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Finding Your Purpose After Significant Life Changes | 010 · The Midlife Pivot

• The Midlife Pivot Podcast: Welcome everybody. This week, I guess, Mom, we are going to bring it back to just the two of us. We have had another two incredible guests the last two weeks, with our incredible episode with Alyssa Steinberg, our nutritionist. and then last week with Karen Rosenberg, which was unbelievable. Also, also, we've been so fortunate because we really have had. phenomenal guests on the show. but what's the purpose of the show and why did we, you know, why did we start the podcast? Was talking about where you and I were, how you and I have pivoted in life, what we've kind of done. And I think people want to hear that. I've I've been getting messages about, all right, Amanda, we want to hear about you. so I think this week what we want to do is just, just talk a little bit about where we're at in in life. And you really have come a long way. It's been a year now since your separation. And how do you feel now? Because I remember when we first started the podcast, you came here and you said, It didn't seem as if you had a purpose. There wasn't anything that you really wanted to talk about, or I wouldn't say you were sad. You must have been a little sad, but at the same time I was devastated. But at the same time You have that voice. And it's so important because you're a comfort to people the same way as all the guests that we have to date, you've got something to offer. So tell Avita. Yeah, you know, look, we we are a year down the road. And I think one of the reasons again why we decided to do this was because I did want to find some purpose. And I did want to be a voice. for people that are and and there are you know Oprah Oprah Winfrey did an amazing podcast a couple a couple months ago maybe even was a year ago about gray divorce and and women that are in their midlife and how they manage suddenly being empty nesters and then their marriage fizzles out. and it it was a huge pivot for me. It was definitely something that I had to adjust myself. to get comfortable with. And it's been it was a it was a tough year, but last week did mark a year since, excuse the pun, did mark did did mark a year since since Mike and I separated. And you know, Mom, it's interesting because I I had a birthday last month and there was some the the Jewish holidays happened I was apprehensive and anxious about getting to that point. This definitely kept me grounded. This definitely gave me purpose each week to know that I was going to come back, I was going to share the the fantastic response that we got from people coming out there and sharing our stories and having these phenomenal guests on here gave me confidence to say we can keep doing this. And people want to hear what we have to say. But I have to say, for the first time this past week or so, I kind of felt my purpose for the very first time. I really didn't feel that I woke up with a pit in my stomach. I didn't feel like the sky was falling. I, you know, I come on here and I have this positive attitude, and I talk about making lemonade out of lemons, and I talk about the glass half full. But after a 35-year marriage, it's hard to make that adjustment. Look, I'm very fortunate because I have a very collaborative and amical, as you know, relationship with Mark. And please God may that last forever. Because you know, he's the father of my kids, and we grew it, we we built a beautiful life together. And I never ever take any of that for granted. So there's a sadness, for that part of, that part of it having having ended for for no, for no question about it. But I do see that light at the end of the tunnel. I think on the very first episode, I spoke about walking down the tunnel... know, you know the lights at the tunnel, but The analogy that I used was walking down the tunnel with a flashlight. that the batteries kept felt I felt like the batteries just were constantly going out, you know. I knew there was that light at the end of the tunnel. I was guiding myself with this flashlight and the batteries kept on going out. And I don't think I'm at the end of the tunnel yet, but the batteries have stayed on. And I feel that I'm kind of getting to that point where I'm gonna be okay. My kids are gonna be okay. gonna yeah, I I am gonna get emotional because it is it's a transition. It was a transition. Of course. I mean, you were married for thirty-five years. And I mean, till the breakup, even after the breakup, you are both still in love. Yeah. I mean, you can't get away from that. I mean, Mark still adores you and you still love him. And unfortunately, it was something that the reasons and the circumstances are irrelevant. We do not have to mention. No, because I'm talking about me and I want others. I want others listening who Are in marriages that just aren't right. You know, you get to a point, yes. I look at you and dad, 66 years of