Latest / The Other 16 Hours / Episode 4: The Art of Being a Beginner
Transcript
- Rachel Hawley: Hey everyone, welcome back to another episode of the Other 16 Hours podcast. My name is Rachel, and today I'm going to be doing a little solo episode for all of you, which I am very excited about, but I am going to miss Morgan. as you all know, we both work in corporate jobs, and both of our jobs oftentimes involve a lot of travel. So when we're both Traveling a lot, schedules may not align, and I think it'll be a great opportunity for us to sit down solo and share, you know, whatever's on our mind. Although it's not as fun as recording together. that was another thing I was actually thinking about recently. It's the fact that so many of the podcasters that I listen to, their full-time job is often podcasting, or, you know, their full-time influencers and one of their modes of creating content is is a podcast. So I feel like I don't listen to many podcasts where, they have a separate, full nine to five outside of their podcast, essentially. just brings a new I wouldn't call it a challenge, but just a new, perspective that I have is is in that like, you know, we're doing this in our free time and just doing it for fun. Anyway, so today I wanted to talk about something that I've been thinking about a lot lately and that is being a beginner. What does it mean to be a beginner? Is it bad to be a beginner? Is it good? I think it's, you know, definitely part of our culture in that like we want to be an expert at what we do, we wanna be good at what we do, like think about it, we are rewarded for being Good students, we want to do good at our jobs, we want to be good at whatever hobbies we're picking up, the fitness classes we take, and even the things that we do just for fun. And I think especially if you're someone who's naturally ambitious or a little competitive, it can be really hard to do something you're not immediately good at. I'm I'm looking at myself right now. Like I really do not like doing things that I'm not good at. probably speaking for others, you want to see progress, you want to know you're improving. And sometimes if you're not good at something right away, it's tempting to decide that maybe it's just not for you. And this is something that I've caught myself doing both professionally and personally. Over the last few years, you know, I transitioned from a pharmacy school to an industry fellowship, ended my fellowship early and transitioned into a field medical role. And I recently have started a new position in headquarters. in the commercial functional area in marketing. I've put myself in many new positions and in a in a sense forced myself to be a beginner again. And this has been a great thing. Like each transition has meant learning something new and being a beginner in a different way. personally as well, outside of work, I've also been trying new hobbies, different types of fitness classes and ways to stay active. And I realized that the same feelings of being a beginner, maybe having some imposter syndrome, can show up in one's personal life too. So today I want to talk about what it means to be a beginner, why it is oftentimes uncomfortable, and why I've been reminding myself that you don't have to be good at something for it to be good for you. I think one of the first places I really experienced this idea or this feeling of being a beginner again was transitioning from pharmacy school into industry. Like I was a learner. I knew how to be a good student. I knew how to take tests. I knew how to be engaging in class. I was also, you know. working in the pharmacy or working as a summer camp counselor and doing extracurricular things that at one point I was a beginner, but I will say I don't really think I've felt like a true beginner since I transitioned into industry after graduating from pharmacy school. So in pharmacy school, you know, we're we're used to a predefined structure. We have our classes, exams, rotations, we're given learning objectives. And there's a pretty clear idea of what you need to know. On the contrary, you enter a fellowship, and no matter if you have industry experience already, if you've done an internship, if you've done an appear rotation, I I truly feel like there's no real way to get a good grasp on what industry is like until you're actually a fellow or actually working there. And so when I started fellowship, I suddenly felt like I was in an environment that I had never been in before. I was, you know, exposed to a bunch of people and I didn't know how people worked together and you even what like the ultimate goal was so many different acronyms, new ways of thinking, and a new way of like applying my clinical background and more of a a business type environment. And then like on one hand, you know, you you're a beginner, you there's a lot that you don't know, but then you're also surrounded by people who have many, many years of experience. multiple decades of experience, institutional knowledge and expertise that I was just beginning to develop. And it was really easy to be like, my gosh, I feel so behind. I remember just taking a step back and being like, I have been here for a month or or six months and these people have been here for 15 years. And I should not be comparing how I'm feeling right now, what I know right now, to where they're at because we're in such different places. And I think this transition from being a student to a fellow really taught me that being smart or hardworking does not mean you'll automatically know how to do everything. Like not at all. The most important things you can do when making a big transition like this is knowing how to ask questions, being confident to ask those questions. Be willing to make mistakes and take risks and just give yourself time to learn. So after about a year and four months, I transitioned into a field medical affairs role after fellowship. After about six months into my fellowship, six months to a year was when I really felt like I was finding my groove. I was starting to understand how different people, how different cross-functional teams worked together. I was starting to piece like the big picture together into my head of why we're doing what we're doing, like what was the strategy behind it, what were the different tactical levers we were going to pull to, you know, drive our initiatives forward. And I feel like it was about that time where I was like starting to feel comfortable, more confident that, if you're doing a two-year fellowship, that's typically when you're starting to think