Latest / The Uplifters / Could You Travel Solo Full-Time?

Transcript

Could You Travel Solo Full-Time? · The Uplifters

0:00
[music]
0:05
SPEAKER_01: Hey, Uplifters, you know how much I love experimenting and trying new things.
0:09
SPEAKER_01: It's how I build courage capital every day by testing and learning
0:13
SPEAKER_01: and discovering what really works for me.
0:16
SPEAKER_01: That's why I'm so excited to introduce you to Join the Tryb.
0:21
SPEAKER_01: The founder is a total uplifter who lovingly curates products from emerging founders
0:27
SPEAKER_01: with seriously inspiring stories.
0:30
SPEAKER_01: I've tried so many of the Join the Tryb products at this point,
0:33
SPEAKER_01: and I've discovered so many favorites.
0:36
SPEAKER_01: What I love most of all is that more than half of the products on the Join
0:40
SPEAKER_01: the Tribe website support a woman who's building something meaningful.
0:46
SPEAKER_01: It's really like getting to be a part of someone's uplifting journey while discovering growth.
0:51
SPEAKER_01: Check out Join the Tryb and use code UPLIFTER20 for 20% off the website for your first order.
0:55
SPEAKER_01: It's jointhetryb.com, T-R-Y-B.com.
1:20
SPEAKER_01: Welcome to The Uplifters podcast.
1:22
SPEAKER_01: I'm Aransas Savas,
1:23
SPEAKER_01: your host,
1:24
SPEAKER_01: and I've spent the last 20 years at the intersection of behavior change research
1:28
SPEAKER_01: and coaching.
1:30
SPEAKER_01: And every week here on this show,
1:31
SPEAKER_01: I get to talk to an amazing,
1:33
SPEAKER_01: inspiring woman who's out in the world doing big,
1:36
SPEAKER_01: brave things with the second half of her life.
1:38
SPEAKER_01: Today is certainly no exception to that.
1:41
SPEAKER_01: And in some ways, it is the purest form of it.
1:44
SPEAKER_01: Christy Halverson is the author of the book,
1:47
SPEAKER_01: Perfect Unfolding,
1:48
SPEAKER_01: Seven Years of Life-Changing Solo Adventure and A Year That Broke Me Open.
1:54
SPEAKER_01: This book is honestly,
1:57
SPEAKER_01: without question,
1:57
SPEAKER_01: one of my favorite books I have read in a really, really long time.
2:02
SPEAKER_01: Its name is so apt and through this story, yeah,
2:08
SPEAKER_01: you'll get to learn about Christy's journey of leaving her firefighting career,
2:13
SPEAKER_01: which she worked really freaking hard to create,
2:16
SPEAKER_01: selling everything she owned,
2:17
SPEAKER_01: leaving her family behind and hitting the road in her Airstream trailer.
2:22
SPEAKER_01: But more than that,
2:23
SPEAKER_01: you'll get to hear directly from Christy,
2:26
SPEAKER_01: who is, I think, at her essence, a philosopher and a poet.
2:32
SPEAKER_01: Her writing is extraordinary.
2:33
SPEAKER_01: I'm going to do my best not to tell you much about the book today
2:37
SPEAKER_01: because I don't want to spoil it for you because she takes you on such a ride.
2:41
SPEAKER_01: And frankly,
2:43
SPEAKER_01: I was so happy that I went into it knowing nothing that I want to give you
2:48
SPEAKER_01: the chance to experience it as well.
2:50
SPEAKER_01: But what I do want you to hear directly from Christy is a little
2:53
SPEAKER_01: about her philosophy about what it really means to live.
2:56
SPEAKER_01: And love and how we hold loosely and embrace surprise and disruption
3:03
SPEAKER_01: and what it means to accept and embrace fear as a part of our journey
3:09
SPEAKER_01: and move forward anyway while listening to our inner knowing.
3:14
SPEAKER_01: So Christy, thank you so much for writing this book.
3:19
SPEAKER_01: I'm excited to talk to you,
3:20
SPEAKER_01: but frankly,
3:21
SPEAKER_01: like I can't imagine anything is going to be purer than the experience
3:26
SPEAKER_01: of hanging out with you for 10 or 12 hours while listening to your book
3:30
SPEAKER_01: and hearing your words and your journey and your philosophies in my ear.
3:34
SPEAKER_01: So really, really thrilled to have this time with you.
3:37
SPEAKER_00: Well, thank you so much.
3:38
SPEAKER_00: And I can't wait to see where we go now.
3:41
SPEAKER_00: I know.
3:42
SPEAKER_01: Me too.
3:43
SPEAKER_01: And I purposely didn't prepare for this interview.
3:47
SPEAKER_01: I wrote down like 10 words about my responses to...
3:52
SPEAKER_01: I like to make plans.
3:53
SPEAKER_01: I like to have ideas and dreams.
3:55
SPEAKER_01: And when they don't go as I expect, and
4:22
SPEAKER_00: They often don't for all
4:23
SPEAKER_01: of us.
4:25
SPEAKER_01: I say to myself, so this is the adventure I was meant to have.
4:30
SPEAKER_01: And I've told my kids about it,
4:32
SPEAKER_01: my husband,
4:33
SPEAKER_01: my mother,
4:33
SPEAKER_01: my friends,
4:35
SPEAKER_01: because I just think it's like a fundamentally different way of living and seeing
4:40
SPEAKER_01: the adventure of life than most of us get to experience.
4:43
SPEAKER_01: And so that is how I wanted to approach this time with you and Kati
4:47
SPEAKER_01: and everybody here on the show.
4:48
SPEAKER_01: If you watch this on YouTube,
4:49
SPEAKER_01: you will get to meet Kati too,
4:51
SPEAKER_01: because Christy is sitting in her home and That moves with her on every adventure
4:58
SPEAKER_01: and her name is Cotty.
4:59
SPEAKER_01: So maybe we start by just introducing Cotty to the audience.
5:04
SPEAKER_00: Yes, yes, we can.
5:06
SPEAKER_00: And just to go back to what you were just talking about,
5:08
SPEAKER_00: this is the adventure that's happening today.
5:11
SPEAKER_00: You know,
5:11
SPEAKER_00: there's two of my favorite things to say when things just don't turn out
5:16
SPEAKER_00: as we'd hoped.
5:17
SPEAKER_00: And that is, so this is what's happening today.
5:20
SPEAKER_00: So thank you for picking that out of everything that was in that book,
5:24
SPEAKER_00: because that's a special space right there to be in and live in.
5:28
SPEAKER_00: So speaking of spaces to live in, I live in an Airstream.
5:33
SPEAKER_00: She's 25 years old.
5:35
SPEAKER_00: And I love,
5:36
SPEAKER_00: I almost think one of the favorite parts of this book for most readers is getting
5:41
SPEAKER_00: to know Cotty.
5:42
SPEAKER_00: By a few pages in, it feels like Cotty is your friend.
5:47
SPEAKER_00: And I've had so many people say, you speak about your Airstream like she is a living being.
5:52
SPEAKER_00: And I love it because she is.
5:55
SPEAKER_00: So yes, so Cati is a 28 foot Airstream.
5:58
SPEAKER_00: She's been redone on the inside and she's had some,
6:01
SPEAKER_00: you know, nips and tucks on the outside, just like any girl might have.
6:05
SPEAKER_00: But she's been rolling down the road full time with me for almost nine years.
6:12
SPEAKER_00: And she was a full time home for some friends of mine for three and a half years before that.
6:17
SPEAKER_00: So Cotty's been full-timing for close to 13 years now.
6:21
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
6:21
SPEAKER_00: And she has everything you need, everything that's in a house, just small.
6:25
SPEAKER_00: I say she's a tiny New York apartment, 200 square feet of everything anyone would need.
6:31
SPEAKER_00: I love that response.
6:33
SPEAKER_00: I mean, you know, for some people, I think so.
6:36
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
6:36
SPEAKER_01: Folks who are living in the converted tenements, for sure.
6:39
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
6:40
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
6:40
SPEAKER_01: It's remarkable how little space we really need.
6:43
SPEAKER_00: And yet one of the themes that comes through over and over
6:46
SPEAKER_01: in your book is how mismatched our true needs and our expectations
6:54
SPEAKER_01: of what we need are.
6:56
SPEAKER_01: And as much as I heard this book as a book of life lessons and...
7:04
SPEAKER_01: And it is,
7:04
SPEAKER_01: it's also packed with so much really fun,
7:09
SPEAKER_01: juicy information about your unconventional life.
7:15
SPEAKER_01: And so for anybody listening to this, Pick it up for either reason.
7:20
SPEAKER_01: If you just want to know how to live on the road and you have that dream calling
7:24
SPEAKER_01: to you, you're going to find so much great insight.
7:28
SPEAKER_01: You've lived on the road for nine years now.
7:30
SPEAKER_01: Take folks back to the beginning of your journey.
7:34
SPEAKER_01: You were in a male-dominated field as a woman.
7:36
SPEAKER_00: I had this dream with my boyfriend at the time to hit the road and travel full-time.
7:43
SPEAKER_00: And that came from a blessing in disguise.
7:45
SPEAKER_00: I got really sick from an exposure at the fire department and then was just healing from that.