marriage, it's phenomenal, but you're an anomaly. You know, you are an anomaly. And even you, even you've dealt with you know with with angst over the years. And sometimes you look at me and you go, Jesus Amanda. Of course, my goodness, it hasn't been 66, almost 67 years. Of my gosh, the stars and the love, etc. I mean, your father's a wonderful man. And where I find the most that I'm grateful for is coming to America and agree, he agreed to come, you know, and I I I I'm thankful for those things. But there's lots of things that he still annoys me. It's not as if, my gosh, lovey dovey, you know. Right. But but I must say, again, the two of us are compatible and we had the same ideas. With you and Mark, it was irreconcilable differences, as they say. So yeah, yeah. But it does not mean that it's anger. There's no anger there. Right. And I look at so many people whose marriages end and there isn't that sense of just comfort, you know, as as I get ready now, you know, summer's coming to an end and I get ready to to and I'll give one example is Close up the pool. It was such an overwhelming experience for me last year. but it was something that for me, I wanted to stay in the house. It's the house my kids grew up in. I love my home. And it's overwhelming to suddenly be there on your own. And I guess my point being in sharing this is being able to say to others, listening, it is going to be okay. And you may mess up and you may make mistakes along the way. And you may, I may do things that aren't perfect. I mean, the other day a pipe burst and I was freaking out because what did I do? And who did I call? I called Mark. And thank God I'm able to do that. Yes, darling. But that's very rare. No, I know. I understand. I do understand that. But I guess my point being is that I want to give, I want to give others the perspective that it can be done. if you if you both recognize that your marriage is no longer where it needs to be, and as I used the expression last week of fizzled out, because I don't like the word failed, that being able to have a relationship with your partner that you've had for so long, there's value in it. Yes, and and I'm very fortunate for that. of course. So that's as much as I wanna, you know, as I wanna say there. But that kind of brought me to where I'm at today. This episode's you know being released on on October the 10th, 11th, 12th, which is a significant time for me. and the most significant is the fact that Erin and Kayla turned 30. my goodness. Turned 30. And again I'm probably gonna I'm gonna get teary but I wanted them so badly. And and I look now that I have these Adult children who have created such incredible lives for themselves. you know, this past week I got to so so I'm I'm sharing because obviously our listeners don't know, but Aaron made a significant pivot in his life. I think I did mention it at some point, having started his career, you know, having gone to university as a as an accounting undergrad, went on to get his master's in finance and it 23 said to me, Mom, I hate this. I I just can't imagine doing this for the rest of my life. And I looked at him and I said, you have your whole life ahead of you. Don't do it. Let's figure out what's right for you. And he went on to, it was COVID, and things were kind of changing. And I don't have to go through all the details, but basically he discovered he's always had a love for kids. He was a big camper and he loved going to camp. And He an opportunity arose where he could help facilitate in classrooms while COVID was happening and teachers weren't gonna be there. after a year, he said, Mom, I think this is what I want to do. I want to be an educator. And and you never turned up your nose. No, you turned around to him, darling. Whatever makes you happy, go for it. You can't live a life in sadness and wishing you'd done this or wishing. Go for it. You what, man? He did a little He did. And he ended up going off and getting his master's in education. And now he's this first grade teacher. And I have to tell you, having been there this past week, so this past week, he invited me to go on a their field trip, on their first grade field trip. And it happened to have been to the pumpkin patch. And I I shared it on my on my Instagram where I said, One of my girlfriends said to me, Jesus Amanda, you never used to go on their field trips when they were in school. I can't believe you're going now, but I've a I'm afforded that ability to be able to go now, not having to do anything. And I went. And to watch my son be so adored by these six and seven-year-olds. Tell them the story about the yes. my God, Mom. So he he says to me, So he's preparing the kids now. to get ready for the field trip and they're all very excited and know last the two weeks ago they were talking about chaperones and whose parents were going to be chaperones and one of the kids says no my mother's not coming and and and Erin said why and he said no you know you know I'm I'm very