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Transcript

Transactional Relationships · Blind But Now I See

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: He's bad.
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: Who we got mister who?
• 0:06
  Speaker 3: Okay, like mister like, never forget that, that isn't forget
• 0:11
  Speaker 3: the mister.
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah, let's get it, Josh, it's been what how many
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: months since we had your like three?
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I was here in May April.
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: Way before May. No, probably March was No, that wasn't
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: me my son's birthday.
• 0:27
  Speaker 4: I in March March mixed up a Yeah.
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: How much followers did your game?
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: Oh? I think I got like two thousand more followers.
• 0:37
  Speaker 4: Yeah, talk your talk and about the book. Now you
• 0:41
  Speaker 4: got the book. Let's second book out became a bestseller
• 0:43
  Speaker 4: on Amazon. Different perspective insights for daily living out right now.
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: And that's what's shout out, you know, in the first
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: book that even better.
• 0:53
  Speaker 4: The first book did Okay, the second book I promoted
• 0:56
  Speaker 4: it more. I know, the one that yeah it came, yeah,
• 1:00
  Speaker 4: became a bestseller. The first one didn't do so well
• 1:02
  Speaker 4: with But look look look at stepping Stone though. Yes,
• 1:05
  Speaker 4: that's you know, I knew what to do.
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: We need to talk to you too about how you
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: me and go to talk to you too about how
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: you published and everything.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: Let's get it. Let's get it.
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so tell us what's going.
• 1:14
  Speaker 4: Over and tell us about the book. What do we expect. Yeah, so,
• 1:18
  Speaker 4: so the second book came from a new place that
• 1:20
  Speaker 4: I'm in, you know, the first time I told my story,
• 1:24
  Speaker 4: but in that in that position or in that place,
• 1:27
  Speaker 4: I was also traveling through a road of like getting
• 1:30
  Speaker 4: my mental right, you know, seeing life from a different perspective,
• 1:35
  Speaker 4: gaining discernment, and also watching the people that I hang around,
• 1:40
  Speaker 4: you know, and realizing my worst. So now nowadays, I'm
• 1:43
  Speaker 4: very careful of my energy, who I tell, who I
• 1:46
  Speaker 4: spend time with, who I talk to on the phone,
• 1:49
  Speaker 4: because I'm on a different perspective. And I will say
• 1:52
  Speaker 4: thank you to you guys, because you pointing me back
• 1:56
  Speaker 4: to my purpose, you know. Yeah, so shout out, appreciate you,
• 2:00
  Speaker 4: shout out to this podcast. And I'm on a different position.
• 2:04
  Speaker 4: And this is why the book has been made. It's
• 2:07
  Speaker 4: a devotional book, a thirty day devotional, but the difference
• 2:11
  Speaker 4: not to God, but it makes you think about yourself.
• 2:15
  Speaker 4: It's a chance to look in the mirror, to ask,
• 2:17
  Speaker 4: and I ask you certain questions. These questions is not
• 2:21
  Speaker 4: just for the people, but it was for me. I
• 2:22
  Speaker 4: had to look at myself in the mirror, and when
• 2:25
  Speaker 4: you look at yourself in the mirror, it's not the
• 2:27
  Speaker 4: most prettiest picture.
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: You have to do some work. I've been doing the work,
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: and so this is why the book was published.
• 2:33
  Speaker 4: Shout out to the book, shout out to you. Definitely, definitely, yeah, yeah, that's.
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: Selling that we got the best seller on the couch.
• 2:40
  Speaker 4: Now listen, man, you know God is good and you
• 2:43
  Speaker 4: know there's more to come, you know in.
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: Any new Pussya Since the last episode.
• 2:48
  Speaker 4: You know, right now, I'm not even thinking about pussy.
• 2:51
  Speaker 4: I'm thinking about money.
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: So we didn't change the more everything money. He was
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: before you was paying any money for the pussy. Now
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: you need the money. Before the this man just.
• 3:06
  Speaker 3: Talked about God devotion his life, but it's he with
• 3:09
  Speaker 3: ben pussy.
• 3:10
  Speaker 4: But bring it back. We got to clear something up
• 3:14
  Speaker 4: to see like, even in the times that I was,
• 3:16
  Speaker 4: you know, doing the things that I shouldn't have been doing,
• 3:19
  Speaker 4: God was always present. I think that that's what people
• 3:22
  Speaker 4: getting messed up at. It's just that I wasn't meeting him.
• 3:26
  Speaker 4: He was always there with me. And on top of that,
• 3:29
  Speaker 4: I also mentioned in the first episode, and I'm mentioning
• 3:32
  Speaker 4: now not everybody's just a shithead. There were people that
• 3:37
  Speaker 4: actually poured into my life and seen the light that
• 3:41
  Speaker 4: I have. I didn't see it last episode.
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: You just well, yeah you have that realization.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you know.
• 3:49
  Speaker 4: And even with the first episode, you know, there was
• 3:52
  Speaker 4: some a lot of relationships that people looked at me
• 3:54
  Speaker 4: funny because they were upset and all of that.
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: But the people that you spoke about on the show,
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: how did that go? What was your response for that? Okay,
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: so how did you start with the Let's start with
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: the first one. Wait, yeah, you got she got kids?
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: How did she feel for I think what? Well, she
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: was her she was ready to blast on me and
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: that she had, you know, a lot of friends.
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: The name started with to Usk or see huh with
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: the sea and start with to see Is this that
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: person you was talking aus note we ain't gonna give
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: no names.
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: But one thing I did say to her. One thing.
• 4:31
  Speaker 4: One thing I did say to her is that you know,
• 4:33
  Speaker 4: this is my story. You know, because people were like, yeah,
• 4:36
  Speaker 4: I'm gonna get on the podcast and.
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell I'm gonna tell my star sector right ahead.
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: You know, do you feel like they was like, I'm
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: gonna come up there.
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, but no, your gods house mother. What
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: was that conversation?
• 4:48
  Speaker 4: Like she was saying like, hey, I wish you would
• 4:51
  Speaker 4: have kind of told me about this before, and I
• 4:54
  Speaker 4: had to mention to her like, listen, I ain't dropped
• 4:56
  Speaker 4: no names.
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: But she was worried that our kids are gonna see it.
• 5:00
  Speaker 4: And that's why everybody was in do you feel you
• 5:02
  Speaker 4: should have left that out?
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: No, my story, and I was sticking to it.
• 5:08
  Speaker 4: It's strictly the story because those people are, you know,
• 5:12
  Speaker 4: have their their perception of what I said. What is
• 5:16
  Speaker 4: not mentioned I'm going to reiterate is that we now
• 5:19
  Speaker 4: have a relationship. She was one of the first people
• 5:22
  Speaker 4: that said, I don't want to do.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: This with you. There's something about you.
• 5:26
  Speaker 4: There's a light inside of you that you deserve friendship,
• 5:29
  Speaker 4: you deserve a family, and I could be there for you.
• 5:32
  Speaker 4: And everybody was laughing, Oh my god, you became the
• 5:35
  Speaker 4: godfather and all of that reason why is because of
• 5:38
  Speaker 4: the light that she's seen in me.
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because they're saying, oh, like, oh, he became the
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: permanent trick. We've seen the comments like that, he's the
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: permanent trick. Now he's everybody has an opinion, you know,
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: and I'm okay with that.
• 5:51
  Speaker 4: What I've learned is that I have to be comfortable
• 5:54
  Speaker 4: with myself. I know what I said, and I was
• 5:56
  Speaker 4: ready for I was ready for the comments. I'm still
• 5:59
  Speaker 4: ready and I love you. Don't think it hurt in
• 6:03
  Speaker 4: your God kid if they do come across that. I
• 6:05
  Speaker 4: think that my god children and I have so much
• 6:09
  Speaker 4: of a relationship that and I'm I've learned that my
• 6:12
  Speaker 4: transparency is my superpower.
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: So and I know how to tell a story.
• 6:17
  Speaker 4: I know how to get you to understand what I'm saying,
• 6:21
  Speaker 4: so I have no problems in sharing the story.
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: My intentions is never to hurt anybody.
• 6:26
  Speaker 4: And but at the same time, I have to make
• 6:28
  Speaker 4: sure that I'm okay within myself.
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: I'm not gonna stress. I'm gonna still sleep very well
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: at night.
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: An I'm saying, how about the last girl, you know,
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: the one that really did it? How did that conversation
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: go with her?
