Latest / Reclaiming Consciousness / Let's Raise the Standards in the Coaching Industry
Transcript
- 0:00SPEAKER_00: Anytime that you are in a relationship with somebody where you are close to them, your personal relational stuff will surface unless you have dealt with it or you know it enough to know when it's surfacing.
- 0:18SPEAKER_00: Welcome to Reclaiming Consciousness.
- 0:20SPEAKER_00: My name is Elise Bassine, spiritual mentor, breathwork practitioner, and owner and CEO of Elise Breeds.
- 0:27SPEAKER_00: For many years, our consciousness has been hijacked by societal and cultural programming, religion, the media, and familial and ancestral trauma.
- 0:36SPEAKER_00: Right now, during this epic time in history, people are waking up, realizing who they really are, and reclaiming the pieces of their consciousness that they unknowingly gave away.
- 0:48SPEAKER_00: This podcast is an exploration of how so many spectacular humans are leading the way in exiting the matrix and reclaiming who they really are and what they're capable of.
- 0:59SPEAKER_00: In this show, you'll meet exceptional people who are paving the way in raising consciousness and creating a new way of living on this earth.
- 1:07SPEAKER_00: Get ready to go deep.
- 1:08SPEAKER_00: Now let's dive in.
- 1:16SPEAKER_00: Hi everyone, welcome back to the show.
- 1:19SPEAKER_00: So this week I am talking about something that has been on my heart and on my mind for a long time, especially as somebody who feels very, very passionately about trauma and being trauma-informed and also being in integrity as a practitioner and someone that really values spiritual and emotional intelligence.
- 1:47SPEAKER_00: I wanted to speak to this topic of the coaching industry and just kind of my assessment of what I see happening.
- 1:57SPEAKER_00: And it's like in no way to make anybody wrong or to be negative in any way.
- 2:04SPEAKER_00: I just feel like there's some things that have to be said and just some things that I've observed that I think are an invitation for evolution in this space.
- 2:16SPEAKER_00: And it's just something that I feel so strongly about that I needed to bring it to the forefront of my conversations that I'm having.
- 2:27SPEAKER_00: And it's something that as I've been teaching my certification program this time around and going really deep into what it means to show up in integrity as a practitioner and how to hold space for people, and especially how to understand when you are being triggered by somebody or when you are projecting on somebody, or just what your stuff is so that you don't bring it into the client relationship.
- 3:03SPEAKER_00: And this is a place that I see is in order to be able to do this, you A, have to have training in it, and B, you have to have done enough personal growth work to be aware of what your stuff is so that you don't bring it into your relationship with clients and then also know how to deal with it if and when it does come up in your relationship with clients.
- 3:29SPEAKER_00: The reason why I feel so strongly about it is because if that doesn't happen, then people can get hurt and also people may not get the best results that they could have from the relationship.
- 3:43SPEAKER_00: So that's why I wanted to go into this today, because it's just something that I feel so strongly about.
- 3:50SPEAKER_00: So before I dive in headfirst here, I just want to make a couple quick announcements about some things that are happening over here.
- 3:59SPEAKER_00: So something really fun that I have going on is I'm going to be offering the Sacred Money Mind again in the next couple of weeks.
- 4:08SPEAKER_00: It's going to start again in May.
- 4:11SPEAKER_00: And it was so much fun before you guys.
- 4:14SPEAKER_00: And I know a lot of people were in it.
- 4:16SPEAKER_00: We had such a great turnout and it was so much fun.
- 4:19SPEAKER_00: And what the Sacred Money Mind is, is it's a 21-day Voxer broadcast where I come in Voxer four days a week for 21 days, and I give you channeled transmissions on wealth consciousness and how to raise your consciousness around wealth.
- 4:39SPEAKER_00: Because this is something that I have found to be so incredibly important as we evolve as humans, but also as we're wanting to make more money, we also want to be able to access higher states of consciousness around wealth and money so that we can move in our money journey in a way that is going to A, give us the most momentum and move the fastest, and also B, be able to look at money and wealth differently beyond the programming that we've had and beyond what the quote unquote like normal way of looking at it is, so that you can evolve your relationship with it.
- 5:23SPEAKER_00: So I pop in every single day for 21 days and give you a channel transmission around how to raise your wealth consciousness.
- 5:32SPEAKER_00: And then also the different teachings that I have around how to work with your own mind in order to magnetize money more quickly.
