Latest / DA CREW Podcast / SEASON 2 DA CREW PODCAST EPISODE _1 _HOST BLAQUE DIAMOND

Transcript

SEASON 2 DA CREW PODCAST EPISODE _1 _HOST BLAQUE DIAMOND · DA CREW Podcast

0:11
The book A Song for Sopora, written by David Harris, is a powerful
0:16
historical fiction centering around the life and character of Moses's future wife Zupporah before they
0:23
met. Book author David Harris brings the reader into the relationship between Moses and
0:28
Zuppora, which was gradual and lush. The story unfolds beautifully when Moses finally
0:33
acts Upporah to marry him. Purchase your copy of the book detailing this authentic
0:38
story, A Song for Zuppora by David Harris today. It's available online at
0:44
Barnes Andnoble and Amazon dot Com at Wings of Transformation. Published At Wings of
0:55
Transformation Publishing, we are committed to helping our authors reach their goals and pursue
1:00
their dreams of becoming published authors. We work closely with each author to ensure
1:04
a successful publishing experience, and we are dedicated to helping them tell their stories
1:11
in the most meaningful and impactful ways. We look forward to putting you on
1:15
the path to writing your book. Hello, Hello Heyo, and welcome.
1:33
Hello Hello Heyo, and welcome to the Crew podcast. I am the Visionary
1:41
Queen Angela and welcome to Season two. I want to thank you for tuning
1:47
in and for all of your support throughout season one, We're back them devas
1:55
of the Airways, So thank you for joining us tonight. Share this with
2:01
someone in your circle. Basic Black after Dark, that all new podcast show
2:15
with your host, Black Diamond. Hello, Hello, Hello everybody. This
3:13
is Black Diamond, your host of Basic Black after Dark, and we are
3:16
here on season two of the Crew podcast Network. This is the show that
3:22
meets you where you are and gives you what you ask for. Who would
3:25
have thought that successful transformation requires an integrated approach that links strategy to transformation,
3:32
transformation to ambition, and ambition to execution new discipline. What new discipline do
3:42
you need to have a breakthrough? My guest tonight knows all about breaking through.
3:46
They are here to teach you how to bounce back. Meet to Wanna
3:52
take a certified pharmacy tech and a self made boss. Evet Jefferson, a
3:57
nurse, realtor and mental for girls of Hugs for Life. Crystal Thompson is
4:02
a realist who's going to have her say. And Shamika Hamilton, an Army
4:08
and Navy vet and licensed clinical social worker, life coach and youth counselor shelanda
4:15
inspirational treasure. WILLIAMS. Leonard is a certified life coach with a focus on
4:21
mental health support, Certified grief and Bereavement counselor, inspirational speaker, CEO,
4:29
Media personality with the number one best selling book and Last but not Least and
4:33
Least but not Least our visionary. Taysha Bryant the parent, healer and author,
4:41
speaker, therapeutic life coach. She is the founder and CEO of of
4:46
We Have a Purpose Incorporated. Welcome ladies of bounce Back to Basic Black After
4:53
doc. Hi, ladies, thank you so much for joining me tonight.
5:01
I have just been overwhelmed with having you here tonight. I've been reading your
5:05
bios and just anxiously trying to get my questions together for you and what I
5:11
wanted to ask, and it's just I thank you. I thank you so
5:15
much. Taisha. What inspired you to have the vision to create the bounce
5:20
Back Conference? So the year COVID for my birthday, I was like,
5:27
I want to do something for the month of March. It is Women History
5:31
Month, is Social Work month, and it's my birthday. So I wanted
5:34
to celebrate, like in a major way and it was when I turned thirty,
5:39
so I was like, I'm going to do thirty women for the month
5:44
of March. So from that moment, it was like, you know what
5:48
this needs to be live. You know it needs to be in person because
5:53
not only do I have a story, many others have a story that you
5:58
know that's going to heal and help someone else. So just creating that platform,
6:02
in that space for people who are don't normally speak, who has yet
6:06
to be on a platform to share that story. I was like, Hey,
6:12
this is what we're going to do. God, I thank you for
6:15
allowing it to be what it is, and we just kind of we just
6:17
kind of flow with it. Last year was our first one and it was
6:21
absolutely dynamic. So it's time from two point zero, So you do have
6:28
your thirty women for this year or are you looking at higher numbers? Okay?
6:33
So I did the thirty women because it was during COVID everyone was at
6:40
home so it was virtual. So each each week it was like about I
6:46
won't' say about six or seven women on but now that we are live.
6:50
Last year I had ten women speakers. This year, I'm actually doing five
6:56
because I don't want them to feel brushed. I want them to get out
6:59
what's nessa's there without the event being prolonged. So we have five speakers and
7:06
we also have three breakout sessions. So after the speakers speak, they're going
7:14
to break out and we're going to find out what that heart looks like.
7:17
We're gonna let some things go, and we're gonna learn about self care.
