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For the Next Time You Feel Like You Failed… · Feel Really Good: Empowering Meditations

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  SPEAKER_00: Hi, I'm Brittany Atlas of Feel Really Good on Substack,
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  SPEAKER_00: and I'm excited to read my article to you.
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  SPEAKER_00: Try this the next time you feel like you failed.
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  SPEAKER_00: The trial and learning of perfectionism, people-pleasing, and treating life like an experiment.
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  SPEAKER_00: Last week, I didn't do what I said I would.
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  SPEAKER_00: I was in California,
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  SPEAKER_00: partly for my husband's work and partly for time with family,
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  SPEAKER_00: and before I left, I had a plan for Feel Really Good.
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  SPEAKER_00: I'd compile September shares into my monthly roundup email.
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  SPEAKER_00: I'd edit the soul spa recording for my premium subscribers.
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  SPEAKER_00: I'd release a new meditation.
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  SPEAKER_00: And feeling extra ambitious, I'd write an article too.
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  SPEAKER_00: This is what actually happened last week.
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  SPEAKER_00: I published the meditation.
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  SPEAKER_00: And that was it.
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  SPEAKER_00: On the flight back to Austin on Sunday,
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  SPEAKER_00: as soon as I started thinking about everything I didn't do,
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  SPEAKER_00: that old familiar voice of perfectionism crept in.
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  SPEAKER_00: And it was mean.
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  SPEAKER_00: You failed.
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  SPEAKER_00: You didn't follow through.
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  SPEAKER_00: You're not good enough.
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  SPEAKER_00: My logical mind knows that this isn't true.
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  SPEAKER_00: But if you're anything like me,
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  SPEAKER_00: a perfectionist,
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  SPEAKER_00: a people pleaser,
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  SPEAKER_00: or someone who's very hard on yourself,
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  SPEAKER_00: you know that the logical mind doesn't always get the final word
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  SPEAKER_00: when old thinking patterns kick in.
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  SPEAKER_00: The unkind internal dialogue.
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  SPEAKER_00: Here's how the pattern plays out for many of us.
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  SPEAKER_00: We build rigid rules about what, quote unquote, showing up has to look like.
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  SPEAKER_00: Then, if we mess up, again, quote unquote, even once, we tell ourselves that we've failed.
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  SPEAKER_00: Pretty unkind, right?
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  SPEAKER_00: And this is really hard for me to admit, but it's just the truth.
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  SPEAKER_00: I've been a wellness educator for over 13 years,
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  SPEAKER_00: and unfortunately,
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  SPEAKER_00: there have been many instances where it's been a do as I say,
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  SPEAKER_00: not as I do type of situation.
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  SPEAKER_00: I'd tell you how important it is to meditate daily,
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  SPEAKER_00: to rest often,
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  SPEAKER_00: and to honor what you need,
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  SPEAKER_00: but then I'd put myself on the back burner to keep showing up,
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  SPEAKER_00: no matter what,
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  SPEAKER_00: for everyone else,
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  SPEAKER_00: setting my own self-care aside,
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  SPEAKER_00: pushing through,
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  SPEAKER_00: putting myself last,
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  SPEAKER_00: delivering on every promise,
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  SPEAKER_00: even when it costs me sleep,
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  SPEAKER_00: time with loved ones, or eventually leads to a migraine.
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  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you're familiar with this too.
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  SPEAKER_00: Taking care of everyone else before taking care of yourself.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's time for us to interrupt that old pattern.
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  SPEAKER_00: Rewriting decades old patterns.
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  SPEAKER_00: Lately, I've been trying something different.
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  SPEAKER_00: I've been treating myself as though I'm just as important as everyone else.
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  SPEAKER_00: Prioritizing what caring for myself really means.
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  SPEAKER_00: And I've been treating life more like an experiment.
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  SPEAKER_00: We've all heard that we grow through trial and error.
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  SPEAKER_00: But to a recovering perfectionist, error can sound pretty harsh.
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  SPEAKER_00: But what if the way we see it can be reframed?
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  SPEAKER_00: What if life is just one big experiment?
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  SPEAKER_00: What if there's no such thing as failure, but simply things that we can learn from?
