Latest / Repossible / re470: Now What?! From the U.S. to The Netherlands with S.A. Grant

Transcript

re470: Now What?! From the U.S. to The Netherlands with S.A. Grant · Repossible

• 0:00
  Speaker A: But once we met each other, we was like, oh yeah, yeah, like the mag, the magnet. Magnetism was there.
• 0:05
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 0:07
  Speaker A: Find those people. It may not be in your house, it may not be your parents, but find those people. And hopefully those people are leading magnetism into positive because there's negative magnetism as well. Right. But find those people that you are in the same wavelength that challenge you, that push you, someone that you can look up to and they can look up to you and you can kind of have this push and pull. The faster you find those people in your inner circle, the bigger you could explode in the long run.
• 0:33
  Speaker B: Wow.
• 0:39
  Speaker C: Now what? I even have it where I have now what question mark, exclamation point. I don't know why, but I just have those two question mark, exclamation point. Because it's a question. But I also see it as sort of a statement. I think it's a big action moment.
• 0:55
  Speaker A: It'll be interesting once you get to an editor to see how they feel about that.
• 1:00
  Speaker C: I am here today with SA Grand. We are in Utrecht and we have had quite a day already and I am happy to say that we have made quite the decision to have completely taken over this entire lounge and it is basically ours.
• 1:18
  Speaker A: Yeah, I mean it's very Dutch. I mean it is, it is without remorse. So.
• 1:23
  Speaker B: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:25
  Speaker C: So essay Grant with me today and we are talking about now what the big question with an exclamation point. And I am. I have a soft spot. Soft spot in my heart for now what when it comes to their international moves. And that's how you and I know each other. We're here in the Netherlands. We're both American. American born. And you have recently, well compared to me recently moved here and I would like to one reason this whole now what topic comes about is again we talked earlier about villains and heroes and guides and I like to be a guide to help people make a big move and have that now what decision and help them with the decision making. And there are tiny little ones and there's big ones. Like today we're talking about a big one moving from the US to here. It's a biggie. But as maybe we'll get into because as I know a little bit more of your story that it's possibly other decisions or events that happened that turn that story into how did that story come about? It's not usually just a simple oh, we woke up one day and we decided to move to the Netherlands. So SA Grant, it is great having you here and I'm really glad you moved here, by the way, because it's been great getting to know you a little bit more. And could you give us a little bit of background on you? You were in the States. To put it super simply, you were in the States and now you're here.
• 2:57
  Speaker A: Yeah. To do a little add on to what you said of being American born. Unfortunately, I wasn't born.
• 3:03
  Speaker C: That's right. I read that in your bio in our mutual book. This is also another way how we know each other. We were both contributors to unexpected gifts.
• 3:12
  Speaker A: Yes. I kind of look at it as far as legacy, if that makes sense. I mean, everything I do at this point in time, post my event of life after death situation happened.
• 3:22
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 3:23
  Speaker A: Was trying to figure out what breadcrumbs am I going to be able to leave behind for the next generation. And when I look back in it, like, I was born in Trinidad and Tobago.
• 3:32
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 3:33
  Speaker A: And my mom, for reasons, decided to leave when I was not even a year old.
• 3:39
  Speaker B: Wow.
• 3:40
  Speaker A: So am I American?
• 3:42
  Speaker B: Right?
• 3:43
  Speaker A: Yes. But was I born there? No. Okay, so this is kind of like going back into the code of copy and paste. Right. My mom left, moved to America.
• 3:54
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 3:55
  Speaker A: And then I left America and moved to Netherlands. So it's kind of like history repeating itself to a certain extent.
• 4:01
  Speaker B: Wow.
• 4:02
  Speaker C: You know, that was. Well, that'd be fun to interview, to find about. About that now. What?
• 4:09
  Speaker A: Yeah, it's. It's definitely interesting.
• 4:10
  Speaker C: Okay.
• 4:11
  Speaker B: All right.
• 4:11
  Speaker C: That's for another. That's for another episode. So your story then. You've been. You've been here how long now?
• 4:17
  Speaker A: Roughly 14 months.
• 4:19
  Speaker C: Okay.
• 4:20
  Speaker A: Yeah.
• 4:20
  Speaker C: It's funny when it's like babies.
• 4:23
  Speaker A: Yeah. You look at it.
• 4:24
  Speaker C: How old is your baby? 36 months. Okay. I'm no longer a parent. How many years is that? Come on.
• 4:27
  Speaker A: Well, I will say, how good is your Dutch? Do you speak like a 14 year old? Like, are you a baby or are you more like a toddler? So I'm definitely 14 months old.
• 4:40
  Speaker C: I love it. But my level of Dutch I am here. We're counting weeks. We're doing weeks still.
• 4:45
  Speaker A: Yes. Yes.
• 4:46
  Speaker C: Okay. So you've been here 14 months and congratulations. You said you got your daft with the Dutch American Friendship Treaty. I think it was like 1956, a treaty between the US and the Netherlands, which makes it, I'm going to say, relatively easier.
