Latest / bit of a Rambler / 164 Dream Big Enough

Transcript

164 Dream Big Enough · bit of a Rambler

0:00
Speaker 1: Hello, my name is Kai, and I am a bit
0:02
Speaker 1: of a rambler. I like to travel, learn, and tell stories.
0:06
Speaker 1: I've got another fun quote today for me. I hope
0:08
Speaker 1: you enjoy listening to it as well. May your future
0:11
Speaker 1: be limited only by your dreams. Now, quotes are quotes
0:14
Speaker 1: because they're memorable, they're cliche, they sound cheesy, like this
0:18
Speaker 1: guy does, but it's true. That's a sentiment I share,
0:22
Speaker 1: especially since I started traveling, and even more, particularly, after
0:28
Speaker 1: I retired, basically, and... encourage people to do the same,
0:33
Speaker 1: to travel and live in a low cost of living
0:36
Speaker 1: countries so they don't have to work. Because that's what
0:39
Speaker 1: people usually complain to me about, that they don't have
0:41
Speaker 1: any time to themselves and they're working. And their dream
0:44
Speaker 1: is to travel. What's really interesting is if I'm speaking
0:47
Speaker 1: English with like an English speaker, then they talk about
0:51
Speaker 1: how they want to do something. But if I'm talking
0:55
Speaker 1: with Chinese people, I often, I hear the word dream.
0:59
Speaker 1: My dream is to travel. My dream is to own
1:03
Speaker 1: my own business. My dream is to... They use that word,
1:06
Speaker 1: so that kind of stuck out with me when I
1:09
Speaker 1: read this quote and made me want to talk about it.
1:12
Speaker 1: When English speakers hear the word dream, it sounds like
1:14
Speaker 1: this lofty, almost like a vision, like a calling, like
1:18
Speaker 1: a universal fate told you that this is what you
1:23
Speaker 1: must do to follow your dream. This is how your
1:27
Speaker 1: destiny unfolds. And that's not what a dream should be.
1:31
Speaker 1: And that's not how Chinese people treat dreams. They use
1:34
Speaker 1: that word the same as like realistic hope or attainable goal,
1:40
Speaker 1: which I think is really interesting because English speakers do
1:43
Speaker 1: not use dream. I feel like when we use the
1:47
Speaker 1: word dream, we're talking about something that could potentially happen.
1:51
Speaker 1: I dream I won the lottery. Like we think about
1:54
Speaker 1: it as an actual dream, this thing. That maybe it
1:57
Speaker 1: could happen, perhaps, but probably not. Whereas Chinese people, when
2:02
Speaker 1: I talk to them, are, yeah, my dream is, it is,
2:05
Speaker 1: it's a concrete, my dream is to own my own business.
2:08
Speaker 1: And then they work toward owning their own business. My
2:11
Speaker 1: dream is to learn Spanish. And then they start learning Spanish.
2:16
Speaker 1: I feel this quote when I talk to people in
2:21
Speaker 1: terms of, I want you to do what you want
2:23
Speaker 1: to do. May your future be limited only by your dreams.
2:26
Speaker 1: And I think dreams can be practical. I like approaching
2:30
Speaker 1: and perceiving dreams in the Chinese way and the Cambodian way.
2:34
Speaker 1: A lot of Asian languages seem to use the word dream.
2:38
Speaker 1: Maybe it's just the word in the textbooks. But using
2:40
Speaker 1: the word dream in a practical nature makes more sense
2:43
Speaker 1: to me because when people ask me about my life
2:47
Speaker 1: and what I do and how I travel... Even other
2:51
Speaker 1: travelers will sometimes say that they wish they could do that.
2:54
Speaker 1: Like short-term travelers say, yeah, I wish I could travel
2:57
Speaker 1: all the time, just like how you're describing. Or it
3:00
Speaker 1: sounds like a dream and all this kind of stuff.
3:02
Speaker 1: And it's not. It's a regular life. I sleep on
3:05
Speaker 1: sofas at friends' houses when I visit them. And I
3:08
Speaker 1: don't know, sometimes my neighbor is too loud when I
3:12
Speaker 1: own my own condo in Peru. I'm like, hey, neighbor,
3:15
Speaker 1: be quiet. But Especially for travelers, I always tell them,
3:18
Speaker 1: you don't have to dream, it's simply a matter of
3:21
Speaker 1: low cost and paying that low cost versus a high
3:24
Speaker 1: cost of living. The benefits you're enjoying on a short
3:27
Speaker 1: term by visiting Thailand for a week you could do
3:30
Speaker 1: for a long term by getting a visa and living
3:32
Speaker 1: in Thailand for a year or years. It is pretty
3:35
Speaker 1: nice overall, and especially just my particular style of living
3:41
Speaker 1: is incredibly attainable for so many people. It is not...
3:46
Speaker 1: what I grew up thinking of as a dream. It's
3:49
Speaker 1: a reality. Airline tickets are this much. The cost of
3:52
Speaker 1: living in each country is this much percentage cheaper than
3:56
Speaker 1: the country I am from. So for me, it's sticks
3:59
Speaker 1: and stones, fundamental building blocks of reality. My apartment in
4:04
Speaker 1: the U.S. is $ 1, 600. My apartment in China is $ 120
4:07
Speaker 1: per month for each. That's just how much things cost
4:14
Speaker 1: in the world right now, and that's accessible to everybody
4:17
Speaker 1: who can fly. You don't have to go to China.
4:20
Speaker 1: There are plenty of Central American places that are close.
4:23
Speaker 1: I was just in Panama a couple few years ago,
4:27
Speaker 1: and it was $ 240, I think, per month for a
4:31
Speaker 1: private room, maid service. It was shared bathrooms because that's
4:35
Speaker 1: a common Panama thing. They're like, what do they call them?
4:38
Speaker 1: It's some kind of like shared... Housing, I can't remember
4:41
Speaker 1: the Spanish term for it, but you share the cost
4:43
Speaker 1: of the building, so rent is way cheaper. And then
4:46
Speaker 1: you have like two or three shower stalls and toilet
4:50
Speaker 1: in one shared bathroom at the end of the hall.