7:49
SPEAKER_00: It was like a two-year healing journey.
7:51
SPEAKER_00: And then I tore my ACL in my knee and just really mangled my knee horrendously.
7:58
SPEAKER_00: And that knee injury after being sick for almost three years was just the straw
8:03
SPEAKER_00: that broke the camel's back.
8:04
SPEAKER_00: And I was in my mid-30s and I just said, I don't know if I'm going to make it to retirement.
8:08
SPEAKER_00: And if I do make it, I don't know what kind of shape I'm going to be in.
8:11
SPEAKER_00: So why not?
8:12
SPEAKER_00: I live my dream now.
8:13
SPEAKER_00: And my dream was to travel.
8:16
SPEAKER_00: So yeah, I was 35 when I decided it was time to make a massive change.
8:21
SPEAKER_00: And then it was two and a half years later when the change actually happened.
8:25
SPEAKER_00: And I lived in a regular,
8:26
SPEAKER_00: you know,
8:27
SPEAKER_00: Three bedroom, two bath house with a nice yard and, you know, did normal stuff.
8:32
SPEAKER_00: And I'd actually never owned an RV before.
8:35
SPEAKER_00: And so got a tester.
8:37
SPEAKER_00: I got a little 16 foot Casita to see what it was like to have one.
8:41
SPEAKER_00: And we liked it.
8:42
SPEAKER_00: So we realized Airstream was the way we wanted to go.
8:45
SPEAKER_00: And so we found one.
8:47
SPEAKER_00: And then Jim and I broke up.
8:49
SPEAKER_00: He made an oopsie and decided to visit an ex.
8:52
SPEAKER_00: And she just happened to live 24 hours driving away.
8:55
SPEAKER_00: And he didn't tell me.
8:57
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, no, he ended up coming back and wanting to get back together.
9:00
SPEAKER_00: And I said, no, thanks.
9:02
SPEAKER_00: And the book actually begins with a scene where...
9:05
SPEAKER_00: I was so sad.
9:06
SPEAKER_00: I mean, I loved him and I thought we were a forever thing.
9:09
SPEAKER_00: But the sadness and grief I was feeling just didn't feel like it matched the situation.
9:15
SPEAKER_00: And it had been a month since we broke up and I had called my mom.
9:18
SPEAKER_00: And I was just like, what is going on?
9:20
SPEAKER_00: Can you help me stop crying?
9:22
SPEAKER_00: And she lovingly slapped me in a really sweet way.
9:26
SPEAKER_00: She said, he's gone.
9:28
SPEAKER_00: But I think what's happening right now is, yeah, you miss him.
9:31
SPEAKER_00: But you think he stole your dream.
9:34
SPEAKER_00: Like you think you can't do this alone.
9:36
SPEAKER_00: And I didn't know that I was thinking that, but I was.
9:41
SPEAKER_00: And so at that moment, that was in mid-September of 17, it was just like, she's right.
9:47
SPEAKER_00: And then that day started this very quick transition.
9:52
SPEAKER_00: And within two months, I was on the road.
9:54
SPEAKER_00: Sold my house, left my job, got rid of all my stuff and hit it.
9:58
SPEAKER_00: I hit the road, I think it was a week or two before
10:01
SPEAKER_01: my 39th birthday.
10:02
SPEAKER_01: If you can imagine yourself in 2015, 2016,
10:09
SPEAKER_01: do you think you knew that you were the kind of girl who could pack up,
10:14
SPEAKER_01: leave everything and hit the road on her own?
10:16
SPEAKER_01: No.
10:18
SPEAKER_00: And the thing was, in my mind, I had an idea of what traveling on the road looked like.
10:24
SPEAKER_00: And that was campgrounds and RV resorts and national parks and things.
10:29
SPEAKER_00: And I found out early on I didn't like it, but I didn't know what I did like.
10:33
SPEAKER_00: But it took me about a year to figure out that I needed to go fully off grid.
10:37
SPEAKER_00: So stack Scotty's roof with solar panels, have the composting toilet and just...
10:43
SPEAKER_00: Find ways that I could live without anything but filling up with water every three weeks.
10:49
SPEAKER_00: And once I figured that out, everything changed.
10:53
SPEAKER_00: It went from the first year was kind of really hard.
10:55
SPEAKER_00: And I thought I made a mistake.
10:56
SPEAKER_00: I wanted to quit.
10:58
SPEAKER_00: Thankfully,
10:58
SPEAKER_00: I stuck with it because once I hit my stride and started living off grid,
11:02
SPEAKER_00: deep in the forest, deep in the desert by myself, which is nature...
11:06
SPEAKER_00: That changed everything.
11:07
SPEAKER_00: So yeah,
11:07
SPEAKER_00: the Christie in 2015 and 16
11:09
SPEAKER_00: that was planning this never could have imagined I would do it alone.
11:13
SPEAKER_00: Never could have imagined the modern day walkabout that I went
11:18
SPEAKER_00: and never could have imagined the person I'd become through the journey.
11:23
SPEAKER_01: I think that's a really comforting answer because you talk a lot
11:29
SPEAKER_01: about these whispers of your heart and this inner knowing.
11:33
SPEAKER_01: And so I want to talk more about that.
11:36
SPEAKER_01: So many people have that urge to do something new,
11:41
SPEAKER_01: whether it's to live off-grid in an Airstream or otherwise.
11:47
SPEAKER_01: And yet we have these ideas about, am I the person who can do this?
11:51
SPEAKER_01: Other people could do it, but not me.
11:54
SPEAKER_01: And so I think to hear somebody like you who's done it say...
11:57
SPEAKER_01: I didn't know that, number one.
11:59
SPEAKER_01: And the way I first did it wasn't the perfect way for me to do it,
12:03
SPEAKER_01: of course, because you didn't know.
12:06
SPEAKER_01: You couldn't know your preferences.
12:09
SPEAKER_01: And yet you stuck with it to discover them.
12:11
SPEAKER_01: And so much of what blocks us, I think, is binary thinking.
12:14
SPEAKER_01: Like, I'm able, I'm not able.
12:17
SPEAKER_01: Or there is the campground version, and I don't like the campground version.
12:22
SPEAKER_01: But to keep asking these questions the way you did provide such a beautiful model
12:25
SPEAKER_01: for us of like, Well, what did you like about it?
12:28
SPEAKER_01: What did you want more of, Christy?
12:30
SPEAKER_01: What did you want less of, Christy?
12:33
SPEAKER_01: And then that self-discovery.
12:36
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
12:36
SPEAKER_00: And I feel like one of the biggest takeaways I have from this long ass journey,
12:43
SPEAKER_00: I don't know what to call it anymore, because it feels like more than a journey.
12:47
SPEAKER_00: I mean, we're, you know, it's a lifestyle.
12:49
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
12:51
SPEAKER_00: What I've learned from just falling into this completely off the beaten path way
12:56
SPEAKER_00: of living is we don't have to know how to do things.
13:00
SPEAKER_00: We don't have to have it all figured out.
13:02
SPEAKER_00: Because if I had to have it all figured out,
13:05
SPEAKER_00: like the way I live now and the way I've been living since pretty much 2018
13:09
SPEAKER_00: and 19 was a transition where I went fully off grid.
13:12
SPEAKER_00: If I had to know how to do all that, I would never have left because it's a lot to learn.
13:17
SPEAKER_00: And like this book, so a lot of people have read Wild by Cheryl Strayed.
13:21
SPEAKER_00: And I like to compare my book to hers.
13:23
SPEAKER_00: It's different, but it's similar in that most people aren't into hiking.
13:27
SPEAKER_00: They're just not.
13:28
SPEAKER_00: They're into other things.
13:29
SPEAKER_00: But you don't have to be into hiking to just get something huge from that book Wild.
13:34
SPEAKER_00: And it's the same thing with my book.
13:35
SPEAKER_00: If you're into traveling and you're into RVing, great.
13:38
SPEAKER_00: You'll have a little bonus.
13:39
SPEAKER_00: You'll learn about that.
13:39
SPEAKER_00: But you actually could...
13:41
SPEAKER_00: I don't care less about this because it's the philosophies,
13:44
SPEAKER_00: it's the learnings, it's the life lessons.
13:47
SPEAKER_00: And it's not, it's not, oh, Christy learned this.
13:49
SPEAKER_00: I tried to write it in a way so that you could have that same learning aha life lesson.
13:54
SPEAKER_00: And that to me is the biggest one is you only need to trust and not even trust
14:01
SPEAKER_00: in yourself because sometimes it's hard to trust in ourself.
14:03
SPEAKER_00: You're like, how can I trust in myself?
14:04
SPEAKER_00: I don't know what the heck I'm up to.
14:06
SPEAKER_00: It's trusting in something that You know, indescribable.
14:10
SPEAKER_00: I like to call it life with a capital L.
14:13
SPEAKER_00: But whatever you want to call that,
14:14
SPEAKER_00: it's just trusting that we're a part of this grand unfolding and here to learn.
14:20
SPEAKER_00: And sometimes learning is about ourselves.
14:23
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes learning is about how life works.
14:25
SPEAKER_00: And sometimes learning is how to fix an airstream.
