Latest / Voices for Voices® / The Gap Between What Companies Promise and What They Do | Episode 480

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The Gap Between What Companies Promise and What They Do | Episode 480 · Voices for Voices®

• 0:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Hi everyone, it's Justin with Voices for Voices.
• 0:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We're so grateful to have you with us, whether you're watching, whether you're listening, whether you're here in the United States or some other country, territory, province outside of the United States.
• 0:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We welcome one and all to episode number 480 of our uh Voices for Voices TV show and podcast portfolio.
• 0:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So we have a lot of shows, and I invite you, we invite you uh to check some of those other shows out.
• 0:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I promise you they will be interesting.
• 0:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh they will be um some will make you laugh, some might might make you cry.
• 0:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh we cover everything, cover easy topics, hard topics.
• 0:57
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If you can give us a big thumbs up, like, follow, subscribe, share, reach out to 2550, 75, your contacts and your phone.
• 1:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Let them know about the voices for voices, TV show and podcast, build on the foundation and the pillars of mental health, trauma, recovery, uh, and just people living everyday life.
• 1:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And that's uh that's what that's what we talk about.
• 1:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And we know life isn't always easy, so we do talk about the hard topics that uh that do arise from time to time.
• 1:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So thank you very much for for joining us.
• 1:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And yes, that is a dog on my shoulders.
• 1:45
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um, this is our family pet.
• 1:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If you've been with us for the past few episodes, uh you'll you know our our family uh dog, Lucy.
• 1:58
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh we've never had a never had uh again, never had a uh an inside dog before, or an outside dog for that matter.
• 2:07
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Growing up we did for uh a brief period that I remember, uh, but most of it I I don't because I was so young.
• 2:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh but I've I I didn't know that um that the dogs like to rest on necks and shoulders.
• 2:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I think because she's she's so short, she just wants to, you know, it's that whole, you know, the uh if you have the higher the person with the the higher position is able to see more than the person with the lower position.
• 2:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So that's just a general comment uh that that uh is the case.
• 2:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And uh so I just wanted to share that at the outset because you might see her moving around, you might see her uh like you see a Paul right here.
• 3:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh so it it's cool, she's fun.
• 3:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um it's uh it it's it's it's a neat experience to to have um for our family.
• 3:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's it's it's it's great.
• 3:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Expectations, expectations I kind of throw in the bucket a little bit with judging.
• 3:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We've talked about judging so many times, not from like a court perspective, but just oh, did you see that person?
• 3:44
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Did you see what they're wearing?
• 3:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Do you see those shoes?
• 3:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Do you see that that outfit?
• 3:50
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Do you see that car they're driving?
• 3:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh yeah, that's the judging part.
• 3:57
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You know, the expectations.
• 3:59
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: A lot of times the outside world doesn't really know what the expectations of an individual are, right?
• 4:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We we can look at the obvious of a a sporting event, you know, we want to win as many games, matches, uh as possible.
• 4:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So expectations, not to lose any any any games, matches.
• 4:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um that's kind of pretty pretty cut and dry, straightforward.
• 4:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But when we talk about topics that affect more than just a small percentage of the world population that plays professional sports, even the growing up, you know, the as a you know, playing t-ball, playing playing a game, uh, you know, we want to win.
• 5:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's that's kind of the the the thought process there in a in a very high-level sense of the meaning.
• 5:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um and so we look at that and say, oh, okay, well, that makes sense.
• 5:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, what about in regular everyday life when we're just living, we're we're just waking up, getting ready for school, getting ready for work, looking for work.
• 5:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so the expectation there is to find something, to find a job, to find something that makes us happy not only on the outside, on the periphery of okay, this title, this amount of money is the salary, this many vacation days.
• 6:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But looking on the inside, looking on the mental health side of is this gonna be a healthy experience for me?
• 6:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I know we have to, you know, a lot of people say, well, Justin, you you just have to negotiate.
• 6:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You just have to negotiate.
• 6:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Yes, we do have to excuse me, we do have to negotiate.