4:52
Speaker 1: You don't have to live like that. But if you do,
4:54
Speaker 1: it's very cheap. And Panama is a beautiful and modern country.
4:59
Speaker 1: So whenever somebody asks me how they can travel or
5:01
Speaker 1: if they can travel, especially in real life, I'm just like, oh, yeah,
5:05
Speaker 1: you can. I've never had to say no to anyone
5:08
Speaker 1: so far. I've definitely had to say, oh, it'll be
5:10
Speaker 1: more difficult, but yes. I was talking to my U.S.
5:14
Speaker 1: American friend the other day, and she wants to travel,
5:18
Speaker 1: and she has for a while, but she always talks
5:22
Speaker 1: herself out of it. And she wants to go on
5:25
Speaker 1: a cruise to start off. That would be fun. You know,
5:28
Speaker 1: they're pretty short generally. You can get a four-day cruise,
5:31
Speaker 1: and she could see a couple countries. And then she
5:33
Speaker 1: was like, but what if I can't get off the boat? Like,
5:36
Speaker 1: what do you mean? What if they don't let me
5:38
Speaker 1: off the boat? will they let me off the boat?
5:40
Speaker 1: And I was like, yeah, they'll let you off the boat.
5:43
Speaker 1: Of course they'll let you off the boat. It's like,
5:45
Speaker 1: if you go to a hotel, you can leave the hotel.
5:48
Speaker 1: You're not barricaded in. And she was like, yeah, but
5:50
Speaker 1: what if I want to, anytime I can just leave
5:53
Speaker 1: the boat anytime I want to. And I was like, well,
5:55
Speaker 1: it'll be more difficult if you're on the ocean. Like
5:58
Speaker 1: if you're in the middle of the ocean, it will
6:00
Speaker 1: be more difficult than the next day when the boat
6:02
Speaker 1: docks in a port and you can just walk off.
6:05
Speaker 1: She's like, see, I can't even leave the boat. I
6:07
Speaker 1: was like, No, no, you can leave the boat. It's
6:10
Speaker 1: just you'll have to wait till you're at a port
6:12
Speaker 1: or you can get helicoptered off, but that'll be more expensive.
6:16
Speaker 1: But she just said again, so I can't get off.
6:18
Speaker 1: And at that moment, right then decided she wasn't going
6:21
Speaker 1: to take a cruise after all and start traveling. And
6:24
Speaker 1: like so many people with the means and interest to
6:28
Speaker 1: achieve their dream, she limits herself. She's not going to
6:32
Speaker 1: go on that cruise again. Because she's afraid they won't
6:36
Speaker 1: let her off in the middle of the ocean and
6:38
Speaker 1: she'll have to pay more for a helicopter ride to
6:41
Speaker 1: leave a four-day cruise. In the middle of the cruise,
6:44
Speaker 1: on one of the only times she's not at port.
6:47
Speaker 1: It's so wild talking to my U.S. American friends about traveling.
6:54
Speaker 1: The perspective on traveling there is so different. Even people
6:59
Speaker 1: that travel from the U.S. usually have a whole itinerary
7:02
Speaker 1: set for them. I guess that's true of most countries.
7:04
Speaker 1: But people who haven't traveled in the U.S., which is
7:07
Speaker 1: a lot of U.S. Americans, when I get back here,
7:10
Speaker 1: it's always necessary to remember to take a step back
7:14
Speaker 1: and pretend I had never traveled at all and say
7:18
Speaker 1: things like, yeah, the wings on planes are very sturdily attached.
7:23
Speaker 1: They don't fall off during the flight. Or, yeah, they
7:27
Speaker 1: have cars in Cambodia. In fact, their national transportation system
7:31
Speaker 1: is a bit more advanced than the U.S. It's so
7:34
Speaker 1: easy to talk ourselves. I do this all the time.
7:38
Speaker 1: I do exactly what I just talked about my friend
7:40
Speaker 1: doing about the cruise ship. I find... excuses not to
7:44
Speaker 1: do things I haven't done yet because it's out of
7:47
Speaker 1: my routine. That's really the bottom line. I make the
7:50
Speaker 1: excuses for myself of that might cost too much money
7:54
Speaker 1: or that might be too much of a time investment.
7:57
Speaker 1: It might be too difficult to do that. I don't
7:58
Speaker 1: have the necessary skills. But especially as a traveler, I
8:03
Speaker 1: have all the time and all the practical money I
8:06
Speaker 1: need to pick up most skills in the world and
8:09
Speaker 1: visit most of the places I want to visit and
8:11
Speaker 1: do most of the things I want to do. I
8:13
Speaker 1: don't have those limits, but my brain automatically, I think
8:17
Speaker 1: humans are a conservative species, tells me, like, stay in
8:20
Speaker 1: this routine. Even if my routine is globetrotting and practicing
8:25
Speaker 1: new skills, like, once a month, make sure to learn
8:28
Speaker 1: something new. Languages. Languages is a perfect example. I learn
8:33
Speaker 1: many languages. Every time I go to a country, I
8:35
Speaker 1: like to learn the local language. I'm pretty good at Mandarin.
8:39
Speaker 1: I like some of the writing. I'm okay at Japanese,
8:42
Speaker 1: pretty terrible, but okay as of the last trip. Spanish,
8:45
Speaker 1: I got pretty well feeling at. I was okay speaking
8:49
Speaker 1: Spanish with a lot of the locals and had some
8:51
Speaker 1: nice longer conversations. But when I pick up German, which
8:56
Speaker 1: I know is easier because it's so similar to English,
9:01
Speaker 1: my brain is like, no, no, don't pick that up. Remember?
9:03
Speaker 1: Just study Chinese. You're good at Chinese. Don't worry about German.