• 6:42
  Speaker 4: It was very tough because she didn't see it coming,
• 6:44
  Speaker 4: nor did I, you know, give her heads up of
• 6:46
  Speaker 4: what was coming. Obviously, you know she wrote in the comments,
• 6:51
  Speaker 4: you know, and all eyes she was she was aggressive, she.
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: Was aggressive, but she's in the she can be aggressive.
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: She can be aggressively.
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: No, it would never, it would never go down.
• 7:06
  Speaker 4: This is disability.
• 7:08
  Speaker 2: Way take your shade.
• 7:11
  Speaker 4: No, inn good good. I know I got you on
• 7:14
  Speaker 4: speed down. But one thing about like I said, she
• 7:20
  Speaker 4: also seen a light in me. So at the same time,
• 7:23
  Speaker 4: she knows how good I've been to her. And I
• 7:26
  Speaker 4: do want to make something clear though. Everything that I've
• 7:30
  Speaker 4: done was in my power. But because I didn't love myself,
• 7:33
  Speaker 4: I made choices. I made decisions that put me in
• 7:37
  Speaker 4: uncompromising positions.
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: Media training, y'all, he's reading the Bible. You read this down.
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: No sounds good.
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: When you got God.
• 7:52
  Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying.
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: You talk that.
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: When you got God and that chat chat with God,
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: chat with.
• 8:02
  Speaker 4: God, got a relationship with him, and you know, amen, I.
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: Feel no man.
• 8:07
  Speaker 4: So you know, she she was upset. We we we
• 8:11
  Speaker 4: settled it, you know, and we cool. Were cool enough
• 8:15
  Speaker 4: where you know, I have my space now, and in
• 8:18
  Speaker 4: my space, I'm able to think clearly. I'm able to
• 8:21
  Speaker 4: pursue my life. My mindset is not so not on this.
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: I gotta chase pussy to feel good. I got I
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: feel good with him myself.
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you are the pussy. Now you are the good
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: You're not the pussy.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: But you know, to be clear, I'm a king man.
• 8:39
  Speaker 4: I've always been a king. That's why I say you
• 8:42
  Speaker 4: always been a king, just stepping into your.
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: Now we have to get into the mess because I've
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: seen her page and it was pictures of y'all up
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: there looking happy.
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: Nigga because he's a liar. Never it wasn't a lie.
• 8:55
  Speaker 4: It was not mentioned I think in the first episode
• 8:59
  Speaker 4: was that there were many good times. But we also
• 9:04
  Speaker 4: have to bring back of what I did. This was
• 9:06
  Speaker 4: all my doing because I didn't love myself. I wanted
• 9:10
  Speaker 4: her there and she was transparent with you. She was transparent,
• 9:13
  Speaker 4: and I wanted also somebody who is not going to
• 9:19
  Speaker 4: really truly give me what I want.
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: But because I was so in need to be loved.
• 9:24
  Speaker 4: And so in need of a touch, and so in
• 9:27
  Speaker 4: need of to wake up to somebody, it was like, yeah,
• 9:31
  Speaker 4: I'll do that, I'll pick this, and I'll move you
• 9:34
  Speaker 4: in and all of that, and she just went by
• 9:37
  Speaker 4: what this is?
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: What allow will you allow her to do it?
• 9:41
  Speaker 4: I got into my feelings and not really looking back up,
• 9:45
  Speaker 4: like hey, she was transparent with who she is and
• 9:48
  Speaker 4: you can't change anybody. So at the end of the day,
• 9:51
  Speaker 4: this is on you. And I will say the the
• 9:54
  Speaker 4: the whatever position it was from, whether it was love,
• 9:58
  Speaker 4: whether it was an agenda, it felt good, but it
• 10:01
  Speaker 4: can become dangerous when you don't love yourself.
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: That's good. So you I like that you took it
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: like you do self reflection and accountability because you had
• 10:11
  Speaker 2: to see where you were the problems as well, because
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: you met her as her being in this service industry.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: Absolutely, and she was.
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: Always honest with you about what she did. She was
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: literally going to do that while she was saying it.
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: She knew she needed somewhere to stay, and you kind
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: of almost took advantage of that because it's like, I know,
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: this girl needs me, you know what I'm saying.
• 10:29
  Speaker 4: So it's like, but also I think that I need
• 10:33
  Speaker 4: something else. And again, like I shared with you guys
• 10:37
  Speaker 4: the first time this has been going on, this is
• 10:40
  Speaker 4: a learned behavior since seventeen. Yeah, so it's like.
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: It's just it's just something that you used, the transactional relationship, right.
• 10:46
  Speaker 4: You know, nothing beyond it, beyond that, and this is
• 10:50
  Speaker 4: what I think I have to do to get that,
• 10:53
  Speaker 4: and it's so amazing that you still can come out
• 10:56
  Speaker 4: of your shell meaning being yourself, being a true authentic
• 11:01
  Speaker 4: self and really be okay with either two things. And
• 11:04
  Speaker 4: they people are going to either accept you or they not.
• 11:08
  Speaker 4: And those who accept you that don't accept you, it's okay.
• 11:11
  Speaker 4: There's nine eight point six billion. However, many people know
• 11:14
  Speaker 4: please everybody you can't. So do you feel like do
• 11:17
  Speaker 4: you feel like the episode helped you? I think it definitely.
• 11:20
  Speaker 4: Like I said, it positioned me back to purpose. It
• 11:23
  Speaker 4: let me know that I have a community because there
• 11:25
  Speaker 4: are people now that are hitting me up like hey,
• 11:28
  Speaker 4: I didn't know you going through that.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: I'm actually going through that.
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: A lot of guys and Will and a lot of
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: guys that are disabled started commenting and they was just
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: like wow. I went to comments responding to them like
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: you know what, You're gonna get help and you also
• 11:41
  Speaker 2: should think about maybe writing a book about that how
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: to get there.
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: Their book is actually in the works right now.
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: Shout out to you or the doctor Susan Josh, keep
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: a book, Adam.
• 11:52
  Speaker 4: Like I said, one thing y'all y'all positioned me to
• 11:54
  Speaker 4: do is keep going about.
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: Put us all in the room.
• 12:00
  Speaker 4: I want the same to shake you up absolutely.
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 12:05
  Speaker 4: I read one of the comments that Frenchy put up,
• 12:08
  Speaker 4: and I remember it was one line that she said,
• 12:10
  Speaker 4: sh had a you know, a paragraph, but she was like,
• 12:11
  Speaker 4: we're all family, saying this is the beauty of this pocket.
• 12:14
  Speaker 4: I've done a few before, but I love being here
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: because I'm with my syst, I with my bro yeah,
• 12:20
  Speaker 4: you know, and you guys are just putting me and
• 12:22
  Speaker 4: reminding me of who I am.
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: And you're a fucking king bro.
• 12:26
  Speaker 4: You got to understand.
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: Literally, you act, you preach, you you know what I'm saying,
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: You advocate, you write books and stuff so much that
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: you do, but sometimes being lustful we take away from that,
• 12:39
  Speaker 2: you know what I'm saying. And that's what I was
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: just talking about with you know, and Wolf before you
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: got here. I'm like, you know, I've been celebate. It'll
• 12:44
  Speaker 2: be two years next month, you under saying.
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: That's a blessing.
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: A few more weeks, yeah, four weeks a month, literally
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: a month in two days and I'll be what have
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: been celibate for two days before younger, I did not
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: think I could go that long without sex because weeks.
• 12:58
  Speaker 2: I learned sex from young two years. A lot of
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: us were hyper sexual. I don't know how old were
• 13:03
  Speaker 2: you when you lost you, Virginia c No, he was eleven.
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: I was twelve, So trust me. And it's different for
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: a boy because it's expected for y'all to go, who
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: fuck off and do this and that a girl takes
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: one dick and she's a selut. So me being who
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: I wasn't just being introduced to sex very early. Yeah,
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: I went my whole life having sex even after I
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: got shot. As soon as I got home from the hospital. Yeah,
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: I got head in the hospital. That's how real. That's
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: how lustful I was. Like, I can't even focus on
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: my healing. And to be honest with you, I swear
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: to it way I swear. If I was not so lustful,
• 13:36
  Speaker 2: I had been walking right now.
• 13:38
  Speaker 4: I think that we also have to mention to their
• 13:40
  Speaker 4: healing as a journey and absolute. For me, my healing
• 13:44
  Speaker 4: is literally that there are times, and I don't know
• 13:47
  Speaker 4: if you guys have ever felt it, where some days
• 13:50
  Speaker 4: is just harder than others. You both got shot, I'm blind.
