Latest / Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families / #903 What Justin Learnt From 2023

Transcript

#903 What Justin Learnt From 2023 · Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast.
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: It's the podcast for the time poor parent who just
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: once answers.
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  Speaker 1: Now at a right about this time every year, Kylie,
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  Speaker 1: missus Happy Families, and I. By the way, Kylie and
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: Missus Happy Families are the same person. In case you're
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: new to the podcast, Missus Happy Families and I sit
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: down and we review the year that's been. We follow
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: the same format that we follow with all of our meetings.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: What's gone well, what hasn't gone well, and what if
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  Speaker 1: we learn what can we do better moving forward. We
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  Speaker 1: do it each week in our couple's meeting, we do
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: it individually, we do it with our family. We do
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: it every quarter, and at the end of the year
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  Speaker 1: we kind of do a big zoomed out macro view.
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  Speaker 1: We're going to share our insights, our ideas, and our
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: thoughts so hopefully inspire you to improve family living in
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  Speaker 1: your own home. Starting with me today and the next week.
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  Speaker 1: Kylie is going to pull together her list and we'll
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: chat about that sometime early next week. So Kylie, let's
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  Speaker 1: dive into it. For today. I am going to start
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: off with the things that have gone well this year
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: for doctor Justin Coulson, and happy families. There's a handful
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: of things that I think have been really, really great.
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: I'm really excited to know what's on that list, because
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: at the moment, I can just see a lot of hard.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: It's been a kind of a tricky back end of
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  Speaker 1: the year, but there's been a lot of good this
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  Speaker 1: year as well. So the first one I think we
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: have to talk about. We've become lolly and Pops. You're
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: lolly on Pops. We've become grandparents. We are so stoked.
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  Speaker 1: Indiana Sky was born in September to our eldest daughter
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  Speaker 1: and her husband.
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  Speaker 2: And she can't really take that as an achievement on
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  Speaker 2: your end. Oh no, I did nothing.
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  Speaker 1: I think that I did a lot. I raised that
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  Speaker 1: kid and now she's doing a great job and it's
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: so great to watch her living with her husband and
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  Speaker 1: her baby and raising them. And a big thank you
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  Speaker 1: as well to Karen Young from Hay Sigmund because she
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: was the one who inspired the name lolly and Pops.
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  Speaker 1: We really like the oder have being lollipops. I just
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  Speaker 1: really like that. And I guess while we're on the fan,
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: for the most part, our kids are actually hanging in
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: there and doing really well. We've got a daughter who's
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: doing some missionary work over in the UK. We've got
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  Speaker 1: another daughter who's getting ready to go and do exactly that,
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: another one who's done pretty well at school this year. So,
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  Speaker 1: like just the family stuff overall, I'm really pleased about
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  Speaker 1: how that's gone. We've got a great team at work.
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  Speaker 1: That's the second thing that I wanted to highlight. We
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: just have so many great people that work for us. Evelyn, Caroline, Elizabeth,
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: Anna Mim there's you working on the podcast with me,
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: Craig and Jr. We've also got Rachel and Olivia and
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: jet I hope I haven't missed anyone. We've got a
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  Speaker 1: really big team doing a whole lot of stuff we do,
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: and their.
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  Speaker 2: Commitment level just as an employee is amazing. But if
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: you add their belief in you and what happy families
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: is all about, we honestly we couldn't ask for more.
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  Speaker 1: We do great work and we have a great team
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: who really buy into what we're doing because it makes
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  Speaker 1: a difference in people's lives. I just had to chat
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  Speaker 1: the other day. Somebody randomly bumped into me and they
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: just said, I think I recognize you. They obviously knew
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: me from the TV show or something, and they just
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  Speaker 1: said a lot of these really really nice things, and
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  Speaker 1: we do great work and we help people. So that
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: was great. Hey, a couple of other quick things that
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: have gone really well. I've released two books this year,
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  Speaker 1: my brand new book, The Parenting Revolution, which is doing
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: so well and making such an impact in people's lives.