9:07
Speaker 1: Don't worry. Anything new, anything outside of the routine, even
9:10
Speaker 1: my routine is outside of most other people's, outside of
9:14
Speaker 1: a monolingual's routine, I speak other languages, my brain is
9:17
Speaker 1: still like, nah, stay in that routine. That's why I
9:20
Speaker 1: make the effort to do something different as often as possible,
9:25
Speaker 1: because I know how easy it is for any mind
9:28
Speaker 1: to retreat into itself and be comfortable in the fishbowl
9:32
Speaker 1: it is inside, and not to expand that world at all.
9:35
Speaker 1: But if I want to learn welding now, today, I'm
9:38
Speaker 1: so much more comfortable thinking about learning welding than I
9:42
Speaker 1: would have even 10 years ago. It is a practical,
9:47
Speaker 1: that's simply a route. If I took some classes and
9:51
Speaker 1: I got some equipment, I'm certain I could become a
9:54
Speaker 1: fine welder. If I wanted to do stocks, I traded
9:57
Speaker 1: some stocks just to see how I would like it.
10:00
Speaker 1: I did well in them, and I don't like it
10:02
Speaker 1: at all. It's a lot of time, and all you
10:06
Speaker 1: get is money. But you have to watch the stocks constantly.
10:10
Speaker 1: You have to watch market trends, and you have to
10:12
Speaker 1: care about monolithic corporations that don't mean anything to my
10:17
Speaker 1: personal life. And The cost of living is so low
10:21
Speaker 1: for a traveler. I guess, yeah, if I have an
10:24
Speaker 1: extra $ 10, 000 because I bought something and then the next
10:27
Speaker 1: year I did really well and I got lucky and
10:29
Speaker 1: I got 10,000 extra bucks, that's great. I can't really
10:34
Speaker 1: use that for more than I am now. I could
10:36
Speaker 1: get a bigger house to myself, but travelers already get
10:40
Speaker 1: their own places. You could get a private... I could
10:43
Speaker 1: get a private house set apart from the city that
10:46
Speaker 1: was like my own private land. But then I got
10:50
Speaker 1: to get transportation into the city or then I got
10:53
Speaker 1: to get transportation from my secluded house to somewhere else,
10:57
Speaker 1: which if you want to do that, that's fine. But
10:59
Speaker 1: you don't need to spend so much time trading stocks
11:02
Speaker 1: to get money to do that. You can just move
11:04
Speaker 1: to a low cost of living country and buy a
11:06
Speaker 1: house for 10 or 20 grand. I don't have 10
11:09
Speaker 1: or 20 grand. You speak English, then teach for a
11:11
Speaker 1: year and you'll have 10 or 20 grand to buy
11:13
Speaker 1: a house with. My dreams are still limited. I know that.
11:17
Speaker 1: I know I still limit myself by not viewing the
11:20
Speaker 1: world as practically as it should be viewed. And I
11:24
Speaker 1: do think part of that is just human nature. I
11:26
Speaker 1: think it's routine. I think routine is comfortable. And no
11:30
Speaker 1: matter how much empirical evidence I have that trying something
11:33
Speaker 1: new works out, as long as I put some effort
11:37
Speaker 1: and invest time into it, it's so easy to come
11:41
Speaker 1: to the conclusion that I can't do something for one
11:44
Speaker 1: reason or another. Even simple things like hanging out with
11:47
Speaker 1: a group of people or going to a party, it's
11:50
Speaker 1: so easy to talk myself out of that instead of
11:53
Speaker 1: just going and seeing if it's fun. No one's gonna,
11:57
Speaker 1: if I go there and don't like it, I can leave.
12:00
Speaker 1: It's even easier than leaving a cruise ship. You can
12:02
Speaker 1: just walk out the door, say goodbye, thank you, and
12:06
Speaker 1: then go. It's, you don't have to do the things
12:09
Speaker 1: you don't want to do, especially as a traveler where
12:12
Speaker 1: you aren't constrained by financial burdens as much. Things are
12:16
Speaker 1: way cheaper, so you don't have to live as the
12:19
Speaker 1: roommate to someone you don't want to live with. It's
12:22
Speaker 1: the exact same price if you're living with someone you
12:24
Speaker 1: don't want to live with, or you live with someone
12:26
Speaker 1: you do want to live with. In most countries, and
12:28
Speaker 1: if it's not moved to the country where that is possible,
12:31
Speaker 1: it's a short plane ride away, and you can live
12:34
Speaker 1: by yourself, or you can live in a better hostel.
12:36
Speaker 1: You can just walk across the city to another hostel.
12:39
Speaker 1: I aim for this quote. May your future be limited
12:43
Speaker 1: only by your dreams. I aim for that. I want
12:45
Speaker 1: to want to do something and then go do it.
12:49
Speaker 1: And I'm getting better at that for sure. I do
12:52
Speaker 1: that a lot. At this point, I feel like I'm
12:54
Speaker 1: kind of on that track. I think of Canada and
12:58
Speaker 1: then I go fly to Canada and I take a
13:01
Speaker 1: train somewhere and it's fun. And I am lucky that
13:05
Speaker 1: I found traveling first because that makes it so much
13:09
Speaker 1: easier to attain my dreams. Traveling, I have much more time,
13:14
Speaker 1: way more free money. I have the availability to do
13:18
Speaker 1: what I want most of the time. And that's why
13:21
Speaker 1: I talk about traveling with people. That's why when people
13:24
Speaker 1: ask me if they can travel, I give this same
13:27
Speaker 1: spiel or, you know, a tangential related spiel to how
13:32
Speaker 1: I began traveling and how they can travel. Because I
13:35
Speaker 1: want people to understand that their dreams are not limited
13:41
Speaker 1: by the practical matters they're concerned with. Most people that
13:45
Speaker 1: talk to me about this are English speakers. And so
13:47
Speaker 1: they're always concerned about their job and how much money
13:51
Speaker 1: it costs to travel. And that's the easiest thing to
13:55
Speaker 1: do away with right away. The cost of living is
13:58
Speaker 1: 90% lower in 100 countries. Go live in one of
14:01
Speaker 1: those countries. If you're speaking English to me, then you
14:04
Speaker 1: have a guaranteed job. There are 1.5 billion people looking
14:07
Speaker 1: for an English teacher. So if your dream is to travel,
14:10
Speaker 1: your dream is not being limited by... practical survival matters.