- 5:40SPEAKER_00: Because if you can master working with your mind, you will be able to magnetize money a lot more quickly.
- 5:48SPEAKER_00: So that is the main things that you will be getting in that container.
- 5:54SPEAKER_00: And I also will be sending you breath work sessions that I've created and meditations around these topics specifically that will take you beyond just the intellect so that you can integrate the teachings on a deeper level and also release any old programming that you have around money that you might not even be aware of, you know, because I feel like money is one of those topics where we might think that we are evolving or looking at it differently, but there can be some really sticky programs and limiting beliefs and also ancestral trauma around money and wealth.
- 6:35SPEAKER_00: And in order to really get to the place that you want to be when it comes to money, those things have to be addressed and shifted.
- 6:43SPEAKER_00: So that will be part of the program as well.
- 6:46SPEAKER_00: So right now it's only 111.
- 6:49SPEAKER_00: I haven't even announced it anywhere else yet.
- 6:51SPEAKER_00: So I'm gonna put the link here and it's not gonna be 111 for that long, probably just a week.
- 6:57SPEAKER_00: But like I said, I'm just announcing it now, but I wanted to announce it to you guys first.
- 7:02SPEAKER_00: And if you already did the first round, then you can come into this round for only$55.
- 7:09SPEAKER_00: So if you did the last round and you want to do the next one, and the next one is completely new information because it's all gonna be channeled in each day.
- 7:18SPEAKER_00: So it's gonna be completely new and it's gonna be updated, evolved, new information, new teaching.
- 7:25SPEAKER_00: So if you did the last round, it doesn't mean that you shouldn't do the next round because it's just gonna build on that and you're just gonna learn more and more and evolve more and more.
- 7:34SPEAKER_00: It's kind of a no-brainer if you did the first round to come into the second, it's only$55.
- 7:39SPEAKER_00: Just reach out to me and I will send you the link for the people who have already done the first round.
- 7:45SPEAKER_00: That sacred money mind, everybody should join because it's so much fun.
- 7:50SPEAKER_00: And then we do a QA at the end.
- 7:52SPEAKER_00: So you can submit questions at the end, and then we get on a Zoom call and I answer everybody's questions.
- 7:58SPEAKER_00: And it's just really fun.
- 8:00SPEAKER_00: And it's just a great way to learn information too, because you can pop into the Voxer at any time, listen to it like a podcast.
- 8:08SPEAKER_00: A lot of the transmissions are longer, so you can really dive deep.
- 8:13SPEAKER_00: And I love to listen to information on audio.
- 8:16SPEAKER_00: I absorb it better because I like to either listen to it while I'm walking or doing something else.
- 8:22SPEAKER_00: And I really integrate information like that.
- 8:25SPEAKER_00: So join me in the sacred money mine.
- 8:27SPEAKER_00: We're gonna be starting in May.
- 8:28SPEAKER_00: I don't know the exact date, but we'll keep you posted and you'll be getting all that information after you sign up.
- 8:35SPEAKER_00: And then also I have the high frequency channel Mastermind happening right now that's also starting in May.
- 8:42SPEAKER_00: And that's where I teach you how to use breathwork to channel innovative ideas and strategies for your business.
- 8:49SPEAKER_00: The mastermind right now is still in pre-sale pricing.
- 8:54SPEAKER_00: So it's only$5,000 and you can do an extended payment plan as well.
- 9:00SPEAKER_00: It's pretty easy of an investment, especially because you're getting two private calls with me as well.
- 9:06SPEAKER_00: It's a three-month program.
- 9:08SPEAKER_00: So, in addition to the two group calls a month, where I'm gonna be doing group coaching and really guiding you through step by step how to access your channel and how to receive more and more specific and detailed information.
- 9:24SPEAKER_00: You're also gonna get one-on-ones with me where I'm gonna go really deep into helping you in the specific way that you channel because everyone does it differently.
- 9:34SPEAKER_00: And it's so important to understand how you specifically do it.
- 9:39SPEAKER_00: And I see so many people who just think that they can't do it or they think that they're not doing it right, but really they just don't understand what their specific way of doing it is.
- 9:51SPEAKER_00: And once you start to understand that and then develop your relationship with it, it just skyrockets.
- 9:58SPEAKER_00: And I literally channel everything for my business.
- 10:02SPEAKER_00: All of my offerings and my content and just the way that I talk about things, everything comes through my channel.
- 10:10SPEAKER_00: And I kind of reverse-engineered my process so that I can teach it to you because this is something I've been doing for a really long time.