7:23
So you get you get all of it. You get the meat and the
7:26
potatoes. While you're sounds like it's going to be a wonderful event, it
7:30
sounds like it's just chock full of so much information. And I employ everybody
7:36
to go to it. If they can't go to it, to listen to
7:41
find out how they can get involved. For next year, we're gonna get
7:44
into that too. Can you, ladies, walk us through your career path
7:47
and share how you experience shape your approach to success. Okay, So I
7:58
guess I just jump in open with relaxed and be comfortable. It's Friday Jumping.
8:05
Wherever you want to jump in at, I got you, so I
8:07
go first. For me, it started at a young age, being pregnant
8:11
at thirteen and seeing my cousins and things of that nature go through the foster
8:16
care system. I knew I wanted to give back. Our house is always
8:18
open. Everyone would live with us, whether it was a day or week,
8:24
a month or whatever. And my mom was always a caregiver. She
8:28
was in the medical field. And I was like, I know, I
8:30
want to help people, but I can't do blood, throw up and all
8:33
that stuff. So I was like, I'm gonna be a pormosist. Yeah,
8:37
that didn't work. So I met this lady from this program called Tears
8:43
when I was in high school, and her name is Angelie L. Walton,
8:48
and I was like, the program she's doing, I want to do
8:50
this. So I started working with her right out, right out of high
8:54
school, and I fell in love with the adolescent population because I was in
9:01
that point, you know, having a baby at thirteen, We're being pregnant
9:05
at thirteen and haven't heard at fourteen. I wanted somebody to be what they
9:09
were to me. So social work was the feel for me. And I've
9:15
been in the social service field since I was eighteen. Don't right, all
9:20
right, I'm in that field, hey, social worker. I know it's
9:24
the reason that we all get into social work. And some people ask,
9:28
what made you go into social work. It's just like what makes you put
9:31
on a pair of pants in the morning, you know, when it comes
9:35
to social work. For me, so it's just that easy to just want
9:37
to come into that field, even though we're in some of the least respected.
9:43
But I'm not gonna get into that because I could take this whole show.
9:46
We're gonna go into that another time, Coach or either Crystal, Crystal,
9:50
I definitely got some questions for you too later. Good go ahead,
9:58
Crystal, go ahead, Chris. Now I got to hold on. I'm
10:00
not she said, Coach. I'm not a coach, well not yet,
10:05
not yet, but okay, Well, I got into this because I'm a
10:13
love walker by nature, and I think I've always been this person, and
10:18
then I found out there was a name for it, kind of like you
10:22
know, being a prophet and finding out that there's a name for it,
10:24
you know some stuff, you know, know why they don't know it,
10:28
you know, but they don't know it, So then you find out that
10:30
there's a name. And so I think it was the same thing for me
10:31
with coaching, with with UH, with doing ministry full time. Really it
10:37
was my heart for the people and my vision of seeing people suffering, and
10:43
everybody too busy in their own world to notice. And so you know,
10:48
that's kind of my heart's desire to reach those who literally have some similar stories
10:52
to mine. I'm very relatable and transparent for that purpose. Probably not your
10:56
typical apostle for that purpose, because any people need to hear somebody say like,
11:01
we get it, and we're not about to beat you down for you
11:05
to get it. We're gonna love you so you can heal it. And
11:07
so it's my passion, it's my it's my it's my world. And even
11:11
if I didn't have a title for it, I would still be it,
11:15
if that makes sense. You have a title, You're gonna come up with
11:18
one before the end of this show. You have a title, it's you
11:24
know, when I'm on TikTok, I have this whole thing where it's like,
11:26
you know, this is the inspirational treasure AKA this person, this person,
11:31
this person, and I am whoever that I am want to be to
11:35
you today. So I take on whatever hat he wants me to put on
11:39
it. So I do have the titles, but even if I didn't,
11:41
I would still love it. There you go. It depends on who's seeing
11:46
you and for what their purpose is. Because everybody that comes to see you
11:48
speak to you, enjoy you, and in your company. I could be
11:52
there and once I leave you, I've gotten something different from you than person
11:56
that's gonna come in and see you. So what you want to me will
11:58
be there than what you are to somebody else, but you, So there
12:03
you go. Absolutely, you don't that sound about right? That's kind of
12:07
what I say all the time. Definitely, Hey, I am Crystal.
12:20
I am I don't have many accolades. I don't have lots of things to
12:26
tell you that I've done. I haven't done a lot of work. A
12:28
lot of my work was in the streets, so they don't they have names
12:31
for it. But I'm no longer those things. So we definitely and we
12:39
I hope we do. But look, the thing is I personally, I'm
12:43
a medical building specialist, medical billing coding specialist. I'm also a clinical medical
12:50
assistant. I'm a mother, a grandmother, a friend, and I'm also
12:58
the host of the Row Recovery podcast. I came about that through my own
13:07
cycle of my whole the I've been cleaned almost thirteen years. July the fifth
13:13
will be thirteen years clean from cocaine. God did God? God? God,
13:18
yes, God? Okay. So here in my mind I was thinking,
13:22
you know, purpose, Okay, I can tell people, you know,
13:26
how to do this, how to do that, but like what I
13:28
know for real, people don't want it the way I want to give.
