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The Day Two Missionaries Duked It Out Msg 12 22 · INSIGHT FOR LIVING: Biblical Wisdom For Everyday Living

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Speaker 1: Let me draw your attention to the last six verses
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Speaker 1: of the fifteenth chapter of the Book of Acts. If
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Speaker 1: he'll turn, please in your New Testament to Acts fifteen.
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Speaker 1: I'll begin reading at verse thirty six down to the
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Speaker 1: end of the chapter, verse forty one, Acts fifteen thirty six.
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Speaker 1: After some days, Paul said to Barnabas, let us return
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Speaker 1: and visit the brethren in every city in which we
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Speaker 1: proclaimed the word of the Lord, and see how they are.
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Speaker 1: Barnabas wanted to take John called Mark along with them also,
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Speaker 1: but Paul kept insisting that they should not take him along,
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Speaker 1: who had deserted them in Pamphylia and had not gone
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Speaker 1: with them to the work. And there occurred such a
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Speaker 1: sharp disagreement that they separated from one another, and Barnabas
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Speaker 1: took Mark with him and sailed away to Cyprus. But
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Speaker 1: Paul shows Silas and left being committed by the brethren
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Speaker 1: to the grace of the Lord, and he was traveling
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Speaker 1: through Syria and Celicia, strengthening the churches. Something sounds so
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Speaker 1: outrageous when we hear them, we can hardly imagine they're
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Speaker 1: really happening. For example, several years ago I heard about
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Speaker 1: a young interviewer who was spending time with the late
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Speaker 1: little Catholic nun mother Teresa, and he was curious about
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Speaker 1: a number of things that had never been asked her,
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Speaker 1: so he decided to ask her if she had any
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Speaker 1: other dreams in life. Did she ever want to be
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Speaker 1: anything other than who she is? And she said to him,
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Speaker 1: to everyone's surprise, well, I always wanted to be a
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Speaker 1: flight attendant. Now, when I heard that, it seemed outrageous
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Speaker 1: to me to think of Mother Teresa handing people cokes
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Speaker 1: and coffee and serving them little toy meals on an airplane.
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Speaker 1: It just didn't seem right. One of my all time
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Speaker 1: favorites is the story of a grandmother who had a
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Speaker 1: rather precocious seven year old granddaughter who was determined to
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Speaker 1: find out how old her grandmother was, and grandmother wouldn't
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Speaker 1: tell her, and the girl kept pestering her, and she said,
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Speaker 1: I'm not going to tell you my age. Only your
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Speaker 1: granddaddy knows how old I am, and you don't need
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Speaker 1: to know. It doesn't matter. And she was fixing supper
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Speaker 1: one evening, and the little girl was much too quiet,
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Speaker 1: and so the grandmother slipped upstairs to her own bedroom
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Speaker 1: and walked in and there was the little girl with
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Speaker 1: the contents of the grandmother's purse filled out on her
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Speaker 1: lap on top of the bed, and she had her
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Speaker 1: driver's license. And she said to her grandmother when she
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Speaker 1: walked in, you're seventy three years old. She said, well, yes,
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Speaker 1: I am. How do you know that? She said, well,
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Speaker 1: I see the date of your birthday here and I
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Speaker 1: subtracted that from this year, and you're seven three. She
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Speaker 1: kept looking at it, she said, you also made an
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Speaker 1: f in sex. You know, you don't You don't think
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Speaker 1: of a seven year old as saying something like that.
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Speaker 1: It seems a little outrageous for a child to make
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Speaker 1: a statement like that. And speaking of outrageous, you know,
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Speaker 1: the Day two Missionaries Duked it Out is a sermon
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Speaker 1: title that just sort of grabs you when you look
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Speaker 1: at it, and it just seems too outrageous to imagine.
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Speaker 1: I mean, missionaries don't duke it out. They don't even
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Speaker 1: argue a matter of fact. All they do is pray
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Speaker 1: and talk about Jesus. But you smile down inside if
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Speaker 1: you are a missionary and you hear that, or if
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Speaker 1: you've been with them, because you know that they are
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Speaker 1: real people, just like any others of us. And there
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Speaker 1: was a day when and if they hadn't controlled themselves,
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Speaker 1: they would have literally had a fight. I'm convinced. And
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Speaker 1: these are not wild eyed carnal men who were out
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Speaker 1: to get one another. These are the men that we've
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Speaker 1: respected now for quite some time. Paul and Barnabas. I mean,
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Speaker 1: it's amazing. It's outrageous to think that men who are
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Speaker 1: this mature and this godly, and I mean that sincerely,
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Speaker 1: who have had these seasoned years of knowing and walking
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Speaker 1: with God, who would stand toe to toe against one
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Speaker 1: another and be engaged in an argument so heated that
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Speaker 1: they could no longer work together, nor did they ever again.