- 10:17SPEAKER_00: And it's kind of like how I've evolved my relationship with breath work too.
- 10:23SPEAKER_00: Because after teaching and sharing breath work for so many years, I have really begun to see what is actually available beyond just the trauma healing or beyond just, you know, having a healing experience or having a peak experience during a breath work session.
- 10:42SPEAKER_00: We can really take it beyond that to being able to develop a very clear and specific relationship with higher states of consciousness, with your higher self, with the aspects of you that exist in the higher realms that are what I call all-knowing.
- 11:01SPEAKER_00: And that's where you can tap in and access the information that is specific to you that will create the success that you desire in your business because it's all there.
- 11:12SPEAKER_00: It's just about tapping into it.
- 11:14SPEAKER_00: And the breath work is such a fast pathway to get there because not only do you tap into your channel immediately, but you also quickly clear away any of the doubt, the blocks, the interference, the ancestral programming, the old stories, any family programming, past life programming.
- 11:35SPEAKER_00: It all clears away through the breath so that you can access your channel much more quickly and clearly.
- 11:42SPEAKER_00: And this is what I'm gonna be teaching in the mastermind.
- 11:45SPEAKER_00: Plus, we're gonna be doing a breathwork experience there where I'm gonna walk you through it and I'm gonna share my very specific process that's really tangible that you can begin to implement on your own so that you can really get some amazing results with this quickly.
- 12:03SPEAKER_00: That is the mastermind.
- 12:05SPEAKER_00: Reach out to me if you like to chat about if this is a fit for you or if you'd like more information.
- 12:11SPEAKER_00: And we're gonna be moving from pre-sale pricing after the 19th.
- 12:15SPEAKER_00: So you have, you know, just about a week to sign up at this price, which is pretty much a no-brainer considering what you get, the two private calls plus all the group calls.
- 12:27SPEAKER_00: Oh, and we have a telegram chat that I'm gonna be coaching in.
- 12:31SPEAKER_00: So you're getting support from me four days a week, and then the calls and then your privates.
- 12:36SPEAKER_00: So this is like a very immersive experience where you're going to be deeply supported in channeling and really opening up to these new levels of being able to receive information from your higher self, your guides, the aspects of you that exist at higher states of consciousness.
- 12:56SPEAKER_00: Because this is available to you and it's such a powerful tool for your business because then you're not using someone else's template, you're not using someone else's formula, you're doing what is going to work for you.
- 13:09SPEAKER_00: And the thing is, what I've seen so much just, you know, in the coaching industry, which is what I'm gonna be talking about today, is you know, a lot of times people teach you and they teach their clients what has worked for them.
- 13:22SPEAKER_00: And that's great, but not what worked for them is not always gonna work for you.
- 13:28SPEAKER_00: That's why learning from other people is amazing and taking and integrating that information is important, but ultimately you want to be able to tap into what is going to work for you and be able to use that as your first point of reference so that you can grow your business in a way that is going to work for you because there's a million ways to make a million dollars.
- 13:55SPEAKER_00: And what worked for somebody is most likely the thing that worked for them, but it's probably not the thing that's gonna work for you.
- 14:01SPEAKER_00: So being able to tap into what does work for you is a game changer.
- 14:06SPEAKER_00: That's that.
- 14:07SPEAKER_00: Reach out to me if you want to chat more about that.
- 14:09SPEAKER_00: So now I'm gonna go into the topic that I wanted to share about today.
- 14:16SPEAKER_00: You know, again, this is totally not to talk negatively about anybody or the coaching industry in general, because I think that it's amazing and I'm so grateful for my business and for what I've created and for the coaches I've worked with and for the people I've met, my friends and colleagues, and there's so many people doing such amazing work in the world right now.
- 14:39SPEAKER_00: And I really do honor that and I really do hold that in a high regard.
- 14:45SPEAKER_00: And I do think that because the coaching industry has grown so fast, I think there's been some things that have been skipped over that I think are incredibly important that I want to highlight today in this episode.
- 15:01SPEAKER_00: The biggest thing for me is the client practitioner relationship and the integrity within the client practitioner relationship.
- 15:11SPEAKER_00: What can happen?
- 15:12SPEAKER_00: And this, you know, if you have training as a therapist or a counselor or in the mental health field, you know this.
- 15:20SPEAKER_00: There is something that's called transference.
- 15:24SPEAKER_00: And this is like a counseling term.