13:31
I need to give it because like, you can't talk to somebody about addiction
13:35
in a clinical way. That's the reason why rehab is a failure. It's
13:41
just you have to talk to somebody that's actually been on it. And the
13:46
gift that I have is actually expressing that without guilt, without shame. And
13:52
once I realized that having no shame was a ministry, I was like,
13:58
oh okay, while everybody else lying, I could just be real. Oh
14:09
my god, you don't have to remember anything either. It's just there about
14:13
what it is. I don't got this sweet story to give you about well
14:18
now and this and I became that, and then and then and then my
14:24
children they have all of these things, and then I don't have that story.
14:28
I'm sorry. But if you want to be delivered, I am here
14:33
so you can see that delivery is for you and it is possible. So
14:37
is sobriety. That is my gift. That is what I do. Yes,
14:43
she said, She said she didn't have nothing to say, no stories.
14:48
We're gonna chop it up and I got you. Yeah to Linda,
14:54
Yes, yes, inspirational treasure. See where you're coming from with that?
15:01
Many women have lost themselves with pursuing their dreams and letting life lead them or
15:07
letting go period. I understand grief has no set pattern. It's expressed differently
15:13
among individuals. Some are expressive and public with their emotions. Others like to
15:18
keep their feelings private or bottled up, and others are stuck they don't know
15:22
what to feel. How do you know they are grieving With all of that,
15:28
how do you know when you're speaking with someone that they're grieving. Well,
15:35
I would like to say that I know because I'm kind of looking for
15:37
the signs, But honestly speaking, it's because I am inspired, if that
15:43
makes sense. God will let me know in the moment. I'm one of
15:46
those people that you can't really give me fluff and expect me to play with
15:50
it, you know what I mean. Like we can be having a whole
15:52
conversation, you could be bouncing around and joyful and happy and skipping and all
15:56
that, and I'm gonna be like, soh, Tevin was really on your
16:00
heart, you know, and I don't do and I'm not going to do
16:08
it in a way to embarrass a person. I'm not, you know,
16:11
I don't want to embarrass you. I just want people to know that there's
16:15
a place that you can be safe enough to actually express it. And here's
16:18
the truth is is that we've kind of been programmed to stuff things down right,
16:23
to not be honest, to not say this is how I'm really feeling.
16:26
You know, you can't go to your boss and say I need time,
16:30
I need space so I can get past this, because you don't really
16:33
have much grace given in the world. And I do get that, you
16:37
know, we have we have we have, you know, a quota we
16:40
need to meet, we have a standard we need to set. But we
16:42
do so much of that that we lose track of what people are feeling.
16:47
And so people just don't say I don't need to express it because if I
16:51
do, I might lose my job. I don't need to say it because
16:52
if I do, my family gonna be like, girl, get up to
16:53
get over it. Right. We don't have much appreciate allowance, allowance to
17:03
be in grief because I will teach people it's okay to feel what you feel
17:08
when you are feeling it, but we just want to give you some tools,
17:11
baby, so you can start digging yourself out of it, because you
17:14
do have the power to do that. And everything that happens in your life
17:18
is because it's what you desire to either keep or get rid of. So
17:22
it's a longe LIFs learn say that all my time. Can grief be prolonged
17:29
or intense? It can be super intense, and it definitely can be prolonged.
17:33
Sometimes people feel guilty about not grieving, right, It depends on what
17:37
the situation is. Yeah, Yeah, that you can counsel someone who feels
17:42
guilty after grief. It's not difficult for me at It's not difficult for me
17:48
at all, because I'm gonna be that for the long haul, you know
17:51
what I mean. Like, seriously, if you're on day one, if
17:53
you're on day one hundred and you got to go today three hundred and twenty
17:56
two, then we're going to figure out a way to get you from one
18:00
hundred to three twenty two. Because love is long suffering. Love doesn't just
18:03
give up because it can't. And if there's something that I cannot do,
18:07
then I'm gonna find the person that may be able to help you in the
18:10
next branch of this thing. You know, I don't I don't encourage everybody
18:14
to make it seem like they have that quality. But even if you can't,
18:18
find somebody who can and let them walk at their own pace. Because
18:22
anybody who rushes through something, anybody who's forced through something, it's not ever
18:26
going to be a genuine healing. It's gonna be a force. Let me
18:29
put a mask on healing. I get that. I get it so much.
18:33
You're also an author, and you went deep with your title book,
18:37
what if God is all of us? I'm gonna say, what if God
18:42
is all of us? Silanda? What if God is all of us?