• 5:04
  Speaker A: I mean, it's kind of what we're talking about, right? I mean, it's loopholes.
• 5:07
  Speaker C: It's loopholes, yeah. How do you know? How do you make things work? And sort of where there's a will. You ever hear the joke, where there's a will, there's a relative.
• 5:19
  Speaker A: Or marriage.
• 5:23
  Speaker C: So you made it happen.
• 5:25
  Speaker A: Correct.
• 5:25
  Speaker C: So how did that come about? And it wasn't just you woke up one morning, I'm gonna move to the Netherlands.
• 5:30
  Speaker A: No, I mean, it really started in Spain, believe it or not.
• 5:33
  Speaker C: Oh, wow.
• 5:34
  Speaker A: My wife and I, we in the company she was working with, they had a international event because they had just bought a new company and they had a celebration in Spain where all the European countries in the US country and everybody came into one and we were like, Barcelona is. Wow. We gotta move to Europe.
• 5:50
  Speaker B: Wow.
• 5:51
  Speaker A: And kind of being a believer in if you talk it and you believe it and you start taking action towards it, it'll happen. And then the opportunity kind of fell into our lap to where, hey, you could either move to Sweden, uk, Netherlands, or the other one, which is Estonia.
• 6:13
  Speaker B: Okay. Yeah.
• 6:14
  Speaker A: Out of those four, Netherlands sounded very appealing. And it still is appealing to this day. So.
• 6:22
  Speaker C: Okay, you just. You glossed over there kind of the where there's a will, there's a way thing, or you talk about it, because how many people travel to a place and when they're there, they say, hi, honey, I want to live here. Let's move here. And I can. I was gonna say guarantee. I can't guarantee. There's gotta be. It's gotta be more than 99% of the people who say that, who don't actually do it. So what's the difference? See, this is sort of my now what? Premise here, because I think that now what is. And it's a little bit. Sorry, not sorry, because it's my idea is for the decision makers, for the action takers. It's not now what? Let's think about it some more. Now what? Let's wish upon a star. I want now what. And then the action has been taken because a dear friend of mine talks about. Share from the Is it the scar and not from the wound?
• 7:24
  Speaker B: Right.
• 7:25
  Speaker C: Like it freshly. If you just arrived here, then your now what? Story would be not quite totally formulated. You're here, but now it's done. You're still here and you got your daft so you can stay longer.
• 7:41
  Speaker A: Correct.
• 7:41
  Speaker C: And so when I say you glossed over, but you said we wanted to come here and now we're here, that's a monster. It's a huge mountain.
• 7:51
  Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, it's one of those things to where when I said we had the opportunity, we dialed in to make the Opportunity happen. My wife's company so happened to be a big contributing factor to Europe.
• 8:05
  Speaker C: Okay.
• 8:05
  Speaker A: And they bought the European aspect. The US Company bought the European country company. And then I was like, okay, that's our gateway.
• 8:13
  Speaker C: Was that in Spain?
• 8:15
  Speaker A: Well, Spain was one of their hubs.
• 8:17
  Speaker C: Okay.
• 8:17
  Speaker A: But the actual main hub is actually based out of Sweden.
• 8:22
  Speaker C: So is that where the Spain, Sweden, Netherlands, Estonia came from?
• 8:26
  Speaker A: Correct.
• 8:26
  Speaker C: Okay. Curious about that.
• 8:27
  Speaker A: Once we, once we figured out, okay, well now you. It's Sweden owned. And what's the next steps to kind of get here? So my wife started positioning herself because, I mean, originally she was a treasurer. Well, a cpa, an accountant before became a treasurer, and then now with the understanding transactions was her thing. So she used to do a lot of microtransactions in the States because the company that she works for does parking. So they're more so transactions based on parking. They don't own the parking meters, they don't own the parking spots. They just do the transactions. And then through the mergers, they started to get these other things and they needed a whole, we have us and we have Europe. We need someone at least understands the US market to bring them into Europe. So I was like, okay, that's the skill migrant route.
• 9:11
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 9:12
  Speaker A: So on that visa, skilled migrant visa is what brought us here. The daft visa is what's going to then separate us from that and keep us here. Because again, if she decides to leave, if anything goes wrong with that employer, then that visa is void.
• 9:27
  Speaker B: Right.
• 9:27
  Speaker A: So staying ahead of the curve, the daft visa steps into place. And in worst case scenario, I could hire her as an employee under my company, much like what we're doing with our son, bring him in as a dependent as well, because that's the other part of this equation. Our son came over here to go to school as well, because he was 18 at the time. He's an adult, so he can't be a dependent. So finding out all these different nuances and loopholes again, studying and figuring out the dots.
• 9:55
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 9:56
  Speaker A: Connecting the dots is where we are right now.
• 9:59
  Speaker B: Wow.
• 10:00
  Speaker C: Okay, I'm gonna. I'm gonna come back to Barcelona again because just because I hear it all the time, because I. I live in Europe. You live in Europe. And I don't know how many American friends of yours say this, but they come over there. I want to live here. And so many say it, but so few do it. And you mentioned loopholes, and you mentioned dots and dot in the I's and crossing the t's.