- 15:25SPEAKER_00: This is not even something that I really use because I think it goes way beyond this, but I'm just kind of sharing this as a point of reference for anybody who has trained as a clinician in the mental health field or a psychologist or anything like that.
- 15:40SPEAKER_00: And this is a concept of the practitioner ending up either like taking on what their client is experiencing or projecting onto their client something that they're experiencing, but that's not necessarily what the client is experiencing.
- 15:56SPEAKER_00: And it takes a very high level of skillfulness to be able to determine the difference between you and your client and your stuff, your opinions, your biases, your beliefs, your trauma, your stories, and the way that you perceive the world, being able to separate all of that from the experience that you have with your client and not projecting that onto them.
- 16:25SPEAKER_00: And the other piece of this is that when a client brings something to you, being able to separate your personal feelings, your opinions, and your trauma from what they're experiencing.
- 16:44SPEAKER_00: This requires a level of skill.
- 16:46SPEAKER_00: And if people don't have that skill, then what can happen is they can project things onto their clients, they can tell their client that they think something is happening that might not actually be happening, or they can give them some kind of advice or tell them to do something that's not actually a contribution to the client or in their highest good.
- 17:09SPEAKER_00: So one of the ways that we really can prevent this from happening is first and foremost, knowing what your own stuff is.
- 17:20SPEAKER_00: And I think that one of the things that I see in the coaching industry that really is something that I think needs to evolve is people really doing deeper inner work so that they can separate their stuff from their client's stuff.
- 17:38SPEAKER_00: And when they're in a situation, if their personal stuff gets triggered by the client, having the emotional and spiritual intelligence to A, notice that that's happening and then B, be able to put that aside so that they can show up in presence, clarity, and neutrality for their client.
- 18:00SPEAKER_00: And then after that is done, then dealing with what came up for them.
- 18:06SPEAKER_00: And this requires a high level of skill.
- 18:09SPEAKER_00: Because if you're not aware of what your stuff is, you will just experience your stuff as how you're feeling about what the client is telling you.
- 18:18SPEAKER_00: So, for example, if a client is telling you something and all of a sudden you have a really strong reaction and you're like, oh my gosh, this is wrong.
- 18:26SPEAKER_00: You need to do this, you need to do that.
- 18:28SPEAKER_00: Most likely that's your stuff coming up because we want to be able to hold a level of neutrality with our clients so that we're present with them, we're holding space for them, we're listening to them, and we're not making them feel bad or making them feel like you are shocked or have a strong reaction to anything that they're going through.
- 18:48SPEAKER_00: You know, one of the things that um my clients will always say to me, and even when I was a school counselor too, is I love talking to you because I feel like I could bring anything to you and you're not going to be shocked.
- 19:04SPEAKER_00: It's not gonna faze you.
- 19:06SPEAKER_00: You're not gonna be upset by it.
- 19:08SPEAKER_00: You're just going to listen and be neutral.
- 19:11SPEAKER_00: And that's really what we want to be doing as practitioners.
- 19:14SPEAKER_00: And, you know, I know there's a difference between someone who's quote unquote just a coach and somebody who is a healer.
- 19:21SPEAKER_00: And I do think that as healers, we have an even more greater responsibility to be in a level of integrity with knowing our own stuff so that we can put it to the side when we're helping other people.
- 19:36SPEAKER_00: However, the same thing can happen with a coach, right?
- 19:40SPEAKER_00: Especially if you're working with somebody who is like a closer proximity client, like a private client, that type of thing.
- 19:48SPEAKER_00: It can also happen with a coach because anytime you are in a relationship with someone, this is very important.
- 19:55SPEAKER_00: If you are doing something else in multitasking, stop what you're doing and just listen to this very thing.
- 20:00SPEAKER_00: If you don't listen to anything else on this episode, anytime that you are in a relationship with somebody where you are close to them, your personal relational stuff will surface unless you have dealt with it or you know it enough to know when it's surfacing, right?
- 20:19SPEAKER_00: So this has happened to me as a client and also as a practitioner, where when something happens, I'm acutely aware, like, oh, my mom stuff is coming up, or the reason why I'm triggered about this right now is because this is my pattern with my mom.
- 20:36SPEAKER_00: I'm either feeling overly responsible or I'm feeling like I'm in trouble or I did something wrong.
- 20:42SPEAKER_00: You know, this I'm just giving you examples of my own stuff.
- 20:45SPEAKER_00: And I'm sure many of you can relate.
