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Single & Set Apart: More Than Just Finding a Spouse · For Such a Time as This

• 0:04
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome back to another episode of Perceptive Time Is This, a podcast about calling, timing, and trusting God in the season that you're actually in, not just the one you hope to be in.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_01: My name's Bethany and I'm your host.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_01: This season is our second season.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_01: It's called Single and Set Apart.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm talking to um Christian singles or people that were single kind of later in life but aren't single anymore.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_01: Um and I'm super excited for what you guys might learn in this season.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_01: Um, so let's just sit back, relax, and see what God might have for you in this episode.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_01: Hi guys, this is my friend Natalie.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_01: I'm super excited to have her today.
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much for coming.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_01: Yay! Yeah.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_01: All right, let's just jump right in.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so tell me about singleness in your 20s, your mid to late 20s.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I mean, well, there's not much to say, if I'm being honest.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_03: I was single from high school all the way through till 27.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_03: So, like, that's it was just long.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, it was long and it was lonely, but it wasn't filled with heartbreak.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_03: And looking back, I'm thankful for that.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_03: That's just like there were a lot of you know how like in high school you have like, oh, well, he likes me, and like, so there would be some people like that that I could look back, but it was never a dating relationship.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_03: Um, so I graduated from Towson and that was kind of like, oh no, like now there's still no one.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_03: And then I went to work at a small Christian school, and then it was like, I'm with fourth graders all day.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_03: Uh-huh.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_03: Like, what are we gonna do now?
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_03: Um, so then as I started getting teaching, I I threw myself into teaching and I loved it.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_03: It was where I found fulfillment and it started to be by as I was getting older, the parents were like, could we set you up?
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_03: Like, and so that happened a couple times.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and I would go on like a couple dates, but it just weren't right.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_03: It also, as I was getting older, the people they were setting me up with were like 21 or young still.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_03: I my life is drastically different than in college.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_03: So yeah, it just didn't work out.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_03: But then finally, somebody did um, they set me up with someone on the other side of the country, which I wanted to go for it.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_03: And I don't know if you like maybe you'll identify with this, but like people kept telling me I was picky.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm like, I do.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't notify.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_03: But I d I wasn't even trying to be picky.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_03: Like I'm like, there's there's not a lot of options right here.
• 2:33
  SPEAKER_03: And it wasn't even but there weren't single guys like, oh, I don't like that about him.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_03: I don't Right.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_03: It just weren't options.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_03: So when this guy came off, which blanket statement, he's a great guy.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_03: If he lived here, I hope we would still be friends and he would get along with my husband, Greg.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_03: Like, so there's nothing wrong with that guy.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_03: It just wasn't meant to be.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_03: And we we tried the long distance, but it finally came down to where he didn't want to move, I didn't want to move.
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 3:00
  SPEAKER_03: And it was just like, okay, this isn't meant to be.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_03: And so we broke up.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_03: And so that was a very short relationship.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_03: We started dating like September-ish, and we were finished by February.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_03: So love, yeah.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_03: Like, so that's my dating before my husband, like my dating history, which feels kind of totally anticlimatic, but it was like it was just no years of singleness.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, I feel and then once I met Matt, things went really quickly.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_03: I had tried, so I had friends that I would go on vacation with, and we had tried e-hearmy.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know, is e-harmony still a thing?
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_03: Like it is, but it's like it's it's it's just the yeah.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, see that in like 20.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_02: I tried it.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_02: It's not good.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_03: So like 2017 to 2020, it was like the one that you knew were serious, like because it was expensive.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_03: And so, like, yeah, if people were on there, they were actually gonna try.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_03: And so I don't know.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_03: My friends and I did that.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_03: My one friend and I went to Williamsburg and we both signed up, and she found her husband in the two-week trial.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_03: The Lord had it work out, and she got married the next year.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm like, what?
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_03: So I tried it for I paid three months.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_03: I tried, didn't work.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_03: And then I gave up, and I'm like, I hate online dating, I'm never doing this again.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and then another friend, the January of that next year, signed up and found her husband.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_03: And so when she got married in July that night of her wedding, I came home because that was the last single friend I had.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm like, all right, we're gonna try this.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_03: And a month later, I met Matt on e-commy.
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_03: So it turned out, but I look back and I'm just like, how did God get me from not working at all to like suddenly it worked?