• 6:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But as a person that's spent 15 plus years in in the in kind of the the corporate world, uh I can't I can't help but think that some of the stress of not only deadlines because of saying, okay, well I have two weeks or three weeks or a couple days to work on this project, right?
• 7:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's usually never like that, at least in my experience.
• 7:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Maybe your job's different, and and that's what makes us all unique.
• 7:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But the jobs I've had, and this is why I think I know that voices for voices is for me because the work that I have done over the years, sometimes there's a deadline of you have a couple days to work on it, and maybe it's the for first time.
• 7:44
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like, let's just say there's a part of a company that's growing, and so you're hired into that company into the area that's growing, and so they want you to help grow that part of the company that's new, and so growth is obviously an expectation, but like on a day-to-day basis, and maybe this is just me and my mind.
• 8:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I like to know what I need to do, I need a little structure.
• 8:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Actually, I need a lot of structure.
• 8:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If I'm gonna be brought in to work on said project or department, I need to know not just what the end goal is, because a lot of times that's easy.
• 8:45
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Grow sales.
• 8:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We want more money, we want more profit for the company.
• 8:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But the day-to-day of okay, so what does that look like?
• 9:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I'm not trying to be a I don't know, a negative person.
• 9:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I'm not sorry to say this.
• 9:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I have been over the years, but I'm not anymore.
• 9:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: When a person is hired into a job, they need direction.
• 9:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I don't give a shit if it's a low-level internship or the president and CEO.
• 9:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There needs to be some fucking training, some real training, not the oh, we'll work on this the next you know month or there needs to be some real training at the beginning because otherwise, we can get lost in the monotony and go, alright, so I have this thing I have to do in two weeks and a month.
• 10:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Nobody's shown me nine times out of ten for me.
• 10:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: My computer never had the programs that it needed to do the job that I was hired in to do.
• 10:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: In fact, I had one job where my computer was in another country for over a week.
• 10:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They knew I was hired, they knew my start date, there was plenty of time, and I sat for a week and a half at least, it might have even been two weeks, but it was a good solid amount of time that I didn't have a computer, I was living in a city, I was brought in to do specific work, and I didn't have a computer day one, day two, day three, right?
• 11:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I'm brought in and nothing's ready, nothing's set up.
• 11:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: The computer's not ready.
• 11:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I I'm sitting there, like, all right, like what do I do?
• 11:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Right?
• 11:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Try to look busy is you know, often, well, look like you're you're working, you know, look busy.
• 11:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, if the work that needs to be done is on the computer, then I need the computer.
• 11:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Then when the computer came, it didn't come with the programs, the software, the hardware.
• 11:41
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It didn't come ready, right?
• 11:44
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You would think if you had a month that you knew since I was moving a good portion away, uh a lot of miles, that the company would have that already set up.
• 12:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I mean, I had a place to sit, but what am I gonna do for eight, nine hours a day?
• 12:06
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I don't have a computer.
• 12:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I get brought into meetings, and I'm expected to know answers just right off the top of my head.
• 12:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I need a computer for that.
• 12:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I need a computer to help aid me.
• 12:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I didn't have it.
• 12:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So that's when I said earlier, you know, there needs to be training.
• 12:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There's no there was no training then either.
• 12:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like, what format do you want to see the final product?
• 12:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Do you want it in Microsoft Excel?
• 12:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Do you want it in PowerPoint?
• 12:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Do you want it in Tableau?
• 12:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You know, SAP, whatever the whatever the program.
• 12:50
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: No idea.
• 12:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so I use my best judgment, and then it's like, well, that's not what you know what we we do here.
• 13:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You know, we we show it in PowerPoint or whatever.
• 13:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And that could have been part of onboarding that they call it, you know, a new employee being brought in.
• 13:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Training, none.
• 13:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And if there was training, it's the kind of training where it's like, okay, here's what the company does.
• 13:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, that's great.
• 13:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm I'm I'm gonna need to know what the company does, what products it sells, who it sells to, businesses or uh consumers like you and I.
• 13:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I know this is gonna rub people, some people the wrong way, but this is just life.
