Latest / Voices for Voices® / Other People's Opinions Cost Me Years—Here's How I Stopped | Episode 501

Transcript

Other People's Opinions Cost Me Years—Here's How I Stopped | Episode 501 · Voices for Voices®

• 0:01
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Hi everyone, it's Justin here Voices for Voices.
• 0:05
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Thank you so much for joining us in this episode of the show.
• 0:09
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Whether you're watching, listening, here in the United States or abroad, thank you so much for making Voices for Voices, what it is.
• 0:19
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Um it's just uh incredible the following, the love and support that we get on a day-to-day basis from you, our listeners, our viewers.
• 0:33
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Uh, if you can help us out, follow us on social media, give us a big thumbs up, like, follow, subscribe, share, repost, and if you could reach out to 25 contacts in your phone and let them know about the Voices for Voices organization and the Voices for Voices TV show and podcast.
• 0:56
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: We are the hottest podcast and TV show on the planet.
• 1:01
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So if you could help us continue that uh activity, we'd greatly appreciate that.
• 1:11
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Thank you for joining us.
• 1:14
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So we're gonna talk a little bit about a little bit about ourselves.
• 1:20
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: There's a there's a song that is out where the the singer artist is talking about not minding talking about others, but it it would be nice if he would get to talk about himself sometimes.
• 1:55
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so that's one opinion.
• 1:59
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I I think probably partially that where do we how do we treat ourselves before we say we want to talk about ourselves, how do we treat ourselves on on a day-to-day basis?
• 2:23
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That I think is the key.
• 2:29
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: How do we think about our challenges, our successes?
• 2:40
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Because there's a fine line between being and and and thinking that we're the greatest things in sliced bread.
• 2:57
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's an analogy and or actually, or just giving ourselves I don't know, that proverbial pat on the back, or saying it's okay, it's okay where I'm at, it's okay what I'm doing.
• 3:35
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I'm doing the best that I can.
• 3:41
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: You know, whether it's in the professional realm or personal realm, you know, we we would probably call it gossip.
• 3:57
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: You know, talking about others, what others are doing, what others are wearing.
• 4:07
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And I think we think about that gossip, we might not say, oh, we're thinking about gossip.
• 4:17
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: We might not say that particular word.
• 4:23
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: But people watching talking about, oh, did you see what he was wearing?
• 4:30
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Did you see what he did?
• 4:32
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: What she did?
• 4:36
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Why would she wear those shoes?
• 4:39
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Why would he wear that shirt?
• 4:42
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Why would he wear that hat?
• 4:47
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Why would he pick that car?
• 4:51
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: You see what I'm getting at?
• 4:54
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's it's much easier to talk about and think about others and what we might think are their faults.
• 5:10
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Listen, we all have faults.
• 5:12
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: None of us are perfect.
• 5:19
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: None of us are perfect.
• 5:24
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So when we talk about others and uh oh, I'm not going to talk about this idea or that idea because that person did this or that.
• 5:39
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That's fine.
• 5:40
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: We have we have that option, we have that choice.
• 5:47
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: But I'm talking about right here, right now.
• 5:52
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: How do we how do we think about what we're doing?
• 5:59
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Are we happy with the work that we do?
• 6:08
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I am to some people they may say, oh no.
• 6:16
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That that couldn't be fun at all.
• 6:22
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Or, you know, these dumb videos, these stupid shows.
• 6:29
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Heard it.
• 6:32
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Heard it.
• 6:33
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I've heard that before.
• 6:37
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: But this stupid show is and has an incredible following, and that's thanks to you.
• 6:50
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: See, we don't do these shows for our uh just for our our health.
• 7:03
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Cause I know let me talk about the health part.
• 7:13
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: When we do shows, we do partially do them for our health.
• 7:24
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's a way of sharing, venting a video or a listening diary, we could call it, of our lives.
• 7:46
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: But in addition to that, we talk about helping one person.
• 7:57
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I already know I've helped one person, that we've helped one person, because I've helped myself by our TV show and podcast.
• 8:11
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And it's not to say, oh, I'm so good.
• 8:14
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's not that at all.
• 8:20
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's that again, we all have flaws, we all have things that yeah, that are flaws.
• 8:29
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I do too.
• 8:30
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I have a lot of them.
• 8:33
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Too many to count.
• 8:40
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: But what I try to do in those moments that I can like this is to just talk and just be real and you know, real talk, you know, real feelings, real thoughts.
• 9:01
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so we talk about how do we how do we treat ourselves after we do something that makes us feel good.
• 9:13
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: For me, that's helping people when I know that I'm helping someone, and then I know I'm at least helping myself by talking through issues, topics, experiences, events, life, feelings, emotions, all those, all those, I know that I'm helping myself.
