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How to Adjust & Not Quit with Amber Bibelheimer · In 9 Minutes

• 0:04
  Speaker 1: If you had a dollar for every time you heard yourself or someone else say I don't have time for that, you'd probably be rich.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: I know life can feel like a circus, especially when you're trying to juggle it all, and I know what it's like to be pulled in a million different directions and to feel like there's never enough time to do all the things for all the people.
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: But I really believe that what you want is possible.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: It just requires some decision making and intentional action.
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: You truly can't make time or find time.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: You have to set it apart, and I'll show you how to make big moves and take game changing action nine minutes at a time.
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: I'm Jennifer Seiss.
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: I love helping impact-oriented women run their home life and business, gain traction in their day to day and have more time with the people they love the most.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: My heart is to share what I've learned along the way and help you get more of what you want out of your life and work.
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: Every episode is designed to get you on your way to a quick win.
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: So grab your favorite beverage, pull up a chair and let's start making more of your time.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: I am so fired up to have Amber Bebalheimer with me today and, in addition to being a productivity, business and mindset growth coach who helps working women and mom CEOs go from overwhelmed and overworked to thriving in business and motherhood.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: She is the creator of the Momentum Restart framework, which is a transformative 90-day program that elevates productivity, joy and profits.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: Who doesn't want that?
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: But she is also the co-founder and co-host of the Restart Collective.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: In-person experiences with me and we are going to have such a good time today and I'm so excited for you to get to really hear some insight from her on one of my favorite subjects that she covers within the Momentum Restart Amber.
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: I am so fired up that you're here.
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: It's so fun to have you on the show and I've loved being on the Momentum Restart podcast and I cannot wait for my listeners to connect with you today.
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: Thank you so much for having me, Jennifer.
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: It's always a blast to connect and collab.
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: We are going to have so much fun and I am so fired up for people to get to hear from you in a different perspective.
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: So when you and I connected through the Momentum Restart several years ago, there was a mindset shift that you shared that resonated with me.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: I remember even getting a notepad with this on it and I kept thinking I wish I would have had this mindset shift to offer my kids when they were little.
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: And it is the extraordinary, amazing adjust, don't quit.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: Mindset.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: And I would love to hear a little bit about how that mindset became a part of the Momentum Restart framework.
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: Yes, and I love.
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: I still use it.
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: I say it all the time to my kids, to my clients, to myself, every day.
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: And when we adjust, don't quit.
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: I remember when Momentum Restart first became a thing and when I was coaching in the very early years I had my boys were really little and Jack was two, max was four they were home full time with me while I'm growing my business, and I remember this phenomena.
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: It's like when a mom decides I'm going to wake up earlier and start working out, or I'm going to wake up earlier and have some devotions, I'm going to wake up earlier and do it XYZ, and as soon as you set the alarm for an hour earlier to try to set aside time for yourself, the kids instinctively know that you're doing this and they all wake up at the same time.
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: It's this wild phenomenon I hear from every mom out there, and so I remember this happening, and I remember hearing this from other moms too and thinking why are we surprised that this is happening?
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: Why are we letting this overtake our whole plan and how can we expect it and make some adjustments to make it happen?
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: So that's how it originally came together.
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: I mean you see me chuckling and I'm sorry, but it's so true.
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: There's nothing more true that as soon as you do that like oh, and the kids are sick and they are all waking up earlier and everything they decide to change everything that day.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: And I think it's so true.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: It kind of proves that statement that with intention comes disruption.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: Like that is exactly right.
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: You set this intention to take this action and as moms, you're kind of renewing your intentions.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: I think moms renew their intention, or have to renew their intentions, more frequently than the average person because they have more pouring in and contributing to that More things out of their control for sure.
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: A million, a million percent, and their responsibility level is just significantly different and heavier.
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: I would say yes, and all the time.
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: So it's no matter what type of I noticed with mom friends, especially when they're juggling, working and the kids at home or bringing the kids to and from school.
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: There's so many things on their mind all the time and there's so much responsibility, like you said, and that can put a little bit of expectation or a little bit of extra stress too, on the best of plans.
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: And so it's so.
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: You and I love having a plan and making sure that things are strategic and planned out and intentional, but this has to be a part of the plan knowing how to adjust and not quit, because there are going to be things out of our control.