14:15
Speaker 1: It is probably being limited by you being uncomfortable with
14:19
Speaker 1: doing something you haven't done before, which is incredibly valid.
14:23
Speaker 1: And as I said, I still do it today, even
14:25
Speaker 1: though I'm traveling. If I see someone, I don't know,
14:28
Speaker 1: practicing a skill painting, if I see someone painting and
14:31
Speaker 1: they paint and it looks amazing, I still to this day,
14:34
Speaker 1: I'm like, wow, that is amazing. And my brain is like,
14:37
Speaker 1: you can't do that. And I'm like, yeah, I know brain,
14:40
Speaker 1: but I bet my brain is wrong. I bet if
14:42
Speaker 1: I just paint for fun, however I like to paint,
14:46
Speaker 1: it'll be fine and I'll feel better and I'll enjoy
14:48
Speaker 1: my paintings. Or being captivated by a dance I see
14:52
Speaker 1: in some musical movie or a dance troupe. I'll see
14:56
Speaker 1: them dancing and I'll be like, that is amazing and unattainable.
14:59
Speaker 1: But it is attainable. If I just danced, I would
15:03
Speaker 1: be a dancer. It's the fundamentals. Do it and you
15:07
Speaker 1: are doing it. I'm really pushing my brain to just
15:10
Speaker 1: look at the world through that has helped me do
15:12
Speaker 1: so much in this life. I like hiking, and when
15:17
Speaker 1: I was in China, there were a bunch of tour buses,
15:22
Speaker 1: and everyone in China was telling me the best tours
15:25
Speaker 1: to take and the best buses, the best routes, and
15:28
Speaker 1: the best sites. And what I was thinking to myself was, man,
15:31
Speaker 1: I wish I could just go by myself and go
15:35
Speaker 1: to these mountains and... be able to take them in
15:38
Speaker 1: without other people on my tour bus or like other
15:43
Speaker 1: groups of people muddying my experience. And at first I
15:47
Speaker 1: read between the paragraphs and they would mention like, of
15:51
Speaker 1: course everyone goes to Ba Da Ling and there are
15:53
Speaker 1: other great wall sites of the Great Wall you can visit,
15:56
Speaker 1: but nobody really goes there. And then they would go
15:59
Speaker 1: on to explain, you know, pages of the more popular sites,
16:02
Speaker 1: and I'd be like, wait a minute, what is that
16:04
Speaker 1: place they said nobody goes to? So in the beginning,
16:06
Speaker 1: I took buses and trains with other people to those areas,
16:11
Speaker 1: and I would go to those places, and I'd be like, hey,
16:14
Speaker 1: this is more what I want, and all I had
16:17
Speaker 1: to do was try to get here, and there wasn't
16:21
Speaker 1: instructions like there are for the main tourist places. If
16:23
Speaker 1: you want to go to Badaling or any of the
16:25
Speaker 1: popular Great Wall-like sites in China, there's gonna, there are
16:30
Speaker 1: countless websites and instruction manuals of exactly what bus to take,
16:34
Speaker 1: where to go, all this kind of stuff. If you
16:36
Speaker 1: want to go to one of the less popular sites,
16:38
Speaker 1: where there's going to be 1% of the, literally 1%
16:42
Speaker 1: of the amount of people at maximum, there's no instructions
16:45
Speaker 1: anywhere on how to get there. But it's China. People
16:48
Speaker 1: go places, there are buses that go there. There are,
16:52
Speaker 1: if you search online for a guy for a specific place,
16:56
Speaker 1: you might get lucky. But if you don't, What I
16:58
Speaker 1: did was I talked to people, I talked to bus drivers,
17:02
Speaker 1: and I said, I want to go to this place
17:04
Speaker 1: on the Great Wall. Do you go there? He said, yeah,
17:06
Speaker 1: I'll go there, and then you switch the bus. So
17:09
Speaker 1: I'd get on the bus, ride for an hour, and
17:11
Speaker 1: then the next bus driver would show up, and he'd
17:12
Speaker 1: be like, do you go here? Nope. Do you go here? Yes.
17:15
Speaker 1: And then I'd get to that place, and there would
17:17
Speaker 1: be almost nobody else on this section of the wall,
17:21
Speaker 1: frequently nobody else. As soon as you're 100 yards away
17:25
Speaker 1: from the entry gate, nobody walks that far. So you
17:28
Speaker 1: can just have the Great Wall to yourself, which was
17:31
Speaker 1: my dream. And it was limited by my understanding of
17:35
Speaker 1: what the future could be, how much I could achieve.
17:38
Speaker 1: I had to think just a little bigger. I had
17:40
Speaker 1: to read the travel guide and then think, it isn't
17:44
Speaker 1: written in here how to do something, but I bet
17:47
Speaker 1: there's a way to do it. And it's just not
17:50
Speaker 1: written down instead of if it isn't written down in here,
17:53
Speaker 1: then I can't do it. That's a real easy way
17:56
Speaker 1: that I limited my dreams for a long time. So
17:58
Speaker 1: I started doing that. I would take I would look
18:00
Speaker 1: for the things that weren't mentioned. Actually, I was in
18:03
Speaker 1: Beijing and I had a friend in Tianjin, 100 kilometers away,
18:06
Speaker 1: and I had a bicycle. And I thought, what if
18:08
Speaker 1: I just ride my bicycle to go see my friend
18:11
Speaker 1: and then ride back the next day or a couple
18:13
Speaker 1: of days later? Just like a fun trip for a
18:15
Speaker 1: couple of days. And everyone told me, you can't do it.
18:18
Speaker 1: It's too far. You can just take the bus. But
18:22
Speaker 1: in my head, remembering these fundamentals that have worked out
18:25
Speaker 1: of just doing something and then it working out, I
18:29
Speaker 1: just thought, well, if I ride, then it'll be less
18:31
Speaker 1: far away and then less far. And if I continue
18:34
Speaker 1: to ride my bicycle, I will arrive. It's really just
18:37
Speaker 1: if I continue to pedal, I will get that 100 kilometers.