• 9:54
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's not to be greedy, but just to be just to be transparent.
• 10:02
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's one of the things I learned about in therapy.
• 10:08
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: You know, we talk about journaling and how that's helpful, how we can take things outside of the brain from the brain and put it on paper, and if we're gonna hold on to it, we can.
• 10:22
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: If we want to not hold on to it, we we can do that too.
• 10:29
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: But just getting it out of our mind, out of our head is very helpful, and that's what I've been taught over these nine years where I'm continuing to learn how to live substance-free, which is predominantly alcohol free.
• 11:03
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so we're helping people, we're helping again.
• 11:09
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so, how does that make me feel?
• 11:10
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Makes me feel good, makes me feel like I've taken a little bit, a little bit off my shoulders, a little bit out of my mind, out of out of my head that I might carry around if I if I don't find a productive way of getting it out of my out of my mind, I guess we're gonna call it.
• 11:45
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So we already know we have flaws.
• 11:48
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so when we do and have moments, we can stop and go, okay.
• 12:04
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: This feels this feels good talking about this or sharing this, or whatever this is for you.
• 12:16
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: For me, a lot of it is to show it in a way chronicles my life through me and through our guests that we have.
• 12:37
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Some might not be comfortable doing that.
• 12:41
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That's okay.
• 12:45
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: What makes you feel good?
• 12:50
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: There's gotta be something.
• 12:52
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: There's gotta be something.
• 12:56
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: When you do it, it makes you feel good and go, Oh, I want to do that again.
• 13:04
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And for me, part of it is the Voices for Voices TV Sean Podcast.
• 13:16
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Incredibly helpful to me.
• 13:21
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Because as much as I try to journal, actually physically writing, I'm able to.
• 13:28
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I'm I'm thankful and grateful that I'm able to.
• 13:38
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I guess putting my life, experiences, everything, putting that together in a show format, in a podcast format.
• 13:57
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: This is basically my journal through the eyes and the lens of me and the guests that we have on our show.
• 14:16
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so that's why I'm so adamant about wanting to help people.
• 14:26
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Helping one person, or are you doing that?
• 14:30
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That's where that huge goal that we came up with where we want to reach and help at least three billion people over the course of my lifetime and beyond.
• 14:48
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That's billion with a B.
• 14:50
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That's three billion people.
• 14:53
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's a lot of people.
• 14:57
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: We can't do it alone, and we haven't been doing it alone.
• 15:06
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's because of you, other organizations saying, you know what, it this is this is pretty helpful, or it could be very helpful to some people in my network, some people in my phone, in my contacts, could be helpful.
• 15:36
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so I would say thinking about myself and those positive moments, like now.
• 15:48
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Okay, I'm nervous, but I over the the course of all our episodes.
• 16:01
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Well, there's there's some guests where I I get extra, extra stressed and nervous and anxious about uh but when I'm just talking, there's a there's a sense of peace and serenity because I know I'm taking ideas, events, experiences from my head, and I'm able to share.
• 16:31
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And then at the very least, I'm sharing them.
• 16:35
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So they're getting out of my head, and there just might be one person, one additional person that maybe or has gone through something says to themselves, you know what?
• 16:57
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I thought I was the only one.
• 17:00
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I thought it was just me.
• 17:05
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And here's this here's this dude on this show.
• 17:11
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: He's talking about these things, and I can relate to that.
• 17:21
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I forget what show I I was watching the other day.
• 17:27
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Oh, it was yeah, it was actually a trial in uh the counselor, therapist, however you want to refer, was going through these diagnoses that she was uncovering for for this patient.
• 18:07
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And there were a lot of things that I connected with and so the person that was getting these diagnoses through these assessment methods I was feeling, and this was like through the TV, I was like, oh wow, that's what these mean.
• 18:50
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That's what some additional areas of my diagnoses mean.
• 19:00
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And yes, that's me.
• 19:05
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: A lot of it was very I don't know, it yeah, just connected and I just started to think, wow, that's me.
• 19:24
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So that person who was being diagnosed with certain uh mental challenges we'll call it was not alone.
• 19:47
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so I even at age forty-four nine years removed from the old life.
• 20:01
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I'm still learning more about me from others from others, not mothers, others.
• 20:18
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so if I could talk to that individual, I I I would tell them and share that you're not the only one going through what you're going through.
• 20:33
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And there just might be someone watching and listening to Voices for Voices to our TV show and podcast that may say, ah, Justin, you're not alone.
• 21:06
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so we g we we should be able to treat ourselves with compassion, loving, uh kindness.
