Latest / Aired Out / Superintendent talks bullying and more with Sweethearts & Heroes as the guiding force

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Superintendent talks bullying and more with Sweethearts & Heroes as the guiding force · Aired Out

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  Speaker 1: US Incas to say.
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  Speaker 2: Doctor at.
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  Speaker 1: Can to sects in incretive US in the sects to
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  Speaker 1: sust of doctor sector.
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  Speaker 3: Good morning. I'm just looking at the UH, at the news,
• 1:41
  Speaker 3: the stuff that is flying in this morning. Berlin Street
• 1:44
  Speaker 3: from Granite Street to Main Street, Montpellier. UH, it's gonna
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  Speaker 3: be closed for a little while because of a pretty
• 1:51
  Speaker 3: good vehicle crash in that area. Emergency crews are unseen,
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  Speaker 3: but please avoid the area again. From Berlin Street to
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  Speaker 3: Granite Street to Main Street in Montpellier closed because of
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  Speaker 3: a crash this morning. A man found dead in his
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  Speaker 3: Brownington home considered suspicious according to state police. That story
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  Speaker 3: is breaking right now this morning. NBC Channel five has
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  Speaker 3: got the details. I'll find out more and get it
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  Speaker 3: up there for you. Plus Federal judge orders man detained
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  Speaker 3: by ice in South Burlington to remain in custody. There's
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  Speaker 3: a lot of stuff that is going on this morning
• 2:36
  Speaker 3: in the news. It is National Sloppy Joe Day today,
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: Open faced or closed for you? I wonder for me
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  Speaker 3: it's a closed face, because I think it's more sloppy
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  Speaker 3: that way. Fourteen days until April Fool's Day, eighteen days
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  Speaker 3: to Easter Sunday. It is coming fast the Facebook question
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  Speaker 3: of today, And I want to ask you this. And
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  Speaker 3: I know that there was an author that once said
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  Speaker 3: we need four hugs a day for survival, eight hugs
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  Speaker 3: a day for maintenance, and twelve hugs a day for growth.
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  Speaker 3: And I can't remember who that author is, but interesting,
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  Speaker 3: how many do you get a day? How many hugs
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  Speaker 3: a day do you get? And we're going to talk
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  Speaker 3: about this. Never underestimate the power of a hug. Our
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  Speaker 3: community calendar is just jammed. We have, of course Wing
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  Speaker 3: Wednesday over at the VFW Post seven ninety to night
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  Speaker 3: at five o'clock. We got Stomp at the Flynn. We
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  Speaker 3: haven't done so already. Deb Phillips with us on a
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  Speaker 3: Wednesday morning morning, Deb.
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  Speaker 4: How are you good morning? Doing good?
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  Speaker 3: This morning sun is shining, getting ready yes for Chris
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  Speaker 3: to be bringing by my new fresh copy of the
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  Speaker 3: World today.
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  Speaker 5: What's in it dep Well, it's cabin Fever weekend in
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  Speaker 5: mont Failure, and we have a full page of.
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  Speaker 4: Advertisers with store discounts. It's this Friday and Saturday, so
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  Speaker 4: you need to pick up a copy of the World
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  Speaker 4: with local professionals who are ready to help you with
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  Speaker 4: your home renovations and improvements.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, you guys have it seems like you've been doing
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  Speaker 3: a lot of that lately, and it is so so
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  Speaker 3: needed because when you need a plumber and electrician, you
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  Speaker 3: need someone to clean the carpets, whatever you need it now.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah.
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  Speaker 5: No, I just saw somebody on the front Porch forum
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  Speaker 5: looking for someone that's cleans rugs in the area. I
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  Speaker 5: emailed them right back ask our services, you know, I
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  Speaker 5: mean so it's uh, it's you know people, you know,
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  Speaker 5: when they need something.
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  Speaker 4: They don't always remember where to go to find it.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, and we should say this to the Berry City
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  Speaker 3: resident chat uh followers on Facebook. Uh, we see a
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  Speaker 3: lot of questions that are popping up on that platform.
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  Speaker 3: Go to the world first. It's probably going to be
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  Speaker 3: answered right there for you.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, we usually have the help. We can help
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  Speaker 4: people with their with their questions for sure.
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  Speaker 3: Well, we're looking forward to the new copy today. Anything
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  Speaker 3: else you can think of, deb you want to plug, well, I.
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  Speaker 4: Don't think you for a second.
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  Speaker 5: Well, well, last Nation on Friday has the Cabin Fever
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  Speaker 5: kickoff party. Oh yeah, and so that, yeah, that's in
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  Speaker 5: my pillier to Friday the twentieth at.
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  Speaker 2: Good stuff, a lot of fun.
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  Speaker 3: Thank you, dev Thank you so much for joining us
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  Speaker 3: this morning.
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  Speaker 4: All right, thanks Jadi.
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  Speaker 3: And every Wednesday, and you know, don't forget meet Bingo
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  Speaker 3: at the American Legion on Friday night. They're always posting
• 6:22
  Speaker 3: stuff that's happening at the Legion in the world newspaper,
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  Speaker 3: good stuff, great stuff. This morning, I got a guy
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  Speaker 3: who is joining me right now, at least he's going
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  Speaker 3: to be joining me that I have heard so much about.
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  Speaker 3: And when Tom Murphy on Wednesday says, you know we
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  Speaker 3: do Sweethearts and Heroes day. When Tom Murphy tells me, hey,
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  Speaker 3: this next guest you got, you gotta have this guy
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  Speaker 3: on or this lady on, they are the real deal,
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  Speaker 3: as he has said several times about dark fish. Who's
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  Speaker 3: with us A almost retired superintendent of schools. Good morning,
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  Speaker 3: my friend. How are you?
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  Speaker 2: I'm good JD. How are you? Man?
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  Speaker 3: Forty something years? Have you lost? Count?
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  Speaker 2: Thirty nine and hopefully final year in the business.
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  Speaker 6: I retired four years ago and every year I figure
• 7:28
  Speaker 6: out how to find my way back to work around January.