14:28
SPEAKER_01: And it's giving yourself space to learn instead of expecting yourself
14:34
SPEAKER_01: to know everything that you couldn't possibly have learned yet.
14:38
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, exactly.
14:39
SPEAKER_00: And then be open to just continually learning.
14:42
SPEAKER_00: You know, I'm still on the road and I'm still learning stuff.
14:45
SPEAKER_00: And part of it's learning how to deal with people,
14:47
SPEAKER_00: you know,
14:47
SPEAKER_00: like learning how to deal when you drop your your home off at a mechanic,
14:52
SPEAKER_00: like learning how to share exactly what you want done,
14:55
SPEAKER_00: you know,
14:56
SPEAKER_00: because if you don't communicate well, things might not happen as you wish.
14:59
SPEAKER_00: And that applies to every human on the planet.
15:02
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
15:02
SPEAKER_01: And we forget, right, that Like we know ourselves better than anyone else.
15:06
SPEAKER_01: You know Cotty better than any mechanic ever could,
15:09
SPEAKER_01: even though they're really good at mechanicing.
15:11
SPEAKER_01: Right.
15:12
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
15:13
SPEAKER_01: You're really good at Cotty.
15:14
SPEAKER_01: We have to talk for a second about Cotty's name since we're going to keep saying her name.
15:18
SPEAKER_00: So Cottywumple is a made-up word.
15:20
SPEAKER_00: I tried to find the origin.
15:21
SPEAKER_00: It came somewhere from the UK a few decades ago.
15:24
SPEAKER_00: But other than that, nobody knows.
15:26
SPEAKER_00: And it was loosely defined as traveling without knowing where you're going.
15:30
SPEAKER_00: And I saw that word in 2016 and it was just...
15:33
SPEAKER_00: I never had this happen, but I was like, this is my word.
15:36
SPEAKER_00: This is how I'm going to live.
15:38
SPEAKER_00: And this is the name of my future Airstream.
15:40
SPEAKER_00: So...
15:41
SPEAKER_00: Wade and I had just started looking at Airstreams and weren't even ready
15:45
SPEAKER_00: to even consider buying one.
15:47
SPEAKER_00: And I saw this word and I said, Cottywample, that's what our Airstreams name is.
15:52
SPEAKER_00: And it wasn't like we're going to name our future Airstream that I said,
15:55
SPEAKER_00: Cottywample is out there somewhere.
15:58
SPEAKER_00: We just have to find her.
15:59
SPEAKER_00: She's waiting for us.
16:01
SPEAKER_00: And so every time I saw an Airstream after that, I kind of got curious.
16:05
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, is that you, Cotty Wumpel?
16:08
SPEAKER_00: And sometimes we'd look at a used Airstream and I'd know right away, this is not Cotty Wumpel.
16:13
SPEAKER_00: But anyways, that's how I named her a long time before we actually found her.
16:17
SPEAKER_00: And then one time there was just an Airstream and I knew that was her.
16:20
SPEAKER_00: And I said, here she is.
16:21
SPEAKER_00: This is Cotty Wumpel.
16:22
SPEAKER_00: And it's kind of like if you have a really long name, your mom eventually is like, no, honey.
16:28
SPEAKER_00: So I only call her Cotty Womble when she's in trouble.
16:30
SPEAKER_00: But other than that, her name's just Cotty.
16:32
SPEAKER_00: Just Cotty.
16:33
SPEAKER_01: It's such a great philosophy too.
16:35
SPEAKER_01: And so encompassing of everything we learn about you and from you in the book.
16:41
SPEAKER_01: And it really does go back to trust, that word that you keep using.
16:45
SPEAKER_01: And you talk about trust in yourself and so much of This is
16:51
SPEAKER_01: about trusting your own inner voice,
16:53
SPEAKER_01: trusting yourself to keep you safe, trusting your ability to take care of yourself.
17:00
SPEAKER_01: And I would say that it is just as much about trusting others and trusting in
17:05
SPEAKER_01: the universe and trusting that other humans are mostly great.
17:09
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
17:10
SPEAKER_00: And that's a big part of it is,
17:12
SPEAKER_00: you know,
17:13
SPEAKER_00: one of the biggest questions I get,
17:14
SPEAKER_00: especially from females, is you are out there by yourself, alone.
17:20
SPEAKER_00: And people are like, do you carry a gun?
17:21
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, no, I don't.
17:22
SPEAKER_00: I go to Canada every summer and you just can't bring guns to Canada.
17:28
SPEAKER_00: And even if I could, it just doesn't make sense.
17:31
SPEAKER_00: So I don't.
17:32
SPEAKER_00: I don't have weapons.
17:34
SPEAKER_00: I say my only weapon is love.
17:36
SPEAKER_00: I've actually never said that,
17:37
SPEAKER_00: but right when we were talking, I was thinking that it's not a weapon.
17:41
SPEAKER_00: It's just when I'm in a space of peace and contentment and love,
17:46
SPEAKER_00: yeah, like I've never been threatened.
17:48
SPEAKER_00: I've never been robbed.
17:49
SPEAKER_00: I've never been anything since I've been on this journey.
17:52
SPEAKER_00: And I've been way out in the middle, like who knows where by myself.
17:57
SPEAKER_00: And my theory is when I'm in this space,
18:00
SPEAKER_00: which I am most of the time,
18:01
SPEAKER_00: which is pure contentment, my theory is it's like a really good cold.
18:08
SPEAKER_00: People can catch it.
18:10
SPEAKER_00: And even if somebody was thinking of robbing or threatening me,
18:13
SPEAKER_00: like eventually they're like, no, I'll find somewhere else.
18:15
SPEAKER_00: They might even not know why, but they just changed their mind, you know?
18:18
SPEAKER_00: And I don't know if that's true.
18:19
SPEAKER_00: I have no way of proving it, but it just feels like it, you know?
18:22
SPEAKER_00: And, you know, something I didn't mention about Cottywumple is...
18:27
SPEAKER_00: What I've defined it as, because to me, it's so much more than just about travel now.
18:32
SPEAKER_00: It's a way of being.
18:34
SPEAKER_00: And it just means to be open to limitless possibilities,
18:38
SPEAKER_00: to not try to predict our journey or predict the future,
18:41
SPEAKER_00: and to just travel with purpose,
18:45
SPEAKER_00: but with no expectations on where you're going or how you're going to get there.
18:48
SPEAKER_01: And when I mean travel, I mean... A perfect unfolding.
18:51
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
18:51
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
18:52
SPEAKER_00: Living life.
18:53
SPEAKER_00: I don't mean like getting an RV.
18:55
SPEAKER_00: I mean, traveling through this journey of life.
18:58
SPEAKER_00: What if you had no expectations?
18:59
SPEAKER_00: You didn't know where you were going and you only listened to the tickle
19:02
SPEAKER_00: of your soul at all times.
19:04
SPEAKER_00: Like what would be possible then?
19:07
SPEAKER_01: Right.
19:07
SPEAKER_01: You'd have to trust it.
19:09
SPEAKER_01: And I think that's the scariest part.
19:10
SPEAKER_01: People, we don't know our inner voice.
19:13
SPEAKER_01: We don't know that we can trust it.
19:15
SPEAKER_01: And you share again and again in the book ways that there are moments
19:20
SPEAKER_01: where you're like, I feel uneasy or I feel uncertain.
19:24
SPEAKER_01: And you're like, I'm going to listen to that and turn around.
19:28
SPEAKER_01: So we also can never prove how many times that has protected you.
19:33
SPEAKER_01: Because it is all working together as a matter of both trust in yourself and in others.
19:41
SPEAKER_01: How did you learn and how do you work as a coach now?
19:45
SPEAKER_01: Which is I think one of the questions probably people are asking like, how do you fund this?
19:50
SPEAKER_01: And so we should talk a little about that.
19:51
SPEAKER_01: But then I'm curious how you learn to listen to your own inner voice
19:55
SPEAKER_01: and how you teach your clients to do that.
19:57
SPEAKER_01: Because I imagine it's a big part of your work.
20:00
SPEAKER_00: It is.
20:00
SPEAKER_00: I mean, people come to me with all different sorts of issues.
20:05
SPEAKER_00: And I'm doing air quotes if you're not watching life issues and problems.
20:09
SPEAKER_00: And the way it seems to me is...
20:12
SPEAKER_00: You know,
20:12
SPEAKER_00: there's just what's happening and we can put labels on that and make it an issue or
20:16
SPEAKER_00: a problem or we can see it differently.
20:19
SPEAKER_00: And seeing and experiencing life differently changes everything.
20:23
SPEAKER_00: And so, you know,
20:24
SPEAKER_00: I began coaching in 2015 and I was a different coach because I was
20:29
SPEAKER_00: a different person.
20:30
SPEAKER_00: You know, I used to help people set goals and like, you know, do the classic.
20:35
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
20:35
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
20:53
SPEAKER_00: And so when I get to know people in a really deep way, I call it my ear twitches.
20:58
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, oh, my ear just twitched.
20:59
SPEAKER_00: I don't even say that to them.
21:00
SPEAKER_00: Because when I hear something that just doesn't sound true or sounds off,
21:04
SPEAKER_00: then I just get curious with them.