18:48
We'll act right if you really believe that. And when I say act right,
18:55
I mean, come on. You know how many people on a regular
19:00
and we know they're hurting, but instead of us actually be bearing the burdens
19:03
of one another as we are. You know, many of the people I
19:07
talk to have a Christian background or some type of religious background. And I
19:10
don't care what religion you're following. Somewhere in them clauses, it's telling you
19:14
to love people and treat people well. But those are some of the very
19:18
people who will you know you're not doing this and you're not doing that.
19:22
And it's like, okay, wait a minute, pause, two seconds pass,
19:25
two seconds past two seconds, because if you can pause two seconds,
19:27
you can actually hear somebody talk, You can actually understand that. Uh.
19:33
You may think you have like five religious but you really have a billion different
19:37
denominations of people who believe different things. And so if I can talk to
19:41
you and understand who you are, especially if I believe that God is all
19:45
things at the same time all the time, you can't be omnipresent and not
19:48
be with everybody. And so I'm not gonna treat you like you're any less
19:52
than who I am. And so if God is all of us, if
19:56
we begin to entertain that, we'll be able to walk this walk that we
20:00
proclaim we want to walk. But if we ignore that, then we're gonna
20:03
keep stepping on people to get to where we want to get, telling people
20:06
to shut up when they the screen. One of our viewers in saying that,
20:11
yes, that's how I feel like I'm being rushed, and when you
20:14
were talking, I was saying, and I'm guilty. I'm guilty. I'm
20:18
one of those people because when I know and I'm scared of the Lord I'm
20:21
talking about, somebody scared what I do when somebody ain't doing right, I
20:26
step aside and I go point like that, like that person's right over there.
20:30
Please don't mistake me for that person. I'll step aside a minute and
20:33
people will see me like what's wrong because I'm feeling that we're not together.
20:38
But when you do stuff, you know, you know what? This is
20:42
what I learned. I learned that a lot of us we take and this
20:47
is no dis to anybody. I don't try to get people not to feel
20:49
what they feel. But I follow the message of Christ Joshua, which is
20:56
Jesus in English. And if I if I follow that path, there's no
20:59
fear for me and God, I'm not scared of him. I have reverence,
21:03
but I don't have fear because perfect love cast out fear. And so
21:06
that's another you know work, walking people through that step, letting them know
21:08
that they're worth their feelings, letting them know that, yeah, your mess
21:11
up. God made all conditions. He knew exactly what was gonna happen with
21:15
you. This is your process. You got to grow through your process,
21:18
so letting me help you through your process. The Great commission is about again
21:22
bearing the burdens of one another. So my question is what's your burden?
21:26
You know what I mean? If I can I carry a little bit of
21:29
that? Can I carry a little right now? Don't worry about it at
21:34
the time. If I had the time tonight, but baby, I would
21:37
come see now, see this is why you put the end and inspiration.
21:42
You are truly truly a treasure and man, we thank you. But I'm
21:47
gonna dig on into you because I'm gonna get your information because we gotta talk.
21:52
I starts going through some books. Well maybe I will have me here
21:55
at least. Let me let me say this before I do go. This
21:59
bounce back in experience for me when I get to go. First of all,
22:03
I don't know if Ty you should mention or didn't mention, but she's
22:06
one of my spiritual daughters, and I feel like if nobody else can show
22:11
up to say, hey, I applaud you, then who else is going
22:14
to do it? Also, I know what the bounce back looks like in
22:17
her right, we've probably been doing this well eight nineteen years, and I
22:21
know the bounce back in her, and so it just I feel honored to
22:26
be able to come and tell my story of sexual addiction, or tell my
22:30
story about you know, homelessness, or tell my story about five kids out
22:33
of wedlock, and tell my story about how when I had the six one
22:37
in marriage, I still didn't feel like I was complete. So you know,
22:40
I guess we get to tell how we we fall down but we bounced
22:45
back, and I'm excited to be able to be there for the process.
22:48
And so it's my humble honor. I can't wait and I'm honored to be
22:52
here with y'all tonight. So thank y'all for having me. Thank you so
22:56
much for being here, and y'all enjoy your evening, and thank you.
23:02
We're gonna stay in touch. We do this. Blessed this, Ladnor,
23:11
Thank you now, Krystal. The human experience is a complex, multifacet thing,
23:17
shaped by the countless events and interactions that shape our lives. Crystal Thomas
23:22
has a story to tell. You heard a little bit of it. It's
23:25
unique personal narrative that speaks to the joys, triumphs, struggles and successes.
23:30
That defines who she is. And she told you about who she was and
23:34
how she was able to bounce back. So we are fortunate enough to have
23:38
you here tonight to share your story, a story that needs to tell.