• 13:50
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: This is this is my experience, and I'm hoping you had a different you've you've had different experiences, and a lot of people have, and bravo for that.
• 14:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm I'm happy.
• 14:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But some of the stress and some of the anxiety that I have built up and had built up over the years undoubtedly came from work.
• 14:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I needed structure.
• 14:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I didn't have structure, forget about it.
• 14:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And you might say, well, Justin, you know, that a company can't just spend all the time just you know babying you around is a term I've heard.
• 14:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You know, like they're gonna spoon feed you.
• 14:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: No, we're not gonna spoon feed you.
• 14:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, when I talk about that in the interview process of what I need to be, you know, what like what would you call success for you?
• 15:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: How how and what would do you need for you know your success and to help our company?
• 15:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And when I share that information and it's not adhered to, and you still hire me, I think that it's because of all the things in the interview and interviews, because multiple usually there's multiple interviews.
• 15:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And to hire somebody and to not do that is is not right.
• 15:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So then you know I I have extra stress because I'm like, all right, I'm already uh you know, going back to the no computer for at least a week, week and a half.
• 15:54
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Once I get the computer, I'm running like a I'm already, you know, a week and a half at least behind on where I should be.
• 16:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I'm trying to play a game of ketchup.
• 16:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Not like ketchup they put on food, french fries or other other food.
• 16:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like catching up, like I'm behind.
• 16:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm running a race, and I'm a mile behind the person in front of me.
• 16:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And that person in front of me is another person that was hired, and they have a computer, and they're able to start working, and they're getting accolades, and I'm sitting there, and to other people that don't know, they just see me, they're like, Well, why is he just sitting there?
• 16:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Where's his computer at?
• 16:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Oh, sure, it's in a different, sure it's in Argentina, because that was where company's based out of.
• 17:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So that that was where you had computers and such.
• 17:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Where it's coming from.
• 17:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so it was like I would come in, and it would be almost like I'd be looking on my phone looking at like a delivery date, right?
• 17:20
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You send a you send a package, or somebody sends you a package, and they say, okay, here's the tracking numbers or letters, or both.
• 17:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so shame on you, business owner, managers, directors, anybody who HR, human resources, uh it's on you.
• 17:54
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And then to sit there.
• 17:59
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'll give you an example.
• 18:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'll give you an example of how something can be can be added stress.
• 18:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Okay.
• 18:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So right, if marriage is right for you and having children, this is this is where the experience that I'm gonna be sharing.
• 18:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Okay.
• 18:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So there's policies, right?
• 18:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Of here's the expected dress, you know, business casual, business professional.
• 18:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so there's all these, you know, uh this they call it the employee handbook, and things change from time to time.
• 18:50
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And one of the things that changed, and it wouldn't have affected me if I wasn't my wife, if we weren't expecting our child, our first child, or a child in general, or if we were adopting.
• 19:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So right around the time that our child was born.
• 19:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There was a modification in the employee handbook.
• 19:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And it was about how how men could have a a certain amount of I believe it was a certain amount of leave.
• 19:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so usually it's sometimes it's paid, sometimes it's not, sometimes it's partial.
• 19:57
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, I wasn't, you know, because the policy happened after Red Earth How shortly after, I wasn't able to use that policy.
• 20:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Give you another one.
• 20:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Companies talking about mental health, right?
• 20:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Oh yeah, we're we we believe in you know the mental health of our employees, same company.
• 20:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I've been going to counseling therapy, uh uh the whole shebang for years, okay.
• 20:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So the company's like, yep, we support employees.
• 20:45
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I shared the with HR because there was another policy that said that they would that the company would pay for three visits to if you need therapy after some traumatic event, or if you just fe if you feel that that's what you need, right?
• 21:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So if you're a company, if I as I own voices for voices, if I say, Oh, well, we're gonna cover, and this is hypothetical because we we don't really have employees you're really looking at the employee.
• 21:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh we have obviously David and Amanda and and and family uh with uh mythical creatures around the world, uh, but we don't have you know uh employees that you'll clock in at a certain time and clock out at a certain time.
• 21:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And and so this is hypothetical in my as we talk about this.
