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5-MINUTE FRIDAY: Well, This Is Awkward · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

• 0:19
  Speaker 1: What is going on? Everyone?
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: Emily body here bringing you five Minute Friday, and I
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: am here to close the loop on something.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: Now.
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: If you're an avid listener to five Minute Friday, then
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: you may recall that I shared a couple of details
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: about a date that I went on, like now at
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: this point, over a month and a half ago. And
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: in the tidbit that I shared, it was in response
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: to a listener question that asked me if there had
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: been a particular conversation that really resonated with me lately.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: I'll link to this episode of five Minute Friday in
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: the show notes, but basically, what happened as I went
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: on this date.
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: It didn't shake out.
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: And I really started to get in my head a
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: lot about I mean a lot of things, but in particular,
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: I started to create this story in my head that
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: many of us create when we may be dating, and
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: it's like maybe I wasn't good enough for him, which
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: is bullshit, right, Like it's I just need to make
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: sure that we establish us upfront whoever it is that's
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: going to be the right person for me, and whoever
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: is the right person for you if you haven't found
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: them yet, like this partner will recognize your awesomeness, because
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: there's a lot of awesomeness that you have within you.
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: And if someone doesn't see how great that you are,
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: then you're they're They're not your person anyway. Naturally, however,
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: I got a little down in the dumps, and I
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: was just navigating all of the feelings that go hand
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: in hand with this internal struggle that I've done having
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: that I am so attracted to someone that is well
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: established in their career, perhaps they have made some sort
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: of name for themselves in their industry, and I'm also
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: equally intimidated by this person. And so when this particular
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: man told me that he just wasn't in the place
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: to pursue anything, so to speak, I was like, what
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: am I doing here?
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: Like how am I.
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: Equally attracted to but also like frightened by these quasi
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: successful humans? And like, yeah, I just really had had
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: a moment, maybe a few moments, maybe a little too
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: many moments fretting about this. Anyway, I started to tell
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: myself all these stories in my mind. In my head,
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: that little voice was like not kind. That day, fast
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: forward to Thursday morning, I am on a run at
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: six like thirty five in the morning. I don't want
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: to necessarily be on this run, but I told myself
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: that I was gonna go out and do it. I'm
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: out on the run and I swear, I swear, I swear,
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: I swear. I run by him, and it's literally six
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: thirty five in the morning, and he's chatting to another
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: guy on the street, which like funny time to run
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: into someone on the street. I run by both of them.
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: I swear it was him. And I get to the
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: next block and I stop and I like do a
• 3:34
  Speaker 2: double take, and I'm like, it has to be him.
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: I go on to my destination, get up with some friends,
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: come home, buy myself some sunflowers and a nice coffee,
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: which is my like almost forever gift to myself after
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: I conquer the hardest workout of the week, which in
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: my mind is a tempo run, and I'm like, you
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: know what, I'm just gonna text this guy, oh Man,
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: So I text him and I'm like, I swear I
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: ran by you on Fulton this morning.
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: I hope you're doing well.
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: Because in his little closure note to me, which was
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: a voice note, he said that he'd love to be friends,
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: which like ninety nine point nine percent of the time
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: when a man has told me that he wants to
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: be friends, I'm like, h don't think I'm gonna run
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: with this one. I think I'm going to fall back.
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: I've got some good friends, you know. He messages me.
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: He's like, well, I think it's probably impossible for me
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: to be in the same place at two times, and
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: I was definitely home at that time. Although the guy
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: that you ran by must have been really good looking. Anyway,
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: we go on to chat a little bit and I
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: told him I almost sent him a text after I
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: released the episode of The Five Minute Friday where I
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: mentioned that I told all of you about the conversation
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: that we had about red Flags is what the conversation
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: was about. And he was like, why did you almost
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: send me a text? And so I told him that
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: usually when someone says that they want to be friends
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: after you want to date with them, that they don't
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: really want to be friends and they're just trying to
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: be kind. Anyway, he tells me, he's like, I understand
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: where you're coming from. I'd really love to hear your
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: thoughts about like how everything had gone down from your perspective.
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: You should know that to be honest, my response to
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: us being friends had nothing to do with you. And
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: I really realized after our date that I just wasn't
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: ready to date again after my last relationship. And I
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: was like, wow, I had told myself like the most elaborate.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: A whole story about what was.
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: Wrong with me, which again, I know, I know, I
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: know we've established the right person blah blah blah blah blah.