21:06
SPEAKER_00: And it's incredible,
21:08
SPEAKER_00: me included,
21:08
SPEAKER_00: how many things we have that feel like true truths,
21:12
SPEAKER_00: but they are actually just beliefs that are holding us back about ourselves,
21:15
SPEAKER_00: about life, about how things work.
21:18
SPEAKER_00: So that's the number one thing I do is I help people let go of All these beliefs,
21:22
SPEAKER_00: expectations, judgments, and labels that are just not helpful at all.
21:26
SPEAKER_00: And then to me,
21:28
SPEAKER_00: naturally what happens when we let go of all that,
21:31
SPEAKER_00: the only thing that's left is what's always there.
21:34
SPEAKER_00: And that is our inner wisdom, our inner knowing, the tickles of our soul.
21:38
SPEAKER_00: So we all have that ripe and ready.
21:41
SPEAKER_00: It's working all day long, every day.
21:44
SPEAKER_00: We listen to the tickles of our soul all day long, probably thousands of times a day.
21:48
SPEAKER_00: But there's these things that seem really big.
21:51
SPEAKER_00: Like taking a leap,
21:52
SPEAKER_00: changing a career,
21:53
SPEAKER_00: ending or beginning a relationship,
21:55
SPEAKER_00: deciding to have kids, moving, you name it, those kind of things.
22:00
SPEAKER_00: We don't listen.
22:01
SPEAKER_00: We listen to reason instead of the tickles.
22:04
SPEAKER_00: And so that's the biggest thing I do with people is help them realize that
22:08
SPEAKER_00: the tickles of our soul,
22:09
SPEAKER_00: our inner knowing takes the entire universe into consideration and you can trust it
22:13
SPEAKER_00: without any doubt at all.
22:15
SPEAKER_01: Yeah,
22:15
SPEAKER_01: there's been neuroscientific studies on the brain that look at the number of pieces
22:20
SPEAKER_01: of data That we analyze in any given moment.
22:24
SPEAKER_01: And it's like millions of pieces of data that we're considering in a light,
22:30
SPEAKER_01: unconscious manner that are informing our expectations, our beliefs of the moment.
22:36
SPEAKER_01: Does that make so much sense to me that you're saying like,
22:39
SPEAKER_01: let's weed through some of those so that you're not making incorrect assumptions
22:44
SPEAKER_01: about the data you're receiving on a patterned basis.
22:47
SPEAKER_01: And you can instead look at What's true for you now instead of what was true for you
22:55
SPEAKER_01: or others and other experiences.
22:58
SPEAKER_00: Right.
22:59
SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
23:00
SPEAKER_00: And that,
23:00
SPEAKER_00: you know,
23:01
SPEAKER_00: just because I've shared it already,
23:03
SPEAKER_00: I might just keep going back to my mom's big one on me.
23:07
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
23:08
SPEAKER_00: I would probably still be living in Southwest Florida being a firefighter
23:13
SPEAKER_00: if my mom had not Like just really, it took two seconds for her to just say it.
23:20
SPEAKER_00: And sometimes that's all we need.
23:21
SPEAKER_00: And we're like, oh my goodness, was I really thinking that?
23:26
SPEAKER_00: And I was wholeheartedly.
23:28
SPEAKER_00: I knew I couldn't do it by myself.
23:30
SPEAKER_00: But the moment that mistaken belief fell away, suddenly there was movement.
23:37
SPEAKER_00: I went from a grieving woman,
23:38
SPEAKER_00: like crawling across the kitchen floor in tears to like standing up and like,
23:43
SPEAKER_00: I need to clean this closet.
23:44
SPEAKER_00: I need to get, I need to put stuff for sale.
23:47
SPEAKER_00: I need to go to Goodwill.
23:49
SPEAKER_00: How do I sell my house?
23:50
SPEAKER_00: Like all that just happened as soon as that fell away.
23:52
SPEAKER_00: So all that was waiting to happen the whole time.
23:54
SPEAKER_00: It's just, I was in my own way about it.
23:57
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's interesting too.
23:58
SPEAKER_01: And like,
23:58
SPEAKER_01: I think part of what I'm taking from you here in that story,
24:01
SPEAKER_01: especially is We believe that our dreams are not accessible to us.
24:07
SPEAKER_01: So we act as if they are not accessible to us.
24:11
SPEAKER_01: And the second we can say, the only thing getting in my way is me.
24:16
SPEAKER_01: It's like all that pent up energy and desire is unleashed on the opportunity through action.
24:24
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
24:24
SPEAKER_00: And we can't help but act,
24:26
SPEAKER_00: you know,
24:27
SPEAKER_00: like that's another question a lot of people have is like,
24:29
SPEAKER_00: I want to do this, but I can't.
24:31
SPEAKER_00: It's not that you can't.
24:33
SPEAKER_00: Let's dig in here.
24:34
SPEAKER_00: Let's see what's going on behind the scenes.
24:36
SPEAKER_00: Because we all know the feeling of just getting in the flow where you just get stuff done.
24:43
SPEAKER_00: Because life isn't about getting stuff done.
24:45
SPEAKER_00: And we shouldn't have to rack our own knuckles to try to get stuff done.
24:49
SPEAKER_00: Things happen when we follow those tickles.
24:52
SPEAKER_00: And sometimes nothing is happening and that's the tickles too.
24:56
SPEAKER_00: And so it's trusting all of it.
24:58
SPEAKER_00: It's trusting all of it.
25:01
SPEAKER_00: My mom just passed in January.
25:03
SPEAKER_00: And she not only was one of the key players in the book throughout the whole book.
25:09
SPEAKER_00: Total hero in the book.
25:11
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
25:11
SPEAKER_00: She was a hero in the book.
25:12
SPEAKER_00: She was a hero in my life.
25:13
SPEAKER_00: But she passed just 30 hours before the book launched.
25:17
SPEAKER_00: And I had all these plans for the book.
25:20
SPEAKER_00: And I still was trying to do them.
25:22
SPEAKER_00: And I just couldn't.
25:23
SPEAKER_00: And I know there was a point where I talked to a close friend of mine
25:26
SPEAKER_00: and she was just like, you got to just rest.
25:29
SPEAKER_00: Mm-hmm.
25:30
SPEAKER_00: Now is not the time.
25:31
SPEAKER_00: Like, because I was like, I want to give this book wings.
25:33
SPEAKER_00: And she was just like,
25:35
SPEAKER_00: can you trust that it'll have its wings and there'll be a time
25:37
SPEAKER_00: when you can help it fly?
25:39
SPEAKER_00: Like, just relax.
25:40
SPEAKER_00: I know that's what your soul is being tickled to do now.
25:43
SPEAKER_00: You just don't think so.
25:44
SPEAKER_00: You think you need to do this stuff.
25:47
SPEAKER_00: And it was.
25:47
SPEAKER_00: I took several months and just grieved, you know?
25:51
SPEAKER_00: And so a lot of people don't realize that sometimes the best action is inaction.
25:58
SPEAKER_00: But the You know, universally, we know.
26:02
SPEAKER_00: We just don't listen.
26:03
SPEAKER_00: And here I am.
26:04
SPEAKER_00: I've been on this journey and have all these big ahas
26:06
SPEAKER_00: and I'm here admitting like I get in my own way too.
26:09
SPEAKER_00: It just happened.
26:10
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, absolutely.
26:12
SPEAKER_01: Because it's really deep patterning.
26:16
SPEAKER_01: And I think that's about trust too, right?
26:19
SPEAKER_01: At least for me,
26:20
SPEAKER_01: I find that whenever that happens,
26:22
SPEAKER_01: like we came back from such a micro version of it.
26:25
SPEAKER_01: We came back from vacation earlier this week.
26:27
SPEAKER_01: And there was just like this whole pile of house stuff and medical stuff and work stuff.
26:33
SPEAKER_01: And I felt so overwhelmed by it.
26:34
SPEAKER_01: And like the mantra I have to give myself in moments like that is,
26:38
SPEAKER_03: you will take care of what most needs taken care of.
26:43
SPEAKER_01: And because I think I have this like distrust in myself
26:47
SPEAKER_01: that I'm gonna like forget something that's important or I'm gonna neglect something
26:52
SPEAKER_01: that needs tending.
26:53
SPEAKER_01: And it's like, Honey, what evidence do you actually have?
26:58
SPEAKER_01: You were doing just fine, taking care, and you will be fine, right?
27:01
SPEAKER_01: But I think that it's the same thing as your story on just like a tiny,
27:05
SPEAKER_01: tiny little tactical level.
27:06
SPEAKER_01: It's like the book was still there and you needed to tend to what mattered most in that moment.
27:14
SPEAKER_01: So I wanna talk about the living on the road thing.
27:19
SPEAKER_01: I have so many clients right now who are like,
27:21
SPEAKER_01: I'm thinking about just like stopping this life And starting travel full-time.
27:28
SPEAKER_01: I have another friend who travels full-time who's worked on this show and has been
27:33
SPEAKER_01: a really important part of my journey.
27:35
SPEAKER_01: And people have so much curiosity about it.
27:39
SPEAKER_01: So tell us like some of the key nuts and bolts.
27:42
SPEAKER_01: We talked about the safety aspect of it.
27:44
SPEAKER_01: What are some of the other big questions people come to you with that are getting
27:48
SPEAKER_01: in their way and sort of maybe limiting the way they see the potential of this life?