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Speaker 1: One of the things that has attracted me to the
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Speaker 1: Bible through the years has been its realism. When God
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Speaker 1: paints his people in the scriptures, he paints them warts
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Speaker 1: and all, unlike us who would prefer to airbrush them.
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Speaker 1: God shows us the whole truth. But he presents Moses.
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Speaker 1: He doesn't hide the fact that he once murdered an Egyptian,
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Speaker 1: but he gives us David. He doesn't keep us from
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Speaker 1: that walk on the roof of the palace, and the
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Speaker 1: adultery that followed and the murder of Bathsheba's husband. And
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Speaker 1: an evangelist like Jonah who had the chance of a
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Speaker 1: lifetime to lead the largest revival in the history of time,
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Speaker 1: doesn't keep us from seeing him and all of his
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Speaker 1: skepticism and ugly racial prejudice. And see Paul and Barnabas
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Speaker 1: and the last few verses of Acts fifteen. Here they
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Speaker 1: are outrageous, though it may seem in such a heated
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Speaker 1: argument that they literally could never come to terms with it,
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Speaker 1: and they separated, never to return again to a mutual ministry.
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Speaker 1: Let's remember where we are here. Paul and his wonderfully close,
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Speaker 1: perhaps closest of all friends, Barnabas, have finished the first journey,
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Speaker 1: and they've set new records, founded churches, and endured persecution.
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Speaker 1: And Paul now bore the marks of a stoning from Listra.
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Speaker 1: And they returned with wonderful reports of God's taking his
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Speaker 1: grace to the Gentiles. And they spend a long time
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Speaker 1: in Antioch after the report, and then right on the
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Speaker 1: heels of this they are leaders, and has come to
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Speaker 1: be known as the Jerusalem Council. Firse thirty five verses
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Speaker 1: of Acts fifteen tell us of how these thoughtful and
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Speaker 1: carefully thinking theologians hammered away at the grace of God
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Speaker 1: and determined that gentiles do not need to be Jewish
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Speaker 1: in order to be believers. Those some said, they must
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Speaker 1: be circumcised, and they must keep the Sabbath, and they
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Speaker 1: must order their lives according to the law. Paul and
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Speaker 1: Barnabas and Silas and others like James said, no, no,
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Speaker 1: if a Gentile comes to Christ, if a Jew comes
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Speaker 1: to Christ, it is all by grace through faith. Apart
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Speaker 1: from works based on the finished work at the Cross,
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Speaker 1: where Christ paid the penalty for their sins as he
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Speaker 1: paid him for hours. They remained a long time according
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Speaker 1: to verse thirty five, where they teach and preach the
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Speaker 1: word of the Lord. Chapter fifteen, Verse thirty five, These
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Speaker 1: are the kind of men we're talking about. These are
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Speaker 1: the man you and I would stand in line to
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Speaker 1: be with, to spend an evening with. This is Paul
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Speaker 1: and this is Barnabas. Who would ever expect anything near
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Speaker 1: a disagreement, to say nothing of a heated argument between
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Speaker 1: men like that? So much for the setting. It all
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Speaker 1: began with an idea. Paul's idea verse thirty six. Let's
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Speaker 1: return and visit the brethren in every city in which
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Speaker 1: we proclaim the word of the Lord, and see how
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Speaker 1: they are. How wholesome, Let's return, how helpful, Let's visit
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Speaker 1: the brethren, and how exciting, Let's see how they are.
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Speaker 1: Let's go together. We've done it before, Barnabas, and there
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Speaker 1: will be less surprises. And these are godly men doing
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Speaker 1: godly things, theological issues being resolved, and the Word of
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Speaker 1: the Lord being taught between them. What a great idea.
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Speaker 1: And Barnabas responded, great thought, Let's do it. Let's take
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Speaker 1: John Mark with us as we go the second time
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Speaker 1: verse thirty eight. Said no, John Mark won't be going,
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Speaker 1: and Barnabas said, oh yes he will. And Paul said, oh, no,
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Speaker 1: he won't, and Barnabas said, oh yes he will verse
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Speaker 1: thirty nine. And there occurred such a sharp disagreement that
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Speaker 1: they separated from one another. The idea wasn't the problem.
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Speaker 1: Both of them wanted to go. It's what followed the
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Speaker 1: idea that created the rift, and they showed themselves warts
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Speaker 1: and all. Campbell Morgan writes of this encounter, I'm greatly
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Speaker 1: comforted whenever I read this, I'm thankful for the revelation
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Speaker 1: of the humanity of these men. If I had never
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Speaker 1: read that Paul and Barnabas had a contention, I should
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Speaker 1: have been afraid. These men were not angels. They were men.