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  Speaker 1: And we also released the second of my dummies books,
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: being a Great Dad for Dummies. So two books plus
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: a TV show, Parental Guidance Season two went out fingers
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: crossed for a season three. We're just waiting on the
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: word on all of that. The podcast's gone really nicely
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  Speaker 1: with five million or thereabouts downloads this year, like four
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: and a half four point six million downloads. That still
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: blaze my mind, so so cool. We've launched new courses
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  Speaker 1: on ADHD and autism this year that have helped so
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: many people in so many great ways. They're the things
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: that have gone really really well. So that's my what
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  Speaker 1: went well part.
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  Speaker 2: Well, You've shared a lot of happy family success. I'm wondering, though,
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: if there's anything personally that you feel has been you.
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  Speaker 1: Know what, It hasn't been the most balanced, brilliant, year. Personally,
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: my exercise regime has fallen off a cliff. I mean,
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: it's just been appalling. I'm not doing anything well listed. Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: I mean, like, I'm serious that the stuff that I've
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  Speaker 1: shared is kind of the stuff that's gone really well.
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  Speaker 1: My systems, my routines, my personal rhythms have been really
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  Speaker 1: out of whack this year. And other than the fact
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  Speaker 1: that we've had lots of conversations about how we're trying
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  Speaker 1: to do well as a family, at an individual level,
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  Speaker 1: there's a lot of room for growth. Maybe I'm being
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: hard on myself, but that's what's going to come up
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: in the next list.
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: Well, now that you've preempted it, I guess what's your
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: list of what didn't go so well this year?
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  Speaker 1: I'm so glad you asked.
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  Speaker 2: Thank you very much.
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  Speaker 1: This is the bit where I get transparent and I
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  Speaker 1: kind of hate what I'm going to share here, but
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  Speaker 1: I want to go through it fairly quickly because the
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  Speaker 1: learnings and where we're going next year is what matters
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  Speaker 1: most out of this conversation. So, first off, because I
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  Speaker 1: travel so much March, and for a range of other reasons,
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: my systems have fallen apart, so physical fitness and health.
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: I used to ride like ten or fifteen thousand k's
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  Speaker 1: every year. This year less than two thousand. It's been
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  Speaker 1: the worst year on my bike ever. I've tried to
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: swim a little bit, but haven't got that going. No
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  Speaker 1: gym worked like physically, not real great. From a spiritual
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: point of view, my devotional practice has been pretty lackluster
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  Speaker 1: as well. It just hasn't been happening. All the stuff
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: that matters to me that I'm supposed to be getting right,
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  Speaker 1: I've prioritized other things above it and haven't gone well.
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  Speaker 1: And now there are reasons for that. For example, my
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: body broke down in September when I broke my back
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: and my neck in a surfing accident. A couple that
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: with a running injury. I was training for a marathon,
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: but I only got three weeks into the training and
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: then my knee completely busted itself, and I've had this
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: shoulder injury. I'm sounding like a really old grumpy cup plan,
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: so I'll stop on that. But there's just been.
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  Speaker 2: All that body breakdown.
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  Speaker 1: I know, it's been terrible. So a couple of things
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: that have just been not quite right. We put a
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: lot of money into developing the ultimate parenting platform online
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: and we failed spectacularly. That has the cost has been
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  Speaker 1: enormous and we have ended up with no result. In fact,
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  Speaker 1: the whole thing has ended up going in the bin,
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: and so absolutely heartbreaking to prioritize spending that way and
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  Speaker 1: have people let us down. We've pulled the pin on
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: those agencies and there's a lot of learnings there, but
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  Speaker 1: that's also been another thing that has not gone well.
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  Speaker 1: It's been a two and a half year journey that's
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: been really really hard to take. And I think probably
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: two other things that I just highlight briefly. Number One,
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: holidays we're having them because we always talk at this
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: time of year about how we need to do our
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: holidays better. They're not going to plan still. So Holiday
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  Speaker 1: one was a cruise. We went on a cruise, which
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: was the first time thing for me. I'd never been
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  Speaker 1: on a cruise before. I didn't love it, But what
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  Speaker 1: I really didn't love even more was that I got
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  Speaker 1: so sea sick that I ended up having needles jabbed
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  Speaker 1: into my cheeks.