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: Harder than other days right now talking.
• 14:00
  Speaker 4: About that still and so like though my focus is
• 14:04
  Speaker 4: on the money, like I you know, I have a
• 14:05
  Speaker 4: campaign out right now trying to change the terminology from
• 14:09
  Speaker 4: like handicap accessible to physically friendly. I've been focusing on that,
• 14:13
  Speaker 4: but there are times where, especially now that my crib
• 14:16
  Speaker 4: is empty, no space, nobody to wake up to, you know,
• 14:19
  Speaker 4: and then challenging myself not to make those calls because
• 14:23
  Speaker 4: I can easily go to my phone book and say, hey,
• 14:24
  Speaker 4: I haven't met or like a drug.
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: But that's but that's what I'm saying. I literally I
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: I'm free. My husband is incarcerated, but I'm free. I'm
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: literally making a choice, you know what I'm saying, to
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: do these things. And that's even more disciplined. But you know,
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: you're really disciplined when it no longer feels like you're
• 14:40
  Speaker 2: disciplined in yourself, Like I feel like I'm missing something,
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: you know what I'm saying, Like I feel like it's
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: I feel like as long as I was fucking, this
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: break was well needed. Youn tote what I'm saying. I
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: feel so much clarity from it.
• 14:52
  Speaker 4: I build a connection stronger, look at.
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: The podcast, and we're growing up, you know what I'm saying, Like,
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: even with my kid, I'm way more. You know what
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: I'm saying. I've always been a good mom, but sometimes
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: you get so hurt and distracted, distracted because a lot
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: of women we get distracted and you niggas get pussy
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: get pussy distracted too, so it could take you away.
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: Sometimes the devil will put something in your life that
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: shuns so right and it looks so good that you
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: think that that's what's supposed to be there for you,
• 15:17
  Speaker 2: and it's just there to distract you and pull you
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: away from everything that God's blessings have to offer. Because
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: this is this is an anti right, so distraction. So
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: it's this and in tract, track is to come to come,
• 15:28
  Speaker 2: you know what I'm saying. Together, and so now this
• 15:30
  Speaker 2: track is taking you away from your plane.
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah, in middle school.
• 15:33
  Speaker 4: It's funny you say that because like as a man
• 15:36
  Speaker 4: in summertime, so everything is when you come outside a badass, yo,
• 15:41
  Speaker 4: but follow dresses and all that shit.
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: All that.
• 15:44
  Speaker 4: So now for me though, it's like I'm doing a
• 15:47
  Speaker 4: mental check as I'm looking because I'm outside. And so
• 15:50
  Speaker 4: the old man would have been like, oh let me try,
• 15:52
  Speaker 4: or I'm in the strip club. I can get this
• 15:54
  Speaker 4: number real quick. Now it's like I'm looking at it
• 15:56
  Speaker 4: and it looks very good on the outside.
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: Now my question is, okay, what.
• 16:00
  Speaker 4: Do you call beautiful inside?
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean? What do you come with?
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: Do you come with.
• 16:04
  Speaker 4: Something I read and I got the right one. I
• 16:06
  Speaker 4: don't even want to know what's inside. Like, you never
• 16:10
  Speaker 4: crossed my mind because you got somebody and really and
• 16:13
  Speaker 4: truly in my mind and my word, my wife is
• 16:15
  Speaker 4: the only one that was walking.
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, when you when you when you have a purpose.
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: Wait, but I'm sorry really quick to cut you off.
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: Do you feel like you and your wife have more
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: of a stronger connection because you knew her when you
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: was seeing as well? Absolutely, you feel like it helped.
• 16:31
  Speaker 4: I feel like you know, like I know, I know
• 16:33
  Speaker 4: exactly the type of person she was wait before us.
• 16:36
  Speaker 4: But now it's like I'm seeing a whole different level
• 16:38
  Speaker 4: of her.
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: You can see the inside. Before you were seeing the outside.
• 16:41
  Speaker 4: Now you see it like I've seen the inside before.
• 16:43
  Speaker 4: But now since she became a minister, I really plus,
• 16:45
  Speaker 4: you mature totally different. Yeah, and I'm mature more too.
• 16:48
  Speaker 4: So it's like I see a big difference, a big shift.
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: In my relationship that's a blessing.
• 16:52
  Speaker 4: Before I used to be in a club. I'm chasing it.
• 16:54
  Speaker 4: I'm just like you, chasing it, like how she looks.
• 16:56
  Speaker 4: Got's the first question of accent. Now it's like I'm
• 17:00
  Speaker 4: behind the ball with a whole bunch of ball tenders
• 17:02
  Speaker 4: and I'm not even trying to hit on them. Excuse
• 17:04
  Speaker 4: me because I don't want to brush against you. At
• 17:06
  Speaker 4: a point, I'm like, excuse me, because I don't want
• 17:08
  Speaker 4: to brush on you. I'll wait till you come out
• 17:11
  Speaker 4: for me to go in, like to be honest, because
• 17:13
  Speaker 4: it's like respectful. It's the only person I see in
• 17:15
  Speaker 4: my life right now. So it's like move me no more.
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: When you don't have purpose, you'll always return to your past.
• 17:22
  Speaker 4: So being that you have purpose, it's like you can
• 17:26
  Speaker 4: see anything in front of you, but you just remember, Okay,
• 17:29
  Speaker 4: the goal is this, The goal is my wife.
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: The goal is this podcast. The goal is to, you.
• 17:34
  Speaker 4: Know, to inspire as many people as I can, whether
• 17:37
  Speaker 4: they're disabled or not.
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: So it's a greater reward.
• 17:41
  Speaker 4: On the other side than the girls. Just be a
• 17:44
  Speaker 4: good time, not but not a long time.
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: That's it.
• 17:47
  Speaker 4: My wife gonna wpe My wife gonna wipe them tears
• 17:49
  Speaker 4: when I'm going through.
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: So, Josh, do you believe in like? Do you believe
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: in longevity? Like? Are you looking for longevity with somebody?
• 17:56
  Speaker 4: Absolutely? I think that that's what I want. But I
• 17:58
  Speaker 4: think that as a man before for all of that.
• 18:01
  Speaker 4: Now I'm realizing that, Okay, what am I building?
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: The job?
• 18:05
  Speaker 4: The first job of a man is to be a builder.
• 18:08
  Speaker 4: But if you ain't building shit, then what can a
• 18:11
  Speaker 4: woman come alongside to be a partner with? Because that's
• 18:16
  Speaker 4: what she was created for to be that partner. And
• 18:19
  Speaker 4: if you just in junk, then you're gonna get jump.
• 18:22
  Speaker 4: But when I realized that I'm God's masterpiece, Okay, so
• 18:27
  Speaker 4: now I gotta I gotta do things the right way.
• 18:30
  Speaker 4: I gotta build the right way. I gotta get the
• 18:32
  Speaker 4: right building blocks. I gotta discern who's gonna be my partner.
• 18:36
  Speaker 4: Alignment is now more the biggest thing for me than
• 18:40
  Speaker 4: anything else. Forget the fact that you could cook, that
• 18:43
  Speaker 4: you look good, and all of that. Alignment is on
• 18:45
  Speaker 4: number one. And if we're not aligned, then it's like,
• 18:48
  Speaker 4: all right.
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: Absolutely, have you been celibate?
• 18:52
  Speaker 4: I have since since the time, Yes, I have.
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: I've been.
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: And that's been working for you, glowing and ship. You
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: ain't giving anything hold your energy.
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: I give my energy to God and the people that
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: need me. I'm a servant. I have a servant's heart
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: and that's what I'm here to do. Man.
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: Amen, I'm so proud of you. You can just see
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: a whole proud of you. You definitely way more definitely
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: proud of you, bro, And we love the confidence because
• 19:15
  Speaker 2: these holes.
• 19:16
  Speaker 4: Really nothing did the work you really now, you know what.
• 19:19
  Speaker 4: And at the end of the day, even though even them,
• 19:21
  Speaker 4: you know, the prayers that they'll see the light too,
• 19:23
  Speaker 4: you know, and if they don't, they don't. But my
• 19:26
  Speaker 4: job is to inspire, you know, to to provoke some
• 19:29
  Speaker 4: type of thought. And I'm doing that, I believe by
• 19:32
  Speaker 4: just you know, waking up every day and just trying
• 19:35
  Speaker 4: to see how I can make the world a better
• 19:37
  Speaker 4: place and how we.