- 20:48SPEAKER_00: But in order to be at the highest level of integrity when we serve our clients and for them to get the best results, we need to be able to recognize that that is happening and put it to the side when we are having conversation, when we are giving them advice, quote unquote, or telling them what our feedback is.
- 21:12SPEAKER_00: We have to be able to separate that.
- 21:14SPEAKER_00: And as I've been going along now in my business, there's been so many times where I have spoken to clients who have told me stories about working with coaches where, you know, they told them to do things or they gave them advice or they said things to them that were completely not in the highest good of the client.
- 21:36SPEAKER_00: And it was clearly a projection of the coach.
- 21:39SPEAKER_00: And that is precisely why I am doing this episode, because I just deeply feel that this needs to be talked about and this needs to be brought to light, especially because, you know, as a practitioner myself and as somebody who teaches and certifies other people to be trauma informed and work with trauma.
- 22:00SPEAKER_00: There is nothing else that is as important as this.
- 22:06SPEAKER_00: Because if this thing is not addressed, if you are not able to have the skillfulness to put your stuff aside, then A, people can get hurt.
- 22:17SPEAKER_00: And B, people are not going to receive the results or move in the way that they would really desire to inside the coaching container.
- 22:28SPEAKER_00: So knowing what your stuff is, meaning like your stories, your trauma, your beliefs, knowing what that is and what it feels like in your body and in your energy field, is crucial to being a good practitioner and being somebody that is able to remain neutral even when something is in front of you that is potentially triggering to you, or is potentially something that is similar to a trauma that you went through as a child, or something that is similar to a relationship that you had, not bringing your emotional response to that into the relationship.
- 23:10SPEAKER_00: So not only being aware of your own trauma is super important, right?
- 23:15SPEAKER_00: And I could talk about that one all day.
- 23:17SPEAKER_00: I can't stress that enough of just being aware of your stuff.
- 23:22SPEAKER_00: But the other thing that's really important that I think a lot of people aren't aware of or don't know about is being aware of the way trauma presents in other people and being sensitive to that.
- 23:35SPEAKER_00: And I think a lot of what can happen and what has happened with certain coaching relationships is that because people might not be trauma informed or understand how trauma can show up or how it can present itself, they can end up re-traumatizing their clients because they're not aware that there is trauma that's coming up.
- 23:59SPEAKER_00: So, meaning they could develop a relationship where they are telling their client to do something, but because of the client's trauma, they're not able to do it.
- 24:10SPEAKER_00: And then the client ends up feeling like they're not good enough or they're not getting the result, or the coach may continue to push them to do something that's actually re-traumatizing them.
- 24:24SPEAKER_00: So this is another thing that's really important.
- 24:26SPEAKER_00: And another reason why I feel so strongly about being trauma informed in this industry is because if we're not, then we can unknowingly re-traumatize people.
- 24:36SPEAKER_00: And that has the opposite effect of the results that people are wanting when they start working with somebody.
- 24:44SPEAKER_00: So that's another thing that's super important is being able to see and notice and have the awareness when somebody's trauma is coming up, or just noticing the signs of when people have experienced trauma so that you don't overlook it and continue to push them to do something or push a certain narrative, or, you know, kind of be like, well, why can't you do this or why aren't you doing this?
- 25:11SPEAKER_00: Because sometimes because of people's trauma or things that they've gone through, um, doing certain things can feel a lot more difficult than it would be for somebody who doesn't have trauma.
- 25:23SPEAKER_00: And I just want to state before I move on that this is not to say if you have trauma, you're a victim and you can't do stuff.
- 25:30SPEAKER_00: You know, that is not the way that I look at things and that is not what I believe.
- 25:34SPEAKER_00: But if we aren't aware of this stuff, then we can unknowingly recreate it and unknowingly push somebody up against something that they don't know how to move through because their trauma is coming up, and then the person supporting them doesn't know how to support them through that or isn't aware of what's happening.
- 25:53SPEAKER_00: That's all I'm saying.
- 25:54SPEAKER_00: So another thing that I think is really important just around the awareness and emotional intelligence within the client relationship is around this idea of being aware of how you are interacting with your clients and if you are having some kind of need from them.
- 26:18SPEAKER_00: And that is a really important like nuance to relationship dynamics that a lot of people aren't aware of.
- 26:26SPEAKER_00: But if we have wounding around, you know, seeking external validation or having some sort of emotional wound or emotional void from childhood that we're not aware of, then the coach or the practitioner can unknowingly seek for this need to be met through their clients.