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  Speaker 2: I didn't love the extra ten kilos I brought home
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  Speaker 2: with me.
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  Speaker 1: And we spent seventeen days on the ocean and like
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  Speaker 1: three days on land, and really I think it needed
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  Speaker 1: to be around the other way we would have had
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: so I think that we would have more fun if
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  Speaker 1: we'd done seventeen days on land and three days in travel,
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  Speaker 1: whether it's on the ocean or airplanes or whatever. So,
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  Speaker 1: and it was supposed to be a cheap holiday. You
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  Speaker 1: got us this relocation cruise to Hawaii, so it really
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  Speaker 1: really really cheap holiday. What was it six of us
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  Speaker 1: or five of us to cruise for seventeen days? Like
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  Speaker 1: it was super cheap, but then the airfares to come
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  Speaker 1: home cost more than the entire cruise.
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  Speaker 2: Well, when I gave you this spiel, I didn't actually
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  Speaker 2: realize it was a relocation cruise. I thought it was
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  Speaker 2: going around circle.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah no, no, no, so not so cheap and not
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  Speaker 1: so much.
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  Speaker 2: Once I realized that I wasn't letting go of the dream.
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  Speaker 1: That's right. So we did the cruise, probably not going
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  Speaker 1: to do it again in a hurry. Holiday number two,
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  Speaker 1: we were supposed to go to Canns. I normally don't
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: get sick. I got sick, and that meant that you
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: went on a holiday without me. I canceled my flight.
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  Speaker 2: Well, I know you said it didn't go well, but
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  Speaker 2: I had a really.
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  Speaker 1: Quick great and then Holiday number four was canceled. We
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  Speaker 1: have a tradition that at age sixteen, we take each
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: of our daughters on a special holiday, just that child,
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  Speaker 1: you and I, and that trip to Queenstown was canceled
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: due to a family tragedy, which is kind of what
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  Speaker 1: I'm going to end what didn't go well this year
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  Speaker 1: on We've had two deaths in the last couple of months.
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  Speaker 1: My elderly grandmother. We were sad that she died, but
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: also relieved. She was ninety five years old, long slow deterioration,
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: life well lived, and it was a relief mixed with
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: the sadness of farewelling her. But then tragically, in November,
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: suicide took my wonderful nephew, our wonderful nephew, Logan, at
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: age twenty. I wrote about it, We've talked about it
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: a lot on the podcast, and honestly, it changed me forever.
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  Speaker 1: I just it's really kind of put a dampner on
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  Speaker 1: everything that this year has been. It's overshadowed the year
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  Speaker 1: in a really profound and powerful way, and I don't
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: really know how to deal with it. Yet I'm mostly good.
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: Now it's been over a month, I'm mostly good. But
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: everything again, I just had a really bad day or
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: a really bad moment, and I find it terribly hard.
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: Actually found a poem on Facebook. My mum found this
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: poem and she shared it. It's a poem from Donna
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: Ashworth called you Don't just lose someone once, and I
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: thought I'd read it if I can get through it.
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: It says you don't just lose someone once, You lose
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: them over and over, sometimes in the same day. When
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: the lost, momentarily forgotten, creeps up and attacks you from
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: behind fresh waves of grief as the realization hits home,
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: they are gone again. You don't just lose someone once.
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  Speaker 1: You lose them every time you open your eyes to
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: a new dawn, and as you awaken, so does your memory.
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: So does the jolting bolt of lightning that rips into
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  Speaker 1: your heart. They're gone. Losing someone is a journey, not
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: a one off. There is no end to the loss.
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  Speaker 1: There is only a learned skill on how to stay
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: afloat when it washes over. Be kind to those who
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: are sailing this stormy see, they have a journey ahead
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: of them and a daily shock to the system each
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: time they realize they are gone again. You don't just
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: lose someone once, you lose them every day for a lifetime.