• 21:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So let's say I bring in a new employee.
• 22:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Everybody's got stuff going on in their lives, right?
• 22:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That whole saying, you know, everybody, you don't know what's going on in somebody's life, basically.
• 22:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And we don't.
• 22:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so let's say that I don't have a policy that talks about, you know, just like insurance is basically what it is.
• 22:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And and part of that insurance is this specific thing.
• 22:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so this specific thing, let's say I add to my employee handbook for the organization.
• 22:45
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And say we'll give you three free visits to a counselor.
• 22:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Right?
• 22:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We're like I mentioned at the beginning, we're our foundation, our pillars at the core is mental health.
• 23:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so it would be not a good move for an organization that at the core is mental health, that there's no policy, no um no way for individuals, if they need to see and talk to somebody.
• 23:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And not that we need to know all all the things that are in that conversation.
• 23:44
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We don't.
• 23:45
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We should just offer it, and whether the person's been going to therapy for seven years or has never seen a therapist in their life.
• 23:58
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We should honor that policy.
• 24:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so and this is where things kind of went started to go downhill.
• 24:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I believe wholeheartedly the the cost because I had I I I was I had the regular you know company insurance.
• 24:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I was using and I was going for visits to my therapist.
• 24:44
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so I went to human resources, right?
• 24:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They're dealing with humans and the resources, insurance, benefits, if there's retirement, all those things, vacation days, you know, if there's issues with people on your team, they help you work through it.
• 25:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so they do a whole host of things, and they for the most part do a great job.
• 25:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But I'm giving you my experience of what I would have expected from if I and the hypothetical that I gave, that if I had if I had changed the policy and somebody's reaches out, it shouldn't matter if they've been going again, it shouldn't matter if they've been going to therapy for 20 years or never been to a therapist, but they they feel like it might be helpful to go.
• 25:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And it would be covered at 100% for those three visits.
• 25:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Right?
• 25:50
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Therapy, all this, all this stuff, medications if you need that, it's not free.
• 25:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You have to pay, even with insurance.
• 26:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So at said company, I went and talked at Human Resources because I saw the change in policy and about the three visits about the company will cover 100% for three visits.
• 26:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, there was an employee that was that started their three visits.
• 26:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I don't I don't know what again.
• 26:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I was just a I was a colleague on a professional level with with this employee, so I didn't have any idea why they were going or anything like that.
• 26:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I just I just heard that they were utilizing that new part of the policy.
• 26:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I went to human resources on my own, right?
• 27:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They tell you, you know, if you see something, see something, say something, you know, we're the people that will help you through uh navigate through situations.
• 27:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so when I went up and I I talked with human resources and and and asked them and said, look, I I saw this change in policy.
• 27:20
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Thank you for doing this.
• 27:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um I've been I've been going to therapy for quite a while.
• 27:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Am I able to use those three visits with my current therapist covered at a hundred percent?
• 27:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You know what I got told?
• 27:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: No.
• 27:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: No, this is this is for you know brand new.
• 27:54
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um, you know, people that you know, well, so and so and so and so.
• 28:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They didn't give name, they just said, you know, oh, people, yeah, everybody's going through stuff, and you know, they're like, oh, well, that's great that you're you're going to therapy and you're doing that.
• 28:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But you know, sorry, like, no, that's not covered.
• 28:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You know, you've been seeing a therapist, so no, those three visits three visits, that that doesn't that doesn't work.
• 28:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Now, if you want to start over with a new therapist, who you don't, you know, that's again, and then and then it's it's it's just very, very tiny network where they got like, you know, one or two.
• 28:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And as anybody's been to therapy or a doctor or anything, we're all unique, right?
• 28:58
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Some people we get along with more than others.
• 29:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I know from experience, I think we all know, and it doesn't have to be on the therapy level, just any level.
• 29:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We're all human beings, we're all unique.
• 29:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so the fact that I basically got turned down, you'd have thought that the company would say, Oh yeah.
• 29:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We'll cover that.
• 29:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So as soon as I said that, my work experience, not just the years, I'm talking the experience that I started feeling at work started to change.