- 26:45SPEAKER_00: And this is something that I actually see a lot of in the coaching industry, sadly.
- 26:50SPEAKER_00: And it is really out of integrity and it needs to be addressed because, like I said, the relationship between the client and the practitioner is meant to be one for growth, where the practitioner holds a space of neutrality and possibility versus the coach needing anything from the client.
- 27:11SPEAKER_00: And this can create a number of unhealthy dynamics if it goes on with people not being aware of it.
- 27:20SPEAKER_00: So, for example, if the coach is somebody who is seeking external validation to, you know, maybe they have an idea that the way that they feel purposeful or the way that they feel good enough is by other people needing them, right?
- 27:36SPEAKER_00: So then they'll create situations with clients where the client is always needing them and can't move forward without their advice or doing what they say or asking their opinion about every little thing, where it creates this dynamic of the client needing them to like live their life because the coach feels like they are seeking validation from being needed.
- 27:59SPEAKER_00: And then they'll create that dynamic in the relationship.
- 28:02SPEAKER_00: And then it creates a codependent dynamic.
- 28:05SPEAKER_00: So anytime where we have unhealed emotional wounds or traumas from childhood, and then we get into a relationship, we will recreate them, not because we want to, but that's just how it works, because they are desiring to be reconciled.
- 28:21SPEAKER_00: So they'll show up as a mirror in the people that we get close with.
- 28:24SPEAKER_00: And this is how we can end up creating dynamics of codependency in our relationships because we are seeking for that person to meet the unmet need that we have.
- 28:35SPEAKER_00: And then anytime that you think that you need something from someone else in order to be okay, that's codependency.
- 28:43SPEAKER_00: So this is something that everyone in the coaching industry needs to be checking themselves for.
- 28:48SPEAKER_00: And it's something that, you know, it's not to say like if it happens, it's okay.
- 28:54SPEAKER_00: It's just a matter of being aware of it and then doing better next time, you know, it's not to like shame or make anyone wrong at all.
- 29:02SPEAKER_00: I just want to bring awareness to this so that people understand how these things work so we can continue to evolve this space to raise the standard for how we relate and our consciousness around relating.
- 29:16SPEAKER_00: The next thing is what I've noticed around kind of these like power dynamics that can happen in coaching spaces where the coach has obviously some unmet need around, you know, needing not only external validation, but also just people to kind of be their fans or be in love with them.
- 29:38SPEAKER_00: And then they create a situation where it's like they're the celebrity and everyone else is their fan.
- 29:43SPEAKER_00: And I don't think that most people knowingly or consciously create this.
- 29:48SPEAKER_00: In fact, I really don't think anybody knowingly or consciously creates this.
- 29:53SPEAKER_00: I think that because they have an unmet need or an unhealed wound or a place where they are just not conscious or aware about something in their own psyche, they create an energetic dynamic in a coaching container where they are seeking validation through people fangirling them.
- 30:11SPEAKER_00: And then they just continue to recreate these same situations where they're pulling people in through this like fangirl way, instead of it just being about the information that they're providing or the coaching they're providing or the support they're providing.
- 30:26SPEAKER_00: Because whatever you're teaching, whatever you're sharing, whatever way you're supporting, your job as a coach or a practitioner is to remain neutral.
- 30:35SPEAKER_00: And obviously there's uh variations to this, right?
- 30:38SPEAKER_00: Like I've had clients where I've had to tell them hard truths and you know, I had to be firm with them and get a little bit big in my tone, but it's also because they're paying me to tell them the truth.
- 30:52SPEAKER_00: And if I've witnessed them do the same, repeat the same unhealthy relationship pattern over and over and over again, and they haven't listened to me the first 10 times, on the 11th time, I'm gonna be like, yo, this is a problem.
- 31:07SPEAKER_00: And if you want to grow, it needs to change, right?
- 31:11SPEAKER_00: But it that's coming from a place of me just telling them the honest truth from like a clear place about what needs to happen so they can get the result they want to get.
- 31:22SPEAKER_00: It's not about my opinion, it's not about me being triggered, it's just about me telling them the truth of what is going to get them to where they want to go.
- 31:31SPEAKER_00: And that ultimately should be the only objective of a coach or practitioner is to give you the information, support, and tools that you need in order to get where you desire to go and having that be clear in the relationship.
- 31:47SPEAKER_00: Anything else beyond that to me is not healthy or necessary and is going to involve some kind of unconscious dynamic.