independent and I don't need my mother there but the cutest story was they were talking about what they can bring on the field trip. And if we were going to be there for a long time, so they had to bring their lunches. Remind me again what age. They're six, seven. They're six and seven. Okay. So they had to bring their lunches. So one of One of the little girls looks at him very seriously and says, Mr. Segal I'm I'm really concerned. You know, what about allergies?" So Aaron says, "No, that's okay. Everybody will bring their own lunches in their own lunch bag. And as you know, nobody's supposed to be sharing their foods. Everyone will, you know, keep their food to themselves." And she turned around and she said, "Well, I just really hope that no one's gonna bring any amoxicillin because you know I'm highly allergic." And Aaron said to them, said to him, "Don't worry, no one's gonna bring any ammoxicillin." But the innocence and to see how he handles it. Handles it, and how he gets a kick out of it and it makes his day was so endearing and so beautiful, and then getting to watch him interact with the kids is beyond. So, yes, going off on a tangent, but my point being is that here are these kids that I wanted so badly, and they are turning 30. And I said to Kayla just this week, I said, Kay, I said, "How's it possible that I have 30-year-olds? I'm 30." I said, "What did I conceive you? You know, did I conceive you at birth?" Because it's hard for me to picture myself being, I mean, 30, 30, I was a mother of two already, you know, and it it's crazy. So that's a huge pivotal place in my life that my my my kids are adults and and are living wonderful, you know, beautiful lives. And so with that I decided to do something. And as I said, when the podcast gets released, I will be landing in Paris. Wow. And it is something that I really wanted to do. So I am a huge Celine Dion fan, as you know. I've seen her perform in concert three times, which I feel very fortunate. And Lisa and I were supposed to go to Las Vegas to see her perform when she had her residency. And she ended up getting sick. Celine Dion ended up getting sick and she canceled her. Her performances and I was devastated because it was going to be just phenomenal. It was back when she was still at the Caesars, I think. It wasn't the sphere, wasn't She was her residency at Caesars. And when I found out, and after watching her documentary and seeing her so ill and and just sharing what you know, she'd had the stiff person syndrome and has been able to overcome it and is on the other side and decided she was going to do a comeback and was going to perform in Paris. Asked Lisa. And she couldn't commit. She was like, I don't know, I've got this going on. And I thought to myself, you know what? I can do this on my own. I mean, I've traveled for work for so I mean for 15 years I traveled for work on my own. A lot of the time was on my own. then I would, you know, go to London or Ireland or Canada and whatever. I could do this and decided that I was gonna take myself off to Paris to see Celine Dion. And on Wednesday night, I will be seeing Celine Dion. And when I get back, I will report. As to it's wonderful what I wonderful but she has been phenomenal. I mean I watch little clips on Instagram on Instagram and I see her come out and all the hundreds of people standing outside the hotel, she greets everybody, she gives them a little song, a little dance, and that is a woman. When you think about it, she is a woman of fortitude. Yeah, absolutely. And look at her, she pivoted. She lost her husband that she adored. She was so unbelievably close to him and he died of cancer. And she had a set of twins. Yes. She has her twins, her twin boys. But yes, I mean, a woman of such strength and courage. And for me to be able to stand there, ended up downloading, I got the whole set list of all the songs. A lot of them are actually in French. So I'm excited to kind of see, you know, how much I understand and what I but I downloaded the set list and have been playing it on full blast on the Sonus in the house because I'm here by myself and I'm able to do it. And Amanda, I know you so well. You are gonna have a photograph for us when you come back standing with Celine Dia. That much mom, I don't think I'm gonna be able to do. If I do that, that'll be fantastic. I know you. But but I'm really excited. I mean it so turned out that the week ended up being, I mean, it's so unbelievably how ironic things turned out. Now I did know of just the most fabulous girl who is a Peloton friend that I've known that was going to be in Paris this coming week. so I did know that she was going to be there. So when I booked my tickets, I kind of booked it around when she was gonna be there because I figured. God forbid if I needed somebody, she's going with a friend, somebody separate and she's staying. But I figured if somebody was going to be there, at least Melissa was gonna be there if I needed to reach out to