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: And I know that's kind of a bit of a downer,
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: But when you look at what's gone well this year
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: and what's not gone well, that's something that has not
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: gone well, and I'm just amazed at how it's impacted
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: me and how I've retained. That's sadness, that sorrow's In
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: the corner of our studio here is a surfboard leaning
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: against the wall. My sister was so kind she gave
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: me Logan's surfboard. I'm the only family member who really surfs,
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: and she gave me his surfboard. And every time the
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: surf's good, I take that outside go surfing with them.
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: Because I'm trying to turn into something good and I've
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: got this Happy Families platform and I'm trying to turn
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: into something good. I'm trying to make a difference in
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: people's lives in memory of a life lost too soon.
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: While those two lists are really important part of our
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: process of reviewing, I think the list that's most important
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: is what we've learned from it and what our plan
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: is to move forward. When you think about especially the
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: last handful of months of this year, it's been really hard,
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: and there's been there's been a lot to kind of
• 11:41
  Speaker 2: work through as a family and individually. But I'm really
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: interested to know what you're learning has been from the
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: hard times and the good times.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, well, I'm going to share a handful of things
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  Speaker 1: really quickly because our time is running out. First off,
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: a happiness lesson and it's actually been through the pain
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: of the life that this has really been drummed home
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: to me. I've shared this a couple of times on
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: the podcast this year, but Jid stood out to me
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: a lot. Where there is gratitude, there is joy. It
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: can also be sadness as well. But without gratitude, there
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: just can't be any joy. And so as I look
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: at you, or the kids, or our home, or the
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: lifestyle that we've tried to develop and create, or the
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: work that I do, or the team that I have,
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: or when I think about even the hard things that
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: we've discussed here, I try to find an opportunity to
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: be grateful. Because when I feel grateful, I feel joy,
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: I feel peace and consolation and goodness. So that's really
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: a big thing. If you're struggling to be happy, find something,
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: find something to be grateful for. It's not about finding
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: a silver lining. It's not about saying I'm going to
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: be optimistic and breathtakingly happy no matter what. That's not
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: what it's about. Rather, it's about looking at that surfboard
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: in the corner and feeling grateful that I have it
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: because I can have the memory of Logan with me
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: all the time. It's finding something to be grateful for,
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: and it actually brings joy, It brings consolation, it brings goodness,
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: whether it's focusing on that sort of stuff or much
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: more positive things. So that's the first thing. Second thing,
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: really quickly and really easily. When you want something done,
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: do it yourself. Do it yourself, yeah, or find someone
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: like how hard is it to find somebody who can
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: genuinely and trustworthily do something now? Obviously, if I'm going
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: to build a house, I'm going to pay someone to
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: do that, right. But in terms of building this digital platform,
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: we've decided to bring it in house. We've made some
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: really really big positive developments and it's going better. So
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: that doesn't always work with everything, but certainly we're finding
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: that's working for us. Third thing, this is something that
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: I've learned that doesn't actually apply to either of the lists,
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: but it's something that's really really working for me at
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: the moment. Our brains lie to us all the time
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: in terms of what's going to make us feel good.
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: Our brains are designed to make us feel good more
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: than they're designed to help us be better, I think,
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: is how I would say it. So our brains make
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: us think that we want the chocolate or the greasy chips,
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: or whatever the unhealthy stuff is.
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: I was looking for the next dopamine here.
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's right. We want it so badly because of that.
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: Our brain wants it, but our body doesn't. And it's
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: the same with our emotions. Our brain loves to release
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: those big emotions like anger and anxiety. It feels so
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: good in the moment. But while our brain is lying
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: to us about feeling better by expressing our anger and anxiety,
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: or eating the food or staying in bed, or presuming
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: whatever selfish outcomes we're chasing, it's not actually working for us.
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: Our body and our relationships, in our psychology, they all
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: need us to listen to them more than we listen
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: to our brain, because our brain is actually deceitful and
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: does not work in our best long term interests. So
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: that's been a really big eyeapna for me. And as
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: I've recognized that, I've become really indifferent to eating junkie
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: food for example, Like I'm still happy enough to have some,
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: I guess, but whenever I eat it, I'm like, yeah,
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: my brain wanted it, but my body didn't. And it's
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: much easier for me to make healthier decisions.