23:44
Give me you know what, I've been curious because when you said that you
23:47
have a story, you're not gonna say nothing yet, So he wasn't gonna
23:49
send me a little bit more information. What's your backstory? Well, I'm
23:56
a country girl. I'm from Arkansas and raised. My mother was a preacher,
24:04
I have I had a step father, very abusive, completely abusive to
24:10
my mother and myself and my other siblings. And even through all of that,
24:17
that molestation happened. Gosh, Now, if you're uncomfortable with anything,
24:23
did you do not have to share it. If you're so uncomfortable with everything,
24:27
uncomfortable everything, that's not my intent to make you uncomfortable. I'm okay,
24:33
I'm definitely not uncomfortable. No, but growing up that way made me
24:38
hyper sexual. Because that's what happens to a lot of molested women. Some
24:45
of them turn they go the opposite way. Well, I found out that
24:48
men were weak for us. And once I realized that, because to have
24:53
myself taken all the time, just taking, just violating me, they taken,
25:00
it felt normal to be taken, so to speak, and I got
25:07
used to that. So after so long of being taken, you don't feel
25:14
a value, so you you don't have a problem giving it away either.
25:18
So I did lots of that. And to be able to do that,
25:23
I needed something that was gonna numb the voices, the mind, my mind,
25:27
the past, all of all of that, because I couldn't get into
25:30
them sexually for real, for real. I had to have something. And
25:37
one day I picked up cocaine. I was actually selling it. I was
25:42
selling crack actually, and to make crack you need cocaine. So I had
25:47
some cocaine one day and it was my twenty fourth birthday and I decided,
25:53
instead of weed today to smoke, why not do some power? And I
26:00
did and I loved it and I fell in love with it. And it
26:03
was to be to choose that drug. You don't, really, that's not
26:10
a time. Oh let me boom. It's time for me to start my
26:12
co co addiction. That's not how it went, you know what I mean,
26:17
It happened I found out I loved it, and it became my friend.
26:22
I was the first person that I spoke to. You're not the first
26:27
person I spoke to that told me that they loved it. You know,
26:32
the first time I heard somebody tell me that they loved it, it kind
26:36
of threw me back, and I was like, wait a minute, did
26:38
they say what I thought they said? But then when I started speaking to
26:41
them, like I'm hearing you, I started to understand more of what you're
26:47
saying, not that you said it, what you're saying. So I learned
26:51
to listen. See, she would be so proud of me right now,
26:53
even though she left. I learned to listen. I've learned to listen differently
27:00
than what And I think a part of it, I'm gonna be honest,
27:03
maybe a part of it was judgmenttal it I heard it, you know,
27:07
That's that's what I believed, that it really wasn't gonna be honest about it,
27:10
you know. Maybe I guess it was because it was somebody I knew
27:15
that I grew up with, and I wasn't expecting that, so it was
27:18
a shock to hear it. And I guess I did judge them at that
27:22
time. But then as they told me, you know, stuff that I
27:26
didn't know about them, that's when I was listening differently, and and I
27:30
was really really happy that they was able to open up to me. I
27:34
guess they figured I was the person that they could but I had apologized for
27:37
the stairs that I was giving them as like, I guess I was in
27:41
shock too, because we grew up together and to hear that, why were
27:48
you in shock? Well, I was from when I was young. We
27:51
were minors, so that was one of the things that I was shocked about
27:53
because I didn't think children at that time did things like that. You know,
27:57
we were we were both I'm saying, well, that was a different
28:00
time. Some children, some children aren't children. You don't know why they're
28:04
doing what they're doing. But that's what I'm saying. So to hear everything
28:07
that this person was telling me, I was listening differently, you understand,
28:14
because as as a child listening and somebody's telling you something, you're hearing about
28:18
the marijuana, and at that time that was supposed to be the biggest thing
28:19
as a child hearing it. But when you started hearing about hard drugs,
28:26
it just at that time it blew me. If I had been older than
28:29
they had told me about it, I would have probably listened differently. But
28:32
being a kid listening to it, it just blew me out, blew me
28:34
out. But I get those stairs and guess what I do. I love
28:40
them. And guess what I do to those people staring? I eat them
28:44
a live because guess what the truth that I'm telling? Beat the lie you
28:49
hide. I don't have to hide. I don't have to lie because coke
28:56
addiction ain't the only addiction. I'm no fat folks at home can't push a
29:00
plate back. I know folks sitting at home with me and they can't do
29:04
nothing with and they staying with them. I know people that can't stop stealing.
29:08
It's a whole lot of addictions. Line line, line, Can we
29:14
talk about the line each other? Unlike what God told you to do?
29:18
All of that is ugly. But when God can take me and do what
29:23
He's done, rather I ever accumulate millions, whether I ever be able to
29:27
speak before a crowd or anything, He cleaned me up. He proved to
29:30
me that I was good enough to be on the right standing of where I
29:36
needed to be. I didn't have to beg nobody to forgive me for my
29:38
past. I didn't have to. Oh, I'm so ashamed. No,
29:42
I was not. I was not speak There is one thing that I always
29:49
try to give, the one analogy I give people all the time. If
29:53
you could get up right now, and this is to you hosts, if
29:57
you could get up right now, forget what money you got in the bank.
30:02
If somebody told you right now you could get up on a plane.