about that next step and transitioning to a full-time role. So it was about a year and four months into fellowship that I had transitioned into a field medical position and, kind of felt like I was back to square one and had a brand new learning curve that I had to navigate and overcome. So at this point, you know, fortunately I was able to stay on at the same company. So there was a lot of things that I had already learned, been exposed to that were really important to. my full-time position, I already knew, you know, how the company worked, how I had a understanding of how industry worked. but now, it was my role to build relationships, navigate scientific exchange, scientific conversations, and figure out how to be an effective worker in a field-based role. Again, something that I had never done before. you know, again, would say there's a really big difference between understanding something conceptually. And I felt like I had a strong understanding of field medical just from talking to MSLs and, you know, working with them at conferences. But, you know, there's this there's still a big gap between understanding that conceptually and then actually being able to apply it confidently in the real world. And again, like I had to learn that confidence doesn't necessarily come before experience. Sometimes it comes because you've had the experience of doing something a little uncomfortable, learning from it, and then doing it again and again. And I feel like that was the case for me when I transitioned full-time into field medical. You know, you just kind of have to, I don't want to say fake it until you make it, but you just learn as you go and you grow in confidence over time. So over time, things that initially felt unfamiliar became more natural. You know, I was building relationships, developing my own approach to conversations, and definitely became more comfortable in the role in my, first full-time big girl job post-fellowship. But that sense of confidence and understanding definitely did not happen overnight. And it definitely did not happen because I knew everything on day one. and since then now I've made another transition. I recently moved into a headquarters commercial role. Again, still at the same company and still within the same therapeutic area. But now I've been exposing myself to a brand new functional area, a brand new perspective, and a different way of approaching problems. And there are things I know because of my previous experience, but there are also things that I need to learn and am learning from the people around me. And I think that's a really important distinction, is that you can bring experience into a new environment and still be a beginner. And I would say that really describes how I feel right now, a couple of months into this new role, in that I feel like I have a strong understanding, like I already said, of the company. of the therapeutic area, of how different cross-functional teams work together. But now that I've put myself in a new environment, different goals in a sense, different ways of working, different initiatives, going from a field based role to a headquarters based role, in some aspects I am very much so back to being a beginner. And I think what I've learned through this is you don't need to erase everything you've already learned to start something new. Like I carry those experiences, those learnings with me every day. And I think they're a huge value add and allow me to really contribute and have a different perspective. But I also, you know, are we also have to come with this approach to be willing to acknowledge what we don't know yet and be again willing to ask for help. And like I said this earlier, like you kind of feel like you're back to square one every time you maybe start over. And I definitely don't think that is a bad thing. I think it's healthy and I don't know, I just think it allows for a lot of opportunity to lean on others and and grow. I think we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to prove that we're competent and that we forget being new. is a perfectly reasonable explanation for not to know something. I feel like we joke in my company, like there's a certain amount of time that you can be new and then after you hit like certain months it's like, okay, you're not new anymore. You're a veteran, like you should know these things. And it's, you know, it's it's silly, but you know, that's not always the case. Like I think no matter how many years you've been in a career or in a position, in some aspects you will always be a beginner and there will always be something that you can learn. from someone else. And just acknowledging that and just knowing that that being new or being new to a concept or new to idea, new to a new to a tactic, is a very reasonable explanation for not knowing something. And it's kind of simple and basic, but when starting a new role, you're not supposed to know everything. Like that would be impossible. The point a lot of times is to learn, especially if you are a fellow. Like the point is to learn and not be the expert. And that sort of mindset, I guess, when making student to full-time, and from one full-time position to another. So that's It's brought me a a of peace, I a bit about my experience being a beginner in a professional setting. But I also wanted to talk a little bit about being a beginner outside of work. one of the examples that came to mind when thinking of ways I've I've been a beginner recently is through hobbies. So one example over the past couple of years I've been getting into is needlepoint. And If you're not familiar, needlepoint, it's kind of a it's a it's a craft, And you get a canvas and you get thread and you have a needle and you essentially just sew, we call it stitching. You stitch a canvas with different colors of thread and make a complete needlepoint project. And oftentimes, you know, you can turn it into an ornament or a pillow or you can get them framed. And it's a really, fun, relaxing hobby. A couple of my friends have also gotten into it. So it's something that I have enjoyed, getting to know other people while doing. But then also it's just a great thing to do, in in one's own time as a way to relax. So when I started needlepointing a couple of years ago, I was a true beginner. I was learning, watching YouTube videos, leaning on some of my friends that had been needlepointing for years. And the ki like the same thing that kind of happens when you're when I was in a professional setting where, you know, you start comparing yourself, you start