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I know.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_01: I feel like that's the story is when it when you find someone that it's like, well, really fast too.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_03: It was.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_03: We we met we started talking on the 29th of August.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_03: We met October 5th, got engaged December 9th or 7th.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, but I mean, that is really fast though.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_03: And got married July 25th.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_03: So we got no year there.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_03: Wow, yeah.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_03: But we were just like, it this is it.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_03: And when we made it kind of funny looking back, but when I made my second e-Harmony account, I was so brutally honest.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_03: I put everything out there of just like, please don't tell me you're a Christian if you never read your Bible.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_03: Please don't talk to me.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I didn't say it that way, but I was like, this is important to me.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_03: And there weren't a lot of people that wanted that.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_03: And I did have some good conversations, but then Matt, when I found his profile, it was the exact same way.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_03: He was just like, I'm done.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_03: My funny story with Matt is that he little did I know, he was so sick of online dating that eHarmony gave you gave you prompts of like what to say to people.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_00: He had a file on his desktop where he had answers that he would copy and paste hysterically because he was so sick.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_00: He's like, What are my hobbies?
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_00: Copy, paste.
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_03: And I was the first person that he didn't do that with because I refused to like ask easy questions.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_03: I don't think in 2026 I would do well because I was like, I mean, we asked, I don't know.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_03: I did things backwards.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_03: I was like, Do you want kids?
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_03: Are you gonna be a father?
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_03: Like, are you gonna be a present father?
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_03: All of these really tough.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_03: And then we got to know each other through dating.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_03: But like, truthfully, we just like went right to the the hard stuff.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_03: And that set us up really well because we were both so sick of the like, do you like kayaking on the weekend?
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_02: It's like, I um I don't kayak very often.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_02: I I maybe once every two years, it's fine, but it's not me.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I don't know.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_03: That's what I find difficult with the world we live in today.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_03: It's it's hard to get to know someone in a really authentic way.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_01: Especially through online dating, honestly.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_01: During the whole period before you met Matt, do you feel like you had the opportunity to grow closer to God during that time?
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_03: Absolutely.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_03: And looking back, I'm so thankful for that.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_03: Um, my pastor likes to quote a Puritan writer that says that when you read your Bible, there's spade work.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_03: Like you think of your garden and you have your little shovel, and you might be doing just a little, but you're digging deep and you're trying to get the rocks out, and you're just focused on that small little work.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_03: And sometimes when we read our Bible, we're we're doing spade work, we're we're really digging down.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_03: And then in other seasons of life, it's plow work, you know.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_03: Think of like Mar Ingleswilder, yeah, and you're you're just really shallow.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_03: And I feel like singleness was my season of spade work where I got to focus on like word studies and I got to actually know who God was.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I got to know him beyond Bible class at school.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_03: I found that to be really important for me.
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_03: When I went to Towson, it was my first experience outside of a Christian home, outside of a Christian school, and it was suddenly like, why do I believe this?
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_03: And I found that, you know, I love worship music.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_03: This is not a diss toward music worship music, but I it wasn't enough.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_03: I had to get past like, why does the Bible actually say these real life issues are wrong?
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_03: Um, you know, I mean, even to like a girl was pregnant in an English class with me and she didn't want to be pregnant anymore.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_03: It was coming to that question of like, if I were her, I'd have a hard time too right now.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_03: So, like, how do I minister to her in a way that doesn't sound out of touch, but is also truly, this is a special life that you have.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_03: And why do I believe that?
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_03: Like, and it was so so then I could take that from that time in Towson and actually spend the time.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_03: And I thought I was busy.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_03: And I I really thought I didn't have time.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_03: And now I look back and I'm so thankful and I see the amount of time I had.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and I feel like right now, in that like whole farming scenario, I'm very much just like, I read a few verses, but I can't focus because of having kids and all that.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_03: And so I'm so thankful that I can like come across the study that I did.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_03: Um, one of the verses that meant so much to me was in Psalm 62, where he says, Pour out your heart before me.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_03: And like, what does that actually mean as a single?
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_03: Like, how do we do that?
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_03: Because I feel like all of these verses you hear, but until you take them your own and you claim them and you you learn how to draw near to God.
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_03: That was another verse.
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_03: Like all these people were like, this is your time to draw near to God.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_03: What does that actually mean?
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_03: Like, how do I do that?
