what your kids need.
• 7:48
  Apryl: I've put together a free resource for you, which is a list of 504 accommodations specifically tailored to kids with ADHD.
• 7:57
  Apryl: If you would like to grab that resource, go to raisingadh.org slash 504 and you can grab it there for free.
• 8:05
  Apryl: I'll also put the link in the show notes.
• 8:08
  Apryl: Okay, let's dive into IEPs now.
• 8:11
  Apryl: An IEP, which stands for Individualized Education Program, gets its name from a different federal law called the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act or IDEA.
• 8:24
  Apryl: IDEA is not a civil rights law, it's an education law.
• 8:30
  Apryl: It's much more robust than Section 504.
• 8:33
  Apryl: An IEP does everything a 504 does.
• 8:37
  Apryl: It includes accommodations, but it also includes specialized instruction, related services like counseling or occupational therapy or speech therapy, measurable goals, progress monitoring, and much stronger legal protections for parents.
• 8:55
  Apryl: So who qualifies for an IEP?
• 8:58
  Apryl: This is where I want to spend some time because this is where I have not completely understood the difference between 504 and IEP and where who qualifies.
• 9:10
  Apryl: And so if I was getting confused as a teacher, I'm guaranteed parents are confused as well.
• 9:16
  Apryl: So under IDEA, your child must meet two criteria.
• 9:25
  Apryl: So criterion number one is they must have a disability that falls into one of IDEA's 13 categories.
• 9:33
  Apryl: For a child with ADHD, the relevant category is almost always other health impairment or OHI.
• 9:41
  Apryl: The regulation defines OHI as limited strength, vitality, or alertness, including a heightened alertness to environmental stimuli that results in limited alertness with respect to the educational environment.
• 9:57
  Apryl: ADHD is specifically named in the regulation as a qualifying health condition.
• 10:03
  Apryl: So if your child is diagnosed with ADHD, they already meet criterion number one for an IEP.
• 10:11
  Apryl: Criterion number two is the big one.
• 10:14
  Apryl: The disability must adversely affect their educational performance to the point that they need specially designed instruction to make progress.
• 10:26
  Apryl: Now I want to bust a myth here because I had this belief myself when I was in the classroom.
• 10:31
  Apryl: I used to think that qualifying for an IEP required something called a discrepancy, that a child had to uh show that they have a big gap between their intellectual ability and their academic performance, like high IQ but low reading scores.
• 10:45
  Apryl: That is not the rule for ADHD.
• 10:48
  Apryl: The discrepancy model is applied to a different category, such as specific learning disabilities like dyslexia.
• 10:56
  Apryl: Even for specific learning disabilities, IDEA 2004 reformed the rules so that the states can no longer require the discrepancy model.
• 11:08
  Apryl: They have to at least allow other methods like a response to intervention.
• 11:13
  Apryl: For ADHD, under other health impairment, there is no discrepancy test.
• 11:19
  Apryl: The question is not is there a gap between how smart your child is and how they're performing?
• 11:24
  Apryl: What they're going to look at and what the question is is does the ADHD adversely affect educational performance?
• 11:33
  Apryl: And does the child need specially designed instruction, not just accommodations, to make progress?
• 11:40
  Apryl: So let's break that down a little bit.
• 11:42
  Apryl: The word aversely is doing a lot in this sentence.
• 11:45
  Apryl: This is where a lot of ADHD only kids get 504s instead of IEPs because the school looks and says they have ADHD, yes, it affects them, but can they still access grade level curriculum with accommodations?
• 11:59
  Apryl: They don't need us to teach them differently.
• 12:02
  Apryl: They need us to make room for them.
• 12:05
  Apryl: For many ADHD kids, that's actually right.
• 12:08
  Apryl: A well-written 504 with strong accommodations is enough.
• 12:12
  Apryl: For other ADHD kids, though, it isn't, especially kids whose ADHD is severe enough that accommodations alone can't bridge the gap.
• 12:24
  Apryl: Kids with co-occurring conditions, so a learning disability, anxiety, autism, dyslexia, dysgraphia, sensory processing issues, kids whose grades are actually failing despite classroom level supports, and kids whose behavior is deteriorating, whose self-esteem is collapsing, and whose school avoidance is starting.
• 12:50
  Apryl: And I know there's a lot of parents who struggle with that school avoidance piece to what so for those kids, an IEP is the right ask.
• 12:59
  Apryl: So here is the clean way, the simple way to think about it.
• 13:05
  Apryl: A 504 is the school promising to change the environment around your child.