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  Speaker 6: But that means I have the summers off and the
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  Speaker 6: falls off, which is beautiful up here in the greater
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  Speaker 6: Saratoga Springs area.
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  Speaker 3: I was just going to ask you exactly where you
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  Speaker 3: are Saratoga Springs, all right, so listen. I'm gonna most
• 7:46
  Speaker 3: most questions I'm going to ask you this morning are
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  Speaker 3: pretty going to be pretty easy, enlightened fun. I might
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  Speaker 3: ask you a tough question which you're probably not going
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  Speaker 3: to think is tough at all. Yesterday we were talking
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  Speaker 3: about bullying quite a bit on the air and had
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  Speaker 3: a mom, a local mom that was returning to the
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  Speaker 3: microphones here it aired out yesterday to talk about her situation.
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  Speaker 3: So I might ask you, as his superintendent, about bullying,
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  Speaker 3: which I know is a huge umbrella. There's a lot
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  Speaker 3: of factors that go into that. But first off, man,
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  Speaker 3: it's like I got to know you know. First off,
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  Speaker 3: you're you're the dad of Pat Fish, who is a
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  Speaker 3: major hitter with Sweethearts and Heroes. This guy does not
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  Speaker 3: fool around.
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  Speaker 6: Well, you know, one of the reasons I accepted the
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  Speaker 6: opportunity to speak with you this morning is I get to,
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  Speaker 6: you know, speak unfiltered regarding Tom, Yes, Pat and the
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  Speaker 6: whole gang.
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  Speaker 2: So, as you know, I was around it for the
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  Speaker 2: first Sweethearts and hero show.
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  Speaker 6: So I've seen the growth over the years and certainly
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  Speaker 6: have watched a lot of things happen and with that organization.
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  Speaker 3: So which came Which came first? Mark or Pat when
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  Speaker 3: it comes to Sweethearts and Heroes?
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  Speaker 2: Oh me, bye a lot.
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  Speaker 3: Good there you go.
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  Speaker 2: That just that just means I'm old though, you know. Yeah.
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  Speaker 3: So, so how did you How did you as the
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  Speaker 3: superintendent overseeing God only can imagine how many staff members,
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  Speaker 3: how many schools, how many kids.
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  Speaker 6: So I started out teaching in Johnstown, New York. I
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  Speaker 6: was a physic, that teacher and a coach. I was
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  Speaker 6: there for nine years.
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  Speaker 2: It was I always say, not half jokingly, that it
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  Speaker 2: was the best job I've ever had.
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  Speaker 6: I moved back to my hometown as a middle school principal.
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  Speaker 6: Spent eighteen years there and raised our three kids, and
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  Speaker 6: they all one way or another, survived me as a
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  Speaker 6: middle school principal.
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  Speaker 5: Then.
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  Speaker 6: Actually the last thing I did in Southland's follows was
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  Speaker 6: give Patrick's diploma, and I spent eight wonderful years in
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  Speaker 6: the Greenwich Central School District as the superintendent.
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  Speaker 2: I retired from there and I've.
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  Speaker 6: Done four interms currently Saratoga Springs at Maple Avenue Avenue
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  Speaker 6: Middle School, we have just under fourteen hundred kids here,
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  Speaker 6: so they keep me busy every day.
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  Speaker 3: Fourteen hundred kids.
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  Speaker 2: It's a big middle school, my man.
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  Speaker 3: And it almost looks like you might be losing some hair,
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  Speaker 3: you know what.
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  Speaker 2: I keep waiting, you know, thirty nine years in counting,
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  Speaker 2: I still have some, so that's good.
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  Speaker 3: And so when is retirement?
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  Speaker 6: So I'm done here April second. Saratoga went through a
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  Speaker 6: rigorous process, obviously to hire a.
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  Speaker 2: New leader of this building.
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  Speaker 6: Work with three very capable and strong assistant principles here,
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  Speaker 6: and then you know countless teachers, non instructional folks, and
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  Speaker 6: again all the all the kids. So it's it's a
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  Speaker 6: big job. But I think it's been a great challenge,
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  Speaker 6: and I think Saratoga is a you know, a wonderful
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  Speaker 6: place to learn.
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  Speaker 3: Wow, your son Pat, who is so involved with sweethearts
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  Speaker 3: and heroes, he's one of the one of the one
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  Speaker 3: of the upper echelon members of the team there. He
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  Speaker 3: is just crushing it.
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  Speaker 1: Man.
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  Speaker 3: He's making all kinds of impacts on teachers and students,
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  Speaker 3: I should say students and teachers everywhere.
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  Speaker 6: Sure, when you say everywhere, one of the things I've
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  Speaker 6: said to town forever is, you know, and they keep
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  Speaker 6: slowly working on it is you know, hats in his car.
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  Speaker 6: He spends more time in his car than just about
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  Speaker 6: anybody I know, because he does want to make that impact.
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  Speaker 6: And they've done some really good efforts the past couple
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  Speaker 6: of years to do some more regionalizing. They brought in
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  Speaker 6: a couple more people in past role and I think
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  Speaker 6: that's that's been good for the organization. You know, in
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  Speaker 6: the early days of Pat traveling, it wasn't unusual for
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  Speaker 6: him to you know, be in Buffalo and then Long
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  Speaker 6: Island and then up to the North Country, you know,
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  Speaker 6: in the.
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  Speaker 2: Same week, which is you know, a lot of time
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  Speaker 2: in the car. He jokes off.
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  Speaker 6: I've heard him joke about, you know, the number of
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  Speaker 6: books on tape that he's listened to over the years,
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  Speaker 6: just because of the time he spends in his car.
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  Speaker 3: He has a he has a real aura about him
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  Speaker 3: which really stands out. And not only is he a
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  Speaker 3: smart cookie, but he has a really in depth perspective
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  Speaker 3: on how to look at things. And I maybe this
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  Speaker 3: is a little bit of Tom Ruppin off on them,
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  Speaker 3: but it's got to be a direct reflection of you,
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  Speaker 3: my friend.