18:41
Speaker 1: And so one weekend I did that. I rode my
18:43
Speaker 1: bicycle for 10 hours or whatever it was and made
18:47
Speaker 1: it 100 kilometers to Tianjin. And then a couple days later,
18:51
Speaker 1: I bicycled on back. Actually, I think I had to
18:53
Speaker 1: bicycle back like later that afternoon because it took longer
18:56
Speaker 1: than I thought. And I had to teach on Monday.
18:58
Speaker 1: But I did. I pedaled back and I pedaled all
19:01
Speaker 1: the way back to Beijing. And it was really fun.
19:03
Speaker 1: And I met a bunch of interesting people. And it
19:05
Speaker 1: was a great little adventure. And instead of preparing or
19:10
Speaker 1: looking up and researching too much... I started pedaling east
19:15
Speaker 1: because it's 100 kilometers. It's not that far. There are
19:17
Speaker 1: major hubs. I knew there were towns. I wasn't going
19:19
Speaker 1: to be lost in a desert. There was food everywhere,
19:22
Speaker 1: water everywhere, bicycle repair shops at every other town. So
19:28
Speaker 1: I just had to start pedaling and then I would
19:30
Speaker 1: get to where I wanted to go, where I dreamed
19:33
Speaker 1: of going. And I did. When I visited Thailand, I
19:36
Speaker 1: started going to cities that were not mentioned. I would
19:41
Speaker 1: go to the transportation hubs that had buses leaving every hour,
19:49
Speaker 1: and I would just ask them. what's the next one
19:50
Speaker 1: leaving that goes to this area? And they'd be like,
19:53
Speaker 1: they'd say something in Thai, and I wouldn't even understand
19:56
Speaker 1: what the city was, but I could see it written down.
19:58
Speaker 1: That was the city. I'd look at it on Google
20:00
Speaker 1: or on the map they had. They usually have maps
20:03
Speaker 1: written on the windows there and be like, yeah, sounds good,
20:05
Speaker 1: because I had traveled to a They all have the
20:11
Speaker 1: same great food and great people and infrastructure and malls
20:16
Speaker 1: and supermarkets. Everything's there. So I would just get on
20:20
Speaker 1: a bus and go to a random city because I
20:23
Speaker 1: didn't want my future to be limited by my dreams.
20:26
Speaker 1: I don't want my future to be limited by my
20:28
Speaker 1: understanding of what my dreams could be. So if I
20:31
Speaker 1: looked up any city in Thailand, there's a huge country,
20:34
Speaker 1: by the way. A lot of people think Thailand is
20:36
Speaker 1: tiny when I talk to them, but it's a It's
20:39
Speaker 1: a big country. So there are so many places to
20:41
Speaker 1: visit and there are plenty of popular cities that you
20:44
Speaker 1: can read all about and get a ton of great
20:47
Speaker 1: guidance for. And those cities can be great. No doubt.
20:49
Speaker 1: They can be a lot of fun. But I did
20:51
Speaker 1: get the impression after traveling to the cities that when
20:54
Speaker 1: I went to them, there was an expectation of me
20:57
Speaker 1: as a traveler of what I would do there as
20:58
Speaker 1: a tourist. It was there. It was set in the cobblestones.
21:02
Speaker 1: It was all ready to go. And I didn't want...
21:08
Speaker 1: to have to hit all the ten spaces listed that
21:12
Speaker 1: are the best parts of Krabi, I guess. I wanted
21:16
Speaker 1: to explore stuff on my own, and even reading it,
21:19
Speaker 1: I could do whatever I wanted to in a Thai
21:21
Speaker 1: city and not follow those lists, and I do that also,
21:24
Speaker 1: but it's so easy to have a framework, and because
21:28
Speaker 1: of that framework, I'm not paying attention to everything between
21:32
Speaker 1: that framework, which is most of the city. The framework,
21:36
Speaker 1: that list, or the thing that the must sees, it's
21:39
Speaker 1: so easy to have that framework of sticks making the
21:45
Speaker 1: image of the city. And then you're missing everything between
21:47
Speaker 1: those sticks, like the whole city. So I love walking
21:52
Speaker 1: around because then my dreams are kind of, my dreams
21:55
Speaker 1: are much more, what is around the next corner? Am
21:58
Speaker 1: I going to find that great market with like super
22:00
Speaker 1: fresh mango again? Is there going to be a private beach?
22:03
Speaker 1: Am I going to turn into a rose garden? Am
22:06
Speaker 1: I going to Turn the corner and it'll be like
22:09
Speaker 1: a mega mall that I had no idea was in
22:10
Speaker 1: the middle of this tropical island. Will there be a
22:13
Speaker 1: dude selling handmade ice cream? I have no idea. I
22:16
Speaker 1: really liked that my dreams didn't have a limit. That
22:20
Speaker 1: was kind of a shortcut to that. I didn't have
22:23
Speaker 1: to listen to the limitations of my mind. Okay, I'll
22:25
Speaker 1: go to that great temple and then I can figure
22:28
Speaker 1: out da-da-da-da. If I didn't have anything set, then I
22:32
Speaker 1: couldn't be limited there. by my own dreams, because my
22:36
Speaker 1: dreams were infinite. It was always something around the next corner,
22:40
Speaker 1: and it still is. Absolutely, the next time when I
22:44
Speaker 1: do something, it's because I'm interested in what is going
22:47
Speaker 1: to happen. And it's incredibly useful to know exactly what
22:50
Speaker 1: you're going for, but at this point, since I pedaled
22:54
Speaker 1: until I made it 100 kilometers, or I just started
22:57
Speaker 1: walking out from one city until I reached the other city,
23:02
Speaker 1: it makes a lot of sense to me I know
23:04
Speaker 1: that it's just a practical thing I can achieve if
23:06
Speaker 1: I take the step forward and start going toward it.