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: A million percent, and you know like I love that phrase so much, and I mean my kids are 22 and 24, but I wish when they were little I would have had even just that phrase to put around it for them and for myself too, because, like you said, we can have the best laid plans but then things are going to blow up, and there's no doubt about that, I think too, like when you go through the momentum restart framework.
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: What's so good is that there are so many pillars that you're teaching women and moms, and this adjust, don't quit piece can be woven in through each section of it, giving them the mindset shift that everything doesn't.
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: You know it's not.
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: It's more than progress over perfection, really.
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: It's really having an attitude that helps you know that you can succeed because you can make adjustments.
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: And I love the question that you always ask what's your plan B?
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, and knowing what our plan B is going to be is helpful for expecting that these things out of our control are going to happen.
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: It reminds me of when I was a kid, the only video game I was allowed to play I don't remember the name of it, but it was a girl rollerblading down the boardwalk and you had to watch out for a banana peel or a crack in the sidewalk and help her jump over it.
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: So that was the only video game my sister and I played when we were little and it stuck in my brain when I was imagining that game one day and how you anticipated the cracks in the sidewalk.
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: You anticipated the banana peel and you didn't not move forward or go rollerblading on the boardwalk because there was going to be these obstacles.
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: You expected them and that was part of the art, part of the dance, part of the living in that video game.
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: And same I tell myself and my kids some days we don't stop walking outside just because there's cracks in the sidewalk.
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: We know that they're there, we're looking for them and we learn how to adjust around them too.
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, for sure.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: I love that so much because when there are obstacles, if we can strategize for that in advance, then it makes it so much easier to continue to move towards what you really want, and that's so, so important, and I love that you teach your kids that, but also give moms and women the tools to use it for themselves.
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: But then also, when we can learn and apply tools for ourselves, it's so good to be able to multiply what we're learning and really apply it in every area of our life, and that's something that's so important and valuable.
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: When you are so busy and have so much going on and have so many things to be responsible for and also you want to enjoy life, and if you constantly feel like you're hitting your head against a wall and you're never getting where you want to go because you haven't learned the strategy of adjusting, not quitting, it's frustrating and it keeps you from trying new things and getting really excited about some things that could have a big impact on your life.
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: Yes, that's so true.
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, there's so many big things that you want and you want to do and when you're able to adjust and not quit, and that really there's three parts of that that you want to use.
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: That you can use quickly each day to is expect it, like we talked about, you're anticipating that there's going to be something out of your control.
• 9:10
  Speaker 2: That's going to happen, and then, when it does happen, you're going to evaluate it.
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: You're going to really look at it and think through okay, what happened?
• 9:18
  Speaker 2: Is this something that's just circumstantial, that I just have no control over and I have to adjust my attitude or my schedule or my expectations on myself?
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: Or is this something that I kind of keep doing to myself and I keep making excuses for, and you evaluate and really determine what that particular issue is, why you keep hitting the wall, and then, once you've evaluated it, then you can make an adjustment and you know how to adjust.
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: And adjusting and not quitting is not just working harder, just pushing harder.
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: It is not that.
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: It is evaluating, being honest, taking off the pressure that you have to do everything and making those adjustments so that it feels better in your body, in your life.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: A million percent so important and that evaluation piece is so, so important.
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: One of the things I like to talk to people about is doing a nine minute reset at the end of the day, and that is part of exploring those things and adjusting and not quitting so that you can do better the next day, feel better about it and feel more energized about what you have to do, but also not let your circumstances dictate how you live and dictate your attitude.
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: It's so important.
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: Can you share how people listening can put this adjust, don't quit strategy into practice in nine minutes or less?
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: Absolutely yes.
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: So the first step is noticing when it happens.
• 10:42
  Speaker 2: If you start seeing that you're frustrated that I was going to do XYZ but now XYZ happened, is noticing that right away and pausing If you can in the moment, taking deep breath, excusing yourself outside or whatever you need to do.
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: Or I love your idea of setting the time at night for nine minutes, shelf it for the evening so you can really process it and think through.
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: So it's noticing it first and then, when you are evaluating, really giving yourself an opportunity to really discover the root issue of what keeps popping up, really facing whether it's maybe it's a fear holding you back and so you procrastinate, or a busy, productive procrastination.
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: We've all done this where we hold all the laundry and clean the house but we didn't do all the things we were supposed to do that day, that we were going to move us forward in our business, or something big Really make.