30:06
They about to get you a plane ticket. And what's your favorite place?
30:10
Tell me a place you want to go to. You've you've never you haven't
30:12
been, you haven't been there? Where have you? Where do you want
30:17
to go to? Italy? Okay? So Italy? Every month every day
30:23
you get to take you a flight to Italy to see the sights, feel
30:30
good, enjoy that atmosphere, all of that stuff, the good stuff you
30:36
phi right, Cocaine is a trip you If you could get up and go
30:42
where you wanted to go every day, Yeah, I'm getting on that plane.
30:48
That is how people stay addicted. They don't want to come down and
30:52
land to reality. It's easy to stay in flight. Unbelievable. And when
31:00
you got people that's gonna judge you like, we constantly get judged. It's
31:06
hard to stay there. Some people give up the fight to stay sober because
31:11
of the judgment, because well, I could care less about a human being
31:15
caring anything about what I've done, because no earthling is gonna walk me out
31:18
of my purpose. No earthling can down me, No earthling, not one.
31:25
You don't get to do it. You don't get to do it.
31:26
You don't have no right. I don't care where you sit, how high,
31:30
how low, what you make, what you got, because guess what,
31:33
you ain't gonna do what I'm doing. I know because I talked to
31:37
everybody every day, and everybody lying about something. I don't lie. How
31:42
about it? She didn't have nothing to say. She said that, she
31:49
didn't have nothing to say. That the first step. That's the first step.
31:55
If you ask me to bounce and back stop lying. She said it.
32:00
She said it, and she said it on this show. Right here.
32:02
She said it, she said it all right here. I don't even
32:07
know where to go. You want to be free. You got to tell
32:08
the truth. We know everything. You got, say it out your mouth.
32:20
I'm on coach. I want to be off. Not many people will
32:25
do that, Not many people, it's at that level. But and I
32:30
am so proud of you for doing it, everybody. I just I just
32:36
met her tonight, but it was as if i'd been knowing her, you
32:38
know, with just what she's saying. And it is so true. It
32:43
is so true to be on the other side when I say it, because
32:46
I'm listening. I'm listening again, and I've been listening for I don't want
32:52
to say how long because that'll tell my age, but I've been listening for
32:54
a while. I've been listening for a while. And every time I speak
33:00
to someone who's come clean, not with just confession, who has come clean,
33:06
who's cleansed. Of course, everybody's story is different, but I'm just
33:09
always in awe of their journey. It's just unbelievable. It's just it's not
33:16
more. It's not easy. How about this? How about this? Every
33:22
single day I think about using. I tell myself no, every day,
33:28
why that was my friend m who liked the breakup with with a good friend?
33:35
Who liked the breakup with a good friend? Nobody. I can literally
33:38
take all of my problems that I got today because I got them and snort
33:44
them up. And I wouldn't be thinking about nothing because when I was high,
33:47
I guess what I was not. The molestation didn't matter, these abusive
33:52
men, none of that mattered. None of that mattered. I was not
33:55
myself. But when you come down, you are yourself all the way plus
34:02
all the other. So the drug it doesn't help. It just doesn't.
34:07
It just doesn't help, even though it feels good. The sex with it
34:12
is amazing. I mean I can't. I cleaned up everything, like the
34:19
energy, the I had two jobs. Like literally, that drug is chosen
34:23
because of what it does, not because of the outcome. Because of what
34:30
it does. It's no different. It's no different than people eating sugar.
34:37
Sugar is just as addictive. That sugar is more addictive than cocaine. Did
34:45
you know that? See now, I'm not gonna answer that because every time
34:49
I go to McDonald's, I always ask for my tea with ten sugars.
34:57
McDonald's. You can ask them to put liquisure. I ain't gonna go through
35:02
all of that. You can ask them for liquid sugar, but I always
35:05
ask them for ten sugars to put it there. So, yes, you're
35:07
right, it is addicted because God. Go to God and tell him I
35:12
want to be off this teeth. Let's after this weekend, because this weekend
35:24
I'm not conproming I might try that, but it is, it's holly,
35:30
and it is because when they tell me, when I'm in the drive through
35:35
and they tell me they don't have any, I pull right off and I
35:37
get mad to I'm upset because I used to get mad, starting to get
35:42
it, getting upset because they don't have what I want. So to relate
35:45
it to what you're saying, yeah, I used to get mad at the
35:49
dope man when he didn't have my dope too, or if it was bad
35:52
dope. Yeah, so I get it. The addiction, same thing,
35:55
but nobody wants to look at it like that because the drug added is low.
36:00
That's what people think. But baby, I'm sorry, I ain't been
36:05
there. I'm sorry. I'm never gonna put myself low. Liars. I
36:08
hate a lie liars. Well, you know what. I have two things
36:13
to say to you. One of them is ted X where you need to
36:17
be speaking on stage, and the other one is get in touch with Treviva
36:22
Harris to write that book because I give you, I can give you her
36:29
information because she's amazing. So I'm gonna definitely give you her for information in
36:34
here. You definitely need to get in touch with her to get that book.