• 14:56
  Speaker 2: Now.
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: That's just an insight and something that I'm looking forward
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: to focusing on more in the new year.
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: Do you have any others?
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: I've got a couple more, but I think I shouldn't
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: even have usd Yeah, I know, I know, but I'm
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: only going to Well, when I say a couple more,
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: I've got about eight more, but I'm only going to
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: share two more. Okay, So losing Logan, I mean this,
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: Like I said, this permeates everything for me at the moment,
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: and it probably will for a long time. Yet, saying
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: goodbye to Logan might have been one of the hardest
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: things I've ever had to do in my life and
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: something that we've talked about on the podcast before. But
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: it's really stuck with me. Whenever somebody said I love
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: you to him, he'd always stop and say love you who?
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: Or what do you mean? Or finish the sentence, or
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: like he would wait until they said love you logan.
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: And our family has adopted that in the way that
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: we speak to each other now. It's changed how we
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: feel about each other. And some other things that we've
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: made the commitment to do. We're going to have a
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: monthly weekend away, even I it's just camping or staying
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: with family or going to a big four caravan park
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: or something like that, just that we can reconnect deeply
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: each month. You've pointed out the importance of that. I
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: hadn't picked up on it, and I'm really excited to
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: to make sure that that happens, reminding each other that
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: we love each other no matter what. Focusing on actually
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: getting our holidays happening next year is a big one
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: for me. There's so many learnings about making holidays work better.
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: But my last I guess learning from the year. A
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: little while ago, maybe two weeks ago, I was catching
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: an aeroplane to go and give a talk somewhere. I
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: think it was going to Melbourne and they were trying
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: to shift my seat. Because I fly so often, they
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: give me four free upgrades a year, four complimentary upgrades
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: to business class, and I wanted to get an upgrade.
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: I always forget to use them. I usually don't use them.
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: I just sit wherever i'm told. I'm pretty relaxed like that,
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: but I decided to go and ask for it because
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: I just was feeling really down. The whole Logan thing
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: was really in my head. And they went to upgrade me,
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: and exactly literally the same moment that they pushed the button,
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: somebody else pushed the button and the other person got
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: the seat, not me, And she was really apologetic. Lady
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: behind the counter was I'm so sorry I got this
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: wrong and it's my fault. And I just said, well,
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: you know what, I'm probably oversharing here, but I lost
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: my nephew, Logan a couple of weeks ago. He took
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: his life, and it's helped me to really take perspective
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: on stuff and what you're describing to me about how
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: somebody else got the seat that I wanted. It's so unimportant.
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: I'm not bothered about it. It would have been nice. I'm
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: not sad. I'm not upset, I'm not cranky. I'm totally
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: fine with whatever. And she kind of looked at me like,
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: first of all, I'm really really sorry, But secondly she
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: was like, we do get kind of worried about the
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: wrong stuff, don't we. And it reminded me of a
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: quote from an author and futurist called Robert Wilson, Robert
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: Anton Wilson, who said, and I quote, you are precisely
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: as big as what you love and precisely as small
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: as what you're allowed to annoy you. And I think
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: for twenty twenty four, my main goal is just to
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: not let small things annoy me, hopefully not even like
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: big things annoy me. I want to be bigger than that.
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: And I think the last couple of months have really
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: cemented that for me. So that's my annual review. They're
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: my insights, They're the things that have stood out to me.
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: Well, I guess I'm going I have to get busy
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: writing a list, aren't I.
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: I can't wait to hear it's well, you've got to share.
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry for you're going over time. I just got well,
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: you know what I'm like. The hack Families podcast, though
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: is produced by Justin Rowlan for Bridge Media. Craig Bruce
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: is our executive producer. I really hope that this has
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: been useful and thanks for letting me share. We'll be
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: back tomorrow with our top books for twenty twenty three.
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: Mine and Kylie's the favorite book that we've read over
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: the last year that we think might inspire you across
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: the sub