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  Speaker 6: It has to be well, you know, I would give
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  Speaker 6: his mother a lot of credit too. She was a teacher,
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  Speaker 6: certainly big heart care for kids, coaching. Pat grew up
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  Speaker 6: in schools. Our kids were constantly at events, between my
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  Speaker 6: wife teaching and coaching and me running buildings and getting
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  Speaker 6: them to all of their stuff. We were busy and
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  Speaker 6: they were always in the public. So all three of
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  Speaker 6: my kids had to be people persons. They had to
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  Speaker 6: engage with the public from the time they were very
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  Speaker 6: very little. I'd like to think that all three of
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  Speaker 6: my kids are very empathetic people. I think that's maybe
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  Speaker 6: a credit to how they were raised and what they've
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  Speaker 6: been exposed to and how my wife and I interact
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  Speaker 6: with people Patrick certainly. I think one of the formative
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  Speaker 6: events in his in his life was the Southlends Falls
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  Speaker 6: Marathon Dance. He was a chairperson for three years. You know,
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  Speaker 6: they've raised millions of dollars since the next year will
• 14:11
  Speaker 6: be the fiftieth year and Pat's still involved. So the
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  Speaker 6: first week in every March, you can find Pat at
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  Speaker 6: the South Time Marathon Dance, interacting with the next generation
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  Speaker 6: of kids who are dancing and trying to trying to
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  Speaker 6: help other people that are in need and organizations in need.
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  Speaker 6: He helps run the social media, actually he runs it,
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  Speaker 6: coordinates it. We interact with the media at the event,
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  Speaker 6: which sometimes is fairly substantial.
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  Speaker 2: So he gives back. And you know, those three years
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  Speaker 2: I think leading that student run organization in Southwnds Falls
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  Speaker 2: really were impactful for Pat.
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  Speaker 6: Pat was always the kind of kid that you know,
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  Speaker 6: that that students looked up to. You know, he'll be
• 14:56
  Speaker 6: embarrassed for me to say that he was his his
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  Speaker 6: prom king. He but he but he didn't want to
• 15:03
  Speaker 6: really go to the prom and he really didn't want to.
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  Speaker 2: Go back next year. So it's, uh, that's the kind
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  Speaker 2: of that's the kind of guy Pat is And now.
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  Speaker 3: Look at this guy. I mean he's sporting pink suits.
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  Speaker 3: I mean, look at.
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  Speaker 2: This Yeah, we're off. We're all for proud of him. Uh,
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: you know we you know, the nails are interesting.
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  Speaker 6: I always think, you know, and thank God for a
• 15:23
  Speaker 6: listen because she remembers what color goes on?
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: What what now?
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: And you know, all of those sorts of things.
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  Speaker 6: So you know, Joe and I are thrilled to have
• 15:32
  Speaker 6: a list his his wife will listen in the family
• 15:35
  Speaker 6: that way. You know, we're not watching Pat all the
• 15:38
  Speaker 6: time now now, I said on their wedding day to Alyssa,
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  Speaker 6: he's all yours.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, we're gonna get serious here and just a little
• 15:46
  Speaker 3: bit heads up. As a superintendent of forty years, you know,
• 15:52
  Speaker 3: overseeing a lot of children, I am going to be
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  Speaker 3: asking you about bullying. But first, what do you what
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  Speaker 3: do you? What do you say? What are you saying
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  Speaker 3: to Pat who is about to become a first time father?
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  Speaker 2: You know what, He's getting a lot of advice, not
• 16:14
  Speaker 2: not a whole lot from USh yet.
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: Uh.
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  Speaker 2: You know, I think he's ready. Alyssa is ready to
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: supportive families.
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  Speaker 6: Her family certainly very engaged with, you know, the raising
• 16:27
  Speaker 6: of a wonderful young woman and hopefully Patrick as well.
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  Speaker 2: I know they got some advice over the weekend.
• 16:34
  Speaker 6: They had a baby shower and my oldest Kelsey was
• 16:38
  Speaker 6: home with with her son Damian, my grandson, and I
• 16:42
  Speaker 6: know they got they got some advice from young parents,
• 16:46
  Speaker 6: first time parents over the weekend. So I think, you know,
• 16:50
  Speaker 6: one of the things I said to Patt and his friends,
• 16:53
  Speaker 6: you know, you really have to operate as a team
• 16:56
  Speaker 6: to to really you know, because one you can't the.
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  Speaker 2: Mother shouldn't be doing something. The father just shouldn't be
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  Speaker 2: doing something. It's a team effort.
• 17:03
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
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  Speaker 6: And if you're stress, the baby, you'll be stressed. Those
• 17:06
  Speaker 6: are the two things that my wisdom that I've imparted
• 17:11
  Speaker 6: so far.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's it's fantastic. And of course he's he's got
• 17:17
  Speaker 3: some great parents, so he's got a he's got a
• 17:19
  Speaker 3: clear head. He knows. You know, he's gonna be changing
• 17:22
  Speaker 3: some diapers, that's for sure. That's gonna be coming real soon.
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: Longda's grandpa doesn't have to change too many. I've been
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: through that already. You know.
• 17:33
  Speaker 3: I have to ask you, what what was it that
• 17:37
  Speaker 3: made you drawn to sweethearts and heroes back in I'm
• 17:44
  Speaker 3: guessing twenty sixteen ish seventeen, somewhere in that ballpark.
• 17:49
  Speaker 6: Yeah, maybe even a little sooner. So I was the
• 17:52
  Speaker 6: principal of the middle school in Southlend's Falls. I hadn't
• 17:58
  Speaker 6: met Tom.
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: One of one of my.
• 18:01
  Speaker 6: Teachers, a phys ed teacher, Jason Spector, who was a
• 18:06
  Speaker 6: co founder of Sweethearts and Heroes with Tom, was one
• 18:10
  Speaker 6: of my teachers. And you know, without getting too far
• 18:14
  Speaker 6: into the weeds, Jason lost a lost a student and
• 18:18
  Speaker 6: was being very reflective and why and you know, could
• 18:23
  Speaker 6: he have done something different?