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Speaker 1: It's a good word. They're good men, they're godly men.
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Speaker 1: But they're not perfect men. And it must have hit
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Speaker 1: Paul wrong to think that Barnabas would have a wild
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Speaker 1: idea like taking along a defector. I like the words
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Speaker 1: of doctor Bob Cook, God reserves the right to use
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Speaker 1: people who disagree with me. We come along ways in
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Speaker 1: life when we realize that there may be another idea
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Speaker 1: outside the one we thought of, that goes even further
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Speaker 1: that God may be pleased to bless. This is a
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Speaker 1: good time for me to pause and share with you
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Speaker 1: maybe two or three very important things to remember regarding disagreements.
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Speaker 1: I don't often ask you to do this, but somewhere
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Speaker 1: in your printed materials, find a place where you might
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Speaker 1: be able to write some things down. Maybe you'll never
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Speaker 1: have another disagreement, but I think I will have some,
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Speaker 1: and I've written them down, and I think it might
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Speaker 1: be helpful should that occur in your life to be
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Speaker 1: able to go back to these three things and to
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Speaker 1: review them. Here's the first. In every disagreement, there are
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Speaker 1: the same two ingredients. In every disagreement, there are the
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Speaker 1: same two ingredients. First is an issue. The issue is
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Speaker 1: objective and it involves principles. There's an issue at stake,
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Speaker 1: and it's clearly stated, and there are principles that surround it.
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Speaker 1: Here's the second ingredient, various viewpoints, and the viewpoints are
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Speaker 1: subjective and they involve personalities. You look at it one way,
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Speaker 1: and if I may, your wife looks at it another way.
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Speaker 1: You look at it one way, and your son, our
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Speaker 1: daughter looks at it another way. You look at it
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Speaker 1: one way and your roommate at school looks at it
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Speaker 1: another way. It's very subjective, and the way we look
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Speaker 1: at it has a lot to do with how we're
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Speaker 1: put together why it involves personalities. If you can keep
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Speaker 1: those simple factors in mind, it will really keep the
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Speaker 1: heat down so that you can work your way through
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Speaker 1: an argument rather than stomp out in the middle of it.
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Speaker 1: There is an issue that involves principles, and they are
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Speaker 1: looked at from different perspectives. In fact, I could put
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Speaker 1: together a definition of a disagreement. Having said what I've
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Speaker 1: just said, A disagreement is a conflict that involves an
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Speaker 1: issue seen from opposing points of view. It's an issue
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Speaker 1: that is looked at from different or opposing points of view.
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Speaker 1: This is the issue, This is how I see it,
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Speaker 1: says Paul. No, this is how I see it, says Barnabus.
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Speaker 1: That brings up a second comment. In many disagreements, each
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Speaker 1: side has validity. Both sides have strengths. Sure, every argument
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Speaker 1: has its weaknesses, but both sides have their strengths. Neither
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Speaker 1: side is what I would call a slam dunk. If
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Speaker 1: it were true, there wouldn't be an argument. Of course,
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Speaker 1: from your point of view, it is a slam dunk.
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Speaker 1: Or from my point of view, it's so obvious, I'm
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Speaker 1: surprised the other person doesn't see it. But there are
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Speaker 1: strengths In most every disagreement. Both sides have validity. Here's
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Speaker 1: a third comment I would add. In heated disagreements, someone
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Speaker 1: usually gets hurt. In heated disagreements, someone usually gets hurt.
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Speaker 1: And by the way, the higher the heat, the deeper
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Speaker 1: the hurt. The deeper the hurt. I don't care what
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Speaker 1: level of maturity you have reached in your walk with
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Speaker 1: christ you are not immune to her. Words strike like
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Speaker 1: shrapnel embedded in the brain, and you don't forget them,
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Speaker 1: especially if during the argument character assassination occurs someone calls
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Speaker 1: you a name or implies a certain thing about your character.
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Speaker 1: I know a friend who is in his late seventies
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Speaker 1: who can still remember decades ago when his father in law,
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Speaker 1: in front of the whole family clan on a Thanksgiving afternoon,
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Speaker 1: looked at his son in law and said, you know,
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Speaker 1: he called his name. I never had much use for
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Speaker 1: you anyway. And this man, now white haired, really getting
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Speaker 1: up in years, remembers not only the words, but the
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Speaker 1: feelings and even the tone of that statement that Thanksgiving afternoon.
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Speaker 1: It hit like shrapnel. In heated disagreement, someone usually gets hurt.