23:09
Speaker 1: I just have to take some kind of action and
23:11
Speaker 1: intentionally move toward my dream. So dream amorphously or dream concretely,
23:17
Speaker 1: but move towards those dreams. That's how you can create
23:20
Speaker 1: the future you're going for. You have to take action
23:23
Speaker 1: and move toward your dreams. That's how I created mine, anyway.
23:26
Speaker 1: Concrete steps. And also getting lucky on Craigslist and trying
23:30
Speaker 1: to buy a controller and then getting a job and
23:32
Speaker 1: But it was an opportunity, and I thought that could
23:35
Speaker 1: make this, my life, a little bit better. And so
23:38
Speaker 1: I moved toward that. Got my passport, went to another country.
23:42
Speaker 1: After that, I was like, well, traveling is definitely going
23:44
Speaker 1: to make it better. I should travel to more places.
23:46
Speaker 1: And I booked tickets. May your future be limited only
23:49
Speaker 1: by your dreams. Dream big. Just do it. There's a
23:52
Speaker 1: lot of good slogans that are cliche, and they're true.
23:55
Speaker 1: I love just do it. It's so difficult for me
23:59
Speaker 1: not to say just do it. One of the best
24:01
Speaker 1: parts of traveling is I can say, just do it
24:03
Speaker 1: to people from other countries, and they don't instinctively think
24:07
Speaker 1: of that as a Nike slogan. It means something to them.
24:10
Speaker 1: They're like, yeah, I guess I could just do it.
24:12
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, yeah, go do that thing you want
24:14
Speaker 1: to do. Go study Spanish. Go get your business degree.
24:18
Speaker 1: Once you start doing it, you are doing it. Once
24:22
Speaker 1: you begin the process, you are that thing. Once you
24:25
Speaker 1: begin painting, you are a painter. And I tell myself
24:28
Speaker 1: that all the time. I think it's very helpful. to
24:31
Speaker 1: actively pursue my dreams. I want to do a cruise ship.
24:35
Speaker 1: I haven't done one yet. I've been looking into them
24:38
Speaker 1: a lot lately. They seem very interesting. I will be
24:40
Speaker 1: on a cruise ship soon. I know that because I
24:44
Speaker 1: want to do it. And it's a bit daunting because
24:46
Speaker 1: I haven't been on one. They're expensive. I know nothing
24:51
Speaker 1: about them except, you know, the one side who are like,
24:53
Speaker 1: cruise ships are destroying the world and all the food
24:57
Speaker 1: is crappy and all that kind of stuff. And then
24:59
Speaker 1: the other side of YouTube people who are like, cruise
25:02
Speaker 1: ships are my life and everything is wonderful on a
25:05
Speaker 1: cruise ship. And then there are a bunch of great
25:07
Speaker 1: informational videos that show both sides. But I want to
25:11
Speaker 1: go on one. I want to visit a few countries
25:13
Speaker 1: in a few days. That seems crazy. I've never done that.
25:15
Speaker 1: That doesn't seem particularly fun, but I love boats. I
25:18
Speaker 1: love the ocean. That sounds fun. I'll do that. So
25:21
Speaker 1: even though my brain is telling me to be conservative
25:25
Speaker 1: and don't pursue that dream that I haven't done before,
25:29
Speaker 1: I'm going to do it. I'm going to just put
25:31
Speaker 1: one foot in front of the other until my feet
25:34
Speaker 1: are both on a ship. And then I'll be on
25:36
Speaker 1: a ship. And that's how I do most of these things.
25:39
Speaker 1: The Great Wall example. Okay, so I started with taking
25:42
Speaker 1: buses to lesser known places. And then I got a
25:45
Speaker 1: bicycle and I looked around and I was looking at different,
25:49
Speaker 1: like my next mountain to go to. And then I
25:52
Speaker 1: looked at the bicycle in the corner of my room
25:54
Speaker 1: and I was like, oh, man, I guess I could
25:56
Speaker 1: I could physically if I just move my legs on
25:59
Speaker 1: that bicycle, the bicycle will arrive at the mountain I
26:03
Speaker 1: want to go to. And I don't have to be
26:04
Speaker 1: on a stinky bus with nobody. It's free. It's cheap, obviously,
26:09
Speaker 1: traveling in China, but it's free if I'm on my bicycle.
26:12
Speaker 1: And my brain was like, that's crazy. That is four
26:15
Speaker 1: hours one way. Like, what if you don't like the mountain?
26:18
Speaker 1: What if the gate is closed and you can't get in?
26:21
Speaker 1: What if their road is closed because of whatever the heck?
26:24
Speaker 1: But hey, I can jump gates and there are plenty
26:26
Speaker 1: of roads in China. And I put one foot in
26:29
Speaker 1: front of the other and roll them on those pedals.
26:31
Speaker 1: And I got to a mountain four hours away and
26:33
Speaker 1: I had my hammock with me. So I slept on
26:35
Speaker 1: the mountain. I climbed down. I slept in a hammock.
26:38
Speaker 1: I drank beers on the way. I ate my favorite
26:40
Speaker 1: foods on the way there at new restaurants every single day.
26:43
Speaker 1: And as soon as I was like an hour outside
26:44
Speaker 1: of Beijing, they were like, what are you doing here?