• 13:11
  Apryl: An IEP is the school promising to change the education itself, the instruction, the goals, the services, the monitoring.
• 13:22
  Apryl: Both are federal law.
• 13:24
  Apryl: Both are your child's right if they qualify.
• 13:27
  Apryl: And a diagnosis of ADHD is enough to trigger a 504 evaluation.
• 13:32
  Apryl: Whether it's enough for an IEP depends on the second half of that eligibility test, the specially designed instruction piece.
• 13:41
  Apryl: Okay.
• 13:41
  Apryl: So let's talk then about how do you request a meeting?
• 13:48
  Apryl: Because you may be thinking, okay, that's my kid.
• 13:51
  Apryl: They need help.
• 13:51
  Apryl: What do I do?
• 13:53
  Apryl: Here is the process.
• 13:54
  Apryl: Step one, put the request in writing.
• 13:57
  Apryl: This is the single most important sentence in the whole episode.
• 14:02
  Apryl: Verbal requests will get like, oh yeah, I'll, you know, keep an eye on them, or yes, let's try this first.
• 14:10
  Apryl: Written requests actually start the legal clock and can create a paper trail if need be.
• 14:17
  Apryl: You're going to write a short, calm, professional email.
• 14:21
  Apryl: You don't need a lawyer to do this.
• 14:24
  Apryl: You just need to clearly say what you're asking for.
• 14:26
  Apryl: So you're going to write to the principal and ask, like subject line, request for section 504 evaluation, and then go ahead and write the letter requesting for it.
• 14:38
  Apryl: We don't want to treat the school like the enemy.
• 14:40
  Apryl: Remember, we are on the same team here.
• 14:43
  Apryl: So keep this email warm, keep it clear, keep it professional.
• 14:47
  Apryl: You're not attacking anyone.
• 14:48
  Apryl: You're simply making that formal request.
• 14:51
  Apryl: Step number two, who do we send it to?
• 14:54
  Apryl: I mentioned sending it to the school principal.
• 14:56
  Apryl: You're also going to send it to your child's classroom teacher.
• 14:59
  Apryl: And if you can find this person, the district's section 504 coordinator.
• 15:06
  Apryl: Every school district in the country is required by federal regulation to have a section 504 coordinator.
• 15:13
  Apryl: So you may, you know, do some sleuthing on your district's website.
• 15:16
  Apryl: Most parents have never even heard of this person.
• 15:19
  Apryl: Um one thing you can do is if you Google your district name, 504 coordinator, you can usually find that.
• 15:27
  Apryl: Um, or you know, like the search in the district uh on the district website, search for 504 coordinator.
• 15:34
  Apryl: Um, and if you can't, you can email the district office and ask.
• 15:38
  Apryl: Okay.
• 15:39
  Apryl: So why in the world does this matter?
• 15:42
  Apryl: The 504 coordinator sits above the individual school.
• 15:47
  Apryl: They have a compliance responsibility to make sure the district is following section 504 across all of its buildings.
• 15:54
  Apryl: That's literally their job.
• 15:56
  Apryl: So looping them in changes the room a bit.
• 16:01
  Apryl: It's, you know, respectfully you're doing this, but it's also meaningfully because that person is going to take it very seriously because they are legally obligated to do it.
• 16:12
  Apryl: Okay.
• 16:13
  Apryl: Step number three is understand the timeline.
• 16:15
  Apryl: Once you send that written request, the school has to respond.
• 16:20
  Apryl: Section 504 doesn't specify an exact federal deadline for an evaluation itself, but most states and districts have their own timelines.
• 16:29
  Apryl: So often that's 30, 60, or 90 days from parental consent.
• 16:34
  Apryl: So if you are also asking for an IDEA evaluation for a possible IEP, federal law states the initial evaluation must be completed within 60 calendar days of the parental consent.
• 16:46
  Apryl: Some states are shorter.
• 16:48
  Apryl: So what will happen is the school will typically send you a consent to evaluate form and you sign it.
• 16:55
  Apryl: And then as soon as you sign it and send it in, the clerk's the clock starts.
• 17:00
  Apryl: One note here make sure your child gives that form to their teacher.
• 17:05
  Apryl: Remember, ADHD sometimes turning things in is a bit tricky.
• 17:09
  Apryl: Um so uh then they'll evaluate, and then they once the testing and the evaluation is done, and when I say testing, it's evaluation, they will hold a meeting to decide eligibility.
• 17:23
  Apryl: And if eligible, um, they will write that IEP plan or the 504 plan.
• 17:31
  Apryl: You will be included in this meeting, just so you know.