someone. So we are going to the concert on the same night together. But I I don't know where she's sitting, but I'm a seat snob and I like to have good seats. I I am, I like a good seat. You rolled your eyes there. Doesn't matter. With Selindion, you can be sitting with the gods and her voice is there and she's there. You can feel the power of it. But anyway, so at least we'll go for it. We'll go for dinner beforehand. And then my friend Marnie turned around and said, my God, I'm going to be in Paris. She's going to be there with Paul and her and her boys. And then I'm telling my friend Jamie. And Jamie said, my God, Amanda, I'm coming to Paris. So we're kind of overlapping here and there, but yes, ultimately it would be, it is going to be a it is going to be a solo trip. And I do want to reference because Sunny and Jen went over the summer and they had shared an itinerary, and I've taken a lot of what they had recommended on their itinerary and recreated it. Tell me some some of that. So some of the things that they had done was they arranged this little like mini convertible is coming to pick me up, and they do a tour of Paris, and you could pick different things. I chose, I've never been, I've been to Paris. This will be my third time in Paris. actually my fourth this will be my fourth time. I've been three times before. but they do it a tour, this this company does a tour to Sacrocure and Monmaft. And I've never been. I've never been up to Monmaft or Sacrocure. So in all the in the trips that I've done. I mean, maybe I have and I have no memory, it's gonna I'm going with a fresh mind. So that's what I'm doing, which I think is going to be so fun. And they had said it was an absolute must to do. So I'm doing that. And then the other thing that they had suggested they didn't do, but it's something I've always wanted to do it. And my friend Cheryl did it, because she was in Paris this summer is w walking food tour of all the patestries. And have you? I did that. I did that when Lisa took me on my 80th birthday. 18th birthday? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No. Your 70th birthday. 10th. Whatever. 70th. 80th was Egypt. Time is flying. 80th was Egypt. It was your 70th birthday, mom. Just so long ago. Yes. And she took me and she'd arranged everything in advance. So we went to the chocolatier. Yes. And there was a lady there who actually plans this food trip. So we went to where the The place that has cheese. They took us down into the dungeons to show us how they matured the cheese. It was incredible. I think mine is just pastries and chocolate from from what I could get from what I could get. but it's like it's a like the whole morning. So you pretty much start at ten and you go to I'm sure they're included. Maybe. And you we ended up at the very end, the guide who had taken us. had a friend who was a chef in one of the little boutiques restaurants there. And it was lovely. We had wine and we had something to eat and it was really lovely. Yeah. So I'm excited about that. So I've arranged I've arranged to do those. So they're the two things that Celine and the the tour to Sacracour and Monmaft everybody apparently goes to Paris and brings back butter. I mean that's the thing to do. So I have to bring back butter. Yes, there's herbed butter and garlic butter and they vacuum pack it and freeze it. and I'm staying in an Airbnb. I chose to stay in an Airbnb because I felt once I was going on my own, I wanted to like feel like I was in Paris, that I could wake up in the morning and go and get my coffee and a and a croissant and or I could get my baguette. And I just wanted to do it. And I found this beautiful Airbnb. I hope it's beautiful. It's right opposite the opposite the Pompidou. Wow. So it's in a great location. And I'll figure my way around. Of course. And you know, and do what I have to do. So it's there. You are Amanda. You need to say you need to say, my darling. my darling. You are Amanda. This is that. but yes, so so that is going to be a ton of fun and I'm really looking forward to it. And I I, you know, my first trip to Paris, I'm gonna share the story, talking about pivots. My first trip to Paris. yeah. was right out of high school. yes. Right? yes. And so that trip was with girlfriends. I had gone gave you a gift. Yep. My gift for go to Europe. My gift for gr for graduating high school, which I had you on the edge of your seat thinking that I wasn't gonna graduate. I was a terrible student. but here I am today. And I'm okay. Let me tell them how terrible you were. While you were away, I had to pack away all your books from school First of all, I went and I had a look at the school and you know your grades and everything, and you were fantastic. You passed everything. It was fantastic. And I sat there and I said to your father, How did she do that? She never opened her books. I I went to get your books together. You know how you open a book and you open it and it's wrenched open. You're giving