• 10:24
  Speaker A: A million analogies Right.
• 10:25
  Speaker C: A million. And still I'm trying to think of. So the listener, the viewer says, like, okay, wait a minute. I missed the part where he says, Barcelona sounds great.
• 10:39
  Speaker A: Yep.
• 10:39
  Speaker C: Which we all say, because Barcelona is great.
• 10:41
  Speaker A: It's beautiful. Yeah.
• 10:42
  Speaker C: Beautiful. And now you're living here.
• 10:45
  Speaker A: Yes.
• 10:46
  Speaker C: It's almost like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Could you rewind? You know, wait a minute. What happened in the. How. What's the difference then between you're there and you say, this is great to you're actually here? There's got to be a bigger drive than just.
• 11:01
  Speaker A: It's a. It's a way of thinking. It's a way of. I would say look at it from the standpoint of if I. If you say that I'm going to become a published author.
• 11:10
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 11:11
  Speaker A: And you say that every single day. And every day you take a little bit of writing or a writing class or you start going to conventions, and you just start putting yourself in that space. Eventually, if you stick to that path, you will become a published author. So for us, it was the same thing. We kept on traveling and traveling, and every time we would travel, be like, we have to. We have to figure out. We have to figure it out. To figure it out. And then. I hate to say it, but it sounds like Houdini in a bottle. But we kept on saying it. We kept on staying positive for it. And then once the opportunity presented itself, we was like, okay, now how do we align to this opportunity? It's not Barcelona, but it's Europe. How do we connect these dots and make this happen? So once the opportunity presented itself, then getting my wife in alignment. Right. And then she was like, okay, I'm going to get this promotion. This promotion is then going to lead me to then being a requirement to be overseas. So, again, you know, I wouldn't say she's a chess player, even though she is, and she doesn't believe it. But I'm a chess player.
• 12:07
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 12:07
  Speaker A: And the combination, both of us, we were just. Okay. Just dialing in. Okay. We're going to go through you as a channel. We're going to get there. Once we get there, then we're going to leverage me to keep us there. So it was 100% premeditated, if that makes sense.
• 12:20
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 12:21
  Speaker A: But again, it's sticking to that path of we're going to do it, we have to do it. We need to figure out how to do it. And then once the opportunity presents itself, knowing that the opportunity is there, and then seizing the opportunity.
• 12:32
  Speaker C: Okay, so this is More than Barcelona is pretty. What was the deeper. What's the word? Desire? Is it dream or Dream always sounds so fluffy, right?
• 12:45
  Speaker A: I just look at it from a standpoint of if you look at humanity as a whole, right? And this is a statement that I think I'm gonna die by, right? It's a statement that I say, and I live by. If you think about nomads, we wouldn't have been in America or Trinidad or in Europe if none of us were ever nomads to begin with. That's human nature. So to be gridlocked or stifled or stuffed into one region of the world, that's. Yes, it's capitalism, yes, it's the biggest country supposedly. But ideally there's a couple hundred other options that you have to kind of test to see if you like or you don't like. You can't just look at National Geographic, you can't just look at a magazine, you can't read about it. You actually have to go. And once you go in the experience, you're just like, America is great, but the world is greater. Wow.
• 13:40
  Speaker C: You know, wow. The whole nomad thing, you kind of took me off guard there because I think I, you know, we've had a few conversations today and you've said these things that just. I really like how you phrase things and make it. You give me this clarity like this nomad and this idea that people, humanity to travel and to experience another place and in more than the two week Hilton holiday, 100% and. Cause that's a huge. Not many people do what you've done.
• 14:11
  Speaker A: But I think if you think about it, everyone from the Netherlands wants to go somewhere else. Everyone from the US it's the native being of wanting to be a nomad and not realizing that's what got you there in the first place. And embracing that. And most people, they don't comprehend the embracing of it. They just feel something, but they don't know what that is. And for us, right away I was like, well, if I spent 40 something years here and based upon technology, based upon where we are right now, I could spend another 40 something years alive on this planet. Why the hell would I do it in one location? And we're trying to get to Mars and I haven't even explored this planet yet, I'm doing myself a disservice, I'm doing my kids, my grandkids, a disservice by saying, this is it, this is it. I mean, yes, you can grow up on a farm and you could live in Texas and spend your entire legacy of four generations there. But what would that look at at scale? And you have to be the first one. And I told my wife, I'm like, you're not the first one to do it. You're just the one to do it. In this generation, you're the aunt or the cousin that lives abroad now. You're part of their storyline and say, yeah, I got a cousin that lives there. And every one of you think back in time, oh, I have a cousin that lived in France or a cousin that lived in Asia. We're just in that equation now. We're that factor to be the inspiration for. Hopefully two, three generations down, somebody would be like, hey, I'm moving there because my aunt did it or my cousin did it or whatever did it before me.
• 15:36
  Speaker C: Remember earlier we had a conversation about that kind of person does this kind of thing. And you are now the kind of people who do this kind of thing. You are the kind who move to another country 100%. And it is no easy task.