- 31:56SPEAKER_00: And then the last thing is these power dynamics, if they go unchecked for a long period of time, can end up or culminate into, you know, kind of more of this like cult vibe where everyone is kind of following everything that the coach says without really questioning it or like doing things that might otherwise go against their better judgment or their own values or morality or what feels good to them just because that person says it.
- 32:27SPEAKER_00: So it's actually like a dynamic that's set up where people end up giving their power away.
- 32:32SPEAKER_00: And this, again, is always an unconscious dynamic.
- 32:35SPEAKER_00: I really don't think that anyone is setting out saying, I want to have power over people.
- 32:40SPEAKER_00: But if they have an unhealed wound around their own power or around feeling powerless, or around just whatever it is that happened in their life that they haven't dealt with that made them feel unsafe, or maybe where people had power over them, then in order to reconcile it, they could recreate a situation like this, especially, you know, a coach who ends up having a big following and whatever it is, right?
- 33:08SPEAKER_00: And I think we're seeing this more and more, even with all of these documentaries that are coming out around cults.
- 33:14SPEAKER_00: This is definitely something that we see in the coaching industry.
- 33:18SPEAKER_00: And I think that again, it's not conscious.
- 33:21SPEAKER_00: I don't think that people are trying to create this dynamic, but I think when there are things that are unhealed in the subconscious, whether it's even ancestral stuff or past life stuff, these types of dynamics can occur.
- 33:37SPEAKER_00: And I want to bring this to light because this is again, not to make anybody wrong.
- 33:41SPEAKER_00: I do think that most people start out with the purest intentions.
- 33:46SPEAKER_00: It's just that if there are unconscious wounds in the psyche, they will come to light through these types of relationships.
- 33:54SPEAKER_00: That's just the nature of the human experience.
- 33:57SPEAKER_00: So we just want to be aware of these types of things and always in every relationship, bring yourself back to yourself and your own power and what feels right for you.
- 34:09SPEAKER_00: And then also as a practitioner, always just reflecting on, especially if there's like a dynamic or a situation that feels sticky for you, really leaning into like, okay, what is happening for me here?
- 34:23SPEAKER_00: Why is this particular situation with my client feeling this way to me?
- 34:28SPEAKER_00: And like, what is it bringing up for me?
- 34:30SPEAKER_00: And then getting support with it.
- 34:32SPEAKER_00: And especially with certain things, if you are a healer or working with anyone in that capacity as a practitioner, then really being aware of that.
- 34:42SPEAKER_00: This is what I'm gonna share with you guys what I told the ladies in the certification.
- 34:47SPEAKER_00: Just a little snippet.
- 34:49SPEAKER_00: Obviously, you're not getting all of it.
- 34:50SPEAKER_00: But what I said was when you're working with someone and they have something come up for them and you feel triggered, your job as a practitioner is to be able to take that feeling, notice it, be aware of it, and take it and put it in a little box to the side, stay present and remain neutral and do your best with your client to hold space and be supportive and share with them what they need and give them the tools, reflect things back to them.
- 35:20SPEAKER_00: And then when that situation is over, you take that stuff that you put in the box and you bring it back to yourself and you say, okay, what happened for me here?
- 35:30SPEAKER_00: What do I need to unpack?
- 35:32SPEAKER_00: And what support do I need so that I can move through this?
- 35:36SPEAKER_00: And that is the most integrous way to handle when you get triggered by a client.
- 35:42SPEAKER_00: But the biggest thing is just having awareness because if the practitioner or the coach doesn't have awareness, then they will react or project in a way that is not of highest service to their client and can muddy up the waters and be confusing to the client and for the relationship in general.
- 36:03SPEAKER_00: So I think my biggest thing, and and I just feel this way so strongly when as I work with clients, I am always striving to be in the most clear and most integrity.
- 36:16SPEAKER_00: And again, like I'm not perfect.
- 36:18SPEAKER_00: Like I've made mistakes, I've created dynamics that I didn't want to create or felt certain ways that I had to clear.
- 36:25SPEAKER_00: Like we're all human.
- 36:27SPEAKER_00: It's okay.
- 36:28SPEAKER_00: It's just about having the awareness around it and continuing to do the deeper work so that we become better and better and raise the standard and refine our practices so that everybody can be in a comfortable space.
- 36:45SPEAKER_00: And the other thing I will say is like, I know that like for clients that I've had who have come out of really negative experiences with other coaches, like there's always a learning in that for them, too, right?