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Speaker 1: Now I give you those three not because they're all
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Speaker 1: that great or insightful, but they're necessary to remember. If
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Speaker 1: you and I will remember those three statements, it will
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Speaker 1: help in the next argument. It will help you become
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Speaker 1: a little more objective. Now I'm going to ask you
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Speaker 1: to sit behind the bench. You're the judge today. We're
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Speaker 1: going to work hard at being neutral because we like
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Speaker 1: both Paul and Barnabas. Some of us are more like
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Speaker 1: Barnabas than we are like Paul. Others of us are
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Speaker 1: more like Paul than Barnabas. And to be sure, they
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Speaker 1: are from a little different background and they see things differently,
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Speaker 1: which is what happened in this case. Now, what is
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Speaker 1: the issue? The issue, objectively stated is should a person
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Speaker 1: who has walked away from a serious responsibility be given
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Speaker 1: a second chance? Word did another way, should someone who
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Speaker 1: leaves people in the lurch be allowed to go again
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Speaker 1: on a similar mission. Barnabas says yes by all means.
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Speaker 1: Paul answers no, absolutely not. Obviously they have opposing points
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Speaker 1: of view in this particular issue. What's Barnabas thinking when
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Speaker 1: we read Barnabas wanted to take John Mark, don't think
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Speaker 1: it was just sort of a shrug, kind of like
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Speaker 1: a nice idea, would you please? May i? Paul? This
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Speaker 1: word wanted is in the imperfect tense in the Greek,
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Speaker 1: and it is from a word that means to will something.
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Speaker 1: I'm telling you Barnabas willed it and wished it and
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Speaker 1: stuck by his guns. The young man is going. He
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Speaker 1: has every right to take it, to take the trip
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Speaker 1: with us. Sure he failed, Sure he walked away. But Paul,
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Speaker 1: nobody's perfect. He was young and inexperienced several years ago.
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Speaker 1: He blew it only once and we still made it. Yes,
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Speaker 1: it was hard, but we made it, and we had
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Speaker 1: a difficult time, and we missed him. But he's learned
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Speaker 1: a lot from this experience, and I know he's willing
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Speaker 1: to go again. He not only needs our encouragement, he
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Speaker 1: could use our endorsement. And what else are mentors for
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Speaker 1: for if not to give us endorsement when we are weak.
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Speaker 1: One of the reasons you have been your mentor has
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Speaker 1: endeared herself or himself to you is because they stood
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Speaker 1: with you when most people stood against you. They were there.
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Speaker 1: Barnabas says, this is our chance, and you can't forget
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Speaker 1: they were cousins. They were The letter to the Colossians
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Speaker 1: tells us that Barnabas and John Mark were cousins, and
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Speaker 1: when blood enters into it, it's almost impossible to be
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Speaker 1: completely objective. Because of that and other reasons, Barnabas wanted
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Speaker 1: to take John Mark Paul's response in verse thirty eight,
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Speaker 1: The imperfect here again is revealed in the way it's
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Speaker 1: translated kept on, insisting that they should not take him along.
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Speaker 1: Can't you hear, Paul, He has proven himself a quitter
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Speaker 1: earlier faithfulness in his job one in God's among God's servants. Remember,
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Speaker 1: Barnabas is looking at the man. Paul is looking at
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Speaker 1: the principle. Barnabas is looking ahead, Paul is looking back.
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Speaker 1: We'll need strength, We'll need stability. We need someone with
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Speaker 1: a proven track record. If we thought it was hard
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Speaker 1: the first trip, can you imagine what we're going to
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Speaker 1: encounter on the second time around. We need confidence if
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Speaker 1: we're going to lean on this man and rely on
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Speaker 1: him to be there, need him. But Paul, you're the
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Speaker 1: preacher of grace. The book is full of people who
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Speaker 1: have flown higher even though they failed. Moses was a murderer,
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Speaker 1: Jeptha was rash in his judgment. Rahab the harlot Jonah
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Speaker 1: a racist. Paul, you yourself wants a persecutor. It's tough,
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Speaker 1: isn't it. It's a tough decision to go with this.
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Speaker 1: And some of you are feeling very magnanimous right now.
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Speaker 1: You're thinking, well, Paul, get with it. Would you loan
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Speaker 1: money to a person who didn't pay office first amount
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Speaker 1: that he borrowed from you. Would you loan him more money?
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Speaker 1: Would you loan him your car? If you wreck the
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Speaker 1: other one? Would you let him stay in your house
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Speaker 1: if they tore up the other apartment? When you let
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Speaker 1: them stay before, suddenly it gets a little bit uneasy,
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Speaker 1: and that's why it says there was a sharp disagreement.