• 15:52
  Speaker A: It's not. It's not designed for everyone. You know, I think that's why you kind of have survival of the fittest, right? Goes into being a nomad. You go back to historically, if you're not willing to put the time in and the effort to learn how to hunt or to at least marry someone that knows how to hunt, then you kind of get X'd out, right? You kind of fade to black. If you don't know how to put clothes on, you don't know how to make shelter, you eventually fade. So for us, it's like, I look at it as a survival technique. It's kind of like teaching not maybe our kids, but maybe their kids or maybe their. Their kid kids an opportunity to say, well, how did we end up in the Netherlands? Or how did we end up in Europe? And like, again, wait, you're saying that my mom was. Or my grandmother was American? Why am I here? And then that opens up that book to realize that everything is bigger than where you are right now.
• 16:39
  Speaker B: Wow.
• 16:42
  Speaker C: You know, to my. My mom and dad, they met on a very romantic story. They met on a ship going to Germany from the States. Yeah, you're right. You're right. And they did a. Like a summer exchange or something like that. And I'm still friends with the family my mom stayed with. And so my mom's ancestors were German, my dad French. We don't know much about my dad's side, but my mom's ancestors, they were German and they came to the States and on trips growing up as a kid, my mom would read these letters in German. Actually, she would translate them, but in German from, you know, great, great grandfather, whoever. And they would be talking about, oh, the price, and they moved to Oklahoma, and they'd be talking about the price of corn or something like that, and they'd be writing letters to each other. And for some reason, I just thought about that. I hadn't thought about it the way you're talking about it with the whole, aunt this and grandpa did that. Because now you are the ones who moved to the Netherlands.
• 17:53
  Speaker A: Well, we're not the first. I mean, like, in my bloodline, for example, like, my dad's grandfather is from Ireland. So, like. And as you ask these questions to your family, like, who is he? They barely know his name. They. They moved from Ireland. He was in islands, and that's how he met your grandma. And it's just like, all these different things, but it's like being a descendant of that. It's. It's part of who we are. So why would I not kind of come back over here and restart that? But now what we do, writing books and podcasting, we have the breadcrumbs of technology to. Then once I'm dead and gone, they can at least hear my thoughts and my processes and why and what and how. And then now leverage that to become who they're, who they want to be, versus, I'm still thinking about, what was my grandfather like? What was he like? You don't have to wonder now.
• 18:45
  Speaker C: Yeah, well, you're right, because we had a few letters from Grandpa, Grandpa whoever, great Grandpa whoever, I don't even know his name. And they literally wrote about, like, corn prices. Their letters were not all very exciting. It was fun. Fun. But I really like what you're saying as well, about how, like, what we're doing right now, 100%, we're telling our stories about why we did things. And that's very much this. This whole title of this theme of my project is all now what? And I. My goal is to sort of inspire others to think of their now what? Moment. You. You've got several that built up to you coming here and how can we help others? Because I really think that the audience is. The majority of the audience is going to listen to this or watch this, and they're going to say, wow, that's great. That's so great for these guys. And they did this. And like, you know what? That's just not me. Or if maybe if they're Honest with themselves or maybe they, they think like, well, that sounds great, but I'm never going to actually do it. And that's totally fine. Like I said, four generations on Texas farm. That's awesome. Nothing against that, but I think, you know, in marketing, it's marketing, guys, as we know, there's your ideal target avatar, your audience, who's really, who you're really focusing on. I think for me anyway, it's. It's the one who's just hungry to do that thing, to make that change and maybe just needs a push or a roadmap or a nudge or I like to talk about pull, to do that thing, to have that now, what moment for them. We're talking about ours, correct? And how can we inspire others? So if there's people listening who have thoughts of where, where you were at some point back when it was still just a dream and a thought and a vague idea, how can they become the type of person who does this type of thing?
• 20:43
  Speaker A: But to your point, I don't think everyone that may come across this conversation or this content may not be the right person, but based upon the rules of numbers, they know the right person. That right person is in one of their circles. They could be watching this and kind of flipping through YouTube or whatever channel they're looking at it on and it may be the 8 year old kid that's in the background listening right now without them knowing. And then a few years go by and this 8 year old kid becomes a 13 year old kid, starts talking about, hey, I would like to do traveling abroad for education. Like all of these things are in every single circle. And if you're not the person, I would say if you know the person or if you have a seed of that person, feed into it. Their fears are not your fears. Your hesitation are not their hesitation. So you don't want to hold someone back. And it kind of goes into being fathers, that we are men, right? I would love my kid to be on the farm with me. I would love my kid to do what I do. But in reality, who is an actual son that wants to be exactly like their dad, right? No matter how great the dad is, you could be the rock and your kids are gonna be like, I'm never gonna wrestle. So it's one of those things, whatever that person wants to do, feed into it, man. You'll be surprised how much of you would become part of them if you just feed into it. Like a lot of times I said it with my son, he's not into Digital marketing. Right. He's really big into the market. He's, he's really big into development. So when I started to see that, I was like, okay, well he's not going to be the creative mind, he's the analytical mind.