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_03: And so learning, like, oh, I can talk to the Lord as I drive all the way up to church or to school.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_03: I I worked at the same place that you went to church.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_03: But like, it was so important to me.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_03: And looking back, I feel like a lot of what I did then in my singleness was head knowledge and I needed it.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_03: Like I needed actual truth of who God was.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_03: And now as a mom, I feel a nearness to him that I didn't necessarily have, not because I'm a mom, but because I did that work.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_03: And it's like, wow, I actually have a relationship with him and I'm seeing a different side of him because of knowing who he is now.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_03: And that's been really special.
• 10:36
  SPEAKER_03: So I wouldn't trade my singleness.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_03: Um if they're singles listening, they're like, yeah, right.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_03: Like, of course you wouldn't trade, you're saying that because you're married now.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_03: And that's what's so hard.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_03: Because you can't promise someone that they're going to get married after.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_03: But looking back, I'm very thankful for it.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_01: Um What do you think you learned about yourself during that time?
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_03: Um what did I learn about myself?
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_03: I think I learned simple things like I like plans, but I'm not a planner.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_03: Like I where I like to plan them, it's kind of backwards, but I don't always follow the plan.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_03: But fully relying on God for the plan.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_03: So, like, for example, I would read the end of a book.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_03: If I got to a if I'm reading, I love to read.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_03: If I got to a moment of like pure frustration with the character, I would read the end.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_03: Because it's like, I need to know that these two people end up together, or if they don't, sh the main character's happy, right?
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_03: That's very much me.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_03: And so I constantly would ask the Lord, like, can I just know his name?
• 11:48
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 11:48
  SPEAKER_03: Or, like, if you've given me the gift of singleness, can you just tell me that?
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_03: I just want the end game.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I will, I will serve you and I'm here for this.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I'm ready to do work for you.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_03: But I just want to know what the end looks like.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_03: Just want to know the end, like, so that I can plan my life.
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_03: Like, do I buy a house?
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_03: Do I stay?
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_03: Like, right, right?
• 12:09
  unknown: Yeah.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_03: And so that was very much an learning that I don't know and I'm not going to know.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_03: Now, I can't say that I really learned it all the way because I'm still like that.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I still would have it was something that unfortunately a fault that I saw about myself of words.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_03: Like, ugh.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_03: I think I got better, but I don't think I've like ever.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_01: I think we always will be working and growing.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_01: And there's probably things like that.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I'm like that too, where it's gonna be something.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_01: It's better to be aware of it and work on it.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_03: And that's something that I've been working on.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_03: But definitely in singleness, that kept coming to a like, especially Sundays.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know, do you I don't know if you find Sundays difficult.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_03: I found Sundays, Sundays the most difficult of the week.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_03: Why were you telling me about that before?
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_03: Because it was just like like you would I loved the worship time.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_03: I loved learning about the Lord, I loved the sermons, and I would come away blessed.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_03: But then you stand up and everybody has somebody but me.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_03: Mm-hmm.
• 13:10
  SPEAKER_03: Not to quote the Hunter He sung, but you know, like just felt so lonely.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_03: And then you'd go home, and then I'd be fine once I got back to work because I was with my fourth graders.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I was happy.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_03: But I don't know, I found Sundays to be the hardest.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_03: So it was like a weekly cycle for me where I'd be like, oh, here we go again.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_01: And then learning that when you met Matt, what was it that made it feel so like this is it?
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_03: Um so one of the things that I had learned from the previous like short relationship that was in, my brother-in-law had sat down next to me and he's like, Natalie, when it's your guy, you and him are gonna make it work.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_03: Like he's not going to be okay with being 3,000 miles away from you.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_03: And that's how far across the country is.
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but you know, like he will move.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_03: Like, and and you will want to move too.
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_03: Like it's and I remember within the first week of talking to Matt, I made the very like, I was like, I don't want to move.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I don't and he's like, Great, I like you.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_03: If if if you're the one for me, I'm I'll move.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_03: And I just remember being like, like, this is earth-shattering.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_03: But he was so willing.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_03: And little did I know, he didn't he loves, he's very close to his family, his family.
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_03: It's not for lack of love for them.
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_03: Um, he loves and respects that we love them still.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_03: But he was like, he just wanted to get married and he knew that this was what God was calling him.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_03: And you know, he was excited to come a little further.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_03: He's from New York, so he was excited to move a little south.