- 36:59SPEAKER_00: Like there's always something in that for them that brings them to a deeper level of awareness around themselves, or, you know, brings them to a deeper level of power around themselves or brings them to a deeper level in their own intuition.
- 37:14SPEAKER_00: Because what I always say is the best way to develop your intuition is through looking back at other experiences when you didn't listen to it and being like, oh yeah, that was my intuition telling me this, but I ignored it.
- 37:28SPEAKER_00: And that's the best way to develop it.
- 37:30SPEAKER_00: So sometimes getting involved in those types of situations is a gift through the learning and evolution that it creates.
- 37:37SPEAKER_00: But it's also, I don't want to say it's necessary because it's not.
- 37:41SPEAKER_00: And I think that just because the coaching industry has just blown up so much, there has been a way where some of these things have been overlooked that might be more things that are skills and training in, you know, more of the mental health space.
- 37:58SPEAKER_00: And not to say that that space is amazing either, because I think there's a lot of people that are just a lot of things that are missed in those types of trainings too, because there's so much nuance around trauma.
- 38:10SPEAKER_00: And in the mental health field, there's not really a lot of talk around like past life trauma or ancestral trauma or some of these deeper energetics that I talk about and other people talk about.
- 38:22SPEAKER_00: So that's not perfect either.
- 38:24SPEAKER_00: But it is just about having a desire to always be in the highest level of integrity with yourself and your clients so that people can get the results that they desire and also feel the level of unconditional love and support from a place of neutrality and clarity where there's nothing underlying in the relationship.
- 38:50SPEAKER_00: There's no underlying dynamics, there's no pulling, there's no pushing, there's no needs.
- 38:55SPEAKER_00: It's just a clear, supportive relationship because that's when people grow the fastest, is when they have a clear level of presence from somebody who wants nothing from them.
- 39:07SPEAKER_00: That is one of the most healing things that anybody can experience on this planet.
- 39:12SPEAKER_00: And I know that from experience on both sides.
- 39:16SPEAKER_00: So again, this was not at all to talk bad about anybody.
- 39:23SPEAKER_00: It is just something that I wanted to bring to light and I wanted to start the conversation around of how we can evolve in this way and raise the standards in the coaching industry.
- 39:35SPEAKER_00: So if you have questions about anything that I spoke about, please feel free to reach out.
- 39:40SPEAKER_00: If you are interested in learning from this perspective and learning more about this, the certification program is really the space for that.
- 39:50SPEAKER_00: We're in it now and it doesn't start again until early next year in February.
- 39:55SPEAKER_00: But if that's something you're interested in, reach out to me now because you know I've let people join early and you can do an extended payment plan and it makes it a lot easier when you start to have those lower payments.
- 40:08SPEAKER_00: So it's always an option if that's something where you're like, oh my God, I need to know more about this.
- 40:12SPEAKER_00: I want to get really good at this, and I just want to be able to get long-lasting results for my clients, then reach out to me about that.
- 40:20SPEAKER_00: I just wanted to start a conversation and I'd love to hear your thoughts about it.
- 40:24SPEAKER_00: You can DM me on Instagram or email me info at elisebreeze.com and just let me know your thoughts.
- 40:31SPEAKER_00: Also, don't forget to rate and review the show because you will get a credit for$250 to anything in my world.
- 40:40SPEAKER_00: Also, if you want to join the Sacred Money Mind and you've never reviewed the podcast, review the podcast, and that will be your ticket into the Sacred Money Mind.
- 40:48SPEAKER_00: It's like a no-brainer.
- 40:50SPEAKER_00: Okay, I'm sending you guys so much love and I will talk to you soon.
- 40:54SPEAKER_00: Have an amazing weekend.
- 40:57SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much for being here.
- 40:59SPEAKER_00: Don't forget to subscribe to the show, leave a review, and share the show with your friends who you know are yearning for this type of content.
- 41:06SPEAKER_00: When you leave a review, send us a screenshot and we'll send you a$250 credit you can apply to anything else in my world.
- 41:13SPEAKER_00: You can stay connected with me by following me on Instagram at Elise underscore breeds and by joining my Facebook group, Financial Freedom for Spiritual Entrepreneurs, where I share all of my most fun and potent content.
- 41:25SPEAKER_00: Make sure you download my breathwork for financial freedom at elisebreeds.com.
- 41:29SPEAKER_00: See you next time.