• 22:27
  Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, I'm 50.
• 22:28
  Speaker A: 50. He's 100% analytical.
• 22:30
  Speaker B: Yeah, yeah.
• 22:31
  Speaker A: I can kind of understand 50% of them.
• 22:34
  Speaker B: Right, right, right, right.
• 22:35
  Speaker A: So I'm just gonna have to feed into that 50%. If you need help with the code, if you need. That's my gift. Let me help you with that. Everything else, the other 50% that I may not be able to understand, that's going to be for you and designed for you to then pass on to the next generation. I can only help you with what I know and what I don't know. You should be able to find out on your own and build your own legacy. I'm just giving you what I have.
• 22:58
  Speaker B: Yeah, yeah.
• 22:59
  Speaker C: No, you, you mentioned this 8 year old kid in the background. I think that's really cool that if you're, if you're listening or watching and you think, wow, that's not me, but my nephew.
• 23:10
  Speaker A: There's always John.
• 23:11
  Speaker C: Yeah, he loved this. And then I'm sharing this with him because I'm sure we all have inspirational people along the lines and I bet a lot of it's just sort of in the background or something.
• 23:23
  Speaker A: It's not always in the background getting.
• 23:24
  Speaker C: Sat down by grandpa saying, son, grandson, you're going to move to the Netherlands. I don't think it happens like that.
• 23:31
  Speaker A: It doesn't. I mean, if I think about it historically for myself, my dad used to listen to motivational tapes. I don't remember who. Really, I didn't, I don't remember who the hell he was listening to. Absolutely. It could have been Les Brown. It could have been people that I know today. But as a kid I didn't know who they were. So for me to be on that pace now, where I'm standing on stages and having conversations and helping people learn how to do things.
• 23:53
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 23:54
  Speaker A: It could have been subliminally back from back then. And did my dad achieve it? He didn't achieve it, but I'm achieving it now. Right. So then that little shift of that secondary information through osmosis or just being in the background, it definitely pans out more than you could think about it because again, you're talking about 30 years of time. Right?
• 24:13
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 24:14
  Speaker A: And it's difficult for anyone to comprehend that magnitude of cause and effect.
• 24:18
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 24:18
  Speaker A: But I can Tell you that I remember some of those elements. Those are the key memories that were mediocre memories at that point in time.
• 24:25
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 24:26
  Speaker A: That I can remember and recall now.
• 24:29
  Speaker B: Wow.
• 24:30
  Speaker C: That's so cool that your dad listened to tapes.
• 24:33
  Speaker A: He did. He had the cassettes and then he had the CDs. And I can always see his mind wanting to be an entrepreneur but not understanding what an entrepreneur is or what. What it should be doing. But I can see that strive for it. Was he successful at it?
• 24:52
  Speaker C: No.
• 24:53
  Speaker A: But in who I am now, what I'm doing, I've had probably 10 times more success than what he's done. But that's a fragment of who I am to make me who I am now, if that makes sense. It's causing. Everything is cause and effect. It's cause and effect.
• 25:08
  Speaker B: Wow.
• 25:11
  Speaker C: You know, I've told you this before, but I'm so visual, and I just. So many things you say, I just. I can just see them. I just. I. For some reason, I just see your dad listening to tapes and you there in the background or somewhere else instead.
• 25:23
  Speaker A: Of sketching in a book or playing with toys. You know, it's. And again, I don't know if it's. I don't have a photographic memory, but I have enough of a memory to be like, my intellectual side is like, the connection between the two. It's like, ah, so what would life have been like if that wasn't part of the equation, then.
• 25:41
  Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah.
• 25:42
  Speaker A: And again, it wasn't like I was sitting in the room and he was forcing me to sit there to listen to it.
• 25:46
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 25:46
  Speaker A: It was just. I'm just in the room.
• 25:48
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 25:48
  Speaker A: And I'm seeing what he's doing, and I'm not understanding it because I'm a kid.
• 25:52
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 25:53
  Speaker A: But when you look back, 20, 20 me, in hindsight, you're just like, holy. That's part of a factor of who I am right now.
• 25:59
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 25:59
  Speaker A: Without even thinking about it.
• 26:01
  Speaker B: Wow.
• 26:02
  Speaker C: I remember my mom saying something like, you know, you can do whatever you want to do, just put your heart into it and work hard, or something like that. And I've never forgotten that. I've always said, well, my mom said I could do it. Guess I can do it, right?
• 26:14
  Speaker B: Yeah. Well, yeah.
• 26:16
  Speaker A: Why can't you?
• 26:18
  Speaker C: I also like your sort of idea of this whole background thing where something's happening and it's not so deliberate or direct.
• 26:24
  Speaker A: It's indirect.
• 26:25
  Speaker C: Indirect.
• 26:26
  Speaker A: There's so many times that that has happened. Like, I remember when I first learned about Dean Martin.