• 29:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Now my manager and boss, boss's boss, I'm getting treated like differently because when you're part of finance and marketing, if you have anything to do with numbers, you've sat in a meeting at least once with a bunch of numbers on a spreadsheet, and five, six, seven, ten people or maybe more are in that room and they're looking at the budget, they're looking at the budget.
• 30:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You know, capitalism's great, right?
• 30:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, they're looking at the budget and they're seeing what is high, what is low, how to adjust.
• 30:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so when they see numbers that are high, the people in leadership go, well, why are those so high?
• 31:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I don't know.
• 31:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Let's take a look.
• 31:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Let's double-click into that cell.
• 31:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Oh, it's in this department.
• 31:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so this was in the benefits.
• 31:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: This was the benefits, right?
• 31:20
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They're getting ready to negotiate, whatever, for the next year, and and then they're looking at, you know, what what what would have been the what would have been the what are the numbers for this year?
• 31:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so that's what happened.
• 31:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I was in I was in the meetings.
• 31:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So people say, oh yeah, you're full of the I was in the meetings and I saw it with my own eyes, heard it with my own ears.
• 31:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so I kept getting drilled down and down and down and down to say, oh, it's this department that uh, you know, has higher than expected medical bills or medical coverage.
• 32:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And it was shortly after that that I was let go by that organization.
• 32:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: People can say what they want, everybody's got an opinion, I know that everybody's got an opinion.
• 32:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: People close to me, people not close to me.
• 32:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It is what it is, right?
• 32:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That whole term.
• 32:41
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It is what it is.
• 32:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, I don't think it was that.
• 32:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I it couldn't have been because that would have been unethical, right?
• 32:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You're basically letting somebody go because they're medical, you know, they're utilizing the medical benefits.
• 33:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: The very benefits you're now saying you're gonna cover three visits, but yet it's only with these conditions.
• 33:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's that's not caring about mental health.
• 33:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's throwing an add-on, a supplement for very specific cases.
• 33:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And it whether you know it or not, the how do I say this the right way?
• 33:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: The amount of people that are gonna step forward when they see that change in policy are gonna be very low.
• 33:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Because, right, it's mental, it's in our head, right?
• 33:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That person's mental, they're me mentally unstable.
• 34:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We have to commit them.
• 34:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Been treated that way.
• 34:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: All for talking about real life, all for talking about real life, and so for any company that's out there watching, any leaders, we're so happy to have you join us.
• 34:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But if you're gonna have, if you're gonna say you care about mental health, then you better damn well have policies in place and coverages in place that you're gonna cover if it is, if it's if it is like this experience I had, where we're gonna cover three visits at a hundred percent, then you shouldn't give a fuck if the person has been seen a counselor, a psychiatrist for 20 years or never at all.
• 35:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Or just don't even have the policy.
• 35:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's the way I look at it.
• 35:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Because the amount of people, again, the amount of people that want to, you know, talk about mental health, they'll say, oh, I support it.
• 35:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I support it.
• 35:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But once once you start talking about like yours and I'm talking about mine, people are like, oh, I'm not like that.
• 35:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I don't have those, I don't have those issues, I don't have those problems.
• 35:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Okay.
• 35:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: No problem.
• 35:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I do.
• 35:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I talk about them, and I share about them, and I'm happy to share.
• 35:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm happy to talk about because you know what?
• 35:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I know there's one person, at least one person, at least one person out there that is gonna relate to what not only this episode, but all the other 479 episodes that we have.
• 36:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And we're a charity.
• 36:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I put my blood, sweat, and tears, put my own money, hundreds of thousands.
• 36:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I believe in this.
• 36:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So don't give me this bullshit policy that well it only covers this, and you know, that's that's great.
• 36:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's that's great that you're you know, that you're recognizing that.
• 36:44
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Okay, enough of the lip service, back it up.
• 36:50
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There's a there's a term called big hat, no cattle.
• 36:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Just like big talk, no backing it up.
• 37:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And there's a lot of people who need some help, and so they should be able to just go get the help, and if it's the three visits, or if it's a different type of a mental health related, to include that at a more reasonable rate for people with your company insurance, whatever it is, just do it, be a leader.