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  Speaker 2: And so Jason and I had a ton of conversations
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: about that over that year.
• 18:30
  Speaker 6: And at the same time, unbeknownst to me, he was
• 18:33
  Speaker 6: speaking with his college wrestling teammate Tom Murphy and the
• 18:37
  Speaker 6: two of them hatched the idea of Sweethearts and Heroes.
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: At some point they pitched it to me. You know,
• 18:45
  Speaker 2: I try to support risk taking.
• 18:48
  Speaker 6: You know, I'm one to say all right, So they
• 18:51
  Speaker 6: they asked me if you know, they pitched it as
• 18:53
  Speaker 6: being good for kids. They asked me if they could
• 18:58
  Speaker 6: do their first presentation at my middle school. You know,
• 19:02
  Speaker 6: I figured it couldn't go too bad because Jason was
• 19:04
  Speaker 6: pretty well respected by the student body. And there you
• 19:08
  Speaker 6: have it, the first Sweethearts and Heroes presentation at Oliver W.
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: Wench Middle School in Southland's Falls.
• 19:15
  Speaker 3: Wow. And you've had them at your schools since so yep,
• 19:22
  Speaker 3: so a number of school We had them in Greenwich
• 19:25
  Speaker 3: is one of the first, uh superintendent as a superintendent Greenwich.
• 19:29
  Speaker 6: One of the first opening days, I had Rick and
• 19:32
  Speaker 6: Tom there with and and that was in the days
• 19:35
  Speaker 6: when Otis was traveling with with Tom. He was he
• 19:38
  Speaker 6: was the big hit, the Otis the dog and he
• 19:43
  Speaker 6: was a superhero himself. And uh so they came, they
• 19:47
  Speaker 6: did a wonderful kickoff, really started to actually my superintendency
• 19:52
  Speaker 6: off on a great foot, and I just felt it
• 19:53
  Speaker 6: was important to have them there to deliver deliver the message,
• 19:57
  Speaker 6: uh you know, about students and how we can support
• 20:01
  Speaker 6: them and so forth. So that they've been around a
• 20:04
  Speaker 6: long time, I'm with with the books that they've written.
• 20:08
  Speaker 6: Most of the schools I've done these interims since APT
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  Speaker 6: I bring.
• 20:12
  Speaker 7: Books, I drop them off for them to use so
• 20:15
  Speaker 7: they are exposed and oftentimes, as happened at Salem, you know,
• 20:21
  Speaker 7: there's a relationship for him there and sweethearts and heroes
• 20:25
  Speaker 7: become part of the culture.
• 20:27
  Speaker 3: Is Thirteen Pillows one of the one of the books
• 20:30
  Speaker 3: that you're pushing one of.
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: The books, sure, Pat's poetry books. So both both of
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: them are there are pretty uh staple drops drop offs
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: for me when I when I work at a school, Yeah,
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: I want, I want to.
• 20:45
  Speaker 3: I want to tell you, first of all, it's it's
• 20:48
  Speaker 3: it's in honor to to have the time to speak,
• 20:51
  Speaker 3: frankly with any superintendent in any school district anywhere. I
• 20:57
  Speaker 3: can't imagine how busy you are, what you've got going
• 21:01
  Speaker 3: on every day. But I just want to say this.
• 21:07
  Speaker 3: We have a community here in Central Vermont that has
• 21:13
  Speaker 3: been poking me and kind of sounding the alarm quite
• 21:20
  Speaker 3: a bit about a recurring, continual issue of bullying here
• 21:30
  Speaker 3: in Central Vermont as a whole. I should also say
• 21:37
  Speaker 3: that there are some schools here in Central Vermont that
• 21:41
  Speaker 3: have gotten more of a grasp on it than others.
• 21:47
  Speaker 3: And I say this with a ton of respect this
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: morning that I don't know. I'm not in the school system.
• 21:56
  Speaker 3: I don't work at a school. I can only imagine,
• 22:00
  Speaker 3: I can only imagine being a teacher, being any kind
• 22:04
  Speaker 3: of administrator, a principal superintendent. I know that you guys
• 22:09
  Speaker 3: are dealing with a lot of stuff that has frankly
• 22:13
  Speaker 3: nothing to do with curriculum, and everything to do with
• 22:19
  Speaker 3: the side of the times, our society, our culture, what's
• 22:22
  Speaker 3: happening post COVID, Internet. The list goes on and on
• 22:31
  Speaker 3: and on. There's always going to be parents who maybe
• 22:38
  Speaker 3: really aren't cut out to be great parents, who aren't
• 22:40
  Speaker 3: giving their kids the attention and the focus that they should.
• 22:50
  Speaker 3: It seems like there's more domestic stuff now than ever.
• 22:54
  Speaker 3: There's more breakups than ever. The family culture and roots.
• 23:04
  Speaker 2: Is not.
• 23:06
  Speaker 3: As healthy and as deep as it seems like it
• 23:11
  Speaker 3: was when I was a kid, when we would all
• 23:14
  Speaker 3: sit around the kitchen table every night talk about our day,
• 23:17
  Speaker 3: what was good about it, what was bad about it.
• 23:21
  Speaker 3: There are kids who are being ignored. There are kids
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: who are being distracted by other things that are going
• 23:30
  Speaker 3: on in their lives outside of school, and they are
• 23:33
  Speaker 3: packing that stuff in their backpacks and bringing it to
• 23:38
  Speaker 3: school every day, and it is a huge deterrent for them.
• 23:45
  Speaker 3: And the teachers are picking up the weight. Not just
• 23:50
  Speaker 3: the teachers, the whole administration is picking up the weight
• 23:56
  Speaker 3: here and trying to bridge the gap and these kids
• 24:01
  Speaker 3: as healthy mentally healthy as possible. Bullying is an issue
• 24:07
  Speaker 3: that is everywhere. Would you agree with that?
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: I was waiting for the question. That was quite a
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: pack statement.