• 21:25
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Again, we're we're putting the flaws aside.
• 21:31
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: We're talking about how we're not alone in life.
• 21:41
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It may seem like we are.
• 21:48
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And with a lot of the work that I do, it seems like it's a lot.
• 21:54
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Like, I'm the only one going through this.
• 22:00
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so then I'll have my days of despair, I guess we call it.
• 22:09
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: But then I'll find strength from somewhere to continue.
• 22:22
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so I I don't I don't know where that strength comes from.
• 22:24
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I think it comes from God for me.
• 22:27
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I'm a believer, but you don't have to be to follow us, watch us, listen to us, buy our books, donate to our organization.
• 22:42
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's have to be a human being.
• 22:45
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That's it.
• 22:48
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: A human being that can say and think, wow, I am not alone.
• 23:03
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And you know what?
• 23:04
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: You're right.
• 23:05
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: You're not alone.
• 23:06
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I'm not alone.
• 23:09
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That individual that was being diagnosed that I mentioned, they're not alone.
• 23:27
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So a little more kindness, a little more grace, a little more patience with ourselves is going to go a long way.
• 23:40
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I'm not talking about just how others will then see us, perceive us, watch us, listen to us.
• 23:52
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I'm talking about how we see ourselves, hear ourselves.
• 24:03
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And I'll tell you this.
• 24:08
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Sometimes, for me, a lot of times, I get so down into the weeds.
• 24:15
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I'm like, are we making a difference?
• 24:18
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Are we doing this?
• 24:21
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That when I actually look up and I go, Oh my gosh, how did we get this far?
• 24:40
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: You know my answer is you, our viewers, our listeners, people commenting, people volunteering, people we meet all across the world.
• 25:03
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so we continue doing it because it makes me feel good that I can be and we can be a light to those who need it.
• 25:25
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I talk about this a lot.
• 25:27
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Somebody's thinking the life isn't cut out for them.
• 25:37
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: When we talk about helping one person, I'd say helping one person stay away from that ledge, seek counseling, and on this counseling, therapy, whatever we want to call it.
• 26:03
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: There's a lot of people out there, a lot of counselors, a lot of therapists.
• 26:09
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Number one, in my opinion, and with my experience of therapy, consistently, often they let me talk, they let me share.
• 26:36
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Kinda like this.
• 26:39
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Kinda like our voices for voices, TV show and podcast.
• 26:46
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: They let me talk, they listen, they jump in when they need to.
• 27:01
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And so for me, that's the type of therapist I need is one that will listen to me, that won't bombard me with a lot of things.
• 27:18
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Because part of me, when that happens, if I get bombarded, I get really stressed, I get burnt out, and then I just shut down.
• 27:33
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I'm like, there's just so much here.
• 27:38
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I I don't know.
• 27:43
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I'm just gonna move on to the next thing.
• 27:52
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So you gotta find your style.
• 27:56
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: You gotta find that ahead of time.
• 27:58
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Because when when you're when you're sitting, either in person, standing in person, virtually, however, you have to you have to know what what you want to get out of that therapy, counseling, relationship.
• 28:32
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I don't know that you know we can be really fixed.
• 28:37
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: We can be given ideas and thoughts and coping mechanisms and that.
• 28:44
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: But at the end of the day, it comes down to us.
• 28:53
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So think about what kind of person, what kind of attributes you would want them to have.
• 29:05
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So that when you're actually meeting with them, you can think to yourself, okay, this jives with what I what I need, or maybe not.
• 29:24
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And I mentioned there's a lot of therapists, a lot of the counselors out there.
• 29:30
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: You may have to go through two, three, or four or so counselors or therapists until you have that, you know, that match where it's like, all right, they get me.
• 29:45
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: They let they let me talk.
• 29:49
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: They listen, they give feedback.
• 29:57
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That's how I that's how I know, or have a good idea that I'm be sticking with psychiatrist or therapist, counselor.
• 30:16
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So you gotta know that ahead of time.
• 30:21
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Because you're getting billed, your insurance is getting billed, and you're having to copay, maybe.
• 30:28
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Um, and so the more you can have an idea in your mind, the better off you're gonna be, and the less time you're gonna spend going, okay, I've had seven visits, but I I don't know if we really connect that this is what I need.
• 30:59
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That's seven co-pays, that's seven, what insurance isn't gonna pay.
• 31:10
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And if you don't have insurance, there's been times I haven't had insurance.
• 31:16
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's gotta find a way.
• 31:21
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And when you have a counselor, therapist, psychiatrist that are that's gonna work with you, that shows you compassion, kindness, that's when you know that you found the right, the right person for this.