• 37:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If you're you're calling yourself a CEO, an owner of a company, and you have employees, and you're paying you have the bet you have benefits for them, either do it or don't do it.
• 37:50
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Don't go in between, don't have this bullshit where it's like I said, well, you know, we this only covers, you know, you know, the this specific type of visit.
• 38:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Because everybody's gonna be like, oh yeah, good for you.
• 38:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Oh well and then and you know what?
• 38:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That make that makes people with mental illnesses like myself feel even worse when we when we get that that pity talk and that pity clap, whatever.
• 38:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's like, oh good for you that you went and did this.
• 38:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Don't treat me like a fucking baby.
• 38:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Treat me like a human being.
• 38:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Treat me like if you have children and they want help and they've been getting help, treat your employees like that.
• 38:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so, yeah, this has been a tough episode to kind of get through.
• 39:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Uh but the only reason why I go this deep is because it's true.
• 39:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And because if I hadn't gone been going to therapy, I wouldn't have stepped forward.
• 39:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Heck no.
• 39:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I would have been like, I don't got any problems.
• 39:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So to wrap this up, work does create stress.
• 39:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And the positions, you know, I talked about the computer and the week and a half.
• 39:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Okay.
• 39:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Let's say I have everything I need from a computer and software and all that.
• 39:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And you go in every day to work, right?
• 39:57
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And let's say let's say you do have structure at first.
• 40:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And then the next thing you know, depending on how the office layout is, they have cubicles.
• 40:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Let's just let's just say your your boss, your manager is right next to you.
• 40:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So, right, you got some structure, you're working on things, you you kind of have an idea in your mind how you'd like, you know, to go after different things.
• 40:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like for uh get to this in a second.
• 40:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so the per you know, so your boss is next to you, and so you got this some somewhat of structure working on things, and then every day you go in, your boss is waiting, and then you hear the knock on the side of the cubicle, or hear Justin, or Hayes, Hayes, Justin, well, however, however, you're addressed name-wise.
• 41:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Hey, I need can you uh look at this and this and this?
• 41:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um, I got a meeting in 30 minutes.
• 41:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Can you just grab that real quick?
• 41:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So all of a sudden my structure is moved.
• 41:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Okay, no big deal.
• 41:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's one time.
• 41:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But what happens day after day after day after day after day, after day after day after day after day after day, then for me, my mind is like, shit, what am I gonna work on today?
• 41:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I know it, you know, the regular stuff and that structure, but I know I'm gonna come in to they call these, they call them fire drills.
• 42:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There's because it's we need to do this now.
• 42:06
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's an emergency.
• 42:07
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I need to know this number, I need to know this customer, I need to know this type of product, what brand it is, whatever, whatever that is.
• 42:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And that right there, ladies and gentlemen, over the course of hours, days, months, and years, company to company to company to company, you have that, you have that I don't know what I'm gonna be doing today, and I know I'm gonna be limited, but the calendar of my boss is not shared with me, so I don't even know that they have a meeting coming up, and they knew that there was something that they were gonna need to ask me to do that they could have asked me the day before or a couple days before, and that's bad management.
• 43:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I get it, things come up from time to time, shouldn't be every single day.
• 43:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: All parts of the day, and then you're working on something, and then it's like, oh well, while you're doing that, can you do that?
• 43:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Just do this, because you know you're already gonna be doing this, so just do that as well.
• 43:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Then it's like, oh my gosh.
• 43:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Then it's you get into work, your boss isn't there, and you're like, oh my gosh, I can I can start working, you know, my structure.
• 44:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But then you open your email and you have three messages from your boss asking you to work on three different projects, and they have a meeting at a certain time, and they need it by that time.
• 44:20
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Nope, they need it earlier than that.
• 44:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so I so that caused me so many times to skip lunches because it was like I gotta I gotta do all these things on top of my regular duties.
• 44:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And this is when I know somewhat of a structure.
• 44:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so it creates additional stress, additional anxiety.
• 45:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so again, either the company supports the mental health or they don't.