• 24:18
  Speaker 3: I know, I know, I've had my coffee.
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: Man, I listened. I listened to the whole thing.
• 24:26
  Speaker 6: A couple, I would say, a couple of things rather
• 24:28
  Speaker 6: than just jumping right to do you believe there's bullying?
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: Because there is? I agree with that. I do also
• 24:34
  Speaker 2: believe that bullying is a little misunderstood. Sometimes it's student
• 24:40
  Speaker 2: conflict and how students can their coping skills, Yeah, you know,
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: understanding how to interact with each other. So bullying is,
• 24:50
  Speaker 2: you know sometimes I think gets this huge umbrella.
• 24:55
  Speaker 3: It's subjective.
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's.
• 24:59
  Speaker 6: I think sometimes it's it's uh, the inability to consistently
• 25:06
  Speaker 6: have a relation, a respectful relationship, where bullying is somebody
• 25:12
  Speaker 6: really has a power imbalance over somebody else. There's an
• 25:16
  Speaker 6: imbalance and you know what that that can really easily
• 25:22
  Speaker 6: be defined as bullying. And actually, in some respects, those
• 25:25
  Speaker 6: are those are a little bit easier to address than
• 25:28
  Speaker 6: some of these interpersonal relationships that we're seeing with kids.
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: There was a whole host of reasons for that.
• 25:34
  Speaker 6: You know, pre COVID, we we had we had some
• 25:38
  Speaker 6: mental health challenges coming to our schools. I was a
• 25:40
  Speaker 6: superintendent during COVID, kept the school district open for two
• 25:44
  Speaker 6: very challenging years, and we did, you know, we.
• 25:47
  Speaker 2: Stood on our heads to make sure we did everything
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: we could for the kids so that they wouldn't lose
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: too much. But they did right. So most importantly I would.
• 25:56
  Speaker 6: Say in that in that time, we had a we
• 25:59
  Speaker 6: had a mental health crisis on the rise, and then
• 26:02
  Speaker 6: you had two years where kids did not have their
• 26:06
  Speaker 6: their consistent school growth pattern to thrive and grow in.
• 26:13
  Speaker 6: And in those in those two years, we really put
• 26:16
  Speaker 6: gasoline out of fire with some of these kids and
• 26:18
  Speaker 6: their ability not only academically but socially, emotionally and physically
• 26:24
  Speaker 6: well being. So, you know, I said to my teachers
• 26:26
  Speaker 6: for a million years, you know, in order for us
• 26:30
  Speaker 6: to teach kids, we have to make sure we're focusing
• 26:33
  Speaker 6: on supporting them not only academically, but socially, emotionally and physically,
• 26:40
  Speaker 6: making sure that their growth is something that's well rounded.
• 26:44
  Speaker 6: And if we can if we get those three things,
• 26:48
  Speaker 6: if we address those three things. Then the teaching becomes
• 26:52
  Speaker 6: something that's easier to do. Learning becomes something that's easier
• 26:55
  Speaker 6: to do, and then the more the kids struggle, the more.
• 26:58
  Speaker 2: Challenging it is to learn and academically. In your wall
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: and your statement to.
• 27:03
  Speaker 6: Me at the start of this question, there was a
• 27:06
  Speaker 6: lot there and that all that all talks about the
• 27:08
  Speaker 6: challenges at school, right, the support systems that are in
• 27:13
  Speaker 6: place at school for these kids that have don't have
• 27:17
  Speaker 6: the support systems in the rest of their lives, and
• 27:20
  Speaker 6: schools really are That's the big difference in schools in
• 27:23
  Speaker 6: the past forty years. You know, he used to have
• 27:26
  Speaker 6: everybody had a guidance counselor well, we have all kinds
• 27:29
  Speaker 6: of supports now because schools are the places that consistently
• 27:33
  Speaker 6: see kids, and schools are really focusing on support systems
• 27:40
  Speaker 6: for students, especially the ones that are struggling.
• 27:43
  Speaker 3: And we should mention resource officers too. I'm guessing maybe
• 27:48
  Speaker 3: you've got some of those.
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: We have a resource officer here assigned to my school
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: invaluable they you know, some people are.
• 28:00
  Speaker 5: Are.
• 28:00
  Speaker 6: I think bringing a resource officer to the school it
• 28:04
  Speaker 6: brings things that it really doesn't, you know, the resource
• 28:08
  Speaker 6: officer I work with over the years.
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: They are visible, they are kid oriented.
• 28:14
  Speaker 6: Kids will go to them and talk about things that
• 28:17
  Speaker 6: they might there's somebody that a number of kids respect.
• 28:21
  Speaker 2: Helps. It's a two way street.
• 28:22
  Speaker 6: We build respect for the for the police the police,
• 28:26
  Speaker 6: and turn build respect with the student body. Our resource
• 28:31
  Speaker 6: officer here is very visible in the cafeterias, in the hallways,
• 28:37
  Speaker 6: and then when something does happen, they're they're accessible and
• 28:40
  Speaker 6: we work at it together.
• 28:42
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Interesting, Sweethearts and Heroes brings a program into the
• 28:50
  Speaker 3: schools that is tailored, custom tailored for all different grades ages.
• 28:59
  Speaker 3: We're all developmentally at different stages in our lives. We
• 29:03
  Speaker 3: process things, we understand things differently. But Tom is going
• 29:08
  Speaker 3: that they start as young as they can go to
• 29:14
  Speaker 3: bring into their presentations messages of respect, but also recognizing
• 29:24
  Speaker 3: through role play the differences between just being a kid
• 29:32
  Speaker 3: and joking around and having fun versus something that with
• 29:40
  Speaker 3: repetition might become something that is hurtful or unwanted. Laughter
• 29:49
  Speaker 3: gets brought into the mix, it gets complicated, but Tom
• 29:54
  Speaker 3: is able to take these young minds and get them
• 29:57
  Speaker 3: to realize what the difference says between having fun and
• 30:03
  Speaker 3: getting your your feelings or or otherwise hurt. But then
• 30:11
  Speaker 3: also giving the older students the tools the knowledge to
• 30:16
  Speaker 3: recognize this stuff too, and then to kind of incorporate
• 30:19
  Speaker 3: what what Tom and Sweethearts and Heroes is doing and
• 30:23
  Speaker 3: carrying the baton here and and I mean Tom and
• 30:26
  Speaker 3: and Rick and the and the guys can't be in
• 30:29
  Speaker 3: every school every day, but the fact that they've they've
• 30:33
  Speaker 3: they've taught these other students and these other administrators this
• 30:42
  Speaker 3: and infiltrated this into these schools is massive. That's that's
• 30:47
  Speaker 3: where things are really sustainable for Sweethearts and Heroes.