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Speaker 1: I'm sure Paul could have quoted confidence in an unfaithful
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Speaker 1: man in time of trouble is like a broken tooth
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Speaker 1: and a foot out of joint Proverbs twenty five nineteen.
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Speaker 1: It's a verse. Literally, it says, putting your trust in
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Speaker 1: an unreliable man is like chewing on a sore tooth
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Speaker 1: or trying to run on a broken foot. You ever
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Speaker 1: done that? Ever had somebody else leave you in the lurch,
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Speaker 1: and you're left with the whole shooting match. I'm sure
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Speaker 1: Barnabus could have quoted David the Adulterer. He pardons all
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Speaker 1: our in equities. As far as the east is from
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Speaker 1: the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us?
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Speaker 1: I waited patiently for the Lord, and he inclined unto me,
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Speaker 1: and heard my cry. He lifted me up out of
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Speaker 1: a horrible pit, and put my feet on a rock
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Speaker 1: and established my going, and put a new song in
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Speaker 1: my mouth, even praise to our God. God is a
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Speaker 1: god of second chances. It's funny what verses we turn
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Speaker 1: to to support our position. His compassions fail not. They
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Speaker 1: are new every morning. Great is thy faithfulness. When my
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Speaker 1: wife and I have an argument every decade or so,
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Speaker 1: I like to refer to verses of scripture that help.
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Speaker 1: And then I have to get used to sleeping on
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Speaker 1: the patio for a while and till she tells me
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Speaker 1: where she hid the key, and then I get back in.
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Speaker 1: We have a little fun with it, but the fact
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Speaker 1: is there was no reconciliation. They never even came halfway before.
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Speaker 1: It just drains off in your mind as black print
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Speaker 1: on white pages. It's like hearing screaming and shouting and
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Speaker 1: arguing in the senior pastor's office and you hear the
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Speaker 1: other voice and it's another staff member and you blush
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Speaker 1: with embarrassment, and it is really heated, and it is
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Speaker 1: really ugly. That's what we have here. There occurred such
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Speaker 1: a sharp disagreement para Christmas. We get our work word
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Speaker 1: paroxysm from it. Paracuno means to sharpen, as you would
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Speaker 1: sharpen the blade of a knife. You could cut the
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Speaker 1: atmosphere with a knife. This is one intense argument, and
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Speaker 1: neither is giving ground. And it led to a separation
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Speaker 1: from one another. And you don't read again of the
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Speaker 1: ministry of Barnabas. You never read again of the companionship
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Speaker 1: of Paul with his longtime friend. John Pollock writes wisely,
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Speaker 1: there must have been serious wrong in a situation which
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Speaker 1: made the lovable, even tempered Barnabas use angry words, and
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Speaker 1: Paul had far to go before he could write. Love
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Speaker 1: his patient and kind love does not insist on its
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Speaker 1: own way. I think Pollock is right. I don't like
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Speaker 1: having this in the scriptures. I don't I want to
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Speaker 1: take it away, but I can't. I can't do that
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Speaker 1: anymore than I can erase the argument you have had.
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Speaker 1: And you still linger over though it's been months months
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Speaker 1: past since the words were used, and you still drag
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Speaker 1: the anchor or she does or he does. There are
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Speaker 1: Christians today that won't talk to each other. Christians going
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Speaker 1: to the same heaven. They'll have to talk on the
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Speaker 1: way up, because they've got an eternity to spend together.
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Speaker 1: It'll be no problem then, because the old nature will
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Speaker 1: be gone and will be freed from all those hang ups.
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Speaker 1: Are you from former mate and you live in the
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Speaker 1: bitterness and the blame of her wrong or his or
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Speaker 1: you're spreading that venom to one of your children or
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Speaker 1: somebody's grandchild. Come on, come on, what do we do
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Speaker 1: about this? What I have said? Had I been available,
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Speaker 1: and had they even thought of asking what I would say,
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Speaker 1: I probably would have listened to the argument, which may
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Speaker 1: have gone something like this, John Mark, we can't take John.