• 17:34
  Apryl: This isn't like a behind-the-doors meeting.
• 17:36
  Apryl: Usually, who is involved in these meetings are the parents, the classroom teacher, um the principal, the if it's an if you're qualifying for an IP, probably the special ed teacher or the 504, at least for our school, the um school counselor is involved.
• 17:59
  Apryl: And then if there are other resources that are going to be needed, such as speech or counseling, or like I said, special ed, those different um categories, those people will be there as well.
• 18:13
  Apryl: Okay.
• 18:14
  Apryl: So now step four, what if they refuse to evaluate?
• 18:19
  Apryl: This one is important to know.
• 18:21
  Apryl: If the school receives your written request and decides not to evaluate, they are required to notify you of that decision and provide you with your procedural rights.
• 18:34
  Apryl: Under IDEA specifically, they must give you what's called a prior written notice.
• 18:40
  Apryl: These are legal documents.
• 18:43
  Apryl: What this prior written notice is, it's a document that explains why they refused, what are their options they considered, and what data they relied on.
• 18:52
  Apryl: So if they refuse and don't send you anything, you can email back and say in one sentence, I am interpreting this as a refusal of my written request.
• 19:02
  Apryl: Please provide prior written notice of this refusal along with my procedural safeguards.
• 19:08
  Apryl: These are legal documents that your school has that they have to provide you with.
• 19:12
  Apryl: So writing them with that one sentence will change the dynamic of everything.
• 19:20
  Apryl: And again, we're not trying to be confrontational here.
• 19:23
  Apryl: We're really just trying to advocate for our kids.
• 19:26
  Apryl: So, you know, try to be friendly, but also be the advocate that your kid needs.
• 19:34
  Apryl: Doing this, it prov it invokes the process the school is legally required to follow.
• 19:40
  Apryl: Most of the time, this is when things start moving.
• 19:44
  Apryl: Step number five, ask for both if it makes sense.
• 19:48
  Apryl: So if your child's situation might warrant an IEP, not just a 504, you can request both evaluations at once.
• 19:56
  Apryl: You'd add one sentence to your email, given, and then give the specific concerns that you're seeing, things like declining grades or need for specialized instruction.
• 20:07
  Apryl: I am also requesting that the school consider whether and your child's name may qualify for an IP under IDEA's other health impairment category.
• 20:17
  Apryl: That's it.
• 20:17
  Apryl: Just that one sentence.
• 20:19
  Apryl: And now they have to consider both.
• 20:22
  Apryl: Okay.
• 20:23
  Apryl: So one thing that I want to talk about here really quick, um, because I saw this in one of the schools that I worked in, um, is RTI or response to intervention.
• 20:38
  Apryl: Some districts also call it MTSS, which is multi-tiered systems of support.
• 20:42
  Apryl: It's the same thing, same idea.
• 20:44
  Apryl: And what it is, it's a framework where the school tries a series of increasingly intensive classroom level interventions before they refer a child for a formal evaluation.
• 20:56
  Apryl: Now, this is not to this is not necessarily a bad thing.
• 21:02
  Apryl: It exists for a good reason.
• 21:04
  Apryl: It was designed to catch struggling kids early and give them extra support, and most importantly, reduce the over-identification of kids for special education when what they really needed was just better instruction or short-term help, maybe for you know, a specific unit or something like that.
• 21:23
  Apryl: Um, but the problem is not the tool, the problem is misuse and misunderstanding of the tool.
• 21:31
  Apryl: RTI becomes a problem when the school uses it as a gatekeeper.
• 21:36
  Apryl: And what I mean by that is as a way to say, we can't evaluate your child until we've tried these three interventions for six weeks each.
• 21:45
  Apryl: Like I said, I've been in a school that that was a that was an issue.
• 21:50
  Apryl: So the problem with this, and what I saw in the classroom, is I had these kiddos struggling, and this drags that out when you think of you.
• 22:00
  Apryl: Know the school year is not that long, or at least when you're a teacher, you're like, oh my gosh, there's so much that they learn in such short amounts of time that to lose three to six weeks without that extra support, it's a long time.
• 22:16
  Apryl: And sometimes this stretches into you know the next school year, and then it all of a sudden is starting over with the new teacher, and then let's try this.
• 22:24
  Apryl: And then the new teacher has to, it just can kind of stretch out.
• 22:29
  Apryl: And that's going back to that story at the beginning of um the episode.
• 22:33
  Apryl: That mom, that's what she was dealing with here.
• 22:36
  Apryl: So here's something that I want to be very clear with.