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: Sure, you know, uh, you go to a good school.
• 30:55
  Speaker 6: The students certainly feel empowered in their school when they
• 31:00
  Speaker 6: see something wrong to report it or if it's on
• 31:04
  Speaker 6: a and like you said, on a base level and
• 31:06
  Speaker 6: a friend group say hey, that's not not that's that
• 31:08
  Speaker 6: that that that is a grassroots empowering students to help
• 31:14
  Speaker 6: help themselves and to police their peer group. You know,
• 31:17
  Speaker 6: back back, I know when I was a kid, that
• 31:20
  Speaker 6: sort of thing used to happen on the playground. Right, Yeah,
• 31:24
  Speaker 6: kids don't have free play the way that they used to.
• 31:26
  Speaker 6: Parents sign them up for things, bring them the things
• 31:29
  Speaker 6: so adults are always driving these things, So there was
• 31:32
  Speaker 6: a gap I think over the years, and and kids'
• 31:36
  Speaker 6: ability to learn how to solve those problems themselves and
• 31:40
  Speaker 6: sweethearts and heroes really delivers an important message about those
• 31:45
  Speaker 6: types of relationships, that type of human interaction, that type
• 31:51
  Speaker 6: of interactions that we all see as kids are growing up,
• 31:56
  Speaker 6: and what to do when you see something that you
• 31:59
  Speaker 6: know your gut tells you isn't right. And so all
• 32:02
  Speaker 6: of those are skills that not only serve, like you said,
• 32:06
  Speaker 6: our young students at their developmental level, but all the
• 32:10
  Speaker 6: way through to adulthood.
• 32:11
  Speaker 2: Right, how often do you see something and you go, teez,
• 32:15
  Speaker 2: that's not right? And me as a as a building administrator,
• 32:18
  Speaker 2: you know, certainly I have a responsibility to work with
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: adults who sometimes don't always act right or say the
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: right thing.
• 32:26
  Speaker 6: And I can't tell you the number of parent conversations
• 32:29
  Speaker 6: I've had where I've had to say to the parent, look,
• 32:31
  Speaker 6: we don't I'll talk to you about anything, but I'm
• 32:34
  Speaker 6: not going to let you yell at me.
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: And I certainly don't have anybody swear at me on
• 32:38
  Speaker 2: the phone. You know, those types of things, those are
• 32:40
  Speaker 2: those are basic respectful human interactions. And so you know,
• 32:45
  Speaker 2: I think I think Rick and Tom and their.
• 32:47
  Speaker 6: Messaging and then certainly the sustainable approach to bringing circle
• 32:52
  Speaker 6: to your building. What Pat does and what some of
• 32:55
  Speaker 6: the other folks in the organization do help help build
• 32:58
  Speaker 6: that culture. And then you know, they have certainly some
• 33:01
  Speaker 6: real strong examples of schools that have embraced the culture.
• 33:06
  Speaker 6: And it's now student driven, right, so the students are
• 33:09
  Speaker 6: running things that are that are really beneficial to the
• 33:15
  Speaker 6: student body.
• 33:17
  Speaker 3: What do you what do you say, Mark two other schools,
• 33:27
  Speaker 3: other superintendents that haven't yet considered or may not be
• 33:35
  Speaker 3: familiar with Sweethearts and heroes.
• 33:39
  Speaker 6: Sure, well, I'll go back to the beginning when when
• 33:43
  Speaker 6: they were trying to bring this to other schools besides
• 33:45
  Speaker 6: their their tryout at Oliver Winch in Southoand's falls and
• 33:51
  Speaker 6: Tom's initial presentation. Maybe he still does it. You know
• 33:55
  Speaker 6: Tom's work with you know the m M A and
• 33:59
  Speaker 6: the and the fighting part of it. You know, you
• 34:04
  Speaker 6: ring the bell and there's Tom on the screen and
• 34:06
  Speaker 6: he's in the ring, and you know he initially he
• 34:11
  Speaker 6: was like he was worried that that wasn't something that
• 34:16
  Speaker 6: other schools would understand, and I was very easily able
• 34:20
  Speaker 6: to say, look, that's the hook for the kids.
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, the kids like, wow, look at that
• 34:25
  Speaker 2: guy and he's doing this, and then the message is
• 34:29
  Speaker 2: very clear within minutes of the start of his presentation.
• 34:33
  Speaker 6: And it's something that I think, you know, you got
• 34:36
  Speaker 6: to meet the kids at their level. You got to
• 34:37
  Speaker 6: find a hook, you got to find things that they're
• 34:39
  Speaker 6: interested in, and then from there to your point. I
• 34:44
  Speaker 6: think if you're not doing everything you can as a
• 34:48
  Speaker 6: school district to support students, and some kids get messages
• 34:52
  Speaker 6: in different ways, right, they might they might see this
• 34:55
  Speaker 6: and that'll there will sweet to heroes, and I make
• 34:57
  Speaker 6: a big difference. Some respond, well, maybe they're bus drivers
• 35:01
  Speaker 6: or hero and it's somebody that they interact with. So
• 35:04
  Speaker 6: it really I think you really need to go at
• 35:09
  Speaker 6: this in a number of different ways. Some schools bring presentations.
• 35:15
  Speaker 2: On whatever the topic they do at once and they
• 35:17
  Speaker 2: think they've got it licked. Yes, this is not. That
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: is not the way to.