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Speaker 1: He failed us last time. But that was last time. Wait, wait, wait, Barnabas,
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Speaker 1: he's likely to fail us again. He's a deserter at heart,
26:56
Speaker 1: but he's had time to think it over. Paul. We've
27:00
Speaker 1: got to give him another chance. He's got the makings
27:02
Speaker 1: of a great missionary. Tell me, Barnabas, isn't it because
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Speaker 1: he's your cousin you want to take him again? That's
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Speaker 1: not fair, Paul. You know I've tried to help many
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Speaker 1: people who aren't related to me. I'm convinced this young
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Speaker 1: man needs understanding and he needs our encouragement. He could
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Speaker 1: be a great evangelist, Someday we need someone who can
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Speaker 1: stand in the gap. Barnabas stand up to persecution and
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Speaker 1: angry mobs and beatings and even time in jail. Our
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Speaker 1: team has to be close knit and thoroughly reliable. How
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Speaker 1: can we trust a man who failed like John Mark? No,
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Speaker 1: Barnabas remember the words of the Master. No man who
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Speaker 1: puts his hand to the plow and looks back as
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Speaker 1: fit for the Kingdom of God. I've talked to him
27:46
Speaker 1: about his failure. I'm sure he won't defect again. It's
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Speaker 1: too soon to trust him. Paul. Remember how soon after
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Speaker 1: your conversion I took a chance on you. The apostles
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Speaker 1: were afraid of you, thinking you were faking your version
28:00
Speaker 1: in order to infiltrate the church at Jerusalem. I didn't
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Speaker 1: make you prove yourself at first. I'd rather not keep
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Speaker 1: John Mark waiting. I vouch for him today at Robertson writes,
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Speaker 1: no one can rightly blame Barnabas for giving his cousin
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Speaker 1: John Mark a second chance, nor Paul for fearing to
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Speaker 1: risk him again. One's judgment may go with Paul, but
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Speaker 1: one's heart goes with Barnubus. So what would I say,
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Speaker 1: I've thought about this for hours. I've had my own
28:42
Speaker 1: share of arguments, I am sad to tell you, and
28:46
Speaker 1: you've had yours. I've had some that were never reconciled.
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Speaker 1: I've had most that have been, thankfully. And I've learned
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Speaker 1: in these years on this earth that there there are
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Speaker 1: some lessons that stay with us, that work, and I
29:05
Speaker 1: want to give them to you. I want to share them,
29:08
Speaker 1: and I want to remember them the next time, if
29:10
Speaker 1: there is another the next time I'm engaged in something
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Speaker 1: anywhere near this heated I want to remember these four lessons.
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Speaker 1: Here's the first. When in a disagreement, work hard at
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Speaker 1: seeing the other point of view. When in a disagreement,
29:32
Speaker 1: work hard to see the other point of view. It
29:36
Speaker 1: begins with listening. And let me tell you, it will
29:39
Speaker 1: take three qualities that don't come easily. It will take honesty,
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Speaker 1: it will take objectivity, it will take humility, none of
29:49
Speaker 1: which you're easy, none of which come naturally. Philippians two,
29:57
Speaker 1: three and four talks about not doing things for our
29:59
Speaker 1: ow own benefit, but for the benefit of another. Don't
30:03
Speaker 1: look only at your own point of view, we would
30:06
Speaker 1: paraphrase paraphrase, but look at the view of the other.
30:12
Speaker 1: Remember I use the words work hard. It's hard work
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Speaker 1: to put yourself in the other persons choose the disagreement
30:21
Speaker 1: will never find any path toward reconciliation until we do that.
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Speaker 1: That brings me to the second. When both sides have
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Speaker 1: good support, and they often do, seek a wise compromise.
30:40
Speaker 1: When both sides have good support, seek a wise compromise. Now,
30:48
Speaker 1: I could tell by the way some of you bristled
30:50
Speaker 1: when I said that, I watch you rather closely. Compromise
30:55
Speaker 1: is not a word you've been raised with. If you've
30:59
Speaker 1: got back, you don't give in, you stand for heim.
31:06
Speaker 1: I know I was raised like that, and I sometime
31:11
Speaker 1: appreciate gristle and backbone. But I'll tell you I admire
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Speaker 1: more a person who can negotiate compromise without giving up
31:19
Speaker 1: any moral or ethical principles. There's a lot more wobble
31:23
Speaker 1: room than most of us want to give credit to
31:25
Speaker 1: any argument. One man writes, could Paul or Barnabus or
31:30
Speaker 1: both have developed a reasonable compromise giving in would not
31:34
Speaker 1: have met heresy, for no doctrine was involved. Could Paul
31:39
Speaker 1: have said, we'll tell him he's on probation if he
31:42
Speaker 1: doesn't work out the first month, we'll send him home again.