comparing where you are to where other people are, what's happening again? And I'm like, my gosh, they're working on. such complex projects or their technique is so much better than mine. Like those sorts of feelings, thoughts started creeping in. And I think it's funny how we can, or how I can at least turn turn something that's supposed to be relaxing into another thing that we want to be good at. And now a couple of years later, I look back at the projects and some of them still aren't even finished I look at those projects that I started years ago when I was a beginner and I'm like, my gosh, this is such poor quality, or why did I not know how to do this? Like what was I doing? And have to remind myself again that I was a beginner at that point in time. And that is totally fine. there's nothing wrong with that. And there's actually something beautiful in that, being able to just look back and see how much progress you've made over time. And then also being respectful and honoring the work you did when you were a beginner or when you had less experience, because that just means you put yourself out there and had the confidence to try something new, even though I knew I wasn't good at it. So I need to be a little bit more kind to myself when looking back on these old projects, because you know, there there's no reason to compare. have to remind myself like this is a hobby. It's it's supposed to be fun and I don't need to be an expert at it. I think that is a big skill that Needlepoint has taught me. Like I can just sit down, work on something, enjoy the fact that I'm doing something different with my time. And I think that in itself is a skill, just learning how to enjoy the process without being so focused on the outcome. And again, something that I'm working on on a daily basis. Another example in more of my personal life that has come up recently is trying new fitness classes. If you listened to our episode from last week, which was all about fitness, working out, how we integrate that into a busy life, you would have heard that I am back in my class pass era It was an app that I used a couple of years ago when I first moved to Boston. But it's a really cool app in that it brings together a bunch of different fitness classes into one app. So you can essentially just take classes at different studios. You don't need to buy one specific membership of one specific studio. You can you can do a variety of things. So I recently re-downloaded ClassPass and have been trying new forms of classes. So I did Berry's for the second time, first time in Boston. A week ago, I did my first cycle bar class, which is a cycling studio. And this morning actually I did my first handlebar heat class, which is kind of like a Matt Pilates infrared hot, I wouldn't even call it yoga, but studio. I felt it this morning. Like there's there's something about w walking into a class for the first time that can make you feel like everyone else knows what they're doing. Like they know where to stand, they know where the equipment is, they know where the locker room is, they know where the bathroom is. Like when the instructor says something, they know exactly what position their body's supposed to be in and and what to expect next. And I think instead, maybe in the past, that would have made me feel anxious. I just don't think I care. And I say that in the best way possible. There are people that are around you that are more than willing to listen and more than willing to help if you just ask. So that's exactly what I did. I'm like, hey, this is my first class. there's no harm in asking that. And more often than not, people are gonna be more than willing to help you get to where you need to go I think something that's interesting about this feeling and the situation that we we put ourselves in is it shows how uncomfortable we can be with being visibly experienced. And there's always going to be someone who may judge you for that or or may think like, this person's new. They don't know what they're doing. But I think we just need to reframe our mindset as maybe the person who is inexperienced. As well as if we're in a situation where you are the person with more experience and you see someone who's trying something new and just like really praising that and honoring it and being like, wow, that's incredible. Like this person is stepping outside of their comfort zone, doing something that they've never done before and they're just going for it. And who cares if they're good at it, if they're not good at it? just the fact that you're trying is such a incredible thing that should be celebrated. Regardless. And as we know, if you keep showing up, it gets easier. Whether that's in the work setting, you keep showing up for work, you just understand how things work better on a day-to-day basis. Same thing. If you're going to a fitness class over and over again, it gets easier. You're learning the movements, you're becoming more comfortable. And maybe, you know, you're oftentimes going to start to enjoy that challenge, but you can never get to that point without willing to be the new person. this has me thinking about how we approach hobbies more generally. So if you know me, you know I'm a big goal setter. Like I literally make a bingo board at the beginning of every year with all the different goals and things that I would like to accomplish. Speaking of the bingo board, like I love checking it off and crossing off boxes and tracking my progress, challenging myself and working towards something. And I definitely, I don't think there's anything inherently Wrong with that. goal setting can be incredibly motivating. It helps us stick with things long enough so that we can see improvement. But I do think that there's a point where that mindset can spill into every part of our lives and we start tracking everything. Like, for example, if you want to hit a certain number of classes, this was something that was on my bingo board last year. Like I wanted to do 125. yoga classes, or maybe you're training for a marathon or some sort of race, and you want to hit a certain mileage goal or a certain time goal. You want to finish a certain number of projects or read a certain number of books a year, whatever it is that you're trying to become better at. And suddenly your hobby starts to feel like work. And it starts to feel like a burden And at that point, like is it even a hobby anymore? you ask yourself, am I enjoying this? Am I and then you're like, am I improving? Am I doing enough? Am I getting better? And I'm not saying like I don't think we