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: Can do it together, you know what I'm saying.
• 19:41
  Speaker 4: So that's what's up.
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, notified.
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: So now some of the comments, let's get it, allow
• 19:47
  Speaker 2: you to respond.
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: Let's get it. Let's get it.
• 19:54
  Speaker 4: Hold on one of the comments, somebody said, common Haze
• 19:57
  Speaker 4: is not your therapist, that's a that's a porn star.
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: So that okay, So let me do that name out there.
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: So let me make it. Let me make something very clear.
• 20:08
  Speaker 4: The first time when I was on here, I have
• 20:11
  Speaker 4: to admit y'all have a very big.
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: Platform. So I did jack up the name.
• 20:19
  Speaker 4: Okay, Okay, So we're gonna we're going to put her
• 20:21
  Speaker 4: name out. Her name is Carla Hayward.
• 20:24
  Speaker 2: Carla Hayward. Okay. Now it was just that you was
• 20:28
  Speaker 2: just nervous.
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: I was nervous. I was nervous.
• 20:31
  Speaker 4: Respected this is.
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you Carla Hayward.
• 20:34
  Speaker 4: You know, and anybody who is working with that, you
• 20:37
  Speaker 4: need to be aware and you need to get away
• 20:39
  Speaker 4: from that Carla Hayward. Because somebody said Carla Hayes didn't
• 20:41
  Speaker 4: do nothing, she just got us all. So I'm like,
• 20:43
  Speaker 4: we got to bring down to the phone.
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: Okay, So this is it right here. Okay, let's see.
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: The people want to know how old were you when
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: you lost your virginity?
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: Seventeen?
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, what else did they want to know? Because
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: it was a question that they said, we cut you
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: over into the question. Somebody said you used to stay
• 21:11
  Speaker 2: in the strip club with a cessor Rod Parked.
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: I said, those were definitely.
• 21:15
  Speaker 4: The days, man, those were definite, the days those were
• 21:18
  Speaker 4: There were some days where accessor ride would be really late.
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: Now I got to sit.
• 21:22
  Speaker 4: Outside because the club closed until like five am. I've
• 21:25
  Speaker 4: seen a comment, but I didn't see a comment.
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: But see we read it.
• 21:28
  Speaker 4: Somebody asks, do you regret meeting that pimp that pimp
• 21:32
  Speaker 4: that day? Do I regretting the I don't regret anything
• 21:37
  Speaker 4: that happened in my past basics, because it positioned me
• 21:40
  Speaker 4: into my future of purpose.
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: You know, everything happens for a reason.
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: So somebody that means a dumb question. Laughad did Somebody said, damn,
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: it's so many ust it God, damn, you can't read
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: to that. It's somebody stupid motherfucker's up here.
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: Let's just say.
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: Somebody asks, are we in wheelchairs? No?
• 22:08
  Speaker 4: My car said no, this is my call, this is
• 22:11
  Speaker 4: running through red lights.
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: This is my scooter.
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: I've gotten duys, we're not.
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: Somebody said, what year was it that you started that
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: you go to Virginia? You thirty holding thirty seven, thirty
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: twenty years ago.
• 22:25
  Speaker 4: Oh wow, that wasn't his sick universary.
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: Okay, guys, so he lost his virginity two thousand and
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: six birtha.
• 22:32
  Speaker 4: I want to say springtime. So I don't know what
• 22:34
  Speaker 4: you know exactly. I can't remember all of that, but springtime, springtime.
• 22:39
  Speaker 4: He said birth March Mars. Well, it was definitely after
• 22:43
  Speaker 4: my birthday.
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: It was after BIRTHA. Was your last one birthday?
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: I was a wild guy.
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: Okay, so that's what they wanted. Yeah, it was really
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: just the year. Everybody wanted to know the year.
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it was that. It was the God kids.
• 23:04
  Speaker 4: That was a question.
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they Yeah, the God kids.
• 23:09
  Speaker 4: That became I think a big topic. Gods so out
• 23:12
  Speaker 4: of the ordinary, very people. But that's why I wanted
• 23:15
  Speaker 4: to make very clear that, you know, there are so
• 23:18
  Speaker 4: many First of all, people believe that like men and
• 23:21
  Speaker 4: women can't be friends, you know, or even in this
• 23:25
  Speaker 4: type of situation, you wouldn't think that you can become
• 23:28
  Speaker 4: friends with people.
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: And I go back to God.
• 23:32
  Speaker 4: God really positioned it where people just see it an
• 23:35
  Speaker 4: anointing a light on me where I'm still friends with
• 23:39
  Speaker 4: people that I had a transactional relationship with and now
• 23:44
  Speaker 4: we're the best of friends. We don't do that. I
• 23:47
  Speaker 4: want to make it very clear. We don't do that
• 23:49
  Speaker 4: transactional stuff no more.
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: But we are friends.
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: Okay, Yeah, so they said that. And when I asked
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: him to did she did? Did I say, oh, did
• 24:03
  Speaker 2: you tell her to pretend like this? Like I meant like,
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: did did she pretend like y'all knew each other? You
• 24:07
  Speaker 2: know what I'm saying, like, if you're pretending to When
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: I asked you on the last episode, when I was like, oh,
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: did you all pretend? And such and such and such,
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: I was asking like, I meant like, did you, as
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: I said, did you tell her to pretend? With the
• 24:20
  Speaker 2: relationship thing with When I asked you, I know, I
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: asked about your first time, because that's what they keep
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: saying in your first time When I was like, oh
• 24:28
  Speaker 2: my god, did you ask her to pretend? Remember?
• 24:31
  Speaker 4: I think that it wasn't so much pretend. I think
• 24:34
  Speaker 4: that in that industry, the first thing is to pretend.
• 24:38
  Speaker 4: But I will say I can't speak for her, but
• 24:41
  Speaker 4: I am. I think that she spelt so comfortable that
• 24:44
  Speaker 4: even after the quote unquote session, it was a whole
• 24:47
  Speaker 4: conversation and she felt comfortable to share some things with me.
• 24:52
  Speaker 4: I felt comfortable to share some things with her, And
• 24:55
  Speaker 4: I think that's what was the beginning.
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: Of a friendship. Okay, despite that, you know, transactional ship.
• 25:02
  Speaker 2: Somebody said, at first I thought this was Chico Bean
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: and this was I want to then floor, but this
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: follow up, yeah, they thought it was. Somebody say even
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: AI couldn't come up with this. Then somebody saw me
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: he got what he paid for. And then somebody say, oh,
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: they want to know of you and a pimp still friends.
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: No, I haven't seen that man in years.
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: You don't know where he at. I don't know.
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: I don't even be in that neighbor.
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: But how did y'all end off? Like what was your
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: last conversation?
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: Like I can't even remember.
• 25:32
  Speaker 4: I think that you know the time after that was
• 25:34
  Speaker 4: like you glod bro, I wasn't you know?
• 25:37
  Speaker 3: I was?
• 25:40
  Speaker 4: I was, he saying he went from DMX, you need that,
• 25:45
  Speaker 4: you need something after I got you because it was
• 25:49
  Speaker 4: a money thing at the end of the day, you know.
• 25:51
  Speaker 4: So I understood, or at least I understand now where
• 25:54
  Speaker 4: I've seen a question. I asked, what the hell you
• 25:55
  Speaker 4: were doing on that corner? If when you don't know yourself,
• 25:59
  Speaker 4: you'll put yourself anywhere. And being that I didn't really
• 26:03
  Speaker 4: receive the love that I needed when I was younger,
• 26:07
  Speaker 4: you were in searching. I've been searching for it and
• 26:10
  Speaker 4: the hood. That hood particularly showed me so much love,
• 26:15
  Speaker 4: even in spite of the transactional stuff. People would literally
• 26:18
  Speaker 4: look out for me. And that was the part of
• 26:21
  Speaker 4: my life where I actually felt loved. Sitting outside people
• 26:24
  Speaker 4: know who I am sometimes, you know, after they're getting
• 26:28
  Speaker 4: to know me either and inviting me in their homes
• 26:30
  Speaker 4: for a male to eat, you know, sitting at a
• 26:32
  Speaker 4: dinner table something that I wasn't used to. So you know,
• 26:35
  Speaker 4: everything works out for the good, So it's a safe
• 26:38
  Speaker 4: to save. Was it love or the attention that you
• 26:40
  Speaker 4: was getting? What you could you repeat that? Was it
• 26:43
  Speaker 4: love or the attention you was getting from other people?