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_03: He dates winters, so you know, it helped.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_03: You know, if I was in Canada, it might have not been, he might not.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_03: No, I'm just kidding.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_03: But I knew that that was the thing that was like, oh.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_03: And the other thing for Matt was that I changed my perspective in that he was really good with kids.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_03: And I loved a lot of the guys that I had talked to, they were just awkward, not not that's the wrong word, not awkward as in like if they didn't know how to talk to kids, but like they weren't sure they really wanted a family.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and if they did, they had really bought into the whole, we need to wait five years.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm like, Five years?
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_03: I'm like barely like we gotta get this going if we're gonna have more than one kid, right?
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_03: And Matt was like, Yeah, let's go.
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I'm ready to I'm ready to start a family.
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_03: And he loved, you know, he loved my nieces.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_03: My youngest niece at the time was five, and I remember her going, Can I marry him?
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_03: And I was like, Oh, she likes him.
• 15:46
  SPEAKER_03: And I assume the funny thing was is as we got closer to the wedding, I got cold feet of like, I haven't known like all the facts.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_03: So fast, I haven't known this guy for a year.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_03: Like, what if he randomly moves me somewhere?
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_03: Like, what are we gonna do if after I'm married?
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I don't know.
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_03: What if he turns into somebody different?
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_03: And those were all fears I didn't need to worry about because he stayed this, you know, a same good guy.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_01: But and you guys have been married for how long now?
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_01: We'll be six years in July.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_02: So yeah.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_01: So did you feel peace like immediately up until the cold feet moment, or was it a process of feeling?
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_01: Was it a process?
• 16:23
  SPEAKER_03: I had to.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_03: I wish Matt were here for this section because if you if he were on camera, everybody would see it.
• 16:30
  SPEAKER_03: Um, he is the most extroverted, jubilant, happy person you've ever met.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_03: Like literally a golden retriever in a person.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_03: Uh-huh.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_03: And you can't help but love him, like when you see him.
• 16:43
  SPEAKER_03: And I was so worried that there was something more that I was missing.
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_03: And so I can't tell you how many times my sisters or my parents would be like, Why?
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_03: Like, what are you nervous about?
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm like, I'm just waiting for the shoe to drop.
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_03: Literally.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_03: And just wait, because it always happens, yes.
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_03: And all my friends had always had somebody like they'd like, you know, and then something, you know.
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_03: Exactly.
• 17:09
  SPEAKER_03: And I feel like I was just waiting and waiting.
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_03: And it it never dropped, which was good.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_03: But it was it was that nerves there.
• 17:18
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 17:18
  SPEAKER_03: I can't actually say, like, I knew, as weird as this sounds, I knew it was God's will.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_03: But I was nervous about it at the same time, even though I fully loved this person too.
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_03: So I realize that's kind of a dichotomy of like thought process, but it really was a little bit confusing.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_03: Um that makes sense.
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_03: And then once we got married, it was like, oh, I was like so worried about this.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_03: Like I shouldn't have been, but I'm I don't know.
• 17:46
  SPEAKER_03: The the logical side of me is very large.
• 17:48
  SPEAKER_03: And I just I, you know, I'm not somebody who's like swept off my feet easily.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_03: So I kind of didn't want that feeling of like, oh I wanted it to all make sense.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_03: And it worked some of it didn't because it was so fast.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_03: That makes sense.
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_01: I'm kind of the other way.
• 18:05
  SPEAKER_01: Like I get swept off my feet like easily.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_01: So I have to be I like have learned that I have to be more cautious.
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_01: Which I have learned through past relationships with the fact that I let myself get swept off my seat and then the other shoe drops, and I'm like, and you're like, I know.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_03: But it's so true though.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_03: It's what happens.
• 18:23
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_03: And I don't know.
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_03: And you're just waiting, but right.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_01: Hey you guys, it's me again.
• 18:31
  SPEAKER_01: Don't worry, I'll be right back with our guests.
• 18:33
  SPEAKER_01: I just wanted to take a moment and say thank you so much for spending time with us today.
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_01: I hope you're enjoying the episode so far.
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_01: Let's sit and think about what might have been said that can relate to your life today.
• 18:46
  SPEAKER_01: And if you're enjoying it, make sure you like, subscribe, follow, comment, all the things.
• 18:53
  SPEAKER_01: You can find us on YouTube for such a time as this with Bethany Garner, or you can find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.
• 19:01
  SPEAKER_01: All right, let's get back to them.
• 19:04
  SPEAKER_01: When you met him, did you feel like ready for marriage at the time, or did your readiness to get married like grow throughout the relationship?