36:38
And then I give you somebody that can review your book. So I
36:40
got you right there. I definitely not a problem. I'll put you in
36:49
my mentions, our visionary and the parent Healer. Now when you say parent
36:59
healer, I been parenting twelve children, so I know that I have to
37:01
get in touch with you. You're specializing in parenting and emotional distress. I'm
37:07
going to need to speak with you after the show too. You're the founder
37:12
and CEO of TNT Legacy LLC. Now I know what the first T stands
37:17
for, Taysha. What does the other T stand for? Well, the
37:22
first he actually stands for TJ, which is my husband's name. And I
37:25
bring up the second tea So nice, nice, you're partner partnering with your
37:32
husband with the focus on the importance of healthy relationships and restoration of community and
37:38
family services. How can solitude and introspections help our youth and families remain grounded
37:45
and centered during turbulent periods and emotional periods of emotional heaviness. So for starters,
37:57
I'm going to say is easily done when the parent gets to the point
38:01
and be okay with saying fing kids and say it with it meaning, and
38:10
that EFSTT is for foundation, freedom and focus, because once we set a
38:16
foundation in the family, that foundation is love, respect, and whatever values
38:23
and things of that nature that's dear to you. You set those from the
38:28
beginning. I'm talking about when there are two and three, when they start
38:30
to cussing and all that stuff and we laughing and think it's funny. Yeah,
38:35
we gotta stop them right there. We gotta go ahead and set that
38:37
foundation. We gotta go ahead and set that schedule so they can understand the
38:43
importance of structure. So with that then we build, because think about it,
38:49
with the house, you can't we can't be up from the roof down.
38:52
We have to go foundation up. So when we have a solid foundation,
38:57
we can build on top of that thing. So in order to keep
39:00
building, we have to be free as parents, because if we're not free,
39:06
all of our baggage, all of that hurts, all of our depressions,
39:09
our woes, our molestations, our abuse, our heartbreaks. Okay,
39:15
he left you, he ain't want to be with you. Now you're single,
39:16
mama and you're taking it out on your kids, or no, she
39:20
didn't want you. Now you you don't want to pay child support, you
39:23
don't want to do anything for your kids. Well, my mam and them
39:27
did this to me, so on repeating that same cycle. Once we've become
39:31
free from all of that, then we're able to stand up and focus on
39:37
ourselves as individuals. We have to get ourself right. We have to heal
39:42
with then, because what's happening is we are bleeding and it's falling on our
39:47
kids. So when that happens, there's no peace in the house. That
39:52
can't be any peace if mama's going through it, Daddy going through it,
39:57
or God forbid. As a single parent household, they're going through their own
40:00
woes. The kids at school trying to figure out, you know, hope
40:05
I go home today and Mama don't have an attitude, or I hope mom
40:07
and dad ain't fussing today. They don'e have a bad day at school and
40:10
they come home trying to talk to Mama about it or dad about it,
40:14
and they're getting fussed at. So it's like how it's chaos after chaos.
40:22
So with those three el's we're able to have that peace in the home,
40:28
and with that peace and with that love, we can sit down and have
40:30
a conversation after school. Hey, baby, how was your dad's school?
40:34
Well? Such and such, she is such and such. Let me just
40:37
tell you I know all the tea that happens at Central High School in Phoenix
40:39
City because my baby gives it to me. I'm talking about. I know
40:44
everything and what she don't know when she find out how to after prins.
40:47
Ooh, mama, let me tell you why. Because my child and now
40:52
have a friendship. And that's what a lot of people, a lot of
40:54
parents. Oh y'all don't need to be our child friends. But I have
40:59
a question. You your child first friend. So if you didn't show them
41:05
how to be a friend, how do we expect them to go out and
41:08
be a friendships with other people? Now? Now, now, now,
41:13
I'll do you know, well, I can't be around a whole bunch of
41:15
girls. I can't do them, and I can't do that. That's because
41:19
you and your mama don't get along. That's because you can't have a conversation
41:22
with your mama. And I know I'm a country girl from Pinsview, Alabama,
41:25
I know for I know what it feels like when something happens and my
41:30
mama call all my aunt tis. Like Dane says, now, you ain't
41:35
had to tell them that part. But growing up we couldn't. We couldn't
41:37
really say that. But it's like now having that conversation, we have those
41:44
boundaries. So all of that comes with that that silid foundation. Communicate.
41:52
Can you describe the path to I'm sorry, can you describe the path to
41:55
hope and healing? Of course? So with hope there's this thing it's called
42:05
faith, and with faith comes confidence. So if I am hopeful that something
42:12
is going to happen, I'm putting my hope in that thing. I hope
42:15
this happened, but even if it don't, I'm not going to fall out
42:20
with God because it didn't happen. Now, I still got faith that something
42:24
is happening. So I'm gonna hold on to this hope because I know there's
42:29
a healing gonna take place. I know there's a breakthrough. It's gonna take
42:32
place because I already believe it, and I got that confidence to go with
42:37
my faith, because yes, faith is the key part, but that subt
42:43
part is confidence that faith is knowing, you know, hey, that God
42:46
is going to do it, but that confidence is saying he will do it.