• 31:46
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So you gotta find out what you're you're seeking, what you're looking for, what your end game is.
• 31:54
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: You know, people ask me, Justin, how long are you gonna go to therapy and and all that and and and the things?
• 32:04
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I say, I don't know, I'm probably gonna go the rest of my life.
• 32:11
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Because I know what the other side looks like for me, and it's not healthy, or it's less healthy ever we want to put terms on these words, these definitions.
• 32:34
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So that's the huge thing, and there's people out there that really care.
• 32:50
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: You might think, well, they let they just let me talk.
• 32:54
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: They didn't they just listen.
• 33:01
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Maybe that works for you, maybe it doesn't.
• 33:04
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: If you're thinking, I thought they would say something, I thought they would say more.
• 33:10
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: These people, this is their career, their job, their profession.
• 33:15
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So they're listening to you.
• 33:17
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Chances are, with their training and background and experience, listening to you, they may have thought about and said that that's what this that's what this patient needs.
• 33:34
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: This is what this person needs.
• 33:37
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: They don't need me interrupting all the time.
• 33:48
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And then secondly and lastly, it is always hard at the beginning.
• 34:06
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Right, when you're trying something new.
• 34:20
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: The more we do it, the more we go.
• 34:25
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: The more we the more we believe in ourselves.
• 34:36
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Then that's gonna go over into our our therapy counseling sessions and then we're gonna be more confident.
• 34:54
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: There's gonna be a little bit less stress.
• 34:59
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Again, it doesn't solve everything.
• 35:01
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Doesn't solve everything at all.
• 35:09
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: But just a little bit of less stress can mean the world.
• 35:19
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Especially if you or I are on the brink of burn burnout and going, oh my gosh, how am I gonna get through this?
• 35:41
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So build your team like a coach builds their team.
• 36:07
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's just, you know, build your team.
• 36:12
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: The people that professionally it's their job to help you and I.
• 36:25
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And look, we gotta get over ourselves in what other people think.
• 36:36
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: That that's I said lastly before the other point.
• 36:40
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: But this is lastly, we gotta get over ourselves, we have to get over.
• 36:45
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Well, this person said this about me, or I wonder what they're thinking.
• 36:49
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I've been there.
• 36:50
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: How do I look?
• 36:52
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: How do I sound?
• 36:54
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: How am I driving?
• 36:55
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: How am I?
• 37:01
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And I had to get over that didn't mean that any of those are perfect.
• 37:08
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Absolutely not.
• 37:10
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: We all have flaws, I have flaws, but we just don't let that gossip I talked about at the beginning of the show.
• 37:26
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: We don't let it work bother us as much.
• 37:30
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's about how we can say, get by in this life, and not be so concerned what others think.
• 37:49
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Cause it doesn't matter.
• 37:51
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: No matter how popular somebody may seem, how much money, cars, uh, mansions, yachts, airplanes, helicopters, however, you want to measure that, we could have all those things and still be empty inside.
• 38:18
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And just because somebody has those things doesn't mean that they're always the nicest person to others, they may flaunt those types of things, yeah.
• 38:40
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And you might think, oh, well, so and so is talking about me, or I wonder what they think, or I'm never gonna attain this goal, or we gotta get started, we gotta get past that.
• 38:54
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's hard, it's not easy, it's hard.
• 38:58
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: But let me tell you, once you get moving, then you're gonna be like me, and nine years later, go, wow, spend nine years or longer, like my friend Don Mattis Jr., forty years sober.
• 39:29
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: He said he looked back and he's like, oh my gosh, forty years.
• 39:37
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So everybody has a thing, and I'm not talking that you have to go sober.
• 39:47
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: I'm not talking.
• 39:48
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Find your thing, find your things that you like to do to make you feel good, to make you feel like you know what, I don't care what others think.
• 40:04
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Again, we're talking about healthy things, not illegal things.
• 40:10
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So I have to put that disclaimer in there.
• 40:20
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So thank you for joining us on this episode of The Voices for Voices TV show and podcast.
• 40:27
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Give us those big thumbs up, like, follow, subscribe, share, repost, follow us on social media, reach out to 25, 50, 100 of your contacts and your phone, let them know about the show.
• 40:42
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: And we are grateful and thankful for you joining us, and we look forward to the next show coming to you, and uh just uh so grateful to have the demand of our shows be what it is for us to continue doing what we're doing.
• 41:14
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: It's very, very, very humbling.
• 41:18
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So thank you for that.
• 41:21
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: So until next time, let's celebrate the voices of the world and let's be a voice for ourselves and maybe somebody else in need that's not able to do so.
• 41:38
  Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: Take care, bye bye for now.