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_03: I did feel ready.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_03: Um and it got more and more as we, you know, got to know each other.
• 19:18
  SPEAKER_03: He moved in April.
• 19:19
  SPEAKER_03: So once he moved, because it was COVID, so we couldn't travel at all.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and that was even weird because we couldn't even go on dates.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_03: Like we were excited when he came down to actually be able to like he could pick me up and we could, but even then we couldn't do that.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_03: So I did feel ready partially because I was just, I don't know, I was at a good place in my spiritual life, physically, like I was just ready.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_03: I think.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_03: I wish I would have known how to cook a little bit more.
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_03: That's what I'm working on right now.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_02: That was one thing.
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, we we survived.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_00: But it wasn't like horrible meals, but you knew in your head you could do better.
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_00: I could do better.
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm like, I should have worked less.
• 19:59
  SPEAKER_00: But he's so like his energy is so bubbly.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_00: He was like, this is awesome.
• 20:02
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, just out there.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_00: He was like, You did so good.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_00: This is great, mac and cheese.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_00: Like, thank you.
• 20:07
  SPEAKER_00: Actually, that's very much Matt.
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_00: You know, he's never I don't think he's ever complained about a dinner.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_00: He's just that's just not who he is, which is really good for me.
• 20:15
  SPEAKER_00: Really good.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, I feel that.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_01: What um what surprised you most about marriage that you like weren't expecting?
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_05: Hmm.
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_03: This is embarrassing, but how selfish I was.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't realize how much work I had to do in my sanctification or that the Lord was doing on me.
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_03: I had to learn that preference isn't the same thing as doing something wrong.
• 20:41
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I might prefer it this way.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_03: But that doesn't actually mean that it's wrong if he does it the other way.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_03: And I found that because he was so easy to eat along with, I could steamroll him rather easily because I can be an in-charge person.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_03: And then I remember one day he was doing the dishes, which was so sweet.
• 21:01
  SPEAKER_03: And instead of being thankful that he was loading the dishwasher, I'm like, Why are you doing it that way?
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_03: Why are you why are you loading the dishwasher?
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_03: Well, it turns out he got so many more dishes in a dishwasher than I, and he was doing it way better.
• 21:13
  SPEAKER_03: And I remember just my mom sitting at her kitchen table and her saying, Do you think you do everything right?
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_03: Like, do you honestly think you don't make mistakes?
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_03: And it wasn't a like sarcastic question.
• 21:24
  SPEAKER_03: It wasn't genuine, honest question, like Natalie, do you make mistakes?
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_03: And I I didn't like the answer.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_03: Because I'm like, but I don't think I make as many mistakes.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_03: Like, and then it was realizing, oh, just because I prefer you to fold a towel that way doesn't mean it's bad.
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_03: And that selfishness is something that made the first year of our marriage hard.
• 21:47
  SPEAKER_03: But also I'm really thankful that we had that and that I kind of just like got in the trenches and dealt with it because we had a baby in May.
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_03: So like we got married in July, had a baby in May.
• 21:59
  unknown: So
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_03: My selfishness had to I mean, the sacrifice you do in motherhood is huge.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_03: And so it was like, now I don't really care.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_03: Now it's like, thank you for doing the dishes.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_03: I don't care if you run a load with two things in it.
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_03: Just make them go away, you know?
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_03: So it's amazing how that changed.
• 22:16
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 22:16
  SPEAKER_01: What did you have to unlearn about your expectations going in?
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_03: Kind of like what we just talked about.
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_03: It's just he's not gonna be.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_03: I think I very had these high visions of like a man being a leader and being like this, like what I thought male leadership looked like spiritually.
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm starting to even now, like, eve I still realize that he's still being a spiritual leader by showing up every day.
• 22:48
  SPEAKER_03: And by his kind, no, I mean he does the other things, but I remember in the beginning, I thought he needed to be like, okay, let's do a Bible study, or like, and I'm not saying that's bad, right?
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_03: But that's not everybody's personality.
• 23:00
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 23:01
  SPEAKER_03: And him talking to me about what he learned in his Bible study is still leading me.
• 23:07
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_03: Where it's it's not as like organized as I wanted it.
• 23:12
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and so that was something that I really had to change what I thought.
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_03: I had a I had a bad vision of what I thought, not bad wrong, right of my expectation for that.