42:51
I know what he can do. I've seen him do it for others.
42:54
That's my faith, that's my faith. Hope. Now, I got
42:57
to put some confidence with that thing. And when I put some confidence with
43:00
that thing, I know that God will So I know God will hear my
43:05
household. I know my family is gonna be good, especially when you blending
43:08
family's baby. That is not a micro wave type ordeal, that is a
43:12
crop type pressure cooker. I had to learn that to go ahead. Sometimes
43:21
we get in the way of keeping up with maintaining our well being. What
43:23
suggestions would you have for someone to prevent them from falling back into old habits.
43:31
Take time for yourself, like you have to take time for yourself.
43:37
That's where that focus come in at got we gotta get back to know what
43:40
makes us happen. Who are we outside of being mommy and daddy? Who
43:45
are we outside of all these titles. Yes I have these titles, but
43:49
baby, they mean nothing. My My favorite title is being God's favorite one.
43:55
So knowing that, knowing that everything that comes with it, I'm able
44:00
to say, Okay, I know what I like, I know what makes
44:04
me happy. So I'm gonna take some time. I'm gonna take some me
44:07
time, and I'm gonna get right real quick now. Baby. I ain't
44:09
with it today. I'm not in the best of moods being able to verbalize
44:14
and communicate how I feel to those who So how can we facilitate a growth
44:20
mindset to enhance our motivation? But start hanging around like minded people always say
44:28
that, yeah, and it first has to start here and it goes up
44:31
here to our mindset, because when our mindset is together, then we know
44:37
what dang. I can't keep hanging with them because they keep doing the same
44:39
thing. I want something different and not feeling bad for wanting more, not
44:45
feeling bad for not want to continue to be in the same cycle. So
44:52
what are some of the most mindset What are some of the most effective strategies
44:57
that you would suggest to someone who is struggling to bound back to their initial
45:00
state of mind. It's like they fell off, you know, they were
45:04
on the path of doing one thing and then they fell off. And it
45:07
doesn't have to be because of substances or anything like that. For just some
45:10
reason some people could be mental health. Some people just check out that I
45:16
did too. I just I just had to come to Jesus moment the other
45:20
day and I was like, God, I'm at a plateau. I feel
45:22
stuck. Where do I go? How do That's what I'm saying. When
45:27
people get stuck, they don't know where to go. They're just standing still
45:31
and life is just going on around him, standing in the middle, and
45:36
it's just going all around them. So it becomes an issue for so many.
45:40
So from a spiritual standpoint, you got to give it to God and
45:45
you have to let him know. You have to confess that thing. You
45:49
gotta let you know. Even though he already knows, he loves to hear
45:52
it from us. So once you let him know. Like I said,
45:54
this is from a spiritual standpoint, but from a practical standpoint is once you
46:00
identify that issue, like dang, this is happening. Now it's time to
46:05
write it out. Let's go ahead and make some steps. Let's be intentional.
46:08
So now I'm going to connect with someone who can hold me accountable to
46:14
get out of this stuck place. So again, surrounding yourself with like minded
46:19
people. But what I'm hearing tonight. I want to I want you to
46:22
be able to tell us how can we how can you in people that's listening
46:27
and watching, encourage more women and men to join bounce Back. MM So
46:35
the bounce back starts with you, because we got to keep in mind we're
46:37
still gonna bounce every time something happened. We got to bounce back from it
46:42
because we are resilient and resilience it's really to bounce back from that thing that
46:47
could have broken you. So identify what that thing is, figure out how
46:55
we're how can I get through this what's stopping me from overcome? Don't push
47:00
it to the side. We've done enough of it. We've done enough of
47:04
putting it to the back of our head and pushing it to the side.
47:07
We gotta face that thing head on. We gotta face that obstacle and we
47:09
gotta deal with it so many times suppress it. You heard it tonight he
47:15
had the Bounce Back Project. These women drop some nuggets. There are tools,
47:20
they are easy to use and they can make a difference. And I
47:23
thank you all for joining us tonight. Contact Slanda, Krystal or Tayisha to
47:30
learn more about how to implement their practices within your team or your office.
47:36
You can also find them on Facebook and Twitter for the latest tools, resources
47:40
and events. You could look them up on Facebook. Even in our darkest
47:46
moments and hardest struggles, we are never beyond God's redemption. Join us.
47:52
On Friday February sixteenth, my guest April Kolfield Lambert shares her journey from crack
48:00
to Christ after eight after Dark. I will be there for that. Yeah,
48:07
I love him, I love Get your tickets. Please get up to
48:14
do Darling Podcast show with your host, Black Diamond