31:45
Speaker 1: Or Barnabus perhaps could have conceded we do need dedicated
31:50
Speaker 1: workers on our team. Let's give Mark a minor assignment
31:52
Speaker 1: here at home. See how he does. Meanwhile, we'll start
31:56
Speaker 1: our journey. If he measures up, we'll send for him
31:58
Speaker 1: and he can join us along the way. Or they
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Speaker 1: could have agreed on a contingent plan. Let's take Mark,
32:05
Speaker 1: but others also. If Mark does desert us again, we'll
32:09
Speaker 1: have others to fall back on. The compromises. The only
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Speaker 1: way nations outside of war saw their battles is people
32:20
Speaker 1: sit at tables and look at one another and talk
32:22
Speaker 1: about it. My dad used to say, be careful. You
32:26
Speaker 1: have two fists in one mouth. The great tendency is
32:32
Speaker 1: to swing your fists, But intelligent people use their mouths.
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Speaker 1: He was right. When both sides have good support, seek
32:44
Speaker 1: a wise compromise. Here's a third. When the conflict persists,
32:52
Speaker 1: care enough to work it through rather than walk out.
32:58
Speaker 1: When the conflicts this care enough to work it through
33:03
Speaker 1: rather than walk out. Let me tell you what solves nothing.
33:08
Speaker 1: Slamming a phone down in the middle of a conversation
33:13
Speaker 1: or slamming a door as you stomp out or a lengthy,
33:18
Speaker 1: needless silent treatment, or bolting from a marriage, or quitting
33:26
Speaker 1: your job in the heated moment of difficulty breaking a
33:33
Speaker 1: long term relationship with a friend or one of your
33:35
Speaker 1: own family members. Work it through, Work it through, stay
33:45
Speaker 1: at it. It's the hardest work you'll do, but it's
33:49
Speaker 1: the most rewarding. Now, I'm a realist, and so I
33:54
Speaker 1: have to bring the forth when it cannot be resolved,
33:59
Speaker 1: gracious agree to disagree without becoming disagreeable. When it cannot
34:10
Speaker 1: be resolved, graciously agree to disagree without becoming disagreeable. You know,
34:16
Speaker 1: I think they did that. Not once does Paul write
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Speaker 1: against Barnabas in all of his letters, Not one slam.
34:24
Speaker 1: Not once does Barnabus take on Paul with a group
34:26
Speaker 1: of friends and say, but if you knew the man
34:29
Speaker 1: like I know him, then you finish the sentence? Can
34:33
Speaker 1: I add the words and get over it and just
34:38
Speaker 1: get on with life? You know, I didn't know the
34:40
Speaker 1: South lost until I was in the tenth grade in
34:43
Speaker 1: high school. I just thought we ran out of time
34:47
Speaker 1: and ammunition and money and territory. And finally I had
34:53
Speaker 1: a very reliable American history teacher who convinced me we
34:57
Speaker 1: lost some of You can't get beyond the Mason Dixon line.
35:03
Speaker 1: You just can't get there, get there. We lost. Your
35:11
Speaker 1: daughter wants to marry a Yankee. It's okay, just be
35:17
Speaker 1: sure they're marry in Texas. Don't clap. That's it's a joe.
35:27
Speaker 1: It is a good idea, not amazing. When you meet
35:34
Speaker 1: up with people, they'll sometime bring up a deal from
35:37
Speaker 1: a wound that was cut open in nineteen seventy seven,
35:43
Speaker 1: or they'll bring up a marriage that was over in
35:44
Speaker 1: nineteen eighty four, or they talk about not getting voted
35:48
Speaker 1: into office because of some shlock back in nineteen ninety one,
35:52
Speaker 1: and you don't even remember the names, and frankly, you
35:58
Speaker 1: don't care. They care, and so they live in the
36:02
Speaker 1: swarm and the swell of the puss. They've never gotten
36:08
Speaker 1: over it. I don't think there's any puss in this wound.
36:12
Speaker 1: I think there was a sharp disagreement, and I don't
36:15
Speaker 1: think Paul and Barnabus work together again. But you know
36:25
Speaker 1: it all worked out. Tell you the truth. Not all
36:30
Speaker 1: separations lead to bad conclusions. Some of the greatest seminaries
36:34
Speaker 1: in the world began because they split off from seminaries
36:37
Speaker 1: going south. I shouldn't say south, I should say going left.
36:43
Speaker 1: That's it. Some of the finest schools in the country
36:47
Speaker 1: started because of difficulties in the administration and the faculty,
36:53
Speaker 1: and they decided to start another school. Some mighty fine
36:55
Speaker 1: churches started from splits. Not a lot, but some mighty finements.
37:04
Speaker 1: Some awfully good second marriages emerged from terrible first marriages.
37:08
Speaker 1: Though there were heartaches in the first one d and abiding.