• 23:23
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 23:24
  SPEAKER_03: Um I also thought that like married people just like got along all the time.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_03: And I didn't realize how it does take a lot of work.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_03: It's fun work.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_03: Like we enjoy each other's company, but there is times where you're like, oh, okay, we actually have to sit down and get this figured out.
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you know, yeah, that makes sense.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_01: Were there things?
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_01: Um, this might play into what we already just talked about, were were there things that you thought that marriage would like fix, then it didn't fix for sure.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_03: You know, in singleness where you just have that desire to belong, and you have this desire for that person to fill every hole.
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_03: And I had to come to grips with that when God created us, he made a shape, a God-shape hole that he can only fill.
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_03: And although my husband can help me in a lot of things, he is not God.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_03: And I found that my Bible reading, my time with the Lord slowed when I got married because I was throwing so much time at the marriage.
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_03: And then it was like, oh, he can't be everything to me.
• 24:41
  SPEAKER_03: Like he can't uh fulfill everything that I've ever wanted, is human and sinful too.
• 24:47
  SPEAKER_03: And that really helped me with the whole idea of my identity.
• 24:53
  SPEAKER_03: Because I had to learn that my identity is in Christ.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_03: And I had learned that in a way when single, right?
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_03: But then it was like a whole new because I had to quit teaching, and very much my identity was being Miss Myers.
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_03: Like that was my life, and I loved it and I was good at it, and I had found my niche.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_03: And then I marry this guy, and he's like, I'd really like you to stay home with my kids, which is what I wanted.
• 25:20
  SPEAKER_03: Like that's what I wanted.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_03: But then once I came home, it was like, well, who am I now?
• 25:25
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I'm not Miss Myers, and there's no like where's that feedback that I needed?
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_03: And so finding Matt in my relationship with Christ was hard because I expected Matt to fulfill it.
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_03: And he wasn't going to.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_01: And so now you're a wife and a mom.
• 25:45
  SPEAKER_01: And so, how did motherhood like stretch your capacity emotionally, spiritually?
• 25:51
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_03: Motherhood for me is the best thing that ever happened to me.
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_03: Um, like, I don't want to gush, but it is just I don't identify with people, not saying that they're they're not correct for them, but for me, if it just was the answer to so many years of prayer.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_03: When I was single, I had a phrase that I would tell people, like, I don't need the man, I just want the orphanage.
• 26:21
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I just want the kids.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_03: It's I've always known that I wanted to be a mom, and I didn't know how I was gonna get there.
• 26:28
  SPEAKER_03: So that's why I was like, maybe I just need to adopt.
• 26:30
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I'll foster.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_03: I'll and so being a mom to me has been just such an answer to prayer and so many things.
• 26:37
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I learned that I really do need my husband through all of it because I can't do it by myself, but it's been really good.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_03: How has it stretched me in every way possible?
• 26:49
  SPEAKER_03: Uh-huh.
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_03: Like just every way.
• 26:51
  SPEAKER_03: Like at 24, if you would have asked me to can you pull an all-nighter, I would have said, no way.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_03: That has never been me.
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_03: I like sleep and I like to sleep in.
• 27:01
  SPEAKER_03: And now, I mean, I don't know the last time I sleep through the night, just because with I have three kids, and they all, and they're all good sleepers.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_03: That's the thing.
• 27:10
  SPEAKER_03: But they all randomly need something.
• 27:11
  SPEAKER_03: You know, like you're working on something, or somebody's getting a tooth, or and so physically it's stretching.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I would say my oldest is five, and she's just beginning this thing where she's like asking a lot of really good questions.
• 27:25
  SPEAKER_03: And so it's suddenly now stretching me, also like spiritually, of like, how do I help her understand how good God is?
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_03: Like he is better than anything she could ever want.
• 27:38
  SPEAKER_03: But how do you get that on a five-year-old level and understand the depth of what God has done for her?
• 27:44
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 27:44
  SPEAKER_03: And that he died and rose, and um, and you just so want them to understand it.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_03: And you want them to like grasp it for themselves and make it personal, but you know that that's a work of the Holy Spirit.
• 27:56
  SPEAKER_03: So you also have to, but so that's been my new thing in just even in the last couple of months of like really praying, like, Lord, give me the right answers for some of these questions.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_03: You know, even like when there's an animal dead on the road, she has such a tender heart.
• 28:11
  SPEAKER_03: And it's like, but why did God let the animal die?