27:54
SPEAKER_00: So safety is always a big one.
27:56
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
27:56
SPEAKER_00: Finances is a big one, too.
27:59
SPEAKER_00: So finances, I mean, to me, I think that's an individual thing.
28:03
SPEAKER_00: There's so many different ways to make it work to travel full time.
28:07
SPEAKER_00: You know, some people have it easy and they just they have a remote job.
28:10
SPEAKER_00: They're like, oh,
28:11
SPEAKER_00: I just take this with me wherever I go,
28:12
SPEAKER_00: whether it's Airbnb or in an RV, you name it.
28:15
SPEAKER_00: So that's easy.
28:16
SPEAKER_00: And then for RVing specifically,
28:18
SPEAKER_00: I've never done this because I've had A fruitful career as I've been traveling.
28:24
SPEAKER_00: But there's things as simple as work camping.
28:27
SPEAKER_00: And work camping might be working as a camp host.
28:31
SPEAKER_00: Work camping might be working for Amazon.
28:32
SPEAKER_00: There's all different things.
28:33
SPEAKER_00: There's actually a podcast called The Work Camper Show.
28:36
SPEAKER_00: I don't know what work camping is.
28:38
SPEAKER_00: Work camping is, there's all kinds of ways to work camp.
28:40
SPEAKER_00: Some work campers,
28:41
SPEAKER_00: they seasonally go and follow fruits and vegetables and they work camp and help
28:46
SPEAKER_00: With harvest or selling or cleaning.
28:49
SPEAKER_00: And from what I understand, work camping is just working while you're camping.
28:52
SPEAKER_00: So technically me and you are kind of work camping right now because I'm in Cotty
28:56
SPEAKER_00: and here we are sort of working.
28:58
SPEAKER_00: Not really, we're having fun.
28:59
SPEAKER_00: But yeah, so there's that to look into.
29:02
SPEAKER_00: And so if you're into,
29:03
SPEAKER_00: if you want to hit the road and you want to travel in an RV or camper of some sort,
29:06
SPEAKER_00: like Google that and see what ideas pop up.
29:09
SPEAKER_00: But the other part of it is the way I live.
29:11
SPEAKER_00: I don't live like I do to save money.
29:14
SPEAKER_00: I live like I do because I love living in nature and I love being off grid
29:17
SPEAKER_00: and not having to hook up to power.
29:21
SPEAKER_00: But the way I live is so inexpensive,
29:23
SPEAKER_00: it's ridiculous because I live on national forest lands or BLM lands or when I'm
29:29
SPEAKER_00: in Canada, crown lands.
29:31
SPEAKER_00: And it's almost always free.
29:33
SPEAKER_00: And water,
29:35
SPEAKER_00: I get that from gas stations or Campgrounds,
29:39
SPEAKER_00: I might pay a little bit every now and then, but most of the time that's free.
29:41
SPEAKER_00: And so I don't have many bills.
29:43
SPEAKER_00: I pay for my food.
29:44
SPEAKER_00: I have insurance on me, Cotty and my truck.
29:46
SPEAKER_00: You know, like I have some business expenses, but pretty much living off grid.
29:50
SPEAKER_00: Once you have the first,
29:51
SPEAKER_00: there's a financial impact of getting solar and composting toilets and all that.
29:55
SPEAKER_00: But after that, there's no rent or mortgage.
29:58
SPEAKER_00: So it's really simple.
30:00
SPEAKER_00: So I'm just sharing all this because it's a very individual thing.
30:04
SPEAKER_00: And yet it's doable.
30:05
SPEAKER_00: It's one of those things that you just get creative and figure it out.
30:08
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I'd love
30:09
SPEAKER_01: that answer too,
30:09
SPEAKER_01: because it kind of says,
30:11
SPEAKER_01: like asking yourself the question,
30:13
SPEAKER_01: is it possible or impossible is the wrong question.
30:16
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
30:17
SPEAKER_01: The question is, what are all the different ways to make this possible if this is what I want?
30:22
SPEAKER_01: Or what can I learn about this to understand if this is what I want?
30:28
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
30:29
SPEAKER_00: And then two, it's, you got to be up to not knowing.
30:34
SPEAKER_00: To me, any RVer, You know, I wonder most of the time I don't know where I'm going next.
30:40
SPEAKER_00: Like I really don't know.
30:41
SPEAKER_00: And so you can live like that or you could just be up to not knowing how
30:45
SPEAKER_00: to fix something or how to figure something out and just trying stuff.
30:50
SPEAKER_00: You know,
30:50
SPEAKER_00: like one of the quotes in the book that I've had a few people say was kind
30:53
SPEAKER_00: of funny is I said,
30:55
SPEAKER_00: you know,
30:56
SPEAKER_00: through firefighting and then through living like this,
30:58
SPEAKER_00: I learned that the seat of my pants has wings.
31:01
SPEAKER_00: You know, people like, oh, you got to live by the seat of your pants.
31:03
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, yeah, I do.
31:04
SPEAKER_00: And it has wings.
31:05
SPEAKER_00: Like things will work out.
31:06
SPEAKER_00: But you can't just give in and feel helpless and think somebody else is going
31:11
SPEAKER_00: to come to the rescue.
31:12
SPEAKER_00: You've got to be up for just trying stuff.
31:15
SPEAKER_00: And then another part of being a full-time traveler is realizing it's okay to ask
31:20
SPEAKER_00: for help, even from complete strangers.
31:24
SPEAKER_00: That's another lesson I learned is how much people enjoy it when you ask for help.
31:29
SPEAKER_00: And so I've just gotten really good at that.
31:31
SPEAKER_00: I don't even think of it as asking for help.
31:33
SPEAKER_00: You know,
31:33
SPEAKER_00: like I was walking down a dirt road the other day and there's a lot of ticks
31:37
SPEAKER_00: where I'm at and I don't have good feeling in my hands and feet because of
31:40
SPEAKER_00: the autoimmune thing from the fire department.
31:43
SPEAKER_00: And so the only place I really can't figure out if there's a tick is in my scalp.
31:47
SPEAKER_00: And I saw a husband and wife walking on the road and I said, can you check it?
31:51
SPEAKER_00: Make sure I have a tick right here.
31:52
SPEAKER_00: And they're like, sure.
31:53
SPEAKER_00: And they looked, they're like, oh, no, it's a bug bite, no tick.
31:55
SPEAKER_00: And then we become friends.
31:57
SPEAKER_00: Like we've gone kayaking and we've hung out.
31:59
SPEAKER_00: And it's like all because I asked a couple people to check my scalp for a tick.
32:04
SPEAKER_00: Like you never know where a connection is going to lead.
32:07
SPEAKER_00: And oh, that's another one, connection.
32:09
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
32:10
SPEAKER_00: Like this could be a very lonely life if you want it to be.
32:15
SPEAKER_00: It could be a very solitude, quiet life.
32:17
SPEAKER_00: And some people would love that.
32:18
SPEAKER_00: And I do sometimes too.
32:20
SPEAKER_00: But traveling,
32:22
SPEAKER_00: especially as a solo female,
32:25
SPEAKER_00: I am invited into so many incredible lives,
32:29
SPEAKER_00: whether it's being asked over for dinner or asked to go on adventures or asked to go
32:34
SPEAKER_00: on a hike or asked to just change course and come this way and end up in Labrador.
32:41
SPEAKER_00: As a single female, the first thing is you have to get over this made up stuff about society.
32:47
SPEAKER_00: There are bad people out there,
32:48
SPEAKER_00: but don't watch the news and don't believe it all and just go live your life.
32:53
SPEAKER_00: If you can live your life and not be afraid of living,
32:56
SPEAKER_00: there's so much potential for connection and adventure and magic
33:02
SPEAKER_00: beyond your wildest dreams.
33:04
SPEAKER_00: And I didn't know that until I began living it.
33:07
SPEAKER_01: And yeah.
33:08
SPEAKER_01: It's like our biggest fears in so many ways are being emotionally hurt or vulnerable
33:15
SPEAKER_01: And so much of that relates to other people.
33:18
SPEAKER_01: And I think we hear again and again in your story how you open yourself up to that possibility.
33:23
SPEAKER_01: And I don't think that was always your way of being.
33:26
SPEAKER_01: It seems like you were a pretty tough check and you've gotten tougher by getting softer.
33:32
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
33:34
SPEAKER_00: And just,
33:34
SPEAKER_00: you know,
33:35
SPEAKER_00: part of what I think like this,
33:37
SPEAKER_00: the connecting with people part is,
33:39
SPEAKER_00: you know,
33:39
SPEAKER_00: I used to be in the matrix with everyone else and rush, rush,
33:43
SPEAKER_00: rush and not have time and,
33:44
SPEAKER_00: you know,
33:44
SPEAKER_00: go to the grocery store and know what I need and go get it and get out
33:47
SPEAKER_00: because I got things to do.
33:48
SPEAKER_00: And most of the time, life is just different now.
33:51
SPEAKER_00: I talk to people and it's not because I'm trying to build connection.
33:54
SPEAKER_00: I just curious.
33:56
SPEAKER_00: And I feel like I move slower.
33:57
SPEAKER_00: I think slower.