• 26:32
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 26:32
  Speaker A: And I was going through my Dean Martin phase, listening to it. Big piece of pie in the sky, that's amore. And then sure as hell not realizing that I was doing it in the car, driving my son back and forth to school. Even last week, I went to the kitchen, and my son's playing Dean Martin, and I'm just kind of like the secondary. It's like secondhand smoke gives you cancer. Secondhand motivation kind of gives you inspiration, if that makes sense.
• 26:59
  Speaker B: Wow.
• 27:02
  Speaker C: All right, so that's for our listeners and viewers. Let's just play this in the background. Have it going at Thanksgiving dinner, listening to Bradley and Sa talking. And you never know who's gonna be listening in the background.
• 27:14
  Speaker A: You never know. We never know.
• 27:16
  Speaker C: That's really cool. I like that. I like the whole indirectness of it.
• 27:19
  Speaker A: Yeah. Because it's not forced. Yeah, it's not forced. It's just kind of as from a kid standpoint, you can kind of see the. Either the passion or the enjoyment.
• 27:30
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 27:31
  Speaker A: From a parent that you don't want to be like. Right, right. And then sure as hell, by default, you just kind of. I know my son doesn't want to be like me.
• 27:38
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 27:39
  Speaker A: But then when I see him listen to Dean Martin and I'm like, the last time I played that with you, you were like six, seven years old. You're 19 now. Nature versus nurture.
• 27:49
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 27:49
  Speaker A: I think nurture definitely has a more of a huger effect than we could realize.
• 27:53
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 27:54
  Speaker C: You know, it's funny about the kids. And I talk about. We both have boys. You have a boy, I have two boys. And I often say how they. They don't listen, but they hear 100%. And then there's another one, especially with boys, is that if you have a conversation face to face, that's way too confrontational.
• 28:12
  Speaker A: It is.
• 28:12
  Speaker C: And so it's better if we sit. Ideal is car you're driving or he's driving and you're side by side. And it's like they say about kids. Like, what do they say about kids? We're playing together or co playing, whatever. And so now we are two people going forward, and we happen to be having a conversation, but there's not that confrontation of the face to face. Like, son, let me tell you. And it's the more just a casual conversation, and somehow that blocker isn't up.
• 28:47
  Speaker A: Yeah. And I think it's actions, too, because, you know, we have a daughter as well, too. We're a blended household. And so I've been around her for, like, last eight years of her life, right? So like 12. And now she's, you know, going into B21 and seeing. When she reaches out to me is based upon what she seen me do. So she reaches out to say, hey, I got a problem with the car. Because she see me working on the car.
• 29:10
  Speaker B: Yeah, yeah.
• 29:11
  Speaker A: Hey, I'm. I'm installing this TV on the wall because she seen me install five TVs in our house when we lived in Cobb. Right. So it's cause and effect. It's what you do routinely. And then they reap the benefits of it. Her TV was mounted on the wall. She's sitting there in high school, in middle school, watching TV on the wall. I never would have thought that while she's a junior in college, she would reach out and say, hey, I need some insight on mounting the TV on a wall. That whole indirect. What you do is more achievable than what you're stating or what you're telling them to do.
• 29:40
  Speaker B: Yeah, yeah.
• 29:42
  Speaker C: You know, I don't know if this is related, but we. We lived here, and. And then we wanted to go to Morocco on holiday.
• 29:48
  Speaker A: Okay.
• 29:49
  Speaker C: And both the boys said, I don't want to go to Morocco. Where's Morocco anyway now? Like, North Africa. Why would we go there? That sounds like a stupid place to go. They both didn't want to go. And then we get there, and we have a. We have a great time. And then. But they didn't admit it. And only later did I remember overhearing my son saying, like, oh, we went to Morocco.
• 30:09
  Speaker B: It was the best.
• 30:11
  Speaker C: It was like, the best holiday we ever had. I love Morocco.
• 30:14
  Speaker A: You got to go to Morocco.
• 30:15
  Speaker C: We're like, what?
• 30:16
  Speaker A: It's always crazy when you hear that second again. They don't know that you're listening.
• 30:20
  Speaker B: Right?
• 30:20
  Speaker A: And so, like, for us, it was when we took our parents and our kids to Paris, Netherlands, and London, and our son, he didn't want to go.
• 30:32
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 30:32
  Speaker A: And sure as hell, after we come back, I hear him on his phone with his maternal grandparents that. Telling him about the stories of what he learned and how exciting it was and all that. And I was like, you little shit. Like, you give us all this hard time on the back end, and then on the front end, you're, like, celebrating about how great it was, how grandiose it was, how important it was for you and how you enjoyed it. And you just kind of sit back and be like, they don't want to be us, but they don't understand that who they are is elements of Us. And because what we've delivered and given them the opportunities to. To experience, it's evolving them to become whoever they're going to be.
• 31:07
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 31:08
  Speaker A: But again, they're not gonna tell you because you're a parent.