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: I think I wanted both. I wanted the attention.
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: But I'm sorry to cut you off with it said,
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: that's what we do. But that's what we do on
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: this show.
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: Is we family like we have?
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: The question is do you think maybe that you didn't
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: know the difference between love and attention because you didn't
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: have that at home.
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: Absolutely, so maybe both.
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: Seemed like one seemed like the other and the other.
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: Seemed like Absolutely, you get confused use.
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: Attention with love, like even understanding even like famous people,
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: they confuse attention with love. Actually that's not necessarily love.
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: You're just getting a lot of attention because people want
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: to be in your life.
• 27:16
  Speaker 4: And if I could be like really transparent with the
• 27:19
  Speaker 4: transactional relationships that I've had most of the time, the
• 27:23
  Speaker 4: majority of it, I wanted the affection, so I would say, hey,
• 27:28
  Speaker 4: I'll pay for the sex, but I want the hugs.
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: I want the kisses.
• 27:32
  Speaker 4: And I'm not thinking about where you've been who even sucking,
• 27:36
  Speaker 4: who you've been fucking, not thinking about all of that.
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: I just want this love.
• 27:40
  Speaker 4: I want that, And I'm not totally understanding totally. It
• 27:44
  Speaker 4: is very understandable, definitely, is.
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: It so y'all all kiss prostitutes.
• 27:48
  Speaker 4: Not understand.
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: It's like what he really desired. But well, let's get
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: into you. Because you went on you said to the people,
• 27:58
  Speaker 2: I don't care who he was sucking.
• 28:04
  Speaker 5: Make it clear that I understand that, like underlying what
• 28:08
  Speaker 5: you what you're craving is something that you deserve as
• 28:11
  Speaker 5: a human being, you know, And because it was at
• 28:14
  Speaker 5: the moment you wasn't getting it in the more desirable way,
• 28:17
  Speaker 5: it was like I can get it through this channel,
• 28:19
  Speaker 5: and like It's really like sex is one thing, but
• 28:23
  Speaker 5: you really you crave warmth, you know what I mean.
• 28:25
  Speaker 4: You crave love. You create something that.
• 28:26
  Speaker 5: We all we need, Like baby can't even develop without
• 28:29
  Speaker 5: this skin touching to you know skin. So this is
• 28:32
  Speaker 5: what you desire, and you're a man, you deserve that
• 28:35
  Speaker 5: right absolutely.
• 28:36
  Speaker 4: And I think if I can add to that versus
• 28:39
  Speaker 4: the old Josh and now the becoming Josh, was the
• 28:43
  Speaker 4: similarity between the two is that I'm willing to do
• 28:46
  Speaker 4: whatever it takes to get to where I want to
• 28:49
  Speaker 4: get to.
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: So in the past, it was money.
• 28:52
  Speaker 4: In the past, it was and I think somebody was
• 28:55
  Speaker 4: even probably asking how much was you paying? There were
• 28:57
  Speaker 4: some people I was paying two hundred. There were some
• 29:00
  Speaker 4: people actioning for a thousand.
• 29:01
  Speaker 2: Dollars you paid, You had a thousand dollar night.
• 29:04
  Speaker 1: I've had those nights.
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: I've had some big porn star type bitches. Some of
• 29:09
  Speaker 2: them were some of them bad bitches, some of them
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: were it. Some of them they stay with you two
• 29:17
  Speaker 2: out of ten for a thousand.
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: When you don't love yourself, you're gonna set up for anything.
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: So what having your legs get the shake in and
• 29:23
  Speaker 2: you're like, oh no, it's.
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: To be clear, No, no, no, many nights I had the
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: lady shaking like.
• 29:28
  Speaker 2: I'm not talking about.
• 29:31
  Speaker 4: Hitch, Like, yeah.
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: I got that.
• 29:37
  Speaker 4: It was a drug. It was a drug, and it's
• 29:39
  Speaker 4: like I needed it now and I had nothing else
• 29:42
  Speaker 4: to focus on.
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: So that was my piece. But but then you realize.
• 29:46
  Speaker 4: As you you know, get wise of that, that's not peace,
• 29:49
  Speaker 4: that's chaos.
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: That sex is addicting naturally is the way that ship feels.
• 29:55
  Speaker 2: Even the virginity people I say, I hear like a
• 29:57
  Speaker 2: lot of guys say like they always you always try
• 30:00
  Speaker 2: to go back for that first night, like that feeling
• 30:01
  Speaker 2: that you got when you first came.
• 30:03
  Speaker 4: You're never gonna get that.
• 30:03
  Speaker 2: You're never gonna get it back.
• 30:05
  Speaker 4: I think though, like if we can even take the
• 30:07
  Speaker 4: conversation deeper, it's more so even about like when you're
• 30:11
  Speaker 4: doing it multiple times and you're doing it with the
• 30:14
  Speaker 4: wrong people.
• 30:14
  Speaker 6: You start to lose the But it's it's definitely a
• 30:17
  Speaker 6: So it's so tar you're connecting with with with with
• 30:21
  Speaker 6: their energy versus your energy, and if your energy is
• 30:24
  Speaker 6: not strong, plus their energy is not strong.
• 30:26
  Speaker 4: But they just some hustlers. They just want your money.
• 30:27
  Speaker 4: They'll tell you what you wanta in, but they got
• 30:30
  Speaker 4: their own shit that they going with. And so now
• 30:32
  Speaker 4: even after the session, why am I feeling so depressed?
• 30:34
  Speaker 2: Because that's because it's called the spiritually transmitted demons. They
• 30:38
  Speaker 2: see these sexually transmitted diseases, but they also have spiritually
• 30:41
  Speaker 2: transmitted demons. So now, like you said, if you're not
• 30:44
  Speaker 2: prayed up enough, if you're not you know what I'm saying, enough,
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: and you could be all those things. But sometimes God
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: will let you learn when you lay down with the
• 30:50
  Speaker 2: wrong person. And that's why they're saying, you are as
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: good as who you lay down with. So now here
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: we go, I feel like men going. We be sitting
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: here judging, we judge women. We judge women for fucking
• 30:59
  Speaker 2: this nigga, that nigga, but then you laying down with
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: the nigga that's fucking this bitch, that bitch. So you're
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: still just as bad as that. You know what I'm saying,
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: because it's being a bunch of people.
• 31:09
  Speaker 4: With my wife is like I don't want no other woman.
• 31:11
  Speaker 4: It's like before I'm sleeping, sleep and sleeping because it's
• 31:15
  Speaker 4: like I don't know what it is. It's like something
• 31:16
  Speaker 4: I'm trying to feel avoid I'm trying to feel. It's
• 31:20
  Speaker 4: so funny that you'all talking about here somebody breathing and
• 31:24
  Speaker 4: you hear that heart through their body closed. That's a
• 31:29
  Speaker 4: different type.
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: Of it's a connection, you know, it's it's a magical thing.
• 31:32
  Speaker 4: I can hold you after I finish and listen to
• 31:35
  Speaker 4: you breathe and different ship.
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: What was the closest thing you felt to a relationship.
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: I think it was my last experience with.
• 31:44
  Speaker 2: The situation you spoke about. Yeah, it's the closest.
• 31:47
  Speaker 4: I think he's the closest thing the last podcast, you know.
• 31:50
  Speaker 4: And and the beautiful thing is that, you know, even
• 31:54
  Speaker 4: despite like I wanted it to go a certain way,
• 31:58
  Speaker 4: but then realizing that it just can't, but still being
• 32:02
  Speaker 4: you know, right within my own self to still love
• 32:06
  Speaker 4: love from a certain distance, but you know, still be cool.
• 32:10
  Speaker 4: But like no boundaries. I had no boundaries in the beginning.
• 32:14
  Speaker 4: Now I have boundaries. And it's not just for any
• 32:16
  Speaker 4: one particular individual, it's for everybody, you know, Like I
• 32:19
  Speaker 4: said in the first time, that's something I just can't
• 32:22
  Speaker 4: and won't do again. As far as inviting someone into
• 32:27
  Speaker 4: my space, my space is my sanctuary.
• 32:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I believe you because you just even it's
• 32:32
  Speaker 2: a certain look you have about you. You even look
• 32:34
  Speaker 2: like you've been working out and shit, you know, you
• 32:37
  Speaker 2: look healthy and you look like you're just better space
• 32:40
  Speaker 2: and you're taking care of yourself and you're realizing that
• 32:42
  Speaker 2: you don't need anybody.