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_03: And learning how, you know, all these experienced moms are gonna be like, Natalie, you just say this.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_03: But even for me, learning how, like, how do I answer this and not just like ah it's the food chain, you know, but more, you know what I mean?
• 28:24
  SPEAKER_03: Like, yeah, in a way that actually really meets her question.
• 28:27
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_03: So that's what I'm learning right now.
• 28:30
  SPEAKER_01: How do you how do you like make sure you're taking care of yourself and getting rest and all the things on top of being a mom?
• 28:39
  SPEAKER_03: I I think there's a season for that.
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_03: And I don't know that I'm in that season if I'm being honest.
• 28:44
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 28:45
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I find a lot of fulfillment in being needed, which is what was hard in single, in being single.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_03: So I get a lot of fulfillment in my kids wanting to be with me, in them needing me.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_03: Um when I'm not pregnant, I love a cup of coffee and I actually like getting up early, which seems to be, you know, counter what you'd expect.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_03: But I like getting up when the house is quiet and I can read or I can put on music or whatever.
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_03: Um also I love to bake.
• 29:17
  SPEAKER_03: So for me, like baking bread where I can just kind of like zone in and and so that's kind of like self-care in some ways.
• 29:25
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I used to love to get my nails done.
• 29:27
  SPEAKER_03: I don't do that anymore, but it's interesting how you like adapt, you know what I mean?
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_03: And you like find ways.
• 29:34
  SPEAKER_03: Um that makes sense.
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_03: So yeah, my husband's really good at helping me be like, hey, I think you should go to Target by yourself.
• 29:41
  SPEAKER_03: And that's like, oh, okay.
• 29:43
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I can do that.
• 29:44
  SPEAKER_03: And so it looks different for me.
• 29:46
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and I think the past me would be like, that's enough.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_03: But it could it is in some weird way.
• 29:54
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_01: What do you wish that more single women understood about marriage and kids?
• 30:03
  SPEAKER_03: Uh I wish I more single women knew that Christ is enough.
• 30:13
  SPEAKER_03: Christ is enough.
• 30:15
  SPEAKER_03: And it doesn't feel like that all the time.
• 30:17
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and when you're looking at bills that aren't paid and you need two incomes, and you're wondering, you know, there's big decisions when you're single.
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_03: I don't think I don't think married people who have never been single understand that.
• 30:29
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 30:30
  SPEAKER_03: That's something that yeah.
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_03: I also wish women understood in particular that it's okay to feel that desire to want to get married.
• 30:40
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 30:41
  SPEAKER_03: But you're not broken if people other men don't see you as marriage material.
• 30:45
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 30:46
  SPEAKER_03: I I for so long just kept saying, I'm not enough.
• 30:49
  SPEAKER_03: Like for this guy, I didn't go to the right school.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_03: And for this guy, I wasn't skinny enough, and for this, and I would get all of these excuses, but then realizing, like studying Ephesians through that book of it's not about me.
• 31:02
  SPEAKER_03: It's all about Christ and what he's already done.
• 31:05
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 31:05
  SPEAKER_03: And I get to find fulfillment.
• 31:07
  SPEAKER_03: And is that a daily laying down that like, well, yes, absolutely.
• 31:12
  SPEAKER_03: But I I wish more women and men, but could come to that of like, yep, it's not about me, it's all about Christ.
• 31:20
  SPEAKER_03: And if I can find a work in his kingdom to do, that would be my next thing.
• 31:25
  SPEAKER_03: Like find a church to plug into or a ministry of some sort that you really love and that you can come home tired, you know, knowing that you've worked hard, I would highly recommend.
• 31:40
  SPEAKER_01: What um character traits or habits did God build in you during your singleness that are still helping you today?
• 31:49
  SPEAKER_03: Um some of it I had to relearn.
• 31:57
  SPEAKER_03: Um I had to learn how to be spontaneous.
• 32:00
  SPEAKER_03: That was something that in singleness I loved.
• 32:02
  SPEAKER_03: I loved being able to just kind of, I'm not a big like, let me go here, but I loved by being spontaneous, like, I'm off work, I'm gonna go to Starbucks and get a coffee and yes go to Target or whatever.
• 32:14
  SPEAKER_03: And I loved that felt fun to me.
• 32:17
  SPEAKER_03: I find that in marriage that has helped a lot with children.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_03: Um because you have you there's just some things you just can't be rigid about with kids.