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  SPEAKER_00: That's how I'm learning to see consistency now.
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  SPEAKER_00: Consistency doesn't have to mean perfect.
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  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't have to mean showing up every single day in the exact same ways.
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  SPEAKER_00: We can.
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  SPEAKER_00: But we don't have to.
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  SPEAKER_00: Each week,
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  SPEAKER_00: there will be an ebb and a flow to how much we're able to give,
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  SPEAKER_00: to ourselves and to others.
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  SPEAKER_00: It won't always be exactly the same, and that's the beauty about being human.
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  SPEAKER_00: Now, I'm not saying our word doesn't matter.
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  SPEAKER_00: I believe deeply in showing up the way that you say you will, and the way that I say I will.
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  SPEAKER_00: But I started this Substack as an experiment,
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  SPEAKER_00: a space to share what lights me up Without falling into the social media trap
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  SPEAKER_00: of performing or squeezing myself into
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  SPEAKER_00: a must-show-up-every-single-day-and-create-constantly container.
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  SPEAKER_00: So I'm looking for a rhythm that's regular enough to actually be there for you,
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  SPEAKER_00: my community, without burning myself out in the process.
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  SPEAKER_00: I'm still figuring it out.
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  SPEAKER_00: Doing things differently.
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  SPEAKER_00: When that old voice showed up on Sunday, an extra piece occurred afterward.
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  SPEAKER_00: My deeper self.
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  SPEAKER_00: My core self, the one I'm learning to let speak up more often, answered back.
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  SPEAKER_00: She said, It's okay.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's more than okay.
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  SPEAKER_00: Making mistakes doesn't mean you failed.
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  SPEAKER_00: You got to learn something about yourself.
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  SPEAKER_00: And that's so important for coming home to yourself.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's okay that you spent time with your family instead of pushing past your limits.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's okay that you showed up for the people right in front of you instead of
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  SPEAKER_00: the whole wide world this week.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's okay that some things will be shared a little later than you planned or promised.
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  SPEAKER_00: You were honoring your own wellness in the meantime.
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  SPEAKER_00: I have to say I'm really proud of myself for letting that part of me speak,
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  SPEAKER_00: for remembering that I'm human.
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  SPEAKER_00: I'm not going to get it right all the time.
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  SPEAKER_00: I'm here to try things and learn from them.
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  SPEAKER_00: To those of you who were hoping for more from me last week,
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  SPEAKER_00: I want to thank you for your patience.
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  SPEAKER_00: And thank you for being a community where I feel safe enough to show up as a real person.
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  SPEAKER_00: One who's learning to simply be instead of going, going,
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  SPEAKER_00: going and doing, doing, doing because she thinks that's what she's supposed to do.
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  SPEAKER_00: I don't have this all figured out.
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  SPEAKER_00: I'm still in the trial and learning period.
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  SPEAKER_00: But I'm hoping that it leads me somewhere truly aligned with who I am,
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  SPEAKER_00: where I can show up for you and for me at the same time,
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  SPEAKER_00: and where I can finally feel like myself again.
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  SPEAKER_00: Let's put it into practice.
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  SPEAKER_00: The next time that old voice shows up and tells you that you failed,
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  SPEAKER_00: try treating the moment like a scientist would, with curiosity instead of judgment.
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  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to be trying this too.
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  SPEAKER_00: So try the following things out And treat it like a fun experiment
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  SPEAKER_00: to see what works best for you.
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  SPEAKER_00: For access to these steps to put this into practice,
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  SPEAKER_00: as well as this week's reflection journaling prompts,
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  SPEAKER_00: please become a paid subscriber.
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  SPEAKER_00: For just $8 a month,
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  SPEAKER_00: you have access to every ritual and life practice I share to help you come home
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  SPEAKER_00: to yourself.
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  SPEAKER_00: Thank you for being on this journey with me as I continue to come home to myself,
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  SPEAKER_00: and I sure hope that you're finding your way home too.
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  SPEAKER_00: Feel free to send me a message or share in the comments what resonated with you most
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  SPEAKER_00: in this article.
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  SPEAKER_00: And I really hope you're enjoying my weekly meditations as well.
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  SPEAKER_00: I look forward to sharing more with you next week.