33:58
SPEAKER_00: And most of the time, sometimes not.
34:01
SPEAKER_00: And connection, deep, deep.
34:03
SPEAKER_00: Connection just happens and often a matter of minutes.
34:08
SPEAKER_00: You know,
34:08
SPEAKER_00: and that's another part of the book is,
34:11
SPEAKER_00: you know,
34:11
SPEAKER_00: I don't know,
34:11
SPEAKER_00: I haven't taken a final count,
34:13
SPEAKER_00: but I know before one of the big edits,
34:15
SPEAKER_00: there was 90 to 95 people mentioned in the book on this journey.
34:19
SPEAKER_00: And this is just one year of my life.
34:21
SPEAKER_00: It's the most incredible year of the journey.
34:24
SPEAKER_00: But that's how many people...
34:25
SPEAKER_00: And there were so many people I couldn't put in the book or
34:27
SPEAKER_00: the thing would have been in an encyclopedia.
34:29
SPEAKER_00: But I have all these incredible experiences with strangers because I'm not rushing
34:37
SPEAKER_00: to get to the next place.
34:38
SPEAKER_00: And I see them and I'm curious and they're curious.
34:42
SPEAKER_00: And I know the truth is... And this is something I talk about a lot with people is...
34:47
SPEAKER_00: People are so attracted to you being your authentic self and not faking,
34:52
SPEAKER_00: not trying to be something else.
34:54
SPEAKER_00: And I think that's another reason I get invited a lot because I'm not trying to be anybody else.
34:58
SPEAKER_00: I'm this feral chick living in the woods, barefooted with dirt under my nails.
35:02
SPEAKER_00: And people are like, what are you doing out here?
35:05
SPEAKER_00: And how does this work?
35:06
SPEAKER_00: And before you know it, we're BFFs.
35:10
SPEAKER_00: I think you're right.
35:10
SPEAKER_01: I think that's all any of us are looking for is that authenticity and
35:15
SPEAKER_01: And just real humans doing real things and being bravely honest about who
35:20
SPEAKER_01: and what they are.
35:21
SPEAKER_01: So if our biggest fear for most of us is being emotionally hurt,
35:26
SPEAKER_01: the other is dying or getting hurt or injured.
35:30
SPEAKER_01: And I know we talked about the danger stuff a little bit,
35:32
SPEAKER_01: but I want to talk about it through the context more of mortality, right?
35:37
SPEAKER_01: And especially right now,
35:39
SPEAKER_01: after losing your precious mother, one of the major themes in the book is...
35:44
SPEAKER_01: We're all going to die.
35:46
SPEAKER_01: And then side by side with that is that awareness mortality that so many
35:49
SPEAKER_01: of us encounter, especially in midlife where we're like, ooh, I'm going to die.
35:55
SPEAKER_00: Like, what am I waiting for?
35:57
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you already have permission.
35:59
SPEAKER_00: You were born with a permission to live the life that's calling you.
36:04
SPEAKER_00: And if the life that's calling you is not what you're doing right now, why wait?
36:08
SPEAKER_00: Why would you wait another minute not to live the life that's The life
36:13
SPEAKER_00: of your dreams or whatever you want to call that.
36:15
SPEAKER_00: And again, you don't have to know how it's going to happen in the exact steps or the outcome.
36:22
SPEAKER_00: If you're tickled,
36:22
SPEAKER_00: if your soul is tickled,
36:23
SPEAKER_00: you just take that first step and you trust that you'll be tickled to another,
36:26
SPEAKER_00: you know?
36:27
SPEAKER_00: But, you know,
36:28
SPEAKER_00: because, yeah,
36:28
SPEAKER_00: I've heard here that so much,
36:30
SPEAKER_00: you know,
36:30
SPEAKER_00: because I'm almost 50 and I have a lot of friends that are older and there's
36:34
SPEAKER_00: so many people saying, you know, I don't have enough time to fill in the blank.
36:38
SPEAKER_00: I'm too late.
36:39
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
36:40
SPEAKER_00: And it's like, no, you have all the time, you know, you're still breathing.
36:44
SPEAKER_00: And then I love that you brought up the mortality part because the other part of,
36:48
SPEAKER_00: you know, big ahas I've had on this journey is just who I am and I'm not my body.
36:55
SPEAKER_00: Like my body one day is going to take its last breath.
36:58
SPEAKER_00: My body one day is going to have its last heartbeat.
37:01
SPEAKER_00: But I'm really enjoying this life in my body, but I'm not scared to die.
37:05
SPEAKER_00: And I think that changes everything.
37:07
SPEAKER_00: It was kind of a shock to me the first time I realized I wasn't scared to die.
37:10
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, well, that's interesting.
37:12
SPEAKER_00: And then the second time I really thought I was going to die, you read about it in the book.
37:16
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, well, I guess this is what's happening today.
37:19
SPEAKER_00: You know, it's like it was one of those.
37:21
SPEAKER_00: It was just like, okay.
37:22
SPEAKER_00: And then I got really excited.
37:24
SPEAKER_00: It was incredible.
37:25
SPEAKER_00: I was literally, I couldn't even sit up.
37:26
SPEAKER_00: I was so sick.
37:27
SPEAKER_00: And I thought, I'm probably going to die right here in this bed.
37:30
SPEAKER_00: And then I just laid there and got still and listened to the birds trip out of the window.
37:34
SPEAKER_00: And I was just like, I can't wait to see what this is going to be like.
37:37
SPEAKER_00: It was just childlike curiosity of, What's going to happen?
37:42
SPEAKER_00: Because no one actually knows.
37:44
SPEAKER_00: They have theories, but no one's died all the way and been gone for whatever.
37:48
SPEAKER_00: And, you know, there's been near death.
37:51
SPEAKER_00: But I was really curious.
37:52
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I can't wait to be on this journey.
37:55
SPEAKER_00: This is going to be so cool.
37:56
SPEAKER_00: I get to see what happens.
37:56
SPEAKER_00: Like there was no fear of death at all.
37:59
SPEAKER_00: So if we can all see ourselves and see who we are in that special way,
38:05
SPEAKER_00: what if you weren't afraid to die?
38:07
SPEAKER_00: How would you live?
38:08
SPEAKER_01: Mm hmm.
38:09
SPEAKER_01: A dear friend of mine has really advanced ALS.
38:12
SPEAKER_01: He's written a gorgeous book.
38:14
SPEAKER_01: I'll send you the link.
38:15
SPEAKER_01: His name is Brian Johnson.
38:16
SPEAKER_01: And I feel like you two share a lot of life philosophies.
38:19
SPEAKER_01: He wrote his book with his eyes.
38:21
SPEAKER_01: So also a pretty remarkable story.
38:24
SPEAKER_01: And he has no use of his body other than his eyes.
38:28
SPEAKER_01: And he can feel everything physically.
38:32
SPEAKER_01: His skin can feel, but he cannot control any other muscles than his eyes.
38:38
SPEAKER_01: And he wrote something recently.
38:41
SPEAKER_01: He said,
38:41
SPEAKER_01: people ask me all the time,
38:42
SPEAKER_01: what would you do with your life now having had ALS if you no longer had it?
38:48
SPEAKER_01: He said, well, I would have sex with my wife.
38:52
SPEAKER_01: I would not worry about making too much money any more than I need to keep my children alive.
38:58
SPEAKER_01: They have five children,
38:59
SPEAKER_01: of course,
39:00
SPEAKER_01: that they're raising together and the five children are caring for him
39:03
SPEAKER_01: and they're like the most amazing family.
39:06
SPEAKER_01: And he said I would help people in some capacity,
39:10
SPEAKER_01: but only in a way that would allow me to take two months off a year to just travel
39:16
SPEAKER_01: and do what I want.
39:18
SPEAKER_01: And I thought it was such a nice distillation of perspective from this guy
39:24
SPEAKER_01: whose body for all intents and purposes isn't his any longer.
39:29
SPEAKER_01: He does not have a body in the way that most of us think of it,
39:34
SPEAKER_01: but what he does have is Bonkers huge life force and an extraordinary mind
39:42
SPEAKER_01: and rich ideas and vision.
39:46
SPEAKER_01: And his life probably looks quite a bit like yours right now.
39:50
SPEAKER_01: And if we were to all ask ourselves that question, like, well,
39:54
SPEAKER_01: like if this were the end or you just had one last shot,
39:59
SPEAKER_01: which we all do because life is finite, what would you be doing?
40:03
SPEAKER_01: I wonder how many of us would have a life that looks closer to
40:06
SPEAKER_01: the one Brian described, the one you described.
40:09
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's a big question because that just, to me,
40:14
SPEAKER_00: everything you just said is,
40:18
SPEAKER_00: it's just a way to narrow in to the tickles of our soul because they're there.
40:23
SPEAKER_00: They're there,
40:23
SPEAKER_00: but most of us have every reason in the world of why to keep grinding
40:28
SPEAKER_00: or whatever you want to call it, you know?
40:31
SPEAKER_00: But yeah, your friend, you know, he just has a different perspective than most.
40:36
SPEAKER_00: And I feel like we've been taught,
40:38
SPEAKER_00: we've been programmed to think we need to work part of the best years
40:43
SPEAKER_00: of our lives away.