• 32:29
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 32:30
  SPEAKER_03: Um spiritually, I mean, we probably already covered that, but just really learning about who God is has really helped me because I don't have the time now to spend hours studying.
• 32:43
  SPEAKER_03: And I love that those habits, you know, like are carrying me through still.
• 32:50
  SPEAKER_01: Mm-hmm.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_01: What would you say to someone that's feeling behind in life because they're still single and they're in their late 20s?
• 33:02
  SPEAKER_03: I would say that the God that you serve is not just a God of everywhere, but he's a God of everyone.
• 33:08
  SPEAKER_03: So the God of tomorrow is literally the God of today.
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_03: He's already at tomorrow.
• 33:15
  SPEAKER_03: He's already at five years from now.
• 33:18
  SPEAKER_03: And so when he's making you right now, as he's building you and and molding you, he's molding you for the future because he's already there.
• 33:27
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 33:28
  SPEAKER_03: I always struggled a little bit when, you know, in Lamentations, when he says his mercies are new every morning, I would often say, like, how do you know you're gonna get me through?
• 33:36
  SPEAKER_03: Because I need them all the way till, you know, 12, right?
• 33:39
  SPEAKER_03: It's like, how does the Lord actually know?
• 33:41
  SPEAKER_03: Because he's already at tomorrow.
• 33:43
  SPEAKER_03: He literally knows what tomorrow, not just in knowledge, but he's there and he's living it.
• 33:49
  SPEAKER_03: So he can give me what I need.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 33:53
  SPEAKER_03: And I I wish I understood that all of the things he was building in me as a teacher, I can use with my kids and my spouse.
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_03: And I don't know that I necessarily got that back then.
• 34:04
  SPEAKER_03: Because it kind of felt like all I was doing was teaching math, history, and English.
• 34:08
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 34:10
  SPEAKER_01: What would you say anything different to someone who just thinks that God's forgotten about them?
• 34:18
  SPEAKER_03: Um I think it's easy to get there when you're single.
• 34:23
  SPEAKER_03: Um because every time you open up social media, you see another announcement for, you know, as you get older, it's like it used to be dating, and then it's marriage, and then it's babies, and it's just like, where am I?
• 34:37
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but he does see you and he chose you before the foundation of the world, and he's called you.
• 34:44
  SPEAKER_03: Um if God sent his own son to die on the cross for you, he's not gonna forget you.
• 34:51
  SPEAKER_03: And and sometimes it's not letting yourself get lost in the emotion, but coming back to the fact that I've been bought with a price.
• 35:00
  SPEAKER_03: My savior paid for me.
• 35:04
  SPEAKER_03: And therefore, he hasn't forgotten me.
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_03: And that's hard.
• 35:08
  SPEAKER_03: But sometimes you really have to put the emotions away and just be factual of like he hasn't.
• 35:14
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's good.
• 35:15
  SPEAKER_01: Yep.
• 35:16
  SPEAKER_01: All right, last question for you.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_01: If you could go back and tell your single self something, what would you tell her?
• 35:26
  SPEAKER_03: There's nothing wasted that God starts.
• 35:28
  SPEAKER_03: Your waiting isn't wasted, your singleness isn't wasted, your time's not wasted.
• 35:35
  SPEAKER_03: Even, you know, your service for the Lord's not wasted.
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_03: All of it he can use and he is using.
• 35:41
  SPEAKER_03: And yeah, your time is not wasted.
• 35:44
  SPEAKER_03: It's not like, oh, let me just wait till my life begins at my age.
• 35:49
  SPEAKER_03: I I can use he's using it now.
• 35:50
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 35:51
  SPEAKER_01: Yay! Thank you so much, Natalie, for coming.
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_01: I appreciate you.
• 35:55
  SPEAKER_01: Skazy so good.
• 35:56
  SPEAKER_01: You too.
• 35:57
  SPEAKER_01: All right, bye guys.
• 35:58
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you guys so much for spending time with us today.
• 36:01
  SPEAKER_01: I really loved having you here.
• 36:03
  SPEAKER_01: If you liked this episode, make sure you share it with someone you know.
• 36:07
  SPEAKER_01: I'd also love if you guys would comment any questions you might have that we can answer on future episodes.
• 36:12
  SPEAKER_01: Remember that each one of you was born for such a time as this.
• 36:17
  SPEAKER_01: Until next time.
• 36:18
  SPEAKER_01: Bye.