away what As I opened them so they closed. So as I opened them, so they closed. What you did? There you go. Look at you too. I don't advocate what you did. No, I don't advocate what I did either. I was a terrible student. Don't advocate what you did. But yes, I you're very special that way, and that's the way. It was what we did in those days. It was one of these bus coach bus tours. And you traveled all around Europe. We started in London, got on the bus, and we went off to, I think we took the ferry to Paris, the bass picked us up in Paris and off we went. Very first stop on the trip. And we had, I think it was 12 stops for the month. We were gone for a month. And Paris was the very first stop. And you had said to me, Amanda, when you're in Paris. You have to go to Gallery Lafayette, and you have to get me my Clarence moisturizer. But when you go, you get the VAT back or the tax back there, whatever it was. And off I go. We had spent the two days in Paris. That night we were supposed to go up the Eiffel Tower, and I go to Gallery Lafayette in the afternoon with the girls, and I go and find your Clarence. And I go now to show my passport so that I can get the VAT back. And because back in those days, you got it right back in the in the store. You didn't have to wait to go to the airport or whatever. And we talking many, many years ago. 39 to be exact, which is just bizarre to me. Anyway, off I go, I get that. That night we're getting ready to go up the Eiffel Tower. And the tour guide says, Everybody, make sure that you've put your passports away and that you've got everything. And I look for my passport, and my passport is nowhere to be found. I cannot find my passport. I remember. And I am freaking out, freaking out about where's my passport. Anyway, the girls are like, Do you want us to stay? I said, No, no, no, just go, just go. And I think Fiona may have stayed back with me. I can't remember. I think it was Fiona. Either Carol or Fiona ended up staying back with me. And looked, we looked for this passport. We could not find this passport. Just for that night. Couldn't find the passport. Well, the tour was leaving the next morning and going on to the next destination. And Jamie was our tour guide. And he said to me, He said, Listen, Amanda, he said, this is where we're gonna be for the next three, you know, three stops. Beyond that, I don't think it's advisable for you to join us. Needless to say, I was on a South African passport in those days, and you needed a visa for every country we were going to. So it wasn't just a question of having your passport. You had to have had a stamped visa from the consulates in your passport for every place we were going to. That morning they end up getting ready to go. And I do believe that Fiona was the one that said to me, I'll stay, I'll stay. And I'm like, no, you've paid for this trip. Are you not staying with me? I'm fine. I'll be fine. I spoke French. I said I'll be fine. You guys go and off they go. And there I am. 18 years old on my own in Paris and I go to Gallery Lafayette and I think let me start there. I'm gonna start at Gallery Lafayette. I'm gonna see if I dropped it there, and if I haven't got it there, then I'll retrace my steps. And off I go, kind of very long story short. I'm sitting outside a cafe because I get there at like eight o'clock in the morning, and of course it doesn't open until 10. And I go in and in my very broken French, I ask them if anyone go back to the counter and ask them if anyone had found a passport. Oui, madame. Oui, oui, oui. Or, mademoiselle, oui, oui. We found your passport. like, okay, can I have it? And they're like, no, it went to lost and found. No. And I'm like, okay. So I said, please, just my French is terrible. Please can you just take me to Lost and Found? Anyway, a lovely woman took me and off I go. And I get there and she says to me, You have to show me identification. I'm like, you have my identification. Anyway, I got my passport back. I mean, there is a God and he watches over me and that I have never questioned everything. I then pick my passport up. I go back to the hotel and I'm like, yeah, baby, off we go. And the bus had gone on to a winery, a wine farm, and then they were gonna stay at a chateau. And they expected me 18 that find your own. But no, they didn't think I never thought I was gonna arrive there at all. Anyway, off I go, I take my luggage, and now I have to go to the station. And I go to Garadeleon and it has to we have to stop. It's it isn't a direct train, so I have to stop. And you just have to smile, your big pearly whites, and everybody helps you. And people help me, and on the train they helped me. And then I get to the little village where this chateau was going to be. And I arrive there, a very nice gentleman, a taxi picks me up and is now going to take me to the chateau. And of course, I am like the whole way there, telling him he spoke English. Also, he's broken English and my broken French. And