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: But man, it was such a moment today that I
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: was like, Wow, how easily do we get caught up
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: in all these stories that we are telling ourselves? And
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: I gave this particular scenario that I I'd crafted in
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: my head so much emotional energy, and that's just not
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: what it was.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: It's not what it was a little kick in the
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: pants for me today. I think I've used that phrase
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: on the show before.
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: I don't know why, and when I became a person
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: that says kicking the pants and it's like me trying
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: to avoid cussing anyway, Man, my prompt for you, what
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: story did you tell yourself this week that, honestly, if
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: you take a second and you take a step back,
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: was a bunch of bowl.
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: You know where I'm going with this? Bs.
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: What story did you tell yourself this week that was
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: a bunch of bs.
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: That you gotta let go of?
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: Now, before I bring you today's listener question, I do
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: want to take just a quick second if you don't
• 6:46
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• 6:50
  Speaker 2: right now. If you're one of those people that are
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: going out on your runs or heading outside and not
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: bringing with you a pair of sunglasses, I just don't
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: understand you.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: No offense. Here's the deal. Why squint through all.
• 7:08
  Speaker 2: Of your outdoor activities when you could be wearing a
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• 7:42
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• 7:49
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• 7:54
  Speaker 2: And now man today's episode is all over the place.
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: A listener question.
• 8:01
  Speaker 3: Hi, Emily, thank you so much for your podcast. I
• 8:04
  Speaker 3: listen to them each time a new one comes out,
• 8:06
  Speaker 3: and they make my travel to work so much more enjoyable.
• 8:10
  Speaker 3: I find so much information from them as well. I
• 8:13
  Speaker 3: have a question for you in regards to running training
• 8:16
  Speaker 3: on the treadmill as well as outdoor. I have the
• 8:19
  Speaker 3: Peloton app and I've been doing all of my running
• 8:22
  Speaker 3: on a treadmill inside and I'm just curious in your opinion,
• 8:26
  Speaker 3: is it important to take the training outdoors as well
• 8:30
  Speaker 3: or is training indoor on a treadmill just as efficient.
• 8:34
  Speaker 3: Thank you so much, and I look forward to your
• 8:36
  Speaker 3: future podcast.
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: This is a really great question.
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: So the good news is that treadmill training is definitely effective.
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: I love the treadmill.
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: I lean into it quite often, both in the winter
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: when it's absolutely freezing and in the summer when it
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: is just way too hot to get out there and
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: tackle a run. Now, with that said, researchers found that
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: the biomechanical patterns, so to speak, they don't change when
• 9:07
  Speaker 2: someone runs on a treadmill versus when they run outside.
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: But the thing about running outside is that it's more
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: suited for your natural gate cycle because when you're outside,
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: you're doing all the work yourself, which means that you're
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: not limited to the functionality of the treadmill. And when
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: you're on a treadmill, as you can imagine, you may
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: be encouraged, so to speak, to shorten your stride, if
• 9:32
  Speaker 2: only slightly. Also, when you're running ouside, you're going to
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: be activating a little You're going to be activating more
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: muscles because although you're running forward, you are going at
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: times a little bit side to side. So if you're
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: only running inside, what experts have found is that certain
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: muscles could become a little weak, which could set you
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: up for With that said, I also do want to
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: make sure that I highlight a lot of benefits of
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: treadmill running. Again, sometimes you just can't run outside, so
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: that's a great opportunity to get on the treadmill. Sometimes
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: you're feeling a little unmotivated, or you need a little
• 10:06
  Speaker 2: extra push in the right direction, a the speedier direction,
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: and that's when a treadmill can be really helpful for me.
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: I lean into the tread a lot for tempo running
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: when I'm just like not sure that I have it
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: in me to definitely run that piece on my own,
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: but the tread can be a little bit of a
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: helping hand with that. And the last myth that I
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: want to dispel is that treadmill running can be bad
• 10:28
  Speaker 2: for you. Treadmill running isn't bad for you. In fact,
• 10:31
  Speaker 2: it's obviously a much better option than just laying on
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: your couch all day, being completely sedentary and watching Netflix
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: for hours on end.
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: Although there is a time and a place for that.
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: The only thing I will not I feel like I'm
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: spewing treadmill information at you, is that outside you can
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: run downhill. On a treadmill, you can't run downhill. So
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: that's just one other example of how getting outside tackling
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: natural terrain there are going to be pros and cons
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: and benefits and all the things for all of it.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: That's it for this week.
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: I hope everyone has something beautiful to do over the
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: weekend or over the next few days. Whenever you are
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: listening to this, make sure you're following along with Hurdle
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: Over at Hurdle podcast. I'm over at Emily A Baddi
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: another hurdle conquered. Catch you guys next time.