should stop setting goals, but I do think it's worth having a few things in our lives where the goal is simply to enjoy ourselves and and just do something for the joy of doing it. And I'm trying to think like what in my life is is like that as someone who really does try to be the best I can be and challenge myself in so many ways. but I do think like cycling, I I don't put pressure on myself to like you need to do a certain number of miles a week or you need to do certain number of rides a month. if the opportunity presents itself, it's a beautiful day, just Go outside, ride my bike, move my body, be in nature, feel good. that in itself is the goal. Same thing with needle pointing. It's like I don't need to finish all these projects by a certain deadline. I'm not some machine or some factory just churning out finished projects. It's something that I do because it helps me relax, it helps me unwind. It's something that I can do with my hands and get my, you know, face out of a screen. And again, just do it for the sake of enjoying it. And also with workout classes, too. Like I don't need to do a certain number a week. It's fun to explore different forms of exercise and to challenge myself in a new way and strengthen my body in different ways than I have in the past to just try to be as healthy and and strong as I can be. So I guess what I'm trying to say is that. Not everything needs to become a lifelong passion and not everything needs to become a part of one's identity. sometimes the best thing that you can do, like sometimes it's enough just to try something new and just enjoy that experience for what it is. So the last thing I want to talk about is something I said at the beginning of this podcast, and a quote that's kind of stuck with me. And it's that you don't have to be good at something for it to be good for you. I wanna say that again. You don't have to be good at something for it to be good for you. when I think about this, sometimes I think about work, like in in some regards, I'm I'm not the best. I'm still learning. But it's stretching my brain and forcing me to think in ways that I never have before, and that is so healthy and and so good for me and my personal and professional growth. I think about cross-country skiing and mountain biking. And again, I am by no means a pro. I am not the kind of person that's just sending it and is like incredible at at these sports. But again, they're so good for me. Like I'm putting myself in social settings. I'm meeting new people. I'm out in nature. I'm moving my body. And that's what it is for me. And that's all that it needs to be. I think this topic resonates with me so much, is because being a beginner forces you to confront your relationship with achievement. So if you're someone who's used to doing well in school, probably just started your career, you're working towards goals. It can feel really uncomfortable to enter an environment when you're not immediately competent. more often than not, you'll probably compare yourself to other people. You're gonna feel behind. You may wonder whether you're wasting your time if you don't feel like you're making tangible progress. But I think that is the point. I think there's something so important to just learn how to sit in that discomfort and be a beginner at something. And again, like you're not a beginner in life. We come with experiences, perspective, everything else we've learned from other parts of our lives, and just applying those things in a new context. in that vein, there's something really freeing about allowing yourself to be a little bit bad at something without making it mean anything about you or who you are. Like you're not bad at life because you can't keep up at a fitness class. You're not failing because your needle point isn't perfect. You're not wasting your time because you tried something new and decided it wasn't for you. Like that is the last thing from wasting one's time. in my opinion. I think that at the end of the day is the point. And when thinking about this podcast and the name of this podcast, the other 16 hours, we have these these additional 16 hours outside of work. And I oftentimes feel like they need to be optimized and I need to be maximizing them and doing the most with them. But that's not the case. Like some of those hours can be and should be just spent learning. They can be spent resting. trying something new and even discovering something that maybe you're not very good at. And all of those things have a very meaningful place in a fulfilling life. And you don't have to be good at something for it to be good for you. So if there's one thing I hope you can take away from this episode is is just that you don't have to be good at something for it to be good for you. And you don't need to be the best person in the room. You don't have to be a master at a skill and you don't have to stick with something forever. Just simply try something because it interests you. And I want to challenge you all, if you've been putting off trying something new or putting yourself in a new environment because you're worried you won't be good at it. That's likely what's gonna happen, you know? Like you may not be good at it, but by doing so, you're giving yourself permission to be a beginner. And you're giving yourself the opportunity to try. And I want us to all think, like, what would we try if we knew we didn't have to be good at it? Like I'm thinking and reflecting on this myself. Like, what would I try if I knew I didn't have to be good at it? I it's a hard question to ask and a hard thing to think of. But you know, it just it just forces us to think outside of our our own comfort zone. So maybe it's something creative, maybe it's a sport you've always wanted to try. Maybe it's going somewhere alone. Like maybe it's literally just going to a coffee shop by yourself and reading a book. Or taking yourself out for a nice meal. Maybe it's learning something unfamiliar, joining a group in which you don't know anyone who's a part of it, but you're interested in it. So you're just gonna put yourself out there. so I challenge all of us to think about that this week and what that could mean for us because we're spending, we're gonna spend a lot of our lives working towards things, trying to improve. Building expertise, and there's nothing wrong with that. But I also hope we have room to be curious and to experiment and to enjoy things just for the sake of enjoying them. So I want to thank you all for spending some of your other 16 hours with me today. And I will talk to you next time.