I'm telling him the story on the way to the chateau. By the time I got there, he was like, I go, What do I? You goes, no, no, no. You've kept me entertained. You don't owe me anything. He gave me a free ride from the station to the chateau. I arrived there before the tour bus gets there. And there I am when the tour bus arrives. I'm standing on the porch of the chateau waving to everybody as I've now arrived. And they were like, How the heck did you get here before I did? And yeah, so I think I'm gonna be okay in Paris on my own, Mom. my darling. I think I'm gonna be okay. Of course you are. I mean, that is it is a cool story, and it is just a fun memory. I mean, my my memories of Paris are very vague. I did go back with Mark and friends back in 2013, and we had a fabulous time. And then the year later, I actually took Kayla on an overnight to Paris. She had come with me to London for work, and I surprised her, it was her graduation present. And she had not gone on her senior trip after school because she wanted to go with me to London. And I took her to Paris. We took the she didn't know. We took the train and we spent the night in Paris and we did, you know, and again, my memories are so vague. and I I was just looking back, talk about my weight up and down. my god, Mom, I was huge when we went there. I mean, 2013 I was probably at one of my my largest that I but you know what, my darling I might have been at your largest, but you were having fun. We had fun. We had fun. We did the best time. You can't make weight a lifetime thing. I know. I know it's important to be healthy. As long as you're healthy and you're exercising and you're doing the stuff you're doing. Yes. You know, I think it's fantastic. Healthy now. Absolutely. And this top is horrible. It makes me look huge, but that's okay. But people, you know, sometimes people today you have so much help. Well, today I'm gonna go on my pat my my patisserie tour and I'm gonna eat whatever I want and I'm gonna enjoy myself and when I come back I will get back on my Alyssa Steinberg and Halley Francis program. That's because of course my nutritionist is Halle Francis. Let me tell you, my sweetheart, that while you're there, you are gonna walk so I know, I know. That Peloton won't even be in your way in your sphere. Are we doing are we doing Peloton walks wherever I go in my in my Because I'm in your 'cause I'll be on my own. And I'll be able to I will because then that weekend. So I'm in Paris Monday through Friday and then I'm taking the train from Paris to London. Yeah. And I am meeting friends in London and we are doing it is our it is John Huskings five year Peliversary. So he'll he's been with Peliversary. I know he's been with Peloton for five years and we're doing a big takeover in the studio. We're doing a big takeover. So we so basically we take over the studio and members get invited and we do this and it's all in celebration, you know, for John. So I'm going to be yeah, we're gonna be doing that. We have I'm gonna see I'm gonna see my my doctor friends. So I'm really excited. I've made arrangements to see them. please God, I'll get to see Claudia and and the family and and Marnie's going to be I have tons of friends that are gonna be there that weekend. So I'm really excited. So a couple classes. I have a couple classes on Saturday and and and so Saturday I've got cycling classes with Bradley Rose. On my on Sunday I've got the walk with John and then I've got another s another cycle class with Sam Yo. So I'm excited. And then Monday I come back. And you come back. So so yes, so you'll miss me, but I'll be back. Before you know it. It's okay. I think I can manage your week with us. You'll manage. You know, I'll speak to you every day. So you'll get a phone call from me every day or a FaceTime. And I'll FaceTime you from wherever I am. and I'll take lots of videos of Celine and share those, and they will be all over my social media. And you'll share them with everybody. With everybody. Yes. And that is going to be so you know what? You can make lemonade out of lemons. And that is what I'm doing. And no, my sweet. I don't take, I want to just preface by saying. I don't take for granted that I'm able to do this. I I I I am very privileged and I recognize that. And I, you know, I I've racked up tons of points on Jet Blue that I was able to do that. And then I, you know that I got a I I don't think I ever told you this. You know, when I went to Toronto in the summer, the flight was overbooked. So they were asking if anybody wanted to give up their seat. Because they needed somebody had to be on the plane. And I was flying by again. I was, there's some benefits to being solo. I was flying, you know, to meet the girls in in Toronto. And I called Helen and I said, Do you care if I come in at midnight? And she was like, No, mine, of course not. I said, because I can get onto a later flight and I think they may pay me. They they did. They, and you know, me, I