• 35:24
  Speaker 6: Make any change in your school or your school district.
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: Systemic.
• 35:32
  Speaker 6: It's something that you have to repeat, it's something you
• 35:35
  Speaker 6: have to support, it's something you have to model. It's
• 35:38
  Speaker 6: something that the adults have to buy into. It's something
• 35:41
  Speaker 6: that the student body has to embrace and buy into.
• 35:44
  Speaker 6: So so thinking that one presentation is going to do
• 35:48
  Speaker 6: that is crazy. But knowing that you have a sustained
• 35:52
  Speaker 6: relationship and you're trying to do a number of things
• 35:56
  Speaker 6: to address, you know, the culture of the student body,
• 35:59
  Speaker 6: that culture of the building, how we interact with each other,
• 36:03
  Speaker 6: how students interact with each other. I think it requires
• 36:08
  Speaker 6: a commitment from a district, and it requires a sustained effort,
• 36:14
  Speaker 6: and I think it needs to be a holistic approach.
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: It needs to be everybody, Yeah, what what what do you?
• 36:23
  Speaker 3: What do you say though too? To a superintendent right
• 36:30
  Speaker 3: now who may or may not be listening that or
• 36:36
  Speaker 3: maybe listening later, who is a little discouraged because it
• 36:40
  Speaker 3: can't really get a couple of things really figured out
• 36:43
  Speaker 3: well in their district.
• 36:49
  Speaker 6: Okay, So so this anything that's top down never sticks, right.
• 36:54
  Speaker 6: So I if I stand up there as the king
• 36:56
  Speaker 6: of the school district and decrease something as opposed to
• 37:00
  Speaker 6: supporting something and allowing that growth to be something that
• 37:06
  Speaker 6: comes from the building level, that that that you think
• 37:09
  Speaker 6: is something that you want to work on with the faculty.
• 37:12
  Speaker 6: I would say to to a superintendent that can't quite
• 37:16
  Speaker 6: get there, that you can't do it alone.
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: You've got to coach your team. You've got to you've
• 37:21
  Speaker 2: gotta lead your orchestra.
• 37:23
  Speaker 6: However you want to, however you want to say that,
• 37:26
  Speaker 6: but it can't be a decree and then a we
• 37:30
  Speaker 6: fix bullying. It's got to be comprehensive approach. I would
• 37:34
  Speaker 6: encourage those folks to have a conversation with Tom. He's
• 37:38
  Speaker 6: pretty persuasive, you know, visit a presentation. I used to
• 37:42
  Speaker 6: say that all the time with people would call me
• 37:44
  Speaker 6: about sweethearts and heroes. I would say, look, they're going
• 37:46
  Speaker 6: to be in ex school district next week.
• 37:49
  Speaker 2: Why don't you go see what they're doing. Why don't
• 37:51
  Speaker 2: you go see what they're doing with kids?
• 37:53
  Speaker 6: I know I was with the Middle School Association Board
• 37:57
  Speaker 6: of Directors for a number of years and formed a
• 38:00
  Speaker 6: relationship early on with with Jason and Tom and Rick
• 38:06
  Speaker 6: and got them in front of middle school administrators and teachers.
• 38:11
  Speaker 6: And certainly that you can see the seeds of that
• 38:14
  Speaker 6: with their travels in New York State, because they have
• 38:19
  Speaker 6: their message is an important one, and I think it's
• 38:22
  Speaker 6: important that they you know, they get out and you know,
• 38:27
  Speaker 6: see what message they have and and and embrace that
• 38:30
  Speaker 6: for their school districts.
• 38:32
  Speaker 3: And tip of the hat to talk about these these
• 38:37
  Speaker 3: Chevy Dealers that are making sure that this is happening.
• 38:44
  Speaker 6: Yeah, that's that's community right, So Rick, Rick and Tom
• 38:48
  Speaker 6: have found a way to uh embrace the community approach.
• 38:54
  Speaker 6: The Chevy Dealers apparently have recognized the need in their
• 38:58
  Speaker 6: community and stepped in to fill They fill the gap
• 39:01
  Speaker 6: for the students and and the families in Central Vermont.
• 39:05
  Speaker 6: And I think that's that's a great model of support
• 39:09
  Speaker 6: from those folks.
• 39:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah, they're wonderful, wonderful people and they get it. That's
• 39:15
  Speaker 3: the whole thing. They understand that this is super important
• 39:18
  Speaker 3: stuff and it needs to be in our schools.
• 39:21
  Speaker 2: Sure.
• 39:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I want to ask you as we uh as
• 39:28
  Speaker 3: we wrap up this morning, have you had Pat? Yeah
• 39:35
  Speaker 3: you know this question was coming away, Mark, Ye have
• 39:39
  Speaker 3: have you had Pat in your office door, closed whatever
• 39:46
  Speaker 3: age and said, what you're in trouble?
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: You know what? Pat was too good to get in trouble.
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: Come on, he found out early. He'll tell you this himself.
• 39:59
  Speaker 3: He want make make something up here, Bud, make something up.
• 40:03
  Speaker 2: He was really good at signing my name or my
• 40:06
  Speaker 2: wife's name to everything that came home that had to
• 40:09
  Speaker 2: be signed.
• 40:11
  Speaker 7: He was, uh, he was.
• 40:13
  Speaker 6: He got in trouble on a school bus once an
• 40:15
  Speaker 6: elementary school, and you know, we put headphones out of him,
• 40:19
  Speaker 6: and that that and and that didn't happen again, you know,
• 40:23
  Speaker 6: and he was you know. I had to have a
• 40:24
  Speaker 6: talk with him at the end of his sophomore year
• 40:28
  Speaker 6: and this, this is probably the one, uh, you know
• 40:32
  Speaker 6: thing I had to say to him.
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: He was he was really.
• 40:36
  Speaker 6: A really good student in the classes where he liked
• 40:41
  Speaker 6: the subject matter, but more importantly respected the teacher. So
• 40:45
  Speaker 6: there's another formative relationship thing, right, So in the areas
• 40:49
  Speaker 6: that he respected the teacher, he would work his tail off.