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: But God, I got a legacy to live.
• 32:46
  Speaker 2: Amen. And and that was another thing, speaking to fucking legacies. Motherfucker,
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: your baby not gonna get cerebral poalsy. It's not hereditary.
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: So I went on, so, okay, I read that comment.
• 32:58
  Speaker 2: No it isn't there.
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: I read the comment.
• 33:01
  Speaker 4: So that day I didn't comment or nothing like that,
• 33:04
  Speaker 4: but I went to Google myself and I seen it
• 33:07
  Speaker 4: and I posted it in my stories because I seen
• 33:10
  Speaker 4: the comments going back and forth, and I stand corrected.
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: Of what I said. There is a four percent.
• 33:19
  Speaker 2: Chance, So there is a chance.
• 33:20
  Speaker 4: They're four percent even though it's a birth defect, even
• 33:24
  Speaker 4: though it's the thing, it's only four percent nine times
• 33:27
  Speaker 4: or whatever the mathematics you want to use.
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: It's only four percent.
• 33:31
  Speaker 4: So most of the time you're not going to have
• 33:33
  Speaker 4: a child that's going to have spine up for them.
• 33:35
  Speaker 2: It's just like with the sickle cell trade is if
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: you have one person that carries it, the next person
• 33:39
  Speaker 2: that doesn't type blah blah blah.
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: Right, so I was nervous about that.
• 33:44
  Speaker 2: Let's look it up because I don't want them trying
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: to fact check me again. I don't like one thing.
• 33:47
  Speaker 2: I don't like seeing fact checking with my Motherfucking shit,
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: what the fuck these hole story? Let's go back. Can
• 33:52
  Speaker 2: your child get Let's see what you google Carmen Hagges
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: fucking Piston clean or cerebro.
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: I'm glad you I had final.
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: Oh I'm citious. That's why I'm like CP. Can your
• 34:10
  Speaker 2: child get final.
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: Spin s P s P I n A the Yeah.
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: Then I just say, don't like being corrected the marsha
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: if you know it is you not speak your ship
• 34:24
  Speaker 2: Chickens always started with always, So there was this pimp
• 34:27
  Speaker 2: after that last crazy it went so love you? How
• 34:30
  Speaker 2: many people remixed our ship.
• 34:32
  Speaker 4: Yo on TikTok Oh my god, I've seen the remixes you.
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: But I mean, I'm laughing.
• 34:38
  Speaker 4: I'm glad you love it. I mean you heal from.
• 34:40
  Speaker 2: Your trump oh ship, but you're still wrong. Yes, your
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: child can inherit spina bit for that if you have
• 34:46
  Speaker 2: spin for that your child's risks of having a child
• 34:48
  Speaker 2: with the condition is about three percent, about one three
• 34:53
  Speaker 2: percent to five percent. So okay, all right, to be clear,
• 34:56
  Speaker 2: all right, correctly, correctly, but yeah, so it says while
• 35:01
  Speaker 2: the exact cause is a combination of genetic and environmental factors,
• 35:04
  Speaker 2: this risk can be significantly lowered by taking daily folic
• 35:09
  Speaker 2: acid supplements well before becoming pregnant. So it's just about
• 35:12
  Speaker 2: taking your That's what it was with me. Your prenatal
• 35:15
  Speaker 2: is your mom didn't take her prenatal exactly.
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: He did it as far as I know. That's the reason.
• 35:19
  Speaker 2: And it was way long ago because you're very old.
• 35:22
  Speaker 7: Right, so people didn't know too much about you, right,
• 35:27
  Speaker 7: But people didn't know too much about that, I believe
• 35:29
  Speaker 7: in the eighties, you know, even with having done eighty
• 35:33
  Speaker 7: nine was the last you know, right before the nineties.
• 35:37
  Speaker 4: But that's that's what it was, you know, people not
• 35:40
  Speaker 4: knowing even with I have a VP shunt. That's a
• 35:44
  Speaker 4: tube from the brain all the way down to it's
• 35:47
  Speaker 4: at the my heart, but it used to be in
• 35:50
  Speaker 4: mus stomach.
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: So what is that to do?
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: It drains fluid water from the brain.
• 35:55
  Speaker 2: Okay, so but why does it go.
• 35:58
  Speaker 4: So they had to put six feet started in the
• 36:01
  Speaker 4: abdomen of my stomach to drain out that fluid because
• 36:04
  Speaker 4: usually people with hydro cephalis, that's the other thing that
• 36:07
  Speaker 4: I have.
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: You have hydrocephalus as well, So that's separate from the
• 36:10
  Speaker 2: spina bifida. Yes, okay, so what is that?
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: So that's what it is to the brain.
• 36:14
  Speaker 4: Usually if you don't well, when you don't correct that,
• 36:17
  Speaker 4: the head can literally turn into like a balloon in
• 36:20
  Speaker 4: it and just eventually it pops down and the baby dies.
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: Yes, but as an adult and then yeah, the baby
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: can I've seen question.
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: Because I had Do you remember Kimberly with spina bit
• 36:31
  Speaker 2: Kim and she passed away because of the shunt, right,
• 36:34
  Speaker 2: I don't know why or something like that.
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: I don't know why she passed.
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: You remember him?
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we went to camp together. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: was the home.
• 36:43
  Speaker 2: But yeah, that was that's that's when I learned about
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: spin in the shunts and how it could affect you guys. Yes,
• 36:49
  Speaker 2: that was a sad day because it was like, god.
• 36:52
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's it's inside. So if you look right, if
• 36:55
  Speaker 4: I've been.
• 36:57
  Speaker 3: To the camera, the camera get in on there, let's
• 37:03
  Speaker 3: you know people, you know, people are like you can
• 37:07
  Speaker 3: see you can see I feel it.
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: Right, yeah, you can see you can see it? Yeah,
• 37:20
  Speaker 1: in your skin? Right?
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: So where does it go to? Like what is it?
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: Dream? Right now it's at the chambers of my heart,
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: but it used to be at my stomach.
• 37:30
  Speaker 4: How do like waste? Like?
• 37:31
  Speaker 2: How does it work? What does the waist go?
• 37:34
  Speaker 4: So I guess the baby again, I'm not you can
• 37:37
  Speaker 4: fact check.
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: I don't know it.
• 37:38
  Speaker 2: You don't got no baby.
• 37:41
  Speaker 1: So you got to put.
• 37:42
  Speaker 4: It into the baby's stomach and eventually just goes up
• 37:45
  Speaker 4: to I guess part of the brain.
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: That cathe that drains that fluid.
• 37:49
  Speaker 2: But you've had this since your baby, since I was
• 37:51
  Speaker 2: a baby. But where does it drain the fluid.
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: To fluid goes into your blood stream?
• 37:55
  Speaker 2: But is that good for you?
• 37:56
  Speaker 4: I say that's not toxic because it's all the blood.
• 37:59
  Speaker 4: The blood, The blood cleans itself.
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's the liver cleans.
• 38:05
  Speaker 4: The blood cleans too. The heart pushes like filter the
• 38:08
  Speaker 4: blood and push it out to the body. I was
• 38:09
  Speaker 4: the em t baby, okayd em.
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: They don't let the brother got.
• 38:15
  Speaker 2: An empty school. Okay, So the blood is the pure
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: of a natural purifier. Okay, so you so it just
• 38:24
  Speaker 2: goes there. So why did why was it? And you said,
• 38:26
  Speaker 2: the only reason it is back to your heart now
• 38:28
  Speaker 2: is because you grew so when you were a baby
• 38:30
  Speaker 2: it was actual summing because.
• 38:31
  Speaker 4: There was a there was a surgery that I had.
• 38:33
  Speaker 4: I have ballotstruction at sixteen.
• 38:35
  Speaker 2: Oh my god, that change it that that was a
• 38:38
  Speaker 2: crazy what caused that I had a ut? I and
• 38:41
  Speaker 2: it caused constipation that I know.
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: I was taking the bactrum and we learned that bactrum
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: wasn't for me.
• 38:47
  Speaker 4: And I was in the hospital throwing up three to
• 38:51
  Speaker 4: four leaders of bio.
• 38:54
  Speaker 2: So they that you know what's crazy. When I get
• 38:57
  Speaker 2: my ut I don't take backtroom. It does not work
• 38:59
  Speaker 2: from me. I feel like I could feel my kidneys
• 39:01
  Speaker 2: from taking back to That's what it feels like because
• 39:05
  Speaker 2: it's supplements. That's the other name from it, supplem X
• 39:07
  Speaker 2: or whatever, right right action. What happened your stomach?