40:45
SPEAKER_00: And yeah, and I don't want to sound privileged.
40:46
SPEAKER_00: There's a big section of my book about privilege and especially indigenous cultures.
40:51
SPEAKER_00: And I learned a lot from the Inuit when I spent time with them in the book.
40:56
SPEAKER_00: And so I don't want to sound privileged and be like, who cares?
40:59
SPEAKER_00: Like, Live your life, you know, but the tickles of your soul come in so many different ways.
41:04
SPEAKER_00: You know,
41:05
SPEAKER_00: one of my beta readers,
41:06
SPEAKER_00: his wife is one of my best friends and,
41:08
SPEAKER_00: you know, by default ended up being good friends with him.
41:10
SPEAKER_00: But he read the book and he said, you know what?
41:12
SPEAKER_00: I almost couldn't finish your book.
41:14
SPEAKER_00: Like you were talking some stuff in there and it was just like,
41:17
SPEAKER_00: I was feeling a little attacked, you know?
41:19
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, how?
41:20
SPEAKER_00: I don't want to attack anybody.
41:21
SPEAKER_00: He was just like, well,
41:22
SPEAKER_00: you're saying like,
41:23
SPEAKER_00: if you don't really just love your work, Maybe you should find something else to do.
41:27
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, well, I guess I sort of kind of say that.
41:30
SPEAKER_00: But he's like, you know, my work, I don't love it, but I love the freedom it gives me.
41:35
SPEAKER_00: And I love that I can pay.
41:36
SPEAKER_00: I'm sending three boys through college,
41:39
SPEAKER_00: you know,
41:39
SPEAKER_00: and he's like, Yeah, I might not like I'm not in love with the actual work.
41:44
SPEAKER_00: And I said, Well,
41:46
SPEAKER_00: it sounds to me like the tickles of your soul are like,
41:49
SPEAKER_00: Hey, your job is pretty cool.
41:50
SPEAKER_00: It gives you the freedom you want.
41:51
SPEAKER_00: And it's paying for three young men to go to college.
41:54
SPEAKER_00: Like that sounds like a good tickle to me.
41:56
SPEAKER_00: You know, like, so it's just, you know, like, I know this guy.
42:03
SPEAKER_00: And he's one of the most natural people,
42:07
SPEAKER_00: people that are living this natural way that your friend with ALS
42:11
SPEAKER_00: and me are speaking about.
42:13
SPEAKER_00: But I think he thought that if he wasn't just in love and couldn't wait to go
42:18
SPEAKER_00: to work every day, Like he was going against the tickles.
42:22
SPEAKER_00: Doing it wrong.
42:23
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
42:24
SPEAKER_00: And I love that you brought up doing it wrong because he's not doing it wrong.
42:27
SPEAKER_00: I see his life and he's living a pretty marvelous life and his kids are great
42:31
SPEAKER_00: and his wife's incredible.
42:32
SPEAKER_00: It's like one of the most beautiful families you ever meet.
42:35
SPEAKER_00: But I can understand if he thinks he's doing it wrong,
42:37
SPEAKER_00: how that would lead to discomfort and doubt.
42:41
SPEAKER_00: And I love your question or your statement of getting it wrong because to me,
42:44
SPEAKER_00: that's one of the most important questions we could ask ourselves.
42:47
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
42:48
SPEAKER_00: If I knew I couldn't get it wrong, what would I do?
42:53
SPEAKER_00: And to me, this isn't a notion of good and bad, right and wrong.
42:56
SPEAKER_00: It's not like that.
42:57
SPEAKER_00: It's just saying, say you got two choices or 10 choices on the table.
43:00
SPEAKER_00: A lot of times we let our brain take charge and we do the logical thing.
43:04
SPEAKER_00: But what that question does for me when I ask it,
43:07
SPEAKER_00: if I'm feeling stuck and if the decision feels difficult,
43:10
SPEAKER_00: my theory is the decision's already made.
43:12
SPEAKER_00: Like the tickles of my soul know the answer.
43:15
SPEAKER_00: I'm just either talking myself into something or out of something.
43:18
SPEAKER_00: So I asked that question.
43:20
SPEAKER_00: If I knew,
43:20
SPEAKER_00: another way to put it,
43:21
SPEAKER_00: if I knew everything would turn out just fine,
43:23
SPEAKER_00: even if I don't know what just fine means, what would I do?
43:26
SPEAKER_00: And usually the answer is really simple.
43:29
SPEAKER_00: It's just there.
43:30
SPEAKER_00: Well, if I knew I couldn't get it wrong and everything would turn out just fine,
43:33
SPEAKER_00: I would go in the blank.
43:35
SPEAKER_00: Well, that's just a little lesson in what it feels like to follow the tickles of your soul.
43:39
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
43:40
SPEAKER_01: I think that sort of filter is really powerful because we are,
43:45
SPEAKER_01: it's like learning a foreign language in a sense.
43:49
SPEAKER_01: Right?
43:49
SPEAKER_01: Like the first time somebody speaks French to you, you're like, what are they saying?
43:54
SPEAKER_01: It's just like, blah, blah, blah, blah, sounds.
43:57
SPEAKER_01: And I kind of think that because we have put so many layers between us
44:01
SPEAKER_01: and our intuition, that's what it sounds like.
44:03
SPEAKER_01: It just sounds all like mixed up in a cacophony of sounds.
44:07
SPEAKER_01: And so I feel like questions like the ones you're asking are clarifying questions
44:11
SPEAKER_01: to help sort of like fine tune our radar to what sounds true and what is true.
44:20
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
44:22
SPEAKER_00: What is true?
44:23
SPEAKER_00: And cattle tea true.
44:25
SPEAKER_00: Because a lot of times we need someone on the outside to come and tap us on
44:29
SPEAKER_00: the shoulder and point out where we're stuck.
44:32
SPEAKER_00: Because it feels so true and it's not.
44:34
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
44:35
SPEAKER_01: So Christy,
44:37
SPEAKER_01: one of my favorite things about this show is that our audience is made up
44:42
SPEAKER_01: of uplifters,
44:43
SPEAKER_01: women who believe in lifting others and believe that we all have so much
44:48
SPEAKER_01: to contribute, but also so much abundance to share.
44:53
SPEAKER_01: So how can we lift and support you?
44:56
SPEAKER_00: One, if you haven't, read it for yourself.
44:59
SPEAKER_00: It'll change your life.
45:00
SPEAKER_00: It really will.
45:01
SPEAKER_00: And then two, once you've read it, share with a friend.
45:04
SPEAKER_00: That's it.
45:05
SPEAKER_00: I had somebody ask me, we need to get your message out in the world.
45:09
SPEAKER_00: Let's work on scaling up your business.
45:11
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, my soul isn't tickled to scale up my business.
45:15
SPEAKER_00: My business is doing fine.
45:16
SPEAKER_00: It's cool.
45:17
SPEAKER_00: But I feel like I'm not a YouTuber.
45:19
SPEAKER_00: I'm a very private person, except for in this book, because let me tell you...
45:22
SPEAKER_00: You're so honest and so brave.
45:25
SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh.
45:25
SPEAKER_01: That's why it's good though.
45:27
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I spill all the beans.
45:29
SPEAKER_00: Good for you.
45:30
SPEAKER_00: That was another thing we didn't talk about is this book is written from my journal
45:33
SPEAKER_00: and I never thought I'd ever share this with anyone, even a closest friend.
45:38
SPEAKER_00: And there's stuff in this book I've never shared with anyone,
45:40
SPEAKER_00: but my editor encouraged me to put it all out there.
45:44
SPEAKER_00: And it is like, that's,
45:45
SPEAKER_00: I think other people have written me and said,
45:49
SPEAKER_00: thank you for writing this book because you've freed me to not be embarrassed
45:53
SPEAKER_00: to share like things that I think are embarrassing because I shared all, I mean,
45:58
SPEAKER_00: There's a poem about taking a poop in a toilet,
46:00
SPEAKER_00: you know, like, and then there's... You
46:02
SPEAKER_01: pooped off a boat.
46:04
SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
46:05
SPEAKER_01: We know we learned your favorite way to pee is while holding on to the truck
46:10
SPEAKER_01: while squatting off the rail.
46:12
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
46:13
SPEAKER_00: And then, you know, there's one, again, my first editor said, leave everything in.
46:19
SPEAKER_00: Write the book, but don't edit.
46:21
SPEAKER_00: Let me take it out.
46:23
SPEAKER_00: So good.
46:23
SPEAKER_00: And so when I did that,
46:24
SPEAKER_00: I was expecting to cut a lot of stuff
46:26
SPEAKER_00: because there's stuff I feel like Is like adult content only.
46:30
SPEAKER_00: Like I'm writing about myself and the experiences and I'm like,
46:33
SPEAKER_00: there's no way this is going to go, but I'm following instructions.
46:35
SPEAKER_00: And he's like, no, you can't take it out.
46:37
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, oh my gosh, you can't, I can't leave that in the book.
46:39
SPEAKER_00: And he goes,
46:40
SPEAKER_00: and you know,
46:41
SPEAKER_00: this isn't a spoiler or anything, but my editor who was, I had several editors.
46:45
SPEAKER_00: The first one was a man, the rest were women.