26:48
Speaker 1: People who look like you don't hang out in this
26:50
Speaker 1: part of the country, which is still true. I went
26:52
Speaker 1: to outside of Beijing just a little bit, not even
26:55
Speaker 1: outside of the city this time. Last time I was
26:57
Speaker 1: in China and it's still so all of the foreigners
27:01
Speaker 1: are in the middle of major cities. Nobody's still outside
27:04
Speaker 1: of the cities. So I think I'm going to go
27:06
Speaker 1: live in China for a little while because I kind
27:09
Speaker 1: of miss it and I have friends and I want
27:11
Speaker 1: to just live in a little little countryside town like
27:15
Speaker 1: I did before. Their little countryside towns are like larger
27:18
Speaker 1: than most US cities, which is super. But after I
27:21
Speaker 1: rode my bike to a mountain, that was the new
27:25
Speaker 1: limit of my dreams. And mountains are different. All the mountains,
27:29
Speaker 1: it was amazing. That's a great, I didn't feel like
27:31
Speaker 1: I was settling. Every time I went to dozens of
27:34
Speaker 1: mountains on my bicycle, I would just ride. I would
27:37
Speaker 1: look at a map and I'd be like eight hours. Okay,
27:39
Speaker 1: got it. And then I would just ride and I
27:41
Speaker 1: would just go there. And then I'd arrive and I'd
27:43
Speaker 1: be at a mountain and And no one else would
27:46
Speaker 1: be there, but there would be carved steps because it's China,
27:48
Speaker 1: so there's steps in all the mountains. And I'd climb
27:50
Speaker 1: that for a couple hours, and there'd be snacks and beer,
27:53
Speaker 1: and then I would go back down, ride back home,
27:56
Speaker 1: and it would be this amazing, cool little adventure that
27:59
Speaker 1: I had. And every time I chose a new mountain,
28:02
Speaker 1: it was my new dream. I was like, I want
28:05
Speaker 1: to see that mountain also. And I want to go
28:07
Speaker 1: there on my own terms, and I want to be
28:10
Speaker 1: in the fresh-ish air. Sometimes I was on a busy
28:12
Speaker 1: road riding my bike, and that was not as much fun, obviously.
28:16
Speaker 1: But sometimes I'd ride for three hours and it would
28:20
Speaker 1: be an almost empty road. It would just be me
28:22
Speaker 1: and there'd be fields all around. And amazing, amazing. China's
28:26
Speaker 1: so cool. I expanded the limits of my dreams. It's
28:31
Speaker 1: so easy to have your dream be something you already
28:33
Speaker 1: know or something you're comfortable with being unattainable, a dream
28:37
Speaker 1: you know that you're never going to try to reach.
28:40
Speaker 1: But I think it's very valuable for me to think
28:43
Speaker 1: of my dreams as something I don't even know about.
28:47
Speaker 1: I'd go to those mountains and just see what I had.
28:49
Speaker 1: And I would make friends on the mountains. And I
28:51
Speaker 1: would try food I had never tried before. When I
28:54
Speaker 1: went to Xi'an, that's the place where the forbidden, not
28:57
Speaker 1: the forbidden, the warriors, the clay warriors are. And I
29:02
Speaker 1: showed up in Xi'an and then I found out that's
29:03
Speaker 1: where my favorite sandwich, rojiamuo, it's like a pulled, it's
29:08
Speaker 1: like Chinese pulled pork, I guess you can think about it.
29:10
Speaker 1: which is like less barbecue sauce, more chili peppers, especially
29:13
Speaker 1: if you're in Xi'an, where the sandwich is from. But
29:17
Speaker 1: I found out that's where the sandwich is from. And look,
29:19
Speaker 1: the terracotta warriors were great, but this sandwich was delicious.
29:24
Speaker 1: And that's why I try not to be limited by
29:27
Speaker 1: what I already know, why I want my dreams to
29:31
Speaker 1: go as far as possible or be abstract, because I
29:35
Speaker 1: just want to go to a place and discover what
29:38
Speaker 1: is possible once I am there, once I am in
29:42
Speaker 1: that situation. My dreams have to be bigger than my
29:46
Speaker 1: thought processes, because my thought processes rely on being routine
29:52
Speaker 1: of some nature. They have to be by nature of
29:54
Speaker 1: being thought processes. They have to follow a path already
29:57
Speaker 1: laid by something I've thought before. My dream's have to
30:00
Speaker 1: be bigger than that. And I have to keep in
30:02
Speaker 1: mind that my dreams are realistically possible, that through simple
30:07
Speaker 1: action I can achieve those dreams. It's great to have
30:11
Speaker 1: a dream that you understand and you can pursue easily.
30:14
Speaker 1: I think small dreams and big dreams are equally useful.
30:17
Speaker 1: Have a small dream, know exactly what you want, and
30:19
Speaker 1: start acting, moving towards it, and accomplish it. Then, it's
30:23
Speaker 1: good if you don't fully understand your dream yet. It
30:26
Speaker 1: should be vague, I think, because then you allow the
30:30
Speaker 1: world you're in to fill in the blanks. If you
30:34
Speaker 1: go to Guatemala knowing exactly what you want when you
30:37
Speaker 1: get there, that's what your experience is going to be.
30:39
Speaker 1: When I went to Seoul, South Korea, I expected Seoul
30:44
Speaker 1: to be a crappy big city, and that's what it was,
30:47
Speaker 1: and I went there multiple times, and now I've been
30:49
Speaker 1: to Busan and Jeju, and I love South Korea, and
30:52
Speaker 1: I'm much more open and fluid in And even in Seoul,
30:57
Speaker 1: I found the Cartoon Animation Museum and the Animation Museum.
31:00
Speaker 1: Is it Cartoon Museum? Might be Cartoon Museum. It's amazing.
31:03
Speaker 1: So that was one thing that busted through my false
31:07
Speaker 1: sense of reality, my very small dreams of what Seoul
31:10
Speaker 1: could be. If it didn't cater to me, then I
31:12
Speaker 1: wasn't interested in it. But Krista McAuliffe, when I traveled
31:17
Speaker 1: to Guatemala, I landed and I thought, man, look at
31:21
Speaker 1: these mountains. And then I looked it up. And they
31:25
Speaker 1: have 40 volcanoes! And four of them are still active.
31:29
Speaker 1: I never lived in a place with active volcanoes that
31:34
Speaker 1: were erupting all the time. I didn't even know that
31:37
Speaker 1: was really a thing still. I knew volcanoes erupted sometimes
31:42
Speaker 1: in Hawaii and in whatever, in Iceland. I know there
31:45
Speaker 1: are places where volcanoes were erupting, but I thought they
31:48
Speaker 1: were so rare. But you go to Guatemala, Guatemala City,
31:50
Speaker 1: they're ringed by active volcanoes. It's wild. You're just living
31:54
Speaker 1: in prehistoric times, volcanically. My dream for visiting Guatemala was
32:01
Speaker 1: everything great that country can introduce me to. That's my dream.