• 40:54
  Speaker 6: But but that wasn't you know, to have a dream
• 40:57
  Speaker 6: team across the board wasn't exactly what had in some cases,
• 41:01
  Speaker 6: and where he wasn't engaged, he didn't do very well.
• 41:04
  Speaker 6: And I had to say to him, you know, you're
• 41:06
  Speaker 6: gonna apply to colleges here next year, and if you don't,
• 41:10
  Speaker 6: you know, get into some of the ones that you
• 41:12
  Speaker 6: want to get into, it's gonna be because of this.
• 41:16
  Speaker 6: And he understood he understood that, and you know, I
• 41:19
  Speaker 6: also we also had a conversation about homework at one point,
• 41:22
  Speaker 6: because I'm not sure Patrick did a whole lot of homework,
• 41:26
  Speaker 6: but I I did say to him, homework, Uh, you know,
• 41:31
  Speaker 6: it's part of school. You do it, you don't do it,
• 41:33
  Speaker 6: but it's gonna it's gonna impact your grade. And he
• 41:36
  Speaker 6: knew that and have made his choices, and you know,
• 41:38
  Speaker 6: I guess it turned out pretty well. So he you know,
• 41:41
  Speaker 6: he was early on about relationships, and uh, certainly with
• 41:46
  Speaker 6: the teachers that I think he goes out and emulates
• 41:50
  Speaker 6: to this day were people that he really felt a
• 41:54
  Speaker 6: connection to and thought a relationship with.
• 41:56
  Speaker 3: Yeah, was here a point where he's to you dat
• 42:01
  Speaker 3: I'm seriously considering becoming a professional rap artist, or was
• 42:07
  Speaker 3: there a point at any point where you were afraid
• 42:11
  Speaker 3: that he was going to say that to you?
• 42:15
  Speaker 6: I think if if things had worked out for Patrick,
• 42:19
  Speaker 6: he would have loved to have been a professional rap artist.
• 42:22
  Speaker 2: And he certainly has dabbled in music. It was an
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: early passion of his.
• 42:29
  Speaker 6: To this day, you know, he knows more about so
• 42:33
  Speaker 6: many different genres of music than you know most people
• 42:37
  Speaker 6: have forgotten, and so that's that's a passion of his.
• 42:41
  Speaker 2: As far as being a rapper, you know, his mother
• 42:43
  Speaker 2: and I would have been very pleased with that.
• 42:46
  Speaker 6: I often joked that none of our kids are teachers,
• 42:50
  Speaker 6: but Patrick figured out a way to be a teacher
• 42:52
  Speaker 6: without having to do all that day to day school stuff.
• 42:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, he did, and he's having huge impact, huge.
• 43:02
  Speaker 2: Impact, and we're awful proud of that.
• 43:05
  Speaker 3: Yeah, pleasure having you on this morning, Mark of course, listen.
• 43:10
  Speaker 3: Uh And And I've said this to Tom so many times,
• 43:13
  Speaker 3: and I say this all the time. I really at
• 43:17
  Speaker 3: some point I would love to meet all of you guys.
• 43:21
  Speaker 3: I don't know how, I don't aware, but I'd love
• 43:24
  Speaker 3: to run over to Saratoga and maybe sit down in
• 43:28
  Speaker 3: a circle and share some coffee with you one of
• 43:30
  Speaker 3: one of these days, I'm gonna I'm gonna do it.
• 43:33
  Speaker 6: Well in April second, my calendar gets freed up except
• 43:37
  Speaker 6: for Grandpa duty, so you know, I'm in.
• 43:39
  Speaker 3: Let me know, thank you, my friend so much.
• 43:43
  Speaker 2: We'll get We'll get Tom and Rick Dibay.
• 43:45
  Speaker 3: Yeah, of course we will. Of course we will. Thank
• 43:48
  Speaker 3: you so much.
• 43:48
  Speaker 2: Mark, of course, thank you. It's fun.
• 43:51
  Speaker 3: Kudos to you. Yeah, man, you're doing great, great work,
• 43:54
  Speaker 3: and everything you're you're doing as a dad is huge too. Still,
• 44:00
  Speaker 3: you're always going to be a dad. But I just
• 44:03
  Speaker 3: love having conversations like this on the air, I really do.
• 44:07
  Speaker 3: It's so important, and frankly, we should be having more
• 44:10
  Speaker 3: conversations like this. No matter if you're a parent, if
• 44:15
  Speaker 3: you're an administrator, if you're a superintendent, if you're a janitor,
• 44:19
  Speaker 3: if you're the lunch person, doesn't matter. All of this
• 44:26
  Speaker 3: stuff is super super important. Thanks for tuning in this morning.
• 44:33
  Speaker 3: I hope that you're dealing with these I'm not going
• 44:36
  Speaker 3: to say cold, I won't say that word. I'll say
• 44:39
  Speaker 3: cool temperatures. They're not going to be here too much longer.
• 44:44
  Speaker 3: We're rebounding tomorrow at least for a week or so
• 44:51
  Speaker 3: and then maybe back into the thirties, So just keep
• 44:56
  Speaker 3: that in mind. Got the uh the usage this morning.
• 45:04
  Speaker 2: That that.
• 45:07
  Speaker 3: Berlin Street in Montpellier reopened to all traffic, So if
• 45:11
  Speaker 3: you have plans to move through that area today, you
• 45:14
  Speaker 3: should be good to go. All right, Listen, be careful
• 45:16
  Speaker 3: today driving no matter where you're going. Get through your day.
• 45:23
  Speaker 3: It's a Wednesday, it's hump day when We're celebrating it
• 45:27
  Speaker 3: together with sweethearts and heroes every single Wednesday, right here
• 45:30
  Speaker 3: on the aired out podcast God Blessed. We'll see you
• 45:32
  Speaker 3: soon tomorrow morning, right here where you are now, aired
• 45:36
  Speaker 3: out
• 46:09
  Speaker 1: At jack