• 39:09
  Speaker 5: Care?
• 39:10
  Speaker 2: You hungover? God? Its thinking about it and no, yeah,
• 39:14
  Speaker 2: we had to take this is this is the wheelchair
• 39:16
  Speaker 2: because even though we don't have the same disability, things
• 39:19
  Speaker 2: we have in common because that we're both willing. You know,
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: this can't relate. He can't sit with us.
• 39:24
  Speaker 4: But baby, I could walk. I can walk the conversation.
• 39:31
  Speaker 4: What are you're talking about? The talk about?
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: Look at me, look at me, Josh, this conversation today,
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: I know what's exactly going on. And no, but all
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: jokes to the side, though. So when they did that
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: surgery right with the bowel extruption, how did it affect your.
• 39:50
  Speaker 4: So now they have to reposition the tube, They have
• 39:53
  Speaker 4: to move it out. They have to take literally the
• 39:55
  Speaker 4: tube out so that the stomach can heal.
• 39:57
  Speaker 2: So wait, I got another question. With bowel obstruction, isn't
• 40:00
  Speaker 2: that meaning the bow is in your body? That brainy,
• 40:03
  Speaker 2: it was going to put the ship into your blood.
• 40:05
  Speaker 2: The ship was going to go into your blood.
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: So they have to do so I'm throwing it up.
• 40:09
  Speaker 4: So now they have to put another thing down my
• 40:11
  Speaker 4: nose and down it comes down my throat to actually suckesophagus. Yeah,
• 40:15
  Speaker 4: to suck all that stuff up.
• 40:18
  Speaker 2: That's that's about looking pain you No bio bio you're
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: throwing that bio bio is the yellow stuff you know,
• 40:28
  Speaker 2: you know when you hungover, and I know, I know
• 40:31
  Speaker 2: I had to make sure that not bow, not bow.
• 40:35
  Speaker 4: You start talking, just start hurting it.
• 40:38
  Speaker 2: We're talking about bio. So bio, guys, is a yellow
• 40:41
  Speaker 2: fluid when you have no more food or anything in
• 40:43
  Speaker 2: your body.
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: I know it comes up.
• 40:44
  Speaker 2: Can we change can we change acid? And he wasn't.
• 40:50
  Speaker 4: I said was certified.
• 40:51
  Speaker 2: No I'm not talking about that. I said he wasn't.
• 40:53
  Speaker 2: He wasn't gonna be to do it. You see it
• 40:54
  Speaker 2: passing out the conversation. You can't even what it's over.
• 40:59
  Speaker 4: So I've seen some ship in emt I really was
• 41:07
  Speaker 4: on the truck. I've seen some ship. Yeah, I really
• 41:10
  Speaker 4: did it.
• 41:11
  Speaker 2: Did you say your truck picked you up that night?
• 41:13
  Speaker 4: Not my truck, but that would have been a good
• 41:17
  Speaker 4: ass stuff.
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: But not my truck.
• 41:20
  Speaker 4: But I've really worked on people. Real life works on people.
• 41:24
  Speaker 4: It's different from hearing it and actually working on them.
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: Like I haven't ever had a G s W N.
• 41:29
  Speaker 4: That's why I had. Somebody had a pipe against their face,
• 41:32
  Speaker 4: like a pipe in their face.
• 41:34
  Speaker 2: Ah, are you sitting a cringing at this, nigga? That's easier.
• 41:38
  Speaker 4: It's like when you don't know when you don't know them,
• 41:40
  Speaker 4: it don't bother you. Just let me do the work.
• 41:42
  Speaker 4: It just hurt when it's like kids and older people
• 41:45
  Speaker 4: because you relate to like this could be my grandparents
• 41:48
  Speaker 4: and shit like that.
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: So back to the catheter in your nest, so you
• 41:52
  Speaker 2: have to.
• 41:52
  Speaker 4: Keep that forever basically, and the shut can malfunction at times.
• 41:58
  Speaker 2: So what happens with a malfunction.
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: The mouth function?
• 42:00
  Speaker 4: It could be anywhere. Well, for me it was seizures.
• 42:03
  Speaker 4: I would have a lot of seizures. You can have
• 42:05
  Speaker 4: blue lips, other things that I don't want to be
• 42:10
  Speaker 4: state because I want to be factual and correct and
• 42:12
  Speaker 4: all of that.
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: But for me, it was seizures.
• 42:15
  Speaker 4: There are people that have let's look at that VP
• 42:17
  Speaker 4: shunts that have had several what they call revisions. That
• 42:22
  Speaker 4: means placing the tube in a place where it's not
• 42:26
  Speaker 4: going to affect the body. So all throughout my life
• 42:30
  Speaker 4: the tube is placed at birth. I've been blessed to
• 42:33
  Speaker 4: only have three revisions. The reason why I say three
• 42:37
  Speaker 4: is because I feel like my doctor fucked me up
• 42:39
  Speaker 4: the last two, or the doctor that I had. So
• 42:42
  Speaker 4: while I was having the seizures, we're about to do
• 42:45
  Speaker 4: the surgery, and after we do the surgery, he says,
• 42:49
  Speaker 4: I think the next time that you have that we
• 42:51
  Speaker 4: do with revision. We're going to put it around the
• 42:54
  Speaker 4: chambers of the heart. I get out of the hospital,
• 42:57
  Speaker 4: go back home. The next night I had a seizure,
• 43:01
  Speaker 4: which means the tube wasn't doing.
• 43:02
  Speaker 2: But what was it?
• 43:03
  Speaker 4: What it's supposed to be?
• 43:04
  Speaker 2: Put in the tube by your heart.
• 43:06
  Speaker 4: That's why i'm so because that's that's the only place
• 43:08
  Speaker 4: that and it's around the chambers of the heart, so
• 43:12
  Speaker 4: that's the best about I guess they feel where it's
• 43:16
  Speaker 4: not going to affect anywhere else in the body, because
• 43:19
  Speaker 4: there's basically two places you could put it, either in
• 43:22
  Speaker 4: the stomach and the abdomen somewhere or by the heart.
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: They can't put it nowhere else.
• 43:26
  Speaker 2: They didn't want to put it in your stomach. I
• 43:27
  Speaker 2: guess if it's going to because it's like once you're
• 43:30
  Speaker 2: doing it is done.
• 43:31
  Speaker 4: Right, and it's not you're going to have more malfunctions.
• 43:34
  Speaker 4: So it's best to put it by the chamber of herd.
• 43:35
  Speaker 2: No question, God forbid. If that one malfunctions, where do
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: they put it after that?
• 43:41
  Speaker 1: That's a good question. That's an answer. I don't know.
• 43:43
  Speaker 4: I haven't had a revision since I was seventy seventeen.
• 43:47
  Speaker 4: Oh also, I mean you.
• 43:47
  Speaker 2: Go three with by the time you were seventeen, because
• 43:52
  Speaker 2: it's probably grown up stages.
• 43:53
  Speaker 4: And yeah, but I've known people who've had like ten twelve,
• 43:59
  Speaker 4: you know. So I've had the doctors to do the
• 44:01
  Speaker 4: right work, and so to this day, you know, knock
• 44:03
  Speaker 4: on wood, I haven't had any type of surgery.
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: Uh, neurologically, that's a blessing.
• 44:08
  Speaker 2: So what about your No, not your head, nigga, see
• 44:16
  Speaker 2: your face. Damn. I had the fucking question. I have
• 44:21
  Speaker 2: the fucking question.
• 44:21
  Speaker 4: I don't I don't hurt none of the adult right,
• 44:23
  Speaker 4: do it hurt?
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: No? The two.
• 44:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you can't feel it. No, it don't feel like
• 44:28
  Speaker 2: nothing in your neck. No?
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: When when?
• 44:30
  Speaker 4: When that when it starts hurting, Usually it's gonna be
• 44:32
  Speaker 4: from your head. You're going to have like these seizure
• 44:35
  Speaker 4: like symptoms. It's gonna feel like somebody's stepping on your head.
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: What damn? Yeah.
• 44:39
  Speaker 2: So that was my next question, was the last time
• 44:40
  Speaker 2: you had a seizure that.
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: Was around my teenage, around the time, So.
• 44:44
  Speaker 2: You haven't had one in twenty years. Yep, that's a
• 44:46
  Speaker 2: blessing in your head because like a lot.
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: Of people don't have an enlarged head.