37:16
Speaker 1: The reason is they got over them. I want you
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Speaker 1: to remember if these words in essentials, unity in non essentials,
37:27
Speaker 1: liberty in all things charity, once again, in essentials, unity
37:38
Speaker 1: in non essentials, liberty in all things charity, got it,
37:48
Speaker 1: Let's do it in essentials, unity in non essentials, liberty
37:56
Speaker 1: in all things charity. What a way to live. Father,
38:05
Speaker 1: forgive them, for they don't know what they're doing. As
38:11
Speaker 1: he hung with Roman spikes in his hands and in
38:15
Speaker 1: his feet as he died, Father, they don't know what
38:21
Speaker 1: they're doing. And he paid the penalty in full for
38:27
Speaker 1: the sins of the whole world, and there was reconciliation
38:34
Speaker 1: between God and man, and he paid the complete price,
38:45
Speaker 1: though he didn't deserve a bit of it. Praise his name.
38:57
Speaker 1: I'm like just a bow together. I'd like you to
39:03
Speaker 1: close your eyes. I'd like you to revisit your own
39:07
Speaker 1: wounded world, where you will see the face of a parent,
39:14
Speaker 1: or a child, or a friend, former mate, fellow employee
39:22
Speaker 1: of years ago, a boss, a coach, a pastor, a guardian,
39:30
Speaker 1: some authority figure, some counselor somebody, a sibling. It's time,
39:49
Speaker 1: women and men, it's time to get on with it.
39:56
Speaker 1: It's time to let it go. Separate, fine, but get
40:02
Speaker 1: on with it. If you can't reconcile, that's a big if.
40:09
Speaker 1: Get on with your life. We don't need the poison.
40:15
Speaker 1: We have enough of it to wade through in our
40:18
Speaker 1: own lives. Right now, stand at the foot of the cross,
40:27
Speaker 1: look up to him, see him hanging there, bleeding and dying,
40:37
Speaker 1: that he might give us the gift of forgiveness which
40:42
Speaker 1: we did never deserve, and a fulfilling life which we
40:48
Speaker 1: could never earn. It's called grace because he forgave us.
40:58
Speaker 1: He went the whole way. We went none of it,
41:04
Speaker 1: and he did it because he loves and he did
41:10
Speaker 1: it because he wanted our love and return. Maybe that
41:17
Speaker 1: you have a little homework to take care of. You
41:23
Speaker 1: may have never come to the Lord Jesus Christ personally.
41:28
Speaker 1: It's maybe the first time you ever saw it. In
41:30
Speaker 1: light of all of this, wouldn't it be a great
41:34
Speaker 1: day to trust him, give your heart holy to him.
41:41
Speaker 1: Maybe there's a phone call you need to make, Maybe
41:44
Speaker 1: there's a visit you need to pay, or a letter
41:48
Speaker 1: to write. If they're dead, it might help to go
41:52
Speaker 1: to the grave site or go to a good counselor
41:57
Speaker 1: and pour out your soul and get rid of the
42:00
Speaker 1: venom and release it. Best of all that you just
42:09
Speaker 1: do it face to face. Lord God, thank you for
42:20
Speaker 1: the mighty victory that was wrought in Christ at Calvary.
42:26
Speaker 1: Thank you for spanning the gap between our sin and
42:31
Speaker 1: your righteousness, between our ugliness and your holiness. Thank you
42:41
Speaker 1: for loving us through it all. Thank you Father, Thank
42:51
Speaker 1: you for the beautiful way that you mend and heal,
42:55
Speaker 1: and you bring about release and reconciliation. Thank You for
43:02
Speaker 1: the relief that comes through forgiveness. Broaden our shoulders and
43:09
Speaker 1: deepen our wisdom, and break our wills as we humble
43:15
Speaker 1: ourselves to do what has to be done. And may
43:21
Speaker 1: we do it graciously, and may we do it willingly,
43:27
Speaker 1: as you give the strength that's needed. I trust you,
43:34
Speaker 1: Father to speak personally to each one of us in
43:38
Speaker 1: this very personal message, not just about Paul and Barnabus,
43:45
Speaker 1: but about us. And I trust you Father to do
43:52
Speaker 1: it deeply and permanently, that the wound might heal and
43:58
Speaker 1: that a full life might follow. I ask it through
44:06
Speaker 1: Jesus Christ, our Savior, and all of his people said amen.
44:15
Speaker 2: The preceding message, the Day two Missionaries Duped it Out
44:19
Speaker 2: was copyrighted in two thousand and one, two thousand and three,
44:22
Speaker 2: and twenty twenty four, and the sound recording was copyrighted
44:25
Speaker 2: in twenty twenty four.
44:26
Speaker 1: By Charles R.
44:27
Speaker 2: Swindall Incorporated. All rights are reserved worldwide. Duplication of copyrighted
44:33
Speaker 2: material for commercial use is strictly prohibited