• 22:41
  Apryl: The US Department of Education has said in writing that schools cannot use RTI to delay or deny a formal evaluation.
• 22:53
  Apryl: Okay.
• 22:53
  Apryl: That is on page 15 of the Office for Civil Rights 2016 Dear Colleague letter on ADHD.
• 23:01
  Apryl: So I want to read the exact sentence from that page.
• 23:05
  Apryl: A school district must not delay or deny an evaluation because it is implementing an RTI process.
• 23:11
  Apryl: Okay, they must not delay.
• 23:14
  Apryl: RTI and a formal evaluation are allowed to happen at the same time.
• 23:18
  Apryl: It's not either or.
• 23:20
  Apryl: If your child is in a tier two or tier three intervention and you have reason to believe there's a disability driving the struggle, you can request an evaluation.
• 23:30
  Apryl: The school cannot say we have to finish the six-week intervention first.
• 23:34
  Apryl: They can continue the intervention and evaluate.
• 23:37
  Apryl: So if the school pushes back with we're doing RTI right now, you can respond again kindly with something like, I really appreciate the interventions the team is putting in and all the hard work you guys are putting in for child's name.
• 23:51
  Apryl: I'd love to continue those.
• 23:52
  Apryl: I'd also like to make a formal request for a Section 504 evaluation since I understand these can proceed in parallel.
• 24:00
  Apryl: Can we start the process while the interventions continue?
• 24:03
  Apryl: So you're not fighting again, you're not making anyone the bad guy here.
• 24:07
  Apryl: You're just naming what federal guidance already allows.
• 24:11
  Apryl: So there you go.
• 24:13
  Apryl: I want to say something here that I really care about and I hope that it lands.
• 24:18
  Apryl: You do not have to walk into your child's school like you are going to war.
• 24:23
  Apryl: And the one of the past few episodes, I talk about this is everyone getting on the same um page together.
• 24:34
  Apryl: We're all on the same team.
• 24:35
  Apryl: Please do not walk into these meetings like you are up in arms for battle.
• 24:41
  Apryl: And I get that some of you have had really bad experiences.
• 24:48
  Apryl: But again, this is a new teacher, new situation, or in the new school year, right?
• 24:55
  Apryl: And I have been in those meetings where the parents are like up in arms, and you know, I I am the new teacher, new year, new teacher, and you know, I hate those type of meetings, and it just I don't know, it's just a bad situation for everyone.
• 25:15
  Apryl: So if you can avoid that, try to avoid that.
• 25:18
  Apryl: I am all for kindness to the king.
• 25:21
  Apryl: Kill them with kindness.
• 25:23
  Apryl: That's my um motto.
• 25:25
  Apryl: So kill them with kindness.
• 25:27
  Apryl: Um, but also you can be an advocate and you can be firm without you know going to war with people.
• 25:35
  Apryl: Okay.
• 25:36
  Apryl: So most pe teachers I know are amazing people, they're great teachers, and they are doing their absolute best.
• 25:47
  Apryl: I can say that the sad thing is there is a very small percent that you know make the rest look bad, and they're the ones that you see on the news and all the things.
• 26:00
  Apryl: Most teachers, and I've said this before in the podcast your child is like their child, they will forever be their teacher's child forever.
• 26:10
  Apryl: You don't forget your kids, like you spend more time with the kids in your classroom than your own kids awake time.
• 26:18
  Apryl: So, um just remember that they love your kid, but they're also carrying 24 other kids, and they are just overwhelmed with the politics of education right now.
• 26:37
  Apryl: It's not a fun game to be in right now, it's not a fun career to be in right now because of everything that is going on, unfortunately.
• 26:47
  Apryl: So please remember that.
• 26:48
  Apryl: With that said, the parents who get the best 504 and IEP outcomes, in my experience, and this is backed up by every advocate I've ever talked to, are the ones who show up as partners, not prosecutors, who bring documents, not accusations, who ask questions in writing, not in ambushes, and who assume good faith from the school unless and until the school gives them a specific reason not to.
• 27:16
  Apryl: You can be calm and persistent at the same time.
• 27:19
  Apryl: That combination of calm and persistent is far more powerful than anger.
• 27:24
  Apryl: Remember, the squeaky will gets the grease, not the angry storming one.
• 27:30
  Apryl: Anger burns hot and fast and lets the school write you off as that mom and that dad.
• 27:35
  Apryl: So calm and persistent is unignorable.
• 27:38
  Apryl: Calm persistent builds a paper trail.
• 27:40
  Apryl: Calm persistent says I'm not going anywhere, and I will keep asking and I will keep documenting and I will keep showing up for my child, but I'm also gonna make this as easy as possible for us to solve together.