• 44:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, a lot of people with the thing. You just
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: have a natural head. That's your natural head.
• 44:56
  Speaker 1: Because when I was a baby, though, I had to
• 44:57
  Speaker 1: like grow into my neck like because you had like
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: a little right because the head was like.
• 45:02
  Speaker 4: Covering the whole neck, you know what I'm saying, growing.
• 45:06
  Speaker 2: And with spinal bit for the Did you ever try
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: physical therapy to try to like stand up and walk?
• 45:11
  Speaker 4: I have as a child, I had someone come into
• 45:14
  Speaker 4: my house. I regret that. You know, my family didn't
• 45:18
  Speaker 4: work on walking with me when the therapists would come
• 45:22
  Speaker 4: because Medicaid is paying for that, so you're only getting
• 45:24
  Speaker 4: it once a week. So it's cool to stand up,
• 45:27
  Speaker 4: take the few steps. But now after you don't do it,
• 45:31
  Speaker 4: you lose progress.
• 45:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the muscle atrophy and everything like that comes.
• 45:35
  Speaker 4: And so I feel like if I would have kept
• 45:38
  Speaker 4: at it with the braces, where we started would be
• 45:41
  Speaker 4: from the ankle all the way to the waist. What
• 45:44
  Speaker 4: I heard was if I kept on doing it, the
• 45:46
  Speaker 4: braces the smallest, yeah, smallest.
• 45:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah. That was the same thing with me. I had
• 45:50
  Speaker 2: the same one I had the CAFOs that came all
• 45:52
  Speaker 2: the way up, yeah, and then they started to go down.
• 45:55
  Speaker 1: Right right, you know. But I you know, on the
• 45:58
  Speaker 1: other side of purpose, I say.
• 45:59
  Speaker 2: That cafe CAFOs are the the leg braces. You don't
• 46:06
  Speaker 2: need what we need, nigga. The only thing I'm gonna say,
• 46:08
  Speaker 2: I'm your time, thinking you good, we gotta get.
• 46:11
  Speaker 4: Dr have your time, y'all. And hell but no about
• 46:18
  Speaker 4: them next world. Let no, no, we ain't talking about
• 46:22
  Speaker 4: the mix right.
• 46:22
  Speaker 2: Now, not for real though, Like I I had those
• 46:26
  Speaker 2: two so I definitely get it. But you so you
• 46:29
  Speaker 2: feel like you could have been further with your progress
• 46:32
  Speaker 2: if have you ever thought about going back to therapy
• 46:35
  Speaker 2: to get better and do stuff?
• 46:37
  Speaker 1: Not at this time, I'm so big and focused on
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: my LLC.
• 46:42
  Speaker 4: What what's your ll C? My books? In this campaign
• 46:46
  Speaker 4: that I'm doing it, just do it.
• 46:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a fact. That's just that you.
• 46:50
  Speaker 2: Don't want to put things out there.
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, I've been doing it. I'm
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: gonna send you out a link.
• 46:55
  Speaker 2: Well, no, just just send it to us. And we
• 46:57
  Speaker 2: promoted and.
• 46:58
  Speaker 4: Talking about I went to school, right, somebody had her
• 47:01
  Speaker 4: brace the girl and then she had a brace around
• 47:03
  Speaker 4: like her waists and then there was like going up
• 47:06
  Speaker 4: to your back.
• 47:07
  Speaker 2: Oh no, that's the diffract. That's the that's the back
• 47:09
  Speaker 2: brads one for like people with just like scolios and
• 47:13
  Speaker 2: stuff like that.
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: Because you had to walk.
• 47:15
  Speaker 2: We had the ones from the waist. It's the waist
• 47:17
  Speaker 2: down right, Okay, so like it goes up to your back,
• 47:20
  Speaker 2: but it really is only helping you sturdy up your
• 47:22
  Speaker 2: waistpe ship okay, okay, Yeah, I wanted to love you
• 47:25
  Speaker 2: and sign some but no, Josh, we are just so
• 47:28
  Speaker 2: grateful that you came to do this episode with us today.
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: I went to miss it for the world.
• 47:32
  Speaker 4: Grateful that you grew.
• 47:33
  Speaker 2: Yes for your progress me and don't feel like your
• 47:36
  Speaker 2: fairy god parents right now. You're like Timmy Turner.
• 47:40
  Speaker 1: Not for real. You know he is my big bro.
• 47:43
  Speaker 4: I always called frenchy mouth big little sister, even though
• 47:46
  Speaker 4: I'm older.
• 47:47
  Speaker 2: Yes, you you one of the eighty.
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: Ninety baby, y'all making me feel mad? Oh it was.
• 47:57
  Speaker 7: The o G.
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: It was the o G.
• 47:59
  Speaker 2: You're so, what are your plans for the summer? What
• 48:03
  Speaker 2: do you got going on?
• 48:04
  Speaker 4: Keep promoting the book, keep promoting my campaign. Stay in
• 48:08
  Speaker 4: the gym, right you've been in the gym. I go downstairs.
• 48:12
  Speaker 4: I know, I see some fucking.
• 48:13
  Speaker 2: Guns I ain't see before thought the nigga run a strap.
• 48:20
  Speaker 2: Nigga cut his hands like this the whole time, like
• 48:24
  Speaker 2: you guys in the Diamond Diamond he had the whole
• 48:30
  Speaker 2: time like it's the rock.
• 48:34
  Speaker 4: Like please, three or four times out the week. Trying
• 48:40
  Speaker 4: to eat right, you know, that's my big thing, you know,
• 48:43
  Speaker 4: I gotta work on that. I love you, my pastas
• 48:45
  Speaker 4: and my rice and all of that. Stay away from
• 48:47
  Speaker 4: the uber eats, you know, stay away from negativity, positive
• 48:51
  Speaker 4: vibes only, and you know, keep checking in with this
• 48:55
  Speaker 4: this platform that y'all are doing.
• 48:58
  Speaker 1: It's amazing. It's helped me.
• 49:00
  Speaker 4: And the least I can do is try to help
• 49:02
  Speaker 4: y'all any way I can even appreciate.
• 49:04
  Speaker 2: It just being yourself. Thank you so much. And where
• 49:06
  Speaker 2: can we find.
• 49:06
  Speaker 1: Your book Amazon? Right now? Different Perspective Insights for daily living.
• 49:12
  Speaker 2: So there's a link in your bio for it.
• 49:14
  Speaker 1: Link in my bio on Instagram. Mister what chair on
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: all platforms?
• 49:19
  Speaker 2: And what message would you like to leave with the people.
• 49:21
  Speaker 1: Like always never ever be your own handicap?
• 49:26
  Speaker 4: Mister what what mister?
• 49:27
  Speaker 1: What chair?
• 49:28
  Speaker 2: Mister? What chair?
• 49:29
  Speaker 4: Like rap for this, I make these walking niggas look
• 49:37
  Speaker 4: like chalking niggas.
• 49:38
  Speaker 2: Hello, talk about it and that's a rather for blind.
• 49:41
  Speaker 2: But now I see, make sure to continue liking and
• 49:44
  Speaker 2: sharing and subscribing, and we see. We are seeing the
• 49:46
  Speaker 2: d M from the people that have been listening. And
• 49:49
  Speaker 2: we will get back to you in chronological order. Especially
• 49:52
  Speaker 2: if you do not live in New York, it's hard
• 49:56
  Speaker 2: for us to commute. Let us know when you'll be
• 49:58
  Speaker 2: in New York and then we'll schedule something around on that.
• 50:00
  Speaker 2: But thank you for all that you do. Thank you
• 50:02
  Speaker 2: for all your support, thank you for standing there.
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: Whatever.
• 50:05
  Speaker 2: We need to get a name for our fans, well,
• 50:08
  Speaker 2: we need we got to figure that out.
• 50:10
  Speaker 4: We can separate it. I got the blind stuff is
• 50:12
  Speaker 4: you got to work hot well for the pod.
• 50:17
  Speaker 2: I don't know, and racest always want to separated because
• 50:20
  Speaker 2: I'm in a wheelchair. That's the fact I got to
• 50:25
  Speaker 2: I got to stand.
• 50:25
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 50:25
  Speaker 2: So come up with some names for the part, give
• 50:28
  Speaker 2: us some names for our fans, guys, and we love
• 50:30
  Speaker 2: you guys, and happy disability prior month. Remember the only
• 50:33
  Speaker 2: thing that could cripple you is a cripple mindset. We're out.