• 31:10
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 31:12
  Speaker C: You know, some sort of a grammar geek. And words. And so I remember my now what? Question mark, exclamation point. And I think this is quite fitting because today I didn't know where this conversation was gonna go. And I like this whole indirect idea because I think this whole confrontational, direct thing, maybe it doesn't work right. If I say, you must, dear son, you must travel and be a nomad on the world and move to Italy, son. And it may or may not work. But like what you're saying, what you do and not what you say. Maybe because my wife and I, we travel like crazy and, well, we drag the kids everywhere and like, with a Morocco story, then they eventually might love it. But I really like what you're saying about. Because I'm thinking of the whole goal of this whole now what? Program is how can we be of any assistance, be a guide to you who would like to achieve your next. Now what? Your next phase of your life. Or as my tagline says, who will you be next? Who is the version of you that you choose to be, ideally choose to be next? And I like this whole idea of this indirect sort of influence in a way that's pretty cool.
• 32:32
  Speaker A: Well, I mean, I think we talked about earlier, even with you, it's an indirect influence of you becoming a superhero. Right. I mean, you were already a hero.
• 32:39
  Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah.
• 32:40
  Speaker A: And without you actually having a confrontational conversation with your future wife.
• 32:46
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 32:46
  Speaker A: About why the hell are you doing this? And we don't do this. And then all of a sudden, she led the way, you followed, and then look at you now because of that.
• 32:57
  Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah.
• 32:58
  Speaker C: Well, it's another good example of she did it. She didn't tell me about it. She didn't tell me how I could do it. She just did it. And I said, oh, wow, you just did the thing.
• 33:07
  Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah.
• 33:08
  Speaker C: And now I thought, well, I guess I could do the thing too, 100%.
• 33:12
  Speaker A: And kind of going into that, like I said earlier, I think she realized that you were scared. And she realized if she did it, then your fear would go away. And again, you can go home and have a conversation with an axer, but I'll put money on it. Like, that's the scenario of, oh, yeah, I kind of did it that way. To your point, like, she's not the person in the limelight, but you are now. It was kind of like a seed of tranquility for you to become who you are.
• 33:42
  Speaker C: Wow. You know, this is why I like having these now what? Conversations. Because I. I know we all think we have an idea or we've got a. This is the way it is. Or I think until talking with you today, I think I was thinking of it more of a direct and face to face confrontation. Not confrontational, so negative. But the. Okay, here's how to do this. Now what? Here's how to do your next phase. Here's the plan. But I like your indirect in the background sort of hearing it and that.
• 34:16
  Speaker A: But you're already doing it. I mean, your methodology of your workshop. Writing the worst book ever.
• 34:22
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 34:23
  Speaker A: That's like indirect way to overcome fear.
• 34:25
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 34:26
  Speaker A: It's like. Right. The bottom of the barrel, the thing that's in the toilet that just would not flush away. That's just floating right there.
• 34:33
  Speaker C: That was a little too visual.
• 34:35
  Speaker A: Exactly. But that's, that's. You have to face it. Right. You have to confront it to move past it. And that's what your workshop does. Anyone that wants to become a writer, that's not a writer and they are scared of writing. Kind of like I was talking about before, being outrageous. The outrageous night.
• 34:50
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 34:50
  Speaker A: You have to face it to be able to be like, wow, if I can do that, then I could do anything.
• 34:55
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 34:56
  Speaker A: Same thing.
• 34:57
  Speaker C: And seeing all the other people on stage going completely bonkers and outrageous.
• 35:00
  Speaker A: Completely bonkers. Or in your case, writing the worst damn book they could ever possibly think about. And then that book becomes part of their storyline. Like once they become a New York Times top seller or whatever happens down the road, whoever they're becoming, they'll be able to hold up that nasty, disgusting non masterpiece of piece of work and be like, it started here.
• 35:19
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 35:20
  Speaker A: To become this.
• 35:22
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 35:23
  Speaker C: Because if they. And this was my challenge. I tried to start with this masterpiece, which I can. I can tell you does not work well. It might work for some, but. But it didn't work for me. So I wanted it to be perfection and awesomeness. And I was just stalling because I was scared that it wouldn't be perfect enough. And that's why after all these years, I have this worst book ever program again. I like the way you phrase it. It's nice to just get over that fear.
• 35:51
  Speaker A: Well, I mean, you've done a great job. I mean, most people write one book, right? Everyone has one book in them.
• 35:55
  Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah.
• 35:57
  Speaker A: What Number are you on?
• 35:58
  Speaker C: 30, 39.
• 35:59
  Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, it gets to the point, like two books. Yeah. Cool. Three books.
• 36:02
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 36:02
  Speaker A: But when you get to double digits times three, it's like you really have to sit and be like. Like, not only are you beyond fear, like you went prolific, but now you're at such a level of synergy within yourself that you could write another book tomorrow if you wanted to.
• 36:19
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 36:20
  Speaker A: Without thinking twice about it, without hesitation, without fear. It becomes part of who you are.
• 36:25
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 36:26
  Speaker C: And I think that's an excellent reasoning to become the guide. The guide to help the others who haven't written their book number one. And hey, by the way, you know what? I know you want to do your masterpiece. Let's do that. Second, we're going to do a fun little exercise first. We're going to write your worst book first. What? What sounds a waste of time. I would get all this pushback. That's a total. Why? Why would I spend all this time and money and effort on this thing? I'm going to throw in the garbage.