• 27:51
  Apryl: That's the tone that we want.
• 27:52
  Apryl: That's how you want to walk into the room for these meetings.
• 27:56
  Apryl: Okay.
• 27:56
  Apryl: So, like I mentioned before, I have created a list of 504 accommodations for you.
• 28:04
  Apryl: And I've also created five questions to ask before you go into your next 504 meeting.
• 28:11
  Apryl: This is all one free download.
• 28:13
  Apryl: It gives you the five specific questions that turn a vague runaround meeting into a focused productive one, including the exact language for what to say when the school pushes back on each one and where each question is grounded in federal law.
• 28:26
  Apryl: It's the thing that I wish I could hand every parent five minutes before they walk into the door of a 504 meeting, and teachers as well, because as a teacher, I wasn't taught these things and I wish I would have known it.
• 28:40
  Apryl: I do believe that special ed teachers know more about this because that's why they go into special ed, that's part of the special ed curriculum.
• 28:48
  Apryl: But for the regular ed teachers, this can also be super helpful for you too.
• 28:54
  Apryl: And the list of accommodations as well, because then you can also advocate for your kids.
• 28:59
  Apryl: I will tell you that another thing, parents, is sometimes your child's teacher is the one advocating against administration saying no, like this child needs this.
• 29:09
  Apryl: So they can also advocate for your kid and come to bat for them as well.
• 29:14
  Apryl: So just another note of being on the same team.
• 29:16
  Apryl: Okay.
• 29:17
  Apryl: So you can grab that free download at raisingadh.org slash 504.
• 29:22
  Apryl: Again, I'll put this link in the show notes.
• 29:24
  Apryl: So before we wrap up, I want to say one last thing.
• 29:27
  Apryl: If you are the parent of a child who is struggling in school and you've been asking for help and you keep hearing, oh, let's try this first, let's try this first.
• 29:36
  Apryl: Hear me out.
• 29:37
  Apryl: You are not being a difficult parent.
• 29:39
  Apryl: You're being your child's parent.
• 29:42
  Apryl: And as the child's parent, sometimes we have to be that advocate that they need, right?
• 29:50
  Apryl: Your child has one shot at third grade or fifth grade or first grade.
• 29:54
  Apryl: The teachers will change, the principal will change, the case manager will change, the classroom will change.
• 29:59
  Apryl: You are the only person in your child's education who cannot be transferred or reassigned.
• 30:04
  Apryl: You are the constant, and that is your power.
• 30:09
  Apryl: You are allowed to ask again.
• 30:11
  Apryl: A no from a 504 team in October is not final.
• 30:15
  Apryl: You can request another evaluation, you can go to this district coordinator, you can escalate.
• 30:19
  Apryl: Most of the time, you won't need to because when you know your rights and you show up prepared and you stay calm and persistent, school meets you where you are.
• 30:28
  Apryl: The schools that my kids have gone to, and for the most part, the schools that I've worked in, they've been really good.
• 30:34
  Apryl: Just know that that most schools I think are pretty decent at working with.
• 30:39
  Apryl: I just have also heard the nightmare stories as well.
• 30:42
  Apryl: So let's hope and pray that yours is just one of the easy ones to work with.
• 30:47
  Apryl: So the whole game is being on the same team.
• 30:51
  Apryl: Now you are informed, you know the law, you know to ask in writing, stay calm and just keep showing up.
• 30:59
  Apryl: You've got this.
• 31:00
  Apryl: I believe that we as parents are our job is to be an advocate for our kids and be able to stand up for what we know that they need.
• 31:11
  Apryl: So that's what this episode is meant to help you do.
• 31:14
  Apryl: And uh, same with that free download.
• 31:16
  Apryl: You can grab it at again, raisingadh.org slash 504.
• 31:22
  Apryl: So take care of yourself, take care of your kiddo, and I will see you in the next episode.
• 31:27
  Brian Bradford: Thanks so much for joining us for today's conversation on raising ADHD.
• 31:31
  Brian Bradford: Remember, raising ADHD kids doesn't have to feel overwhelming.
• 31:35
  Brian Bradford: Small shifts can make a big difference.
• 31:37
  Brian Bradford: If you found this episode helpful, it would mean the world if you would hit subscribe, if you'd leave a review, or if you shared it with another parent or teacher who needs this support.
• 31:46
  Brian Bradford: And don't forget to join us next week for more real talk, practical tips, and encouragement.
• 31:51
  Brian Bradford: Until then, you got this, and we've got your back.