46:47
SPEAKER_00: But he said,
46:49
SPEAKER_00: you just described like the most beautiful experience
46:53
SPEAKER_00: of female arousal I have ever read or heard.
46:58
SPEAKER_00: People need to read this.
47:00
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, but it's embarrassing.
47:01
SPEAKER_00: Like that was not supposed to be in the book.
47:03
SPEAKER_00: And he said, no,
47:04
SPEAKER_00: it's in the book because people,
47:06
SPEAKER_00: especially guys,
47:07
SPEAKER_00: and especially maybe women too,
47:09
SPEAKER_00: because maybe they haven't felt exactly the same thing you did,
47:12
SPEAKER_00: but Like we need to stay in the book.
47:15
SPEAKER_00: And I was just like, my gosh, okay.
47:18
SPEAKER_00: And so it just opened the door.
47:19
SPEAKER_00: Like that was the first difficult one to just share myself like that.
47:24
SPEAKER_00: And then I finally was like, forget it.
47:25
SPEAKER_00: Let's just share it all.
47:26
SPEAKER_00: So the other thing that this book does is I feel like it gives permission,
47:29
SPEAKER_00: whether you're a writer or just a regular person,
47:32
SPEAKER_00: to just not be so embarrassed about sharing yourself,
47:35
SPEAKER_01: you know?
47:35
SPEAKER_01: Well,
47:36
SPEAKER_01: that's what you were saying exactly before when you talk about making connections
47:39
SPEAKER_01: with people and being like, can you find the dick on my head?
47:43
SPEAKER_01: Right?
47:43
SPEAKER_01: Like those are the things we edit all day long, but what are we attracted to?
47:47
SPEAKER_01: We're attracted to people who aren't editing and trying to hide and confuse us
47:52
SPEAKER_01: with all the layers.
47:53
SPEAKER_01: They're just themselves.
47:54
SPEAKER_01: That is super attractive and it's what makes a great book.
47:57
SPEAKER_00: If you have a book club,
47:59
SPEAKER_00: this is like the epitome of a perfect book club book because you could talk
48:02
SPEAKER_00: for hours and hours.
48:03
SPEAKER_00: If you have a book club, read it.
48:05
SPEAKER_00: Like that's it.
48:06
SPEAKER_01: I'm totally going to recommend this to my local town book club.
48:09
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
48:09
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
48:09
SPEAKER_00: It's a good idea.
48:10
SPEAKER_01: Thank you for that reminder.
48:12
SPEAKER_01: Thanks.
48:12
SPEAKER_01: You know,
48:13
SPEAKER_01: I talk to people all the time about making asks and asking for what they want
48:17
SPEAKER_01: and need.
48:18
SPEAKER_01: And the thing I've been preaching lately over and over is,
48:21
SPEAKER_00: please be specific with us.
48:23
SPEAKER_00: We have too much going on.
48:25
SPEAKER_01: We cannot read your mind.
48:26
SPEAKER_01: We do not know what you really want.
48:28
SPEAKER_01: Please just ask us for what you need.
48:29
SPEAKER_01: And we're probably really happy.
48:31
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, exactly.
48:32
SPEAKER_01: But like, I didn't even think of the book club until you just said it.
48:35
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
48:35
SPEAKER_01: Not because it's not an obvious idea, but because It wasn't on my mind.
48:41
SPEAKER_01: So thank you for that specific ask.
48:43
SPEAKER_00: If you happen to know someone who knows Oprah or Jenna or
48:46
SPEAKER_00: the Sunshine Book Club folks, I mean, let them know too.
48:49
SPEAKER_00: Hook it up.
48:50
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
48:51
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
48:52
SPEAKER_01: I mean, I'm all about that too.
48:55
SPEAKER_01: Like let's might as well say it if that's what we want.
48:58
SPEAKER_01: There you go.
48:58
SPEAKER_01: What is like the next big brave dream for you?
49:01
SPEAKER_00: Well, you know,
49:02
SPEAKER_00: I feel like my dreams come from the universe and,
49:05
SPEAKER_00: you know, where I'm sitting in New Hampshire right now in Cotty.
49:08
SPEAKER_00: And if I didn't have book events planned out West beginning in August, I wouldn't leave.
49:14
SPEAKER_00: I would grow roots and stay here forever.
49:16
SPEAKER_00: But I think what I'm going to do is I'm going to go in my normal wander
49:19
SPEAKER_00: and head South when it gets cold.
49:21
SPEAKER_00: And then when it gets warm enough to head North and the snow melts in New Hampshire,
49:25
SPEAKER_00: I think I'm going to be back here.
49:27
SPEAKER_00: And I have a feeling I'm growing roots and I have a feeling this time next year,
49:30
SPEAKER_00: I will not be able to call myself a nomad.
49:33
SPEAKER_00: So it's not written in stone, but that's the big leap, I think, is to talk about a life change.
49:38
SPEAKER_00: Like this is, you know, the next act.
49:41
SPEAKER_00: And yeah,
49:42
SPEAKER_00: so we're building an educational regenerative farm where we're going
49:45
SPEAKER_00: to teach farmers how to farm with nature and not against it without chemicals.
49:48
SPEAKER_00: And then we're going to bring leaders from all over the world
49:50
SPEAKER_00: and show them how regenerative farming
49:52
SPEAKER_00: and nature can help them
49:53
SPEAKER_01: build incredible businesses.
49:55
SPEAKER_01: So amazing.
49:56
SPEAKER_00: And live in paradise while doing it.
49:58
SPEAKER_00: So I can see myself staying here forever.
50:00
SPEAKER_00: Who knows?
50:01
SPEAKER_00: But that's what's next.
50:02
SPEAKER_01: I really hope this happens selfishly because I want you to come
50:06
SPEAKER_01: to Uplifters Live next March and hang out with the community and tell everyone
50:12
SPEAKER_01: about this and sign book.
50:14
SPEAKER_01: Oh, I'm in.
50:15
SPEAKER_01: All right.
50:15
SPEAKER_01: I'll see you in March in New York, if not before.
50:18
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
50:19
SPEAKER_01: And one of my other favorite parts about this show is that every guest Uplifts
50:24
SPEAKER_01: a woman who uplifts her and believes will uplift us with her story.
50:28
SPEAKER_01: So who would you like to nominate?
50:30
SPEAKER_00: I want to nominate one of my closest friends.
50:32
SPEAKER_00: Her name is Marina Galan.
50:34
SPEAKER_00: And she lives in Querétaro, Mexico.
50:37
SPEAKER_00: And she is a wise, wise sage.
50:40
SPEAKER_00: And she's in the book.
50:41
SPEAKER_00: There's a point where I'm in Mexico and you'll get to meet Marina.
50:45
SPEAKER_00: And I think just reading her little part in the book, you'll know why.
50:47
SPEAKER_00: But yeah, she would be a great uplifter.
50:50
SPEAKER_00: Amazing.
50:51
SPEAKER_01: I can't wait.
50:52
SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much again for writing this book.
50:54
SPEAKER_01: Thank you for your time.
50:55
SPEAKER_01: Thank you for just the beauty and the warmth and the soft, gentle fierceness of you.
51:03
SPEAKER_01: It was so wonderful to meet you, Christy.
51:06
SPEAKER_01: And I look forward to meeting you in person.
51:09
SPEAKER_00: Can't wait.
51:09
SPEAKER_00: And thank you so much for this.
51:13
SPEAKER_01: Thank you for listening to The Uplifters Podcast.
51:16
SPEAKER_01: If you're getting a boost from these episodes,
51:19
SPEAKER_01: please share them with The Uplifters in your life and then join us in conversation
51:25
SPEAKER_01: over at theuplifterspodcast.com.
51:28
SPEAKER_01: Head over to Spotify,
51:30
SPEAKER_01: Apple Podcasts,
51:31
SPEAKER_01: or wherever you get your podcasts and like, follow, and rate our show.
51:37
SPEAKER_01: It'll really help us connect with more uplifters and it'll ensure you never miss one
51:42
SPEAKER_01: of these beautiful stories.
51:46
SPEAKER_02: Big love.
51:49
SPEAKER_02: Painted water, sunshine.
51:51
SPEAKER_02: With rosemary and tongue, dwell in the perplexing, though you find it vexing.
51:58
SPEAKER_02: Toss a star and hover, be your own best lover.
52:02
SPEAKER_02: Relish in a new prime, plant a tree in springtime.
52:07
SPEAKER_02: Dance with idle hindsight, bring the sun to twilight.
52:12
SPEAKER_02: Lift you up.
52:14
SPEAKER_03: Lift you up.
52:16
SPEAKER_03: Lift you up.
52:17
SPEAKER_03: Lift you up.
52:40
SPEAKER_03: Lift you up.
52:45
SPEAKER_03: Lift you up.
52:46
SPEAKER_03: Beautiful.
52:48
SPEAKER_03: I cried.
52:50
SPEAKER_03: It's that little thing you did with your voice.
52:59
SPEAKER_03: Right?
52:59
SPEAKER_03: In the pre-chorus, right?
53:01
SPEAKER_03: I was like... Mommy, stop crying.
53:05
SPEAKER_01: Mommy, stop crying.
53:06
SPEAKER_01: You're disturbing the peace.