32:06
Speaker 1: when I travel to most places. Now, when I do
32:08
Speaker 1: most things now, I'm like, please just throw all the
32:11
Speaker 1: good stuff at me and I'll try and catch as
32:13
Speaker 1: much of it as I can. And that's about as
32:15
Speaker 1: big a dream as I can dream right now. And
32:19
Speaker 1: it's working so well. It's every time I find something
32:22
Speaker 1: cool in a new country, I'm like, great. This is
32:25
Speaker 1: great that I was open to this and waiting for
32:27
Speaker 1: something cool to happen. And my dream can be sitting
32:31
Speaker 1: on my sofa or sleeping, by the way. If your
32:34
Speaker 1: dream is to do nothing, That was my dream. When
32:37
Speaker 1: I first left China, when I first retired at 32,
32:41
Speaker 1: I was like, time to sleep. And I just slept.
32:45
Speaker 1: I did a lot of sleeping. I slept half the day.
32:47
Speaker 1: I'd go out and have dinner and a drink and
32:50
Speaker 1: watch TV, and then I'd go back to bed. And
32:53
Speaker 1: I still take big old nap breaks sometimes. You don't
32:57
Speaker 1: have to always climb mountains, is what I'm saying, or
32:59
Speaker 1: go snorkeling or whatever it is. You can also just
33:02
Speaker 1: chill out. But Be open because your future can be
33:07
Speaker 1: limited by your dreams, by the way you think about
33:10
Speaker 1: the world, by the way you want to exist in
33:12
Speaker 1: the world and the way you want the world to
33:14
Speaker 1: treat you. And I'm not talking about manifesting things because
33:18
Speaker 1: I know a lot of people that do that and
33:20
Speaker 1: it doesn't seem to work for them. Having a positive
33:22
Speaker 1: attitude absolutely works, but taking a step toward taking a
33:27
Speaker 1: practical real world matter on matter step toward what you
33:31
Speaker 1: want to do That seems to make much more of
33:33
Speaker 1: a difference than thinking about how you want something. Like,
33:38
Speaker 1: you can think about taking a trip as long as
33:40
Speaker 1: you want, but until you get on the plane, you're
33:43
Speaker 1: not taking that plane trip. Take action. Make sure your
33:45
Speaker 1: dreams are large enough to accommodate your inner desires. Make
33:51
Speaker 1: sure your dreams, your lofty ideals, are big enough to
33:57
Speaker 1: fit your desires, to fit what you want from this life.
34:02
Speaker 1: And once you realize, oh, my dreams are big enough,
34:05
Speaker 1: I do want to go to the Eiffel Tower, I
34:08
Speaker 1: want to sit on the Champs-Élysées and drink wine and
34:13
Speaker 1: eat cheese and speak the France. If you want to
34:17
Speaker 1: do that, make that your dream, and then one foot
34:20
Speaker 1: in front of you, and then actually go do it.
34:22
Speaker 1: That's the future part. You have to make your future happen.
34:27
Speaker 1: You have to see your dreams as something possible. Not
34:31
Speaker 1: a wavery, shimmery, half-reality, but this thing. The Eiffel Tower
34:38
Speaker 1: is there. It's sitting in France, just hanging out. It's
34:43
Speaker 1: a real thing, as real as the concrete wall next
34:47
Speaker 1: to your apartment building is. It's a physical thing sitting there,
34:51
Speaker 1: That it's a great dream to have, but it is
34:53
Speaker 1: a physical thing that you can go be in proximity to.
34:57
Speaker 1: And you should. You should go do it if that's
34:59
Speaker 1: your dream. I still haven't been to France. I am
35:01
Speaker 1: intimidated by their language because every French person I have
35:05
Speaker 1: met has told me not to speak French. They don't
35:07
Speaker 1: like to hear it when foreigners speak French. And that's
35:11
Speaker 1: like the only country that said that. So I'm kind
35:13
Speaker 1: of like, should I try? I will. I'm going to
35:16
Speaker 1: go to France. Unless I get there and then every
35:18
Speaker 1: single person is like, no, but I feel like if
35:19
Speaker 1: I go into the supermarket or a coffee shop, and
35:23
Speaker 1: the person talking to me, merci, je suis désolé, I
35:26
Speaker 1: feel like if I use just a couple words, it'll
35:28
Speaker 1: be like everywhere else. They'll be like, oh, that's cool
35:30
Speaker 1: that he's trying. It sounds terrible, but that's fine. So
35:32
Speaker 1: what are your dreams? Are they big enough to hold
35:36
Speaker 1: your future within them? How you think of what you
35:40
Speaker 1: want in your life. Is what you're thinking large enough
35:44
Speaker 1: to hold your entire future inside of that? It should be.
35:47
Speaker 1: Krista McAuliffe nailed this quote, which... If it's not hers,
35:51
Speaker 1: you can let me know. I'm sure half of these
35:53
Speaker 1: quotes that I talk about are directly attributable somewhere else.
35:57
Speaker 1: It's so difficult to keep track of who said what first.
36:01
Speaker 1: But Krista, may your future be limited only by your
36:04
Speaker 1: dreams is a wonderful sentiment. And I think it can
36:09
Speaker 1: be a very useful practical tool for living your life
36:13
Speaker 1: the way you want to live it. You have to
36:14
Speaker 1: check if the things you're looking forward to next week,
36:17
Speaker 1: next month, the thing you're looking forward to next year,
36:21
Speaker 1: Is that as big as you want to live, or
36:24
Speaker 1: do you want to live a little bit bigger? If
36:27
Speaker 1: you want to talk to me about any of this,
36:29
Speaker 1: bitofarambler at gmail.com, bitofarambler on Lemmy and Blue Sky. I'll
36:33
Speaker 1: answer you. Thank you for people who already write in.
36:36
Speaker 1: Pretty cool of you. Oh, Shams Elisa, can you speak French?
36:41
Speaker 1: Because I can. La Rez, strawberries. See, I can speak French.
36:45
Speaker 1: May your future be limited only by your dream. Have
36:49
Speaker 1: a great day. I will speak to you Anon.