• 45:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's what it comes down to, everyone.
• 45:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If you're gonna have a company and you're gonna have an employees, you know, there's different ways.
• 45:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It could be the contractor type where you know they're paid per project, or they can be full-time and have benefits, and it's taken out of their you know, hourly rate or wage or salary.
• 45:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So that's one way to look at things.
• 45:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Then there's other kinds of work where it's a little more straightforward where let's say you're looking at building a structure in a certain city, in a certain part of the city.
• 46:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You either go and see it, somebody locally of your organization, your company goes and you know, FaceTimes it and videos it.
• 46:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And the goal is to finish the structure to the specifications of who's building it, and so I know things can change also there, towards the end, where the main part of the structure 80-90% is as is, and there might be tweaks here and there.
• 46:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But that would be a that would be something that would be more for me because I don't think I've ever reached the 80-90% of my work having structure and then being able to replicate that for an additional structure in a different city, state, country, province.
• 47:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so I want to end this show in applauding, not the fake, you know, the the clapping that that bullshit.
• 47:45
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Take care of your mental health, take care of your physical health.
• 47:50
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I need to do a better job taking care of my physical health, but I'm doing what I I think is good.
• 48:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's it's serving me better.
• 48:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Let's say let's put it this way.
• 48:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's serving me better than if I didn't.
• 48:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I'll say it like that.
• 48:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And you know what?
• 48:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Even if you don't think you have a mental illness or anything, you know anything like that, I'm not like Justin.
• 48:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: He's super mental.
• 48:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Even if you don't even if you don't think you are people gossip, right?
• 48:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Why not go to a therapist and just let it out?
• 48:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: What's been happening in the last week, the last month, whatever the cadence.
• 48:57
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So how often you you see.
• 49:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And that right there, I remember when when I first started my therapy, and I was coming out of the deepest valley of my life, but also the best part of my life because I was I was starting to be a real person, a real human, not one that was, you know, doing the binge drinking and just not being the best human that I could be.
• 49:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So take care of yourself.
• 49:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's to your benefit, and that's that's really what matters.
• 49:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If we can't take care of our own self, how can we take care of others?
• 50:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I'm not the best at it, I'm not the greatest, nobody's perfect, I'm not perfect.
• 50:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: All I know is I'm better now than I would be if I wasn't seeing a psychiatrist, seeing a therapist.
• 50:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If you need medication, okay.
• 50:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I didn't want to take it.
• 50:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I was fighting that hard inside my mind.
• 50:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like Justin, you don't want to take that because then you're not gonna be able to drink alcohol, because you know, that's gonna interact with your medications.
• 50:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I just say to you, at that point, what's more important to you?
• 50:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Life, living life, maybe longevity, or I wanna I'm I wanna drink alcohol, I wanna do drugs, I wanna do I I mean those are they're choices, and we all we all get to make a lot of those ourselves.
• 51:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Some are made for us.
• 51:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Like I I'm like 5'8, 5'9, like I'm not gonna miraculously grow to be 6'6 or 6'8 and and and play American basketball.
• 51:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I mean, I'd love for that, but I I don't have control over that.
• 51:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I can't impact whether I'm 5'8 or 6'8.
• 51:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Yeah.
• 51:54
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So thank you for joining us.
• 51:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It was a it was a deep, deep episode.
• 52:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Thanks for being with us.
• 52:03
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• 52:13
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• 52:15
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• 52:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We're everywhere.
• 52:21
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• 52:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Let them know about the voices for voices, TV show and podcast.
• 52:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And let's until next time, let's celebrate the voices of everyone in the world.
• 52:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And within that, let's be a voice for ourselves and maybe somebody else that may need their voice to be shared, but may not be able to do that.
• 52:58
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so maybe you can help do that.
• 53:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So we'll see you next episode of the Voices for Voices TV show and podcast.
• 53:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Thank you so much for your love and support.
• 53:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And we're gonna be hitting episode 500 so soon.
• 53:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Thank you, thank you, thank you.
• 53:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We'll see you next time.
• 53:20
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Bye bye.