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: Looking at what is the mindset shift that has to be made.
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: Sometimes it's something we need to shift in our brain and sometimes it's having that plan B Thinking okay, well, my kids are sick now and I was planning to record, for this happened to me the other week, planning to record for podcasts and everybody was at home everybody as much as I would tell them to be quiet or read a book, they decided it was time to have pillow fights.
• 12:10
  Speaker 2: We had to adjust and just lower my expectations of what the podcast episodes were going to be that week, and that's okay.
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: I still was able to move forward.
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: I didn't quit, but I made some adjustments and was able to lift up my expectations.
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: It's really expecting it, taking the time to process it and be honest about what type of adjustment has to be made.
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: Is it your mindset?
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: Is your schedule?
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: Is your expectations?
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: Then put that into place, put that into action and adjust and also know that it takes practice.
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: This is something.
• 12:44
  Speaker 2: It's an art of restarting.
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: That's what I always say in the momentum restart is it's an art.
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: It's not.
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: You learn a skill and you're able to do it every single day by checking off boxes.
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: It's an art to really understand what's in your brain, what's happening around you, what you really want.
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: It takes time, but the more you do it and use that muscle, it's going to give you so much peace and also experience so much momentum, no matter what life throws at you.
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: For sure.
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: I love that and I love those steps of noticing it, evaluating it, really understanding that it's coming.
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: They're coming.
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: Disruptions are going to come.
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: If you are an intentional person at all, you can just expect them.
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: I love that you said that it takes practice, because anything that is good in your life is something that came from practice.
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: Yes, Anything good having hard conversations with your kids, demonstrating your husband's love language, being a friend, whatever it is those things take practice and you have to be willing to finesse those things and adjust and not quit if it's really important and it's really something that's super valuable for you.
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: I love that so much and I love that it can be done in nine minutes a day, because we all know nine minutes is the best amount of time to take some serious action.
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: I love that this mindset and this attitude and almost a posture of your heart can be applied to every area of your life.
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: It's not just to your business, it's not just to your relationships, but it's to learning, to growth, to trying new things, to really pursuing more adventure or whatever it is.
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: If you can adopt this mindset, if you can really take it on and go through the steps that you shared, then it's going to be transformative and have such a big impact on every area of your life, because when you experience that piece that you talked about, that is a game changer for sure.
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: It really is, and it's going to make you want to keep moving forward 100%.
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: I love this.
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for just unpacking that for everyone, and I would love for you to share where people can find you and what something you're really excited to be working on right now.
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: Oh, I'm so glad you asked.
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: I am really loving the new momentum restart planner and journal and you can take a peek at it.
• 15:20
  Speaker 2: Get to know it.
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: You're going to see a lot of these mindset tips I just don't quit and a lot of other momentum restart methods inside the journal, just sprinkled out throughout your week.
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: It's like having me next to you while you're planning your week, just encouraging you which is really awesome, by the way, because I get to do that.
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: Well, same to you.
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: You can look at my website coachamberbcom.
• 15:46
  Speaker 2: Backslashjournal to check that out.
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: I am on Instagram also at coachamberby, and you can find all the good stuff there and reach out.
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: Let me know what stood out to you or what you're adjusting.
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: I would love to hear.
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: And then come see Jennifer and I at a retreat.
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: Yes, do it.
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: So, again, you can find her at coachamberbycom backslashjournal If you want to check out that planner and journal that's amazing and that it was so diligently put together.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: You can find her on Instagram at coachamberby, and you can find all of her information in the show notes.
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: And here's to more adjusting and not quitting.
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: Nine minutes at a time.
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: Thanks so much for being here, amber, and I can't wait to see you soon.
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: Bye, thanks.
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: Thanks so much for listening today.
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: Do you have questions you'd love to ask, but don't, because you aren't sure who to ask, or you'd rather not let the world in on not having it all together?
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: I get it.
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: I get lots of questions all the time, from parenting to business development, to Bible study, recommendations to the best meal to serve a crowd and even how to navigate hard conversations.
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: My husband and kids call me Google and since I'm a problem solver by nature and love research, it sort of fits.
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: So I am so excited to answer your questions.
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: You can share your questions with me by DMing me on Instagram at Jennifer Seiss and I'll answer your questions on an upcoming episode.
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: So here's to more intentional connection and less grind.
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: Nine minutes at a time.