negotiated. They offered me $1,200. I said, Nope, that's not good enough. They ended up giving me $2,000. Really? They gave me $2,000 towards a United ticket, which I'm using to fly back from Paris. I'm actually flying from London. It was cheaper to fly from London. And that was one of the reasons I decided to go for to London. And then as as you know, I'm so everything's so serendipitous, it was the weekend of John's, you know, John's anniversary. So I thought, my God, I'm meant to be in London this weekend. So I'm gonna fly back from London. yeah, so they were kind of free tickets on both ends, which was really, which was really cool. And I'm gonna make the most of it. You know, Amanda, when you first told me that you're gonna be alone and you were so sad and sound, I said, you know, Manda, you're the type of person that makes things happen. You were sad and it was distraught and everything, but you did things, and now you've made making a new community in Washington. You've made new friends, and every time you do something, you said to me the other day, you know, mom. I'm playing mahjong. I'm being taught mahjong. Canasta. that was yes. Okay, sorry. I'm playing mahjong. I thought, wow, that's great. It's very difficult to do. She said you said, yes, you know, but I learned. And you found friends, mahjong friends, and you were playing mahjong. The next thing I hear you're saying, you know, Mom, I've got a group of friends who play canasta now. All of a sudden, you're playing canasta. I said to your father, wow, let me tell you, you have found friends left, right, and It's amazing how people come back into your life. I mean, these were girls, a lot of yes, they're new friends, but my constant has been my friend Renee, who's local. And unfortunately, she's gonna go, she's gonna head off, you know, down south for the for the winter, which is devastating. And I'm so sad that she's leaving. But she is incredibly inclusive and the most incredible friend from that perspective. And she's like, come, you're coming with me. We're gonna do this. Let's go and do a class. And yeah, and and just making the most of it. You're doing things that sometimes I say to some, you're I can't believe what Amanda's doing now. You know, I pivoted, I pivoted from Marjorie to canasta and I'm loving it. There's so many rules though. There are there are a lot of rules. We're learning, we're learning to It's very sad that you haven't gone on to bridge. No. Because then I would be able to I can teach you canasta. No. Okay, no, no. Not at all. No, not at 85. I'm doing, as you know, Spanish. I know. Eight years of Spanish, you habla español. I'm doing painting. Eight years of painting. I know. And everyone got to see them last week if they listened to the show. No, they were amazing. I don't know. I do want to clarify though, those were not the paintings though that you had given Erin. Those were some of the ones that that Scott, our producer, asked for that and they're amazing. And I've gotten so many people go, my god, she paints as well. Like seriously. When I pivoted, that's when I did it. You did. I pivoted and I thought, now what am I gonna do with my life? Yeah, there we go. I took hold. Yeah. All right. Well I think we're gonna wrap it up. It was good. Well good I feel cathartic having just shared all of that. You know what? It's all very well to have these wonderful speakers who come on and teach us so much. But it's nice for people to know who we are so that they can really listen to us and say So that's what I'd like to do is kind of pepper these in. because there's always stuff happening in our lives. and hopefully maybe hopefully one day we'll get Erin to come on. And he can tell everybody about school and what he does. I would love to do that. So I think that is definitely somebody that I'd like to have on. We've got Nicole. I mean our fashionista. So it would be funny. All of them. I we have have them on. All right. Well, I think we're gonna go ahead and wrap it up. as always, good. And thank you for giving me the opportunity to share because obviously I am bubbling over and excited about leaving. I do. we will we will share this and then of course when I come back, we will share the trip and I will tell you all about it. but for now, please, please, please. I say it each week before we wrap up. like, follow us. subscribe, make sure that you're getting your episodes each week and comment, all of that helps. And share if you can some of the clips that we have on social media. Share on your social media so that others can get to hear about it. Because I think that there are so many people that when I tell them, they're like, my gosh, I didn't know you had a podcast. I'm like, yes, I have a podcast. So make sure that you do share on all your podcast platforms. You can find us on YouTube, Spotify, Apple Music. you name it. we are just so appreciative that you continue to tune in each week. And we will see you next time. Bye for now, everybody. Bye.