• 36:50
  Speaker A: Well, every first book is garbage. Even if you think it's not, it is completely garbage.
• 36:58
  Speaker C: Let's consciously make it garbage and then we'll just.
• 37:01
  Speaker A: I mean, I think about my first book and it was like, I'm almost embarrassed. Like I had to take it off the shelves. It was so embarrassing. Right. But again, at the time it's like, ah, yeah, it's great. No, the hell it's not. You have to go through a rite of passage. You have to wade through the water. I mean, literally, if you want to go back to. You have to wade through the water. You have to really dig deep and get through all of that to get to a book that's like, wow.
• 37:26
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 37:27
  Speaker A: And it may take 10 books, it may take three books, it may take 60 books.
• 37:31
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 37:32
  Speaker A: But you'll know when you're holding like your, your masterpiece in your hand. And I mean, I'm not in my masterpiece yet. Like, I still have time.
• 37:39
  Speaker C: Yeah, me either.
• 37:40
  Speaker A: To figure out and to put like, I didn't learn storytelling until seven years ago and that was more. So I had to go through a rite of death passage. I had to face death in a face to figure out how do I Literally. Literally.
• 37:56
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 37:57
  Speaker A: But if that never happened, would I be as a good storyteller as I am today if that didn't happen?
• 38:02
  Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah.
• 38:04
  Speaker A: Cause and effect.
• 38:05
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 38:08
  Speaker C: Okay, so I'd like to wrap this up with some advice for an eight year old listening in the background. Or if you're not 8. Maybe you're. Maybe you're 18, maybe you're 28, maybe 38, 48, 58, 68. It doesn't matter. In fact, it might not even end in eight. But if you're listening in the background here and you're inspired by what we're talking about here for you essay.
• 38:33
  Speaker B: What.
• 38:33
  Speaker C: Advice might you have for someone there listening to background who's sort of quietly, or maybe not so quietly, thinking, you know, I'm ready for that next change in my life. I'm ready for the next chapter in my life. How do I. How do I. Because it's often. How do I get out of the rut of where I currently am?
• 38:49
  Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. I think it's part of that. And it's also kind of getting into vibrations. You know, I'm not going to get into, like, anything that may seem mythological here, but you and I, we vibrate on the same vibration. Right. Like, we communicate. We have completely different backgrounds, completely different upbringing, but once we met each other, we was like, oh, yeah, yeah. Like the mag. The magnetism was there.
• 39:14
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 39:16
  Speaker A: Find those people. It may not be in your house, it may not be your parents, but find those people. And hopefully those people are leading magnetism into positive. Because there's negative magnetism as well. Right. But find those people that you are in the same wavelength that challenge you, that push you, someone that you can look up to, and they can look up to you, and you can kind of have this push and pull. The faster you find those people in your inner circle, the bigger you could explode in the long run.
• 39:43
  Speaker B: Wow.
• 39:43
  Speaker A: And I would say do that now, whether if you're five years old and you're like, I don't know the hell he's talking about.
• 39:48
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 39:48
  Speaker A: But if you're with little Johnny in school and you and little Johnny are the oddballs.
• 39:52
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 39:53
  Speaker A: And you and little Johnny feed off each other and you're getting some kind of results, whether it's drawing, whether it's writing, whether it's football, baseball, whatever that synergy of that vibration is. Hold on to that person.
• 40:05
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 40:06
  Speaker A: And feed off of that and also deliver value back to that person as much as you can as well. Wow.
• 40:13
  Speaker C: I say it's been a pleasure.
• 40:16
  Speaker A: Pleasure was mine and.
• 40:19
  Speaker C: And fantastic. And I learned. Every conversation we have, I learned something. So I'm thrilled to have met you. I'm glad you're here in the Netherlands, and I'm looking forward to what's next for both of us, too.
• 40:29
  Speaker A: 100. I appreciate you being here. And I appreciate you not only being here, but accepting me into your circle, considering that we didn't know each other.
• 40:38
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 40:38
  Speaker A: But it was just kind of like that hidden vibration that.
• 40:41
  Speaker C: I like it. I like what you're saying.
• 40:43
  Speaker A: It just worked.
• 40:43
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 40:44
  Speaker C: I like your advice there for the 8 year old or the 18 or 28 or 38, 48, 58, 68, 78.
• 40:50
  Speaker A: Yeah. I mean sometimes you got against the grain. I mean it's, it's. Your parents may not understand.
• 40:56
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 40:56
  Speaker A: Your best friend may not understand.
• 40:58
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 40:59
  Speaker A: But there's someone out there, out of these 8 billion people.
• 41:01
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 41:02
  Speaker A: Numbers being in your favor. There's somebody that understands you.
• 41:05
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 41:05
  Speaker A: And they may be a little bit ahead of you a little bit on that. That race to where they're a couple steps ahead of you. You're just like, yeah, I need to be around that person more often.
• 41:14
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 41:15
  Speaker C: I love it. Thanks for being here.
• 41:18
  Speaker A: Thanks, girls.
• 41:19
  Speaker B: Mike.